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Guidance on responding to a child’s unexplained reluctance, resistance or refusal to spend time with a parent and allegations of alienating behaviour. The first step in assessing the reasons for the child’s resistance or rejection of a parent is to consider whether domestic abuse or other forms of harmful parenting are factors. Domestic abuse and alienating behaviours can co-exist. Building on our practice guidance, our Child Impact Assessment Framework (CIAF) has been developed to help our social workers identify how children are experiencing the separation of their parents/carers and to assess the impact on them, including the impact of any potential alienating behaviours as set out in the guide to ‘children’s resistance or refusal to spending time with a parent’ guide. The Domestic Abuse Practice Guidance in the CIAF includes the following advice:
"Ensure you have clearly distinguished between harmful conflict, domestic abuse and bond breaking or alienating behaviours which lead to resistance to contact.”
Perpetrators of domestic abuse will sometimes attempt to deflect blame, or reverse culpability, by making counter-allegations that the victim is alienating the child against them when in fact their child has come to their own conclusions based on their experiences. In these circumstances, social workers are guided by the evidence/findings and do not lose sight of the distinction between the child’s ‘justified’, or ‘appropriate rejection’ of a parent as will sometimes be the case where the child has suffered domestic abuse and rejection caused by deliberately alienating or unjustified communications and behaviours. Social workers' assessments focus on what is happening for the individual child. In undertaking their assessment for the court, they try to help parents and the court understand the impact of the separation and adult behaviours on the child and what the child needs to safeguard their welfare. To be successful this requires both parents to engage positively and meaningfully with their social workers. Where a child is experiencing alienating behaviours, your social worker will use their professional judgement to assess what impact it is having on the short-term and long-term welfare of your child and what is in their best interests. They take into account any other identified risks, the child’s unique needs, their resilience and vulnerabilities, and the child’s wishes and feelings. Your social worker then reports their analysis and recommendations to the court for the judge or magistrates to consider all the evidence, including yours, before the court makes a final decision about who your child should live with and whether it is in their interests to spend time with the other parent.