How Witness Protection Manages to Keep a 100% Success Rate

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Video written by Amy Muller

[@Ominous_Walrus]

Next video: How to find someone who is in witness protection with a 100% success rate

[@inh4855]

The manhunt logistics of snitches under protection

[@jai-kk5uu]

Considering the kind of social media history people come with nowadays. I am baffled how this even works. And I am doing a tech degree .

[@1-4-johnny.cash.fan-8-8]

​@@jai-kk5uu they're probably not allowed to go online anymore. You do realize the government can stop most average people from accessing information, right? They can shut down many links and whatever.

[@jai-kk5uu]

@@1-4-johnny.cash.fan-8-8 yes but people in your new job will want to connect to you online. And specially in tech industry you need a linkedin profile.

[@deleted-something]

Fr

[@marcwenger9424]

Now I want a 30 minute Wendover feature on Mob Logistics

[@marcwenger9424]

And logistics of your favorite airline, conair!

[@thorgot911]

​@@marcwenger9424I believe he already did Conair...

[@satakrionkryptomortis]

which timeframe we talking about? ancient times? not so ancient times? 10th till 12h century? 12 to 14? 14 to 16? early american history?

[@JKG52]

How the Mob tracks down Snitches

[@marcwenger9424]

@@JKG52 Yes! Yes! And yes! Sam, make it so!

[@kickapoo1390]

The truth is that we wouldn't really know if witnesses are often found and killed because of the very nature of the program, we are just trusting the government which is obviously incentivized to show the most promising outcome.

[@Jehty_]

And everyone who gets killed just gets labeled as "didn't follow the rules" 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@jojoprocess2820]

Honestly we can extremely confidently say some have been killed but written off for reasons stated above

[@johnrichardson8209]

If life has taught me one thing, it is that claims of 100% are essentially always deceptive. And I'm doubly skeptical especially since WITSEC is specifically incentivized to try to convince people that it is perfectly safe.

[@ooooneeee]

Yeah totally agreed. I don't trust secret security agencies' claims of success.

[@greenoftreeblackofblue6625]

I feel like you would know a case where someone got killed because it would be big news.

[@OtakuUnitedStudio]

I love that Sam just outright said "The New York City government is in with the mafia."

[@wmeuse2375]

It is why they have offices all over the world😂

[@michaelvick2872]

As a New Yorker, it’s probably true. They’re literally some of the worst most useless politicians and government officials in America. And the corruption is blatant

[@iliketrains0pwned]

"In other news, scientists recently discovered that the sky is blue!!"

[@Delritho]

Come on now, the mafia at least has some standards.

[@deleted-something]

Lmao

[@dereklawr]

the roblox terms being many times longer than literally changing your entire identity had me laughing so hard 😂

[@brodriguez11000]

Easy to say, we own you. But then the military says that too.

[@CinemaDemocratica]

Someone with a KZbin channel once read the entire agreement for joining Facebook and it took nine hours.

[@adityarasendriya5138]

​@@CinemaDemocratica I bet he pressed declined

[@Woodledude]

Just a sad chuckle from me, considering all the child labor exploitation that that particular document enables.

[@kingsavage2272]

The government is efficient when it wants to be

[@milesmojave8223]

Fun fact: it's a bit of an open secret that many people under witness protection are sent to Point Roberts, Washington. The community is disconnected from the rest of the United States because it's only accessible via boat or via Canada, requiring two border crossings to get there. This adds an extra layer of protection since the overland route places two additional checks on anyone accessing the community and removes the ability to bring a firearm, so the only access is by boat. Boat only access doesn't make it impossible for crooks to reach the island, but it adds another layer of security since the area is near the border and boats in the area are closely monitored. The more you know!

[@ronblack7870]

since its a small community wouldn't they quickly know there is a new person or family in the area? so i think it's an urban legend rather than fact.

[@CyanideCarrot]

@@ronblack7870 A lot of people there are seasonal residents so it wouldn't be that unusual

[@jayteegamble]

I would think the Northwest Angle would be even better since villains would have a much tougher time getting a boat on a lake vs from anywhere on the coast

[@verde7595]

@@jayteegamble NWA is much easier to get into by land and has a relatively permanent, albeit very small, population; whereas Point Roberts is mostly tourists and seasonal residents with only one point of entry via land, so it's a lot more secure in a few different ways.

[@mintyrainbow6994]

I worlk for a NW trucking company, and we deal with five island carriers: ones for Vashon Island, San Juan Island, Orcas Island, Lopez Island, and the fifth one is Point Roberts Auto Freight. Point Roberts isn't an island, but it might as well be. ^_^

[@maddiejoy6619]

I had a teacher who was in witness protection decades before I knew her. She was able to keep her identity because her name was so common it would have been like finding a needle in a haystack.

[@adamofblastworks1517]

Then how did you know?

[@maddiejoy6619]

@@adamofblastworks1517 she told us. It had been so long and the guy was in prison, so she didn't keep it a secret.

[@lmtlouis7546]

What’s her name?

[@maddiejoy6619]

@@lmtlouis7546 previously, her first name was a super common name and her last name was Smith.

[@sabrinavladimira2079]

More like finding a needle in a needlestack.

[@CaptainMarvelsSon]

I remember a case from many years back where the witness, along with two kids, would be receiving new identities after the trial, but in the meantime they were put up in a 1-star roadside motel room for two years because the trial kept getting delayed. I'd go mad.

[@Massive-3D]

oh wow, living in a hotel where your every need is catered to daily ... wow so terrible!

[@stvia]

@@Massive-3D I don't think the were put in a 5 star hotel... Also the time till you get the trial must be extremely nerve racking when your life is on the line...

[@SecureLemons]

@@stvia yeah i can imagine, sitting on the couch watching tv, eating chips and fearing for your existence

[@crowonthepowerlines]

@@Massive-3D If this is your idea of a good time, I feel really bad for you...

[@hughcaldwell1034]

@@Massive-3D Did you somehow miss the last few years? Little refresher - people coped so badly with being asked to stay inside their own homes (with a bunch of exceptions) that they lost it after two *weeks*. I myself haven't been able to leave my house regularly for several years and can only see friends under quite stringent circumstances. Let me tell you, it isn't a fun time, and I'm not even under threat.

[@slimjimcognito]

Bill joins witness protection. His name is changed to Jim. Jim is murdered. Bill is still alive afaek. 100% success!

[@colinpovey2904]

WITSEC used to be (30+ years ago) a customer for a company I worked for, doing on-site field service at their offices. Despite me having multiple security clearances, whenever I went into one of their offices, they passed the word around, all of them stopped what they were doing, and turned the papers on their desk upside down. And their HQ was in a very unexpected location, meaning not a normal office building.

[@tvdan1043]

So it really is at Victoria's Secret at Tyson's Corner Mall?

[@richardhands904]

​@@tvdan1043 fbi incoming

[@colinpovey2904]

@@tvdan1043 Nope. But the people who worked there loved working near a mall. Arrive for work before the mall open, so parking was close and easy. Forgot to being a lunch, lots of choices in the mall. Except for December. If they had to leave the office during the day in December, then return to the office, they had a hike in front of them!

[@harrisonkarn2078]

@@colinpovey2904 thanks for the information on the location of their headquarters!

[@LimabeanStudios]

​@@harrisonkarn2078 I think they were only flipping papers over when this guy walked in haha

[@FarmerSlayerFromTheEdoPeriod]

Ah, witness protection... The thing Michael WASNT IN.

[@Knitterfest]

Of course he wasnt. No one was convicted of anything

[@iyrccafle]

WITNESS PROTECTION FOR WHAT?!

[@Michael_De_Santa-Unofficial]

Exactly.

[@leisti]

Or WAS HE?

[@gaming10701]

@@iyrccafle NO ONE WAS CONVICTED OF ANYTHING!!?!

[@gobdeep]

"Not one rule abiding witness has been harmed or killed while under protection." But we wouldn't know that... because we don't know who they are... because they have another identity. Things that make you say hmmmm.

[@mnm1273]

The agency that's running witness protection does though. Obviously they could be lying, although it being an official government stat gives it a none 0 level of credibility.

[@gobdeep]

@@mnm1273 They are from the government and they are here to help. "It's weird. Every single one of our witnesses that have been killed also dropped out of the program on the day they were killed. Glad we have that 100% success rate."

[@esmeecampbell7396]

True. In the UK I know someone, an entire family relocated to my village. A mother and about 6 kids. They couldn't be photographed etc, all to try and stop the father from finding out where they were. Within a month they'd all got Facebook accounts under their real names and were posting where they were. The kids were stupid but raised by that family you can't really blame the children, some of the teenage ones you can they should know better. Sadly the father didn't come down to deal with the mother so they've continued to live here sponging off the state these last 20 years. They don't work (because goodness me that would be too much of a risk, far safer they just spend all day socialising and claiming unemployment while going on 3 holidays per year paid for by my taxes) About a half a million pounds or more to relocate them and it was technically wasted within a month. We should recoup the cost of wasted tax payer money by selling her organs on the black market...

[@mario97br]

Dying is against the rules xD

[@KVWI]

​@@esmeecampbell7396 You sound like a really nice person, huh

[@DoctorX17]

So sad that this is the last Half as Interesting video since Sam got arrested. But I heard there’s this new channel called Halls and Interstates run by a similar person named Salvador that does similar content

[@latticepoint5245]

Is this a joke?

[@charliewebb7812]

@@latticepoint5245really bro? Yes it’s a joke 😂

[@iamacatperson7226]

@@charliewebb7812 what do you mean? He’s being serious

[@noahstrike7022]

The mall you showed is Tysons Galleria (or Tysons II). It is only designer stores, and there's no Victoria's Secret. Tysons Corner Center (or Tysons I) is the mall you're looking for. It's across the street and *does* have a Victoria's Secret. Source: I worked at Abercrombie & Fitch in Tysons I for five years.

[@CathodeRayKobold]

Living proof that no matter what you say or how insignificant the mistake is, SOMEONE with more experience will find you and correct you.

[@OnlyGrafting]

Noah, listen. It's Victoria's Secret so we get it. She's proud of you, but the gig is up.

[@bagaboiebailey]

literally didn't check what stores the mall offers 😂😂😂

[@thenorwegianbuttercrisisof2011]

I live near Tyson’s and I was like “huh, the mall sure looks different than I imagined from a satellite” but yeah that’s totally galleria now that I’m looking at it

[@phongtheorymemes3342]

I was so confused when it showed not Tyson’s

[@melimsah]

I loved the thruline bit of your identity being secret. One of your best videos yet, made me giggle.

[@mario_k]

the lore behind who Sam is thickens

[@pdrt2377]

The best part is that it’s really not, he has no issue showing his face in Jet Lag

[@eliwilson3902]

We had a guy in my neighborhood when we first moved in my parents called "witness protection guy". The guy moved in right when the neighborhood was built, was never even seen there (garbage cans ana cars would be moved so signs of life but nobody ever really met the guy) then one day out of the blue, the guy was gone. Just moved out after a few months. We have no idea if he was actually witness protection we just called him that because that would explain the oddity of the situation. Moving in, not talking to anyone, then leaving like you were never even there. Even stranger, this was before the internet but the house sold right away before they could even post a sign in the yard.

[@ben2474]

The majority of witness protection houses are those seized by the FBI / government bodies in general, be it through busts/raids or court case wins, etc. They then turn those houses into witness protection safehouses. Few are just bought on the open market, at least the ones we know about....

[@kiiturii]

basically what I am to my neighbours as a night shift worker lol

[@edwardscott3262]

Growing up there was a house in our neighborhood all the kids thought sold cocaine. Cocaine because the type of people were a lot more rough than you would see with like say a pot dealer. The people there didn't work, weren't disabled or anything like that. It turned out they had ads in the yellow pages and newspapers for years for escorts. All us dumb kids called those ads for laughs not knowing the calls were literally going to a neighbor. The rough looking people we saw were pimps and hookers dropping off their part of the deal. They ran those ads for years. They were exactly what you have heard and they had no fear from law enforcement. Law enforcement at that time was too busy harassing the old guy with cancer in the neighborhood for his grass being too long or harassing others for unplanted cars in their driveways to ever car about in your face human trafficking.

[@yankees29]

Sounds like he was a really smart drug dealer.

[@ricequackers]

I'm interested to know how WITSEC defends against its own officers being compromised and corrupted by criminals. If I was a mob boss I'd be trying to get one of my own guys hired to work there.

[@tymenvanessen3119]

like he said, a witsec officer would only know about 1 family in the program at a time, which they do not get to choose. so the chance that a well monitored person would be putting in the work to only maybe get to know the location of the specific snitch they are trying to catch would be way to much work.

[@Berkeloid0]

@@tymenvanessen3119 But if the mob boss got 10 of his guys hired...?

[@AG-yc7vt]

@@Berkeloid0 The mob boss is going to have to wait for 20 years of their US Marshal career to pass before they get considered for WITSEC. Also they need a spotless record since WITSEC agents are usually doing it until they retire or are promoted to Head of Special Agents. (The top of WITSEC). So position’s don’t open up for years unless someone retires.

[@despareint]

@@Berkeloid0 you think that the mob boss or anyone simply could get into the Witsec?

[@Berkeloid0]

@@despareint No, I think it would be nearly impossible. But the person I was replying to said the program could not be compromised because your informant would only deal with one case at a time, so I pointed out that if you were capable of getting one informant in there, then you only need repeat the process to get more informants in there in order to compromise it.

[@kaitlyn__L]

Was lowkey hoping you'd mention how Henry Hill (from Goodfellas) actually got kicked out of the witness protection program because he kept bragging about being the guy from Goodfellas when he got drunk and they got sick of having to relocate him so many times. Also his wife divorced him partly because of all the hassle of the aforementioned relocations.

[@realdragon]

I don't think this should be a thing

[@f4rr3r]

This is… not true. He was kicked out of witness protection for dealing cocaine several years before Goodfellas was released.

[@kaitlyn__L]

@@f4rr3r he was kicked out multiple times, IIRC it was 3 or 4 times

[@Wendy_O._Koopa]

Wait... is Goodfellas... _real?_ By which I mean based on a true story? I've never actually seen it, all I know about it is that it held the record for most F-bombs for some time.

[@caitlyn8475]

⁠@@Wendy_O._Koopayup! Based off a book called “Wise Guy” by Nicholas Pileggi! Good read

[@Zanzubaa]

I wonder what happens if the witness has debts they cannot immediatly pay off. Even a mortage could get complicated if you where in negative equity.

[@Xenuos]

I'd guess it all goes through WITSEC and they handle it for them

[@garf02]

I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY!!!!

[@theshuman100]

thats why the success rate only applies to law abiding citizens

[@Keitorin2013]

I was thinking the same. I have quite a bit of student loan debt, so if I was required to pay it all off before getting my new identity… I’d be screwed, hahaha! 😅

[@Berkeloid0]

@@Keitorin2013 If they can set people up with a new birth certificate and fake school records, I'm sure they could arrange a new student loan you have to pay off, and use the proceeds to anonymously pay off the original loan. They'd effectively transfer the debts to your new identity, in a way that doesn't leave any sort of paper trail.

[@brainandforce]

I love how your sons are Oscar and Lando. McLaren fan confirmed.

[@dfp327]

Poor Sam...

[@CaseFaceMcGee]

Zak Brown probably wants to enter witness protection based on how this season is starting

Not surprising, as he had a McLaren cap in season 3 of Jet Lag.

[@sotongz88]

He gave Lando's birthdate to Oscar at 3:01

[@michaelstooksbury2256]

My grandfather was head of transportation for James Earl Ray (MLK’s killer) after he escaped from prison. The press got so bad, and because they were afraid he’d be assassinated, they sent an empty prison van to the front of the courthouse and drove Ray to the back in my Grandmother’s 1960’s Ford Falcon. I still have the cigarette lighter from that Ford Falcon.

[@b-chroniumproductions3177]

That car would be a museum piece now

[@bongwaterbaptist]

james earl ray did not kill MLK.

[@the.abhiram.r]

and the car clapped

[@yapflipthegrunt4687]

fym MLK's killer, he was framed, even MLK's family believe he was framed

[@thesourpatchkidd579]

Our sense of reality is warped by tv and film. Because stories around law enforcement agencies continue to be one of the most profitable genres out there we take what we see as fact- there’s a consistent way Hollywood portrays each career path and it’s activities, but in reality it’s way more boring than you’d think. The same is true for witness protection. As long as you follow the rules you would be safe- it’s when you slip up that you get caught up. But media opts for the more dramatized version where super assassins can find a needle in the ocean because it makes for a more exciting story, but because we see it so often we take it as fact.

[@hansshekelstein9450]

Yep. It’s pretty constant across anything. Military shows love to hype the 1% of things, the “super elite navy seal team”, or documentaries love to focus on the “war winning wonder weapons” when 99% of the military is not that, and most of the important weapons of war are mass produced and pretty average. Same with heist or crime movies too. The most effective robberies are the simple, low security banks. Most criminal murders and hits are usually the easiest and most deniable, like drive bys or something. You know not multi step high profile bank heists or teams of highly trained gunmen storming a mansion to kill one guy. Real life is just pretty mundane.

[@ratoim]

It's scary how well some bad guys can do their job. Get tasked to find witness, learn of funeral, realize witness may show up, remember witness has house in area, confirm witness presence at funeral, drive over to house, and rig bomb without being seen or leaving traces that would tip off witness. And since this wasn't a one person operation, there had to have been close timed coordination between the those who handled the relationship aspect and those who handled the hardware.

[@justinwyllie3359]

You don't have to do all that planning. Just leave a bomb there as a backup plan in case they come back. It's pretty simple to assume that someone will go back to their house. They most likely didn't know that he was back and just left it there when they saw the empty house.

[@realdragon]

It doesn't have to be bomb, witness could have "accident"

[@adamofblastworks1517]

3:33 "at least 90 days of subsistence payments... On average about $1,150 a week." That's more than TWICE what I made while working in a factory.

[@iprq7276]

So? The government takes away the money the second he stops looking for the job and it's only for 90 days. What do you expect? The government to literally rip away everything in his life and survive in a foreign area with nothing?

[@hint0122]

Me too

[@buggytheprophet1017]

Fun fact: when a witness is found, the program takes their designation as “protected witness” away from said person, so they never lose a “protected witness”

[@gavhoffdrums3129]

Could you imagine being transported in a mail truck, I'm willing to bet if there going that far they probably put the witness in a box as well to get him from the truck to inside lol

[@brodriguez11000]

Funny how the picture of the "mail truck" was a Fedex truck. Talk about rough handling.

[@joew8438]

Stationing cartel witnesses in Orange County is the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. It's too close to the Southern border and the main smuggling corridor. Hit teams can just drive in and drive out. Or the witnesses themselves could decide to flee the country and be out of the country before breakfast. Other than El Paso or Nogales, I can't imagine there's a worse spot for a drug witness.

[@joseville]

That's why they sent him to Aspen, CO instead (Good point though)

[@leotrollstoy2351]

I really wish witness protection would be offered more often in gang cases, how could you expect someone to put a bullseye on their head without protecting them?

[@MICHAEL-ke7vh]

Michael Townley (DeSanta) was never in witness protection!

[@mildredthegoat8340]

Those of us who are pretty nifty, are grateful for the extra work you put into the little details! It made my day!

[@dumbeau]

:)

[@grl_adventures]

Love your videos! Tyson’s corner mall is 10min from where I was born and raised and it’s always been the closest mall! :) Always excited when you come out with new videos! You’re going great work!

[@777gpower]

4:20 so now I’m curious about Half as Interesting’s past

[@sashaschmidt2019]

The town he mentioned that with the relocation is also the town where he lives

[@DinoRicky]

@@sashaschmidt2019I think it’s just a skit as this vid was made by Amy miller and unless she’s ratting him out than it’s fake

[@the_reconnaisant]

Sam, can you make a video about the logistics of bricks? 😊

[@Ralofguy]

The bricks are under witness protection, speaking about bricks is strictly prohibited.

[@nnnnnn6793]

the delivery and writing of the line "super murdered" had me pig laughing. please keep doing wat you're doing.

[@vigilantcosmicpenguin8721]

I love how this channel keeps building lore about Sam from HAI. It's like he's an entirely different persona from Sam Denby.

[@LaszloR1]

Witness protection for what? No one was convicted of anything.

[@carltonleboss]

Davey!

[@Rebelgamer-1111]

Cougars are in missions now?

[@brettabraham]

Half as Interesting: exposing the secrets that keep witnesses safe for your enjoyment! 😂 Edit: secrets that are keeping him safe???

[@markmcdonald1022]

This may sound strange, but I was so excited to hear the ad read. 80000 hours is an excellent organization that helps people do good in the world more effectively. And I'm all about efficiency.

[@BodywiseMustard]

Thank you to whoever put in the sponsorblock sections for filler/jokes. There are seven of them and I'm glad I didn't have to experience them

[@jeffkadlec8264]

Some of your videos are funny & informative. Others are ridiculously hilarious & informative. This one was the latter - great job!!

[@ultrab2777]

As an Aspen lover, seeing how often such an awesome place comes up in your videos is really sick.

[@artielikesthings]

Crime Spree feels a lot different after watching this video

[@egyphon]

Loved it! I loved the show In Plain Sight you referenced.

[@im_nikkys]

Thanks for leaving the ad at the end of the video, some people put mid roll ads and it can completely ruin the video for me.

[@ethangraff8704]

Amazing that Sam could afford to hire the Bojack Horseman writers for that intro

[@djb1634]

It is easy to get 100% success when you grade your own test. In other words you are not meant to know who is in WP. Therefore anyone who goes “missing” can be said to not have been in WP.

[@rwall514]

Wait, Tyson's corner mall? There was a hotel there with a bunch of cables that nobody could explain running into it when it was demolished! Right on Leesburg Pike.

[@Beaula2]

That song near the end is chill AF

[@Aesthetycs]

0:36 “not one rule-abiding witness has been harmed or killed” until there’s Trevor.

[@cannedfrootloops7803]

A certain speedrunner is now feeling a disturbance in the force

[@jontedeakin1986]

1:37 shocks me that polygraphs are still used in the modern justice system

[@Thylaacine]

Yeah they suck

[@R_C420]

Artificial Intelligence can polygraph yo ass wirelessly

[@Thylaacine]

@@R_C420 (censored) (censored) (censored) and (censored) or (censored) (censored)

[@theultimatereductionist7592]

I love the "vacation-style" music in the background.

[@spddiesel]

"My Blue Heaven" is a great movie featuring witness protection. It's also considered the comedy version of "Goodfellas," kinda.

[@robbienorton9522]

it worked back before internet days...today not so much.

[@imjustkenough]

As a NOVA resident, that 2 second Tysons mention made me feel so seen

[@insertchannelnamehere8685]

Except he put the pin on the wrong mall ( Tysons Corner mall is across 123, he put it on the Tysons Galleria)

[@JK-mo2ov]

That moment when half as interesting becomes a full blown Wendover video.

[@mrshadow4007]

Thanks a lot! This video just helped me find my buddy Michael after he ghosted me one day. The other guys in the crew will be so happy.

[@kevindavis5693]

The joke about Waffle House was absolutely perfect.

[@galenwilds3273]

I would 100% believe that every waffle house is staffed purely by ex-mafiosos in witness protection

[@Firescout23]

2:04 That's not Tyson's Corner Mall, that's Tyson's Galleria. Tyson's Corner is on the other side of 123. That's its northern parking garage at the bottom center of the video

[@thegeneralissimo470]

Excellent as always.

[@Ram-en3zq]

2:57 those 2 weird sons are not gonna have a fun time this year at McLaren

[@alphaca66]

They are having fun this year tho

[@gabrielc7861]

Michael Townley

[@ada1]

Oh come on man, you KNOW he wasnt in witness protection

[@TommyCullen-VacuumConnisour]

wayyyy finally found a dviper reference

[@Kiwi2703]

One question though - even if someone in witness protection were harmed, would we, the general public, actually get to know about it?

[@SocksPropaganda]

Well they tend to have an ethical responsibility to report accurate data but we know the government doesn't always act ethically. It's probably not too far off though

[@isthissparta1485]

@@SocksPropaganda Or they have a greater ethical responsibility to bust organized crime, so they classify someone who gets harmed as a rule breaker so more witnesses are willing to rat on organized crime groups

[@marietailor3100]

Or there’s the more charitable way to look at it. Criminals thinking it’s possible to successfully murder witnesses in protection makes it more likely that those criminals will try and/or succeed. If it seems like finding and killing someone in witsec is impossible, then criminals will resort to other tactics that don’t involve going after those people.

[@user-ip5hm5tb8z]

​@@marietailor3100i do not say It IS Impossible... People are flawed...

[@aidankelly4543]

good looks for doing the ad at the end

[@-szega]

0:40 One easy bureaucrats trick: Everyone who ends up hurt is found to have broken a rule, nobody said breaking a rule had anything to do with getting hurt.

[@HowsThatApp]

I know a guy who knows a guy who knows another guy who can do this without the paperwork. Just call him and ask him for a vacuum cleaner.

[@Jacob_Buehler]

It’s crazy how accurate this is!

[@nobye9716]

My mom went missing 5 years ago, the police said it's very possible she is in witsec and he would never know to tell us...

[@ToLovelyJesus]

That was very interesting, thank you.

[@Moonflower-gn3xd]

0:07 sounds like a Bojack horseman bit

[@blazernitrox6329]

We know where you are, Sean. We're coming for you.

[@oscar_r69420]

why would you warn him... 🤦‍♂

[@blazernitrox6329]

@@oscar_r69420 Shock and Awe

[@yuuneeq9494]

1:20 one of the funniest pics I've seen this week.

[@adamashforthdrums]

The background music is actually distractingly good and funky 🔥 😂

[@teradaryo]

This is a great video that I've watched in full to the end!

[@Soul-Burn]

The whole 6 minutes? Not bad, not bad.

[@Massive-3D]

me who watched 1 HOUR SILENCE BLACK SCREEN HD in full:

[@real_dddf]

@@Massive-3D is there even a difference between HD and 480p for that said video?

[@paveladamek3502]

As a person currently in the program and happily living in Intercourse, PA I can attest to the accuracy of this description and I will say this Intercourse was a hit and a-mish.

[@glitchinthesystem4798]

2:35 MFW HAI mentions the city where I live.

[@Yaheeeeee]

This man just made a perfect Glock advertisement “instead of stitches get switches” 😂

[@twofive9068]

Love how the two weird sons are Oscar and Lando.

[@fsmoura]

By eliminating the witnesses when they fail, so no one is ever the wiser! ( o.o)

[@manavnaik6859]

The start of this video rhyming was fire

[@sneakydoom]

That clip of "Aspen" looking real salt lakey @ 4:11

[@theemclane4037]

2:18 IS THAT HOMELANDER from The Boys?

[@alchemyty]

At one point (about 3:00) it's mentioned he can't change identities until he pays off all his debts then quickly moved on. How does one "quickly" pay off their debts? I'd assume the program helped with it?

[@tubanbodyslammer9125]

I'm still thinking about John lapolla

[@Dinoakin991]

I know the dude who essentially wrote the book for this, he changed his identity around 19 times. It’s pretty cool

[@JasonicDistortion]

Sam, thanks for recognizing that I'm pretty nifty, and yes, it was pretty wild that I decided to check that last ¶. Thanks for putting in the extra effort!

[@dumbeau]

:)

[@mired914]

"but the rats don't run this city, we do". made me laugh lol. thanks

[@chrispychip6569]

One mistake you made was when you put that pin on "tysons corner mall". There is no plave called that. There are two main big malls at tysons corner. The one you have highlighted is called Tysons galleria or tysons 2 which does not have a victorias secret. The other mall is tysons corner center which does have a victorias secret.

[@YoWassupFresh]

Wow. Sam out here blowing the spot up. Bruh now they gotta change trucks.

[@wgrandbois]

I guess Sam has decided to just be open about living in Aspen now that he's usually off galivanting around the world. :P

[@Michael_De_Santa-Unofficial]

I was never in Witness Protection.

[@OveranalyzingEverything]

Something someone in witness protection would say.

[@ulyssesm.daniels6927]

I appreciate you.

[@32OrtonEdge32dh]

Someone already mentioned getting the map wrong for Tysons, but it also doesn't have an apostrophe. Just trying to help you pad the next Mistakes video

[@Topgun232]

1:05 bro is trying to hold in his laughter.

[@CinemaDemocratica]

Mother's maiden name: Wend Father's maiden name: Over Transcripts: All D's and F's Both the buyer and the seller of the house have (at least some of) a real address, and in that document it is revealed that Sam is also the owner of the Miami Heat, which he runs out of his house, but still doesn't know that the possessive form of "it" is "its" without the apostrophe. The sale price of the house is $2.2Billion. His only unpaid debt is his tuition to Keiser University, the balance of which was due eight years ago.

[@HalfAsleepSam]

Just pointing out that Sam is totally not in witness protection, Sam is totally a name that people not in witness protection would ever pick

[@lumberjackofalltrades]

knock knock "FBI OPEN UP" "Hol on lemme do this ad read really quick" "aight bet"

[@amwitty_]

Tyson Corner's Mall is pretty lit, witsec got it going good

[@RyanPlate]

4:30 "...where they get suuuper murdered" 😂

[@mattsonn]

Did you just listen to the stuff they don’t want you to know podcast? That just did a great episode on witness protection.

[@nityodaytekchandani701]

5:25 that's a nice text

[@Mirsab]

The title "Princess Protection Program" used to confuse me so much when I was younger!

[@vigilantcosmicpenguin8721]

I still can't hear the words "witness protection program" without thinking of that movie.

[@gianfrancoortizvera6161]

Witness protection for what?! No one was convicted of anything

[@juleswillow]

was looking for this comment 😂