Haribo Sugar Free Classic Gummi Bears [Bizarre Amazon Reviews]

Why would anyone eat these?!
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[@zacharyhawley1693]

I'm a terrible person. I bought these and put them in a bowl on my desk. My co-workers have all told me they thought they were dying. But they haven't put two and two together yet.

[@derp33squid]

Oh boy Be prepared for living hell when they do

[@zacharyhawley1693]

derp33squid oh please if they can steal all my supplies they can deal with some intestinal distress.

[@ocarinaninja6182]

Oh *do* go on...

[@Backyardmech1]

I have thought about setting a jar of them out in the break room at the office just to watch the traffic to the restrooms increase.

[@spongeintheshoe]

@@Backyardmech1 Make the restrooms paid.

[@kattriella1331]

Okay, fun fact for anyone who doesn't know: Certain artificial sweeteners like the ones often used in sugar free candies and cookies, have a laxative effect when eaten in large quantities. My grandparents are both diabetic and my mother has worked as a pharmacy technician for 15+ years, we've had to do a lot of research about this kind of thing. Trust me, guys, don't screw with the artificial sweeteners. They will mess you up if you anger them . . .

[@prolyhigh]

So horrible 🫠

[@_Iscream]

Depends on the sweetener. Erythritol, for instance, is fine. Maltitol (the main component in these gummy bears and many other sugar free treats) on the other hand, is actually used as a laxative prior to colonoscopies. So yeah- it’s just a straight up laxative.

[@punkleton9901]

@@_Iscream no necroing threads. (Warn 1)

[@WackoMcGoose]

@@_Iscream I'm unfortunate enough that ALL artificial sugars have this effect on me, regardless of dosage. Anything from diet soda to a single sugar-free cough drop causes me to channel Jeremy Clarkson's P45 test drive on the motorway. _"A LOT OF POO SHOT OUT THEN!"_

[@_Iscream]

@@WackoMcGoose but some are literally incapable of being processed by the body AND by gut bacteria, like erythritol. Maybe it’s not the actual sweeteners, but something they’re adding alongside them?

[@AbadonXXX]

when I saw the three wolf moon shirt I knew you were going to do this and was more than pleased

[@therealslmccl]

What monster would buy SUGAR FREE GUMMI BEARS?!! The absolute madlads.

[@nunyabiznasty8914]

The irony here is that these reportedly taste great due to a good balance of fruit aroma and sugar substitute.

[@grasshopperchick374]

FandomTrash93 people who can’t have sugar? Or aren’t trusted with sugar? WHAT YOU CANT PROVE NOTHING YOU HAVE TO TALK TO MY LAWYER FIRST!!!

[@sugar-freegummybears5534]

😅

[@owen5026]

Y'all asses explode when you eat those? Wimps

[@UltraIsa297]

Diabetics

[@avery1093]

Moral of the story: Don't screw with the sugar free gummy-bears....

[@colorheart1113]

Avery BigMess I see Thomas Sanders

[@grasshopperchick374]

AVERY!!! How are you?

[@nedward_06]

I like your profile pic

[@Kaeros77]

Your name and pfp.. 10/10

[@avery1093]

Alaura Alcero I'm good! How are you?

[@SpacedOutAlpaca]

I knew this one and I feel overly proud of myself for that. This is what my life has come to, being proud of myself for knowing about reviews for Sugar Free Gummi Bears

[@ocarinaninja6182]

Same

[@anonymousstrangeness7348]

My God, our lives are pathetic 😓

[@utemakoto]

My favorite review for these is the airport one where it "hits" while the dude is in the middle of the security line

[@luminariel3765]

It's because most sugar free candies use sucrose (sucralose?) as a sweetener. It is also the most common laxative

[@MaddTheSane]

Lumi Nariel because the body can’t break it down, so it treats it like a poison and *purges!*

[@raptunoc787]

Sucralose? Like the main ingredient for Splenda sweetener?

[@genericgamertag253]

The other ones are made with mutinol, another, very powerful laxative

[@_Iscream]

Sucralose just tastes sweet, but doesn’t have the properties of sugar and is extremely concentrated. Maltitol, on the other hand, is what was used here- and is actually used in medical settings as a laxative. It just so happens that it can mimic many of the chemical properties of sugar.

[@dusk4974]

Sucralose, maltitol, aspartame, ascuflame, those are the bad ones I know. However Stevia, Monkfriut, Erythritol, Xylitol, all have no such effect because they're natural sweeteners that don't act like sugar or sugar alcohols. Source: I cut out sugar two years ago (coming up on three) and can't reintroduce it. Russel Stover's has awesome stevia sweetened candies!

[@camramaster]

Tried the bears. They are not shitting you. But they are me. Oh dear

[@KaleBennett]

Pun: If you or a loved on have sufferred from explosive diarrhea you may be entitled to financial constipation

[@amberheart3508]

WHY DO THESE MONSTERS EXIST? AND WHY WOULD ANYBODY MAKE THEM?? I feel sorry for the innocent souls that ate them

[@sugar-freegummybears5534]

That rhymes

[@DarkShard5728]

@@sugar-freegummybears5534DEMON

[@Josue-qu7ln]

"Ladies and gentlemen.....And non's" Me: SO THOMAS SANDERS AND MILESCHRONICLES AREN'T THE ONLY ONES THAT DO THAT!

[@erin.8403]

Honestly that might be one of my favourite ways I've hear someone word that

[@ThunderScorpionMusic]

These gummy bears are sugarless, which probably means they are sweetened with either aspartame or erytyratol, probably erytyratol cuz erytyratol, of consumed in large amounts will give the consumer dhirarea, If your eating these I recommend eating them in small portions at a time

[@nunyabiznasty8914]

madman actually did it. well done, the gods of the comment section are pleased... _for now..._

[@SethraLaVode]

If I had to guess they put to much sorbitol in them. Sorbitol is a chemical often used as an artificial sweetener. However, in large douses it is a laxative. I personally am extremely sensitive to it and cant have anything with it in it.

[@solarcupid2583]

I've only heard of these legendary gummibears

[@shinyumbreon194]

*Kids and grownups love them so*

[@IamshinyCM]

*the happy world of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!*

[@Paradoxum177]

The crappy world of Haribo

[@SilverShadow13100]

Y-you actally went through with it? You actally took a look at the link I sent you!?! This is the happiest day of my life...

[@BlueCoffeeBeanBoi]

Omg I requested Pat to do this the last time xD Thanks for listening to me Pat! I hoped you liked these horrible but hilarious stories! There are more stories than this. There’s one about an airport. That one has to be the worst but the best.

[@grasshopperchick374]

BlueCoffeeBeanBoi I’m listening.

[@WarriorcatsWolvesandRoblox]

Alaura Alfredo if I think about what they’re saying is the same one...go to amazon and look for the one that has around 6k reviews...you’ll eventually find one about an airport xD

[@WarriorcatsWolvesandRoblox]

Alcero. Stupid autocorrect xD

[@briannanimations71605]

God made gummy bears with sugar it was his first good creation and then Satan came along

[@LittleBlackbirdRaven]

Hail Satan!

[@AidanDaGreat]

@@LittleBlackbirdRaven you need to find tastier laxatives bro

[@aaartemisss]

I'm so glad others like to read odd reviews also Thank you for spreading the joy of review reading

[@werdna213]

More Amazon reviews of sugar free gummy bears please

[@elizar666]

This is very well done but probably wasn't a good idea to watch while in bed with food poisoning

[@nuriocristino2888]

I only had to read the title to know what was coming.... O_O

[@mivapusa]

I remember the first time I came across those reviews, and laughing so much I nearly soiled myself

[@Xion_Toshiro]

These are the most relatable stories, the repeat trips back to the bathroom & toilet are like Rounds & Waves, in a Survival Mode on a Game

[@thecloudsarefalling3116]

Okay, this is the best crappy Amazon review.

[@dracos0024]

Hehe. Crappy.

[@grasshopperchick374]

OHMYGOW ALL MY FRIENDS ARE HERE!!!

[@WackoMcGoose]

Fun fact: These exist in the Loisteverse (INFRA and Obenseuer), as _Huribo Evil Bear._ In INFRA, they were sent to the Metal Workers Union to, ahem, "disrupt" a strike meeting they were planning (and you get structural-repair photo credit for the bathrooms they destroyed!). In Obenseuer, they're a consumable item that gives you a quite rapid *+80%* to bowel fullness, second only to the _Obenseuerian Sewer Fish_ which instantly fills you to 100% capacity. Eat six bags of these, and you game-over from shit seizure.

[@youmaybehighstrungbutimlok1601]

I also read on these comments on sugar free gummy bears that thay taste as if Skittles were peeing on your mouth and once you had one you cant stop eating them. So here's the moral of the warnings if your constipated eat the sugar free gummy bears and be come unclogged

[@exerberus2316]

Why do i wanna bring them to school and pass them out for free

[@Paradoxum177]

Exerberus The dude it’s a good thing I don’t like gummy bears because I wouldn’t put it past some of my classmates to do this

[@holliehrm7928]

God making jellatine (forgive my spelling): G: Ok. Let's make some food. A: Ok. G: we could make little weird squishy things that are firm at the same time... A: odd, but, ok. G: make it juicy and give it lots of different varieties of flavours, that all taste the same. A: what? G: and make the humans mould it into loads of different shapes that make no difference to the actual thing what so ever. A: Mhm? G: Oh! Make sure it's made of loads of discusting things like pig trotters. A: WHAT THE FRICK? WHO WOULD EVEN EAT THAT? THAT'S HORRIBLE! G: hmm, yes, I guess you're right. The humans will eat it and it will taste amazing and be very addictive. A: but it's still- G: Make it unhealthy. A: then who would- G: shut up, Lucifer! A: He left ages ago...

[@1mariomaniac]

Gelatin :) Close tho.

[@aceofdiamonds8164]

Ah, so that explains the week-long *incident* I had one time. Thank you for bringing this to my attention.

[@patrickphilip777]

The lyrics of the song Intestinal Crank by Cannibal Corpse describes a fraction of the pain of eating these bears.

[@ninjabgwriter]

Ok but if you have chronic constipation (I've got a genetic thing where my bowels don't have nearly enough nerve endings, so it's unfortunately very easy for me to become so because they're all but completely numb so I usually can't tell when I have to use the restroom, and the muscles needed to do so are very weak), eating way too much sugar free candy is WAY better than chugging laxatives in water/juice. It was way worse when I was a kid (legitimately life threatening, it was so bad that the doctors wanted to operate but were scared it would kill me), and I had to drink laxatives regularly. The only way my parents could get me to take them was in cherry juice because it was my favorite, and I was way too young to understand I was in so much danger. Honestly most of the treatments were extremely painful and unpleasant, but if they'd handed me a bag of candy and told me to eat it all, I would have been ecstatic. Now that I'm an adult I understand how to do everything I can to prevent from getting into that much danger again, but I do legitimately use the candy trick if I have a bad day. Laxative candy is way better than risking a burst bowel and dying a horrible painful death. When I had to get a throat surgery, I healed very slowly so mostly ate liquid and jello for several weeks, and when I switched back to solids, I got constipated worse than I have since I was like 5, and the sugar free candy was a huge help. It wasn't life threatening, but I was pretty scared. Being able to fix it by just eating way too many turtle candies is an ideal outcome in my book.

[@Xion_Toshiro]

The more I hear & read the reviews; the more I want to try myself, just to see what my own review would be...

[@panicatmybrain5933]

does this happen only if you eat all of them at once or like a quarter?

[@nunyabiznasty8914]

This is what happens after about 8 to 12 pieces, i.e. practically a small handful. Hellbears, that's what they are.

[@panicatmybrain5933]

omg wow

[@MaddTheSane]

You’re only supposed to eat two or 3.

[@animesenpai1163]

@@MaddTheSane 3 can still trigger it tbh.

[@quill4965]

I was honestly expecting a god creating things

[@WyxienTheFox]

Krazie_Kookie God creating sugar free gummy bears: G: Okay, so take the gummy bears we made a while ago. A: Okay. G: Make them sugar free. A: That's nice! Now people with sugar problems can ea- G: And make it if you eat them, that your intestines explode. A: THEN WHAT'S THE POINT?! G: *Whispers* You'll see. *Snickers* A: Oh no.

[@quill4965]

MCmaster2014 lol noice one

[@myturtleisbestturtlehisnam3654]

MCmaster2014 God = Worst than Satan

[@WyxienTheFox]

Krazie_Kookie Why thank you. I literally came up with that as soon as I saw your comment. 😆

[@quill4965]

;)

[@danielbickford3458]

I'm honestly quite impressed you managed to say this entire thing without a single cackle, giggle, or laugh

[@BetterCallBigShotAutos]

...you miiight need to rethink that first part

[@danielbickford3458]

@@BetterCallBigShotAutos I hate Auto corrupt

[@Hanhan-fi1dr]

0:00 - 3:20 Me: this is a mediocre video 3:30 *help me* Me: *WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE*

[@celestekeil6601]

yesss im so happy you did these lmao. the only other hilarious set of reviews i can think of is for The Moby, but its NSFW/NSFL

[@NotLegallyAGeologist]

talked about gummy bears, and my yearbook teacher brought them up. she pulled up a review and i read it a dramatically as possible

[@Xion_Toshiro]

This sounded like a Found Footage Audio File, which makes it all the better

[@sirplsputyergunaway573]

My stomach just started hurting hearing this

[@phoenixx8963]

Without even watching, i can tell by the discailmer this is about the sugar free gummy bears. There is no other possibility it could be

[@katelynpeck7484]

[god makes blobfish] G: take a human head A:wtf.... G:now make them pink. A:omg please st- G:NOW MAKE THEM ALL GROSS AND SLIMY A:WHY G: oh yeah and make humans use them for memes, and some people think they are cute. A: ok then (whyyy) A:a name? G: THE BLOB FISH A:....BUT WHYYYYYYYY

[@Hexagonaldonut]

I've seen the after effects of consuming these things be described as a volcanic eruption, so yeah. This review ain't shitting around. The reviewer, however, definitely was. A lot.

[@Inky_Blu]

I have been waiting for you to do this one!!!!

[@antoniopolonski5371]

I'm the type of person to buy these go to a friend's house on April fools and eat the entire thing and then boom they have to deal with the smell until they can finally unclogged their toilet

[@christiancasaverdepertica1802]

I got these as a prank one April's fools. I was fine for about two hours, and then all back broke loose

[@kos2919]

You don't read one of the review where a lady took it to her workplace (a construction yard with portapotty toilet) and hilarity ensues when the workers ate the gummy "

[@kaly7781]

YES OMG I forgot about the hell gummy bears mini-meme 😂

[@ecm84ee]

I have stomach and bowel disease, also lactose intolerant. So i laughed so f**king hard listening to peoples creative descriptions of what happens to me at least twice a week. Laughing so much it hurts!

[@thatonedude4237]

king gummy bear sends his regards

[@ranosian1135]

Halloweens coming. Ive ordered 100 and getting ready to give them out. Mwha ha ha ha ha ha ah

[@RexiChan19]

I know about this report, but I had never seen the one below it.

[@Winglesscat]

My dad is buying them for his coworkers

[@trexthriving]

I HAD A HECTIC WEEKEND AND I HAVE NEVER BEEN SADDER TO MISS AN UPLOAD I'M SORRY SENPAI

[@frakspikes2619]

welp... i guess we can say that they were in... "deep deep doo doo..." i know my jokes are shit butt still...

[@BoReads]

Dude, I read this the other day and I couldn't stop laughing.

[@georgesipes2585]

HOW DID YOU READ THIS WITHOUT LAUGHING

[@HobbiesGamesChillin]

That person is dead and this was written by their next of kin as a warning

[@mikpiktew-4638]

PM SEYMORE uploads... Ye boi.

[@rikmcdik6662]

I had half a pound before bed not knowing the future outcome. My bowels were a war zone that woke me from my sleep in the morning.

[@butitwasmedio]

Welcome to the Amazon review section I guess....

[@KikiKagePro]

My friend bought these and regrettably ate the whole bag in one day. He wasn't seen again for two whole days.

[@skyleroliver1283]

do the giant beachball one. i forget what its called but its great

[@anoneamose4866]

This is great. I’ve encountered this. Family got them for my dad. My mother said, while we were getting them wrapped for his present, “if he eats too many, he’ll shit.” Which made me laugh. So I wrote that quote in his birthday card.... my father did not head the quote I wrote that my mother spoke. Heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh

[@noriakikakyoin6983]

Bro Joshua wrote that review like it was a page from American Psycho

[@niceguytova9794]

I dunno why,but I'm imagining a war between Haribo SUGAR FREE Clasic Gummi Bears and Joshua(the one who writed the review) while they are playing American Football...Oh,and that Red Wedding from Game of Thrones too.

[@lilithrey3936]

Thank you so much for the warning! Sorry can’t watch this (isn’t that how youtubers get money?) but I’ll give you a like as usual because you’re one of the best KZbinrs ever!

[@graslinyeetus5470]

Ah yes. The Haribo hell bears

[@bunkiki844]

Rip... But someone had to do it to save others. QAQ he is a savior. Thank you for you service

[@drcoomercat4426]

Good thing I now know what not to eat now... cause I eat almost anything.

[@breannahidalgo6328]

Give these out at Halloween

[@tangible3608]

Ive read these personally years ago. It was hilarious

[@claudettes9697]

I don't eat sugar few anything, it's awful, but a lb of anything at a time isn't good for you. Temperance, and savers for laters.

[@yimishuchan2554]

DEVIL CREATES RAP. Devil: Make evil music Demon: What the actual FU*k? Devil: Make it contain foul language, and rhyme Demon: Ok???? Devil: Oh, make humans battle with it. I mean roast each other Demon: Like burns from home Devil: You know me so well Demon: Thanks boss Devil: Make someone make a musical about Alexander Hamilton, and use it Demon: What are you going to call it Devil:Rape, I mean Rap sorry I added a "E" to the end Demon: works with me😈

[@yimishuchan2554]

It took me 2 days to write this.

[@carleysplace8596]

God damn, i hope those got recalled

[@makedashenault5672]

Your blessed Pat wonderful voice 🙏🙏

[@PepThePumkin]

These always make me laugh 🤣

[@kirilvelinov7774]

They're so horrible even the regular ones also made me poop😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@yormpbirdhouse4407]

When Christmas comes up I’m going to buy 3 lb’s of Putini Italian JuJubes. Two lbs of those are for my friends. 1lb is for me to eat over the course of the year. I’m not going to do what this man did. They needs help.

[@annarose9113]

Didn't the sugar free gummy bears get recalled? I remember hearing something about people having bathroom troubles.

[@mikiroberts733]

SUGAR FREE GUMMY BEARS OH MY GOD

[@spencerwoods3404]

I HAVE SEEN THIS THREAD

[@buddyart-]

You posted this when I woke up, I'm a bit mad

[@alecdickens1042]

Seymour.......have you ever had these? You sound like a man who sympathizes with that review.

[@smilesthroughfandoms5595]

I never really liked Gummy Bears. The flavors, the texture, it’s just not something I enjoy. This review solidified my enjoyment of simpler candies like M&M’s, Starburst, or just a god-dammed candy bar.

[@ast5368]

Oh Ohohoho THESE reviews. Ive heard of them before Time to sit my ass down and see this

[@arterialfirerose4659]

Well found a prune replacement lmao

[@GigaLem]

what did they put inside these things?!

[@rachaelhatton5960]

I love the video Seymour

[@1udontno]

I just watched the beginning. What am I getting into?

[@kellenliame2674]

Yeah the shit in sugar free candy is actually way worse for your body than normal sugar. Usually it will send you into a night long bout of treading the carpet to and from the toilet and bedroom. My friend accidentally ate a pound of gummy bears I got him, thinking they weren’t sugar free. We didn’t stay friends much longer

[@tommyzheng9940]

Moral of the story: Being obese and eating sugar is safer then being on a diet and healthy

[@mist-rulan1931]

thank you so much oh my god

[@Eternal-fractal]

*WHERE'S THE LINK TO BUY THESE.*

[@IrishKeshiHead]

I knew you would do this type of review.

[@thekrakenexperiment280]

Please do a video on the amazon reviews for the Samsung UN85S9 Framed 85-Inch 4K Ultra HD 3D Smart LED TV. That may sound weird, but trust me, it's worth it.

[@laurelcook9078]

They discontinued these because the fda cracked down on it lol