Why You Are Always Unhappy

[@whodafokisdisguy5851]

This was my Reddit post. I’m beyond grateful and a bit shook at the response from Dr K. I’m still currently trying to process my realizations from this response but I never believed that I had an ego problem. I feel as if though my own beliefs on myself have been completely delusional. I genuinely thought of myself as a humble person but I now see that everything I do and have done has been in the name of my ego and need to feel better…. I just want to say thank you, I need more time to process more of this and digest it but now I have a road paved that I can follow.

[@EhrenmannHenno7469]

Good luck on your ways

[@Trinity_505]

If you don’t mind me asking, do you feel you’ve been pushed towards this high achieving mindset? Parents, peer pressure, overcompensating, anything like that?

[@whodafokisdisguy5851]

@@Trinity_505 that’s something I’m thinking about right now. My parents were very loving and good parents growing up. They never told me I needed to be good at something and were always supportive. However if I look back on it, I was definitely the black sheep of the family. Both of my brothers were 4.0 GPA student who got scholarships to colleges. I never had good grades however I did Test well.

[@joelman1989]

Great question! I learned so much from this as well as a result of you asking that question.

[@berniesilvamusic]

I'm 3 mins into this video and I feel like this is gonna hit home really fucking hard.

[@Rhea1381]

"Ego has survival utility but it doesn't have happiness utility. Everyone is looking for happiness using an instrument that was designed for survival. That's why it's hard." Holy shit. Yeah.

[@Kryptdegen]

Was it Schopenhauer or kierkegaard that said we shouldn't chase happiness and chasing happiness will only lead to making it harder to attain?

[@idrinkwater1124]

@hemsley4750 idk, but I know that Nietzsche also said that you shouldn't directly strive for happiness. That happiness is the by-product of overcoming adversity or doing a certain activity

[@vivianleenet]

This entire channel is basically just reading my mind. I feel both attacked and very validated.

[@DropIt56]

Not sure how long you’ve been following his content, but I started watching back in May and felt the same. The more I watched, the more I felt exposed but not alone in my struggles, and now I’ve been a coaching client for almost two months 🙌

[@Ouaueaio]

@@DropIt56 How is your coaching experience so far? I've been thinking in applying too

[@peacebuddha96]

Maybe we are all the same

[@pinkierandom]

@peacebuddha96 probably, I have never found a channel I can relate so much

[@czr.]

Since little, I knew conforming to the norms would get me by. So I never learned to make an effort to apply myself/take care of my needs. Through therapy I learned that it came from trauma - I had the inability to let myself enjoy/be happy. It is still very hard but I am getting better through practice. Good luck guys!

[@covvardice8296]

I have this problem as well and have no idea how or where to get started. I’m stuck in knowing/overthinking/analysis-paralysis. I’m also afflicted with adhd and bpd. What helped you allow yourself to love yourself?

[@czr.]

@@covvardice8296 I had to try many things but ultimately it was a combination of months of therapy, anti-depressants, and meditation. Therapy helped me get to the root of the trauma which helped me get started on an emotional healing journey. Anti-depressants helped my mood, energy, and focus. And meditation is helping me learn how to deal with negative emotions/thoughts. Most of the time those negative emotions/thoughts are really someone else's voice - who is actually the person that introduced these thoughts into your head? I would write down what are the most valuable things in your life/what are the things that would make you happy but take all the critics/negative voices out of your head. Then work towards making your life meet your needs. Hope that helps, gl.

[@covvardice8296]

@@czr. thank you, I really appreciate the response as well as contextualizing what worked for you. I struggle massively with memory lapses that makes understanding the roots of trauma a lot harder, and my adhd keeps me impulsively living stuck like this even though I feel like I understand what I need to do, and I never think or am able to execute on that. It’s always the negative. Your healing greatly inspires me, thank you again for your response.

[@frostedlambs]

How do you learn trauma? It’s not like false memory implanting is it?

[@Peanuts76]

this valuable life experience you have, thank you for sharing this, as this is what i need to learn to dealing with my depression and trauma.... as i think i try so hard to conform to other needs, leaving my needs and and my happiness, no wonder I'm easily sad and stressed out, i left, lost and even criticize myself harshly, instead of focusing what best and what things that brings joy and fulfillment to me....

[@yayinhard]

"Veteran" meditator here. For years I couldn't put it into words even though I experienced both the ego chase and the shunya. To balance between detachment and strive for success was the hardest thing to do for me so far. Once you get there it's really easy to see how we're not designed to be happy in the first place. Two things that often help me to keep the balance are 1) pain from ego is the price I pay for existing 2) I can still get that null bliss from dharma and through meditations. Thank you Dr K, deeply grateful for the knowledge I got today.

[@neropanda2646]

Can I ask how you got to where you are? I'm essentially asking whether there were any people like Dr K or general "resources" that helped you, it might be a stupid question but I really don't know

[@yayinhard]

@@neropanda2646 hi! Happy to answer any questions. I got into esoterics and buddhism just out of curiosity, started practicing what I was reading about. I got better mentally and continued. Tbh it felt like doing magic back then, there was almost no connection between eastern practices and western science. In that sense, Dr K is a pioneer and deserves every bit of success he gets. I have a list of books I did read at that time, lmk if you want it.

[@moonrose100]

Love that: "We're designed for survival not happiness."

[@SimGunther]

"Addiction to the grind" is an accurate way to put it. Without an internal sense of why you're making that progress to improve your inner self and your connection with the Cosmos, you'll never truly disconnect from the ego and external pressures that stress us out as they eventually scare you out of living your life.

[@ilovesalmon215]

so do lsd and shrooms?

[@SomeGuyHowGoesIt]

@@ilovesalmon215 that could help

[@Zb_Calisthenic]

That's why instruments are awesome hobbies. Longgg grind

[@anty.]

I think the issue that i have is that external pressures have stressed me out and already scared me out of living life, and I've never even had a phase of being addicted to the grind. its hard for me to grind because i think ive always equated grinding with boredom, more than the future positive outcomes from it

[@pudelmuetz1]

this "hits the nail on the head" for me, thank you for that comment

[@tckswordscar]

This was probably my favorite content so far, as I consistently battle with how much of my ego should I let live, and how much I want to be a part of the ego driven world we live in. It is both very liberating and also terrifying to sit still and be quiet in the world. On one hand, I truly feel peaceful, but on the other hand, I am letting my precious life slip by, and not experiencing potential life changing moments. Those moments tend to become both joyful and sorrowful experiences. The joyful times typically "feel better" than peaceful times, but I don't know if they are worth the cost of living through the painful times.

[@areare3990]

Should we play safe in hopes for a peaceful life free from stress and troubles or an "adventurous" blood pumping life that gives us more happiness and joy but also sadness and problems?

[@movement2contact]

@@areare3990 It's not how world or life are...

[@GhostlyNomad130]

These are not mutually exclusive Save States. You can live a adventurous and fulfilling life for yourself And enjoy peoples company. If you feel like your not living your life to the fullest it's probably because your holding yourself back. Don't hold your breath friend, let it flow naturally to and from you

[@yayinhard]

I get what you mean. I try to see it more as a balance rather than a consistent battle though

[@tckswordscar]

@@GhostlyNomad130 I think peace and joy are mutually exclusive attributes, but I don't believe that a person's life can't have both within it. However, you can't be experiencing both of those states of mind at the same time. Much like the question Dr. k received, does he still experience suffering of the ego (paraphrasing). His response reveals some of the truth about these qualities. He sighs and thinks about it and says yes, he still suffers because he chose not to become a monk, and accepts that suffering as a consequence of not being a monk. It isn't that being a monk means you don't suffer, what he really is trying to express is that being a monk means to strive for peace over fulfillment (loss of ego), and by not being a monk, he allows his ego to become active at times he would prefer it doesn't, which causes him to suff periodically. That is a choice everyone faces, whether they understand it or not. To choose peace is to give up on the ego, and to give up on the ego is to no longer experience attachment. To not experience attachment causes one to never suffer again, but it also means that you won't chase after the"highs" of life any longer. By not chasing after the highs of life, naturally one would miss out on many opportunities in the world of the ego.

[@wanderingrandomer]

These posts always seem to start out sounding quite sensational and then slowly becoming more relatable to me. I empathise with getting really good (or at least passable) at something with minimal effort, but once further improvement starts to get hard and require actual active focus rather than autopilot, I move onto something else. I definitely fall into the category of not really having a "passion" for anything that drives me (I would cynically site "consuming media" as my passion). I have never had the experience of 'chasing a dream' and achieving anything great in my life in that sense, and the desire to do so has been one of the hardest parts of me to let go.

[@niceteal]

"Some of you are gonna be feeling bad and some of you are gonna be feeling chad" actually giggled out loud at that surprise line. gonna quote that for the rest of my life.

[@tekiero]

what time pls

[@kikijewell2967]

45:00 Sneaky ego - feeling bad/Chad ❤

[@kikijewell2967]

"You've moved away from shunya if you're feeling bad. And you've moved away from shunya if you're feeling Chad." :)

[@Trinity_505]

The more I think about issues talked about on this channel, the more I realize nearly everything comes down to self love, and genuine love/dharma. When those two align, damn that’s special.

[@EhrenmannHenno7469]

I agree. Selflove is one of the (if not the) highest teachings in existence.

[@MsSomeonenew]

Well self love will keep you sane on this road, but waaay down the road there are other revelations.

[@Trinity_505]

@@MsSomeonenew such as? it sounds you've been on quite the journey and would love to hear your insights if you don't mind sharing

[@yayinhard]

@@Trinity_505 such as experiencing the void, I assume. As Dr K stated its quite a challenge to keep your regular existence after you see the null everywhere around you. Self love can keep you sane and healthy, dharma can give you some sense of meaning, but after all you'll have to accept your inevitable pain that comes with ego

[@mariomeza3514]

I've been studying spirituality for a few years. While I still have a lot to learn I've picked up a few things. The ultimate revelation IS Love, not just self-love, but pure Love itself that encompasses all that is. This Love is with a capital "L" because its from the absolute level (God), and not the humanistic relative level, which would be with a lowercase "l". And yes "all that is" even includes all the things that you would consider bad in life. Because there really is no good or bad in life, everything just IS, or in a constant state of IS'ing/being. To reach this state of all-encompassing and unconditional Love, you must let go of everything, and I mean literally everything. All your thoughts, all your beliefs (even spiritual), religion, all your values, your identity, if you have any teachers that are teaching you this spiritual path eventually let go of them also, all your desires (including reaching enlightenment which is an oxymoron), your culture, everything you like and don't like, money/jobs and whatever else, your will to live, and even let go of your family and loved ones which at this point is where most people fail. Once you reach a state of no-mind/no thought, stay in that state, and also deconstruct the rest of your reality, the ego dissolves, enlightenment happens, and all suffering ends at that point. You can finally be at peace for the rest of eternity as your reincarnation cycle ends (there's no more karma left for you to burn off).

[@achinthmurali5207]

Came for the thumbnail, stayed for the lecture. Thank you Dr. K

[@phoenix_the_fox]

the video came out like 2 seconds before you posted this comment LOL

[@fillo9873]

Same

[@achinthmurali5207]

@@phoenix_the_fox I got a notification that showed the thumbnail. I posted this comment early so people could see it first and then it wouldn’t get lost with the rest.

[@matheuswohl]

youtube done right

[@polarisraven5613]

Is that Hiro (thumbnail) or am I mistaken?

[@ronaldinho4eva1]

You're my quasi-therapist for real. Really appreciate you and your thoughts. Thank you Dr. K!

[@thelordofducks3496]

holy cow, the second part of the video (post-meditation) should really be a clip of its own, the insights are spot-on

[@flipflopflapjack]

Thank you so so much. I am an archer and have been struggling for years with my shooting. It is a very mental sport and my mind has been what had been holding me back for most of my time shooting. Two days ago, after watching this video and doing the shunya meditation, I shot a personal best for the first time in two years and shot some of the best arrows I’ve ever shot. I did this by focusing on the ‘black box’ while shooting. I’ve got a long way to go with it but the success ive had so far is amazing (ironic as that’s entirely my ego talking)

[@RainwriterMusic]

Dr. K is so smart. Like, I can't believe he read this post and broke down this person's mindset in this way with such ease. I wouldn't have been able to figure that out, so simply.

[@nicopaduamusic]

Dang man that whole post is literally my life. I powerlifted, started hating, one tricked zed almost into plat then quit and now I have existential dread

[@DHDtroll]

The meditation here scared the shit out of me to be honest. This was the first meditation that I actually felt that “no mind state.” And I could feel the “void.” Other meditations never really did much for me, but this one was freaky as hell.

[@tekiero]

how to achieve that

[@SnailHatan]

@@tekieroby doing it.

[@millerrepin4452]

@@tekiero Figure out where your nerve endings well end then focus on that part. If you are familiar with hypnosis then you'll be used to hyper focus. It's really that simple hyper focus on where you can't feel in your body then you did it.

[@AndPennyThought]

Holy crap; this meditation is similar to the one I was taught. I hadn't really had the words to describe why all of sudden I felt like many things "don't matter" all of a sudden - but like not in a bad way?

[@elektrotehnik94]

You're doing it right

[@flavafee]

Yeah in another of Dr K's videos he talks about how releasing your attachments to things can feel like that. What's surprising is you can still care about things without being attached to them. And you don't lose your motivation to work toward the things you care about; in fact your capability to do so increases

[@elektrotehnik94]

@@flavafee Indeed. From experience so far I'd say I become unbound from "what-if"-'s & past pains, got much more joy & focus my life into what I think actually matters

[@christianrudder4826]

I'm so comfortable with my ego, and it has brought me much happiness, but at the same time it hasn't. Sometimes I feel like absolute garbage, but I'm ok with that, I'm more comfortable with that, than being happy. Being happy at times feels wrong almost, as if that's not me. Then I hit these places of rock bottom, and once I hit rock bottom I have a come back arc, and once I've finally bounced back, I slowly go back down to rock bottom, then bounce back, over and over. The stress and anxiety pushes me forward. I feel as if I let go of my ego, is like going to another school, with a different family, different friends, different culture, and different body. But honestly, these ups and downs have become more and more frequent. It's just alternating days at this point, one day I hit rock bottom, the next I hit the top, and then for me to hit the top again, I have to feel like garbage the next day. I never have a constant stream of happiness, I need to constantly live in chaos.

[@isaaccardin]

"Progressium"... brilliant. I have been a progressium addict for a long time but the addiction is going away the more I meditate and learn self acceptance.

[@perfectionprogression4151]

Im gonna push this phrase hard

[@alexzan1858]

Damn... this is one of the most insightful lessons Ive learned so far (I havent watched all for sure). The ego think makes so much sense. Some of my university teachers in physics have been very shit in teaching, and now that I think about it, it must be because of their ego - theyll rather do it half assedly than actually try and not be good at it. My unhappiness has similarly been because Ive been comparing myself to people who have succeeded earlier than me instead of just focusing on bettering myself.

[@superbbackhand180]

This was interesting, I identified the void as the things I chase, because it's the void I try to fill with externalities by chasing things. I never knew it was there but I was trying to fill it nonetheless. Since the void is impossible to fill because it will always be a void it gave me good perspective on why those pursuits were futile in accomplishing that task and instead resulted in demoralization of further attempts to fill the void. It is not something I can fill and I must accept that, which in turn brings me happiness with my acceptance of the truth. I hope this doesn't become one of those things I forget by tomorrow and continue diving into, it was very enlightening on my spiritual subconscious motivations.

[@tiramiseratops]

I think something that's interesting for me is when i notice the void it really scares me, but then if i dive deeper into it instead of running away from the sight of it, i start to realize that we attach negative connotations to things like "the void" and "nothing" and "emptiness" and then respond accordingly to those negative connotations (or at least i do) instead of taking them for what they are and realizing that they aren't inherently bad and that we've literally been scared of nothing.

[@siouxsietea6147]

​@@tiramiseratopswow! What an excellent remark. I have never thought of my existential worries this way. Thank you

[@tiramiseratops]

@@siouxsietea6147 of course! glad I could help :)

[@breadboigaming7420]

I use to watch you often and I really liked your content, but somewhere along the way I slowly consumed your content less and less. I recently enrolled in a Yoga Instructor training program and your videos popped back up on my recommended, so I started watching again. What I didn’t realize before, but it’s become so abundantly clear now, is how much you incorporate the practices of Yoga into your practice! And I really dig it! And I understand the concepts you bring up because I’ve now learned about many of them, so it’s really fun for me to hear your say something like “mudra” or “samadhi” and geek out like “OH I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!!”

[@KroBlan]

Iu je j’y hé je n je

[@F8TVOfficial]

I just benefited from that immensely. Thank you so much, the moment I felt my inner block i almost cried, the fear, the death of ego, if this retreat happens i would love to be there. I’ve been following for years and I’ll do anything to be apart of such an amazing experience

[@autumn_vasch]

I really loved this meditation. Also when you guys plan a retreat don't leave out people who can only watch on youtube. I can never watch stream because it's during my work hours but I am always here on YT.

[@fghsgh]

I am new here, and I want to try this meditation stuff for real. A lot of issues described here on this channel are things I have noticed about myself and I want to work on. And I'm afraid these "advanced meditations" won't be available when I will eventually have caught up.

[@gameologian7365]

He gotta start playing fighting games, he won't ever get to the top and can keep staying competitive

[@neuralsixty3852]

I fully agree - plus the fact that fighting games are 1v1, so everything that he does reflects right back onto him, and he'll have no choice but to take a good look at himself.

[@VarietyFox420]

But you see, that's exactly the reason why this person won't like fighting games. They're addicted to the feeling of progression, of being a "fast learner", not from a feeling of mastery. If you put them in with a bunch of other people who are just as competent as they are, then they're not going to enjoy it at all. I mean, you can kind of see it from their post too. Why did they stop at plat instead of challenger? Why did they stop at their local gym instead of going to the national level? Because at some point they start playing with people at their own level, and then the thing stop becoming fun.

[@Balloonbot]

Why can't that happen in League? Unless you're in the habit of blaming your team - there's always gonna be someone better than you.

[@bobobsen]

@@VarietyFox420 becoming the strongest guy in a gym is significantly harder than becoming good at fighting games tho. Different if we're talking about professional levels of course.

[@2Grills1Kappa]

@@bobobsen It depends on who you are comparing yourself against which is the fundamental problem talked about in this video. What if the gym doesn't have a lot of strong people, so it's easier to reach the top? Being at the top doesn't say anything about your actual strength.

[@JaxsonGalaxy]

Shunya. That's a word I've been looking for a long time. For me a huge part of Dr. K's lessons is naming things I understand, but can't communicate without paragraphs of words. I would love to speak with Dr. K, on stream sometime. I hope my application is received well.

[@mrdasjo]

This was actually one of my favorite meditations (so far). I felt a sense of inner peace; it's almost like calmly drifting through space.

[@hootiehoo3000]

Dr. K, please do more content like this. Its genuinely spiritually fulfilling to have a reminder about what impacts our daily lives.

[@mattschke]

This meditation practice was impressive. Thank you so much for your work Dr. K

[@shinywave]

Thank you for getting me to ask myself the important question of “how can I feel nothing?” Incredibly helpful. Ive always found a comfort in the void and imagining things as not real, but I was never sure if this was “healthy”. This has helped me make some sense of it.

[@DalCecilRuno]

38:02 OMG! Thank you so much! Thank you for saying it so straight to the point.

[@jackyinhere]

Shoonya felt like I am meeting an old friend that I haven't seen in a while, when i reached there I smiled and almost had tears. It felt like when I was writing my diary putting down everything without judgment. it felt like a space that I always aspire to go to whenever I'm faced with any difficult in life.

[@christiandiaz]

For the person who asked about how to balance the ego with spirituality, I find that working on balancing the chakras helps. The lower 3 chakras are rooted in the ego and deal with our relationship with our physical reality, with ourselves and with other people. They are typically thrown out of balances by experiences we deal with in our everyday lives. The higher 3 chakras are the more spiritual energy centers and are rooted in our spirituality and dealt without relationship to anyone or anything but the true essence of being (the void, nullness that Dr K. mentions or the inner voice talked about in the bible) essentially, that sense of knowing that can't be explained logically. The heart chakra is special and it's sort of a transition from ego to spiruality and acts as sort of a spring board to the higher 3 energy centers, but arguably the most difficult to work with. If you want to live a balanced life, without delving too much into ego or spirituality, work on balancing all the energy centers.

[@gorrino4479]

Hey Dr.K! Thanks for putting this into words and introducing these concepts onto me. I had a mild mushroom experience in which I think I experienced Shoonya within myself, infinite empty hole inside me, not in a bad way but not in a good way either. Now I can meditate on this concept beacuse I know its important, probably that experience was leading me down this path but knowing that yogi people have already cracked it all up makes it so much easyer, gotta read more!

[@heyqt7485]

This is one of the best channels I've come across on twitch and youtube. Thank you so much for doing this and thank you so much for genuinly caring and talking about this.

[@bassstellar]

Wow, the meditation. I tried it and it legit worked. Unbelievable feeling. I felt something switch on in my mind. Then when Dr K said to come back to the external, I got overwhelmed with emotion. Something felt like it got released? It made tear up. That was unbelievable.

[@wizerd432]

37:28 When he talked about using spirituality as a means to an end that really hit me… Makes so much sense

[@ivanljujic4128]

I did shoonya for the first time now and I felt it. I sorta didn't want to come back from the practice. It was so peaceful. Weird, never had that happen during meditation even though I already had nice experiences with meditation. I underatand detachment now, like dr K said, but I also don't want to to be detached from people I love and feelings related to them, even if negative. I sorta choose to be attached.

[@Ava-sw2bn]

Wow I was walking to school this morning (which is now lol) thinking why do I keep crying? Why am I so sad? And here you go dropping a video to help me understand literally the same day 🥺 thank you Dr. k

[@bobobsen]

Sadge

[@SukottoX]

Sadge

[@arandompersonlol1202]

Sadge

[@izio1111]

3 years ago I had to drop out of year 10 because I got really depressed so I kind of feel that sad walk to school

[@kuri_ken]

His last statements threw me for a loop: “The real goal is not to get rid of your ego, it’s to be in control your ego.” Isn’t this desire to be in control of one’s ego in itself, egoic? Is this where the concept of superego comes into play? How does being in control of one’s ego relate to the acceptance of Shunya? 🤔

[@mq9demo]

Because you can accept both Shunya and ego.

[@cavemann_]

@@mq9demo What does it *mean* to accept?

[@mq9demo]

@@cavemann_ to be at peace with it, to sit with it.

[@JingyuanLi-f2l]

The goal is to control ego, but perhaps the goal is not exactly the same thing as desire. One can pursue a goal as a temporary edict, a practice, an experiment, or a regime of exercises. Desire may or may not get involved, since in meditation, desires ideally are noticed and observed. (Desires do not 'necessarily' control the pracrice and mere act of controlling ego.) Is the control of ego intrinsically egoic? I think it has to be (regrettably) because the control of ego still assumes the existence of ego and refers to ego. This assumption, however, describes a lot of people's real experiences, so a dharmic practice (Hindu, Jain, Buddhist, etc), to be maximally effective, meets people where they are. So we start from egoic practices, graduating to more non-egoic practices, and then to practices of anatman (no self) in Buddhism. As u expected, future less egoic and non-egoic practices would deny parts of the old egoic practices, as more truths are revealed. Like how proverbially speaking, high-school level math is forgotten in learning college level math. The existence of self (atman) is preserved in Hinduism, but the existence of ego (ahamkara), i think, is negated. I think this is the big picture, but I am sure I am wrong in the details and accuracy.

[@MalformedNPC]

Build yourself up, work hard, and be passionate about life until it becomes routine and feels pointless to even get out of bed. Self-sabotage rolls in. Quit job, start drinking again, smoke all the weeds, play videogames and chat on discord all day. Being this low feels shitty so build yourself up, work hard, and be passionate about life until...

[@M0r1tz02]

video already in watch later, thank you really much for your videos (and podcast), love it!

[@harmoen]

When I close my eyes I can still sense my room around me. Not because I can see it or feel it in any way, but just because I think that it's there.

[@doomsday437]

Literally just descovered this channel and watched 2 1 hour videos and as soon as it's over this is uploaded... Perfect timing

[@mazen2940]

Thank you very much. I've been wanting to learn shoonya for a year now with no resources I could find. This practice is truly transformational

[@donvo2163]

Shoonya is such a bizarre experience. I've quite regularly sat down and let myself feel myself feel the natural sensations of the body like the first half of the meditation. However, I never would have expected to reach a point where there were no internal sensations at that core. I had to feel myself around the area which, was around the upper part of the sternum for me, just to verify it and while I could feel those sensations it was as if the sensation mostly wrapped around that void. Whatever few sensations that went through the void I could feel just before they entered but then it was lost and suddenly reappeared out the other side. Was kind of off-putting the first time, but then I tried it again and focused the internal sensations around that empty core and was like "let go" and proceeded to drop into a that metaphorical pit. I can tell why he used the word dissolve for ego, because it really does feel like those internal sensations fizzle outward as they disappear. Even some subconscious things I wasn't even attending to like the forehead strain and keeping my arms up was caught in the dissipation. Was a familiar experience, but it usually took a much longer time to reach than it did from this meditation. Definitely great that this experience was highlighted. Being able to feel this is really cleansing and helps me be comfortable with myself. Don't need to think about wants or needs cause I'm just chillin' in this pit.

[@tekiero]

you can’t touch your inner organs. Obviously there will be a void. Is that a shunya?

[@AnarchyIsLove]

Gonna have to run this one a few times. Wonderful

[@jfp521]

The meditation practice actually freaked me out, what an experience. I have always been an avid meditator but that type of meditation was something entirely different and new for me

[@kokujinblack77]

That shoonya stuff blew my mind! It's scary and exciting at the same time.

[@kikijewell2967]

I'm realizing that Enlightenment stuff isn't like a journey, where the goal is far away and you have to make progress to get there. It's more like being blind and feeling around in the vast darkness. Enlightenment is always _right there_ for you to find it. You can even recoil from it and ignore it. But it's always right there.

[@Roca891]

I’m not a doctor, but let me propose an alternative explanation from my own experience. I like trying new things. The novelty of learning something new, and gaining skill rapidly is very exciting to me in the beginning and I don’t feel like this part is a grind. It’s once you get pretty good at something that it becomes grindy. For me I think it’s the serotonin hit I get in the early part of learning that keeps me Interested. But once you get to the grindy part, the repetitive practice or acquiring of higher level skills that it starts to become dull for me. I don’t think this is an ego issue. Laziness maybe. I do the same with games. They’re really fun in the beginning, but once I start having to perform the same tasks over and over, that’s usually when I stop and try a new game. It’s really unfortunate how this carries over in real life though. I’ve learned a lot of interesting skills but never really stuck with anything long enough to read the highest benefits because they get boring for me.

[@debutchi]

I struggle with this, I wouldn’t call it laziness though it’s really just craving the excitement of novelty because the chemical hit u get is much higher and quicker than focusing on working hard to fix harder issues, takes a lot of discipline to sit yourself down and not allow your brain’s cravings to be in control

[@mcmeyer76]

This is the piece I was missing, to take the next step. Thank you for putting out into the world in your own signature way, for us to find.

[@neelmehta9092]

I just want to journal a bit here because this blew my mind. I saw the emptiness of my existence, how quiet life is. I cannot describe what I felt, it was a fleeting feeling, the first time I felt it I was so scared, terrified on how lonely it is. I cannot describe it to anyone, I never want to leave this feeling. I saw how egotistical my dad is, how I am, how ego is the root of unhappiness. How my dad is wasting his life, how I am wasting my life and yet even though this is an extremely negative thought, I feel content. I feel content because nothing matters, everything is a void of emotions, all anxieties worries all are sucked into this black box of being. everything is being sucked into this black hole, in a literal sense, I felt everything being sucked into nothingness, being sucked into a void and yet I feel content.

[@tekiero]

How is your dad’s ego appears in real life? What actions he took under ego u think?

[@tekiero]

and what do you mean by wasting life cause of ego? Why life wasted if you happy?

[@jludwig5374]

"Wanting to be the best, fundamentally, causes you to lose control over your life" 16:06 another banger 🔥

[@matheuswohl]

this shoonya meditation thing... I get the sense that if you're constantly aware of it the likeliness of you experiencing a lucid dream increases because it's easier to notice that the "reality" around is less "real" when you're dreaming

[@raghavmohan3512]

What an amazing technique, thanks Dr K for introducing it to us. For those who couldn't do Shoonya, please don't be discouraged! Its highly advanced but there is a way to get there, keep researching more about it and practicing🙏

[@onigirls]

When he called people out for comparing themselves after the meditation section I really felt that. I did feel bad that it didn't speak to me at all. If anyone has any healthygamer videos they'd recommend for specifically ego/comparison/worth issues I'd really appreciate it. This was the vid that was most targeted from everything I've watched but I never really resonate with the spiritual approach to things. When he talks about neuroscience, psychology and behaviour it's super helpful though :

[@cricket91181]

Thank you Dr. K! I have this very same situation. I saw and felt the void during the guided meditation. I can now see "the nothing" all around. I know I'm dating myself be saying this but maybe there are some 40yr olds that watch this channel? It feels a little like the anticipation of"the nothing" from The Never Ending Story". Everything is unstable and yes there is freedom but its disorienting. Feeling it in myself and around me has relieved the steady ache of finding my next goal to charge at. I'm totally content standing still...its crazy!! Thank you thank you. I will use this in the future for sure! I was getting ready to withdraw from renewing a 2 yr term commitment and now I'm reconsidering filling that position. Without all the stress that come from comparing and grinding my way to find more meaning or to be better than....it seems doable!

[@hazzer2k10]

That brief mediation was tripped out literally felt like I was in a massive void and I was the smallest “entity” was pretty scary ngl but enjoyable at the same time it was an experience I’ve never felt

[@icaruscantfly9762]

This was amazing thanks for this!

[@mathew6639]

This is probably the most significant video from Dr. K (for myself) yet.

[@krzysztofkulpa3465]

this video is so good! it's part of my daily routine now xD

[@ericdoeslife]

Thank you Dr. K ❤️

[@KeatenRussell]

Thanks Dr.K, this segment has changed my perspective on life entirely.

[@jludwig5374]

This channel is truly a light in our dark times. Thank you

[@RahulSharma-ot3wo]

This video hits personal

[@BelMisi3000]

me, while doing the meditation: "hmm, can I feel my liver? I don't know if I'm feeling my liver or if I'm really feeling nothing"

[@mellowmike6263]

I've been meditating for a while now and that "Nothingness" meditation was really unique and novel to me, I've recently been reading "Being & Nothingness" by Sartre and he asserts that there is a nothingness at the core of being, something I could just about conceptually get my head around. But I just partially felt it, it feels so validating and that helps me integrate this into my emotions. I'm super grateful for Dr K doing this kind of meaningful work here, he's honestly helped me so much.

[@farahmaswadeh6245]

that meditation was amazing!!!

[@Обалдемон]

WOW, thanks for this

[@remitiras]

I think the bus isn't the best place for guided meditation, but that was a really nice surprise to experience during a random video I opened to listen to in the background while trying to relax XD

[@MutedSage69]

I have never been able to see life from not behind my eyes until now it was like an out of body experience and now I can't go back to how I used to see things and it's rough.

[@Dememonigote]

I quit because I dont get fullfilled while improving, nor when i reached my goals, at that point I dont see reason to keep trying. And no matter what I do, it's always the same. I dont care about reaching the goals i set for myself, they mean nothing if i dont have anyone that i care for to share with.

[@vivvy_0]

yes

[@jonnyrawket8158]

This and so many videos on the channel hit hard. I went to school on a med path, switched to Psych BA when I realized I didn’t wanna be a doctor, I’m graduating in a week, and I don’t know where to go next. I don’t want to go back to uni for another bachelors, and I’ve considered a graduate degree in forensic psych, but where do I even go from there if I have ZERO idea of what to do now. I was a pretty meh student but I made it. I work out, go to church, try to participate in community activities but at the end of the day I’m directionless. I have no friends because I know I barely try to. I’m just discontent and spend my days on the computer researching things I think will make me happy or economically secure… :/

[@CodySchmitt]

Oh hey, it's my exact clone lmao

[@pipeh-2688]

Same here, at least we're not alone

[@di3486]

You have to find out if you really love this. Graduate school is hard and you should do it only if makes you feel alive.

[@areare3990]

Generation of lost people that's walking in the dark alone not knowing what awaits for them i the future. Yeah right life is so simple it makes me want to just vanish and f**cking die, hard times indeed

[@travisdurrans8866]

The struggle you currently face is the decision to either follow the devil you know, or the angel you've never met. The leap of faith to pursue what is actually meaningful to you instead of continuing the path you're currently walking is the most difficult decision you will face in life, and it is currently calling you to decide. You are all in my prayers, I know God will help us eventually reach the path of meaning.

[@JiangBao7]

I find myself always practice the Shoonya and reconize it between the rabbit, I know how to just to let go, just don't care and everything that is happen it's not about you it's just your ego (your desire and self-esteem in the way). I was feeling that thing is easy to learn and i'm get bored easily too, It's true about not comparing with other and to think what's motivate you, this video is just the truth and it make you strong any aspect, the meditate part is so amazing that I can't stop smiling after I come back, because I meditate all the time (to have awareness and be calm like a cold thinking robot), and I love to just get along with myself, just to chill out and do nothing, so the whole meditate part is easy to me and very very useful to go deeper. I wanna help translate this video into chinese so I can share it with the people that I loved, please authorize me to add subtitle to this video

[@lakeberg5102]

Why do you want to be a cold thinking robot? My experience is the opposite, warm and brilliant went it goes well.

[@JiangBao7]

@@lakeberg5102 it just mean that I erase my ego as much as possible and just to think what's really matter and really happening rather than listen to the rabbit. I meditate to be calm and free, and that make me warm and brilliant too.

[@alfredhitchcock45]

Energy, duality, shunya - OM Fundamental vibration of existence Sensory organs are entry point That which you touch is not part of you Sensory apparatus - ears - hearing Sense of touch - you feel you touching the table - tactile sensors Mudra Fingers and hand Proprioceptive sense You can tell where you are in your sense of space You know where your body is You know where your hands are Forearms exist, elbow Signals body is sending you Shunya is everywhere Maya or illusion Reality is false None of this crap is real Everything that bothers you no longer bothers you Samadhi Freedom - bliss Knowledge, freedom, happiness Ego wants to control Detach Nature of attachment Too detached Hijacking spirituality for its false material ends Ego shackles us Ego is universal experience Chase for success Ego helps us survive Construction of egotistical mind Retreat

[@YungJuve]

Even before watching Dr.K's assessment, I can tell this guy is addicted to making the easy progress, going after the lowest hanging fruits, and quitting once the going gets actually tough. Look at the specific figures - 100k salary, strongest guy at his local gym, diamond - these are all very much on the very right side distribution on their respective scales, but nowhere close to the TOP of the TOP. The way that things work in life is, the law of diminishing returns hits hard once we get to a certain part along the process for ANYTHING. It's actually much easier to go from Bronze to Diamond in LOL than to go from Diamond to Challenger / Grand Master. It's relatively easy to become the strongest person in your local gym than compared to becoming a powerlifting champion of your weight class / region (depends a lot on where you live - imagine living in Texas lmao, being the strongest in any weight class in TX would be a huge feat). So while this person may think he's tried hard enough and accomplished a lot and can't seemingly figure out why he loses interest past a certain point - I'd argue it's because you are not ready to step up to the next gear and REALLY go for something with all his heart. He's just figured out a way to fast-track himself to like 80-90th percentile of the distribution, but isn't willing to go from there to the 95-99th percentile. I've seen too many people around me fall into this category, actually. A lot of my peers in college were like - I got to so-and-so school, I'm done, and outright stop their academic pursuits right there then. I have friends who habitually switch out hobbies after getting decently good at them (let's say close to the top 10% of the participants), because they get "bored." Such "condition" is common amongst people with decently high aptitude for things who get conditioned to living the life on the easy mode. And yes, I was and in some ways, still am very much like this. Ultimately, it's up to you to realize that there are LEVELs to everything, and pick out things you really wanna go all the way with, and familiarizing yourself with the grind and delayed gratification.

[@syncopatedglory]

sounds like you're addicted to the grind tbh, maybe even very ego-driven. without knowing your friends it's impossible for us to know whether you're just judging them for having hobbies that change instead of going pro in everything they do, lol. the real question is whether they're content or not. if they aren't, that's an issue, but no one has to reach your idea of "their" potential.

[@YungJuve]

@@syncopatedglory I wouldn't say I'm addicted to the grind - but then, every addict would deny their addiction haha. Definitely to a degree - although I am / was completely fine being a total degenerate for an extended period of time. And of course, I'm ego-driven when it comes to career goals and to a lesser extent, to hobbies. If life was an RPG, I def like collecting shiny rare items and obtaining cool titles. And then, when I'm not playing it, I just laugh at myself for being so obsessed with things that are so arbitrary. Eh, that's life. I'm fine with that reality. My main point in the original comment is - whatever threshold you set for "good enough" is definitely subjective, although there's this objective reality to the levels of competency when we look at the groups of people. Furthermore, the choice is up to an individual to be satisfied with 90% progress in multiple games, or choose to embark on that long, arduous journey to reach that ever-so elusive 100% completion on a few. It seems like the redditor wasn't content with the former option, so I proposed an alternative. To each his own.

[@Kunzopolis]

the bit at the end about how the human body and brain are designed for survival -- not for happiness -- is absolutely fucking profound and i never thought about it that way

[@ryankelly8428]

Thank you for this Doctor K. "shunya" is putting a name to something I've been feeling in meditation for a little while now, I just thought it was a natural thing to occur with meditation.

[@SimplePixelLofi]

This post is literally what I've been dealing with this week, I even thought about posting it on the subreddit today and this comes up. No i'm not crying, you're crying.

[@5701mari]

I really appreciate the perspective that Dr.K has

[@Uncleanwiener1231]

Video basically gave me a spiritual awakening

[@TheBswan]

The bit around 38:00 when Dr. K talks about the ego hijacking spirituality is a point that is expanded on beautifully in Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism. Highly recommend for anyone who wants to freak out their ego ;)

[@ughsirius]

Thank you so much, Dr K!

[@smittyflufferson1299]

2021 has been me going from mentally unwell to a half performer, going from survival mode to simply existing. Let's hope 2022 I take that next step from existing to success

[@kittykatinabag]

Okay I've been avoiding watching this video because I knew it would cut deep for me. What I didn't realize was how the Shoonya meditation would affect me. As I was observing the core of nullness in my being (for me it started as a sphere but morphed into a vague humanoid shape when I tried to touch it in my mind/bodyscape), a lot of things instantly connected for me. I had felt this feeling before- after breakups, after breakdowns, occasionally laying in bed right at the edge of sleep, it always has been there. When I was younger the explanation for that feeling I came up with is that I was fundamentally an empty and broken person, and one of my solutions as I got older was to try to fill the void up. I tried all sorts of feelings, from affection to hate to anger to spontaneity but instead of growing smaller the void either stayed the same size or grew. So I tried physical sensations, lust and physical affection, pain (before stopping because pain is well... painful), smoothness, softness, scratchiness, but again, nothing worked to fill the void. It was truly fascinating to just sit and observe it. I was definitely mentally freaking out a little as everything kind of connected a bit. I'm amazed at how easy and deep that experience was within the 10 or so minutes of meditation. Guess I should stop anxiously avoiding the path of meditation on Dr K's guide and actually start exploring it as well.

[@heidihageman523]

Very good video. Thoroughly enjoyed

[@funygameur]

15:25 - Self Destruction and Motivation, by wanting to be the best compared to others But if I consider that other are dumb I won't feel the need in Studying. I will in reality not want to see the Dragon of me potentially failing in class, when other make great, when I should recognize I'm not the best and that's OK. I just want to study. I don't want to put on the persona of a student I trougly want to study. (I might be afraid to discover I'm dumb or at least, cannot bear results in classe.)

[@thehypnotist9750]

That Shoonya meditation blew my mind

[@goobus_floobus]

The ego is what traps you doing something you used to enjoy, but now doing it makes you feel stuck

[@alsdean]

This is good stuff man, I really appreciate it!

[@FirstLast-yj1hp]

THIS VIDEO CAME AT THE RIGHT TIME FOR ME ! I felt exactly the same way as the OP!

[@Thepiccolopower]

40:45 I don’t have words to say how meaningful and important that was.

[@Sirinoks8]

Interesting. Wouldn't call myself an experienced meditator. But I completely got the concept. I actually raised a point recently about just being fine existing, while noticing how for many people it's hard to. I think I had this for a long time and now I know how it's called. Or, one of the ways it can be called. Cool content.

[@lakeberg5102]

Do you have an ego about being able to understanding the concept while others can't?

[@Sirinoks8]

@@lakeberg5102 I think so, to some degree. There's always been some comfort in being "special" for me. Be it because of something positive, or negative. That's definitely ego.

[@crystaleangel5736]

Shunya may feel like being free, but like if reality is an illusion how is that comforting. I feel it strips reality from its meaning when shunya says everything is in fact nothing. If reality isn’t real, and it doesn’t have meaning what’s the purpose of life? If life has no meaning than let’s all go be dead you know. I hate that way of perceiving reality. What makes us human is our bonds we make, our conscience, we thinking, innovating, having goals and dreams. Yes our ego shouldn’t be bigger than our heads but like it’s all in moderation. With shunya it feels like it gotta be all or nothing. Yes we exist, but we have the capacity to be more than just existing. We can live! Reality is relative to everyone, we just gotta learn to not be affected by concepts implemented by our society, not take away the validity of every concept ever.

[@PierSilver]

Kind noob here, but I feel your struggle too since I'm optimistic and "pro-living-life". The problem with shoonya is that the meditation results (so the shoonya) is... kinda unavoidable? That's why it's frightening. It's like staring in the abyss (put nietzche here if you know what I'm talking about) and an upside down sublime. You can also reference the kuzgesagt video on Optimistic Nihilism, which - as implied in the title - talks exaclty about that: how to approach life after you become "nihilistic".

[@TrufflezgarLaw]

Your word play is beautifully inspiring

[@viniciusgp5656]

That was awesome, thx doc!

[@EhrenmannHenno7469]

32:30 The void is the fundament on which everything is manifested, its like the background noise. I also like to notice the absolute silence that encompasses everything in existence, as the only noise we hear is from things that happe on the earth. I would say its a part of the abyss/void on the basis of hearing. Another part is the feeling of air on the skin. Its just the veil that stops our existence from encompassing everything in existence, infinity, or rather the void. (Distance/Size is relative)