Heathrow: Britain's Most Dangerous Airport (Parody)

[@JustJamesOfficial]

This video is a parody, mashing up audio/video from Heathrow: Britain's Busiest Airport. This is not a true reflection of what goes on at Heathrow. (Having to say for legal reasons!)

[@Seffek]

I missed watching this episode!

[@palacefan4286]

So glad this episode is back

[@ErmakDimon]

Please don't tell me you got sued over this

[@markh3285]

“More people fly out of Heathrow with dismembered limbs than any other airport” - a title to be proud of 😆

[@eldritchgoat1422]

This is probably true irl honestly

[@gobarn1877]

@@eldritchgoat1422 I was going to comment that as well!

[@hamsterdude1233]

Diversity at it's finest

[@artemis3181]

Gobarn pretty sure thats luton

[@gobarn1877]

@@artemis3181 live, laugh, Luton

[@TehhCake]

I don't use the imperial or metric system. I measure with Kylie Minogues.

[@Ewthulhu]

From nose to nose.

[@cajmo8635]

But that's a well known imperial unit

[@ericdunn555]

Anyone know how many Kylie Minogues there are in an imperial kilometre, please?

[@Thomaswilliams94]

@@ericdunn555 I think its approx 657.89 K(Minogue)

[@wwss3330]

British people are a bunch of simps

[@mel77316]

"Because shes a thirsty beast" LMAOOO

[@fuzzy5987]

"she's busy hunting passengers down with a blow pipe, because she's a thirsty beast" 🤣🤣🤣 OMG!

[@tinman8311]

That one had me 😂

[@ewanoxborrow1024]

“This woman missed her flight to Zurich this morning because she was *LOOTING* the airport” I’m crying

[@ben.taylor]

"The passengers need to be cooked a bit more, they're a little pale"

[@metetural9140]

"Miss, those are the Danish."

[@userPrehistoricman]

That's racist!

[@ben.taylor]

@@userPrehistoricman oh yeah so racist so offensive isn't it

[@lnteIIigence]

@@ben.taylor Impossible! One cannot be racist towards white people!

[@yeh.80]

@@ben.taylor He's just playin along

[@Nintentoad125]

"woman's handbag" "that's the first time I was called a handbag, and it was unacceptable"

[@sirpizo555]

“The passenger was shot through the head with a pistol”

[@stopgotdamndeletingmycomme8642]

😂😂😂

[@chickensandunicorns3089]

"First time I was called a handbag and it was unacceptable" ~ every karen ever

[@LIJVHAZ]

“The passenger was shot through the head with a pistol”

[@TheMightyKinkle]

I lost it then!

[@NOACCEPTANCE772]

Talk about overkill!!

[@Mr_Kian_Kane]

Lol I lost it at that bit

[@depfeffel6455]

Trying not to wake my heavily pregnant partner with my uncontrollable laughter 🤣🤣🤣

[@joethevlogger3742]

We found the suspect at the end.

[@JamieA242]

im sad you didnt edit "tools in their arsenal" to be "tools in their arse" cmon James.

[@JustJamesOfficial]

I'm still learning 😉

[@LondonTransportGuy]

I thought that too lol

[@TheManInBlueFlames]

@@JustJamesOfficial I expected that too.

[@nightowl8477]

I like arse as a word

[@anaveragesoviettankfromthe70s]

To be fair, I kinda heard "arsehole"

[@tomsharman6756]

"The SAS have a number of tools in their arsenal, to fight, Jessie J" 😭😭😭

[@Zuudo]

"Premium lounge manager Neelam is overseeing today's delivery of Kalashnikov AK-47 7.62mm assault rifles" *we get that all the time*

[@lucasc5622]

weeb

[@sumvs5992]

76.2? That's an extremely large rifle

[@Handhandme]

Must be so annoying to get the same assault rifles each day. Being a stewardess is tough ngl

[@LThaPunisha]

@@sumvs5992 7.62

[@sumvs5992]

@@LThaPunisha when I commented it was 76.2

[@OrdinaryJack1912]

"Now that the belt is moving again, the dead and wounded are scattered all over the airport."

[@APalebloodSky]

*"It's the largest passenger aircraft in the world, and cost Quantus over £280."* *I mean, that's technically true.*

[@coastliner7009]

Qantas*

[@violet7474]

JustJames is the help I didn't know I needed to get me through quarantine.

[@seancooper4058]

Since most of Just James' videos have characters named Just James, his videos can be considered self-insert fanfics. In this essay I will...

[@seancooper4058]

@ Sorry man, essay machine broke

[@JoeBleasdaleReal]

The queue can go for Like LoiK LiIiIk LIoIke Y’ know...like...minutes.

[@FriendlyNeighbourhoodSpidey]

Loik loik loik, ya knoiw, minutes

[@toma6068]

"Crucially the huge plane can carry 520 primitive tribesmen"

[@ericdunn555]

2 more than it's nearest competitor, by Jove.

[@ashbridgeindustries380]

@@ericdunn555 *Nearly 2 more

[@jgl4828]

"Transporting more than 74 million terrorists a year" Ok then

[@VincenzoInfi]

With the flights crashing every 45 seconds

[@lachlankeddie7]

Fun Fact: 'Kylie Minogue's lined up nose to nose' is the official unit of measurement we use down under. 😎

[@JoeBleasdaleReal]

“...costing 14 times the price of *BARE-BREASTED WOMEN”* 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@stugreen721]

"Last year Heathrow confiscated everything from mortars, rocket launchers, machine guns, submachine guns and rifles to jars of jam"

[@DaNiLY]

Ah yes, just James. Just the comedic relief we need right now.

[@freitchetsleimwor2406]

Where tf do you get all these sound clips (“shrunken human head”?)

[@LuminePrime]

I imagine the narrator did another program about terrorism which he took the voice clips from

[@fynnla.e]

@@LuminePrime Have you been to Heathrow? He has 100% not taken them from another programme.

[@mrportalman321]

The narrarator was the audiobook reader for Bravo Two Zero

[@mariea82]

Thwack 😂

[@sawyer2652]

@@LuminePrime I was thinking a documentary about tribesmen rather.

[@rdmilo1384]

“14 times the cost of bare-breasted women”... how much is a bare-breasted women? Asking for a friend

[@kleptrep94]

They cost about tree fiddy.

[@nightowl8477]

@@kleptrep94 - free tiddy

[@Tombofifa]

Those jars of jam are dangerous, watch out

[@BradDoesBanter]

Brilliant

[@stawfiq5]

Noice 😵😵😵

[@killjoy9918]

Holy shit hi brad

[@threeleafclover6003]

Holy fucking shit, didn't think I'd be seeing Brad here

[@emporioalnino4670]

Brad does minecraft

[@J_bixby]

"Heathrow employs 350 engineers round the clock to fire their weapons at passengers"

[@yeetusdeletus6594]

“It’s the first time I’ve been called a handbag, and it’s unacceptable!”

[@fynnla.e]

The passenger was shot through the head with a pistol

[@SubscriberswithnovideosC-ok7wv]

“It’s the first time I’ve been called a handbag, and that’s unacceptable.” 😂

[@BradT44]

“Passengers are preparing to use explosives to carry out small tasks”

[@msfs19941]

"The equivalent of 100 Kylie Minogues lying nose to nose" 😂😂

[@GCKrap]

2:45 onwards “ … and jars of jam” I’m fucking dying 😂😂😂😂

[@KiranEvans]

I bloody love this channel. Every time I see there's a new one out it puts a smile on my face!

[@weaponofmassconstruction1940]

I said the same when I was first potty trained.

[@thebotbuilder]

So if the plane is 3 metres long which is the same as 100 Kylie Minogues, that means Kylie is 3cm tall. To be honest, she is very short so I wouldn't be too surprised if she was.

[@coloradostatesenatorsteven7443]

Ayup

[@thebotbuilder]

@@coloradostatesenatorsteven7443 Ayup!

[@albond]

@@thebotbuilder *Minogues, *3cm, *too surprised

[@No-dl6im]

Nose to nose, so she’s even smaller

[@englishbob5106]

TheBotBuilder Looks like 8 inches to me. 😜

[@10randhawas]

RIP Jessie J 😩😭

[@Harryofbath]

I read the title and thought: "what the hell are they on about?" Then I read the uploader's name and it all fell into place.

[@coloradostatesenatorsteven7443]

Well, look who's back

[@metetural9140]

Guess who's back

[@pitaya4151]

@@metetural9140 Back again

[@metetural9140]

@@pitaya4151 Just James is back, with a rogue communist Jessie J

[@kabuterrimondw5919]

Noooo way, was literally watching this show the other day and was also looking at how long ago you had uploaded. More please!

[@tomhiscocks242]

“It was the first time I was called a handbag and that is unacceptable” So offensive 🤣

[@Adam_Walsh]

I started to question its legitimacy when he said”helping terrorists” lol

[@kieranj600]

Oh ffs, for a second I thought this was an actual documentary when I remembered that it’s busiest airport and not a terrorist centre

[@willbrown5586]

"and wants to perform an incredible juggling act."

[@JustDevon]

When I saw the thumbnail I thought this was a documentary. Then I saw it was a Just James video

[@dabism]

I've never seen a more impressive job juggling act, than that Just James fellow.

[@theothermagneticaesthetic]

All while continuing with his Love Live studies. A man we should all aspire to be.

[@mydickisincrediblytinyandi7380]

James I watched you since universally challenge and your break literally killed me. One of my favourite YTP creators. I'm so glad you came through at a crucial time.

[@josef596]

I wish they would bring back come fly with me, then you wouldn’t have to edit it.

[@oioioi6664]

I’ve actually had quite a similar experience when I was last at Heathrow

[@joehook5533]

Y’know, the queue can go for like, like, like, you know, like, minutes

[@furrettheferret9562]

THE LAD IS BACK

[@TheManInBlueFlames]

Man it's been so long since a good Just James video. I hope you make more of these videos during this quarantine. There's a lot of good edits to be made of the crap coming out.

[@segaretro92]

no way it’s back

[@JustJamesOfficial]

Let's see what Heathrow Airport has to say 🤦

[@ujustgotpwned2008]

"It's the largest passenger aircraft in the world, and cost Qantas over £280" - I mean, factually accurate I guess?

[@darrylmac6150]

"nearly two more than its closest competitor" 😂😂 fuckin brilliant

[@hermionestranger4964]

How fitting that "Danse Macabre" is playing in the background, while the jovial British narrator rattles off Heathrow's proudest death statistics.

[@joestasitunes]

So glad you're back making more of these videos. They're absolutely gold m8!

[@geekygirl0333]

I can't believe you are back, please upload more frequently in these times of quarantine!!!!

[@cantthinkofaname3344]

Oh my god This is brilliant

[@theocieslik254]

This is the best KZbin channel in existence

[@itsjustewan]

"Tracking a rogue *communist*, Jessie J, spotted over runway 2"

[@pablotescobar5444]

rouge

[@itsjustewan]

@@pablotescobar5444 lol ty

[@leahford9908]

2 uploads in one year wow were being blessed

[@lewishlyd]

As an aviation enthusiast, I was so happy when this came out!! Great vid James

[@ThoshanTheMusical]

Lol the specifics of the AK47 killed me 😂😂 bloody Neelam hahah

[@jerviservi]

2:22 Erm I think we just need to tell the chefs that the passengers need to be cooked just a little bit more, they're a bit pale. That got so hard. XD

[@matthewwoolf7073]

Please never stop making these james

[@Xgameplayboxgames]

PLEASE make an edit of Inside London Fire Brigade!

[@fistoos4152]

Not many people know how much editing and creative thinking stuff like this takes this is fucking art :D

[@BertytheSnowman]

Lost it at excessive hand grenades 1:18

[@VacantHaven]

So glad to see your channel pop up on my notifications! ✌️

[@invisi.]

i hapax legomenoned out of my chair when i saw this notification

[@harharharman_1218]

"The SAS have a number of tools in their arsenal to fight against Jessie J"

[@signal1538]

"It's the largest passenger aircraft in the world and cost Quantas over £280" is done so smoothly I almost didn't notice the edit 😅

[@Cpr1234]

When the Airbus A380 is 280 metres of wide and 3 metres long and is the same as 100 Kylie Minogues. Haha

[@LivvyHackett]

The fact that the narrator sounds the same for the original and changed lines makes it so smooth~

[@w4976.]

1:24 had me creasing 😂😂😂

[@Speedline3601]

The best video to watch before boarding a flight to Heathrow

[@jacksonprince9036]

“Screw you, you old handbag!” “So you have chosen... death.”

[@NiskaMagnusson]

finally an upload, my life is complete, this is pure gold

[@affbtbltta]

I have been subscribed for almost a year waiting for a new video. Was worth the wait

[@oumiyamyorkie]

Damn, I hate it when someone calls me a handbag

[@DrRiq]

It's unacceptable

[@kSubscribersBefore-rb5ss]

*Somebody please tell me how he does this. Because I’m sure this guy doesn’t say ‘dismembered limbs’ on the daily* 😂😂

[@Crackracket]

"Hunting passengers with a blow pipe because she's a thirsty beast" I fucking lost it.

[@deadgiveaway-z3i]

When i saw the title i was like *hmm, something educational*, when i saw ''Just James'' *oh yeah yeah it's meme time.*

[@tomgvaughan]

“The lane has been closed for ten minutes and the backlog of passengers had been set on fire”

[@slay9537]

I am obsessed with your videos oml

[@CatWithBlins]

This has brought me nothing but joy thank you so much

[@ryanm.191]

The most dangerous airports are the ones where students learn to fly You’ll see a student doing mach 2 on landing in a Cessna 172

[@cantthinkofaname3344]

ah yes. landing at twice the speed of sound...sounds *fun*

[@ryanm.191]

Charlie Roberts sounds about right for a student pilot

[@MDMNN_DVD_]

At first I thought this was a normal documentary until it said explosives in the plane and people shot in the head. 😂

[@Cpr1234]

same here except I thought it was actually called Britain's most dangerous airports, then I realised it was Just James finally releasing a new video. I had to watch this anyway :)

[@Bloops]

Unfinished London took an unexpected turn i see.

[@rwmusic492]

I have had a bad day today and this has cheered me up! Thanks for creating it

[@sarahmckie3445]

the humour is truly unrivalled. makes your proud to be british

[@georged4578]

I thought this was a real video about Heathrow and got I really confused.

[@joebancroft2714]

I meant to be flying to New York from Heathrow today 😬

[@XJokermanX]

James I guarantee you love making these videos. Yes it takes effort, I can just see u there laughing when ur watching back the edits

[@alexthebruh]

About time a new just james!!!!

[@duebloom1678]

Glad to see an uploaded from you!

[@kazkifairman2001]

0:42 "280 meters wide" i remember this was an error on the original programme

[@jessfortyfour]

This channel is the best ytp channel

[@Silvera-Avian]

You know, the queue can go like, like, like, you know, like.... minutes.