Hoi4 But My 3 Year Old Makes All The Decisions

[@theoderiktrajanson2607]

To be fair, this is pretty historically accurate. Stayuki is playing the role of the less-insane german staff and the daughter is playing the role of Hitler

[@thenewlosingspeedoflight]

Yep

[@Chikinbokbok]

Yep

[@ramblingguy3439]

Ja

[@jlander1054]

The best I’ve seen this video summed up

[@fliegendeluftwaffeli835]

ah, just a nice, cold roast.

[@johnmichaelchance1151]

Joia: “It’s not easy being a genius, but that’s understandable. Not everyone can be like me.”

[@adamhrin9866]

"truly wonderful the mind of a child is" Master Yoda

[@patriot17764th]

Indeed!

[@aris91696]

hhhehehehehehheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[@fiveninenowNOW]

This is enough to make a grown man cry…

[@lordchaos3090]

@@adamhrin9866 Good... gooood...

[@nataliesmith5439]

“I want to build a castle” “Thats awesome what do you want to do next?” *destroy greece*

[@davidthor4405]

Conquest of Constantinople in a nutshell

[@badeatervlogsandmemes2128]

And then Poland… Let’s hope she doesn’t spontaneously start hating Jewish people.

[@opsquash]

"You want the skull and crossbones?" "It has wings! :D"

[@tylerredforge5563]

⚡️⚡️

[@gagenater]

That's about as logical as some of the decisions the Nazi's actually made. 'Skulls with wings! we should have paratroopers with winged skull logos on their uniforms - it'll look sharp!'

[@Prauwlet213]

imagine her going to history class, hearing "hitler" and being like "oh, thats the guy from my dad's game!"

[@northwesteastsouth7437]

Teacher and her friends: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@epapuelvalve3250]

@@northwesteastsouth7437 🤨

[@northwesteastsouth7437]

@@epapuelvalve3250 hey look elephant

[@Snsidbbfjd]

Bro if 1 + 1 = 2 then why does 1 + 2 - 2 = a number?

[@PotenaYT]

@@Snsidbbfjd bro what are you talking about?

[@rower1698]

Joia: turns 3 years old Her father: "You are going to control a country!" Very wise decision, mlord.

[@fliegendeluftwaffeli835]

just like a 4-year old who is suddenly now an emperor and doesnt know what to do

[@exoels]

Reminds me how Pol pot rules Cambodia when he's 10

[@albertdutzman8292]

@@fliegendeluftwaffeli835 except this one was a genius aparently

[@will5741]

@@exoels Qing Dynasty had a 3 or 4 yr old as Emperor mind this was one of the last Emperors of the Qing

[@el_de_el_loquendo9855]

Me an 11 years guy who plays hoi4 I think 8 years make a difference

[@DenTehSand]

You gave a child the option to be any leader of 1936, any country, and she chose Adolf hitler.

[@carolinus7566]

Well to be fair he's smack dab in the centre of a lineup of like 8 or 9 majors. You have to click to open all of em up.

[@kami6991]

well he has a funny moustache so its understandable

[@snelwasnthere]

@Thunder Life Studios yea, because htiler was a funni mustache man with the nonoo symbol

[@thenugget1991]

Joinin the dark side early i see

[@jaredjosephsongheng372]

@@snelwasnthere Nein nein

[@4rchitech-rblx947]

I see she is a person of military. Not politics. Love it all, keep it up Stakuyi!

[@grudeasnaots210]

militarist 👍

[@MilnaAlen]

And in the Soviet Union one she does pretty much all politics 😂 Though she still chooses airplanes a few times. Not much else lol

[@GhostCryProductions]

“One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.” - Evil Overlord List, Rule 12

[@Kma99107]

That is true kids notice problems and tell you about them, at least when I was a kid and the kids I've met

[@robertalberson8417]

That's the cutest little dictator I've ever seen

[@jacquehohenheim7934]

So it would seem *POTC theme plays*

[@danielarias6342]

0:47 looks like your daughter already knows about germany’s buffs

[@testztetab]

Hitler: “I know the affect I have on daughters.”

[@fliegendeluftwaffeli835]

ah, undoing the treaty of versailles. - failed austrian painter

[@JerryDaPlatypus]

@@testztetabHitler: "I love ze kinder."

[@arjandosanj6131]

Historically accurate representation of German general staff dealing with Hitler

[@euanstokes2828]

😭

[@gengarzilla1685]

Honestly, you're not wrong.

[@neildolan3700]

Adorable, terrifying and responsible for the deaths of thousands, but adorable.

[@lennard939]

Thats probaply lowballing it

[@vickiesona3682]

You mean millions

[@idioticed4379]

Tanya moment

[@buddermonger2000]

Probably about 2 million tbh. Which is actually the good ending.

[@gengarzilla1685]

I love how she just joyously started giving out "awards" without seeming to get the context behind it.

[@albertdutzman8292]

She just wants everyone to get an aword

[@LuckyPigeon1111]

I don't either. Please explain lol

[@thenugget1991]

Yes. Please.

[@jaredjosephsongheng372]

@@LuckyPigeon1111 The "Awards" were basically you just end up screwing over Romania by giving Transylvania to Hungary

[@jaredjosephsongheng372]

@@thenugget1991 The "Awards" were basically you just end up screwing over Romania by giving Transylvania to Hungary

[@touchthesky3948]

This shall be interesting. I can only imagine how chaotic this is going to be

[@stakuyi]

it was chaos

[@boringo6338]

@@stakuyi I laughed so damn hard when Joia elected to destroy Greece

[@proud_greek223]

@@stakuyi your daughter grandparents are probably eva and Hitler her dna is german and austrian 💀💀💀💀💀💀

[@The_Keeper]

@@stakuyi And yet... It was overwhelmingly efficient and powerful. :D

[@primal_guy1526]

Only 3 years old and she's already gone for the CAS meta first thing. This kid is going places

[@helljumper5601]

0:47 “You choose Hitler. Ok.” *VERY NERVOUS SWEATING*

[@Largest_Man-e5z]

The best part is when she learns history in school and is told about the country she chose.

[@nivaldoschmiedel8245]

Answer:(confident) -Humrrum!

[@BattleAttack51]

Based

[@fliegendeluftwaffeli835]

just wait till she fails art school in vienna.

[@gabrielp4392]

@@Largest_Man-e5z “You know, I was Hitler once.”

[@timslack7568]

seeing her face light up when you say shes gonna control a country and then immediately choosing Hitler is to say the least a little concerning lol

[@fodetraore6666]

America's future man. It's America's futur.

[@cantripleplays]

No? Who doesn’t want to control things with no repercussions it’s not like she’s gonna do it in real life… RIGHt?

[@MilnaAlen]

@@cantripleplays Yeah I was super into Sims 2 as a kid, and sometimes liked to torture the sims 😂 And I definitely wouldn't drown or burn anyone irl. Though building a giant hedge maze around my house still sounds cool... It would be funny to see how dedicated people are to talk about their religion lol.

[@notcrazy6288]

Daughter obviously going for the meta

[@lampionmancz]

"You resisted me so that is your own problem" I think that that's exactly how Hitler justified his wars.

[@soyuznavy]

Kid is an actual chad. She's everything I wanna be in life.

[@deutschermichel5807]

happy

[@breadstuff1]

@@deutschermichel5807 same

[@grudeasnaots210]

​@@deutschermichel5807 We lost that when we were taught about the real problems... like studies, taxes, finance, depression, inflation... and the inevitable Nukes baby!!!!!!!!

[@devin8811]

You wanna be Hitler

[@another64qqi29]

You wanna be hitler?

[@Desteroyah195]

Can't wait to see in like 15 years a game between Joia and Taureor's son.

[@touchthesky3948]

The next video should be Joia making all the decisions while Stakuyi plays as the USSR. I need this in my life

[@stakuyi]

that sounds like way more extreme paranoia of stalin

[@touchthesky3948]

@@stakuyi It shall be the most adorable purge in the history of the Soviet Union

[@BagofBeans1]

@@touchthesky3948 POLITCAL PARANOIA : 100%

[@WheelieGoodGames]

@stakuyi make it happen.

[@idikm]

@@ROH-Heligoland it happened

[@GeneralGrievousCIS]

Never imagined I'd here the words "I want to partition Poland" come out of the mouth of a three year old girl, lol

[@aidanlazarus9465]

Just wait till shes older. Your making a military genius.

[@titanicblair2]

It's 2068 she's a 5 star General and they ask her for order she replies "release the planes" 4 star General: how many Her: all of them

[@aidanlazarus9465]

@@titanicblair2 Agreed. Dont forget the helicopters as well

[@Noobz4Life11]

She will lead us though WW3

[@pizzahut2236]

you're*

[@a_usernamehere3680]

@@pizzahut2236 you're fatherless

[@Emmapilmanis]

She is truly a tactically gifted child

[@daddytito917]

Makes me happy knowing she’ll look back at playing map games with her dad fondly

[@carlthecat6881]

This is going to be so awkward for her to watch back in 10 years

[@ohwowitsthatguy9154]

"YOU CHOSE HITLER!?! HAHAHAHAHAH, OH GIRL, I CAN'T-" "Oh don't worry, it gets worse."

[@fatchins9126]

Unless her father sent her down the Map game loophole

[@camel9568]

@@fatchins9126 Her college fund will be used for all HOI4 dlc

[@therealspeedwagon1451]

@@fatchins9126 she’s gonna get older and get into modded hoi4 Oh god imagine her playing EaW or TNO

[@manisuredolovepvz134]

mlp war mod where a griffin wants to murder ponies

[@MB-eb9ed]

She is secretly a master hoi4 player. She knew you’d get a fat amount of oil and could afford a massive air force lol

[@EuroNutellaMan]

"Choose a country" Immediately chooses Hitler with no hesitation, smiles even I'm dying of laughter

[@CheesiusCaesar69]

Its so adorable that this inoccent little girl is just choosing descisions for the Nazis, without knowing the horrifying context behind it all

[@gengarzilla1685]

I was genuinely laughing when she began giving "awards" to her "friends". Without context it just sounds like a very sweet thing to do.

[@TheLimecat100]

Joia immediately picking germany made me burst out laughing

[@seand0112]

"You wanna be hitler?" "Yeah! *with a smirk* "

[@cxgrosskreutz7213]

Here is a sentence I never thought I would say, but well, here it is: "I kind of want to see your daughter in the Spanish Civil War."

[@fares_nshadows]

Same but thats a death wish

[@AureliusLaurentius1099]

Basically the Carlist Wars

[@jaredjosephsongheng372]

Well it seems your wish has been granted

[@lisalatif3841]

She broke the game like a pro

[@yeetsco9980]

She's simply doing an early mil build!

[@doctortcool9586]

Short question, if you get civs anyway from your focus, and you get quite a good buff to mil construction, on top of the fact that you start with a decent amount of mils and can go to war economy, isn't it a good idea to start with building mils?

[@yeetsco9980]

@@doctortcool9586 how you doing

[@doctortcool9586]

@@yeetsco9980 good?

[@yeetsco9980]

@@doctortcool9586 oh yea I forgot to tell you but watch 71cloak’s video on when to build mils. He basically says (like you said) that if you’re playing a major in single player it’s almost always better to do mils day 1 lol

[@MrCreeperYT_Official]

Teacher: What does the military do kids? Joia after playing HOI4: *destroy the communist scum*

[@superabdoking5372]

I mean America has tried to do the same Soooooo

[@jevinliu4658]

No that's the job of our Central Bank. The Communists can only be beaten by controlling inflation and ending Smallpox-era stimulus.

[@dea846]

Lmao

[@insomnia35rex48]

Joia welcome to the Reich

[@dapizzasnake8462]

Even his daughter learnt from Alex the rambler. Cas is king.

[@protogenxl]

Well if it was a 4 year old child they would be able to understand Fredonia's treasury report

[@stuffgoeshere5837]

Ah yes, teaching your daughter how to play the germans in 36, good ol' family bonding

[@adder95]

Joia looks like the kind of person who would switch to wartime economy before unpause

[@hernandezesparzadaniel1110]

Lesson learned : if u had problems of economy do planes a lot of them , this gonna helps on a future scenario :D

[@thej7362]

damn joia is aggressive! built her army and air force instantly, no remorse!

[@spartanking1188]

We need a second episode where she chooses another country. This was so cursed but so great at the same time

[@prestonjones1653]

Joia playing Crusader Kings would be hilarious.

[@invincibleadmiral]

Stakuyi’s reaction to her picking Germany at the start had me burst out laughing. XD

[@effinu4real]

This reminds me of the scene in Fellowship of the Ring when Gandalf asks Frodo to choose whether the Fellowship should go through Moria

[@imperiumCirca41]

To think a child is already mastering the idea of Aerial supremacy..

[@femurremover]

It's not crazy if it works. Excited to see what happens in Stellaris on Friday.

[@GabrielJ1000]

This will be very interesting. RIP economy

[@razorflossrazor2937]

I'm surprised this went as well as it did

[@retro_roy5591]

it was so funny when her little cute voice said "lets partition poland"

[@flavhector]

Stakuyi : My daughter wins as germany in hoi4 All of us : we will watch your career with great interest

[@RobertDecker417]

Give her some Ace Combat or Project Wingnan with all the air stuff she chose immediately.

[@MrNicoJac]

Hitler getting outplayed by a 3 year old.... "That's HOI4, baby" 😎

[@arthurmorganssickness1888]

This reminds me of my first game as Germany. After a long long long war with the allies and the Nordic alliance (mod) I finally was able to take land but there was too much land for me to garrison...so I puppeted everyone..........and ended up with 54 puppets. Then after the soviets died I had 67

[@NetralFN]

Imagine owning 67 puppet nation controlled by 1 nation,if this is happening irl there is definitely atleast 1 revolution

[@arthurmorganssickness1888]

@@NetralFN I was lucky, this was before I bought any DLC so I didn't have to worry about my puppets becoming free

[@Ketamiinikaapo]

This mustve been what was going on in the german high commands before barbarossa >"We control all of Europe and have the UK on their knees, should we finish them off?" >"No, attack the largest country on earth."

[@robiagacitei5487]

Wait what, how's Czechoslovakia the major in that war at 7:59? Isn't it normally Romania?

[@alexrajic4536]

Czechoslovakia has a democratic route they can do where they can form the Czech Entente between themselves, Romania, and Yugoslavia instead of choosing to side with the Allies, the original historical context behind this was that these three formed this as a little bit of an anti-Hungarian alliance after Hungary went communist in 1919 but was later disbanded, therefore because Czechoslovakia was the leader of the faction they were automatically given major status

[@catlovingtrio]

Give her control of every event decision and peace treaties. If it went well when you gave her full control over national focuses, it'll go even better with that. Or maybe make this a series where you give her more control over the country each episode. Just make sure she doesn't repeat countries.

[@partylizard8343]

"peace treaties" nothing can be worse than the AI

[@baul997]

Damn just from the very first decision I can already tell she is going to be a Hoi player in the future XD

[@ShadowReaper-pu2hx]

When your daughter turns five (learns to read), you should let her play a whole Hearts Of Iron game by herself.

[@Bluesonofman]

So when I clicked on this I was thinking she was actually going to be playing

[@idioticed4379]

This would be a rather short video if that was the case

[@ruddiestmanx5116]

When she picked Hitler. "Like I said, kids are cruel, Jack... and I'm very in touch with my inner child!"

[@ElIisL4D2]

When she's older, you should do another video with this, and compare the choices from before.

[@teresar6348]

The annual 'Joia takes over the world' stream

[@JustASimpleScholar]

This would be a very weird timeline to live in. Aside from that, I found the video quite amusing and funny.

[@eclipseyoli2051]

Oh boy CHILDREN RUNNING COUNTRIES! WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG!!!

[@eclipseyoli2051]

Alot

[@eclipseyoli2051]

Alot is the answer

[@AsheBoyce]

Ask Simeon of Bulgaria. He's still alive.

[@AlexB2998]

Without a doubt, the cutest voice to ever demand army innovations,

[@TheEGrievous]

Imagine her demanding the sudetenland.

[@sirpixel7945]

Intresting, we shall watch her career with great intrest!

[@dison1172]

This would be a fun series to have her run all the nations!

[@PixelTheMushroom]

This is just what it's like with kids, people underestimate how much kids love some good old fashioned violence (not real-life violence obviously)

[@itszilo7436]

I would love to see this be a series on the channel

[@UnusualDomenic]

Can't wait to see the wife do this.

[@StarNeverDoes]

When Joia picked the German Reich, one of the strongest starting countries with the fastest decisions to rise to power with the easiest gameplay in starting HOI4, just on a whim like that, I immediately thought "Dang, that kid's destined for greatness."

[@curlyfries2956]

Lmfao this reminds me earlier today my 15 month old cousin came to my house and I immediately put my pickelhaube on her head and started humming Prussian glory. I see we are both training the little ones well 😂

[@rextheroyalist6389]

Joia: Hear me out... P L A N E

[@egyptoballmapping8706]

Shouldve played yugoslavia. You can have young king peter in charge lmao

[@benplocica3790]

as soon as I saw her first choice I knew that this was going to be hilarious.

[@zaitan1042]

Love you and your content man

[@teresar6348]

A fellow aerospace engineer in the making with those early choices

[@amanda021174]

A Gaming Prodigy at age 3? Joya is super cute & super smart! You must be proud!

[@davidstrojan904]

Your daughter ia a genius. Promote her to Field Marshal and let her command & conquer every one else.

[@tiredman99]

She's freaking adorable lmao

[@MrTacoKing-1]

3 year old hitler also seems cute to me!

[@Basti87b]

Just imagined Hitler discussing Research Innovations, answering to the question why he choose this specific research option with: "It has wings!!!" 🤣

[@epRivera]

Imagine Hitler taking the advice of a 3 year old seriously 😂

[@ivanrenic4243]

Ah, a wholesome family moment

[@anthonysacco5010]

YOU have to do more of these... I laughed so damn hard!!

[@helenski9139]

POV: Poland is becoming a commonwealth Everyone: Well, we're screwed.

[@generalaj7164]

Make a part 2 and try to play Historical Russia while your daughter choices all the wrong focus

[@valvefan]

"soviet union declares war on russia" One of the cursed things i ever heard

[@RanchhandGaming]

I feel like this is what every advisor to child king's feel like. " Do you want plains, to influence politics, or fix the economy." "AIR PLAINS" "AND WAR" lols

[@2Cerealbox]

It really feels like you made a lot of decisions that should have been left in the hands of a 3 year old.

[@CrimsonCavalierGaming]

Picking things based on if they have wings or if they are castles seems as good as a criteria as anything else.

[@music-lv3dl]

0:47 “There are no accidents” -Master Oogway

[@paweostrzelkowski5805]

It will be really great option to play as commander of only one army, see what rullers of country do, maybe make some plot etc

[@fliegendeluftwaffeli835]

Ah, the best combination every person would be terrified of.

[@Omar_Dum11]

As a 12 Year old, I've done many bad things as Germany in HOI4 and I recognize my sins.

[@ethrsag735]

"So what's the deal?" "A cute choice of words." 😏

[@The_Keeper]

Oh man, showing her this video when she is older. Gonna be gold. :D

[@Archibald1705]

The little dictator Sounds like a '80s movie lol

[@sld1776]

Plot twist: Joia understands the game and she was trolling dad.

[@Luizguilherme-iz9yl]

He: puts her on the choose faction screen Me, looking at it: "she is going to choose him is she not?" Edit: indeed