How can I discipline my child without breaking their spirit? - Ask Dr. Stanley

Are you the parent of a strong-willed child? Dr. Charles Stanley shares some biblical advice with a mother who wants to raise their child to serve and obey God.
In Touch Ministries, 2010. For more messages from Charles Stanley, including this week's broadcast, go to www.intouch.org/watch
Automated Chapters:
0:00 Introduction
2:38 What breaks a child's spirit? Ignoring their opinions or requests
2:53 Making them feel helpless or hopeless
3:13 Making demeaning comparisons
3:28 Using fearful words
3:43 Expressing misdirected anger
4:07 Criticizing their best efforts
4:48 Failure to provide good things for them to look forward to
5:24 Correct discipline: Check your motives
5:37 Carefully explain the reason
6:11 Use a loving tone of voice
6:29 Never discipline in anger
6:56 Keep your promises
7:19 Share your regrets
7:36 Never strike with your hand

[@AQKuilan]

I wish I had found this video 15 years ago. Wow I can see where I have gone wrong and pray God will direct me with my 2 young children.

[@cheryl71000]

In ten minutes you have just explained what i have read in five books on parenting. Thank you, this is what i was so afraid of when my daughter was younger breaking her spirit.

[@HotelManagementMistakes]

Most books are a scam. They prance around the grit of it for 20 chapters.

[@agape1cordova805]

I gotta remember to not act out of frustration and anger! And to use the proper words.

[@christinachandy2801]

I grew up with my mother listening to Dr. Charles Stanley (she still does). And now when I've become a parent, here I've come across the same. May God bless this ministry

[@SimonPeterTanMusic]

had tears in my eyes while watching listening to this video. I love my daughter so much. i want to be very careful to discipline her everytime she made mistake. because i know so well that God is so merciful and loving to me even when i disobey Him sometimes.

[@mjwas3475]

Thank you needed that 🙏

[@kingdomthingstnt]

💯

[@sugarsauce2435]

Me too. I had tears too. I'm struggling as a parent. I want to make sure my children are ready to spread their wings and be able to handle the real world. I think a huge issue is parents are also afraid of CPS and their over reach. Its like if you even disagree with your own child, now you have to worry about CPS coming and taking them because you refuse to allow them to get a sex change for example. (Praise God, I'm not in that kind of situation) It's getting harder to be a parent with the internet being something we HAVE to use and rely on. No matter how hard you try to oversee what your teenager is doing on the internet, there is ALWAYS a way around the protections. People say then just dont let your child get on the internet.. To that I say, so do YOU monitor everything your child does at school? A friends house? Do you know all the different ways our children can bypass those protections and how quickly they can do it? As a parent, I'm frustrated. Everything for school, medical everything is connected to the internet. Where any stranger can see. Not to mention the very serious and personal information about our children being uploaded by the schools to the internet. Unless you have good and I mean GOOD knowledge of the internet and cyber security... And even then, it's CONSTANTLY changing so its hard to keep up with... And now... Now, we also have to contend with Ai. AHHHHHH. Please, pray for me. I'll pray for you as well. I need Godly guidance. Not worldly, profitable gas lighting.

[@sweetsias1179]

Thank you for this!I searched this one because I dont know if im diciplining my child correctly. Thank you very much!

[@VSGLife]

❤️🙏🏾

[@angelinamendez5027]

I searched for this wisdom and knew you would have the wisdom I needed from God.

[@KellieMC]

THANK YOU!!! SUCh a blessing for me to hear this!! I've got a bachelor in psychology and at wits end with my almost 5 year old (split family). Secular parenting teachings are ruining our children. THIS was directed at me from the Father. God Bless you.

[@jennifergeorge7280]

This is really helpful. God brought me to this video at the right time! Thank you

[@hephzibahmakhetha4371]

Wow! Coming from the family that I come from it seems strange to apologise to kids after disciplining them. Made me think. Thank you

[@4familyministry244]

The first time ever that discipline with love is explained in a way that i could understand what is meant. Thank you

[@davidd.5068]

Wow I've never heard it explain this way Very glad this came up on my feed Thank God for wise men for Charles Stanley Who teach us through God's Word

[@jdmugen85]

Thank you Lord for this wonderful message.

[@puristarkistar5259]

I love your sermons, they are my daily breakfast. Thanks for never starving my breakfast. God reward you

[@lydiasimms5675]

Thank you for this message, I see areas where I have failed in areas.

[@joannsemana4770]

i felt gulty after watching this..i am sorry about my son..thanks for sharing this.

[@noonashie]

I'm so glad I chose to watch this among those that came up in my search. I really needed the guidance and reminder. I've been asking myself why I'm so frustrated lately and been praying a lot for patience. I've been searching the bible but I know someone wiser has to explain it so I would understand better. Thank you for this video. God bless us all.

[@jezhvrod4028]

I am a young adult on the brink of leaving the house and this made cry. My father in specific has done all the things you said not to do😔 he is sooo negative towards me and my siblings that his shear presence is suffocating.

[@hephzibahmakhetha4371]

May God comfort you. Forgive him (not condone him). Pray for the grace to do better when you become a parent

[@nabamompi9192]

Please pray for my baby and me to become good parents.

[@DorothySbornak]

I always wondered if my spirit was broken as a child. My dad was so strict on ne never allowing me to do anything. I was never allowed to do things other children did. I couldn't go to a ballgame or a sleepover except for one time and my dad was outside to pick me up early in the morning as we woke up. It was humiliating for me. He thought he was punishing the school system by not giving me an extra 25 cents for snack time when they raised the prices. I had to choose what i got each day. A drink or snack unless id save my money and get both. To tyis day im afraid to speak up and defend myself. I never kniw what to say out of fear. Parents please understand your child needs discipline but not too much to where it hurts the little ones that much. God bless all the little children.

[@gadams2762]

Very helpful

[@tinadizon7424]

Thank you Pastor ! Thank you for your life , your wisdom lives

[@brittanysundberg9951]

This is the most beautiful way to explain discipline.

[@chizoradisa9552]

I've learnt a whole lot and pray I'd use them as I raise my children

[@misspinkpunkykat]

Applies to parents of adult children too.

[@nordscan9043]

@C B1983 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4

[@lorenabordonpous7592]

Excelente como siempre, Pastor Stanley! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@revshoney]

Thank you for being clear, practical, and concise.

[@schavonnawilliams484]

This is such INVALUABLE information!! Thank you so much Dr Stanley. God bless you

[@anazechner5833]

Thank you!!!!!!!! Very useful towards disciplining my little one. Blessings and thank you for sharing

[@domingodaw-as5950]

Thank you God for this powerful message on how to dicipline a child through a biblical way & thank you pastor Stanley & in touch ministry

[@emilymarie5413]

I have been parenting out of guilt due to the fact that I’m doing it on my own. Financially physically emotionally. I feel I’m trying to over compensate and it’s a lot of pressure and I’m too soft.

[@nathanielgray4235]

Its not easy doing it alone

[@GreenGo731]

I’m a single parent as well, I understand you completely! Being the father and mother it’s very difficult ! I wonder where in the Bible it can help us in our walk and discipline

[@nonenone5611]

I'm not a single parent but feel I'm too hard. 😥 I know I need to be soft through God grace he will deliver me.

[@chrissyboo564]

@Lerisa smith don’t be guilty! There is not shame nor condemenation in Christ. The Lord sees you and He is your comfort plus that child/children does have a present Father (God) who is more present than any man could ever be. Remind yourself and your babies of that. Discipline in a stern and loving way and do not let the devil fill you with lies of shame and guilt. You are doing your best! I am proud of you, God bless you and your family!

[@jamillahtemplo4014]

Thank you so much Dr Charles for this lesson, I have so many realization. Praying that I could have this kind of Godly discipline in our home. God bless you more.

[@sekharjames6747]

Thankyou sir.. This is an eye opener for me as a Christian parent.. God bless you

[@mikey-mike2162]

I love this!!

[@elizazephaniahlee6672]

My mother has done every single thing that you said not to do. I am so tired of being yelled at and not understanding what I do wrong. I am so tired of being compared to other people.

[@user-di8pi6sn1l]

Same here😩 I will still be criticize no matter how I tried to please them. I even feel like running away but I have no where to go 😢 my church is the only place that gives me peace of my mind. May the Holy Spirit help us🙏

[@ConnectedfamiliesOrg]

It so very important indeed to strike the right tone when you are disciplining your child, such a great video that is so in line with our course on discipline that connects.

[@ivyananmawuko9984]

What wise counsel Dr. Stanley

[@jcnithyahere]

Very wise, insightful, useful advice. Thank you!!

[@ForestFan751]

Always liked this guy

[@Nina_Medina]

Amen! Very much helpful

[@rubyday2496]

Very helpful. Thank you!

[@hummingbirdee9389]

Pearls of wisdom! Thank you!

[@josephbello6423]

Very wise counsel!

[@DArtiz33]

Thank you for this

[@AwakeningLeela]

This guy is spot on,thank you.

[@anayadanayad451]

Thank you. This is so helpful

[@QueenShonzie]

This is so good!

[@ElianaRuthFarias]

Very helpful and clear! Thank you!

[@chrissyboo564]

The only Sound-judging , And Godly pastor in this time

[@user-di8pi6sn1l]

My mom is doing all things that was told not to be done💔. Sometimes I do doubt if truly she is my mother or I was adopted. I only wants her to show me LOVE and give me PEACE OF MIND. I am tired of crying and overthinking😔

[@CynthiaAva]

Thank you for this word. I needed to hear it today.

[@monalouise6996]

Thank you. This is helpful for grandparents too. It’s challenging but I must get it right. 🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@dawitzewdie330]

thank you Dr. Stanley. It's very much helpful for me as being a new father. Blessings!!!

[@aleengaggo3831]

So much helpful wisdom that hits the targets. Thank you Dr. Stanley! You are missed greatly

[@jondoormouse8612]

discipline with respect for your child's humanity that is G-d's way.

[@justinperez5083]

Thank you I learn so much from you 😊

[@kalpufranc3596]

Thank you very much. GOD bless you

[@lourdessantiago689]

Thank you Dr. Stanley. I need more of these. I hope you would have more on this topic.

[@darciee.7337]

This is very helpful, thank you.

[@ignaciatorres5837]

Thank you for this teaching!

[@r.sylvan8888]

Thank you so much. Very wise words

[@AnaGarcia-ib7in]

These information really helped!!

[@ecgodsmack86]

Good Advice brother Amen.

[@rhondal8887]

This was great!

[@mollyhughes7609]

Awesome , helps alot.

[@Skeeterweezer]

This brought me into tears...

[@zanotube6567]

Davanale Paul McMurrin I seen your comment and I was wondering why till the video hit 2:54🙏🏼

[@curlysue3840]

Thank you.

[@junamaeperez4173]

This is very much helpful. Thank you so much!

[@danielaanderson2240]

Excellent love Dr.Stanley always excellent teaching God bless him

[@starblazers01]

Thx for sharing

[@vanessarodriguez9400]

Give me all of that again please!!!!! Thanks

[@reverendministerlady]

Excellent advice Dr Charles Stanley. Thank you so much! I'm going to write for the sermon on this!

[@adivolau4448]

Thanks really helpful

[@1BlueStarRising]

Thank You for sharing :-)

[@einsteinzvice517]

:-) I have enjoyed several of Dr. Stanley's lectures now. I love his voice!

[@Funmise-World.]

Very helpful thank you Sir. your messages has been of great blessing.

[@rickywilliams687]

Amazing

[@ruenaribeiro6676]

Thank you very much.... Very informative... Every single point. God bless you

[@vigneswary197]

Thank you

[@troycumberbatch8726]

Bless bless

[@jenniferlynnschlomer8387]

As a mom thank you for advice! Thank you for being so strait forward! God bless. And God bless all mommies and daddies.

[@ruwanthiwijesinghe5980]

Thank you so much for this wonderful, Godly advice. It helped my situation so much. God bless your ministry!

[@shovakarki9089]

Thank you Dr Stanley for such a great sermon. If I heard this sermon while I became mother. 🤔

[@sandrasquires4217]

So powerful, great principals. Thank you

[@rachellehansen4549]

incredible

[@garretmount8409]

I really needed this , thank you 🙏

[@trevorbaptista3430]

PRAISE JESUS.

[@StaceyWilliamshome868]

I purposely went looking for some words on this topic. Just this morning my teen and I got into a physical fight, Something I was desperately trying to avoid. Because my mother and I had that kind of relationship with me as an adult. I thought I was doing it right, that God saved me just in time to no mimic the same relationship my mom and I had. She said some hurtful things and I know some of it is just rebelling teen season but other times I'm like "no the enemy will not have her mind." I try to teach her and show her she's beautiful and accepted and do things with her spend time with her etc but it seems like she's taking it for granted.I'm not going to lie when she's disrespectful. I do want to pop her in the mouth, she does it on purpose and gets upset when she gets disciplined. I have a short temper for disrespect. I think it's time to see a Christian psychologist. Because it's not just a typical teen problem, it's more that I really need her to speak to someone about it. There was an 8-year gap in our being together from 8-16. I think I too need to sit with a psychologist about it.

[@yvonneoakes550]

Awesome

[@rickywilliams687]

Good job bro

[@zealheals]

7:33 🗝 never told this before, but makes sense

[@torystrending7285]

Amen!!

[@berenicevasquez716]

Please teach more about how to dr deal with teens . Please Dr. STANLEY THANK YOU🙏☝️

[@sugarsauce2435]

You brought tears to my eyes. THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH. I'm struggling. Big time. Especially with the internet and the instantly connected world. I need spiritual guidance on parenting. I'm struggling with the sheltering... Not telling the child the truth about this world around them. Please pray for my family and myself. I need serious guidance right now. If anyone has any idea of someone I can talk with, any kind of resources, I gladly accept any guidance and recommendations people may have. I feel like this literally could affect my children's lives in a way that is or can be EXTREMLY harmful to them. I'm scared to death that they will become 30yrs old, refusing to get a job or get their own place, because they can't handle people... Please pray for us. I've been in deep prayer about this. I literally feel as though I'm fighting for their lives.

[@jordanivester6953]

The Bible,, Now that were a family podcast (here on KZbin) Nancy Campbell, this mamas house, this mamas faith (also both on KZbin) M is for Mama - a book by Abbie Halberstadt, Loving the little years and Fit to burst, both books by Rachel Jankovic

[@angelellul4519]

Apart of his Christianity, I admire Dr Stanley a lot for his perfect use of English. I particularly hate that people say kids when they refer to human beings made in God's image. Notice in this that he never uses the word kid (young goat).

[@netragurung684]

Plz teach me more

[@yuimishaiza8551]

My Christian parents did all the above

[@enlightenedwarrior7119]

My dad's discipline was beating me with a belt yes I was bad and did some messed up things but it seems I just got worse and worse and has not helped me very much as an adult when I talk to him he wants to lecture me but does not lead me just says you need to do this and that but does not show me how

[@alexiamilanovski]

❤

[@user-ze8lk7yl3s]

😃 your right ❤❤❤❤ amén