How can I forgive myself and others? | Thich Nhat Hanh answers questions

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Күн бұрын

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@onefordespair 2 жыл бұрын

I am grateful to have been alive at the same time that we were able to record his incredible lectures. And so grateful that I stumbled upon him on KZbin by accident. I know he's just a human like us but his wisdom seems to come from somewhere beyond and it's always so touching and true to hear. I was an active drug user and alcoholic when I first heard his teaching and I have to give his words some of the credit for helping me find the strength, peace and self-respect to quit and the courage to face my problems and pain with a clear head.

@adirondacktrekking1972 2 жыл бұрын

It’s amazing how timing plays such a crucial part of our lives ,”I” too had stumbled across our teacher on KZbin, I took 10or so minutes to watch his lesson and it literally has changed me forever! I was 48 at the time and now I realize I was always meant to have this practice of mindfulness and inter being ,but I wasn’t going to be receptive until my latter years ,I now realize that now ,and it was well worth the wait ✨🙏✨

@readingsbycara 2 жыл бұрын

*Love* ♥️ FREEDOM 💚 Unity 💖 *Forgiveness* 🥰

@alexandradewinter3374 2 жыл бұрын

Grattitude, sorrow, tears. because Thay touches my hart. I also stumbeled upon his teachings here on the tube. And after 2 years of sadness' loneliness, anger and not understanding, now I have arrived. In the here and now. And I feel.this is my path for the rest of my life. No longer therapy, anger, but learning and following the teachings of the Buddha with the help of Thay's legacy. Namaste

@suzywalsh7906 2 жыл бұрын

There are no accidents. I’m so glad you found healing. ♥️

@profplum5 2 жыл бұрын

Well done on getting clean, it ain’t easy

@mbeth4095 2 жыл бұрын

The Vietnam soldier's past harmful, haunting action is referred to by therapists who treat PTSD as a moral injury... which causes harm to other sacred beings and most often goes against our own core being / spiritual beliefs... Easier to forgive others who contributed to our own personal suffering... much more difficult to forgive ourselves for causing suffering (and or death) to other living sentient beings... I cannot see it done other than through the path Thay so graciously and compassionately teaches here... I find this teaching about unskillful means and developing skillful means, the work of tranformation which includes restitution, restoration and reconciliation and conscious, compassionate,, meaningful service in some manner ... so healing and hopeful... Thank you Thay and Plum Village for sharing... 🙏

@jacquedaw 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you, this gave me greater understanding and showed me what was missing in a lot of other forgiveness videos.

3 жыл бұрын

I have cried listening to this short talk. I was reminded that if the soldier was able to forgive himself, I am too. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing, existing, teaching us how to carry it all.

@irenashiloh8808 2 жыл бұрын

He deliberately murdered the children. Of course he forgave himself -- evil people don't feel guilt for too long. He was just uncomfortable seeing himself as the bad guy so he went to a retreat and decided after 4 days he was an angel again.

@GallumA 2 жыл бұрын

@@irenashiloh8808 an evil person wouldn't need an excuse to save face. he'd simply never tell anyone, and continue living perfectly happily, don't you think?

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

To give is to be deprived of what is yours. To pardon is to suffer loss. To forgive is to receive injury. Truth without mercy is a terror. Mercy without truth is a lie. Love encompasses both. God is Love. "All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth" (Psalm 25)

@jacquedaw 2 жыл бұрын

@@irenashiloh8808 Have you any idea of what pain and ignorance drives a young man in vietnam who has just seen all his friends and comrades get killed, to do an act like this?. I have read this story elsewhere, it was years afterwards that he still couldn't sleep or be around children and he absolutely tortured himself for what he did. That is not the actions of an evil man, and then he went off and worked to save children. The world is not black and white, good and evil. So you think you can do the work of God, deny someone forgiveness or repentance, and damn them to hell for all eternity? I hope there is a time in your life that you will need forgiveness and that you will then find the qualities of kindness, compassion, forgiveness and non judgement that you lack.

@daevaskye 2 жыл бұрын

@@irenashiloh8808 "Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone"

@starseed45 3 жыл бұрын

21 years ago I did something I still cry about every day even though I have been completely forgiven but after listening to this video I now see how I can accept the forgiveness and heal. How can I ever thank you. God bless

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@Roscoe.P.Coldchain 2 жыл бұрын

Yeah I did something terrible to a family member who is no longer hear now, I went to prison and thought when I come out I could move on but day by day the guilt is strangling me..I’ve been a recluse and punished myself for the last ten years..I stumble upon this guy just yesterday and I’m hoping I can find some peace in his words 🫶✝️

@hardyblues2194 2 жыл бұрын

@@Roscoe.P.Coldchain I wish you alot of healing along the journey. My past has also catched up to me lately. Gladly I was saved by god and nobody got hurt. But I still feel shame and guilt for having the intention to follow throught with it.

@rahule73 Жыл бұрын

@@Roscoe.P.Coldchain Your heart is pure and supreme Buddha knows you have accepted your mistake. You are venerable my friend. Be Happy and help others. Do read this book " How to Stop worrying and start living " which has lots of real experience of real people overcoming suffering :)

@mernawells7839 9 ай бұрын

What a truly beautiful human being and teaching. I cannot imagine going through the horror happening in the world and the pain within without his help. For me he was the highest luvubg Saint or enlightened being of our time as he really knew suffrrubgxand how to transform it. Thankyou Thay you will akways be in my heart.

@Greggorious123 3 жыл бұрын

This is one of the most profound talks I’ve ever heard.

@dongliwu3454 2 жыл бұрын

I cried while I listened to him the whole time. I cried for the soldier, and I cried for my mother and myself. Two years ago since my mom passed away, I had been frequently going to High View Park to practice Taichi or take a walk. I looked at the sky and said "Mami, are you here with me?" I could not go back to see her since February 2019. I used to hate her and for my whole life I had been trying to run away from her. Now I understand what happened to her and what made her became like a monster for me and the family after I got sick and had done a lot of research. I began to feel I have mercy on her and regret for what I had said to hurt her badly. I am so grateful that Master has shown me a way how to make peace with my mom. Mami is still alive in my gene. I want to practice mindfulness and see her smile to me. Mami, I love you. Master, thank you :)

@sanyrenita Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry for your lost. If I may ask, what's happened to her and your family?

@luciamixon4156 10 ай бұрын

Probably ruined. I can relate but so far I am not healed. Rough. Complicated. Process of reconciliation...sad...it didn't have to be this way. That is what makes it incomprehensible. Providence?

@kp74952 2 жыл бұрын

Wow. I have seen a lot of content on self-forgiveness, but this is one of the most powerful. He truly is a wise and masterful teacher. I appreciate that he chose an example of something so dark and heavy - most people talk about forgiving yourself for eating a bowl of ice cream or saying something embarrassing. This is real stuff.

@ronaldocapote6828 2 жыл бұрын

@richardparka3321 2 жыл бұрын

Great Saint of our time. If millions of ppl. just took 2% of these healing teachings, the path to collective healing of our world becomes unstoppable. Peace

@leanh4435 3 жыл бұрын

“Everyone learns from our own mistakes and unskillfulness”. “The mindfulness helps transform and heal”. 🙏🙏🙏. I’m always grateful to Thầy and Plum Village’s Sangha.

@leanh4435 3 жыл бұрын

🙏🌻🙏

@leanh4435 3 жыл бұрын

🙏🌻🙏

@floryniculescu 3 жыл бұрын

I love this man. ♥️ I bless him, he had tremendous contribution to my spiritual evolution 🙏

@fernandasimonelli9699 2 жыл бұрын

Traduzione in italiano

@Allegra11 Жыл бұрын

I don't know whether this will help but thank you for this. I cried listening to it. I'm wracked with guilt and have been for over 10 years. My life has virtually come to a standstill. Your words touched me deeply and I will try to forgive myself by realising my beautiful mum lives on in me.

@damianwaynerobin5984 2 жыл бұрын

I needed to hear this today because I did such horrible things today like saying vile things to my mother who’s shown me nothing by kindness. Now I feel so guilty that I start to hate myself. This video has given me the strength to try and forgive myself as my mother already has.

@sbeckwit 4 ай бұрын

Grandma, I am so sorry that I did not appreciate your love. Please forgive me. I was young and weak. I have become stronger now. I know that you loved me more than anyone. I love you Grandma. I love you.

@philmaturanodrums 3 жыл бұрын

Yeaayyyyy hes got proper mics finally! Every word is gold and should be heard nicely! Thank you Plum village!

@danny92980 3 жыл бұрын

God bless you my friend 🙏

@chilldragon4752 3 жыл бұрын

He's such an amazing guy, and very smart on how to use his words to teach peace. He has suffered a stroke and can no longer speak but he still teaches through his books and the recordings.

@Nancysoulshine 3 жыл бұрын

When did he suffer a stroke?

@christytran4495 3 жыл бұрын

@@Nancysoulshine sending prayers love light and energy to this beautiful wise master. When did he get a stroke? Best wishes

@espianmashias9565 3 жыл бұрын

😱😱😱

@scheibermartin738 2 жыл бұрын

He passed away this year.

@saskiazaaura 3 жыл бұрын

I'm a Moslem and watching this video. After that , i really get inspiration to forgive myself before i reconcile friendship with him. I have been realized , i should forgive and reconcile myself for now not cried over fought and conflict with him at past. As everyone should. God bless you Mr Thich Nhat Hanh , your lesson is useful to me (y)

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@yitpinglam5468 2 жыл бұрын

A man of so much wisdom and compassion. May his teaching spread far and wide.

@jacquedaw 2 жыл бұрын

Someone in the comments section mentioned 'moral injury' in relation to what the veteran experienced here. I found this article, here are some excerpts which I think describe why Thay's work here with the veteran was so successful when no other methods of forgiveness could be. (this is not full article and I would recommend reading the full article, I just picked the bits relevant to this video) “Opening a Door to a New Life”: The Role of Forgiveness in Healing From Moral Injury Natalie Purcell1,2*, Brandon J. Griffin1, Kristine Burkman1,3 and Shira Maguen1,3 What Does Forgiveness Have to Do With Moral Injury? Wounds to the spirit or soul1 can be among the most devastating and enduring wounds of war. In recent decades, scholars have worked to characterize these moral wounds and to describe their impact on the lives of military veterans (10-12). From their work, we have learned that veterans can be ashamed, alienated, and disillusioned after returning from war, sometimes questioning their worth and goodness as human beings. Combat veterans can feel like war awakened their “dark side”-a “beast” or a “monster” that remains within, belying any sense of the self as a good person, a kind spouse or parent, a gentle and caring friend (5). Some morally injured veterans engage in years, even decades, of self-punishing behavior, often with only a vague sense of what is driving it. Some sabotage their relationships, employment, or other sources of potential happiness, feeling that they don't deserve anything positive or fulfilling in life. They may find themselves emotionally numb or racked with anger or despair that has no clear cause or target. Those with the most serious moral wounds isolate themselves from intimate relationships and avoid people and things that once had meaning for them, sometimes losing themselves in the haze of drugs, alcohol, or prescription medications (5, 13, 14). Some consider ending their own lives, and some ultimately do so (15). We argue that, when the wounds that one suffers from are indeed moral wounds-when the guilt and shame consuming one's conscience stem from actions that one took or failed to take in war-the healing process must involve moral growth and reconciliation. Here, we speak of a reconciliation between the values one wants to hold and the actions one has taken; between the person one wants to be and the person one has been; between the ethos of a soldier at war and that of a veteran who has returned home. As Father Keating suggests, the process of reconciliation begins only when one looks at his own actions with eyes wide open (1). If he assesses that he did in fact make choices or take actions that are not compatible with the person he wants to be, we argue that he must seek and find forgiveness before he can heal. What Sort of Forgiveness is Attainable and Meaningful? “I hated myself for what I did and all these years I've taken that hatred with me.”-combat veteran, IOK study We speak of forgiveness as a process of emotional growth, release, and transformation that can facilitate reconciliation in the aftermath of a significant moral violation. It is an active, morally-engaged process that requires both acceptance and change. As Webb et al. (16) have written, “Forgiveness occurs over time and is a deliberate, volitional process involving a fundamental shift in affect, cognition, and/or behavior;” this shift entails releasing “ill will… without condoning, excusing, or denying the transgression(s)” (p. 220). Whether forgiveness is needed and, also, what sort of forgiveness is necessary and meaningful, is a deeply personal matter and one that often requires painful exploration of the consequences of one's actions and the harm done to others. Sometimes, a veteran will feel that he needs the forgiveness of those he harmed or killed in combat; sometimes, the forgiveness of his God or a higher power; sometimes, the forgiveness of loved ones he has alienated after returning home. But the veteran is likely to find no clear subject who is positioned to forgive the combat actions at the heart of his moral injury. After all, who can and should offer forgiveness for wrongs committed against anonymous others half a world away-others who may be alive or dead? We contend that, with whomever else a veteran feels he must reconcile, the heart of healing from moral injury is a process of forgiving the self -that is, of reaching an inner reconciliation where one acknowledges and attempts to makes amends for any harm done, while also recognizing the self as a fallible person engaged in continuing moral growth and development. For Cornish and Wade (17): “[S]elf-forgiveness [is] a process in which a person (a) accepts responsibility for having harmed another; (b) expresses remorse while reducing shame; (c) engages in restoration through reparative behaviors and a recommitment to values; and (d) thus achieves a renewal of self-respect, self-compassion, and self-acceptance” (p. 97). Here, self-forgiveness is definitively not about excusing one's actions, explaining them away, or simply forgetting them and moving on. That would constitute an inauthentic forgiveness that is not compatible with healing from true moral wounds and can, instead, compound or prolong moral injury. Authentic or genuine self-forgiveness, by contrast, is an often-painful process that entails a moral reckoning as the precondition for spiritual growth and renewal (18, 19). The word “process” is central to our understanding of self-forgiveness. It is not an act or a gesture, but an emotional and behavioral regeneration that requires moral engagement and change Moral guilt is often conceptualized as a constructive negative emotion-one that can catalyze behavioral change and lead to personal growth. Guilt is, in fact, an important precursor to the transformational experience of authentic self-forgiveness (21). Yet, when guilt becomes an enduring, global criticism of one's self and one's behavior-when guilt becomes indistinguishable from chronic shame-it is no longer associated with affirmative change, amends-making, or personal growth. It can become, instead, a source of moral paralysis and other psychological and behavioral problems, including the self-punishing behaviors associated with moral injury (18, 22). This is often the case among morally injured veterans, who can become locked in patterns of self-hatred, self-condemnation, and self-punishment, perceiving no way out (5, 23). The source of this moral quicksand, we argue, is an inability to see any path toward the reconstitution of a self-worthy of respect and love-a morally intact self. When a veteran has committed, in his or her eyes, a wrong so significant that it defines the moral self and cannot be corrected, it may seem like there is no viable path forward. At this juncture, to broach the topic of self-forgiveness is to introduce the possibility that such a path can be forged and to suggest that the guilty party must take the first active steps to forge it. For the morally injured and ashamed veteran to take those steps, he or she must first understand the meaning of authentic self-forgiveness and have some sense of the process that it entails. The veteran must also recognize self-forgiveness as distinct from the morally stagnant practices of excusing or condoning one's actions-practices already rejected by those who are sincerely remorseful. There are extraordinary barriers to reaching even this modest starting point. Those barriers may include the veteran's sincere convictions that some acts are unforgivable, that only victims can forgive, or that forgiving is tantamount to letting oneself off the proverbial hook. Ideas about self-forgiveness are often embedded in one's cultural, spiritual, or familial background, and some veterans may resist the concept itself, believing that self-forgiveness is meaningless or self-indulgent, or perhaps that forgiveness can come only from a higher power. Even those who embrace the concept may confront other barriers, including obstacles to making direct amends to those harmed by their actions in combat. Ironically, the veteran's own recognition and articulation of these barriers can provide evidence of an intact moral self that belies the image of the self as an irredeemable moral failure In our work, we have found that the core components of the self-forgiveness process-accepting responsibility, cultivating self-compassion, making amends, and reconstructing an intact moral identity-are near-universal steps on the pathway through and beyond moral guilt. For most veterans, recognition and reaffirmation of violated values, such as respect for the sanctity and dignity of human life, are essential to the process. So too is reparative work to make right what was wrong

@veganvocalist4782 3 жыл бұрын

Humbled by this truth , thought I was forgiving but lately I have been in a battle with this part of my development, thank you 🙏

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@synapse501 3 жыл бұрын

Wonderful, practical example to free yourself from the shackles of the past wrong actions, and acute guilt feelings. Very impressive.

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@HaiHoang-xx4pk 3 жыл бұрын

Though I heard this story from one of Thay's books, it brought me to tears listening to him. What a river of wisdom! Thank you for sharing and many thanks to Thay again and again.

@marciabernard3820 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much. I'm having a hard time forgiving myself.my mom passed away I gave her so much trouble..I just see wish she was still alive..I love her so much n Miss her.. no one ever love me like my mom. Writing in years. Thank you.

@foreveryactionthereisacons1683 3 жыл бұрын

I'm sorry for your loss, Losing a parent is so difficult on the heart. Keep talking to your mom. They aren't as far away as it seems. I hope you have many dream visitations 💜💙💜💫🙏

@foreveryactionthereisacons1683 3 жыл бұрын

"they" as in loved ones who have passed I should of typed.

@marciabernard3820 3 жыл бұрын

@@foreveryactionthereisacons1683 thanks

@elinannestad5320 3 жыл бұрын

same.

@kathymichaels2108 3 жыл бұрын

Hi Marcia. We ALL give our parents trouble. You haven't lost your mum. We don't die. Only the body dies. There are many resources that can help you. Hacking the afterlife on quora is a great place to start. You can connect with your mum in many ways.

@edgarmorales4476 Жыл бұрын

You forgive yourself your mindset, your thoughts, words and actions because you are in the world, restrained and blinded by the Ego (the guardian of individuality). You struggle bravely to adopt a more unconditionally loving way to think, feel and respond to every experience, but while you remain the single moving force within your consciousness, the Ego (the guardian of individuality) will eventually win. You forgive others the same way. For what is true forgiveness? It is the state of understanding yourself/others and your/their reasons for your/their behavior so clearly that you can say in all honesty - there is nothing to forgive.

@earthpearl3790 3 жыл бұрын

I can see the potential for this practice in my life and in our world. We’ve been taught not to do harm, now we are learning how to “undo” the harm we may have done. It is through action.🔆

@annjenkinson7988 3 жыл бұрын

In gratitude xxx

@lucysanchez4577 2 жыл бұрын

Words of Wisdom 🙏🙏🙏

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

"learning how to “undo” the harm we may have done. It is through action" ---- I agree. But what of those harms which cannot be undone?

@lukesapir1590 2 жыл бұрын

@@andrewferg8737 tldr: "Just give up there's no hope" doesn't ever feel like a productive answer to me, but neither does "it'll be all good stop worrying about it". I prefer a balanced approach. While you can't undo certain harms that are terrible and absolute in nature (we all can think of something like that), you can learn to live in a way that is both aware of the possibility of such harm so you can avoid it going forward while simultaneously not torturing yourself emotionally. It's very, very difficult but possible. We live in a world that may at times seem to undermine humanity's will to live on purpose, but the way I see it, if a person gives in to despair they might as well not have faced the problem at all; i.e. crumbling to despair and endless cycles of regret can be even more destructive than denial. I think what's key for people to move past and redeem harms that can't be undone is the ability to face regrets in way that is thorough but also doesn't cause us implode psychologically, so that we repair what we can going forward and learn to never repeat history. IDK that's the best answer I got at 2 PM man. If u feel like there's anything I didn't cover pls lemme know, I think it's also good to share beliefs for the sake of improving beliefs.

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@@lukesapir1590 "Just give up there's no hope" doesn't ever feel like a productive answer to me, but neither does "it'll be all good stop worrying about it" ----- I agree. As a Christian I also take to heart the Psalmist's reflection that "all the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth" (Psalm 25). Truth without mercy is a terror. Mercy without truth is a lie. Love encompasses both. God is Love. Christ is God made manifest. Peace be with you.

@Deeeepsea-j5m 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you dear Thay for this particular teaching on forgiveness. My partner of 15 years had recently passed away pretty quickly from cancer, and i have been feeling so remorseful for not loving him well enough. We had many fights, and i had used unskillful words in our disagreements. I have been crying a lot…and wonder if i can forgive myself. I miss him a lot now. And your teachings dear Thay, and the sangha are my solace. My aspiration is to learn more and practice more and to try and heal.🙏❤️🙏

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@jacquedaw 2 жыл бұрын

I haven't been able to forgive myself for something, I just listened to a whole load of different forgiveness videos, but they all just kept saying, it's a lesson, toss the guilt away... but I knew my guilt was justified and just trying to toss it away wasn't possible and wasn't honouring the wrongness of my actions. I couldn't diminish it by saying 'oh well, lesson learned'. Hearing about the soldier, I thought, if he thought he was worthy of forgiveness, then so am I, but I do think there needs to be repentance and a change of behaviour, an aspiration to do better, a moral restitution and making amends. Thank you, he was a true saint, just seeing the kindness in his eyes and lack of judgement was healing.

@justindavis7928 Жыл бұрын

I am so thankful to find this right now. God has given me the time and space to reflect and see myself in all parts and heal the toxicity in me. I was blind to it and I want to forgive myself for not seeing the blessings right in front of me in opportunities and people. I hope to heal my relationships and give back to my home community more. I am learning to let go of who I thought I was and removing my attachments that continue to bring the past with me in the present moment. I am so thankful that the true reality is love and forgiveness and I am excited to work on my right view and mental concentration. The world needs us to love. P.s I highly Recommend the Plum Village Podcast called "The Way Out is In".

@plumvillageonline Жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing your aspiration! May that be your nourishment and motivation in good & bad times.

@veritaslegionis777 2 жыл бұрын

I prayed to God yesterday for guidance, and here I am today 🙏

@anushaheed1346 3 жыл бұрын

Omg i so needed this 🙏🏿 my mom passed recently..i feel so guilty

@Somebodysomewheresometime 2 жыл бұрын

My mother was a born again Christian and she’s never visit because i had a Buddha painting in my house. We were very different to say the least. As I teen and her a single mother, I put her through hell. Told her I hated her etc. She passed in 2014 (suicide in a way for fasting 55 days). I am the last one alive in my family, I arranged her cremation. I saw her body and didn’t believe it was her - she was so thin and did not look how I’d remembered her. My best friend was with me and pointed out her lips and eyebrows - I have the same- which I’d never realized until then. I wrote a letter to put in with her body and read it aloud to my best friend - sobbing with sadness and regret. As I said the words “now you are free to be the little girl you were never allowed to be” - she was molested as a child - a double rainbow was painted over the ocean with lavender skies (her favorite color) and lightening under the rainbow. It stayed for an hour I think. I knew at that time she was still here and that was a sign for me. She’s still here - tell her. We are never gone forever. Sending you love and healing❤️

@davidmatta2727 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for showing us the way for true repentance and healing. Yes, I was very unskillful many times, hurt others and was not aware of the suffering I inflicted until I heard you in this. May you live long and stay with us helping many.

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@domcannon6403 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for uploading this Plum Village and thank you Thay for your boundless, pure and impartial compassion. ☸❤🙏

@karenlacy8950 3 жыл бұрын

Such a wise man. Blessings to him

@ramdhiwakarseetharaman5989 2 жыл бұрын

This talk gave me lot of hope to free me from the sins I have made. Thanks Plum Village.

@christina7561 2 жыл бұрын

What a story, Jesus. Here's to redemption and freedom from all suffering. Don't give up.

@lorriheffner2747 2 жыл бұрын

I made a contribution to Unicef for children in Yemen in Thay’s Honor. ❤️

@eequalsemceeprayer Жыл бұрын

This really, really helps. Thank you, dear teacher. I have recently hurt somebody I love very deeply with actions that I now recognize as self-centered, destructive and wrong, leaving me with a very painful feeling of remorse that's like burning in hell. His pointers towards how to heal the past through the present and future, the power of renouncing unskillful means with beneficial actions ... very practical, empowering, inspiring and beneficial. This helps me. Thank you thank you thank you. Om.

@100Denario 2 жыл бұрын

People punish themselves in accordance with their own guilty feelings. Everyone we meet on the outside is just a mirror of things taking place on the inside and all abusive relationships begin with low-self worth, and guilt fueling them. In order to let other people off the hook, you first have to learn to let yourself off the hook because without self-compassion, where is there any for anyone else? In self-punishment fueled by guilt, where is there room for gratitude? One mad man can create many mad men, many mad men create madness. Guilt is a problem emotion because all it does is produce madness. Remorse and reconciliation are the keys and there is a fine line between them and guilt. I believe we will evolve beyond the need for guilt as a whole race. What aspect of nature do we superimpose morality onto, especially guilt, outside of human affairs? None. Why superimpose it onto other people? Especially when all it creates is more chaos. Great video 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

@messenjah71 2 жыл бұрын

Forgiving others is how you forgive yourself. You learn to recognize that the pain you thought the other caused was in your own mind, but you projected blame on to them. And so you see their "sins" as your own shadow. Relinquish all defensiveness and attack and you have found your forgiveness.

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@SuprabhaSuzanne 2 жыл бұрын

He was such a beautiful light and he still is through his words, the videos and all those who try to walk the talk he, and other spiritual teachers, are always imparting to us. Thank you so much for this channel. May there be ease and healing and joy for all.

@sammyb5869 3 жыл бұрын

Wow ! These have to be, by far, the most powerful words of wisdom of all time. Thank you 💪💯

@lindastevens1548 2 жыл бұрын

Such purity and goodness. Thank you. And ever remembered and blessed. For us all.

@happylindsay4475 2 жыл бұрын

He is such a peaceful and beautiful soul. You will never be forgotten... 🙏🏼💗🙏🏼💗

@bastian6173 2 жыл бұрын

I can see parts of logotherapy in this answer. Healing through meaning. Wonderful

@ivonneigor 2 жыл бұрын

The most impressive powerful talk I have heard in my life!! Tears started rolling down my cheeks and it was impossible to stop them going down !! Many Thanks for making this video be possible for us to listen !!!

@adirondacktrekking1972 2 жыл бұрын

Beloved Thay ,you have transformed my life with your teachings of mindfulness.I smile to you teacher and I breathe with you 🙏

@51w2 2 жыл бұрын

Such a great Teacher. Full respect to Master Thich Nhat Hanh

@johndelamontaigne7711 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your loving kindness and all your teachings master Thay!

@MrKaufdan 3 жыл бұрын

Such a transformative teaching! Thank you. I aspire to help bring this loving compassionate energy into the world together with all those who've been fortunate enough to know Thay's example. Much love 🙏

@onefordespair 2 жыл бұрын

Did anyone hear what the name of the poison was that the soldier put in the sandwiches? I couldn't understand. But it's one I've never heard of before, I think. Anyways what Thay told Daniel about the children and how he could now go on to SAVE lives was so beautiful I almost cried. It's so true. We all have some kind of blood on our hands, even if only "energetic" because of mean or bad things we did or said to others in malice. What we can do is spread lovingkindness wherever possible. Help in any way you can anywhere, to all living beings great and small.

@sofiamarie9136 2 жыл бұрын

I think the word he used was, “explosives.” 🙏🏾

@sofiamarie9136 2 жыл бұрын

Though I just read another comment that said he might have meant to say the word, “poison,” that it could have been a simple language translation misunderstanding. 🙏🏾

@kenanklovitch8117 2 жыл бұрын

What a beautiful person, what a beautiful teaching, I feel myself healing with every video I listen to. Thank you.

@lindaengland6521 2 жыл бұрын

Tay's smile, his voice, his teachings are so wonderful. We were so lucky to have him. ❤️

@stephaniebenn2202 11 ай бұрын

Aspiration and volition can help transform our unskillfulness. Dear Thay, thank you.

@kimtaylor9096 3 жыл бұрын

How I love Thay. 🙏

@branchestarot 3 жыл бұрын

Gratitude, teacher. 🙏🏻❤️ Forgiving and learning.

@evelyne7071 3 жыл бұрын

To me, it is not an accident that last evening I was reading an article in Archeology magazine here in America (July/August 2021). In it, they wrote of having found a textile made 2,500 years ago by the Scythian nomads, who roamed in Russia, Kazakhstan and Mongolia. The designs was made from 1,250,00 knots, and is the oldest pile carpet in the world. But the amazing thing to me, is that, one of the design elements of this textile is the exact cross-shaped figure as the one on the textile behind teacher Thich Nhat Hanh…….Marvelous ! Thank you for your wisdom about forgiveness.

@LarsKing 2 жыл бұрын

What a touching talk. Powerful story about seeing the other healed inside of you as you forgive yourself and create healing in the world 🌎

@aliceschan68 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this touching, timeless and insightful teaching 🤗🤗🙏🙏💗💗 When I look into the cells of my body I can also find you now beloved teacher Thay 🙏🙏💗💗

@Rosco-P.Coldchain 9 ай бұрын

I struggle with so much guilt from my past..I say the serenity prayer m..God Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to now the difference ❤

@arslansultanbekov 6 ай бұрын

Stunning practical wisdom.

@thescoobymike Жыл бұрын

I really needed this. Thank you 😢❤

@acdebiase Жыл бұрын

Thay teachings still guide me everyday. 🙏

@patriziagentili1077 3 жыл бұрын

Meraviglioso. Grazie di cuore per la serenità che trasmetti.

@petertran8968 3 жыл бұрын

Depends on who and what they did! Forgiveness is not something you should give out freely, because some people doesn’t deserve it.

@sidstar1001 3 жыл бұрын

I Wonder about that as well... but then there is the amazing story of the soldier who killed 5 kids...

@petertran8968 3 жыл бұрын

@@sidstar1001 believe it or not but there are monsters that walked this world, it doesn’t matter how many messed up things they have done, they are always the victim and never did anything wrong, come across some of those people then you will be at the place I’m at.

@ethanlee-c3d 3 жыл бұрын

Sidenie where?

@Wan-Malaysia 2 жыл бұрын

If you aren't able to forgive, it's okay. Accept that is where you are. Befriend your unforgiveness, anger. Be present/mindful when it arises. Only you can choose what to hold on to and what to let go. No one can do that for you. The path you choose to take only you can tread it, no one else can. Be at peace. ❤

@marcusjackman1487 16 күн бұрын

Forgiveness isn't always about doing what is right for the perpetrator. Forgiveness is about liberating yourself. Carrying rancor, hatred and contempt for others is a slow and insidious poison that doesn't kill the perpetrator but it kills you.

@happyswim1836 2 жыл бұрын

Profound. Excellent assessment and discussion on healing and forgiveness. Love hearing these talks. Thank you for posting.

@matto8129 2 жыл бұрын

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!! So much love from the states.

@SBK_ALL_DAY 3 ай бұрын

Incredible, thank you

@nocturne8916 2 жыл бұрын

I find myself coming back and back to this video. Thank you Thay for your teaching. I hope one day I can achieve the state of yours.

@nocturne8916 Жыл бұрын

Oh wow apparently I haven’t improved but went backwards cuz I almost wanted to end my life today because of the guilt and shame.😅 but luckily I remembered this video and came back to it. It’s striking to me that we can be forgiven (not sure why I think I can’t be forgiven, I didn’t even kill anyone…)😢 “unskillful” is the right word; I feel much relieved. Hope I can do good to others and stop harming them.❤

@julong250 Жыл бұрын

@@nocturne8916 You are beautiful, kind and courageous. You can do so much more good things to yourself and others in your life. Please remember you are loved.

@bishop2051 2 жыл бұрын

This guy is incredible man.

@readingsbycara 2 жыл бұрын

Learn. *Love.* ♥️ Forgive. FREEDOM 💚 💖 💯 Love from Canada 🇨🇦

@readingsbycara 2 жыл бұрын

Transform. 🥰

@readingsbycara 2 жыл бұрын

*Love* ♥️ FREEDOM 💚 Unity 💖 *Forgiveness* 🥰

@readingsbycara 2 жыл бұрын

#staywell 💚

@何麗敏-n4n Жыл бұрын

感恩师父。感谢您无比珍贵的开示。非常疗愈。❤❤❤

@rsrsuo 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks 🙏 plum village for sharing the wisdom of this wonderful master and teacher. I subscribed to your channel and have made it part of my daily learning. 😃

@saturninealiem6745 3 жыл бұрын

Image the how good is the heart of someone that *regrets some words*. Compare this to people that *never regrets* being bad in really damages caused.

@hughslevin7120 3 жыл бұрын

@Attila Beres very wise and insiteful

@sidstar1001 3 жыл бұрын

@Attila Beres Brilliant and inspiring words that have helped me go deeper into the message of healing the video conveys. thx

@JulianS1401 2 жыл бұрын

When I heard the word 'we're human being' I'm crying 🙏

@melodyst.claire5389 3 жыл бұрын

🙏😌❤❤❤❤💐 Thank you for sharing this amazing healing process🙏❤💐

@bisyuntan1 3 жыл бұрын

I am studing the book of the biography of Sree Buddha..written by you Great Teacher 🌹.. I feel you always very near to me along with Buddha, though physically I'm far away. Thank you for the modern gadgets..🙏🏻

@chrispaquette7513 2 жыл бұрын

Prison, figuratively and literally, is the idea that the past is fixed.

@himachali_trekkerz 2 жыл бұрын

Always very grateful for your teachings n show the skillful n right path of life .. Master 😊💐💝

@brent6518 2 жыл бұрын

Powerful truths and paths of healing from the master!

@ronnyreneraveen 3 жыл бұрын

This made me cry. Thank you ❤

@lostballintallgrass1 2 жыл бұрын

We have to learn a new way. Being alone with your thoughts is just that. All alone with no human company. Same with anxiety about the future. Whatever it is we need to reconcile in our lives it has to be done in this life and in the present moment. That’s where all life and healing takes place.

@susiekube 2 жыл бұрын

I.love.this.man. and his spirit❣

@oso4491 3 жыл бұрын

He's my favorite sprintul teacher

@fattidiliberta 3 жыл бұрын

this is BEING hope....

@rethinking2023 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you respected Thay ❤️ i appreciate that lecture so much day by day, PV Dharma talks give me deep insight, reflection and slow go into awareness with feelings of joy....a new quality of consciousness is born 🙏

@williambilly3269 3 жыл бұрын

Great guy

@nanynobreli 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you ! Obrigada 🙏

@andrewferg8737 2 жыл бұрын

@MaiPham-rr9se 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much Thay! And thanks so much for sharing this video!

@Butterflywing369 2 жыл бұрын

I am sad that happened to you my friend thank you for sharing with me how about that and also how to relieve the suffering others and myself and the 4 Nobel truths about ❤️ love

@Butterflywing369 2 жыл бұрын

Also, to expand on that part about forgiveness if you find it difficult to forgive others for hurting you, just try to forgive yourself. Close your eyes see yourself standing at a pool of water it can be a creek, a lake, a waterfall etc... and tell yourself I forgive you for not being able to forgive others. Do this as many times as you need until you can look at the person you need to forgive and say I forgive you wholeheartedly 🙏