How Grief and Loss Affects the Brain

Has Grief Hijacked your Brain?? You aren't losing your mind!!
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[@grieftherapist]

Let's normalize and accept the messiness of Grief!! Share your messy moment so we can support one another!! 🙏🏻❤️

[@JudithMathis-qb3qj]

Body aches, headache, fatigue, and feelings of confusion

[@raew5263]

Two years later still feel like I’m in a fog; insomnia, anxiety going out in public, isolation, mixed up days. The list goes on. Grief is such a strange experience; crying comes so easily. Broken heart 💔+ broken brain. 😢

[@MidnightsunAtFoto]

Also two years in… Same feelings, so sorry you have to go through this as well… 😢 Sending Love ❤

[@raew5263]

@@MidnightsunAtFoto Thank you 🙏🏻 for your kind words of support. Same blessings to you. One day at a time…

[@jojogurl83021]

I actually got in shower with my clothes on! 😲 Lost my Mom 😢 almost a year ago on August 30 😢. This whole year has been awful without her! 🙏❤️

[@chrisannjacobs8979]

In March it will be 2 years since I lost my husband of 40 years. I still experience brain fog. We had no children so now I live alone. It's a lot to have to adjust to. I am constantly forgetting things I've been told by family members. I've gotten to the point of saying "No I don't remember you telling me that, but that doesn't mean you didn't". I'm constantly loosing (misplacing) things and waste inordinate amounts of time looking for them; phone, keys, purse and etc. I now have a check list that I put at my door, in my car, at my Bible fellowship etc to help me remember. This is so unlike me. I've always been such a focused person even to a fault sometimes. This second year of grief has been harder to navigate than the first year, I think mainly because the first year I was in shock and numb and now the reality of his absence has truly begun to sink in. Thank you for these wonderfully helpful vidoes! I'm so glad to have stumbled across you!

[@christinagutierrez7694]

I could have written your post. I have always been grateful for the brain I had. Now it seems like dementia is knocking at the door.

[@wendybreeze1749]

Yes. Every word.

[@paulinecraig1327]

My thoughts exactly my husband passed 2 years this March the second year is sooo hard 😢 sending kind wishes x

[@paulinecraig1327]

​@christinagutierrez7694 This is my second year without my husband I totally understand how u feel xx

[@1800bluemink]

I have experienced all of these. And continue to. I feel like I am absolutely losing my mind some days. My husband’s death has almost sent me over the edge. I would have never believed it if I wasn’t first hand experiencing it. I am so sick of hearing about everyone else’s plans & what they are doing. I cannot stand being around a lot of people anymore. Especially people I thought I loved…I’m glad I found you channel. Thank you

[@marshabowlin1757]

I am in the same boat with you it has been a year for me and I still have days I cry all day , keep my shades down don’t want to go out miss place things I thought it would be getting better but it is not I feel like I died the day he died 😭

[@moniclare4214]

That's exactly it the fear of being in territory that we never thought we would find ourselves in...its do damp scary !!

[@lbr1499]

Thank you for this video. I have lost six close family members and two friends since May of 2016. The three most traumatic were my mom who l had been a caregiver for 23 years, my one twin daughter in Dec 2021; and my only brother in March of 2022. I noticed how numb l’d become when my daughter died. Her sister and son were in such deep shock l didn’t realize l was too. I physically swallowing my grief for a year until l felt my other daughter had processed hers. I never had high BP until 6 months after my mom died. I just lost a nephew right before the holidays to suicide after being very ill and my brother in law last week. My crying is delayed. My focus is off. I’m a very much a people person but l feel so drained emotionally l don’t feel like l can help people anymore until l have more healing. My BP has gone up again after my brother passed. I gained weight because l didn’t care about taking care of me and was depressed but my friends thought l was okay because l could still be sociable sometimes and laugh. I don’t think they realized that was a coping mechanism. Sometimes l would get in the car and scream. Sometimes l would put my head in the pillow and scream so l could cry. It feels like there is a dam in me that hasn’t broken yet. I need to slowly process or l fear l’ll drown. I have a great faith in God and believe He is with me. I appreciate what you said about a broken brain because l don’t believe people understand it and that you need recovery time just like any illness.

[@rockygraziano5507]

I lost my wife four years ago after being together for twenty seven years and I’d started to believe that I was in the very early stages of dementia but having watched this it all makes sense.

[@moniclare4214]

It's a year and I'm still panicking that I'm not in control of every day practicalities . I am functioning on a primeval level in so many ways . It's frightening. Most of all its the reaction or non reaction of others that hurts

[@annekebrinkhof991]

I know what you mean, try one step at A time, and be gentle with yourself Other people just dont know what to say Very unfortunate

[@jennifersetser9091]

I feel the same way..some days I cope,others,I wake up feeling terribly sad and crying over everything I did or failed to do. Just keeping up with pets grandson and husband ,not very well, is the best I can do. Don’t want to bring anyone down,so I just avoid everyone those days.

[@moniclare4214]

@jennifersetser9091 that's the same for me, avoidance is becoming a way or pattern.... I looked it up... its definitely on the spectrum of depression which is a bummer...... I'm wondering.... if you and I take some of our paperwork etc to the library..... where its different atmosphere that we know and possibly adapt to.... plus take monies for teas drinking chocolates.... and a huge bag of m&m's to crunch on.... what do you think... it might pull our brain up.....????

[@andybreedlove]

How are you getting on a year later? I’m 2 years into this 🕊️

[@moniclare4214]

@andybreedlove . It's now spasmodic.. each day, I cry a bit and feel so lonely for him. When they say 'other half' it is true..half of oneself disappears... every single aspect of one's life is thrown to the wind!. I found myself smiling at the antics of my dogs yesterday and actually enjoying their antics... so other feelings are now popping up. It might be the that the warm weather..more sun equals higher serotonin levels ??. How are you getting on now? Do you feel any stronger?

[@marceapardus6526]

Thank you for describing the indescribable & giving grief tools to help bear the unbearable…big gratitude to the brave Grievers who comment, it is so comforting to hear similar situations, it helps me feel hope-full & take away the societal stigma. Grief Brain Fog is real & was very intense for me 3 to 6 months after the death of my beloved husband. I thought I was losing my mind! I consider myself strong & capable, but lots of the normal symptoms of deep grief brought me to my knees. Fortunately, Grief changes all the time, thus the ocean metaphor. I use the mantra, “right now, it’s like this” to cope. Blessings as we all journey on thru the Valley of Sorrow…

[@grieftherapist]

Thank you Marcea. I really like your ocean metaphor.🌊

[@TheRedhatsociety]

My dad died a year ago and my mother a month ago. I wish I had discovered this channel last year, but I guess the Teacher is coming when the Student is ready ❤ It is very helpful. I stopped fighting my brain fog, I accept that this is who I am now, and try to adjust life to it. My grief is heavy since I had good and loving relations with my parents, I miss talking to them and hugging them. Namaste 🙏🏼

[@insideoutbeauty3170]

Thank you for these amazing videos. My dad died 2 months ago suddenly. I had all these symptoms of fog. The worst moment was after being at my sisters for 5 weeks I tried to remember my address and was incapable of conjuring the numbers , I knew the street name but no longer remembered the numbers. I was freaked out. I had to text my fiancé so he could tell me.

[@grieftherapist]

Brain fog can be so ungrounding. We need to give ourselves space and time and practice.🙏🏻

[@valeriebatchelor7013]

I feel foggy alone and frightened. When will I feel normal again

[@simplyaj4006]

I am experiencing grief brain..my husband of almost 13 years passed away suddenly, I pray daily for strength and peace.

[@rachelr8837]

I felt very insulted inside when my family members were asking me to plan trips and go to events just after my dog died. I didn't want to challenge them on it, as I knew they were trying to help, but I obviously didn't have my party hat on at that time. It's been 7 months and I still have my bad days...losing a pet, no words for it...She was my child. 😢 Ty for your video.

[@AngelinaX23]

My brain is sharper than ever. I keep notes in a steno pad. I leave post-it reminders for myself. At the age of eight I watched my Grandma put herself into early senility with her endless grief over the loss of her oldest child, my Uncle Bill who died suddenly at the age of 32 leaving behind a wife and four children. I loved my grandmother, but I thought that to allow herself to deteriorate like that, especially when she had five other children and many, many grandchildren, who all loved her, was self-indulgent and inconsiderate. She lost all self-respect and that made me sad. Two months ago my youngest daughter was killed by her fiance. She was 48, a beautiful woman with hundreds of friends. I have experienced every possible manifestation of grief except brain fog. I want to grieve my daughter, I don't want my grief to make me crazy. I'mb 75. I don't know how much time I have left. I don't want to spend it staggering around in a state of semi-confusion. And I am certain that my daughter would not want that for me. She would tell me to be good to myself and to treat myself with the same love and respect that I would treat her.

[@maureenrees636]

No . She couldn’t help it. I too am going through losing my beloved husband, I’ve one daughter, she’s suffering too but I can’t seem to help , because if I start to connect with her grief, I’m afraid I’ll fall apart., I think about it all the time. She lives 5 hours away. We communicate daily. I’ll have to try ,see how she feels about my lack of communicating with her about our grief. Thank you . Please try to understand your grandmother.❤️

[@ftkinsella]

Yes I feel it all but mostly the lack of sleep and then a moment later I can’t make it up stairs to get in my (our) bed. My lack of sleep is really bothering me.

[@insideoutbeauty3170]

I have this also. I have been using melatonin supplements at night and it helps a lot.

[@AngelinaX23]

I tried everything. I finally broke down and got a prescription.

[@carolhovingh6877]

Absolutely have felt these symptoms. My family very upset with me over insignificant conversations. I don't care to have multiple conversations on the weather. I understand they mean well, but it was too much. I appreciate your videos very much, thank you.

[@grieftherapist]

Carol thank you for the support. I'm so glad my videos serve you.

[@oneawakenedsoul]

Thank you Jo for your guidance and prolific videos. I lost my girlfriend and soon to be fiancé to a car accident nearly three months ago. I'm devastated and heart broken, she was the one and now she'd gone. I don't know about brain fog, but I'm definitely disorganized and un motivated, sad and lonely without her.

[@jennycottrill1739]

I really appreciate your help with this touchy subject of grief. I lost my 28 year old daughter last year to suicide and I still have the brain fog strongly. It's so frustrating to not be able to find words and then totally forget what I was saying. I too, like so many on here, feel that too many people around are bothersome and then they don't know what to say or do when they do come around. Again I thank you for your help and the videos!

[@lynndrury3720]

I have all these symptoms. Now at least I know what i's all about. One of my biggest fears at the moment is driving my car. I feel so panicky.

[@grieftherapist]

You are right Lynn. Sometimes Grief is like rehab. It needs time patience and practice.🙏🏻

[@barbarabaker8118]

I was driving 4 days after my daughter unexpectedly & suddenly passed. I'm a safe driver, never have had an accident until then and was charged with carless driving. Grief also has a ripple effect. I don't feel confident making major designs. Since everyone viewing this app is united in our loss, I pray for each and everyone for comfort and for "His" Healing Grace.

[@martaperosio7846]

After losing my husband suddenly and dramatically my mind became a totally dysfunctional part of my body. Fortunately my middle child and youngest daughter volunteered to take care of me. I am almost normal functioning after more than a year but I still have more work to do. Hope to become me again sometime soon.

[@SoCalTresa77]

I currently have major brain fog. I relate to so many of those symptoms having lost my mom unexpectedly a month ago. I've been very frustrated with myself bc of this brain fo that I am not used to functioning with. You saying that it's not being weak or a fault of character really hit home for me. Understanding why it's happening really helps. Thank you!

[@grieftherapist]

I am glad this served you!!

[@SummerLuvinAlai]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am best freinds with my mom and I can't even imagine the pain that you are going through. Wishing you all the best. ❤️

[@jojogurl83021]

I'm so sorry for your loss! I loss my mom almost a year ago on August 30 Th. unexpected as well! 😢. It is the worse feeling in the world to loose your mom😭🙏.

[@alisontilling9066]

How long does grief fog last. I am definitely going through it. I lost my beautiful 8 year old son on 1 August 2022

[@raphaelklijn6358]

I lost one of my best friends a month ago. To me it seems like I am living in different dimensions at the same time. Multitasking is the worst. Preparing for work and at the same time making sure the kids are ready for school, is exhausting and requires so much mental energy. I have to consciously think what pictogram to touch to open my agenda on my phone (that I use ten times a day). Driving a car used to be fun and relaxing. Now it is really though and I feel drunk while driving. One time I just left my car and went home by foot, just because it felt unsafe to drive.

[@craftygirl17]

Can you tell me about grief and having a chronic illness, because what I’m feeling now with human loss is the same way I felt when diagnosed with diabetes, shock was the big one and cried a lot, someone said to me you are grieving your life and freedom that you had before your diabetes, I’ve read some things on grief and chronic illness. There needs to be more support in this type of grief.

[@carolynngosselin5749]

Jo, thank you. I lost Jennifer, my spouse of nearly 24 years in late October and my brain remains foggy. I would use another f word but this video has brought me to tears. I have been a mess these last months and while watching this vid I realized I 'very been more worried than I realize that I had dementia. When should I start worrying lol?

[@craftygirl17]

This is how I’m feeling right now, it’s been a long road, mom died 6 years ago and we’re just now in the process of selling her home, and we haven’t yet put her to rest her urn is still sitting in her home, I feel like I’m grieving all over again. Plus we just lost my brother in-law in April and just had his celebration of life a few weeks back it’s been very hard. It does feel like trauma, and more trauma, with my other brother in-law a few years ago, it’s been one death after another. It’s very overwhelming. My legs tighten up. My grief brain is real.

[@dianelindenberger6941]

two and a half years since Mom died and I am so depressed and anxious.....had to hire a lady to stay with me and going broke trying to pay her but I don't want to be alone......

[@kaykrause4469]

Wow, 6 yrs ago I lost my mom. Not just my mom, she lived with me for over 25 yrs. She was my best friend, my teacher, my mentor, my prayer partner and when she died the whole world changed. By then I was retired and we had moved back to our home state. She had had some strokes and was changing in personality a bit. But we still had fun. I would take for drives in the country which she loved and always brought our dog. That first year after she died, I thought I was living in solitary confinement. Not a soul to talk to. I didn’t have many friends and the house was so silent I thought I would loose my mind. After a year my sister and her husband came up to live with me. My little sister. The first few months we had fun then she was struck with horrible sciatic pain and was in bed for months. Then they found out she had cervical cancer. She was a real trooper, she never complained, even though the pain was horrible. I lost my dog and then several months after that I lost my sister. My brother in law was supposed to keep living there, my sister wanted me to make sure he always had a home. I assured her he would. A month after she was gone he told me the day before he was leaving in the morning. My family is everything to me other than my faith, and in a short span I lost them. I have one sister who doesn’t live close by. She doesn’t grieve hard. She didn’t understand why I felt the way I did. There is no grief group in the area I’m in. Now I understand that I just tried to push through. I watched my sister die and my mom. Still my brain tried to tell me they were somewhere else. I still don’t remember like I used to and now I know why. Thank you.

[@patriciarider40]

I lost my husband to a Fentanyl od,I found him. This happened 12/08/21, I’m having such a hard time moving on. I definitely have grief brain. I forget everything!! Thank you for your videos on grief, they are so helpful!

[@jeaninerumble6503]

Your generosity in providing this guidance to everyone is such a vital service. Having lost 3 uncles, 1 aunt, my two younger brothers and a close friend in the past three years, my brain and heart are struggling for equilibrium. (I am seeing a counselor and navigating through each day as best I can). Your messages are particularly meaningful and reassuring. ❤Blessings to you for the New Year.

[@adasimonetti2232]

You are a true champion for surviving all of this. Athough in your heart you find yourself isolated be assured that God knows your pain and emptiness. He is at your side. Read and contemplate on the readings 📚 you adhere to. In your religious readings you will find that if you take the time to contemplate he will provide you with that inner strength. You aren't alone. I sympathize..many have gone though it before so it becomes a lost memory, however those that have been through have advanced one more level in God's understanding of his master plan. May your siblings and relatives all rest in peace and the best you can do is pray 🙏 for their heavenly journey and go on with living. Don't despair, many good people out there. God give you 💪 strength. I recently lost my mother and it takes time and keeping busy and yes once in a while interacting with others although you may not feel like it. Other people may just need to know their lives are not as bad when you release your feelings. Thank you for sharing your feelings. May God give you strength and healthy thoughts.

[@jennebeattie3168]

Have watched this video several times. It never gets old. 18 months and I'm still DEEP in brain fog. I lost my 14 year old son. He would have been turning 16 on THIS COMING MONDAY - 9/11 😢

[@Bia-starlight]

I lost my dad to cancer a month ago. He was 49, and I'm 23. I postponed finding a career to take care of him. Everyday is so hard. Everything seems like a distraction and I miss him so much. I lie in bed most of the time, pondering about death. Its definitely hard to live without him when we were very very close.

[@raquelmccreary8473]

Sorry for your loss 🥹My husband got his wings 7/29/23 and I have 2 boys in there 20’s as well I will be praying for your strength in this difficult time ❤️🙏🏾

[@catlady3147]

What an awesome therapist you must be. I lost my beloved cat, Willie, who was 14, 8 weeks ago. It was a 4 day window on him suddenly declining and trying to save his life. Within 4 days, I had to put him to sleep. That in itself was extremely traumatic bc I wasn't expecting his death. I stil can't find my garage keys. I have no clue where they are. I know they'll show up. As I come out of this initial and extreme grief, I'm still processing this loss but at least feeling a little more mental clarity.

[@Jo-im6iz]

Thank you Jo. Yes I can identify with all that you say. It is so helpful to have your posts. Love to all🙏

[@cindypatterson9441]

Thank you so much for your videos! I have learned so much from them. My father passed away less than a month ago and I had no idea all the things grief does to a person. I am learning everyday to have more patience with myself. I feel like I am just starting to come out of the "brain fog." It is embarrassing when you can't think of the word you want to say or have to ask multiple times for the same information from someone. I get so irritated with myself, because it is so unlike me.

[@Apollo_Blaze]

This video about this topic has been one of the most important ones to me of all the ones you have made. This one has helped me so much because it is something I did not know and now that I do know this I understand what is happening to me. I wish that this was widespread knowledge because it would help so many people. I can only hope that others will share it and that it will become common knowledge. Thank you.

[@erilindigmaya2707]

Almost two years and I'm still grieving. These videos are so helpful ♡ thank you

[@missnursie9925]

I had a bad day today. I tried all the breathing and mindfulness practices I could think of. I just couldn’t shake it but I did get through my work day and now I’m home where I can cry. Thank you for your video. It helps remind me that it’s just a bad day. I don’t have to stay broken. Hopefully tomorrow will be better

[@rachelm4213]

YES! Yes yes! Thank you for this !!

[@chrismottram-wooster3142]

Wow, I can relate to all that you mentioned. My first way of coping was to see myself as being 18 again, with a life's experiences but no idea what I want to be when I grow up. At 18 I knew I was not in control as I had little experience of the world and so how could I expect to be able to deal with stuff without the help of parents or friends. Well no parents now and 3 younger brothers who really never grew up, but I have found that I do have many friends who have a wonderful way of helping me and gently steering me through the bad days. I shall be returning, it helps to hear it in spoken words. Thank you.

[@maryannehaffner3294]

Thank you, Jo. Yes, I experienced many of these. Your explanation of our brains on grief helped me realize that I am normal and finding my way. Peace and hugs.

[@rosefenton3005]

In my case, it was losing my darling husband/carer 7 months ago. Just in shock because I believed the Lord was healing him gradually. He seemed to be doing so well gradually and was managing to do little exercises and even getting with help to the bathroom. Then suddenly he was being sick again and went downhill fast. I was numb and just in shock and don’t know how I got through at all at first. I am disabled and I’ll myself and need help from carers and was in hospital in March this year. It is the worst grief pain I’ve ever known. My only consolation is that I know he is with the Lord and he is free from pain and that I will see him again when I die. All in God’s sovereign will

[@reginabyers5378]

My husband of 29 years went home to be with The Lord two months ago and am going through all of this.

[@bradpochop]

I know about brain fog! 9 months ago, my partner & soul-mate of 27 years died suddenly of heart failure. 3 weeks later, I was driving to a doctor's appointment. I had been to this clinic numerous times, but could not find it. I spent 30 + minutes going back & forth, looking for it, sure that it was located north of ___________Road. I finally found the correct street by accident, 2 blocks south of _____________Road.( I should probably have not been behind the wheel of a car.) I have recently discovered your videos , Jo. Finding them very helpful. Wish I had known about them sooner!

[@albertrodriguez4190]

I was find until today. Lost is lonely.

[@patknox4558]

Thank you so much for validating what I'm going through. I have definitely felt like I'm losing my mind on some days. One of the biggest, most terrifying parts for me was realizing that for many people reaching the second year of grief I only adds, not improves your suffering. Because the path out of this is by no means straight, but a winding, twisted, convoluted, meandering one that has you traveling backwards two-thirds of the time with no discernable improvement at all, although time has passed. As far as brain fog, besides forgetting. Whole conversations and encounters with people that I'd have to have again, what I hated most was talking to someone perfectly safely and then suddenly just blacking out - forgetting what I was talking about. As if the lights just suddenly went out. Terrifying.

[@joycefoster684]

It's been a little over 2 years for me. Everyone wants me to be ok. I pretend alot for them, but my brain fog is quite evident. Will it ever go away??? I also don't shed many tears anymore for anything. I think I used them all up. Is this a thing too?

[@susettesantiago5509]

Omg……when I was nineteen I was assaulted by a man and was hit in the forehead with a brick……now I have frontal lobe syndrome…….then I lost my two brothers ti disease then my friend of 16 years passed away then my father……I am a basket case……I have days when I wish I hadn’t woken up……it’s terrifying……you described exactly how I feel…….

[@cupofjotunheim1226]

I lost my father and our cat in the same year, I have carried that grief and loss for the past 2-3 years. I have epilepsy and I recently was trying to just 'get over it's because of things that my husband said back then and feeling my health condition worsen. I never realized that this is where it all stemmed from. I keep trying to make things right, but I'm only 32 and I have a lot of life to live. Thank you.

[@Neon_Bombshell]

I just lost my brother. I have grief brain fog. I forgot about a work meeting I had this morning. I have been experiencing a stress rash all over my body, nausea, and a headache. It has been very hard.

[@Laurie_Tinsley]

Hubby passed away a little over 3 months ago and I feel like I will never get over the loss. I miss him so much. I wake up with grief brain and go to bed with grief brain.

[@adasimonetti2232]

Thank you for your comments.they are very helpful. Grief is real and to think that there are many going through it alone and do not know how to survive it. The most important to to go and live on and share and interact. Thank you.

[@n.weavers9068]

Lost my beloved Husband and my Father within 2 weeks of each other. It has been very hard. My husband and I have a business that is small but worldwide. Everything that you said is true. I have had to super concentrate for work or when driving. I feel that I must be hyper vigilant to make sure that I stay safe. I am tired and depressed. I am sore and I feel lost. this is no good.

[@jennifershort3104]

Almost 15 months in my grief for my mom I still have brain fog on my worst days.

[@sagedandy123]

I've felt like this my whole life.

[@cecpartygurl]

I'm a large woman. So I have depression with that. Then I lost my blind brother that I took care of for my whole life he was my life. I'm dead inside. I'm only here cause I have to be. At least for now.

[@yokimawhittaker5193]

Yes I forget to pay my bills and I would almost put something in the freezer that belongs in the food pantry. I forget the direction that I need to go on the freeway. I have to end up exiting and making a U-turn to go the direction to get me to my destination.

[@marilynb8136]

My husband died 3 months ago of endstage renal failure. I was grieving years before he died. I had to sell our home a d move. Had to clean out his clothes as well as moving my personal stuff. Some days my brain is unable to focus. Dealing with banks. Utility companies, mortuary etc has been hell!!! And it's Xmas. The holidays are horrendous for anyone who is grieving!!! I just want to go to sleep and never wake up.

[@doihavetohaveachannel8289]

OMG you have just described me. It has been 2 month since my husband of 42 years passed away.

[@sunking2001]

As I grieve for the first time since 2006...your videos bring me comfort and understanding. Wow...grief is such a powerful force that we need help with. Thank you for your calming and educational videos. You are helping me and thousands of others.

[@rupertandfriends7424]

I’ve heard of this and decided to look to see if I can find more information. I literally feel like I’m losing my mind. My husband recently died a little over a year ago from a sudden illness , he was my soul mate. I have always been on the ball, now I can’t remember anything, get weird pains , cry easily and wonder if I will ever feel normal again. Nobody gets it and I feel like a burden. I just want to be productive again and be able to take care of myself and not drive my kids nuts.

[@npenick66]

I unexpectedly lost my wife of 20 years four weeks ago last night. The grief and pain are real. The brain fog is down right annoying. I couldn't even remember her social security number when I was at the mortuary, had to go home and get it. My thoughts, reasoning and memory are all higgly piggly now. I usually have a pretty good memory. I usually remember passport numbers, bank account numbers, drivers license numbers, all important dates, etc. Now I have to make a list for the grocery store and even then I miss a few items. It used to feel like my brain was a muscle car, now it feels like a '73 Pinto with a flat tire. This darn grief phase better hurry up and process, I can't afford to be Forrest Gumping my way through life right now.

[@williamclymer1602]

My wife of 53 years passed in February of 2022, I’ve been frozen in time can’t get anything done. No motivation at all . Im also 100 % PTSD from Vietnam. Don’t know what to do next.

[@paulinepaterson5918]

William, how are you now, 10 months on? 🐻🐻🐻🐻 Hope a bear hug or two may help

[@joelburdsall9308]

Thank you for all of this information. I felt weak and feel weak now after my wife passed away in March. As a man in this modern world, and a vet, crying and weakness is not something we do. But I do feel sad and heartbroken and cry almost daily. It very much does feel like brain fog and so far uncontrollable and painful. I realize I need counseling.

[@Apollo_Blaze]

I cry every day too Joel...and so do many other guys for sure...it needs to be something we do..we are human and we hurt..I hope you have spoken to someone since you mentioned that in your post. Big hug.

[@marshabowlin1757]

Lost my husband January 2022 I cry everyday and nights are so lonely we were married 51 years he went unexpectedly and I just can’t get over it I miss him so much I only pray it will get better for all of us 😢

[@Apollo_Blaze]

@@marshabowlin1757 ❤❤❤

[@maureenrees636]

I understand, I feel like that too.I’m lucky with my family coming together to help me and my niece is a counsellor and was with me a great deal of the time in the year after losing my beloved husband and explained what what was happening to me.. I we were together for 57 years. I think I’m improving on the everyday things, but still cry everyday. And much more. All we can do is keep trying. God bless you .

[@MrMatrx22]

Damn didn't know this was a thing! Everything you are saying is true. Ive been to the doctor and had tests run just to find this out after 10 yrs of going through this. Wow this is deep

[@TruthOrDare1013]

Since 2008, I have lost over 50 members of my family. This includes my MIL in 2010, FIL in 2012, my husband in 2015, and both of my parents within 56 hours of each other in 2017. Effectively losing both sets of parents plus my husband within 6-1/2 yrs. brought me to my knees. We lost our baby sister in 2020, sister-in-law in 2021 and most recently a brother this year. I'm looking at an average of over 3 people per year. How much more can a brain take? The fog has never lifted. I don't k ow who i am anymore. 😢

[@raquelmccreary8473]

🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@shanejohnson606]

Daily brain fog has started nearly 8yrs after suddenly losing my brother. This video really reassures this is normal and I definitely am experiencing delayed grief. Thank you

[@jenkohms7043]

I came home after spending 9 months fighting cancer w/ the ❤ of my life & started calling my cat by the name a cat that was around when I met my late ❤ 15 years before. I had nightmares for 2 months until I figured out I was riddled w/ guilt from “magical thinking” that he’d get better, & felt I prolonged his suffering. Not true, & I knew it but... I literally spent a night weeping & begging his forgiveness & the nightmares went away. Gone. I have ADHD but my brain fog was OTHERWORLDLY. Drawing blanks at simple questions & more, at times it still is. I see it getting better & I’m finding a new norm, after a year and a half but it’s still there & I think I’ll never be the same. I never understood the meaning of a part of me died with him, until now.

[@WrenChastain]

Coming up March 13 one year and all those emotions are coming back 😢

[@sandrakozlowski3405]

Feeling lightheaded

[@jennifersetser9091]

My 47 yr old son died about two months ago…we are raising his 16 yr old son,have been since he was born,as both parents were too mentally I’ll to care for him. I’m trying to get back to “normal” ,at least to keep up with household stuff,but some days,I just stay in my chair. My husband wants to go go go…it’s his way of coping,but I just feel numb. For his sake,we met friends for lunch…I tried to be sociable,but neither of them ever mentioned our son,and instead, talked constantly about their kids,grandkids,with photos,ect. It certainly didn’t help..just left me feeling that our son’ s life wasn’t worth mentioning…I cried all the way home. I know many people don’t know how to deal with grief,but we have been friends for many years..and I just couldn’t understand how they could be so insensitive. Am I being too sensitive? I’m trying but so e days I just can’t keep from crying.

[@ewalichorowicz4614]

This is such an accurate explanation of what happens to us when we grieve ❤ very helpful video. Thank you so much Jo!

[@phyllisjackson4322]

Having experienced multiple losses over a relatively short time ,including long drawn out dying process of cancer, parkinson's, Alzheimer's, liver disease, and animal pets diseases I found a psychologist who listened and gave me tools to honor my grief and to find joy in daily living. Compassion is the password.

[@defaultname7685]

I thought my memory was getting better around a year after my sibling died but for some reason it’s gotten so much worse around month 18. Has this happened to anyone else?

[@chrismccullough8539]

Hi Jo, great information. Thanku. I normally have a strong flight or freeze response, not so much the fight though. I'm finding I only want to be around people that I feel safe with, so that limits my support group. Tone of voice and gentleness of spirit are important in a friend. Thanku once again.❤

[@debbie678]

Feeling much better and less critical of myself now. I was a caregiver for my 93 father. Just trying to get thru the holidays. Thank you 😊

[@l.u.5862]

My Dad died December 2022. And was his caretaker all 2022. I've been trying to cope with it and staying strong, but just this month I had a melt down. Spoke with my doctor and she prescribed me with antidepressants I took it for 3 days and stopped cold turkey. It made me feel worse. I am now going on week two being off from work. Needed a mental break. I have a therapist I will meeting with every Fridays. I appreciate you and your videos. Thank you from the bottom of my heart♥️ Also, regarding the brain fog - thank you for clarifying.

[@skellener]

All of the above. That’s how it feels. Now over a year and a half since I lost Leesa. I feel broken. i can’t remember things. I feel out of place. I’m so lost. I wish all the pain would stop. 😢

[@megmaryatt8883]

A couple of things you say in this video touch home about grief brain fog. (I know brain fog from a stroke I had about 5 years ago). My husband passed 94 days ago (yes I am counting the days, and writing in my journal every day, which helps immensely). I have a very hard time concentrating and focusing. While driving in my neighborhood, I have run a red light while talking to my brother, and had a little bit of difficulty in a traffic circle.soon after the death. I have to say out loud to myself "Be present". Otherwise my mind takes me far away from my task at hand. I will only drive locally until I feel like this isn't an issue any more. I have also been very forgetful, but am getting better on that front. A second thing is that I don't want to be touched or be sexual in any way. I suppose this isn't surprising because I had such a wonderful relationship with my husband. At this point, I don't know if I will ever allow a man to touch me intimately again, but I guess that could change over time. But one of the hardest things is not being able to focus and not feeling like 'doing' anything, even though I am still so busy taking care of business such as transferring bank accounts into a Trust, working out medical bills, transferring IRA funds, sending death certificates (still), and wrapping my head around the fact that I have to do everything by myself moving forward. I'll be glad when I am more clearheaded, and able to comfortably do simple tasks while I am present doing so.

[@vanessamoore2642]

So true.

[@wendycopeland5147]

This explains so much❤

[@reginabyers5378]

Thank you for these videos.

[@charlotteameliamurray220]

i relate to this i lost my son.

[@judithwallace2091]

Another excellent video. Thank you!

[@idahospudgirlidahospudgirl4998]

This I can relate to SO MUCH

[@pattybristol4643]

Thank you so much for your videos. I just discovered them. ❤

[@ByCoreyLaury]

Thank you so much

[@dtr1286]

Thank you

[@user-qz2zy5vz8w]

Thank you so much!

[@trishpurden7131]

Hi, I have experienced loosing my keys for my car, can’t remember things, have to write things down to ensure I don’t forget things. Leaving pots on and forgetting them….so have to ensure I switch them off when leaving the stove. Then when I remember, can put them back on.

[@shibillionaira4710]

All of this !

[@achavie100]

Bingo!!!!! This is a game changer for me-thank you for posting this video. I’ve been dealing with “grief brain” since my Father’s death in 2019. It is reassuring to learn some of the “why” behind all that has happened in my world since he left this life.

[@larkspur4726]

Thank you for posting this wonderful, spot on, video.

[@grieftherapist]

You're very welcome

[@margaretgalvin4667]

How long does "grief brain fog" last? My 3rd brother died in 2004 (suicide), & i still have this grief brain fog. My oldest brother died at age 13(drowning accident)....i was 9 at the time....i know my body & mind have never gotten over his death.....at 9....i thought only elderly people died...i was close to my brother...my body went into shock....changed me altogether....no concentration at school....didn't grow, didn't put on weight....stayed 4ft for a long time....i can't string a full sentence together when talking now....can't think of words. My 2nd brother died when i was 17...(vehicle accident)....which was a shock too.... grief brain fog is a relief to hear about....thought i was going mad...thank you....

[@jodiegall3366]

All the above

[@Tiggerinas]

Other than being caught by a speed camera immediately after my partner's final get-together of family and friends, I haven't noticed after 2 1/2 weeks since she's been gone, any semblance of brain fog as you describe it. As for finding normality again, as I see it there cannot be normality because our lives will never be the same again. The greatest challenge is accepting that she is now in that vast category of people who no longer exist. All that wisdom, humour, quick-wittedness has vanished - where's it all gone!

[@engincigerciogullari]

İt has been 4 or five years since my mom's death (i dont count) i barely renember anything about the first year. İ have difficulty finding words even in my mother tongue. Not so frequent but it happens. İ thought it was because of covid or senecence as i am 47 but it may be related to grief i donno because it is not over yet maybe wont be over. Thank you

[@vanessamoore2642]

How long will this go on. I feel like this now for a year

[@margaretward7682]

I have experienced not sleeping well, and some depression and brain fog since my mother passed over 3 years ago.

[@emmalea1371]

I i love you ❤

[@lindahobbs2136]

Jo - Could you address how caregiving for a loved one with chronic illness or degenertive disease and Grieving Brain work? Prolonged grieving, ambiguous loss, anticipatory grief...I've experienced the Grief Brain Fog but wondered if it's that or....if I'm on the brink of dementia. 😢