How I Came Out as Trans at 13

[@echoliegh4924]

"We thought you were either gay or this"

[@dannerskillen1971]

MOOD

[@rai1133]

Sorry mom IM BOTH

[@max-xq2mx]

that's what my teacher said!

[@danielstrike7590]

I’m 14, closeted and really scared. I know my parents won’t be supportive but I also feel like I have to start T soon. I wish I was a cis male

[@echoliegh4924]

Daniel Strike I know how you feel. I'm just a year younger and I just came out today, and my mom said that I'm just confused. And my dad seems just a little mad

[@danielstrike7590]

So sorry to hear that. It sucks that not everyone are accepting. I came out to my parents but they don’t really support me and don’t understand

[@dan5721]

Daniel Strike hope you are ok! I’m coming out on Friday (ftm) and I’m scared too, but it’s totally natural! Don’t forget you are valid, and it’s better to live your authentic life than live a lie, and there are lots of people that will support you, both online and in real life!

[@kullinai]

My mom said she's supportive but calls me her sweet little girl. I know I'm closeted but God, it still hurts. Why can't she just say something neutral for once?

[@heisenberg6103]

How’s everything going now

[@rai1133]

I’m crying right now. I want to tell my dad about these things and about pronouns and gender and stuff but he has so much on his hands. Dealing with a teenager as a single dad working a job day and night and only home at 3am and 6pm is hard enough. I’m so scared for him. Im not even worried if he doesn’t accept me because I know he probably will. But I’m so worried about him

[@heisenberg6103]

How’s everything going now

[@riduls9137]

Update?

[@Alienstich345]

update?

[@shylilkid5767]

"Well, we thought you were either gay or this, we were just waiting on you to tell us" 😂😂 ooof why is this me

[@-scopiophobia-6769]

I’m 13, I’ve decided that today is the day I’m going to come out. Maybe I can start of the new year with finally coming out and maybe being accepted by my family

[@blactearsf5538]

How did it go

[@usernameisusernam]

Update???

[@rileyy_a]

so...

[@savedchannelforlater]

Update?

[@AshersHubby]

How did it go my bro?

[@hayden715]

Boy! You're so lucky! My mom says that if you're under 16-18, it is most likely a phase.

[@Finn-hq8wd]

How are you?

[@hayden715]

@@Finn-hq8wd I'm good! My mom still doesn't support me, but I've got my first gender therapy appointment next month! I might be on T by the time I'm 19 (if I'm lucky)

[@NagasakiSoyo]

@@hayden715 how’d it go?

[@PoisonIvory088]

Same or atleast i think

[@usernameisusernam]

Yeah, while watching a show, my mom said that if she had a kid who was trans (surprise surprise, im trans) she would be weary about letting them transition

[@trafficcat]

I came out to my mom last night. I’m 13 and I feel less alone.

[@leok.6343]

im coming out today and im 13

[@p1xelware]

@@leok.6343 did it go fine? :0

[@p1xelware]

how did it go?

[@dinopines9191]

@@leok.6343 how did it go , I’m also 13 and I wanna come out before I turn 14

[@user-dn1nq7if8b]

@@dinopines9191 same, im so so so anxious, I don’t want them to tell me it’s a phase it’s been about a year and a half for me :/

[@gryffon_x8253]

I'm 15 and absolutely terrified to come out to my family, most of them have, in the past, expressed negative opinions towards transgender folks but I don't know how long I can keep hiding this significant part of myself. I know I'm not going to come out by actually speaking to them - I'll either freeze up and run away or break out into tears and run away - so I've decided that I'm going to go with writing letters/sending messages to everyone, I'm just waiting until I feel comfortable enough to do so, which I hope is soon. I hate having to live like this.

[@-river-water-3838]

I'm 12 and going to come out as a trans boy soon. I think I'm going to tonight, but my mom is a little sick and I don't want to stress her out too much. Edit: This is a little late, but she basically said I was confused. She said I could transition when I am 18 "if" I still feel like a boy.

[@yasussy]

How are things going?

[@ScoutTF2reaI]

I think you should be able to transition whenever. It's YOUR body, and YOUR mind. You should be able to do as you please with it! If you want to be trans, be trans. But, if you do decide to wait, I completely respect that. It's up to you what you do and don't do.

[@Jenny-nz8fb]

@alacarp - definitely a 12 year old should be able to do whatever they want, it’s their body - they should be able to get a tattoo, drink alcohol and decide on whether to be sterilised and lose sexual function forever. I actually think you should be able to make these decisions when you are much younger because it will always be your body and yours alone and nobody should be allowed to tell you what to do with your body.

[@helenalovelock1030]

@@Jenny-nz8fbso if your 12 year old told you they wanted to take drugs that could affect their life FOREVER you would just say yeah cool go for it?

[@patopatric]

you really dont know anything about what ur talking about, right? its NEVER like that, it takes YEARS for people to come out, they are scared as fuck when they tell their parents, plus, its not necessarily permanent, for example puberty blokers are NOT permanent, and the same goes for just a haircut, different clothes, etc, transition doesnt necessarily means "drugs" PLUS just 1% of people who transitioned ACTUALLY regret their choices, so yea (oh, and 20% of that 1% do it for social pressure IMAGINE, that would make only -0.80%- of ACTUAL regrets@@helenalovelock1030

[@Nameless-dw5nv]

Whoa I'm the first like. I came out when I was 13 too but that was in 2014. I'm mtf. Your family sounds sweet. My family accepted right away except my dad but I don't have much contact with him so I'm fine. :P

[@sneed2600]

yo you came out mtf at 13?? tips plsssss girl i am dying i cannot come up with a way to come out

[@blaue_blue]

You have a really good family system, support system. I couldn't imagine being in a family where this kind of communication and support happens? Couldn't imagine having so many friends that you'd go door to door. Or all the support. Completely foreign world for me. You are incredibly lucky. Or just working in a collective unit in this way? I didn't know people actually did that. I didn't come out until I was 20 because no good family, no friends, no support. My mom took it bad but after a while, we're good now. 26 and doing ok. Never really came out to anyone, just kind of deactivated my Facebook and live kind of quietly.

[@shoppingcarts2084]

did i mention ily?? like all ur vids are so helpful

[@laurieyingling3150]

This is great Connor! Hopefully it will give courage to many young people who are trying to get their message out. Hugs always!

[@potatomilk1234]

I tried coming out around 5th grade. Everyone kept telling me it was a phase and everything. That it would go away. Well. 4 years later on ninth grade.... I’m still trans. Either this is a long ass phase or I’m trans. Also people on discord are always like “show me your face” and then they say “oh you’re just a tomboy” yeah.. that is what I believe most of my life. But I’ve come to acceptance even if others haven’t. Also I’m watching this so I can come out to my class as trans. My first thought was to just ask my friends to spread gossip and rumors or start calling me by my preferred name in public. Especially during school

[@krispykw3me]

omfg I feel the same way. I'm in 6th grade and have talked to my mom about feeling trans but since I came out as gay, she said j was probably more of a fem gay. I feel you, and hope someone can support you.

[@ellie__3635]

I’m only 11, I’ve only told my friends about me being trans. I’m really scared to tell my stepdad because I told him that one of my friends are trans at 12, he said that my friend was too young. I’m pretty sure that parts of my family are supportive so I may come out to them first…

[@sharkygames1473]

im planing to come out this October by leaving a letter for my mom and siblings to read while im away on a 4 day DC for school. Im gonna send a playlist of videos as well so they can watch them and learn where im coming from, but watching your videos help a lot with the stress and everything that comes along with coming out. awesome vid, keep it up!

[@joycondrift]

Im 13, and a currently closeted trans girl i think Perfect time to come out!

[@jank9289]

i came out when i was (newly) 12. I just texted my mum a really badly written text to her during my lunch time at school (which i spent 3 weeks writing). My mum promptly told my nuclear family and then my extended family. All extremely accepting (to an extent), but i wished i did it better. I also came out to my school via a facebook status. Tbh though i was 12, i would of definitely done it differently now

[@StarryPuppeteer]

I plan to come out tomorrow by sending a message to my mom, i know the worst i will get might be a "you're too young" which i have got before so its just a matter if trying again, I'll update this comment when ive sent it It went quite well, i texted my mom and we had a chat, she said after christmas I can get counselling to help me figure myself out (not that she was- discouraging me but more that because i am young to help me figure shit out, and theres this youth group near me for LGBTQ+ people aged 11-24 so she's asking about that as well

[@e.scottt09]

I’m so disappointed with myself, 2 years ago I was in year six and I new I was trans. I had a plan to come out so I could enter secondary as a male called tom I told my closest friends they were all like ok cool. I was to scared to call my parents as one of my less close friends said “it’s a phase.” They put me down so low I couldn’t tell my parents, here I am now nobody knows I am trans other than one person. All my friend I grew up with in primary have moved up with me to secondary think it was a phase. I’m at the point we’re I need to tell someone but I can’t I’m scared it’s a phase I scared of there reactions and it’s tearing me apart. I’m putting this out to get help. I am such a lucky person in the facts that as somebody born female I have a deep voice and I am forever greatful. Please really with any tips for coming out or how to safely bind and appear more masculine. And if you have taken the time to read this, thank you and please don’t hate on me.

[@Marie-jr6np]

i just came out yesterday only to my friends they were so supportive and it turns out another one of my friends was trans so im not alone now i havnt came out to my parents yet my name is gonna be pheonix :)

[@astrandedhushpuppie128]

AHHHHHHH IM SO AWKWARD AROUND MY MOM WITH THIS KIND OF STUFF!!! I'VE COME OUT TO MY FRIENDS AND SISTER BUT NO ONE ELSEEEE!!!!!!

[@sgtsurgeon.]

I'm 12 and I'm frankly pretty scared to come out, but I'm just going to explode if I can't socially transition soon and I need to tell someone. I can't tell my brother because then my parents might think I'm tryna brainwash him or something, so I'm just gonna tell everybody at once. I was outed when I was younger and it didn't go so well, but maybe it'll go better this time since I'm older. I don't know. I'm just gonna do it. I'll update when I do, and I'll tell you guys how it went. Planning on saying something later tonight, but I might chicken out (again) so idk.

[@LK-my3wq]

How are you doing now?

[@dayshatroutman8583]

I’m 13 I’m pretty sure my parents will be supportive I don’t really know but I was thinking about coming out in a few days but I just can’t gain the confidence to

[@saucepacket7173]

Im also 13 but my mother is very religious so I doubt she will accept me but YOLO. Imma tell her on my birthday 😀

[@heisenberg6103]

How’s everything going now

[@ZanderFoster]

the audio/visual effects towards the end were real distracting and i'm not sure what purpose they were meant to serve but I appreciate the story bro- keep it up!

[@ConnorOKeefe]

Good to know! Thanks for the feedback! I'm playing around with different looks to try and kind of create a unique style, but they should never distract from the focus of the video. Guess that means I should probably tone it down a bit :D

[@ZanderFoster]

Keep it up bro! Love your content

[@deadnebula]

I’m 13, I just told my mother that I want to start Hormone Blockers. She at first was thinking that it was just “being a girl” and that stuff. I explained that it wasn’t and it was something more. She said that she just wants me to be happy and that we’ll look into it. I’m still worried though and I don’t know why.

[@kansasdias7322]

i am 14 and a closeted ftm i plan to come out to my family next summer i’m not sure how to come out i’ve been searching and watching lots of videos i do know for sure i’ve talked to my school counselor any advice on how to bring it up and come out?

[@tancoplays3502]

From my experience it's like a bandage just ripp it off really fast and tell them as soon as possible if they don't understand send them an article or something that might help them to understand

[@ratskullz_x]

I always feel so much more confident and 'like my true self' when I look more masculine I can literally spend ages just trying to put my hair up to look like a boys then put a hoodie on or a jacket on to hide the rest of my long hair I feel like I am not even in my own body half of the time but like I said I am not really feeling anything I feel numb, for example I literally never cry no matter how hard I try the most I get is a few tears I can watch like something for a whole year and shed a single tear hardly ever when they die even if they are my favourite character. I keep asking my mum if she can take me shopping so I can buy hoodies and stuff but she's to busy sleeping. Makes me a bit uncomfortable saying this but I am like almost a double D in bra size so it's really hard to hide my chests I always wear sports bras cause they keep my chest more secure and a bit more flat but idk. (Like I said I turned 13 end of august) and it's so uncomfortable so I always try to wear oversized clothes but my mum has got me all shirts that show of almost the top of my chest which I really dislike I have tried to be like my friend and dress up more girly but I just don't feel comfortable I'd prefer to stay in hoodies and stuff. half the time I am not thinking and I literally try hide my chest like it's the end of the world if someone realises I have one. (which they already do cause they know I am a "girl". :/ I am so sick of how I feel and how pathetic I am being right now saying all this to people who literally don't care.

[@ptarmiganphantom]

Man.. wish I was brave enough to come out

[@Turtle77_0]

I don't know how to do it I'm having a panic attack just thinking about it. Note I belive I am male to female.

[@Doritofleshlit]

This helped me a ton. Thank you. Im coming out in about 5 minutes

[@snowy_lillop]

I texted my sister who I thought I could trust that I was trans and so she told my mom even though I told her not to so I get jealous of people who are able to come out to their parents at a chosen time

[@ma_k0shroom]

I AM 11 I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

[@samfox1404]

Can I copy your letter please just for my parents as I can’t think of what to say please well some of it

[@whyamiherelol750]

Wow I'm 13 and I'm the closet. I'm ftm. I'm terrified to tell my dad but I am very confident that I'm a dude. So I think I will come out soon. I'm so scared and happy that it will be over.

[@yellowfanglover2257]

I'm thinking of coming out, I now my mom and probably dad will support me, but my grandparents are super transphbic and homeaphbic. They stopped buying hints ketchup because they had a supporting clerical

[@sleepy_ember]

i'm coming out later today at 21 lol. hope my mom doesn't kick me out..

[@remyapollo3890]

I wish you the best of luck

[@tylerwf8278]

I need help i came out to my parents and they my dad disapproves and my mom plays and says "oh shor u are" im 13 all most 14 and im starting to feel like my family thinks im lying but I did get my mom to choose from three names Justin Tyler and Josh she chose Tyler but she never called me yet nor does she use my pronouns he him I really need your advice

[@kullinai]

Josh and Tyler.. coincidence? I think not Anyway I know I'm not him but I think you should straight up tell her. Just confront her and say "Hey, use my real name and pronouns.". You could go into the science of it, which I recommend. Unless your parents are over it by now, I hope this makes you feel better.

[@tancoplays3502]

I would recommend sending them an article or something about symptoms and how it makes people suffering from it feel that helped my mom to more easily understand me

[@justdamienhere1325]

Did you send the message to your parents? Or did you come out in person, I don’t think I quite got that and I just wanted to know if it’d be bad to come out to my parents like that. I’m ftm transgender, 14 years old. This video is really inspiring and thank you for making it.

[@ConnorOKeefe]

I came out to my dad in person, who called my mom (with my consent) in the next couple days while she was out of town and we chatted about it when she came back. But I also know folks who have come out to their parents via letter, text message, phone call, etc. You know your family dynamic best, I'd say trust your gut with the best way for you to come out. Just keep safety as a top priority :)

[@phireeagle5530]

I am currently living as a girl but I don't feel comfortable as a girl. I used a different e-mail and set up a male Facebook profile and sent friend requests to some of my friends. I have a church family and they are very forgiving however they are also very religious. I don't know what to do since the strain of me acting as a girl is weighing me down. It's literally killing me and the only thing I can think of is to stop going to church until I am mostly transitioned but that would also mean me cutting off ties to a lot of people who have helped me. I have no clue what to do. If you have any advice I would be open to it.

[@Maddog-jr7rw]

What should I do if my parents are tranphobic?

[@tancoplays3502]

If you have a sibling who you trust tell them first they will really help my sister helped me very much to build up courage I thought my parents would be transphobic but they were very kind and excepting

[@k333-33k]

Im seriously debating if i should tell my friend. I moved to a new school and successfully passed as a male but people use he/him around the friend. He keeps correcting them that its She/her. He likes men and i told him i was gay so hes even more confused. I even told his other friends i was female..im kinda scared because he might think im weird or might not forget to use my pronouns- im fighting myself whether to tell him tomorrow..I’ll update-

[@foolishkidd7020]

I just wanted to say that your an inspiration, I'm 12 years old and I'm turning 13, and I plan on coming out as transgender, to my family. Could you please give me tips😥😣😍

[@oliversdrawings4896]

I'm 12, 13 this month. I wrote a letter for my mum, but she basically laughed and was like we kinda expected this. She said shed be accepting but it actually took me 3 weeks to explain why I wanted her to call me by a different name and she still doesn't but the rest of my family call me by my preferred name. What I'm trying to say I wouldn't worry about to much unless your nervous that you will get injured or get kicked out.

[@saucepacket7173]

@@oliversdrawings4896 For me Im so scared my mother will hurt me, but people call it “discipline”

[@tancoplays3502]

I have no idea how I managed to do it I but I came out to my mom a week after I realized I was transgender obviously from my profile picture here I'm not transitioned yet but I will hopefully be able to see a psychiatrist about this later when all of this Corona stuff is over

[@babybatvomit]

I’m gonna do a family therapy meeting and try coming out to my mum and dad.. I’ll update y’all when it happens

[@babybatvomit]

@moka dad disowned me. I don’t talk to him anymore, but mum accepted me.

[@contaquenaousomais6197]

*I am 14 old. and am a male trans, i am planning to come out to my parents next month; I'm sure they won't support me, cause my parents are VERY religious.* *I really want to tell them before, but I am afraid...*

[@the_queer_forest_fairy5170]

Im going to come out as trangender nonbianary to my family on my 13th birthday (11 months from now) im really nervous but im excited (at that point ill be out to my freinds)

[@contaquenaousomais6197]

oh, there are only 6 months left. I hope everything works out. good luck.

[@saucepacket7173]

Your mom is the best.

[@red_locarno]

Are you from Ireland ? Or your parents ? Clocked the Irish surname

[@ConnorOKeefe]

Of Irish descent yes! But born in the US

[@captskyz2763]

I came out when I was 13 as well but only this year

[@BlueberryCats_]

How to come out to your parents, leave this video playing in your living room and then go to your friends house

[@Puzzlecobra]

I'm only here in a totally cis way

[@giiselea]

Uh, i’m 11 but i’m not sure if i should tell my parents because they’ll tell me “it’s just a phase” or “the internet is confusing you”.