How to be indispensable, appreciated, and respected by everyone in your life

Are other people constantly underestimating you? Or do you feel like you're not living up to your potential? To gain true confidence, you need to feel appreciated and understood.
In this video, I’ll take you through my 10 actionable steps to never feel underestimated again.
In this video:
00:00 Intro
00:30 Step #1 - Do you underestimate yourself?
02:11 Step #2 - Be a giver
04:26 Step #3 - Embrace the naysayers
06:43 Step #4 - Increase your confidence
08:59 Step #5 - Stop people pleasing
10:01 Step #6 - Learn your smart phrases
11:14 Step #7 - Stay calm and move on
12:13 Step #8 - Stay humble
13:01 Step #9 - Focus on yourself
14:51 Step #10 - Always be learning
Links in this Video:
Blog Post: www.scienceofpeople.com/under...
How to Become a Networking Master with Jordan Harbinger: • How to Become a Networ...
How to Compliment Someone Without Feeling Fake: • How to Compliment Some...
5 Ways to Be More Interesting: • How to be More Interes...
14 Social Skills to Help You Win in Life: • Social Skills Everyone...
Cigna's 2018 Loneliness Index Study: www.cigna.com/about-us/newsro...
******
Hi, I’m Vanessa!
You deserve more. More influence, more income, more of what you want. I would be honored to help you.
Do you want to be the most likable person in the room? Get my FREE guide now: www.scienceofpeople.com/
My name is Vanessa Van Edwards and I’m a recovering awkward person. I’m also a multi-time bestselling author of:
Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication (www.scienceofpeople.com/cues/) Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People (www.scienceofpeople.com/capti...) and I am the creator of People School. This advanced video communication course is for high achievers who want to be confident communicators.
My goal is simple: Help YOU get to your goals faster. Never be overlooked, interrupted or forgotten again.
PS - Get our free 60-minute online trainings: www.scienceofpeople.com
+ Join the party on Instagram: / vvanedwards
******
PS - Join the conversation on social!
☞ Facebook: / vvanedwards
☞ Twitter: / vvanedwards
☞ Instagram: / vvanedwards
#vanessavanedwards #underestimated #selfesteem #scienceofpeople #misunderstood

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Check out the full article on this topic here: www.scienceofpeople.com/underestimated/

[@bijanteimourian1927]

Is it true that american army has photoelectron weapon that has an effect on brain?( x-ray laser capable of conveying electron )

[@ugoonyekwelu3269]

My Quest now is seeing how to inspire my people to commit to nation building not waiting for the government to do everything for them. Our villages are being washed away by gully erosion devastating our ecosystem, our roads and destroying peoples homes. The government has played a deaf ears and my people are sitting down hoping that a miracle will happen someday while the situation gets worst. I need you to guide me on how to motivate my people into taking positive actions to stop this erosion menace in our community. Thank you.

[@henrysantos7160]

Vanessa Van Edwards,{°❤️°} I like to say Thanks so much to your mom and dad To have a beautiful and gorgeous daughter So sweet and real smart God bless you every single day So much beauty.🌹.

[@bonjo8165]

That's it, exactly! My sister is a dream killer. But, she does give really good feed back. She will definitely tell you exactly what she thinks. Thank you, for helping so many people!

[@bonjo8165]

what do you do if you are really not good at what they want you to do or don't want to do it?

[@bart7874]

A good quest for confidence is "meet 100 people in 1 month" that could be as easy as asking for directions or trying to have a full on conversation with somebody new (has to be new people), a good way to make this even more effective is talking to people you find attractive, by the end of the month you will see that speaking to others is so much easier than before

[@conversationcorner1837]

Asking for directions should not really count. Striking a conversation with a complete stranger and holding the conversation for about a minute is where it's at.

[@stephanieholts7685]

Quality not quantity

[@Angell_Lee]

I love to be underestimated, it allows me to move in silence and make big moves until it's too late for them to want to stop me. :)

[@mikitooo]

Slayy

[@sleeprelaxation8431]

Yes

[@kogiclare1561]

My Quest the first time I listened to it was go back to school... now graduating in Oct.. (Masters, MBA) Thank you Jesus

[@bstewnog]

My new quest is learning American Sign Language and be able to have a simple ASL conversation in 2023. ❤️ Thank you for your encouragement.

[@sidrakamal3595]

Takeaways: reflect on if you underestimate yourself, operate from a position of power not need, put yourself in a project(increases confidence), listen to dream killers to improve but when need to be motivated listen to dream builders, make a list of technical skills and people skills, make list of 10 people to move on from

[@alcudiababe1]

The giving story reminds me of a talk you've done with Lisa on the Women of Impact Show because what you said about focussing on other people instead of trying to sound smart, be savvy or something like that but when you engage with the person or group of people you take the focus off yourself and you start looking for and reading into their cues and by listening to them, making them feel heard, valued that they have something interesting and worthwhile to contribute it makes sense you'd leave with offers rather than tying to drum your business across to them. It all starts with connection.

[@aylannapriscila]

I have found your videos by chance, because I'm trying to improve my English skills. However, that's a such a great content, I'm in love with your thoughts, thank you so much for them!!!

[@YourMindinBloom]

Aylanna, hi, you can reach out to me if need help with your English skills.

[@joydipmalakar7467]

I am here too to improve my English 🌝

[@aprendiendoespanol2359]

I also improving my listennig skills by listennig to her. I thougth I was the only one hahah

[@DharmaJulia]

Seem with me

[@mycoal3016]

My quest: Go to a barber and get my haircut. I've avoided barbers for 28 years. Thanks for the courage to make change.

[@haridineevikhe8549]

You are a beautiful and powerful influence in my life! I feel lucky to have found you Venessa❤️❤️❤️

[@Omnamahshivay8079]

I pledge to develop the following technical skills : 1. Excel 2. Ms office People skills . 1. Learn another language

[@bethiciaprasek9415]

Are you going to focus on one over the next month, or all four? What will you do the first month? Sign up for classes? Why do you want to accomplish these specific goals? I think all these are worthwhile to pursue. :) Looks like you are proactive which is great!

[@davidsolinski2988]

I wish I'd found this channel years ago. Not only are you breathtakingly beautiful, you're breathtakingly intelligent. Subscriber for life

[@sabermense1702]

thank you. my quest to becoming a good video editor, videographer and a good script writer just being ignited with your big words, miss Vanessa.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

I'm so happy to hear that! Honored to help ❤

[@marlonjones2460]

The success file is a terrific idea! It has become easier for me to appreciate myself more since I have limited my exposure to toxic religion. Much of my childhood and a good part of my adult life was spent in church. We were taught that it was a virtue to be humble and that all pride is sinful. I had no idea how harmful these thoughts and ideas were to my self esteem. I began to realize the main reason I felt unappreciated was because I downplayed myself to others. I put a lid on my light to allow other people to shine at the expense of my self esteem. That is no longer the case and I am still learning how to be better at this as time goes on.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you for sharing this ❤ you deserve to let your light shine!

[@brittanyjernigan]

This is the first time I've commented on a you tube video! My quest is going to volunteer at my local humane society. I want to be able to walk dogs confidently. Being able to walk different types of dogs successfully can be a challenge. Dogs can sense your emotional state without saying anything. Today is my first day volunteering. That's why I stumbled upon your videos because I was nervous about meeting the other volunteers. Thank you for the great tips. I'll let you know how it goes.

[@macavelli8905]

Best way to calm yourself is to speak it as you did,now I'm sure you did fine. And you set the the table by admitting you were nervous.

[@lauragodines8939]

Hello...so how that go with your dogs? Are they behaving good? I love dogs..but sometimes they are so disobedient...

[@eisraa.8105]

I have social anxiety that’s been getting worse due to isolation and losing almost all my social skills 😂 but i’m so glad i discovered your channel. Watching this helped me restore some faith in myself and gave me motivation to keep pushing. Thank you! 🥰

[@HabitLabPodcast]

My quest is to improve my storytelling and videos I started making on KZbin. I went from barely posting online so sharing things I’m learning and putting out videos consistently. ☺️ The success file is a great idea! I think it’s so easy to forget the how good we really when we are only focusing on all the things we don’t do right 😅. I’ll be starting one right away. Thank you

[@shynessbreakthroughcommuni826]

Love the idea of quests and to be constantly improving. If you are constantly improving, your own worth and value will increase!

[@stephanyhalo592]

Don’t find your worth in other people and you’re golden

[@brandonhunt133]

The bit about leveraging dream killers is brilliant.

[@javidmoh2295]

One of your most informative and mind-boggling vids ever! Watched it 3times and took 2A4 pages note! Thanks!

[@sylviekaiser1064]

Number 9 deserves to be #1- everything flows from

[@issakkat346]

You know I've done a lot of stuff around the city. From cleaning alot o junk that was in front of Walmart and other business to picking up trash on my way walking home. It gets frustrating cause at the time I was homeless and doing to stay warm at night. I appreciate the positive resourceful information that can help me out in all areas i need improvement on. I really hope I accomplish some in life. Thank you again ✌️

[@kirtiajmera7103]

Subconscious. Is the . thing.. you put second v by second ..that makes you a personality...no one can overnight..luv ya. More than I can.

[@isaacasdreams]

I got rid of my toxic friends and now I have no friends! She keeps me strong!! I can find new better friends ez.

[@texaslovelylady]

😂🙌🏼

[@fernandomaciel2509]

I loved the video... It's very complicated in our Globalized world not understimate ourserlves. It seems everyone is better than us... BUT, we have to switch the key, our MINDSET and feel more confident.

[@bhanu99-1]

Thanks, nice video

[@cristinareimers7833]

I need to learn how to build a solid network (technical skill) and I need to learn how to sell (human skill). Thank you, Vanessa!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

You're so welcome!

[@stericardo]

Yes Vanessa completely agree with you. Around my past I had negative people underestimated me and at the end I improve in a lot of areas of my life personal and professional, resulting on several international certifications, learn a new Language and be involve in a continuous learning process thanks a lot for your videos your improve the life of thousands people around the world.

[@nasrinakts7420]

What a video, Vanessa! I love your energy and smiling face while talking.

[@Gab963]

I am happy to have found your channel and I love your content and how you articulate every thing. I surrounded with alot of negative energy and improving each and every day by watching your videos. I love your confidence

[@zonaclinica]

This is one of the best videos you' ve made lately, it has so much useful information and you put it on a way that makes you want to do it !... A video to be seen several times, thank you !

[@kristaingleby3126]

Your Amazing! Thank you for making these videos! I NEEDED TO HEAR THIS!

[@springfairee14]

Thank you Vanessa!

[@DemiBrown]

So much value from a single video. If people actively and assertively work on 75% of the tips you mentioned, they'll definitely see improvements in their lives and relationships. Thank you vanessa❤

[@christineyoungberg5389]

Thank you for all your encouragement!! 🙏

[@YourMindinBloom]

I love all of your videos. I share them with people. Thank you!

[@MishasMarbles]

Just found you and you are my people! I too read microexpressions and feel like an awkward person and grossly underestimated! Have Captivate on order and am binging your videos. Thanks for making me feel more comfortable knowing others like me can actually be successful doing something you love!

[@aydoganilhan1]

Hi Vanessa, greetings from Turkey. I was in search of a book in Goodreads when I have heard about you. As soon as I start to digest your work online, I see improvements in myself, starting from my general mood. Your "quest" is really admirable! Thank you very much!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Wow, thank you! So glad you're benefiting.

[@kaizenborntowin]

Thank you!

[@shardagovindu]

This is such a valuable training ! Thank you, Vanessa !!!

[@amanuelageze3467]

I'm uplifted by your steps on the video right now. Thanks for carrying for those who are or fill underestimated and stand to help us. wish u the Best

[@alfredoolmedo744]

There is a Quote that blow my mind "We all have something to say or do, don't take away from the world, the opportunity to know it, by being a selfish person."

[@suzannejoseph9968]

Love the idea of Quests....and your energy. Thankyou for the inspiration.

[@rupachemudupathi9569]

Such a practical ways to over come my gosh! I actually started making my success file once I started my job , because I am said I was not doing enough , so I did it in anger that helped me further a lot ! I also have to be list but never heard of people skill list wow !

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh yay I'm so glad you tried it out!

[@rupachemudupathi9569]

@@ScienceOfPeople ya

[@hayatalturki9995]

I'm having a cup of coffee ☕️ and watching your lovely videos that just radiates a lot of energy and passion 😍 Please keep them coming, I'm sure I and so many others enjoy/need them! ❤️

[@shushanabrahamyan3464]

I’m impressed.You are amazing.Your videos are beathtaking.Thanks a lot for possitive impact.❤️

[@miriamcorrea8234]

Thank you 😊❤

[@parisjoy7875]

My technical skills I’m learning is cooking & cleaning. I just invested in joining a online group dedicated on those two. My soft skill is negotiation. I’m taking a online Yale class on negotiation. Excited for it.

[@yasminelahnin377]

You're a life saver! God bless

[@luwamzumara4361]

Wow! This is amazing!! So so informative, transformative, and relatable.

[@mels7938]

I'm so happy I found you. You have changed my life. Thank you so much

[@larraabueg645]

You're a bestie I ever needed in my life!

[@tiniciayoung]

This video is GOLD!!!!! SERIOUSLY!!!

[@chrisc6494]

you are such a blessing and amzing woman. Thank you for making those videos…Just want to add some people might seems to be dream. builders and to be positive but if they are discouraging you, they are toxic and worst dream killers…avoid them at all costs and be careful!

[@ralfj.1740]

Quests and skills are so important for building up your confidence. It's not that important what kinds of skills you have but try to be good at something! Great video Vanessa!

[@carolinehughes762]

Thank You Vanessa. Keep the good work up 😇

[@skyrenvisuals]

Your message is like an apple in a golden basket..very timely in my current situation

[@paratrucos]

Actually, I watch your KZbin videos as a mean to improve my English. Especially my listening skills. In fact, you have helped me a lot with them. Thanks so much :)

[@YourMindinBloom]

Paratrucos, hi, you can reach out to me if you need help with your English skills.

[@celesteryder5251]

Vanessa, great pep talk with concrete steps to boost self-confidence. So much fun to watch.!! I'm psyched to be more prepared and excited about choir directing so that others feel happier and more confident following my direction, and to finish painting our Church's deacon doors with prayer, grace, love and beauty.

[@angeliemandu2848]

Thank you so much

[@backyardrailroader]

I have a Done Did It bucket where I put in all of my accomplishments and events that I have done. It is similar to the Bucket List that people want to do. But mine is of WHAT I DID! As for a quest: I am redoing my kitchen. I want to finish it by the end of February 2022 ( it is now January 30, 2022). The roadblock is money for material.

[@syzygy4365]

I'm so glad I decided to revisit your videos. To be quite honest I feel like I've lost a lot of my confidence trying to rebuild my business. It's pretty unnerving when your supposed to hold your head up high and walk like a queen. I have a bunch of messages from former clients I can go through to help me gain some of my courage back. Thank you!! 🥰

[@gilroybrown9921]

Really glad I watched this. Really need to build many more people skills and be very confident. Hope I will follow your advice.

[@sumantchaudhary6866]

Thank you

[@sreckobutorac7777]

Great video. Thank you Vanessa. I've been underestimated whole my life by people mostly because of my awful people skills (I especially hate being around pushy loud people, alpha male or female type - I just can't get along with them and trying to avoid this kind of people at all cost).

[@dalegrange7503]

Hi Vanessa.. I watched many of your videos. You always try to help people And share your own experiences. I learn. Something new each time. Thanks for all you do

[@CowboyCash]

You are amazing..I love how you explain things and break things down..I am so grateful you went on Lewis Howles because I follow him and I would have never known about you otherwise..you’re amazing… Grazzi mile for your quest it’s working!

[@evelynalbina2154]

Hi I’m Evelyn J. Albina from the Philippines, I wanna let you know that I really love watching you giving ideas to encourage people become the very best of themselves, may you be blessed always! Stay sound and safe! ❤️❤️❤️

[@sabrinashaulis6869]

Wow! Your video is so informative! Its an entire workshop condensed in this 16 minute video. I took so many notes and will take the steps. As a life coach myself, I am so impressed! Thank you for giving so much of yourself so we can grow!

[@hannnahliu3252]

Thank you so much Vanessa! Your video is brilliant! About how to deal with dream killers, it’s very insightful. Instead of avoid them, embrace them! Translate their negative whistles into constructive suggestions👍

[@siddharthakumarrai3192]

Hey Vanessa ! Was just thinking about you! And here u upload, it's just so interesting to watch your videos!

[@josecosta9058]

Thanks for make difference in people's lives you're a bless to those struggles to make their lives easier

[@marilynoverton8142]

So helpful, Vanessa. Thank you so much!

[@bukolaajayi3989]

I really needed this, thank you so much

[@k.mthembi]

You Rock!!! Brilliant ideas.

[@Oshane_smith19]

I enjoy your videos. They are always informative and well exhaust. Keep up the good job

[@moshfequelalam354]

It's really a great lesson learned from this video about underestimate. Thanks again.

[@kymelabridgewater4652]

Fantastic! Thank you

[@ezb4evr]

Loved this video! ❤️

[@sayedhamidi2816]

You put your heart out for this video! thank you so much!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

I did 😊 thank you!

[@jemarfrancis348]

Ok thanks 😘

[@rbodhoo9840]

Hi Vanessa, Thanks so much for this video! Amazing 🤩 inspiring and informative. My quest will be to do yoga daily and take better care of myself. The one area I’ve neglect all my life.

[@luzbelitausa]

This is my favorite video so far.

[@aishanantumbwe8548]

Thanks so much love.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Any time!

[@timallen3338]

Totally Cool.Thanks 😎

[@guadalupefelix5877]

I love your books and all your videos. I learn from all your resources. Thanks for sharing.

[@vasudevannataraj]

I’m in a 90 day health challenge. Feeling excited. Thanks a lo for you videos...!!!

[@ekashab350]

Thank you for great work you do! My quest will be to finish you book 😊 I made lots of notes 📝 and plans)) the timing of this video was great for me 🙏

[@salimasantana1532]

you’re amazing! thank you for all your advice !

[@ScienceOfPeople]

You're so welcome!

[@VictorUmeh]

4 mins in and I'm sold. Great video! 🙃

[@ogurlz]

my quest is to finish a book a week including captivate and cues! i also would like to embrace fasting and do a couple extended fasts this month

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Amazing! I hope you enjoy Captivate and Cues ♥

[@MrTheJiugo]

Love this info. Thank you 🙏🏼

[@kevinkyzer2758]

Great job Vanessa 🙏 you explain things very well, very informative.

[@mohdh1129]

this woman is AMAZING

[@ggeoffgllnr6482]

Thanks Mom!

[@jasimrt4063]

Thanks

[@KulturaRaztura]

I loved the quote, it’s brilliant! Quite like this video.

[@satisham5885]

I am a people pleasure and this video helps me a lot. Thank you 🙏.

[@lamouralice4533]

Love your books, thank you for all the amazing details