Q&A with Vanessa Van Edwards: How to Communicate with Charisma

You gain or lose influence with every interaction. So even when you say all the right words, your non-verbal cues can undermine your leadership. Today, Vanessa Van Edwards shares the keys to communicating with influence and charisma in every interaction.
Get the free leader guide for this episode at: www.life.church/leadershippod...
Building and maintaining momentum can be extremely difficult. That’s why Craig wrote his book Lead Like It Matters: 7 Leadership Principles for a Church That Lasts. This book will help you ignite a life-giving, soul-transforming, people-inspiring movement in your organization, church, or ministry.
Learn more and get your copy of Lead Like It Matters here: go2.lc/LLIMCGLP
Learn even more about how the brain works and tools for winning the war in your mind with Craig’s book, Winning the War in Your Mind: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life. And, you can apply what you read with the new companion workbook.
Book: www.craiggroeschel.com/books/...
Workbook: go2.lc/WTWYMWorkbook
Subscribe to Craig Groeschel and tap the bell icon to get notified when the next episode releases.
Craig Groeschel is the senior pastor of Life.Church, recognized as one of the largest and most innovative churches in the United States. Craig started the Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast in 2016 as a way to bring empowering insights and easy-to-understand takeaways you can use to grow as a leader-whenever, wherever.
Subscribe to the Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast on KZbin, Apple Podcasts (go2.lc/cglpitunes) or Google Play (go2.lc/cglpgoogle) to be notified when new episodes arrive. You can also find leader guides for every episode at www.life.church/leadershippodcast.
Craig hand-picked three episodes designed to help you build a strong leadership foundation. You'll learn practical ways to influence your leaders, manage your time wisely, and improve how you communicate. Head to www.go2.lc/threekeys to get the episodes and leader guides sent right to your inbox.
About Craig Groeschel
Craig and his wife Amy live in Edmond, Oklahoma, where they started Life.Church in 1996. A New York Times bestselling author, Craig has spoken to millions of people at events and conferences in countries all over the world. Learn more about Craig: www.craiggroeschel.com/about
Connect with Craig Groeschel
Website: www.craiggroeschel.com/connect
Facebook: / craiggroeschel
Instagram: / craiggroeschel
TikTok: / craiggroeschel
Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast Resources
More from Craig: www.craiggroeschel.com
Download Leader Guides: www.life.church/leadershippodcast
Subscribe on iTunes: www.go2.lc/cglpitunes
Subscribe on Google Play: www.go2.lc/cglpgoogle
Free Church Resources & Tools: www.life.church/churches
0:00 - Intro to Vanessa Van Edwards
1:50 - Why your charisma is contagious
7:20 - How to combat feeling insecure or awkward
11:00 - How to be less intimidating
15:32 - How can you ask better questions as a leader?
20:35 - Vanessa’s tipping point in her career
23:56 - The difference between vitamins and painkillers
31:20 - The importance of wordsmithing as a leader
35:11 - Keys to charisma from body language
#craiggroeschel​ #VanessaVanEdwards #ScienceOfPeople

[@craiggroeschel]

Where would you rate yourself on the charisma scale? What could you do today to become more charismatic?

[@jamilacharles5485]

Don't werried Gód helping hands on the Head and blessed you Amen

[@altongiese4157]

Come down from intense consistency and let others whom we do life with feel and tell us how they are doing good.. asking good questions and if they are not good and make it safe to speak there heart, both to be present and also ready to cultivation

[@altongiese4157]

And 8 out of 10

[@Godisfaithful365]

the. i va. the v. x. ct

[@Godisfaithful365]

@@altongiese4157 yi y v a.

[@Tsegaye23]

Even i am not good listining at engilsh but i understand what u said Thanks for ur sharing I love ur vedios thanks million

[@aero_singh]

I cannot get my eyes off her!! She's so charismatic! :)

[@oluwatoyinfadeyibi1496]

My favorite interviews are the ones where I feel like the interviewer genuinely locked in and was taking notes for themselves too, and we were all learning together! So much value packed into this interview and well done to both Craig and Melissa!

[@minorukaraki4367]

❤さな

[@helloUnited609]

3 levels of relationships 1. general traits 2. personal concerns 3. self narratives

[@muhammadyounisyounis5728]

General.trails

[@proverbs31lifecoaching]

You’re a great interviewer, love your honesty! And her insight and practical tips are so helpful.

[@hizbkhan716]

Hi 😊😊😊

[@AbidKhan-mj4dt]

Amazing 🎉

[@RaviKumar-op1iz]

Hi

[@CathySharp]

The pressure of being positive and happy all the time will burn us out quicker than anything else .

[@ae6148]

I love to be around positive people. Negative people drained me.

[@dawnreed7583]

WOW! What a powerful interview! I first found out about Vanessa at the 2022 Global Leadership Summit. I am now reading her book Cues. It is incredibly eye-opening! the information talked about in this interview is inspiring. I will have to watch this video multiple times in order to get all of the wisdom nuggets. Love it! Thank you!

[@hizbkhan716]

Hi ☺️

[@FactsWithNour]

Oo yeah that's literally helpful 😊😊❤thanks Vanessa

[@ScienceOfPeople]

My pleasure! ❤

[@sansernyanapan9955]

Thank you so much for giving a good lesson

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you for watching ❤

[@inaiatheodoro655]

It was wonderful! Thanks a lot for all the teachings!! 😃😃

[@jesssoriano7977]

.there are people with natural talents on positivity... that is natural to them

[@RealMarcosMiranda]

This was outstanding, and I’m buying Vanessa’s book. I must say however, that the hand gestures were a bit distracting. In contrast, pastor Craig’s no hand gestures were limiting. I am impressed with Vanessa’s ability to use her hands to complement her points. The happy medium between Vanessa and pastor Craig is where I want to be at. Awesome stuff!

[@annadziekiewicz8600]

You are talking about soul pain but it is a rather sensitive speach. I acept it with thankfully.

[@alfredohernandez7469]

Remember you are force for good in every interaction you have!

[@Timberbeartrail]

This is been nothing less than amazing!!!!

[@user-iu4kn4en8p]

Interesting concept, relief emotion.

[@hatemorina4049]

Ju falemderit Ju jeni te mrekullushem gjeni qofshit bekue 😊👋

[@lasource3996]

How are you doing Morina ? Where are you living ?

[@spicymama5548]

This was really good. "The space between your shoulders and your ears shows your confidence level." Wow

[@englishwithmuzammal3596]

No one can know you better than yourself; this is (Vanessa with a happy face and oily words) all good to make you feel better. However, eventually, you are the only person who can change yourself no matter what others say or call you. Our own parents have no clue about us where we are heading off, let alone others. I hope you have a great day.

[@johnejreynolds]

Brilliant wisdom and so so helpful! Thank you Craig and Vanessa!

[@lasource3996]

I am very happy with your conversation, I have just subscribed to speak English better, I am French-speaking, it will be my pleasure to have English-speaking friends. Thank you for your work.

[@isaacphillips5199]

AMAZING! Thank you Craig and Vanessa.

[@HandmadeHomegrownArtist]

Congratulations with your family, my friend

[@RenaudAndrea]

Loved it!!

[@marietjievanderwesthuizen3244]

I love Venessa Van Edwards

[@alaaahmed6514]

Hi

[@narjun1990]

Really loved listening to Vanessa... Helps me balance out how I converse with others.

[@TalksWithYeisie]

I needed this. Thank you!

[@alaaahmed6514]

Hi

[@maklorm5381]

Best video

[@ScienceOfPeople]

❤

[@zainabdamda983]

After years of failing social interactions and years of research, finally after reading Cues I feel like I found the key to charisma, Totally recommend it

[@christopherwells4768]

This is such a confluence of wisdom! Heart and tactics to better lead my team, and my home! Thank you, Craig and Vanessa!

[@hagarhaitham1260]

thanks for this great episode which is full of practical tips. it was really my painkiller😅😅

[@adrianzurita218]

Wow!!! Loved it….. I wish all managers would hear this and put into practice.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

So glad you loved this one! ❤

[@bulusuniversity6815]

GRACE of the master ❤🎉

[@arielmojena9250]

Packed with a Bunch of Punches on how one can communicate better/more effectively. And closed with a knock-out: “And Remember: You are a Force for Good in every interaction you have!” Thank you God for blessing Pastor Craig with ability to bring Your People content that matters…and always points back to You. 🙏

[@markclark9239]

Hello you both doing so excellent 🌹 doing great always bless you both ❤️ ❤🎉🎉

[@ScienceOfPeople]

❤❤

[@keniarodriguez5049]

Great conversation. Thank you.

[@jamilacharles5485]

You said community and you give Answer around you live people everywhere

[@andersonmohammed6850]

Great content. Practical points. Thank you. Watching from Trinidad and Tobago 🇹🇹

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you for watching! 🥰

[@annadziekiewicz8600]

This is great ❤!

[@musclelegancemusclelegance5642]

This is phenomenal ❤

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you for watching ❤

[@vladislavvolkov4537]

So helpful!!

[@Jayawardana521]

It is a great discussion.learned a lot .Thanks in advance !

[@pattyshannon6475]

Great enlightening podcast. THANK YOU.

[@jessdior8177]

insightful & practical

[@saidfarid6382]

Hello professor Thank you so much for your help and advice, I really appreciate your job. I wish you happiness and peace under the sky of prosperity. All the best. Take care and have a good time. Your Student from Algeria.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Our pleasure! Thank you for watching 🙏🏻

[@simonmakokha4374]

VANNESE GOD IS USING IN A MIGTY WAY. I LOVE AND APPRECIATE YOU

[@user-cj2cx9ur9z]

Please GOD let your light shine through my soul and let me speak light intentionally for the glory of jesus christ i have everything already. Through Lord JESUS CHRIST i have the victory IN HIS NAME AMEN

[@bickycelia]

Very helpful in many ways👍

[@EugeneinOZ]

Excellent, good stuff there - thank you

[@vg1979]

Excellent questions and advice!!!! Very inspiring and encouraging tips applying to leadership!!!

[@mohammedabakar6200]

This is great conversition.

[@markclark9239]

Hello you both doing so great bless you both ❤❤

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you so much ❤

[@simonmakokha4374]

THANK YOU MY DAD GRAIG FOR SHEPHERDING MY HEART.HAPPY NEW YEAR 2023?

[@HandmadeHomegrownArtist]

This is great 😃 Keep it coming

[@ScienceOfPeople]

❤❤

[@Mani6560Xv]

Thanks Mr Craig

[@pinkpastelstudio]

Summary: [00:00] 🤖 We don't have to be positive all the time to have influence. [01:57] 💡 We can infect others with our moods, good or bad. [02:25] 💡 We can choose to infect others with good moods. [03:22] 💡 Charismatic people are more contagious. [04:21] 💡 We don't have to be extroverted to be charismatic. [04:50] 💡 We should focus on bringing relief emotions as leaders. [05:18] 💡 Togetherness is a relief emotion. [06:16] 💡 Resetting energy is a relief emotion. [06:45] 💡 People need to feel settled. [07:13] 💡 Awkwardness is a myth and it can be overcome. [07:43] 💡 Humility is an important quality for leaders. [08:13] 💡 Social fear or awkwardness can manifest in different ways. [08:42] 💡 Some people shut down when they feel awkward. [09:10] 💡 Some people rise up in a negative way when they feel awkward. [10:07] 💡 Understanding your tendency is important to overcome awkwardness. [10:36] 💡 Awkwardness can come from a deeper place. [11:05] 💡 Boss Craig can sometimes make people nervous around him. [11:35] 💡 People may feel intimidated by those who are highly charismatic. [12:01] 💡 Sharing first can help to ease awkwardness. [12:30] 💡 Asking questions that take people out of their everyday routine can help to spark conversation. [12:57] 💡 Respecting and honoring introverts is important. [13:26] 💡 Sending introverts what you're going to talk about in writing first can help them to prepare. [13:54] 💡 Having a regular icebreaker can help to set a positive tone for meetings. [21:10] 💡 Vanessa Van Edwards found her purpose by creating content that helps others. [21:39] 💡 She overcame imposter syndrome by focusing on the positive impact her work has on others. [22:09] 💡 She is driven by a desire to make a difference in the lives of others. [22:38] 💡 She always considers the needs of others before her own. [24:03] 💡 She advises leaders to speak in a way that makes people feel like they need something. [24:30] 💡 She uses the metaphor of a vitamin and a painkiller to illustrate the difference between content that is good for you and content that is essential. [25:00] 💡 She encourages leaders to identify the "painkiller" that their people are searching for and provide solutions to their problems. [25:29] 💡 She suggests structuring agendas with a mix of "vitamins" and "painkillers" to keep people engaged. [25:57] 💡 She emphasizes the importance of coming into meetings and presentations with a heart to understand and help others. [26:26] 💡 She suggests asking questions to identify the "painkillers" that people need. [26:54] 💡 She encourages leaders to go into "heads down" mode of asking questions to find out what their people need. [27:22] 💡 She asserts that people are willing to share their pain points with leaders who ask. [28:21] 💡 Ask your team members about their best and worst days at work to understand the spectrum of their work life. [28:50] 💡 Ask your team members about their worries and dreads to diagnose deeper issues. [29:48] 💡 Use open-ended questions to encourage your team members to express their emotions freely. [30:17] 💡 Pay attention to the words your team members use to identify patterns and root causes of their problems. [31:16] 💡 Be genuinely caring and compassionate when asking questions to build trust and rapport with your team members. [31:46] 💡 Express your intention to understand your team members better and to use the questions to improve their work experience. [32:13] 💡 Frame your questions in a positive and solution-oriented way to avoid leading with negativity and encourage constructive conversations. [33:43] 💡 The words you use when asking questions can significantly impact how your team members respond and collaborate. [34:11] 💡 Framing your questions with a focus on community, openness, resilience, and relief can activate positive emotions and encourage more helpful responses. [34:41] 💡 The principles of effective questioning apply to various aspects of life beyond the workplace, including marriage relationships and parenting.

[@enriquedelacruzjr4523]

Thank you 😊

[@devinatan5681]

The content is so powerful and hearten. So grateful to watch this episode. Thankyou Craig for your commitment all these years. I started as a person who knows nothing about leadership and i’ve grown a lot ever since i learn from your podcast. God bless you!!

[@ameerameer5910]

Good lessons from you and Good luck for us.

[@Ed_Jones2]

Great episode

[@BackToStars]

Very insightfull! Bravo Champion👍

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thanks for watching! 💕

[@InitiateChangeSparkPeace]

Great Video!!!

[@slcald2]

Thank you for your transparency Pas Craig demonstrations of the process of continued growth in leadership by learning listening and following cues from Vanessa.. This helps me push past my fears and do the work to become a more effective communicator.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Love to hear this! ❤

[@jamilacharles5485]

One time wach for you your Best leadership and wonderful briefing confident in all ultouer

[@droy589]

Want to learn more about Vanessa. This was an insightful session.

[@markclark9239]

Hello you both doing great so excellent bless you all 🎉

[@ShanwukanathanKesunathan-ro8gi]

Sounds good miss I happy to your speech .

[@susanshaver912]

Absolutely fascinating conversation. I am hesitant to say this but Vanessa, I had a really hard time with watching you this time, because of your super low cut blouse. May sound silly, but just some feedback. I might have to go back and put a piece of paper over the lower half of the screen so I can pay more attention to what you say. Love the suggestion toward the end of entering to give a presentation with hands out and big smile in greeting, and then touching your heart. "Remember you are a force for good in every interaction you have." Beautiful

[@marciavox8105]

That is interesting that you say that. My mom also has trouble focusing on the words of someone who is revealing more skin. On the other hand, I may get distracted at first by skin, but once the person starts talking, I stop thinking about their appearance and start thinking about what they are saying. I am four minutes into this video, and I find that her appearance isn’t distracting me as much, anymore.

[@umeshprasadsingh9648]

Unique representation of ideation

[@afradantube1866]

አንደበተ ርቱእ መሪ መሆን ተደማጭነትና ተቀባይነት ለማግኘት የሚጠቅም ቢሆንም ቃልን አለመጠበቅ እምነት እንዳይጣልብ ሊያደርገን ስለሚችል ማስተዋል አለብን ።

[@arvilsbaumanis1911]

Very good! 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

[@Mir_Sap]

Amazing

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you ❤

[@lucymartinez991]

Gosh, this has been super helpful. I recently was a part of my school reunion planning and ended up as the leader. I was so nervous. This would of given me great focus.

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Amazing! I hope it went well ❤

[@hatemorina4049]

Ju falemderit shum nga Ju jeni te mrekullushem iclutem Zotit tjo shof prap 🌍🌍🌞🌟☺️😇👍

[@craiggustafson4112]

As a new member of your church, I am was SO excited to see you interview one of my very favorite people. I am one of her certified body language trainers, on a mission to help others to escape their social awkwardness.

[@targioshow]

Very very fantastic and fascinating with new techniques and how to apply them, specially when been out of dilemma and been nervous in term of presenting something. How to build your confidentiality

[@ScienceOfPeople]

So glad you liked this one! ❤

[@heathery7953]

Great content

[@hatemorina4049]

Falemderit shum NUK dotu harroji asnihere dotju kujtoji perhere shum njerz me simpati e te sjellsheme falemderit per te gjitha

[@Timberbeartrail]

I would like for you to have an interview with her and a lot of the focus would be on like the word game. You know how that study was done and the community game in the washer game I would love to go in deep on that because it’s absolutely true changing one word will get you very different answers because of how you frame the overview

[@allenculbertson8170]

Thank you, Craig and Vanessa, and congratulations on the baby. Have a blessed day 🙏

[@sinhamohit]

Thanks a lot Craig & Vanessa, truly very insightful. One of the issues I face when dealing with these discussions is that these questions for e.g., "What's your best day at work?" feel unnatural to bring up in a conversation, or maybe come out as "bookish". Is there any way to smoothen that out?

[@daahircabdiguleed4270]

Tank's alote my teacher I like to tank your self many many times you've build my pronunciation as well as you can't image but if you think as I field That is easy I 'll pass by high marks You honest student

[@ukukukuk4679]

So sweet

[@jamilacharles5485]

This is your observations learning

[@jamilacharles5485]

You remember you come church my pastor sahib give Serman full confidence in the name of Jesus Christ King of King 👑

[@danielmoore9214]

Go girl !

[@annadziekiewicz8600]

These Words fill me a personal courage. 😅

[@vladislavvolkov4537]

I like pastor Craig waved his hands in the end 😅

[@gopalakrishnajoneboina666]

Good motivation

[@anjelopantheragok1555]

I was following in details since the file started and I can briefe the world on the presidention about these two people!! People are asking them Together why the don't show on the Social media? If they are hiding something or shine of the public let them release what is recording in side to pubish by the management!! You will see the reaction of the all community in different places!! Like cananda; American; Africa abd the whole Australia where the live in

[@jamilacharles5485]

Best of luck

[@roshanfernando9060]

Very nice talking to improve knowledge

[@ScienceOfPeople]

🙏

[@jamilacharles5485]

I think Craig groishil give you present tion good echevement beacuse I like it your leadership strong

[@hatemorina4049]

A Juve Ju falemderohem shum jeni te mrekullushem shum por edhe une ashtu apo

[@vietnguyentrong3389]

Great

[@ayulestari89]

Your video is very good 😊. I am from Indonesian

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Thank you! I appreciate you taking time out of your day to watch ❤

[@bahsaddigu9726]

thanks........

[@garraestudio6521]

Cool!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

🙌🏻 thank you!