How to Be More Self Loving - No B.S. Advice!

[@juliakristinamah]

Which one from the list could you see yourself doing a little more often?

[@oopsops8693]

Julia Kristina Counselling Hi. I think you are great, a real inspiration for humanity to say the least. Sorry. Please don't ever think im attacking you. From where I come from, from what your talking about here is a compleat fantasy in a big fantasy world. For me to be able to say to my self im doing good is unrealistic for if i was to do so somone, would here me "talking to my self" and as quickly shoot me down. If I was to just say it in my mind somone would clue onto it and rip it from me. I can't even laugh or smile without somone speaking words at me straight out of a Gatling gun. Honestly I belive im a strong minded person I have over come many obstacles in my pathetic life and I am still here unlike a heap if my mates freinds who found it to hard. The thing is I find it very difficult to hold on to any positive emotions or use any positive tools when all im sorounded by is negativity. You speak about brushing off words spoken by people you don't see regularly. Me personally would perfer to here the words than to see the sarcastic smiles or looks I get from them especially the newcomers. I have met very intelligent kind good willed honest people I have had some great friends but I seem to deem my self unworthy of their company. Or I distance my self from them worried I would be responsible for draging them down my rabbit hole. If im creeping you out pleases say. Have they spoke to you yet.

[@elisadaluz]

Julia Kristina Counselling I can trust me more. I know people see me as trustworthy. I know I I am. So it makes no sense that I sometimes don't believe me.

[@clairelariviere111]

Defini the self judgement piece! You make wonderful videos

[@arlisward2788]

Stop or limit negative self talk, stay in the present moment and the present moment is good!

[@heatherwilliams6375]

Julia Kristina counseling, how do I get to your links you leave I'm having trouble trying to find it. Love your videos.

[@GreenspudTrades]

I think many people get mean and overly critical of themselves because they were raised by parents and teachers who treated them that way.

[@bryanw9840]

Greenspud Trades: Yep, this is absolutely true

[@methib3306]

Yes true, this is root cause. Abusive parents scar their children for life .

[@maggiejiang4375]

"They tell you a bunch of nice things but they don't treat you well then those words are sweet nothing." Good point!

[@mariamistretta3860]

This video is so surprising it so much to learn to. It's good to stop negetive thoughts. People would be happier if they did that.

[@steffe9051]

At 23 I learned how to love myself as empathy I always give everyone to everything but forgot to give myself and today I asked this question to myself why I never thought to myself why I never love this person why I never look at this inner me even once and I realize I was never taught that no one ever taught me how to give something to myself but it’s ok I got to know it now and I can’t wait to make myself happy, encourage, support and love me let’s go 2023 am so excited what’s stored for me ❤🎉

[@jessicacruz2974]

Being more supportive of myself and telling myself good things, changing my self talk, and trusting myself more 🖤

[@Mirage1969no]

This is really a goldmine for building a life according to our own soul. Thank you 🌱

[@goodgodyousuck]

Self-love. Treat yourself how you want others to treat you? Damn. How could I have missed that one?

[@samumokoena]

Trust myself that's the big one for me. I am starting today to trust myself.

[@carwana]

Wow, what a change in perspective, thank you so much. I pride myself on having empathy for every soul I meet, yet for myself, I have none. This will be a huge shift, thanks again.

[@juliakristinamah]

That is MUSIC TO MY EARS!!! I'm so happy you are going to start working on being kinder to yourself - you absolutely deserve it.

[@Jil1807]

Frank Caruana I feel similar

[@tedbates1236]

There is a verse in Proverbs that says, "Anxiety in the heart weighs a man down, but a good word makes him glad." We need encouragement but rarely receive it. So we need to be good to ourselves. I have no control over someone else, but I do have control over me. So I need to not place my hope in someone else who I have no control over but make my goals something I can achieve myself because I am responsible for what I choose to do. If I require someone else whom I have no authority over and that person says no, I am likely to get angry and bitter. So I need to make goals things I can achieve God willing and not place hope in another.

[@cellardoor4199]

My mental illness has been attacking me horribly today. If I hadn't stumbled across your videos I probably would still be in bed right now. I forced myself to get out of bed, tidy up my apartment and bedroom (something i've put off for a while), take out the trash, etc. I had your videos playing the entire time while I did it. I have nothing but gratitude for you, I wish I could find a therapist like you who truly understands. Thank you for inspiring me to get up and going today, I needed it. Peace and love.

[@mrskhazelton]

I have been saying this to myself for a while now; I even have it posted on my office wall. Treat Yourself how you want others to treat you. It really changes the way you think about your own actions toward yourself. Hope you dont mind but I shared this video to my facebook group (kelly hazelton-embrace awkward)

[@juliakristinamah]

Of course I don't mind if you share it Kelly - I'm honoured! I hope you're having a good day.

[@staceykersting705]

When I need a little boost, which is honestly every hour (lol), I remind myself of something I've done recently. For example....good job on holding the door for that person. good work on sweeping and mopping, good going on eating salad at lunch, good job on taking the dogs to the park. Chances are you get a lot done most days! Conversely, if you're like me and tend to slob out, just putting even 10 minutes into being kind, cleaning or organizing will give u a boost.

[@alizayohana2474]

I’m 14 and I’m trying to love and accept my self. Thanks for the video

[@ad4316]

Julia, your tone is so PLEASANT, your humor, energy and exuberance is inviting. . I am learning how to find a new BFF within myself. I am learning thank you Julia, not to care so much about what other people think, and trying to please people so they like me. I am learning how to process of feeling instead of running, Self medicating or being defensive. You my dear are to God send. Thank you

[@SKF358]

Social media is justified by Julia, spreading such great support to many others.

[@ysites]

Excellent video Julia. Thank you.

[@beverlyvanover6452]

I did spend 20 minutes today before this video talking to myself with encouraging words! Thank you for this affirmational message today!

[@juliakristinamah]

That's so great Beverly!

[@stat9]

I love hearing people talk about good self-care or great products they like (not ads though lol), about their pets, about new useful things they heard, and when people share valuable ways of dealing with life greater. I love when people talk about art or music or movies. Since I'm aware I really enjoy these I'll emphasize these more now in my live videos I've started practicing and sharing.

[@DrumWild]

I have struggled with this for my entire life, due to things like an abusive childhood, codependency, and recently diagnosed ASD [it would have been called Asperger's]. My fiance is almost exactly the same as me. I had her watch this video this morning, because she is trapped in a highly-toxic work environment full of malignant narcissists. They're constantly abusive, and it shows. Yesterday, the UPS guy comes into the office, and she says, _"And you're here for pickup!"_ Well, this horrific transgression resulted in her being called into the office for a chat, where they warned her that _"superfluous conversations are not acceptable._ It's as if they say "good morning" under protest. I had to remind her that the job is the job, that NOBODY there cares about her at all, and they don't care about each other, so when they say these things, just remember that they DO NOT care. They are not good people. I hope that she can find a new job soon, or that I can find a job in the first place. She's had a great history of keeping work, while I struggle to keep a job after struggling to get through the interview. For me, interviews are kind of like this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/nmnMd2OKdtKsqJY I'm over 50, male, white, straight, and Autistic. In a game where you get three strikes and you're out, I step up to the plate with FIVE strikes already in place. Therapy is helping, but it's really slow. I have to fix, cure, or cope with my issues really soon, before I end up homeless and starve to death. Diabetes is another complicate, along with skyrocketing rents and prices, and plummeting wages. But the last two are just about everyone's problem. Anyway, enough Autistic rambling.

[@jonathanhinson7397]

Thank you so much. I was watching a relationship movie today that hit me like a bolt of lightning and me realize what a cowardly way I was living my life in terms of romantic relationships. I was actually sobbing and then I had one of your videos appear on my phone and I began watching one after another and I calmed down because of your kind words and presence. You are doing a great deal of good in the world by your wisdom and advice and I am sure I am not the only one who feels this way. Thank you for these videos!

[@krismccormick3909]

I love listening to your viedos. They really help and make since. Thank you. Kris

[@GenaJoy]

Trusting myself

[@pamiewatkins7354]

Be myself around my grandchildren Devotion to something I love your teaching so very good a very uplifting and make you want to love yourself from the get-go thank you

[@markmanning3796]

Treat yourself the way you like to be treated ...... that really helped ! thank you Julia your videos rock

[@braggfamilyfarm6634]

Thank you for your KZbin channel. I am battling depression. I am married, pregnant and have a toddler. I'm a stay at home Mom and I can't seem to get out of this depression. I am thankful to have some advice from someone who doesn't know me and can't judge me or make me feel like the way I feel is somehow wrong. Thank you again and again.

[@trudyparman3861]

Compliments, always make me feel better from others, but I really need to hear it from me also.

[@rikititatopolina264]

i want to allow myself more retreat from time to time to process my daily life and be able to connect with me again by stepping into nature through inhaling and exhaling and looking around being amazed by all the little wonders i am surrounded by everyday. i tend to forget about them, while letting myself being often so distracted from the overdose stress level i put myself through sometimes, which i still underestimate, unfortunalety.

[@krissynichole2416]

I am new here and my instructor at my University sends me your videos all the time and I really like you. I have a very big issue with loving and liking myself. I wish I could have you as my psychologist I could use someone like you really. If any recommendations, please let me know, Thank you for your videos it truly makes my day listening to you I listen to one of your videos each day. You help me get through my difficult times. Your a angle seriously positive energy and love light and vibes sent to you and everyone who may need it today Kristin T

[@richardalexander5758]

Thanks again...needing work on all except allowing me to be myself. Got that one! Really appreciate the time you've put into helping others.

[@jerushawanjohi8133]

Hey Julia. I'm grateful for your videos. You are my therapist. I don't come here because I have the specific problems I come here to grow. Sometimes I notice some symptoms even with other people and I love that I could pick it up.

[@jerushawanjohi8133]

Not to say that I go around fixing people, I feel it's important to clarify that..in fact I don't talk much I kind of believe that people find what they need at the time they need it most. I'm just glad I can see for example when someone is struggling with say codependency or narcissistic personality..it's amazing

[@emorywhite2666]

Another great video! Thank You!

[@projectqueen610]

This is my husband. He gives my nice card with beautiful writing. Then he criticizes my creativity. He's jealous of my friends. He makes cutting remarks about my body shape. I have taken on loving myself for the last 2 years. At first I thought this could change my husband's attitudes towards. We have some good moments,. But I have learned that I cannot change his inner voices that has him be so hurtful. I can however have more joy and full fillment in my life. I hope he comes along for the ride. If he chooses not to I can live with that too.

[@mariahwilliams5333]

You deserve so much more compassion and love ❤️

[@projectqueen610]

Thank you. I needed to see that.

[@zohranadeem731]

I'm gonna keep reminding myself that it's OK to be me thank you

[@domedweller4202]

Thank you Julia.🌹 I'm going to buy myself a bunch of flowers. 🌻🌺🌸

[@Jil1807]

I recently finally got into therapy and it really opened my eyes. I am struggling with chronic pain and Depression, an actual mental illness and the things I still manage to do are incredible despite having this illness, so why can't I be proud of myself and stop hating myself for all the things I don't succeed in doing? It's a question I start asking myself now that I stopped denying my struggles so much and finally accepted what I'm dealing with. What I'm fighting is real and now I know that I'm not making it seem worse than it actually is and my therapist makes me feel valid and seen. And I really try to be nice to myself and forgive myself. I really really try to do but it's hard. When I wake up in the morning and don't manage to even move my first thought is how much I hate myself and my life for that. I want to change this. So your video is a great help for me and gives me the tools I need to work at loving myself more. Thank you so much. Never before have I wanted to get better than now.

[@projectqueen610]

I have found thatmost of us have struggled with beating ourselves up over mistakes. One thing I've turned that has helped me move on quiker is that I need to acknowledge that I had a failure. Accept a short time of mourning over it because it is a loss. Then I forgive myself (not letting go of responsibility) but letting go of I'll feelings toward myself...loving myself anyway. : ). Allowing myself to be imperfect. I hope that helps.

[@Jil1807]

CarlaHelps thank you!

[@Jil1807]

Project Queen oh wow thank you! I will try to do the same! I'm grateful for your advice.

[@silascochran9705]

Rather than nice things I like it when people just spend time with me and enjoy it and I enjoyed our time it's a lonely world and people are trying to connect through technology rather than just connect🌻

[@silascochran9705]

❤🙂🌴🐊🌴 love right back at you

[@livefearless1123]

Thank you so much for making these videos!! You are amazing and I really appreciate your voice! Really amazing ❤️

[@home96734]

yes, very good advice. simple and awesome good values and common sense. thank you so much!

[@dianebradford5032]

The kind thing I’m doing for myself is watching all your online videos and then purchasing all of your courses. I deserve to invest in myself after investing in so many others.

[@CarrieLiz829]

I just discovered your channel from a “negative self talk” KZbin search and I just want to say thank you! I’ve so enjoyed binge watching some of your videos today on my commute to and fe work. I can’t wait to watch more and more. So incredibly helpful!!!!

[@susangoodrichlerner7819]

I found the link! Press the Show More button. Yay! I have a husband who works very hard is is not around much. Now that my children are grown, I have a lot of time alone. Being an HSP, I need a lot of downtime and quiet. I have a couple of friends in particular who respect me for who I am. My many friends trust me. The ones who don't have been removed from my ife. Many people say that I need to fill my time. They try to fix it; volunteering in particular is suggested. I have a high functioning autisic spectrum child. Being an HSP really helped be intuit his needs and teach/advocate accordingly. However, it has been extremely draining and anxiety ridden experience that will continue my whole life . I have become a very anxious person. As a result, at this point, I feel I've done my bit. Thus, I MUST treat myself well and do what I want. I know what my limits are. I may not receive the validation that other people could give me. Sometimes that makes me sad, however, I have accepted it. That's okay. People are who thay are. I have learned who I am and treat myself well. Not perfectly but I am still growing. Thank you for all your great advice, Julia!

[@mike-kn3xm]

Hi Julia, Love your talks hate to load this on you, but have lost complete love for life, this is not a selfish feeling there is just no joy, would like to sleep for a long time. THANK YOU, Michael

[@MariaSantos-gm7ps]

Thank you Julia”

[@jonwhitney9559]

keeping promises to myself

[@aprilleak4356]

Treat yourself!!

[@rondae7121]

Setting AND enforcing healthy boundaries with those manipulative people in your life helps you love and take better care of YOU

[@SunPlay96]

Thank you so much This help alot Sometime, we know all of these point but we need to be reminded daily and you have raised very clear explanations.

[@catherinevoss9875]

Spending time with myself more. I have a lot of people who depend on me and I get a lot of push back and guilt trips when I say no.

[@eilidhpyre]

I'm not long out of an abusive relationship, thanks for helping me not get into one with myself xx

[@eilidhpyre]

Oh and I'm writing what I've done that I'm proud of doing at the end of every day .... coz I can get be quite productive and i don't appreciate that enough :)

[@juliakristinamah]

Thank you, Eilidh for your kind words. I really appreciate them.

[@22022012159362]

Thank you so much for these videos Julia :) I need to start doing everything you mentioned! I’m a people pleaser and I completely forgot about myself. No more after today.

[@juliakristinamah]

You're welcome, MB! Love yourself more because you deserve it. :)

[@Sera79]

Amazing video Julia!! Thank you for it 💐😊

[@mundial200]

I have been in a down stretch for about 2 weeks now....I think it's because of the similarity of the events that also started my depression, death of a close loved one and huge self pressure from college assignments....and now it's more like I'm punishing myself for the years I slacked, and were doing college easily, no pressure just enjoying this life stage, doing half semesters with good grades, only passing when I knew the studies well, not just for that class, but for life....now since almost a year and a half in this depression I just feel like I should have been more serious about it...If not due to the depression I would have ended my degree last year....and at this stage....with this harsh hit....I don't see how I can go through it again....3 classes last year...that usually would be a semester of mine.....this semester.....This past 2 weeks I only had 3 stable/could work days....I just thought.....I would be more normal at this stage....

[@cjennings6179]

I lile to feel good & fun! I like treating myself GOOD!!!👍 i feel good! I m great! What matters to me? Many things. Good manners!! Great ideas!!

[@elisadaluz]

Great advise! Seem so obvious, but I never tought about them these way. Thanks Julia

[@elevenbyfive]

this reay helped me a lot because people are always like be nice to yourself and whatever but it's like HOW??!!! It helps a lot to have details and especially to compare it to something relatable that i know i can already do because i do it with other people. Thank you. :)

[@erikalarsson]

To listen how i really feel 💕

[@jaimeek1219]

This is such an eye opening video, thank you.

[@sureimartinez6334]

Give myself time for me and to trust myself more

[@elenadebijl6941]

Brilliant! Thank you, Julia!

[@beyondthestars8860]

Thank you so much for this advice I really appreciate it

[@bobh5087]

This was very helpful. Thank you.

[@dreamytinge8129]

I LOVE YOU!!

[@mariamistretta3860]

Self love self accept self value self time attention. self trust, self self encourment, self inspirations, worth self, self believe, self confidence, self esteem = happiness. ☺🙂🤗 Treat yourself how you like to be treated. Treat others how you like to be treated. Remind yourself of nice things. Do nice things to yourself. Pay attention to yourself. Self listen to youself. Self connection. Be yourself Be more patience with yourself. Wow so much things to know. I should do these things more often on taking time for myself. I know one people should stop get mad at themselves.

[@Motionpicturegirl]

Listen to myself when I have different emotions or a moment of weakness. Understand myself and not be upset that it is happening. Just acknowledge it and move on.

[@jamesthompson222]

thank you

[@kevinware2935]

this could be used as a mourning message while getting ready for work

[@troytempest290]

“Morning”...Nah, you were right first time.

[@voodooguitarz]

Good stuff Julia, for me self trust is a big one that can effect a lot of different aspects of life

[@juliakristinamah]

Absolutely - it's huge and definitely not something that comes about overnight. Thanks for your kind words!

[@paulaneary3662]

WOW, amazing video. New subscriber here. I am going to recommend this video to all my friends!!! I do especially appreciate it when people TRUST that I am able to hand a situation. When people treat me like I am incapable, incompetent, it is TRULY DEEPLY injurious to me and I have to say, "Well, obviously this person does NOT know me very well, huh. I thought they did, o.k." Anyways, it seems to be a particularly sensitive area to me and I am aware of it, so I try to function knowing that and not get too irritated with people. VERY helpful video. Probably will watch it several times.

[@mariamistretta3860]

Even those I do most of these things on the list. I know I'm not perfect and there are things I still need to work on.

[@bryanw9840]

Great advice! Of course it's easier said than done. I was raised to believe doing any of these things is selfish and that everyone else's needs and wants get met before mine. Thank you for the encouragement! PS: Love the Canadian accent!

[@jfreemanoliver1]

Appreciate your videos

[@ARichardP]

This is golden.

[@mooonberries]

Thank you so much.

[@binolimros1740]

Thanks a lot Julia

[@georgiefitpro8424]

I just realize that I never had time for my on self, so its time I start doing this

[@johnykryll]

Always falling down with this. My environment most of the time is a mess. I don't clean and tidy my house enough and I feel this is because I don't think I'm worth it. Motivation to clean and tidy is difficult.

[@ohyesitsyouagain]

I don’t see a realistic point in loving myself when no one else ever has. If I was so valuable, people would’ve noticed by now 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@shaki5146]

Why are others so important?

[@standufrene93]

This is so good for me thank you

[@rondone8702]

Great job

[@SabiLewSounds]

I have struggled with finding my stregths for so long. I have realized this years ago and I have yet to find an answer. It's my hope that I start doing so soon. Lol step one!

[@silascochran9705]

I am going to wear comfortable and soft clothing and not care what anyone says because it makes me feel good

[@ChanceBerryman]

Your voice is so soothing I could listen to you read ingredients off a cereal box tbh

[@ilovepeaches400]

Ashley Davis 😂

[@miriamoppenheim]

😂

[@wascallywabbit5895]

Hmm this is an interesting way to think about what it means to be nice! Never thought of it that way...

[@juliakristinamah]

Glad it gave you something to mull over!

[@grettafletcher5239]

Great video,

[@emilylumantes3614]

May i ask a question?!! What so i do with my guilt. When i try to be kind to myself my guilt ruins it all. In fact im overwhelmed with guilt. I have no idea why im so overwhelmed that i find i can not even understand guilt! Can you point me in right direction?!! Thank you kindly Continued success God bless

[@almarocha-ortiz2283]

This is the best advice i have heard, thank you so much for all you do❤

[@christianp.vallon3110]

ThNks

[@thebestwillow]

If you're in a relationship with someone who tells you how amazing and wonderful you are, but they treat you like crap, then them telling you those things is probably an attempt at manipulation as part of a cycle of abuse.

[@damarisramirez8311]

Hi Julia. I do not see the link for the mindfulness exercise?

[@marsooh302]

Underrated video

[@RavenMadd9]

I am my own enemy everyday.......I want to be my best friend.....thank you

[@michellecarollo935]

Coming aware of the toxic people in my life after losing my husband to stage 4 colon cancer. Suffering with depression and anxiety and learning how to cope after seeking treatment and being sexually harassed and assaulted by a staff member. Being alone and grieving losing all my support in social life having social anxiety. Afraid I'm affecting my daughters by being a sad depressed individual do you have any suggestions at this time mindfulness and overthinking something I'm well aware of

[@tahminadawood7250]

I want to start patting myself on the back for the things I get right, instead of beating myself up for what I don't.

[@beautifuldreamer8803]

I could do all.

[@juliakristinamah]

awesome!

[@igotbluesdevils]

Is your youtube name a Lum reference? :D

[@paulinewhalen6761]

Treat yourself the same way you treat your kids

[@absent12]

There are many times when I change myself a little for every new person I meet. I try to be a lil more like them, so they will like me. Kind of a people pleaser may be. Please help! Why am I doing this? How can I change? I wanna be myself & be proud of myself.

[@Suziesuzi]

Is it just me or is there someone singing in the background? Great advice :)

[@michelleabigailpepillo7997]

Can i join the group? the link i didnt hear clearly

[@oopsops8693]

The manipulators first tool....be nice understanding. Is this the manipulators hand book.

[@carbidejones5076]

you make some sense