How to Brush Off Rude Comments About Your Gray Hair

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Have you had any negative feedback or has it been smooth sailing so far? Let me know! (Also - I'm having trouble getting closed captions to show up. Will keep trying!)

[@kimelainewrightralston9916]

Hi, Kim. Here, I have been going gray for a while. My hubby bought me a box of dye. ROFLMBO. Not using it. My hair is down to my bottom. I have beautiful SILVER! ❤ IOVE THE SALT AND PEPPER look I am rocking the silver. My gray is coming in a really cool way, I am so happy. I am so excited to have found you.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Hi Kim! It sounds beautiful 🤩 !

[@patriciatuara7021]

Hi Katie, love the witty comebacks. My 1st time I ditched the dye and buzz cut my hair so a double whammy. In my country women grow their hair long, dye it black and wear it in a bun. I walked into a work meeting w my new look and 1 man had a look of shock, 2 said I looked old and 1 said I looked like I have cancer. I think the men were threatened that I was challenging the status quo. The women weren't rude but they didnt say anything supportive either. I dyed my hair. 2nd time around and now 5 months in with a pixie and tri colour hair no negative comments. In fact I get positive ones from the young people who think I look edgy. Some dye their hair platinum blonde😊 A friend was telling me she loves my natural hair colour and says her dye is burning her scalp. But she, like most women and a few men, continue to dye their hair. At 63, I'm the oldest at work. I ❤ being different, creative, and energetic but most of all I love my hair.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Hi, Patricia! I'm so happy for you that it worked out well on your 2nd go-round! Your style sounds fantastic! You might end up inspiring a lot of the women around you.

[@mistyfiello5262]

I didn’t get negative comments. I got backhanded comments. I went gray pretty young. I was in my early 40s when I first went gray. I did go back to the dye bottle. And I totally regretted it. I’m now 44 and about 5 months in.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

I’m so sorry to hear you had that experience. I’m glad you didn’t let it stop you from trying again!

[@Susan-ek2sv]

Great suggestion to jump right in with "...and I LOVE IT!" before they can say anything negative!

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Thanks! I learned that early on and it helps!

[@PoetiqueMs]

My husband worked with a man who had pure white hair. He showed up at work one day with dark dyed hair. His WIFE told him she didn't like walking around with an old man. She isn't a lot younger than him. His hair looks so fake to me, and I feel sorry for him having to keep up that charade.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

I'm sorry he felt pressured to dye it. I can't imagine talking that way to my husband (or anyone)!

[@tonjataylor710]

Hey, Katie! Once again, I missed this live,🙈 but so happy that I could still enjoy it later - it was great! Sadly, the rude comments are so unkind😭 As women, we are a 'sisterhood' & it's mind-blowing to me that some women treat other women like that! The comebacks were awesome, though!🤣😂 I haven't really had anyone be rude to my face, but a woman I know who is more of an acquaintance, than a friend, did come up to me and say, 'I'm kind of thinking you may be growing your gray out, since your hair looks like it's been more than just a couple of missed appointments, right?' And then she proceeded to ask me why I had decided to do it. I took this as an opportunity to let her know my reasons and how I finally came to the decision to 'go for it!' After hearing these rude comments, I feel blessed that my friends and even total strangers have actually told me that the shade of gray/silver that is coming through looks like it will 'suit my eye color and complexion.' One of my closest friends said a very uplifting and supportive thing to me - 'You are rocking the transition stage!'😄 I didn't mean to write a novel,🤦🏻‍♀️ but I just want to end by saying that I have to be careful not to get on my 'soapbox' and be 'a reformed smoker,' so I NEVER suggest to any of my friends they should do what I'm doing, but deep down inside - if I'm being totally honest - I feel that the ladies I've seen who have embraced their God-given, lovely silver hair look tons younger than the ones who are still coloring their gray, for the sheer fact that most women my age (close to 60) do not have the shade of hair they had as a young girl, so they aren't fooling anyone! 😉 It can even sometimes look a little odd when their hair is colored, because their faces don't match the youthful shade and it can almost cause the opposite affect of making them look older - does that make sense?🤷🏻‍♀️ Anyway, you were fabulous as usual, Katie - perfect comedic timing! I'm so sorry that you get a little nervous. I feel bad when you can't breathe and get light-headed, but I'm sure after a few more live videos, it will not affect you that way (I pray🙏🏼). Just know you are blessing us with all of your helpful information and with your kind support! You're living proof that the 'struggle' is worth it - your hair is beautiful! Thanks for your positive attitude (it's contagious) and for being the perfect cheerleader for all of us!😍❤️

[@eileenfh7834]

I agree with everything you said ESPECIALLY about how many women still coloring their hair are not doing themselves any favors -either their color is not good or it doesn’t match their current, older skin tone. Natural gray is the best and my hair now looks healthy and shiny again!

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Thank you, Tonja! I'm hoping that doing these more often will help my nerves as well 🙂 I feel the same way you do - I never proselytize, I never try to convince anyone to go gray (because it can be difficult enough even for women who really WANT to do it!) but now that I'm on the other side, I do find that gray hair is more flattering to the complexion as we get older. I feel like I look younger than i did 10 years ago (even if I don't feel younger due to aches and pains)!

[@Heavenwalk55]

Hi! I live in Bay Area, California. Im 11 months in and have never had any negative comments. I did have one stranger say she loved it, in the grocery store 🤗 My loved ones are very supportive. I don’t solicit comments. I just do what I feel like doing. Its possible strangers look At my hair, but i am not aware if they are mortified 😂😂

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

That's great! Most comments are supportive, from what women have told me, but boy some of the stories I've heard! So it's good to be prepared in the off chance it happens.

[@Abe-rz1nm]

You know what I hate more than rude comments? Staring everywhere I go. I've had no rude comments, but if I did at least I have something to respond to. But when people stare, there's nothing I can I can do or say. I can feel them staring as I approach, I can feel them staring from the side, as I pass, and no I'm not being paranoid. Women do it the most, and it's obvious. It's worse than the comments. I don't know how I'm going to handle being stared at for another year.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

I know what you mean. I had a man stare at my roots so hard that he walked into a table and almost knocked it over! People seem to stare more during the transition phase - I'm hopeful that will end for you once you're fully transitioned (and then they might stare at you because they love it so much!)

[@jenjen2824]

The transition phase is rough. My hair was dyed reddish-brown when I decided to go silver so the demarcation line and the difference between the warm and cool tones was stark - ESPECIALLY in outdoor lighting. By the 7th month people stared hard at my roots and talked to them instead of meeting my eyes. I actually considered saying, "Hey, my eyes are down here." 😉 In three days I almost gave in and re-dyed my hair twice but my daughter talked me out of it and told me I'd regret it if I did. I knew it was obvious that I was growing out my hair at that point and, as I looked around, I saw other women of different ages growing out their hair too. My hair is a little past shoulder length and I cut mine in layers and cut an inch or two off the length every couple months to speed up the process. I just kept living my life and time passed and 2 years later I'm completely grown out and happy about it. You do what is best for YOU! It is your life, your hair, your time, your wants, and your life goals. Nothing says you can't re-dye your hair if you want to. It won't make you a failure. When people stare just smile at them, wave, and be friendly. They are just curious.

[@cherizzle-hp3tp]

Aww i missed this live. I watched it just now with my breakfast :) Great come backs Katie. I have had women look fearful for me lol. But i talk positively and say i no longer want to fight the natural me and that i feel privileged to be getting older. I have even inspired one woman to ditch the dye already! Im nearly 6 months dye free. The contrast is pretty obvious with my brunette hair. Makes the silver stand out alot more. (I am 35 but when people see grey hair they automatically think old lol).But im sure most people are nice enough not to offend me. And if they do, i honestly do not care. Love your hair Katie. Keep up the videos.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

thank you!

[@kerryparker8925]

Thank you for your videos. You keep me inspired. I’m only about 4 months in but I’m determined to see it through. This year is my year of confidence and I’m really working on a more healthy and positive lifestyle. So going grey fits right into my new way of living.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Wonderful, Kerry! I hope you have a great transition :-)

[@eileenfh7834]

Sorry I missed the livestream but I just watched the video. Loved it and all the great comebacks for rude, unsolicited comments.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Thanks, Eileen!

[@cynthiarozyckie5702]

I'm only 6 weeks in, and I am amazed and saddened that people would make such rude comments! (Guess we shall see in my upcoming months) WOW, just WOW

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Yeah - people are crazy. But not everybody experiences this - a lot of it really depends on where you live and who you hang out with.

[@loriwagner2766]

Hi Katie - I’m so late to this video but I wanted to comment. I am over 2 years into my gray transition. I still have about 3 inches of colored hair on the ends yet. My hair is a few inches past my shoulders. I’m from MN and I haven’t had many negative comments at all to my face. Side note - None of my coworkers have said anything about my hair & I’ve worked with these same people for over 25 years. I’m sure they have talked behind my back about it, but I love my hair & I don’t care. 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

I'm so glad you love it - that's all that matters! None of my (male) coworkers have mentioned it but I'm actually kind of jealous that your female colleagues haven't. I didn't get any negative feedback, but lots of talking RIGHT in front of me about how they'd NEVER do it. It was kind of awkward (but since it's fully gray now I get a lot of compliments from them, which is nice). I kind of miss the grombre look - enjoy it while it lasts! But it's also fun to see yourself fully silver 🙂

[@annpoelma]

Great post! Thank you!

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

You’re welcome!

[@evasingh7231]

Hey Katie, I love your channel and you are so cute again🥰 I live in Germany and in general it is accepted to go grey. But my husband doesn’t like for example- and I am also not sure, if I‘d like it, or not- after fully transitioned. Your grey looks so beautiful, mine is more mousy and not really nice. Maybe I still got to wait for more natural highlights- let’s see.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Hi, Eva! I’m so glad you like my channel ❤️. I wrote an article that addresses what to do if you don’t like your gray hair - I might have some tips in there for you! katiegoesplatinum.com/hate-gray-hair/

[@peek-a-boo7877]

You should have told that man in church that this is the color God blessed you with. He wouldn't want to offend the Lord.

[@eileenfh7834]

Katie -Can you recommend a leave-in conditioner for gray fine hair? I tried the BOLDIFY Thickening Spray but the fragrance was too strong. Thank you.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Hi, Eileen! I wish I could, but I honestly can't think of any that don't have a strong fragrance. You might want to go into one of the gray hair Facebook groups and ask there. I'm sure someone would have a great reco!

[@KathyGales]

What do you say to your husband who hates your grey hair

[@QuickSilverHair]

Eileen, check out Seen fragrance free Blow Out Creme. It’s great for fine hair and a little goes a long way.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Re: your husband, I think it’s best to say something like “ I’m sorry you don’t like gray hair, but I no longer want to dye it so that’s what I’m going to do.”

[@KathyGales]

Great video

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

Thanks!

[@marylouisemillner523]

Fortunately, my husband supports my choice to go gray. But once a lady said, gray? Well you can always wear a wig.😂😂😂

[@happymusics]

Within this week I had 2 insulting comments about my gray hair. I'm mildly bothered by them but it's something that I look forward to since I was in my twenties because my reasoning was, how awesome it is to be able to grow old, to live long enough to get gray hair. It's like a halo of glory and wisdom of old age. Now that I am old, I actually don't dye my hair because I don't like the feel of the hair when I dye it. It's coarser and rougher. My question is, what gives people the right to comment on my hair?? Geez.

[@KatieGoesPlatinum]

I know! I don’t understand how people can feel so free to comment!

[@donnaweingarten3007]

Hello