How to cope with fear of weight gain & Guilt

[@mariafahim5]

This is the biggest, but best coincidence that has occurred today. Yesterday night, I went out and bought a packet of chocolate filled biscuits. Reason being is that I told myself that today I was gonna try challenging my ED once again in hopes of overcoming something small at least. As soon as I was done with those delicious biscuits, I felt like the most disgusting person in the world. So much guilt got a hold of me yesterday, that I promised myself that as soon as I woke up the next morning, I wasn’t gonna eat anything because I knew when I would check the scale, my weight would’ve gone up a little. And so today when I got back home already knowing what I was gonna have for lunch (1 single grilled chicken breast) I found out that my mom ordered one of my favorite foods in the world for lunch today and that plans for lunch had changed. I ate half of it, thought to myself for a few minutes and went back to eat the entire plate. I felt gruesome. So I came to the bathroom, hoping that I will be able to excrete all of it out, but then I see your video and title on my recommendation. You do not know how much you’ve helped me throughout your videos, but this one almost feels like it was made for me. Thank you.💖

[@alextom5270]

And this is the worse mistake done by ED services-they focus on bmi.Whats is silly cos on one side they says its a mental disorder and weight dont matter but on another site-they all the time weight you,speaks about food,weigjt,scale,calories O.o

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Alex Tom it’s ridiculous! Totally disagree with services! Meal plans are soo restrictive! And BMI is so bullshit! Xx

[@alextom5270]

Exactly...I refused weight ins for so long cos I asked them how they want me to be better if I was constantly weighing?Its obvious that Ill be restrict more cos I will freak out about numbers on there.They giving you meal plan and then when you want something extra-you cant cos meal plan not allows you.Its really something wrong with services🤦‍♀️

[@moonchild07613]

It's like they teached me just to eat....

[@moonchild07613]

Now I only want to eat my whole money just spend for that...

[@annerittwage1401]

@@alextom5270 I didn't want to know my weight at the first two weigh-ins, because I felt it might be harmful for my recovery, and I told them that. They said it was the other way around, that if I didn't look at the numbers, it would be a sign of me not being well yet. I think it's bullshit. Before I went to the hospital, I ate food. It was very low in fat and low in cal, but I ate. And then I came in and it was sooo restricted and I had half-portions and I cried because I was so hungry and felt so guilty about it. Before I could eat certain things that I can't eat now. It's crazy. Because I followed my plan to a t. I was very hard with the staff if I saw them put on too little or too much on my plate, it had to be exact. They made my ED worse in there.

[@genius2655]

I sort of ‘reflect’ on my thin, quasi self, and catch myself wanting to go back to looking like that. Wanting to feel like that. It sucks, because it sounds completely rational and desirable to me, until I wait for it to pass. It’s truely a mental battle on the daily. I have to stop and think that I am me, and I am beautiful in my own way. Like the colours red and blue, they’re polar opposites, yet some people love the colour red, some people love the colour blue, and some people love both or neither, they like something else. It’s the same with people.

[@petitehippie7064]

I completely understand. I feel the same way. I am grieving my old body. I am completely preoccupied. It's really annoying. Recovery is definitely worth it though. I have to remind myself, I don't ever want to be like that again. Good luck in your recovery.

[@michellecolledge2355]

I have gone back several times. It is so difficult, I know. I still think the annorexic me looks better.

[@usamimiyako6648]

You look really pretty with your hair short 🥰 could you speak about muscle loss and the influence on metabolism, how do you cope with that?

[@leahj1613]

Your talks honestly help so much, you’re an actual saviour, we can tell hell much it means to you and you’re so passionate and it makes us realised how important your words are, you might not realise it but you’ve probably saved so many lives, I love you and I love watching your journey , keep going because you’re an inspiration 💕💕💕💕

[@selintuncs]

I decided gain weight and I ate whatever I want in front of my parents but now my fear is come back and I just try to prove myself to mom which is so hard. Help me pls

[@emarendulic8832]

Words can not express how much I love this girl. You don’t know and you will never know how much you helped me and how much I appreciate you and your talks! You are amazing, keep going strong and we will bEAT this together🥰🥳💙

[@sophie.kayleigh3726]

This is exactly what I needed to hear today after a tough day, going to keep fighting though! Also that colour yellow looks absolutely stunning on you 😍❤

[@recoveredbakes3675]

sophie.kayleigh Thank you!! 🥰

[@recoveredbakes3675]

UPDATED THE DESCRIPTION WITH THE CARDS: etsy.me/2GBQTRM xx

[@mold7581]

You look so good! Shining and sparkling! ❤️✨ gaining weight makes you look way better than before! That’s a good motivation for me, thanxx🥰

[@recoveredbakes3675]

M Old Tjank you!! Xx

[@emarendulic8832]

And I would like you to talk about comparing!! I constantly compare myself to my little brother and I can not help myself🙁🙄

[@nathyavila]

Thank you so much, I have been watching your videos and they have helped so much during my recovery, you are an angel

[@nokkajaakko1411]

i had relapse but i really want to recover now so i came to watch your videos and i can say that you are the most inspirational recovery channel ever!

[@recoveredbakes3675]

nokkajaakko thank you so much! I’m so proud of you please never stop fighting! Xx

[@haylslouise8428]

I've had a fast metabolism all my life so I've always been naturally thin, in fact I was in great shape but I've suffered with severe body dysmorphia for as long as I can remember, and that was the trigger for my restrictive eating as I saw myself as fat when obviously I wasn't, I never gained a single pound! :( I only restricted for a month and I recently started eating again and I'm already experiencing extreme hunger! How is it possible after restricting for a month only? I lost quite a lot of weight quite quickly which probably explains it tbh :( I absolutely want to gain my weight back but I'm terrified that my healthy fast metabolism has crashed and I'll be susceptible to gaining a lot very easily and become overweight for once in my life! I worry I'll never get my shape back! :( will my metabolism go back to its speedy state? And will I return to the healthy weight I was at a month ago?

[@annaschuster81]

I am currently sitting here..eating a whole bag cini minis after 1 package of cookies and 2 bars of chocolate..this video helps a lot! Eventhough I ate 3 meals and 2 snacks before I ate this all in one sitting and I am not so satisfied. Can you relate to this? It's so expensive..

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Anna x yup! Recovery can be pricey but I promise you the more you eat the more your hunger will begin to settle! X

[@annaschuster81]

@@recoveredbakes3675 so this also happened to you?

[@juliegiortsou3553]

Thank you so so much, I really need this.. also after watching, I ate my afternoon snack without any 2nd thought..!

[@marie8669]

You're so cuuute haha and it's so lovely to see you so lively and vibrant

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Mayfe B thank you!! Xx

[@musicalconnie6216]

You are so wise and genuine! It warms my heart to feel all the compassion you have for everyone who's struggling and I think you'll make a fantastic recovery coach with your inspiring words and caring nature

[@aftersunliv]

This is truly beautiful. You are amazing, your kindly spoken words, your power thru them and that you got so emotional. As I’m recovering for third year now, and I overshot my weight I can truly say that your mindset is a mindset everyone should have. Thank you so much, sending lots of love 🖤

[@miamerces4913]

Honestly you’re a young KZbind but I think you are the realest and more inspiring and fierce one out there in regards of ED

[@unknowngirl-1349]

Oh wow Thank you so much this is so helpful. You are a fighter Emma and you will win.❤️

[@edensmith638]

Been follwing your channel for a while, and it is so amazing to see your journey. You have so much strength and you are truly glowing and look stunning.

[@dariahyjek7557]

I needed this so much! Today has been quite tough so far... I discovered that my favourite super skinny jeans don't fit me anymore and some other clothes are also too tight and that made me soo depressed and ashamed of myself. But now, after watching your video I'm starting to feel better again and I hope that tomorrow will be better.

[@aliceincrazyland3946]

Daria Hyjek that was honestly one of the hardest parts of gaining for me... the clothes that you’d come to live didn’t fit any more or were getting too tight it was frustrating and embarssin... so I did exactly what I didn’t want to do. I threw them out. So hard but so worth it

[@nocturnalbutterfly2280]

Thank you so much! I’m glad I ran into your channel. You are so strong and inspired me to CHOOSE recovery and realize why it’s worth it! 💚

[@chocolateoreo6489]

You are so pretty and look so slim and healthy I'm so happy for you (:

[@Amypj]

Would you ever do videos with your sisters?

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Amy Louise My Dad is up to doing a video with me, and I’m guessing my elder sister would do one too! Xx

[@Anonymous-ef6tb]

Wow, you look so beautiful rn! 😍 seriously, your weight gain made you look sooo much hotter haha 🔥

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Anonymous Thank you!!

[@miamerces4913]

You look so much healthier it’s amazing girl props

[@i_h2081]

Thank you. You look amazing and this video is so useful

[@Fairybreadgal]

Loved it!! Very helpful and just well said 🙌🏻💛

[@ellaeaton9316]

Emma you are honestly amazing!!!!!💗x

[@celiadepatoul8553]

How do you know if you overshoot your weight?

[@Clairvoyantkel]

And yet my weight hasn’t moved from my stomach and I’ve been weight restored for almost 6 months 🙁 why can’t my weight distribute so well like yours

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Ke L everyone is different, it can take years for it to redispute, it won’t be until your body is fully healed until it does! Make sure your a 100% eating unrestricted

[@fightcarb956]

Mine too...i've been struggling with that so bad. ☹

[@genius2655]

We may not know if hers has redistributed, we don’t see her full body, only shoulder up. So try not to compare, and trust the process

[@genius2655]

Also everyone, often if this isn’t your first relapse (like myself), or if this is your first recovery attempt, still, your hormones are way out of balance. Your progesterone and testosterone is too high and your oestrogen too low, meaning you store fat in your stomach and thighs. It will even out eventually, just wait

[@Clairvoyantkel]

Thank you guys xx

[@ani-chan7965]

You're so beautiful and inspiring! I admire you so much. I'm so glad you make these videos because I really needed to hear this today♥️ Thank you.

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Ani-chan Thankyou!! Xx

[@inescastro1179]

Thank you so much sweetie❤️🙏🏻 I needed this sooooo much🥺 thank you thank you ☺️

[@kay-zi3zr]

I’ve always had thin hair but it’s been falling out like crazy and I hate it! It looks awful and I’m scared people will really start to notice. I’m trying to increase my calories but I feel guilty cause I already upped them recently. I don’t anymore :(

[@witchylau]

It was SO cute when ou started tearing up :') Thank you so much for all that you do, you're so helpful !

[@ayeishaevelyn6184]

Bawled my eyes out watching this ngl 😂 Really love how raw this is, so inspiring ❤ thank you

[@justagirl1857]

What If a healthy weight is underweight?

[@bethanymunn3068]

Thank you for this! It was needed xxxx

[@hatsmama514]

Thank you so much Emma. You’re a ⭐️

[@yanarachaluco1039]

Your so gorgeous x

[@niamhbayes3397]

U remind me of Drew Barrymore

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Nxxve e oooo never had that before! Love her though! ❤️

[@niamhbayes3397]

I think it's your voice even though your accent is different ! Xx

[@kaelynnmercier628]

i needed this today 😇❤️

[@ani-chan7965]

Also, could you give me a link for those recovery cards you showed?

[@recoveredbakes3675]

Ani-chan Just updated description: etsy.me/2GBQTRM xx

[@ani-chan7965]

@@recoveredbakes3675 Thank you 💕