How to Homeschool When Kids Have Bad Attitudes and Siblings Fight

[@EmilyVakkilainen]

One of the most effective tips I've learned as a mom of 3 active boys (now a baby daughter as well) is to practice the GOOD behavior. So if a child slams the door, he goes back and shuts it softly; if he answers rudely, he answers again nicely; if he says something mean to his sibling, he then says something (or three things!) nice to them. The good practice is also particularly effective when there isn't any problem and can even become a fun game. That helps to reinforce good habits rather than just honing in on the bad ones. Another tip (in addition to the great ones you've already mentioned, thank you!) is to keep the children busy helping me and doing positive things. They find so much fulfillment in being useful (even if it initially slows me down), and the time together creates great child-parent bonding, so that they have less desire to be disrespectful or disobedient to their best friend.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

This is great advice! Thanks for sharing so we can all benefit!

[@fatihakhan4381]

It is a good idea to keep them busy for helping. But even though they like to help us they compare themselves to each other a lot like " Mum actually i threw out the trash yesterday" and the other says 'ın fact i washed the dishes more than her" and then i say (with anger) never mind i can do it. And then they say no we will do it. This trigger me a lot.

[@brpeck]

I truly appreciate that you take the time to put these videos together. I have felt very frustrated at times and when I go looking for ideas, so many 'help with kids or homeschool' videos are moms with 2 kids saying how tough it is... I'm a homeschool dad with 7 kids (so far) with 4 school age and 3 littles. Your practical, calm, yet realistic walk through of these issues just helps me think through things as I've found being a dad at home I lack a support network as I know no other at-home dads to talk through stresses with. So, long story short, thank you and I hope you keep up the videos!

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Thank you so much! I'm glad my channel has encouraged you! It's nice to hear of some dads out there homeschooling. I love seeing dads involved in the education of their kids. And I agree, it definitely is a different dynamic with multiple kids. Keep up the important work you are doing!

[@michellebatac1336]

Great video. I have a child who just turned ten. He’s has the absolute worst attitude about all things school. We had a long chat. He needed me to be next to him more. He basically said he thought he needed another year with me just like a kindergarten kid would. After our chat, we set the consequences of bad and good attitudes. Zero tablet time for a bad attitude, extra time for good ones. After one day of needing to follow through, he has changed significantly! His dad had a talk with him, it’s not about school, it’s about attitude in general. I was so happy my husband caught that little piece! Those eye rolls and huge sighs, have stopped, and the whining about reading and math practically gone in under a week! I have 4 younger ones, and they have all had to be told this and needed a few days , but I’d say follow through and consistent expectations are absolute key.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

I completely agree! Consistency is so important. I'm glad you were able to find some solutions that worked well!

[@Beautyforahses]

Even the simple knowledge of knowing that it’s not just my kids, encourages me. Thank you so much for sharing these tips ❤

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

I'm glad this encouraged you. You are not alone! You're welcome! :)

[@jellib.110]

Thank you for the helpful tips. You're right, the last one is most important. In fact, just today my older two children (12 and 10 yrs.) were rushing through school to get it done fast, something that's an ongoing trial for us, when I told them that school wasn't "done" yet because we needed to address our character. Education is so much more than books, math, LA, etc. Thank you again. I'd love to hear your perspective on encouraging quality schoolwork vs. trying to rush to get it done fast. That would really be helpful to me and probably many other families too. Blessings!

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You're very welcome! That is an interesting question about quality school work vs. trying to get it done... Let me think on in a bit...I'll definitely keep it in mind for a future topic!

[@jerilyn-ourhomeschooltable]

My daughter has been really liking to work in her bedroom at a desk. We also use a lot of charts for things. Morning chart, chore chart, school checklist. It helps her know what the expectations are without me having to tell her all the time.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

That's how my oldest daughter is as well! I love the idea of charts! Great visual reminder for them.

[@svenandruthie]

Thank you, this was a great talk on the reality of homeschooling. I have 9 children and one thing that I need to remember is the importance of prayer. "Except the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain that build it" - Psalm 127

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You're welcome! So, so true. So often it's the most effective, yet underutilized tool we have at our disposal.

[@hardingsinaustralia]

Thank you so much for your videos! This has video has been a huge encouragement. I homeschool and have 7 children. What has been helping a lot lately for the general behaviour of my children is getting out in the morning for a few hours to exercise before coming home to do school work. Thank you for your encouragement. :) Martine

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You are welcome! I'm so glad to hear that! Oh that's a great tip! I love to go out walking as well. Fresh air and sunshine is good for everybody.

[@MamaJeanMontessoriMusic]

Your sharing is so relatable and comforting! Such good advice that some days need to just stop and focus on the family or take a breka together when things aren't working out. And that's more important than accomplishing anything else.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Thank you! :) So true! I've realized that more and more having older kids.

[@nakitabanana]

No experience, but grateful for the tips. I typically have us push through bad attitudes (mine included), but have been convicted lately that this may be causing more harm than good. Thank you for the reassurance that a break is more important; our relationships are more important.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You're welcome! Yes, I say family first every time! Home comes before school. It's a sure way to make more progress.

[@ramirezsulema87]

This is my favorite homeschool channel! I enjoy the topics and how you layout the information for us! God bless you and your sweet family ❤️

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Oh, wow, I'm honored! Thank you! So glad you like it. :)

[@jennaaw9073]

You and your gentle spirit are an inspiration. Thank you for sharing.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad this encouraged you!

[@nicolestephen2126]

Thanks for another great video and thanks for being so real! In our home there is a lot of conflict, and what has helped the school related conflict is separating the kids to have their own subjects (e.g. not doing geography, science and history as a group. The conflict and competition we had with the family style learning was creating big problems for us. Also, lately talking though actual steps of how to resolve conflict or just let things go has been helpful. You're right though, it is a constant part of parenting and homeschooling, but learning to navigate it well as a parent is good for all of us! Thanks for your great content!

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You're welcome! I think it's great that you were able to see that the family style learning wasn't working and change course! Sometimes it can be hard to let go of things like that, but it's another reason why we need to do what works in our own families and not feel the pressure to do it the way we think it's "supposed to be done" or the way others are doing it. I'm so glad you are enjoying my videos! It's nice to hear feedback!

[@Scary_Sary]

Thanks for this. I have 3 7 and under and am pregnant on 4th and find the fighting exhausting. My two younger girls fight all the time and they’re very young, 2 and 4, so I don’t even know if I can reason with them over that. Most of the time my own attitude is the problem and I turn into a drill sergeant. Doesn’t help I’m generally exhausted! I think putting Jesus first is the answer, life at the moment is rolling out of bed and getting straight into it, but I probably need to try prioritise quiet time with the Lord first to fill me up.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

It's not an easy job. This job is too big for us. We definitely need God's wisdom and guidance every day. I hope you can find some good solutions to help you. It's not easy, but by God's grace, it is doable and very rewarding in the long run!

[@janesmith8316]

I have experienced my children purposely being fussy at each other and then suggesting that we take time off from our books to do something together. Yep, it takes boat loads of wisdom and discretion to raise children.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

It truly does!

[@amandabeach9995]

I love how these are simple to implement and straightforward

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Glad to hear that!

[@SoyAnnySandoval]

Wow what an amazing video! Confirmed so many things for me. Momma of two toddler - back to back boys and I just want to cry some days 😂😂 loved listening to your wisdom and so blessed to have a husband who sees this exact thing you’re sharing… and is also willing to get in the dirt and read to them and teach the things I cannot 😂 thank you for sharing! So nice to hear from a mama who’s way ahead 🙌🏻🤍

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

Thank you so much! It's nice to hear how this helped you. I can relate to wanting to cry some days, ha! It's not an easy job, but so worth it.

[@josieeanthony]

Thank you!! I think this was my question that you quoted. Youre truly an inspiration and a great mentor for me. Wonderful and practical to video. I loved the *perservere* advice. Wonderful. 🙏 God bless you.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

You are so welcome! Oh good... glad you saw it! And I'm so glad it was helpful to you! Yes, persevere...we are raising the next generations! Blessings!

[@emilyribnicky9410]

Loved the tips! I feel like these are definitely things I do to keep my four kiddos getting along most days. The hardest one for me is when it's me that needs to calm down. Going to try that whisper trick! Also having realistic expectations of myself of what I can actually get done in a day as far as housework goes will probably help. The kids do get into more fights when mama is busy cleaning! I try to have them participate, and my 7 year old is very helpful but the 5, 3 and 1 year old, not so much!

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

I'm glad! And so true about having realistic expectations for what we can do in a day!

[@bonniet6275]

This is great advice and encouragement. Thank you 🤍

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

I'm glad it was helpful! You are so welcome!

[@a_radom_user794]

I have a 14 yr old high functioning autistic son, and he has no motivation to do his work. Has anyone one here had issues with this, and if so, what things have worked for you? He is way behind in his work.

[@OurLifeHomeschooling]

I have not had this specific situation, but I'm sure there is someone on here who has. I'd love to hear from others who have some good input! Personally, I would keep going with consistent lessons, but keep them short. And if you find anything that interests him, go full steam ahead, helping him learn by interest.