How to reset your body from chronic stress Dr Gabor will uncover reason why we get chronic illnesses

How to reset your body from chronic stress Dr Gabor will uncover reason why we get chronic illnesses #trauma #stress #chronicillness #gabor
Dr. Gabor Maté is a renowned physician, author, and speaker who has extensively researched the connection between stress and chronic illnesses. In his work, he argues that unresolved emotional stress and trauma can have a profound impact on our physical health, leading to the development of chronic diseases such as autoimmune disorders, cancer, and mental health conditions.
According to Dr. Maté, stress and trauma can create a state of chronic inflammation in the body, which can weaken the immune system and make us more vulnerable to illness. This can be especially true for individuals who have experienced early childhood trauma or ongoing stressors such as poverty, discrimination, or violence.
To address these issues, Dr. Maté emphasizes the importance of addressing the underlying emotional and psychological factors that contribute to chronic illness. This may involve working with a therapist, practicing mindfulness and self-care, and making lifestyle changes that support overall health and well-being.
In summary, Dr. Gabor Maté's work highlights the complex relationship between stress, trauma, and chronic illness, and emphasizes the need for a holistic approach to health that takes into account both the physical and emotional aspects of our well-being.
The power of words to control our emotions can be therapeutic to our mental health;
✅ “I'm here for you.”
✅ “You are not alone.”
✅ “You are worthy and deserving.”
✅ “You don't have to apologize.”
✅ “There is treatment available to you…”
✅ “You are strong!.”
I suffer from bipolar disorder. There are times that I experienced cyclical remission through music and motivational inspirational speech I was able to survive every stage of my cyclical depression. Inside Serene is my alter ego - my trusted friend a gatekeeper of my pandora's box of mindfulness that helps me overcome mental struggles.
" We must be willing to encounter darkness and despair when they come up and face them, over and over again if need be, without running away or numbing ourselves in the thousands of ways we conjure up to avoid the unavoidable". - By Jon Kabat-Zinn
✅ Be empowered ✅ Be intentional ✅ Be in control
Credit to: drgabormate.com/
and Credit to the original video to: • When the Body Says No ...
Copyright Disclaimer:
Copyright Disclaimer under Section 107 of the copyright act 1976, allowance is made for fair use for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statutes that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational, or personal use tips the balance in favour of fair use.

[@hartmanartsource]

My sister sent this to me because she knows that in our family, expectations were high, and non-compliance was punished. We both experienced sexual abuses from non-family members, and simply complied and blamed ourselves. We are now supporting one another and realizing what a generational curse this has been. We are determined to overcome our pasts, and to triumph, even in the autumn of our lives.

[@insideserene]

Be strong I know its easy to say than done I know you will get there a place where nobody is allowed to hurt you again ❤

[@ramip8816]

Big hugs to you both!❤️❤️❤️

[@DS-nv8bi]

nice

[@robynology101]

You’re very blessed to have each other.

[@jota55581]

I AM a great believer in teaching kids meditatiion from very early age and making it part of school currículum.People who are in control Will be so harder to manipulate.

[@carrierachel9041]

I heard a therapist say once that before he diagnosed someone with depression he made sure the patient wasn’t surrounded by assholes. This lecture reminded me of this basic lost wisdom.

[@ranima3408]

😂❤

[@i.d.8837]

Interesting because when my husband behaves like an asshole I hold up my bottle of antidepressants and say "it's because of people like you that I have to take this!".

[@Morgan313]

Situational depression is a thing

[@stephaniekolsut5478]

Thank you. I am going to do just that.

[@kristinmeyer489]

​@@Morgan313Yes, it is. Hugs from someone who also knows from experience. Sorry for your pain, hope you're in a MUCH better place.

[@Iquey]

The woman who died early at 55 and was always nice/never got angry with anyone (or at least never showed it) is why I CRINGE when people say stupid platitudes like, "it costs nothing to be nice." *Oh Yes It Does Cost. We just expect people to bear those costs instead of standing up for themselves!!!!!!!!!!!*

[@thedancingdivaofdaviestree2320]

Well said.

[@punyashloka4946]

So true , myself is struggling with this. Suffering from Cptsd train to appease everyone, life is a hell, struggling with depression 😞 pain, physiologically damaged etc . Hope I can heal.

[@user-hu4rp2tl2p]

i agree

[@reneeoleari]

I spent some time at cancer chemo ward (no was NOT a patient). Was shocked at how kind and peaceful all of the (women) patients were. I figured out then - that being a little ornery is NOT a bad thing (though have been punished and attacked (all my life) for having that trait). Was also raised in new age "prosperity" religion where we were forced to "smile" and "be friendly" for some kind of spiritual reasons. I'm grateful I saw through that from the get go.

[@wallybingbang4350]

@@punyashloka4946 ❤

[@jturtle5318]

My primary doctor kept telling me about my high cortisol levels, which is a direct indicator of stress. He also was my abusive husband's doctor, so he knew where it came from. Finally he said "you can leave, or stay with him and die, and there's nothing I can do to fix that." Then the specialist that I see for a chronic life-threatening condition said the same thing, without ever meeting him. By then all four parents had died, so he could no longer use threats against them as a way to keep me from leaving. Right after these conversations, my elderly cat died. I knew that I had to move out, despite being the one paying the mortgage, and I knew he wouldn't feed or medicate the cat if I couldn't take him with me. The day I buried the cat, I started sorting donations and packing for storage. Freedom is amazing.

[@aannwwsalam]

Proud of you ❤

[@Verawnique]

Bravo to you!!!

[@hogotusaal]

Was the abuse emotional or physical if you don't mind me asking?

[@Verawnique]

Good for you....

[@jturtle5318]

@@hogotusaal he only hit me once, I tried to do a police report but the officer was like "that's not a bruise, it's a red mark" and told me to go somewhere else. He screamed a lot, pounded on things like a gorilla, threw things, broke his cane pounding it on the stairs, etc. He liked to pound his fist into his hand while screaming right in my face. He was a big guy and carried 100 lb boxes for work, but the threats to my family were the deciding factor.

[@ChristineLouisJacques]

46:50 " Stress is not just what happens to us. It's how we process it" -- such a gem to remember

[@trandom2083]

I had to keep pausing to reflect on all the gems lol

[@Saturn57]

This is also the definition of trauma. It's how we feel and process events, or how we weren't allowed to feel and process and had to suppress it. That's why it's stupid to tell people "let it go. It wasnt a big deal".

[@lamagiduneinstant76]

~It doesn’t matter what happens in our lives -it’s How we Deal with it.😉🙏🏽☮️

[@pamelaferree2318]

My daughter seems to have become addicted to being a victim then be saved. She hangs on to her perceived trauma and lets it dictate her capabilities and self-worth. Every time she needs saving, usually financially, she'd yell at me about hiw horrible her father was, because he did no how to connect and his words could be harsh. One time, he stooped to her level if anger she had at twelve and grabbed her hard and shoved her UP staires to her bed room. He typically had a short temper and didn't know how to deal with her teenage angst. She has hung on to that to this day and continues to make choices that put her in a position to be saved. She's a loving, kind soul (people pleaser) trauma response. I set boundaries and refuse to listen to her cry day in and day out about her situation. This behavior has put her through 28 jobs from age 15 to 36. She's lost all her friends, destroyed 1st relationship with her first child's father. 14 years later, on a lustful whim got pregnant again. Pushed him away (he is wonderful and won't leave) She let him back in her life realizing she can't do parenting alone and then gor pregnant AGAIN, with no money, no stable relationship and blames her dad, AGAIN, and when I set the boundaries, She's feeling abandoned. She refuses all guidance from me her dad and when she goes to therapy she only talks about her past and how to deal with it. Never thought it would be a good idea to take steps to manage life as a thriving adult. She hates when I point out signs of things she may need to work on like why she has destroyed every friendship, intimate relationship and family relationship She's ever gad because it's always everyone else's fault. For 17 years.

[@StephanieGrantham]

⁠abusive treatment by many throughout your life can destroy your self esteem to the point of severe depression. People can be so paralyzed.that they just can’t deal with their life at all. I like the psychiatrist that asks who the AH are in an individuals before any other questions.

[@amom2go101]

"If you don't know how to say NO, your body will say it for you in the form of illness" This is something I have been observing in my family/ extended family members and have seen it in my own life. It is so true.

[@Myheartofthematter]

I like to people watch and notice increasingly how stiff everyone is even the young ones seem so rigid. I think emotional suppression is getting worse as this as the cause is being overlooked or ignored in the mainstream institutions.

[@shrunkensimon]

@@Myheartofthematter It is being cau se d by those in stitut ions. All over the world, we are bei ng gu ide d towards a to talit arian end point that has no tol eran ce for individ uali ty beyond what the sy stem dee ms perm issible. I had to break up that statement to avoid yo u tub es cens or ship al go rithm!! That says it all.

[@CrabbyPattydelight]

So true and a lot of the damaging things like alcohol can keep you stuck because ironically the thing that is poisoning you is also numbing your anxiety/stress, but it's just taking another chop at the tree in the big scheme of things, prevention is key, longer you put off action the worse the Inflammation gets which can invite mutations not a Beck album lol

[@dawiser1]

Yep, that one hit me hard. Been taking on a lot of work, never saying no, and have started to see detriments to my health and youthfulness over the past 5 years. Think it’s time to start saying no!

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

​@@dawiser1Yes that's me too. Being a carer to my mother AND being on the autistic spectrum is hell. I used to look after myself very well, but now I just feel trapped and am over eating, undersleeping, taking care of ALL household maintenance, her finances, liaison with health professionals, as well as cooking, cleaning and everything. I feel so depressed, unsupported and suicidal at times, as well as looking like s--t these days.

[@Lucoms]

“You are more important than your attachments” hit me pretty hard.

[@Sisiana311]

Same here, that's my new motto from now on 😍 I' ve never heard that before and it's soooo true! Dr. Gabor is golden! ❤️

[@buyyourownfreedom]

This explains why the good die young and the mean people seem to live forever.

[@hopeful6157]

💯

[@tuvoca825]

I know some nice people that lived a long time.

[@dirface]

Not really, as mean people are acting out, and that was not a good way to deal with stress, as said in the video. It's also more likely to be stressful to be mean than being 'good', which also isn't good for health.

[@beigepiano-du5dk]

no. this isn't supposed to mean just become a bad person and live forever. respect others AND respect yourself

[@debrallewis]

Maybe, but it’s not a stereotypical response. He seems to highlight how cultural norms unquestioned cause the early deaths. I’m glad he does as it’s another encouragement to me to speak up in love and compassion to myself and to others against the tide.

[@7aira81]

My husband was a physician and he died from cancer he worked till the last minute. He was selfless and very caring and committed. I miss him so much😢

[@melodydix4425]

Suppressing our emotions is the equivalent of blocking our own life force. Thank you 🌼

[@ruthbentley2090]

Our bodies are designed to let emotion be expressed and pass through the body. It’s not meant to “store” unexpressed emotion

[@Dani-ICU-RN]

Yep I feel like it's a damn holding back all the water and then once there's a tiny little leak in the dam or it breaks there's overwhelming destruction that could have been avoided if every now and then just a little bit of water could leak through that down instead of a tragic breaking down of the entire wall😊

[@SandyMay61]

I feel that!!

[@monakeulen5622]

BUT always expressing everything also isn't good & increases the risk on heart disease and strokes. Always everything in moderation!

[@susanwilson1230]

Trained to stuff every emotion from infancy. Was mentally and emotionally abused by my mother and later, my husband making with physical abuse. Stress is what made me sick. Psoriatic arthritis for me. 18 years of it.

[@MamallamaLinda]

Just came across this video while scrolling before bedtime, and this may very well be my life-saving grace. I've been suffering with near stroke levels of hypertension for years. On and off meds, doctors can't find root cause (organs are healthy and normal). I have always, as far back as I can remember, internalized my emotions. I have repressed everything from sadness and loneliness to depression and anger. It's time to let it go. It's time to live again.

[@jessicacoker7460]

You can do this

[@AMStephens7]

This is beautiful, and may healing be profound for us all ♡

[@rawanyassin5386]

I appreciate this alot i have passed along a similar journey and i have let go the anger and the flame of hating people hurted me. I learned to put my boundries and live loving each second in my life with peacefullness❤❤❤❤

[@gracegwozdz8185]

Sorry for your illness, but I you stop taking stimulants like fully caffeinated coffee, black tea, chocolate and Coca Cola - you cannot stop high blood pressure from becoming "chronic and drug resistant". Adding 4 celery stalks to your daily crunch will regulate your BP.

[@GreensnGuitars]

Can relate

[@mellD.7988]

I am so proud of myself for finally learning to say no, for prioritising myself, for pushing back negative people and most importantly, for keeping them there. What cancer didn't teach me, my 8yo niece did -- "Why didn't you answer my call," I asked her. "I didn't feel like," she said as if it was most natural thing in the world. I was so happy she's better than me at taking care of herself, and equally happy I finally got it! All my life I had accepted rubbish from everyone, just to not hurt their feelings. And of course, I was always answering their calls.

[@gillb9222]

Well done. You should be so proud of that, its really hard to do. I wish a happy, wonderful life going forward with love for yourself xx

[@mariannedarwin6377]

I too have kept everyone happy! Finally saying No!

[@jrb6519]

❤❤❤❤

[@lvhimabindu]

"But she knows that if she wants to stay alive, she needs to stay authentic." -- so simple yet so powerful! 🙏 thank you Dr. Gabor for this insightful talk.

[@Sara-cl4ql]

What time is time?

[@brandy4530]

Yep, I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at 21 years old. I remember asking my doctor if this was caused by stress, and he immediately said, “No, we don’t know why you have this.” I knew why I got it. I was raised by a mother with schizophrenia, and part of a high control religion and family. I was basically raised in a pressure cooker, and expected to not only be perfect, but to fix my mother. One day my body broke, at a very young age. I stayed sick for years, because I was expected to meet expectations no matter how many times I ended up hospitalized with my colitis. I didn’t go into long term remission until I finally got into a position where I was able to tell everyone to go to hell, and fix their own problems. I still have issues with stress, and not being able to handle a lot of stuff. I still sometimes feel like I am supposed to take on a lot of responsibility for other people, without complaint. It’s very hard for me to accept that other people think I am a terrible person, because I have chosen to walk away from situations that I cannot fix, but for some reason I’m expected to kill myself trying.

[@insideserene]

Please look after yourself first before others I know its easier to say but now that you know the culprit be strong- take care my friend ❤

[@bandit2048]

I totally understand - I have experienced similar problems and the ill health it sets up for you can last all your life. Finally at 71 I'm trying to do something about it, admit the problems and history but it doesn't heal me - not yet anyway. Being able to look at it objectively is a help though.

[@portal432]

Raised a JW?

[@CuriousHumbleMarie]

Brandy it must have been so freaking terrifying and hard being raised by a parent who had a serious mental health issue such as schizophrenia…I’m so sorry. I’m sure it’s still difficult and hope you now realize that you can’t fix your mother or her problems. I’ve learned the hard way that it’s sometimes best to only love a parent or siblings from afar if they are harmful to your life. It’s best for your own peace of mind, happiness, and good health to exclude everyone from your life that is toxic, doesn’t respect you, bring you joy, or simply doesn’t care about your wellbeing. Humans are complicated and we aren’t trained to fix the core issues and pathologies of people that causes their problems… heck it’s hard enough to fix our own problems even with good therapy. I lost so much trying to cater to the needs of others. I’ve wasted so much time and energy trying to make people have an understanding of another point of view who I now know were incapable of having one…it’s just impossible. I’ve only hurt myself trying to help and please others that were only capable of constantly taking. And sometimes the hard truth is that we’re too broken ourselves to be able to help others in the right way. Only recently have I’ve learn to love and be kind to myself to live a more authentic and fulfilling life…it’s a daily practice. I’ve learned to have only relationships in my life that give me love, joy, or respect. I’ve recently learned to include creativity to bring me peace and wellbeing in my life. Therapy has been extremely helpful. My spirituality (non religious) and humanism growth has been crucial. I’m now able to be present in daily life to greet others with smiles, compassion, and kindness. I pray Brandy that you gain a curiosity about the beautiful things in this wonderful world to learn how to live a joyous and fulfilling life (and unlearn negative beliefs and things that were earlier taught to us)…listening to Dr. Gabor is a good start! I wish you all the best dear Brandy…many blessings to you. 💙

[@Eze8102]

You sound exactly like me. I had an abusive step dad and watched my mother being verbally abused on a daily basis and didn’t have the character or confidence to stand up for her or myself. I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at 17 and almost lost my bowel at 20. That was rock bottom after which I turned my life around through a journey of self improvement across all aspects of my life. Lots of wisdom to be gained from these types of illnesses and wouldn’t change a thing having been in remission for over 10 years now. Keep going with your journey you sound very conscious of the areas of the life you wish to improve.

[@urwaimran1487]

I remember praying to God today and asking for clear answers, asking how this painful life that I’m trapped in could be transformed. And this video shows up, and it plays, and I have my answers, answers that make sense that give me a direction

[@theskyizblue2day431]

For my own reminder and anyone else of this glorious moment 37:06 “We’re still behaving like little kids who need to attach, who need to be liked, who need to be accepted and approved of at the expense of our authenticity”

[@venanziocalise946]

WTHeck are you talking about?

[@shadowfax9177]

​@@venanziocalise946what part of that comment are you having difficulty understanding?

[@jenniferlloyd9574]

​@@venanziocalise946 OP is quoting a profound statement made by the doctor in this video. It's self-explanatory. The quote is referencing people who deny their own feelings and expressions or suppress their needs in order to be accepted (liked) by others. An example would be not expressing how you _really_ feel in order to keep from offending someone.

[@Mary-xd8zp]

When the student is ready the teacher will appear....thank you Dr Gabor 😊

[@endlesspossibilityes]

Is this Daniel Quinn? Ishmael??

[@Mary-xd8zp]

@@endlesspossibilityes l hadn't heard of Daniel Quinn or his book until your reply. Will definitely look into him. Thanks for that info. My reading tends to be more metaphysical then philosophy....

[@AvicSubfusca]

You're all here, like me, no doubt, because you've been through some shit! I hope it gets better; I hope we all one day find the peace we deserve. 🙏🏻

[@insideserene]

yes same aspiration peace be with you my friend ❤

[@sunnyflower1979]

I wish that too

[@deez3063]

bless you sir

[@MsBerries25]

❤️

[@joycer6250]

Ask Jesus Christ to take you under His wing. He is the only real peace in this life and the next. 🧡

[@kathleenwharton2139]

Jesus Said it Beautifully! “Say Yes when you mean Yes and Say No when you mean No.” 😊❤

[@LifeIsBetterWithLove]

When did he say that?

[@kathleenwharton2139]

@@LifeIsBetterWithLove Sermon on the Mount..Matthew 5:37..The Living Bible

[@AbuseFree23]

You said the best answer ever. YES!

[@ohgawd]

Too bad he didn't tell a baby born into a Christian cult based on a traumatized person's perception of his work, how to AVOID the programming of twisted beliefs into it's being. 😢

[@ohgawd]

​@@AbuseFree23oh really? You're able to do this just because he told you to, huh? THIS - I'D LOVE TO SEE! 😂😂😂😂😂 Umm... I'm pretty sure Jesus telling you to say no instead of yes when you actually mean NO - is the reason for all the guilt and shame that's built up inside of you, creating that cancer you'll be facing in a few years. NO: just having your idol TELL you to do it is NOT the best way to look at your own behavior. That's a recipe for an ulcer in the lining of your gut that burns and churns until you face the fact that you're living for someone else's truth instead of yourself.

[@Sbannmarie]

My God! Gabor, I said these for decades- my father (cancer) and brother (sucide) died from unexpressed anger.

[@RitaP41]

"You are more important than your attachments. That wasn't true when you were a kid, but it's true as an adult." - Gabor Mate

[@tnt01]

love this.

[@haeskenhoff]

🎯✨

[@Monayla]

[@adriennepalmer2701]

That part!

[@lanacrystal8147]

Thank you ❤

[@elisabethhallstein8644]

Exactly what my mom did, take care of everyone but herself. Stayed with my toxic father and put up with his mental abuse. When she got cancer and had a chemo port put into her head she still went to work the next day. When I told her she should stop working she seemed shocked to get someone's permission to stop working herself to death 😔 she beat cancer 2x before but couldn't beat it when it was in her brain. I still miss her everyday

[@GrayWithMe]

Sorry for your loss. It’s so hard to break away from toxic relationships

[@Junefp]

Sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace

[@insideserene]

May she rest in peace 🙏

[@sunnyflower1979]

🥺 sorry for your loss 😞

[@nancyinthegarden3160]

that’s so terrible that you had to watch your Mother be abused and i’ll bc of the ? I don’t know how to sun it up but it certainly made its mark on both of you. I’m very sorry for you and your Mom. I pray God sends you a person to bond with to be someone you can have fun with bc it sounds like you suffered

[@PositiveL]

Everything starts in the mind and manifests in the body. Dr. Gabor is a gem

[@bernadettemccarthyflahive5357]

I think it’s a reflexive relationship…it can go both ways. After all, viruses can cause autoimmune illness as well as serious illnesses such as covid.

[@brigittegeorg]

@PositiveL I disagree. Everything starts with the body, you feel it first, then think.

[@PositiveL]

Nawww.... everybody body is different. If you think about it long enough you will see it appears. Your mind and subconscious is very powerful...you can think and heal or think and get sick

[@GossFam559]

Not entirely true. Babies are born with cancer etc. I guess you could blame that on the mothers thoughts but I don’t agree. I do believe there is a relationship with our body mind. But it’s not 100% the reason for illness.

[@PositiveL]

@@GossFam559 of course... Genetics everything is frequency. Do you believe that the unborn child hears the mother's thoughts words and can feel Mama's intentions. There was a study done that showed this. Do you ever wonder why some people are lacking in consciousness and why some people are not? So consider a mother that is suffering from chronic depression what do you think will be the outcome of the baby. Our thoughts are powerful Everything begins in the mind

[@SueLangford-pz6ue]

OMGoodness. Your talks have been mind blowing for me. Nursing career 45 years, recently retired due to shifts sometimes adding up to 17hrs in emergency recovery post op. Working my way through Psoriasis whole body, previous infiltrating breast cancer and diag. 2008/ chemotherapy. This year year I’ve discovered I am deficient in Vitamin D and with much work I’ve discovered through these videos how I can cure an auto immune disease without trad. Medication ie. methotrexate/ cortisone. Life is great. Releasing my whole married relationship has been my main stressor, nursing career same, 3 children elderly mum and 6 grandchildren. I now am practicing saying No! 😁😁😁🌿🦋🙏🏼🌻

[@dlewis895]

LISTEN TO STRONGLY TO YOURSELF AND EA WORD YOUVE JUST SHARED THE LIFE YOU SAVE MAY BE YOUR OWN

[@Manaviecreations]

“if you don’t know how to say no, the body will say it with illness” ❤❤❤🎉🎉

[@edensmith552]

So true

[@Stacey0909]

Best quote Truth 💣

[@gustavopelayo9596]

That's good!!

[@manvisharma-ip8uj]

Couldn't hear this lecture without crying, because finally someone gave me a reason why I am the way I am.

[@morganniciomhair8284]

And you are loved

[@davebellamy4867]

Yes this is likely the most significant KZbin video or television programme I've ever seen and Im just eleven minutes in.

[@br8979]

I feel you! It's a relief to know that there are good reasons for how we are and that there are people out there who get it and understand.

[@br8979]

I feel you! It's a relief to know that there are good reasons for how we are and that there are people out there who get it and understand.

[@eggbenedict-gt7mw]

Didn't ur mom dad love u

[@farrenrohana]

I have been alone for the last 20 years because I refused to allow my family to put all the blame on me anymore. They are all sick. I am too because I believed them when they said I was a horrible person BUT I am working on healing myself where they are not.

[@alixhoward592]

I feel like that too, lots of love 🤗

[@Fkr523]

My aunt was an angel. She was taking care of everyone in our family. She has never said NO. She died 3 years ago for cancer suffering so badly. I still can’t accept it 😢

[@jenniferlloyd9574]

My mother was a housewife; my dad was in the military for 20 years and civil service another 20 years. His job was very stressful. He supported us all financially while being very dependable and reliable. He bought his mother a house near us and looked after her, as well. His first job at age twelve was setting up bowling pins during the depression. Fortunately, he was able to retire early at age fifty-eight. A few years later, he passed from cancer.😢 I love you, Dad.❤

[@suzanneh4275]

If you cant accept it, I think it is safe to say that it makes you angry. But remember that anger is then throughout your body and in every cell. Now, ask yourself, Is that what you want for yourself, for your entire body? She did what she did. She had free will. She did what she thought (or was taught) was the right thing to do, being a nice person. We all have our reasons, we all have choices, and so do you in how you process and understand your aunt.As sad as you are that she suffered, and as much as I am sure you miss her very much, Dr. Gabor’s message came to you now and from this you can better understand (especially because of your aunt) how important authenticity is.

[@MagicPrincessGigi]

Finally a therapist who believes in a mind-body, brain-heart connection. My family doctor has a long way to go. Hopefully we'll all get there one day.

[@carolinecarmack6497]

Where! I’d love to find one online that’s affordable. They’re always ridiculously expensive

[@annwilliams6438]

He isn’t a trained therapist- he is a GP of many decades who has seen this over and over again, looked at the research and then formulated a therapy methodology to help people maintain better health. There is hope for our GPs yet. :)

[@claudiaskorniewska184]

They’ll never teach doctors this. There’s no money in curing people

[@pepitoclavo1clavito610]

Uhmmm Dr. Sarno?....

[@emmasprout]

German new medicine is worth looking into too!

[@sadiaarman363]

Stress is not just what happens to us, but how you process it.

[@robynhope219]

Epigenetic

[@cca3422]

Mathew 11:28-30

[@lynnebucher6537]

My best friend seems to feel she has to make everyone happy all the time. I have learned that I can't just vent to her about something that is bothering me, because she'll try to personally fix it and that wasn't what I was venting to her for! This has opened my eyes to observing her trying to fix everyone's life challenges, at the expense of her own well being.

[@Persephonejackson]

Perhaps you could say next time before you vent; “I really need to vent to someone just to feel heard, not to fix anything, do you have space for that right now?” I’m like your friend and I would have appreciated that communication in the past because the fixing is unconscious. You’re a good friend though!

[@eliara-thevoice8430]

It's called "fixer/pleaser." Often fixer/pleaser personalities are a stress response. She probably learned this behavior at a very young age.

[@JeliLala]

Have you thought about stopping venting?

[@dawnolynyk]

Thank you so much for this talk Doc. Retired over 7 years ago. Gave 110% at my job. Loved my work, but it has taken its toll. Now that i am away from this environment, i live a quiet life with husband and my loyal pets. The elderly i cared for have all passed on. Everyday is lived for my little family. Our health and happiness is a priority. Enjoying the sounds of nature and the pristine view is a daily prescription around here. It is a tricky balance at times, as watching the news is such a downer. My heart goes out to those less fortunate, and wish peace to others. Thank you for helping so many to understand their health concerns.

[@LoveandSoul7]

I'm so happy you found peace and healing...much love to you 💞💞

[@thiaco6203]

I don’t watch the news for that exact reason. I just check headlines so I know what’s going on without all the graphic video details.

[@kasko8550]

I simple don't watch the news.

[@myggggeneration]

The mainstream news is toxic and a for-profit business, not information. Stopped watching over 10 years ago.

[@julielee6144]

I hear you.l have started to either limit the news l expose myself to or avoid it all together.Becoming mindful of what l expose myself to has led me to becoming aware of just how persistently depressing and negative the news really is...look after yourself ❣

[@AnnaAparicio]

I had debilitating asthma and allergies in my childhood. I was put on ventolin, given corticoid injections... you name it. I was bloated like a balloon. Nothing worked, I left my parents´ home at 19. Within a few years, my asthma "magically" disappeared. As an adult, I was finally aloowed to make my own decisions. I adopted a diet that felt good to me, a type of exercise that felt good to me... slowly, as I became me, the things that were not me left.

[@GoldChocobo77]

Summary: 1) people who never say no, or don't want to ask for help, or sacrifice their own wellness for others, or work all the time despite their illness out of their sense of duty, are more likely to get sick (and die young). The body say no when the mind doesn't. 2) The mind and body are connected, and if you supress your anger by never expressing it, you also suppress your immune system.

[@scotttyoshimura]

thank you

[@ephajanke3242]

"people who never say no, (...) or sacrifice their own wellness for others" I disagree. They do it for themselfes, to get acceptance, love, physical and emotional seciurity etc. This is what they needed when they were children, but unfortunatly did not get. So they developed this pleasing coping mechanism to survive and never got out of it. If people don´t understand that they can not heal. And it´s not healthy for the recieving end of this behaviour either. There are not only selfish people who take advantage of this behaviour. There are children, spouses, friends who suffer as well because its not about them, there is no real connection, you never know what they really feel, think and want.

[@maka1706]

Highly appreciated

[@silotx]

How do you reset though? I guess that it's answered in the book. It's not easy to just stop suppressing after so many years since it happens subconsciously.

[@auntyjo1792]

@@silotx I'm looking for some practical processes too!

[@marieperez3796]

And yes I was so depressed. I did not want to continue leaving. But I’m in a better place now . Thanks to the God Almighty .

[@energeticrebel]

For anyone suffering with dysregulated nervous systems, try somatic exercises to release trauma from your body.

[@Stopit77]

This man is brilliant. Doctors need to have courses in this in their training.

[@sjors7750]

Most of them don't, they will give the patient medicine ;) Look how doctors work for example in Japan. Totally the other way the Western Society doctors. They will connect you with healty food and mind fullness first.

[@kayhathaway6956]

Well, I’ve been married to an ER doc for 38 years. Because of the constant threats of lawsuits, in America, the average physician would never have time or desire to heal patients this way. That’s why I am my own health advocate. I learn everything that I can and I’ll see my primary care physician for any reason that concerns me.

[@GabrielBacon]

He literally thinks all science takes is his emotional intuitions. He’s wrong about most specific diseases he talks about. Watch the leading ADHD expert, Russell Berkley pick apart Gabor’s ideas about that condition. All he does is profess. Emotional health is important but he seems to think it’s a magical force that causes all disease, and that’s just not true.

[@mightyatom1404]

💯🙏❤️🇬🇧

[@leejay2418]

As someone in the caring industries and from a dysfunctional family and someone with two auto immune conditions, this is what I've needed to hear for some time. Thank you.

[@leejay2418]

@@lesleyt8984 Yes, I'm on this diet. I'm making lots of small changes and I'm really happy with the results. Thanks.

[@annmarieknapp2480]

​@Sincitylv Can you put link to video you recommended? I'd be grateful. Now I feel relief that I did vent some of my anger last week when trapped in airports after insane delays, cancelations, and poor treatment by the administration at airport. I had felt guilty for losing it and tearing up over the stressors that made my life so hard and were so costly. It's okay to release some emotion. Now, I feel better and less ashamed that I couldn't be completely calm, cool, and collected to multiple stressors that just pushed me to the brink in other ways.

[@michaelmcdonnell4128]

@Lesley T Hello Lesley, I’m very sorry to hear the suffering and resulting health issues you currently suffer from. I say currently because I’m hopeful with self care and social support of some sort ( family, friends, etc.), doctors, therapist, hope where you can find it will allow you to heal. What type of diet do you follow?

[@krystle8287]

Praying for your healing.. being in toxic environments & being on high alert is so hard on our bodies. Some people can’t comprehend the damage they cause bc they can’t physically see it but it doesn’t mean it isn’t present. Emotional ignorance at best. Take care of yourself. ❤

[@LisaRobinson-lt9jk]

@@annmarieknapp2480 Love yourself and release the daily frustrations appropriately as it sounds you did so well, it's a process which never ends, it only gets a bit easier ad you learn coping skills that work for you. You did a great job airports can really suck, so got for you for not lashing out but releasing the crap to move on. Hope your travels went well otherwise

[@sharon8927]

I'd love for you to do a speech on how life with a narcissist breaks down the partners body as well as the mind. Most people can speak about psychology but not the physiological breakdown.

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

The gas lighting, cognitive dissonance, intermittent reinforcement is horrible

[@KatWoodland]

@sharon8927 Survivors know. Most of us go through depression and grief and eventually enter into a numb like state (the constant intense daily stress is gone), before healing slowly on the daily. We go into a healing period which can last several years. Just as we experienced “death by one thousand cuts” at the hands of the narcissist, we experience healing through one thousand affirmations within our own hearts and minds. Our brains can relax finally, as the fight/flight/freeze/fawn is no longer on automatic. We have ourselves, finally, unabridged. We are no longer edited by the the narcissist. Fortunately for most abuse survivors, we have the very thing most narcissists will never have: self love. We have that love because we have love for our Creator. The narcissist does not. So we also become super strong with our spirituality. In the wake of surviving narcissistic abuse we have connected to a Higher power and are thusly never dependent on anyone for love. Alone. Not lonely. Repairing the very real damage done, like mending a porcelain bowl with gold.

[@ginag2375]

Absolutely, I second this request! After enduring emotional abuse from marrying into a narcissistic family system four years ago, I have absolutely started having health issues.

[@KatWoodland]

@@ginag2375There’s still time to get out of that system. Do it

[@nanhand99]

Yes, I ended up with fibromyalgia, bilateral carpal tunnel, migraines, endometrial cancer, degenerative disc disease, prediabetes, hypothyroidism Had asthma for 6 months I'm free now and still healing thank God 💕

[@Sbannmarie]

You, sir, are a Godsent. My dad died never expressing anger even though his dad was an alcoholic. Strongest word he’d say was ‘Blasted!' His body was needing him to 'get ugly.'

[@aprilrooksmusic]

Things that help with stress for those commenting seeking answers: Decrease your stress through walking Meditation and breathing Learning to let go Self improvement and healing education Counseling MUSIC Yoga Acupuncture Adequate sleep Forgiving those have hurt you Saying no to things you can’t do Learn to say yes to you Live In gratitude. Maybe start a daily gratitude journal. Slow down!

[@insideserene]

I completely agree!! 👍

[@tsnyder6668]

Essentrics.

[@tsnyder6668]

Miranda Esmonde-White is an angel sent to Earth.

[@tamastapf9117]

Thanks April! So helpful

[@LightFigure888]

Yes! ❤

[@Dave183]

I suffer from C-PTSD, contracted during childhood. I have suffered from 3 auto-immune conditions over my life. I was always desperate to life, and to have a good life. Dealing with my breathing habits through a skilled Physiotherapist proved to be a game changer for me. This took away my suicidal thoughts. I have also gone to weekly self-help groups for 40 years- kept my nose above water. I ought to be angry that i came across these initiatives so late in life- but I had learned not to get angry over things i just could not change. A great asset! I still have my moments- but my life now is liveable, and sometimes enjoyable. I have a good family life, having broken some of the family traits and "curses". Thanks so much for reading me.

[@irmakalkan]

Which breathwork exercises worked for you?

[@Dave183]

@@irmakalkan The idea was to get the diaphragm functioning as it should. It all begins with nose breathing. It took months to move away from habits of a lifetime.

[@mareavoce1272]

Sadly that’s how GP’s work in NZ - 3 weeks wait to see a Dr, 15 mins consult, pills & off you go, none the wiser. I’ve realised responsibility for my health lies with me, to research and work out my own health plan. Talks like these are so valuable.

[@graytoby1]

How old are you if I can ask? I'm glad I realised this at such a young age. The medical apparatus and industry is not designed to cure or help you it's designed to keep you sick and on repeat subscriptions. There's so much more valuable information avaliable online once you learn to wade through the BS

[@The_Absent_MindsetReality]

I keep trying to tell my bf about this and I think he thinks I’m full of it. In my gut I know health of the body is related to the mental-emotional states, and fixing those issues before they become medical issues. Internal work is critical. It’s good to see others bringing this into the world of medical/psychological careers. Everyone has to understand that there is more to life than what has been dictated to them. It’s time for society to get a massive overhaul.

[@Sirie7206]

Chronic stress brought on my autoimmune disease 13 years ago. I had so much rage in me. I had no idea I was even bringing that on myself. Last September is when I really took hold of my life and health. I will never put others before myself ever again.

[@Johndoe-co3pw]

I can relate my anger started to make me feel unwell and effected other aspects of my life. Now I take time for myself and seperate myself from toxic people and my life feels a lot better now

[@liming9675]

"if she wants to be alive, she needs to be authentic". so powerful words for me.

[@TheChesireKat]

Dr Maté has explained exactly what i'm going through right now. even my therapist doesn't understand this well. it's been a revelation.

[@insideserene]

Look after yourself take care❤️

[@bobbowie5334]

Get a new therapist.

[@zofiaskokowska6816]

Our attitudes do matter.

[@thaboshikwambane5578]

So hard to believe that he doesn’t have a psychotherapy qualification. He definitely deserves an honour art one for his contributions

[@KJensenStudio]

Dr Mate is like an open window in a stuffy room. Thank you for this breeze!

[@janetcorbin2642]

SO TRUE, A BREATH OF FRESH AIR GOD BLESS HIM AND YOU ❤

[@insideserene]

Hes one of a kind Doctor who tackle an issue by uncovering the root cause because most us normally evaluate an action but not what transpired that action/behaviour

[@antalperge1007]

A Hungarian Genius 🇭🇺 💗

[@SukiEleuterio1]

I struggled with endometriosis and chronic pain. Also was diagnosed with PCOS. Came to find I had very high cortisol levels which was from prolonged periods of stress is childhood. I also had panic attacks and anxiety. It took me years to find new tools and techniques to find my zen and inner peace. So grateful for yoga and meditation and for coming back to my body and my breath.

[@bhagyashreechoudhary8638]

Thanks, going through anxiety myself. Would you like to share what is helping you deal with it?

[@SukiEleuterio1]

@@bhagyashreechoudhary8638 For me it's been mindfulness. Generally I had to make a complete lifestyle change. This included taking time for me to be still, write, create, relax. I also love yoga, meditation, and being more mindful and aware of what I eat. Lastly, I cut back on stimulants - coffee, sugar, etc because it would make me more anxious. Lastly, I got to the ROOT of my anxiety and where it was coming from. I went to counseling and I worked with a coach. I have a podcast on this too - Soul Guided with Sookton if you want to hear more.

[@Vmieee]

How is the endo now?

[@indolilyindomitablelily7306]

Thanks for sharing. I was diagnosed with endometriosis one year into a toxic relationship.

[@courtneyalva]

How are things for you now? I have been struggling with some health issues & after trying EVERYTHING, I am looking to stress.

[@rachellebogle3803]

“How am I going to emotional support my husband while I’m dealing with a potentially fatal illness” this made me pause and reflect so much.

[@LeonaHolisticCoach]

I can completely relate to what Dr Gabor has discussed. I have been living with Crohn's for over 15 years. I always tell myself and others that this disease has taught me the lesson of my life. It taught me that you cannot move forward without your body. It forced me to take care of my body before anyone else because without it I cannot help anyone else. It stopped me from being that selfless person and made me reset my priorities to put myself at the top of my list. As a spiritual person, I neglected my physical being. The disease told me you can neglect, but you cannot deny your physical existence if you want to exist spiritually. I still sometimes shift back to that selfless person when I feel physically well, but I switch back to my commitment as soon as I feel the merciless symptoms of the disease.

[@SGTSpliffer]

Relatable 👍

[@theoryofpersonality1420]

Crones is an autoimmune disease caused by stress. 🫂❤️💕

[@patof72clune51]

Rosary in front of Jesus helps

[@leanne123]

I also have Chrones. I hope you are on Remicade or some other bio drug that surpresses the disease. It has helped me a lot. Yes I am a victim of a selfish family and they expect me to do for them when they don't show any concern for me. They are actually quite horrible people. Setting boundaries and not interacting with them very much has been helpful for me. I'm sorry you have developed this condition because we certainly don't deserve these limitations on our health and happiness. I wish you the best life. 💖🙋🏼‍♀️

[@LeonaHolisticCoach]

Thanks, dear @leanne123 for your kind and supportive words. I was on Remicade for 4 years, before I discontinued it due to lack of insurance. I am not taking any medication for a year now. My situation is better than being on Prednisone and Azathioprine. Biologic treatment is still needed to put me into remission, but I am coping with symptoms. We do not need the stress of dealing with those who do not empathize and understand, even if they are family members. I also wish you a healthy, happy, and fulfilling life in which you achieve all your goals despite the challenges. 🤲💓

[@leftyjcw7173]

Wow. I’m 63. Suffering from anxiety disorders. Terrible physical effects. You have described my personality. I’m my own worst enemy. This is extremely informative talk. I shall adopt these ideas. Perhaps it isn’t too late. Thank you.

[@sylan4094]

I hope you know that it’s not your fault, you did the best you could in the conditions you were met with, and while that story runs deep, it isn’t you.

[@insideserene]

Anxiety disorder is a disease its not your fault just like people with kidney problem not their fault either so dont get confuse between personality and disease and yes not too late for everything keep your healing journey my friend♥

[@entitiessoul]

OP wtf was that dude. Yes it is, everything chronic is by birth. As we age we create the mutation which we all have.

[@couldbe8348]

Power on!

[@skysetblue9578]

All my life I had anxiety and adhd…keep forgetting after too…eat junk then tension headaches after a stomach bug and stress over this that make it worse and miss work etc. and missing work is looked down on etc etc. A lot of things are caused by what we eat.

[@marya6445]

This brings tears to my throat,, I use to pride in all the people I helped, and yet I couldn't cry..And yes, I was forced out of work via Disability... As you could have guessed I have fibromaylsia and other stress relating issues. Finally after eight years of fighting these diagnoses and trying to run a healing business, I have gone on Sabbatical and most probably permanent retirement. Only a week has passed and I have more energy and find myself laughing and feeling playful for the first time in decades.

[@annaak7849]

❤️❤️

[@keryllehrlich9010]

Yes. All so true. I was a cook. Lived with a narcissist.I was an aged care worker. I lived with a narcissist. I could not say no. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia/ thyroid condition. I cared for a drug addicted daughter. I had a friend who was a narcissist. I didn't say no. One day I said no, enough. I'm done. I now care for myself. A new found relief. Getting back to nature.

[@MNMMOMMA2]

20 minutes in, I'm literally in tears, I've been living this life for the past 15 years!

[@noelb7623]

And still you are, crying over this isn't the answer. Self awareness should free you, not make you feel guilty.

[@crabbyjimmy1]

I found Dr.Gabor fifteen years ago and I was glued to his intellectual brilliance.

[@sleepers123]

Just commit to giving up the people that hurt you. No more second chances and live peacefully by yourself. Thinking you need these people is a mistake. They aren't there for you so leave them behind. It's hard but not as hard as getting that slap in the face every time you do meet.

[@buddha8820]

i strongly agree with this.. its imp and yes, when we heal ourselves then only we can be of any help anyone around us.

[@jcszot]

Absolutely!

[@chantellucky4565]

I did exactly that to save my sanity and regain my inner peace!! I am on my way to physical and emotional healing each day!!! ‘Walk Away’ and leave the hurtful ‘people/situations’ behind to find a new life of my own that allows me to grow and to heal is what frees me!!! ❤

[@DS-nv8bi]

having been alone for the last 10 years is the hardest thing yet in my long PTSD life. hard

[@sp3357]

❤ Your Absolutely Right. I was a people pleaser all my life I felt that I had to look out for people and help them out including my mom but something click the year of 2020 I said no more I put a plan in motion and moved away from my friends and family that were damaging me I never looked back I don’t even call my family. And I’m so happy that I’m healing because I know the next step/ journey in my life is going to be amazing ❤.

[@Renee-Heal-The-Eagle]

I'm a nurse in a nursing home and this is hitting me hard core right now...😢😢😢

[@sacredaura2170]

Try to find an area of nursing that’s less stressful if you can. Blessings to you

[@Riderules73]

Also - thanks so so much for the work you are doing! I’m eternally grateful for the work the nurses are doing for my Mother who is in a carehome currently.

[@tuercacaso]

Much love to you. It's such a sad, sorry environment for all who are "inside"... the ones living there, and those like you, who care, and care for them, within a dysfunctional system. All respect and appreciation to you, and again... MUCH LOVE. Hugs and understanding for you. We do feel your pain.

[@Renee-Heal-The-Eagle]

@@tuercacaso Thank you🥰

[@rollandjoeseph]

Thank you for your work, you are appreciated more then you know😌

[@Padmeandkitty]

I had a weird response yesterday. A relative broke one of my boundaries. I literally ran out of the house! They think I'm a crazy person but it was like my feet said no for me. Watching this I'm kind of understanding it a little.

[@janetstauffer9138]

Yes!

[@vintagepeace1]

Right on! I would’ve ran with you

[@dharmadharma3960]

Been there!

[@JeliLala]

What a great response! ❤❤❤

[@gaston.]

My mother died relatively young at 76... her brother now 102 and sister close behind. She always put everyone else first... I need to be careful as I naturally gravitate to women that are similar, but must remind myself to encourage self care in a relationship.

[@calmdowngurl]

As a therapist this is Right on. Learning to own our emotions from childhood and relationships and healing our inner child. This is the key to wholeness. Authenticity and connection to self breeds healthy minds and hearts 💞anger can be a key flag of boundaries being crossed

[@spunkysparks1779]

My authentic self scares a lot of people.

[@SkreltNL]

​@@spunkysparks1779 other people not the problem, good excuse to procrastinate. You scared of you, first and foremost. But you probably wont hear it, especially not online in some shitty comment... Source, billions who came before. me included.

[@h1ghnezz]

Therapist..LLOL

[@ricebunnymoon4624]

I’m always so sensitive 😢😊

[@ingomeulendijks9045]

Healing the inner child.....this is anvery underrated force in ones mind...i am 51 and still struggling with some aspects of childhood

[@udirt]

Such a soothing voice, it feels like one recovers just from listening.

[@moretimethanmoney9572]

Yes, so much compassion

[@debbieb9829]

It amazes me how many people in the World are so disconnected from their bodies and are just not listening to their bodies in an intuitive way. Listening to your body is key, it knows what it needs if we just tune in and pay more loving attention to it ❤️✨💪

[@user-pn2jd1qz5j]

I was raised by a bitter, angry, and at times abusive single mother. Very high strung tense environment 24/7. Of course it carried over into adulthood and I'm now feeling like I'm becoming similar and I will never allow that to happen. Especially now that I have a 2½ year old daughter and a wife that deserves more. I've been watching this man's videos for a couple of days and with the help of REAL Dr's spreading knowledge such as this and not going to "Dr's" that are just throwing pharmaceuticals at everyone I will break this inherited chaos. Both of my older brothers have children they do not even acknowledge and the oldest is an A-hole to the kids he does have. That way towards his wife and everyone else. Just hateful, negative, and narcissistic just like our mom. I thought I was some to follow in those steps but now I'm finding the knowledge I'll need to break that chain. Thanks Doc! You give some of us hope

[@anndia.23]

This talk just saved me a lifetime of reading self help books and going to therapy. Thank you.

[@sharbux]

"By the time you were four, and you were 11, you had already learned that you were alone in the world." That hits hard. Thank you Gabor, for always bringing your insightful expertise.

[@81redddd]

I can definitely relate, I’ve been moving around since I was 12 and luckily I was able to get emancipated and get my own apartment at 16. I was stressed out my entire childhood so now I’m burnt out just from regular stressful situations.

[@annode]

Children are not alone in the world. Why they didn't tell what happened to them has nothing to do with feeling/being alone.

[@monikaagnello]

children rarely tell...why do you think that is?

[@annode]

@@monikaagnello If you were speaking to me, I would say I don't know. I only said it would not be because they are alone in the world.

[@marcelkuiper5474]

I am not alone, there is a space inside yourself where you can go and meet Yeshuah, and reside in his presence , the yogis call it "the great one self". It is achieved through meditation by disassociating from your thought, you are after all not your thoughts. You have to leave the world, the man-made system of control, you can still function in it, but don't BE IT. Don't attach to it, we do all the time, stop it, don't watch TV, don't read newspapers, only consume what you want to and need, otherwise you will be consumed and roam around from a to b and repeat, with the spark in your eyes long gone by all the self inflicted pain by letting yourself be abused by a system that produces nothing but depression, anxiety, and a whole lot of fear, they are like vampires, the unseen architects.

[@alicegharibjanians1449]

What an amazing human being Dr Gabor is! Right on spot. My Mom never said” no “to anyone. She cared about everyone and helped wherever she could. Four years after my Dad’s stroke, my Mother died at age 49 , from liver cancer, which is still a puzzle to all of us. Her Father survived the 1915 Armenian Genocide. I wish Dr Gabor did a video on generational traumas and how they are passed on. Take care

[@anthonywilliams5070]

Sadly, he doesn't do the spiritual side and past lives.

[@Persephonejackson]

In Chinese medicine, the liver holds our anger.

[@renaelynn6376]

This guy is GENIUS. I'm grateful I found it.

[@abenaoffeh-gyimah8265]

OMG!! I NEEDED THIS. The explanation of those with ALS spoke to me. I never miss work, I never take time off, I never say no, I never not show up, I'm constantly on the go, go, go. This woke me up. Thank you

[@insideserene]

Take it easy my friend ❤️

[@StarsManny]

Thumb down for all the creepy library footage.

[@maudyvictoria1598]

don’t forget this discovery

[@happyoutside2558]

@@insideserene this lecture was so important, so thoughtful and wise, why not just show it! Why insert those trite, stupid video clips from free internet? You turned something intensely beautiful into a cheap KZbin ad.

[@Virvepaulina]

I am learning this in my 30's. That I am more important than my attachments. I was on my way to illness for sure for sure, I'm learning to relax in life now... constant learning!

[@jessstirland8338]

Rest is the cure for stress

[@patriciatennent1493]

And peace.

[@Mekinhumbel]

I watch a *lot* of KZbin. I don't know exactly how I landed on this, but I'm glad I did--this is easily one of the most important things I've seen on this platform. A relationship gone bad last year led to therapy this year, and one of the major themes was about assertiveness--learning how to advocate for yourself and say no in a healthy way. A lot of insights from this about my tendencies and their implications--both at work and in my personal life. And about her life and how it turned out (the woman with whom I had the failed relationship). The entire "healthcare" industry in North America needs to go down this road and retool their approach if they're really serious about helping people, and not just lining the pockets of big pharma.

[@insideserene]

Sometimes we look for answer and somehow we magnetise the answer❤️

[@MalaneYoung]

This was really good and very timeline. Reaffirming the work I’ve done and will continue to do in my own life! There is a better way to live and Saying NO is a complete sentence and requires no explanation!💯👊🏽👍🏽 Peace, Joy & Abundance are my birthright‼️😊💯❤️🙌🏽🫶🏽

[@artisticagi]

5:20 compulsive concern for others 7:00 rather than the needs of self 7:50 suppression of anger 8:30 suppression leads to autoimmune and cancer Unhealthy Expression leads to heart attacks 13:17 he couldn’t say his two needs

[@leecourt8509]

Wow! Had a friend who fits this list. An extraordinary caring person but she got CFS in her twenties, cancer in thirties and then relapse in forties and unfortunately now passed. Knowing her well you could see the above personality traits / habits / behaviour were causing the illness. Her best friend tried to help our sick friend see the link but she was just wrapped up mentally in "issues". A deep lesson I have to remind myself of every now and then.

[@truthseeker4452]

Thanks

[@danarzechula3769]

Whoa I never hold back expressing myself and I have RA so what's my diagnosis now? Geez so now on top of whatever stress I have it's also my fault I'm sick. I call BS. Back off Mr.

[@sviii9918]

What to do if you are tired of this life in late 20s or early thirties? Whats the point?

[@hoofydoolittle]

There is a lot more to it than just about holding back, what about the rest of your life, what is your attachment style and how has that affected your life. Funny how you honed in on one aspect of the whole lecture.

[@davebellamy4867]

7:46 Dad had quite a quick temper. He was quick to get it off his chest. He lived to 94. My mom held things inside. She lived to 75 even though her own mother made it to 96.

[@edensmith552]

My mother never complained about anything, although I know her life wasn't easy. She kept everything that worried her inside. She had high blood pressure throughout her life, mid 30's till she died at age 43, from the heart attack. Stress definitely kills people.

[@robertdaoust190]

For me, Canadians in particular and world citizens in general, in the aftermath of the COVID years, are experiencing the abandonment by educational, judicial, medical, financial, and governmental institutions AND fear of reprisals if we choose to reveal our authentic selves. This is such an insightful talk. Thanks Gabor.

[@Lunachic86]

I used to care what 0eople thought of me.i used to wear my heart on my sleeve.now I stay to myself and help the ones that really need. I go with the flow and accept things I cannot change. Life is too short.celebrate each day

[@mouhammad2578]

Some golden nuggets in this talk. Being conscious of what causes your stress is a first step to healing. Worrying about others opinions comes from childhood, so you should grow and not care about people's opinions.

[@othersbyuri]

My smart lovable child is already showing this strength at 4. I am going to continue working on myself but it’s beautiful to witness. There’s hope✌🏽🫂😌💗

[@bastette5475]

Easier said than done!

[@Mahrimae]

Authenticity is the child who has become an adult taking over the need for connection from the parents and parenting/loving/nurturing themselves. This is such important work.

[@thedancingdivaofdaviestree2320]

Isn't it? Doing inner child work for the things I didn't receive as a child made a huge difference in my life. I became more loving to myself, and began treating myself almost as well as I would a friend most of the time. You are right - it IS important work.

[@k.a.6520]

The body mind connection is real and definitely needs to be discussed more amongst medical doctors as to tackle when the body is young.

[@claragarcia2198]

This is so refreshing to hear, not sure why there is not enough talks about this connection!

[@RomansEye]

I find creating art helpful in bringing peace and harmony into my life and can provide an inner solace from others.

[@annalisavajda252]

Well Dr. Mate has also discussed what a toxic environment society has become too and I don't think everyone can adapt to or heal in a toxic environment there's no escaping it for some people that's the lifestyle change they need but that is not an option. It's like domestic abuse how do you recover from that while still trapped and living with the abuser? You don't it escalates and gets worse.

[@The_New_Abnormal_World_Order]

'The only way out is in.' 🙏❤

[@annalisavajda252]

Well it's how people are conditioned also givers need to limits because takers do not but having healthy boundaries and boundaries being respected are not the same either. So many narcissistic types will accuse victims of being selfish if they need any time to themselves or any self care that's why those obituaries sound like virtues instead of insanity.

[@rollandjoeseph]

I stopped drinking alcohol 18 months ago and since then ive learned to say no to alot of things I'd normally would've said yes to. I guess i learned to listen to my needs and grown to be more authentic to myself. My life is completely different but i now have to learn to say yes to myself more and that's a challenge sometimes

[@nocturnalmusiclover1530]

My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer aged 56. Origin the breast. Dead in 6 months. I have early memories as a baby in my cot seeing and hearing her being shouted at, punched, thrown from one part of the bedroom to the next. Over the years there were many situations like this. For me as a little girl the household where children were seen and not heard. Memories of my punches, my slaps, my punishment for the silliest things. The tears I was not allowed to cry whilst being slapped around the living room when he came home from work angry. I have never got over the loss of my mother. Her life was horrible. I know he indirectly killed my mom. The stress of her life and caring for me and my siblings, worrying about my brother and his disability. Worrying about the children she left in her previous abusive relationship she must of been filled with guilt for that. She was a caring woman. Riddled with arthritis and heart disease, high blood pressure. I am working on breaking cycles. Walked away from a physical and emotionally abusive relationship. And continuing to live my life learning and practicing saying NO!

[@ZekromReshiramVolt]

God bless you

[@sunside7]

You have been through so much, but you have survived! I wish you peace and healing ❤

[@clarecollins2547]

😢

[@tinolino58]

I survived cancer and recovered nicely while simplifying my life and requests about 7 years ago. Now I experience Ashma. I think have to reset my live again. Great video!

[@carolrandazzo4713]

Dr. Gabor is so remarkable. He is one of the few Doctors admiting the role of the mind body connection shaped by the environment and the consequences of being part of the common explaination for illness.

[@marilyncallan-cx7rk]

Revelations that, at 88 years old, with a history of autoimmune diseases, I not only relate to, but also will further incorporate into my remaining life. Thank you, Dr Gabor!

[@susieneves9596]

I just want to say thank you with all my heart. I come from a family of domestic violence. My mom and dad have passed on. I’ve always been the good daughter the good wife and daughter-in-law good sister good worker no I’m tired, listening to you help me to resonate my life I am grateful that you have this podcast on KZbin so that I have come across it to listen to it and now I have said no to my work in a very polite way and now I need to do that with my relationship, I was try to keep the peace and not to rock the boat just like my mother did with my father it must’ve been so difficult for my mom. I am not my mom. I am me and I am making the choice to say no. In a very good way. Thank you again for helping me I think we all have it. We just need to hear with a no and the encouragement from someone else so thank you, I know it’s a big sacrifice on your part to continue talking and meeting people for your family that can’t be easy but I would like to say thank you to your family for you and helping thousands of people❤

[@kazartofmodernmeditation]

Mind and body are not separate. Mental health and physical health are equal.

[@doctorstreamspunk9996]

I took this learned helplessness into adulthood. Consequently, when I was sexually harassed, threatened with violence and my career sabotaged at Walt Disney Studios I never called a lawyer or even filed a complaint with HR. It was the same treatment I'd come to expect as a child and as a result I did not feel I had any recourse.

[@Frugalmomandwife]

Be who you are and don't hurt others doing it. If others don't like who you are and those qualities aren't toxic, you do not need them around. Life is too short to spend your life being what others want you to be. As long as you have love in all you do, you can't go wrong. And if anyone thinks you're wrong being who you are with love, they don't know love and can't give you what they don't understand. Never feel bad for setting boundaries even if others find those boundaries silly or harsh, they are your boundaries and this is how you be true to yourself. Being true to yourself will keep you alive longer, promise!

[@user-sv4wp4vj2m]

This 💫🙏🏽

[@adriaflorea9848]

I love Gabor Mate. Finally a strong voice to disprove the myth of "scientific" and "normal" ❤❤❤

[@Gpots]

This was so profound and explained so much about my life in the last 12 years and why my physical health felt like it was slipping out of control - developing a super rare autoimmune condition, arthritis, chronic pain, joint and mobility issues and loss of hair. It all makes sense now, and how things have started to finally improve not because of medical treatment, but from me learning to speak up, learning to say no and not allowing others to cross my emotional and physical boundaries, and not hiding sexual abuse by my ex partner. Thank you!

[@thirstonhowellthebirdandfriend]

We, me and my sisters grew up in an abusive, alcoholic home. We didn’t know it at the time because we were just trying to survive it and there was no benchmark so we thought it was normal. All the families were like that. There was a lot of triangulation and favoritism and projection so none of us were close. Fast forward decades later being the scapegoat of the family and even with CFS, EBV etc I’m the healthiest and recognize now they are sick because of what they endured. They were so cruel and so mean but now I know it was just misdirected anger at me. When the reality is they were angry at my father and my mother and took it out on me because maybe they just couldn’t bear being angry at the people who were supposed to love them so I was the casualty. It’s a shame growing up in these types of family can’t be considered as crimes of violence against the children because the damage is so bad and so life destroying. I was one of the lucky ones and have a good life but I had years and years of therapy despite being made fun of and rejected by the family for it. The whole dynamic is so sad and healing is an ongoing process of diet and meditation, no contact and making your home and life peaceful and drama, toxic free and staying away from the toxic people that we naturally gravitate to because they mimic the environment we grew up in and oddly that’s the energetic dynamic where we feel safe. That dynamic of chaos is all we knew so of course it’s a hard pattern to break and picking all the wrong people, the bad people who mimic the origins that we grew up in so of course they would treat us bad, and triangulate and gossip and project and smear.

[@HillsideHomesteadOG]

My husband used to eat dinner at his mom's before coming home to 2nd dinner. Never addressed any feelings, always stuffed them inside. He had a massive hemorrhagic stroke at 44 years old. He survived, barely, and the brain damage has ironically left him overly emotional and unable to repress any feelings.

[@ranima3408]

😢I am so sorry

[@HillsideHomesteadOG]

@@ranima3408 Thank you. Thankfully he continues to recover and starts his first day back at work tomorrow :)

[@itiswhatitis153]

I am the youngest of 3 siblings. This hit me so hard. I can identify with everything you say. I learnt from small to keep quiet and keep everyone happy. I have been diagnosed with hypothyroidism in 1996. My sister been telling me recently that I care too much and I have to stop and look after myself. Thank you so much... I have to work on myself starting now!

[@flamingsword777]

I was opposite of you, in that I got a hyperthyroid. I too am the youngest of three before my mother got remarried and had two more. I almost died twice because I developed cancer of it and went into thyroid storm twice before I ever knew I was sick. That's what stress for 35 years straight did to me. I did what Dr.G's assistant did. I intuitively knew it was because of my environment and people around me. My mother is either BPD or narcissistic, and so was my ex of 25 years. He was abusive. They both were. I left EVERYTHING and EVERYONE, divorced my husband, rarely talk to my mother and moved clean across the country where nobody knows me. I know that anything dealing with the thyroid has its root in being able to speak TRUTH, living authentically and being humiliated. I hope and pray that you are able to pinpoint and eradicate the stressors in your life so that your life force can flow through you effortlessly and unapologetically. God bless you and please know I'm praying for you! ❤️

[@Kathy-qu8zj]

Same here only HYPERthyroidism( Graves’ disease) shortly after being married to an abusive man..I totally relate and believe what he’s saying 💯%!!!!

[@CelineAdobea]

This is the type of video I feel like everyone needs to see

[@myralhf]

I just love Gabor's ability to speak to the core issues underneath...that totally makes sense...

[@jazzmoon77]

I think the best way to describe the impact this lecture has had on me to is create a sense of urgency to implement and fiercely protect the changes to my behaviours and environment that I already “knew” I needed to make but never managed to make stick.

[@user-tx1ec9wb1z]

Man this dude is on to something. It's great to hear a doc talking about this. It's true the mind can't be separated from the body like modern medicine tries to do.

[@user-lb2nm9ic6n]

Thankyou...my mother died at 48, six weeks after bowel liver cancer diagnosis...a good person who pacified my father who was a very agitated person who died at 63 of heart disease ..you have provided me with new information as to why my authenticity is more important than attachment to my sisters ...thankyou