How To Text An Avoidant (And Get A Response)

Рет қаралды 15,739

Chris Seiter

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 63

@LetYourLightShiiine Жыл бұрын

Who has the energy to deal with these people? Not me.

@blueaqua2122 Жыл бұрын

This was pretty much us being told to conform to the aviodants texting habits...

@roser8911 Жыл бұрын

I know right. They’re selfish!! Run run

@shadawn7134 Жыл бұрын

Anxious attachment style people have the energy - myself included - when we are loving someone truely and deeply this will happen, i am two months in and had very high ups in that time but I am at a extreme low again because I was chasing to much

@TeaLaRee Жыл бұрын

@@shadawn7134 I've been with an avoidant for 18 years. Focus on YOURSELF. 80% on you, 20% on them or others etc. You need to shift to inner and less dependent on others. We've been told to be "attentive", give and give or show you care ironically it just pushes these people away. I get what I want from my avoidant by staying positive and softly welcoming but committed to myself first then them. It doesn't mean I care less, just not dependent on them for what I need. Ironically by doing this I get it without forcing it...

@TeaLaRee Жыл бұрын

@@roser8911who is selfish? The person who doesn't care to learn about their partner and think their way works with everyone or the avoidant who is just instinctively trying to protect themselves...? What if I called you selfish for being needy? You want a ready-made relationship, not a long-lasting.

@achrafhaidi7280 Жыл бұрын

How to text an avoidant ? Don't text em at all

@HM-uj6ud Жыл бұрын

Exactly. Ever. Matter of fact, block them.

@inanitas Жыл бұрын

Honestly. Avoidants should just be required by law to make clear that they are avoidants before they get to know you. Disgusting behaviour and I really don't care if it comes from childhood trauma.

@CitiesOfAsh 8 ай бұрын

And the anxious bpd stalking cheating manipulators seek the same amount of help that they dont seem to realize have a huge part to play in the relationship dynamics.

@robertsmith-williams5255 4 ай бұрын

@@CitiesOfAsh the point is the BPD-psycho ones are told they're the problem and maybe if they're not total aholes get treatment. Everyone tells avoidants that their behavior is OK, desirable and manly even. But it's not. Then you get armies of men wondering why they can't find love, when these are their terms-of-engagement. At least if avoidants are honest about it it'd be less of an upstream battle.

@Borgabobotv 2 ай бұрын

🤣

@poisonorchid901 6 ай бұрын

I don't understand people who wrote" No don't want them back, don't take them back" If you don't want to get back together with your ex, why are you watching this video? Many people with anxious attachment want to get back together with their ex..so here we are.

@CJ74U2NV 2 ай бұрын

Because the person that made this video is doing viewers a disservice. Trying to get responses out of an avoid an ex is one of the worst things you can do. Going complete no contact is the absolute best solution. If you get back together with them, it is never going to work out in the long run.

@CJ74U2NV 2 ай бұрын

Because the person that made this video is doing their viewers a disservice. No one should ever try to initiate contact with an avoidant ex. You should completely cut off all contact and work on improving yourself without them. Even if you were to get them back, it would only be temporary and would cause even more pain. You should just move on. This video is awful advice.

@ketobodybuilder2482 2 ай бұрын

It comes from the avoidant contantly letting you down even if they come back

@mariamvictor8242 21 күн бұрын

For your safety don't go back. . The ones who say No are here because they are hurt & still feeling the pain to some extent.. so tgey are hear to add strength to the decision of not coming back. .& not be deceived by false dreams again

@moniquethomas4966 3 күн бұрын

@poisonorchid901 I'm going through these videos to thoroughly understand this behavior so that I know to steer clear of it next time before I'm in too deep. Grouping the red flags into a pattern is helpful because the rubbish jumps out right away. Also, I am still choosing to deal with an avoidant right now and getting a big picture view of what to expect helps me to navigate our interactions and set hard boundaries on certain things. I can see myself getting fed up eventually, but I'm not there yet.

@Robinrapunzel 6 ай бұрын

Ridiculous, exhausting and harmful individuals. What happened to them as a child was not their fault. However, as adults they have a responsibility to not hurt other people. They need to get help and fix themselves or stay alone. In the words of Bob Marley.. “The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her.”

@truthandlove1111 5 ай бұрын

So tired of dealing with what is simply just bad behavior.

@soumayabellafquih3093 Жыл бұрын

Don’t text them … run 😂 seriously do not waste your time and energy on avoidants. Unless they accept to go to therapy. But then again, you are not a fixer, do not fix damaged people.

@walkertranger5746 Жыл бұрын

You can’t fix damaged people They have to fix themselves

@13sprintuser 10 ай бұрын

Wish I would have known my ex gf is avoidant… and to run

@connorn6378 4 ай бұрын

Then why are you watching a video about texting them? Lolol

@soumayasoumaya 4 ай бұрын

@@connorn6378😂😂 actually I was watching videos about avoidants. I didn’t know these attachment styles existed. And this specific content creator has many many videos explaining who are avoidants. Now that I know, I will not make that mistake again. It’s a life lesson, so listen carefully unless you want to end in a miserable relationship

@alwaysabiggafish3305 3 ай бұрын

Why are you on here if you know better? Sounds like you made too many mistakes and want others to feel lonely too

@AP-ui7oi 6 ай бұрын

Text them this, "I'm breaking up with you".

@petitcoeur-q6r 5 ай бұрын

Didn’t work for me. They pulled away so I pulled away and nothing since then from them. Assumed I’ve been ghosted - it’s been three weeks now

@ketobodybuilder2482 2 ай бұрын

Going no contact can work

@petitcoeur-q6r 2 ай бұрын

@@ketobodybuilder2482 yep - im trying to move on - they ghosted completely a few weeks ago.

@GeoffreyPilkington 4 ай бұрын

This whole video is putting avoidants on a massive pedestal. Anyone who’s trying to analyze an ex partner to this extent has already lost. This is some combination of ridiculous, insane and creepy.

@irena670 5 ай бұрын

Love it! Nailed it!! It works 💯!! I’m healed DA,I know😅 He is DA it works every time :) the only struggle w DA is to get them face to face - once that’s done you almost won:) - just need to make it all fun, light, in flow and leave before they start to need space…. That will make open loop for them to want to repeat the catch up 🎉🎉 good luck peeps❤

@hugorcedeno4394 3 ай бұрын

Is this how you are supposed to text a DA ex too?

@starzmwl9327 9 ай бұрын

the wasting of time is my biggest issue...

@CJ74U2NV 2 ай бұрын

The best response is no response. If someone walked out of you and feels like you are not important to them, why in the blue blazes would you be trying to get them to respond to you. The best advice that you should be getting is to leave them and don't look back. You will find someone of higher value and your life will be much better for it. Chris Seiter is doing viewers a disservice by even suggesting that you can initiate correspondence with an avoidant ex. Been there, done that, and now I'm much better off.

@Elementt4life Жыл бұрын

Like the content hope to see more videos about the anxious attachment style and how to transition from a anxious attachment style to being more secure.

@zachplaysroblox8276 Жыл бұрын

Bravo 👏 👏 Just what is needed that is hardly explored! Life saver Einstein

@nayaninimanthi725 Жыл бұрын

Sir He broke up with me yesterday and today I found your channel.He said that we are not compatible for a futile future hope and broke up This is my first fry and I can't forget this

@HoldenHaan 23 күн бұрын

First fries are the best!

@FrankyboyFloyd 4 ай бұрын

This is so stupid…. If someone doesnt answer your messages, they just dont respect you. Leave them alone. They dont deserve you 👍

@david22591 Жыл бұрын

Brilliant video, thank you.

@fluffythebluepersian4888 2 ай бұрын

What if the DA is leaving me on delivered? Not even reading it ans not opening voice message. So weird and cruel

@robabicicletas Ай бұрын

Put a boundary around it. I told him it was hurting me and I would prefer for him to leave me on read if he was going to take space. Go slow if you are really interested in changing the behaviour and engaging with them.

@robabicicletas Ай бұрын

If they don't respect the boundary, you stop giving them whatever they are getting from you. Respect yourself.

@AdelleRamcharan Жыл бұрын

Watching out of curiosity to see if this would indeed work on me 👀

@jodlethepodle Жыл бұрын

Is this different for fearful avoidant?

@mortiscia 8 ай бұрын

This was a really insightful video!

@hugorcedeno4394 3 ай бұрын

Serious question. I broke NC after 2 months and started using this texting strategy, does it really work with a dismissive avoidant and how long should I keep trying or should I go back to NC? I get positive to neutral and a few negative responses.

@LoSanae_ 3 ай бұрын

I would continue with nc they will contact u if they want mine does every now n then.

@hugorcedeno4394 3 ай бұрын

@@LoSanae_ but you haven’ gotten back together?

@LoSanae_ 3 ай бұрын

@@hugorcedeno4394 we actually have a date planned soon. but to answer your question no not yet but it’s been going good so far. I not really in a rush to get back together i feel like we have to get to know each other again.