HOW To UNDERSTAND The Kind Of PARENT YOU MAY HAVE | LIVE CHAT

A parent who uses emotional and psychological manipulation is pure evil.
Emotional blackmail, emotional incest, and the dark empath parent all seem to have one thing in common (among many other things) which is that they lack the ability to put YOU first in their life.
A parent who engage in behaviors of emotional blackmail and emotional incest have a difficult time putting themselves second in life and catering to the child that they have brought into the world psychologically, emotionally, and physically.
This "global" or widespread negligence of a parent like this is often what causes the child to grow into adulthood experiencing difficult relationships, fears of abandonment, anger management, mood fluctuations, and even suicidal thoughts.
In this live chat, I will break down each of these categories and explain what a disturbed parent like this looks like for some people.
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DISCUSSED IN THIS VIDEO:
0:00 intro
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#trauma #TOXICFAMILY
#tamarahilllpc #emotionallydetachedparents
#familytrauma #parent
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Mentioned In The Video:
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DISCLAIMER:
*Videos are provided for exploration and educational purposes only and does not constitute clinical suggestions or consultation for individual cases.
If you or someone you know is having a medical emergency involving harm to self, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline suicideprevent....
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I'm Támara, a licensed and internationally/Board certified trauma mental health therapist, with over 14 years experience. I specialize in helping children, teens, and families with mental illness. I also treat psychological/emotional trauma in children, teens, and adults.
If you'd like to contact me or inquire about my international consultations, you may email me at [e-mail]. *Please note: all consultations are charged a fixed rate fee based on the case content.
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[@TherapistTamaraHill]

DISCLAIMER: This is a VERY difficult topic. This topic may not relate to you or the parent you had. This conversation is just being introduced to give you another perspective from the field of psychology. If you want to learn more about emotional incest, click here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/j3O9hGiun9Kdgs0.

[@poohbear0320]

I feel like you get me like no one else I have known or met knows me with everything you talk about in your videos. I don't like feeling the way I feel. Yet, non of the therapists I have had haven't seemed to connect my past experiences to the things you seem to be able to connect them to. This is another video I needed. Thank you. What you do has helped make me knowledgeable, but the knowledge is not enough for me. I want to get better and a therapist that I feel will be able to help me and understand me. I have not quite found that therapist for me yet.

[@dark7angel456]

I dont like the way i feel around them either. Lets heal

[@truth4utoda]

This was sooooooooo needed. Thank you love

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome! You and I have spoken about this in the past and I think you could relate to this a lot. Tough topic though!

[@AdamantlyAdams]

If I wanted to be invalidated, I can just go to my mothers' home. I dismissed her from being my mother. I don't have any plans of seeing her. Choices!

[@ilikeitlikethat7305]

I think I was an unintentionally abusive parent at times. I didn’t spank, rarely dated , and went out my way to engage my children in extra curricular activities. But I was in denial about my parents abusive behaviors so I’m sure I had unresolved behaviors that I passed on and I allowed my children to spend time with them. There was also a couple of years when I dated unhealthy ppl . They were brief relationships but I think they impacted my children to see me in that. But I’ve always been open with my children and taken responsibility and continue to develop healthy relationships with them as adults, but one has borderline personality disorder .

[@Andronicus2007]

Hey, sounds like you're doing well. It takes time to heal!

[@darrylharris756]

Gratitude giving thanks and appreciation💛💛💛

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You are so welcome 🤗😊And thank you!!

[@fairygurl9269]

A Mike Drop, then a Light Drop this Topic is a Jaw Drop. "Out the Wazoo" 🐛❤️‍🩹🦋Authentic Hopefulness 🌟

[@age93]

How is narcissistic parental abuse considered unintentional???

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

I wouldn't say that a narcissistic parent who is abusive is "unintentional." Can they do things that are harmful and yet, they don't see the damage they are causing...yes. Just because a parent is narcissistic doesn't necessarily always mean they are intentional. MOST are, but SOME are not. They don't see themselves and they truly believe they are "perfect." I hope that makes sense. Both forms of parents (unintentional and intentional) are problematic.

[@age93]

@@TherapistTamaraHill I understand your point, but being able to abuse in very private, covert ways show they are aware, incontrol, and just don’t care. ***********

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Ashlee, I agree. After 14 years working with these parents, I get it. It's hard to accept that there are some parents who are "unintentional" but very damaging. BUT there are also some parents who are very very aware of their behavior and what they do. These parents are categorized differently. Figuring out where your parent falls along the line is key. Perhaps your parent doesn't fall along the spectrum of "unintentionally" abusive parents and perhaps this doesn't relate to you at all. That's why this channel is for everyone. You may or may not relate and that's okay!

[@Love-rt6kz]

@@age93 hello Ashlee💜 it’s obvious that your mom did not have good parenting skills regardless of intentionality or otherwise 🤷🏾‍♀️ At this point get into talk therapy & group therapy asap! I’ve been in your shoes literally 😕 therapy will save your life , the life you want that is not the life you had growing up with your dysfunctional and traumatized parents !! Lord knows what all your mom and grandma survived!!! Therapy will help you to become the parent you never had !! Parenting glasses are great too however talk therapy is a must !!! My mom was so cold and never Ro texted me even tried to kill me by shooting a gun at me 😑😑 I’ve had therapy for years trust I’m sooo much the mother that I wished my mom would’ve been !!! Good luck ♥️♥️♥️

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you Love for chiming in. I'm sorry you have had to experience a parent like this.

[@Access2rome_Denied]

I receive what you're saying, but in my adulthood this person labeled as my father, downplayed my good qualities as a father to my son! Saying randomly in a condescending way"what you trying to get father of the year award!" This person was a weapon formed against me daily! He displayed hate towards me that I don't know where it stems from! He even let his wife treat me whoever she chose and wouldn't defend me or check her! Im glad i have control over my emotions! I could've easily chose violence against him... he was entertained by making my life miserable! I hate ppl from my Past and I don't Love anyone from my Past either! He expected me to end my own life, he made it clear! Thru it all its still unbelievable how he decided i don't deserve to be loved, have stability, raise a healthy family, do or have regular things! He was also a pedophile probably still is, they are women now and still in his circle but he started having sex with them at 13 and 14! These girls lived across the street with their parents and went school with my older brother at the time!