I Can't Convince My Husband to Move Out of His Parents' House!

I Can't Convince My Husband to Move Out of His Parents' House!
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[@ij1376]

I couldn't imagine the level of...power that the in-laws have over them. I would utterly loathe it.

[@TheGearShots]

I always try to imagine my life without a mortgage. That’s gotta be incredible!

[@mathgasm8484]

He could save a ton of money. Just save for 5 years and you can pretty much buy any house you want within reason.

[@thorpower1015]

Its nice but you still have to have a job to pay billS, maintenance, taxes, insurance, etc.

[@jaidenshill8447]

Exactly. I was dating at 19 and married at 21 yrs. I’ve been paying a mortgage for over 20 yrs but I refuse to pay for another 10 years. Goal is to have it paid off by January. Financial freedom!

[@thorpower1015]

@@jaidenshill8447 you gotta have sources of income to be financially free, not just a paid off house lol good luck and God bless wish you the best

[@utah20gflyer76]

@@thorpower1015 Financial freedom is a spectrum, and paying off your mortgage is a big move in the right direction to greater financial freedom.

[@KingCobra023]

$72K, That is $500 per month per person over 6 years, how do they not have a down payment?

[@mysweettlife]

Amen I don't understand why they don't have money stacked up to put down on a house and a really nice house.

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

Lazy and content

[@FlutterSwag]

Yea i make a 1/3 of that pay rent and bills, i dont know what hes doing

[@kolmarleon2365]

He's a parasite.

[@michaelb.8953]

That's about $330,000 of after taxes but before what little expenses they may have that sifted through their fingers in 6 years. That is way more than enough money that they wasted to buy themselves a pretty nice house for cash.

[@cutlerylover]

When your bills lower you tend to either spend more or make less and are ok with that, so if they only make enough money to live a lifestyle where there is no mortgage or rent thats a financial problem, sounds like they are NOT saving anything during these years of having such a big advantage to do so...

[@thepurpleman119]

cutlerylover hi

[@Cookieboy70]

Exactly. I'm in my early thirties and still live with my folk. Looking back I have not saved nearly enough as I should have all that time. Granted I've taken 6 vacations per year and lived like a rockstar during those vacations, I openly admit it's probably stunted my maturity and financial growth.

[@racpatrice]

@@Cookieboy70 I'm in my early thirties living with my Mom so I understand what you mean. It's easier to overspend 😔😩 been there. The good thing is that you recognize your mistakes and are able to make changes. We live and learn 🙂

[@Cookieboy70]

@@racpatrice Yeah. What gets me when I overspend is rationalizing, oh well, since I don't pay $1K in rent, I'm fine spending $1K on other things. The pandemic while a terrible thing, has forced me by not being not to be able to spend on frivolous things, see how much I can grow financially by being financially prudent.

[@cutlerylover]

@@thepurpleman119 Hey whats up Tim :)

[@BirgettaJohnson_LetsTalkAJR]

There’s a difference between having a familial culture of multigenerational cohabitation vs agreeing to a temporary arrangement and not having your life together 6 years later when you have adult jobs and no major financial responsibility.

[@notafan6]

Parents should have charged rent and then gift it to the kids after they move out. Huge down payment for sure.

[@neetrab]

That would've been nice!

[@HHGHHG10]

I think this is 100% the way to do it

[@notafan6]

@Andrew H I don't think it would be enabling if the children didn't know they were going to get a lump sum when they moved out.

[@saptab1344]

thats true but its sad grown people cant manage to do that themselves

[@rbraxton00]

In six years they should have saved up a 20% down payment. Unless he wants to buy a house out right. Interesting

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

I think thats the idea, why take on debt if you do not have too.

[@iwillrateyou9375]

@@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist because house value can go up faster just put extra payment to pay it faster

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

iWillRateYou Yeah, but you will still have interest, even if it took you a month only to pay off the loan, thats an extra couple hundred possibly. XD I personally think the woman doesnt understand the money they can save. If they both work, and both save money like crazy, and both make a decent enough income, they could have a lot saved, if they can pack away 30k a year, and live off 10-20k, they will have almost 400k-450k in 10 years, if they continuously invested it. And 900k to 1.1 million in 20 years. They would be far better off this way, plus they could then draw interest from that 1 mill, and be set, retiring by 50-60. Thats 10 years earlier than most/Some people.

[@nerad1994]

Yeah, 50k would make a nice downpayment for a nice home

[@empresslonnie1love391]

Exactly

[@justinbrox7782]

I'm living with my parents and saving also, but once you're married the equation changes. Especially with two incomes.

[@aachers7251]

Same :)

[@iwillrateyou9375]

Live with my parents until I had enough to put a big down payment on a house

[@dogguy8603]

@John Adamsct not really, why are you against saving money?

[@dogguy8603]

@John Adamsct why? Give me a good financial reason why it makes any financial sense to move out?

[@DAN13LsYTchannel]

@John Adamsct Whats wrong with doign this if you have a high paying job and your parents want you there? im 24, sofrware engineer and living in my parents basement. Ill leave in the next year, but this will probably enable me to retire by the time Im 40 as I save close to 90% rn. Was I supposed to give up this life changing chance? Its also common in many asian societies to live with family. Why pay rent when you dont have to? That'd be stupid.

[@JordanWilliamsN]

i'm sorry but something don't sound right with this one. 6 years of not paying rent!

[@xieyeet2049]

lol!

[@xieyeet2049]

@Ayawrxsti lol I guess you don't care if your son ever matures.

[@f9w99]

Ayawrxsti I think you missed the point, fella. I wouldn’t charge my son rent either but the fact remains had saved minimum 500/month for 6 years, they’d have 36k down payment saved up. Enough to get a nice house for about 250k and ensure your mortgage is paid thereafter. They got comfy and spent the excess on things of no value

[@JordanWilliamsN]

@@f9w99 exactly!

[@atleastimtrying5391]

Seriously I moved out at 18 and always manage to have like a couple grand in savings and be current with all my bills

[@ktsterlin9304]

You guys should have guidelines for online questions. Where are they on the baby steps? How much debt they have? What is their household income? If I had just those questions answered I would know what to think about this call.

[@gellerbingsgaming]

Omg I could have written this question myself as we are in the exact same situation. But for us it's been 17 years!! He keeps saying we can't afford it and repeatedly reminding me that once his parents die, the house will be ours!, but personally I think he's loving the free life, as the only pay outs we have are our cars and we both work full time.

[@michelejohnson6459]

17 free years and you have car payments! Wow!😮

[@gellerbingsgaming]

@michelejohnson6459 it's only tax, insurance and petrol. Our cars are bought outright

[@chubbytummymafia]

My daughter, her husband and their kids live with me and I love it. Her husband is the son I always wanted. I care for the children when they are at work and we all get along well. The house is big and it's going to them when I die anyway so I don't see why they would ever have to leave unless they move to a different city.

[@thecatnextdoor12]

This is the reason: Your son-in-low wouldn’t be with your daughter, if she/you didn’t provide him with free benefits.

[@Claudia-rl1kl]

There is nothing wrong with this if everyone involved are mature adults who respect each other and boundaries an no one is taking advantage. There are a lot of multigenerational families who live in the same home and it makes life easier for everyone involved and any children get the benefit of being around extended family. Thank you for sharing your perspective!

[@LG123ABC]

Don't pay any attention to the idiots that are giving you a hard time. If your situation works for you and everyone's happy then you do you. I think it's great that you can be so close to your grandkids.

[@kujas]

wow some of y'all in this thread are ridicolous if the arrangement works out with both parties simmer down.

[@rebeccah7279]

My parents are about to do this for me. My husband and I have been renting for over 7.5 years and already bought a condo 2 years ago that is pre-construction (put down 25%). I'm pregnant now and going on mat leave. My parents are letting us stay in their basement for 2 years until the condo is ready. We will save over $50k which we'll use to have a smaller mortgage and a start a college fund for our baby. The bonus is I'm a first time mom so having help and asking advice will be so good. I'm so grateful! This arrangement works as long as there are clear boundaries and adult kids have clear financial goals they are working diligently towards.

[@CarnivoreStork]

New plan for the daughter. Tell her parents that her husband loves the house and they want to BUY it. No down payment needed, 2.5 Loan, 15 year fixed. Everyone’s happy, And they’re investing in their future.

[@jill9606]

Who’s to say they can afford to do that? If they can’t afford to buy a different house, they can’t afford to buy this one either...

[@blackjack444....]

Parents DEED the house over to her!! OOOHH... Nevermind husband is a free loader!! 😂

[@Jane_1994]

This happened with my brother and his wife. After they finally moved out, their life took off in a few ways. My brother got a considerable raise and now, they're renting AND looking at purchasing a home.

[@chrishart8548]

Usually once stuck in the rental trap it's very hard too buy. Hope it works out.

[@Jane_1994]

@@chrishart8548 Hahaha, yeah, they have a down payment, that's why they're looking at purchasing a home.

[@chillinebony]

If they're living rent-free at one of the houses the parents own (i.e., not living with the parents), I don't see a problem, as long as they're saving money, and as both Anthony and John said, clearly discuss their plans and desires for the future.

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

They have lived rent-free and are still not in a good position to have a place of their own because they don’t save and spend their money on God knows what. They are passed discussing their future plans and desires. Can guarantee the husband plans on never leaving and never having a home of their own. There is so much pride in saying “This is my home that I worked for” VS “Me and my family are staying in my in laws house.” They are leeching at this point.

[@botticelli728]

It depends a lot on the relationship between the couple and the parents/in-laws. If there's a lot of manipulation and control or emotional abuse on the part of the in-laws, the couple needs to get out yesterday.

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

Well it didnt sound like there was, or the woman didnt write it in, in anycase, she might just be wanting her own place.

[@hermanhenderson966]

Bare minimum should have atleast 40k saved by now. Individuals have a hard time living under their income level. They consume and consume until theres nothing left. Pretty sad.

[@BaconMountainMan]

6 years rent free? I'd have debt paid off and I'd be rolling in dough. I'd like to hear the husband's thoughts, though.

[@BetYouHateMeNow]

let me get 6 years rent free, watch if i wouldn't save at least 100 k, even with a 27k per year job

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

Well min wage is 7.25, but a lot of places do pay 9-10$ an hour. 10$ an hour is about a 19k Salary assuming its full time. XD

[@BetYouHateMeNow]

@@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist i know I live in a PoS state like that ,NC has more taxes than any other place but have a 7.25 min wage. I haven't worked a job around that wage since I was 16 and would n't work any job for that amount in this economy

[@LG123ABC]

You don't know how much debt they started out with. Maybe they had 100k in student loans and they've been paying them off.

[@BetYouHateMeNow]

you are right but the way she makes it seems is as if they already paid the debt of if any and he still has no indication of wanting to leave.

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

I personally think the woman doesnt understand the money they can save. If they both work, and both save money like crazy, and both make a decent enough income, they could have a lot saved, if they can pack away 30k a year, and live off 10-20k, they will have almost 400k-450k in 10 years, if they continuously invested it. And 900k to 1.1 million in 20 years. They would be far better off this way, plus they could then draw interest from that 1 mill, and be set, retiring by 50-60. Thats 10 years earlier than most/Some people. The parents will likely give the couple that house in a will anyway, why not make use of it.

[@ejsgarage]

Wow I left my parents' house at the age of 18. 27 years later I never return expect for visiting them.

[@amandadean3948]

I know we don’t know the entire story but all I gotta say is if you give me SIX years of not having to pay mortgage/rent... I could do some damage. I’m not understanding why they’re not in a better position?

[@thecatnextdoor12]

The husband is a lazy looser.

[@Ottobot2]

Husband is a spoiled kid and the wife is starting to realize gold digging for the rich kid wasn't as fulfilling as she thought.

[@Lauu_kzallaz]

Time to grow up and be a big boy! After 6 years rent free you can’t afford a home??

[@neetrab]

He probably has the money and ain't tell his wife smh

[@hubster4477]

People just jealous of his rent free gig!

[@Lauu_kzallaz]

Pr3ssPl4y retire in what house? His parents? Is he just going to live there until they die?

[@hubster4477]

@@Lauu_kzallaz it's a separate house, why not?

[@JessicaZane4realz]

Some people have weird issues.

[@BadMannerKorea]

I’m fairly certain in saying almost every person has issues. Most people have some kind of trauma. Most also live paycheck to paycheck. And most are obese or overweight. No matter how you slice it most people have issues.

[@BeautifulDelights951]

It's called being a human being.

[@LetsTalkPersonalFinance]

Her husbands parents are sooo generous! They have totally overstayed and should move out. Where is the money they should have been saving for the past 6 years????

[@everydy]

I agree, definitely overstayed. Also, it's her parents home they're staying in and everyone is ok with the arrangement, except her.

[@LG123ABC]

Maybe they were paying off a mountain of debt?

[@SnookOnTheFly]

My wife is still emotionally living with her parents

[@SnookOnTheFly]

Pr3ssPl4y which is one of many reasons I’m proud to be an American lol. With that said, no matter where we are on this earth as Christians, we are to obey the word not the cultural norm. Our bible tells us that upon marriage we are to emotionally separate from our parents to join our spouse.

[@SnookOnTheFly]

Pr3ssPl4y I would enjoy debating this with you. However, I don’t have the patience to do it in text form.

[@betruetoyourself7162]

Move out. Living with parents is bad for marriages. It doesn’t allow the couple’s relationship to mature.

[@oshares4422]

But they aren't living with their parents. They're living in one of her parents' houses. If there are no strings attached, and I can't just assume there are because it wasn't mentioned, then why would you move if you don't have to. Again, IF there are no strings attached.

[@betruetoyourself7162]

Chukwuemeka Ajaero. You are right, living under their thumb or with them is what I should have said. IMO there are always strings attached 🤣. Example, living with your parent when they own the home is way different then living with them when you own the home. I also know one family who lived in the parents home. When they got a mortgage to buy it from the parents, their relationship changed for the better. They had young kids so the grand parents were more involved when they had a financial say.

[@AmeliaPac-qo2sr]

When this happened to me and my husband. I just told my husband that he can stay with his parents and I can just go to my parents so that way he doesn't have to choose between me and his parents. My husband got so scared for me to leave that he was inspired to follow my advice to be on our own. This while being married for 6 months.

[@53pittmanjt]

Why move out?? If the house is big, the parents are loaded, sounds awfully sweet to me. I'd love to live rent free in a guest wing of a mansion until I inherit the main house. Go with it!

[@MediumValueMan]

Dave and his team did a great job choosing the next generation of on air talent.

[@empresslonnie1love391]

I’m sorry I’m not living with my parents and my husband for 6 yrs . Their both the problem

[@BrotherWaynetv]

I think if they had alot of money save up i don't think she would be unhappy. It must be that they are just sitting around and not seeing much of a growth in the bank account. when u have less bill you don't try hard syndromes

[@ericstewart517]

Problem is w/o 'having to pay' often ppl SPEND too much elsewhere and FEEL broke. It's easier to buy designer sneakers and huge SUVs with all the bells & whistles I bet you that garage is full of 'dream' ish because there is 💰 to 🔥 so ppl tend to burn it and turn around like what happened?

[@blackjack444....]

She needs to recalibrate her husband 😂

[@powderriver2424]

The man isn’t stepping up. I’m sorry if this offends I don’t care how mature or professional a woman is, and that’s OK not against that, but men need to act responsibly be the pillar of strength because if this lady is losing respect for her husband than he’s not being a pillar. The advantage that this couple has has had should have put them a very fine position by now and the man could have bettered himself period no excuses.

[@Wilhelm4131]

When the laws change and men are actually in charge we will step up. Until then me and all the guys in know will do what we want.

[@SherryEllesson]

The only excuse for staying would be if they are bound & determined to pay cash for a house. If the problem is runaway spending and lack of a disciplined budget, (and from the sounds of it, the family is fine with letting them slide) then there's some co-dependency going on and that sense of maturity isn't going to just materialize out of thin air.

[@sunshinesarah4746]

The huge problem isn’t that they get to live rent free, but the husband is okay with someone else providing for his family and no plan for advancement. Listen you can’t just continuously give a man things. Nope, they need to work for it. The comments keep talking about living with parents. It’s very different if your mom comes to live with you than you living in her house.

[@hubster4477]

So husband is comfortable in this situation. Isn't that what we all strive for? Bye bye wife!

[@schawnettarobinson8584]

6 years: I would’ve enough money to buy a house comfortably.

[@SeanBaker]

Just because they're not paying rent doesn't meant they're not paying other debts. For all we know, the parents have no issues with them staying there forever.

[@wwefanforlife23]

And that why they hope they call into show to get more answers.

[@moma5501]

Thank you!! Totally going through similar. My mom passed away 3 years ago and In laws offered their home... well fast forward... we have two babies now and I generously gave them x amount of money for all these years. Aside from cooking, cleaning, and providing what I can. They actually asked me for more so now I’m in this awkward situation. Living with.

[@teemuvesala9575]

@@moma5501 don’t let them abuse you. Pay what’s reasonably owed to them, but don’t fall for eternal payments…

[@Je.rone_]

Are the parents living there with y'all or Is it just their home, because i think there's arguably a big difference between the two... From the video i can't say for sure which,

[@TheCobruhAlienat0r]

They said they were living in one of their properties. So I would assume the parents have multiple houses.

[@Je.rone_]

@@TheCobruhAlienat0r that was my assumption as well

[@user-sr7gp7rj5s]

I really don’t think that’s a problem related to her parents or free rental. They probably have not saved up as much as she expected. He’s lame and has no ambition. What kind of women or men would be happy for their spouses when they are not trying their best to live together?

[@0neofthem]

Dude should have maxed out his 401k and IRA for every year of those six years. Anything less is irresponsible.

[@judymckee5992]

She and him, should be losing respect of yourselves, free rent? What a free loader.!

[@el-ug8zx]

I would either pay "rent" that goes into a account to buy a home. Or arrange with the parents to rent to buy the home from them if they are happy with that.I do think it's fine if the parents have no mortgage and no need for money and will be giving to him in their will eventually anyways, but I would still be put some money into an account so that if it's needed in the future to get a home they can, and if not then they can buy one for their child. I heard of a family that did that, brought a home for his kids, they paid rent on it that went into an account and that money brought homes for their kids who paid rent on it etc etc.

[@coconutsfor2963]

Need more information- does she work or she’s unemployed, do they pay bills in the house or no bills at all - do they buy groceries and backyard products like pool cleaners or gas for the lawnmower.

[@jmc8076]

@2:25 agreed. I’d like to hear from the husband and maybe even his parents.

[@RGTFLA85]

I couldn't be in the parents or the adult children's situation. I can't imagine not paying rent if living with in laws. I believe once you are married, you should have your own place from parents unless emergency occurs. I can't imagine adult children living with me period, unless an emergency occurs and only temporarily.

[@shaloon64]

Interestingly enough, a couple billion people live with there families into adulthood and a portion of that for their whole life.

[@HarPlayer]

In---laws are RICH$$$$$💸💸💸💸💸💴💴💴💰💰💰💰💵💵💵💵💵💰💰💰💴💰💰💵💵💰💴💴💴💸💸💸💸💸💸!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@chrishart8548]

It's up to 52% adult children are still living with parrents. And probably going to rise I think moving out to rent is fairly pointless.

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

Chris Hart Staying with your parents through college, being single and some years after that until you buy a home is a good idea. Depending on your parents for everything in your adult life just because you wanna avoid being independent? Not cute. You one day will have kids and once they start depending on you for everything, say goodbye to “mom can you help me out”. Your kids will depend on you the way you depend on your mom and dad once you have kids of your own. Parents arent here forever.

[@chrishart8548]

@@shutupandeatasmr4498 well my parents split up and my dad is a horder so it's not like he even has a house really! Can't even see the floor in any rooms and he just throws rubbish on the floor. I have 1 child and I literally just work and sleep.

[@jill9606]

Six years rent free and you can’t even put down a good $200,000 at least on a house?? Give me a break! My husband and I saved $60,000 for our house down payment in 2 years WHILE paying rent that was 20% of our take home pay. You’re disorganized and directionless.

[@cookieeemonster1689]

I don't get it why move from somewhere that's rent-free to somewhere you gotta pay rent ?

[@SherryEllesson]

It's called adulthood.

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

I guess you will continue to enable your own children to move their wife and kids with you until they die.

[@cookieeemonster1689]

@@shutupandeatasmr4498 first of all no i wouldn't I assumed it was a separate property that they had and i dont even have kids i asked a simply question cos i was genuinely confused

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

Cookieee Monster the property was intended for a temporary stay, it is an investment for the parents to make money. Not let someone live in it rent free for 6 years. It wasn’t a gift.

[@Micheal93k]

The problem comes when you are like these guys. You're not building up to anything and just leaching off someone else. The parents are enablers. Which is actually more people than you'd believe. Alot of people say they are planning/saving, but in reality they are freeloaders.

[@bman5257]

The title is wrong, and the reality is even worse. It should say, "My husband wont move out of MY parents' house."

[@vjs4539]

I don't see the problem here. If the parents let them stay there for free, so what? Not any different than if the parents gave them a house.

[@iwillrateyou9375]

Yea I agree

[@josephcoatofmanycolors]

Practical reason or not, never move back to your parents house, be responsible. God said therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24

[@angryarkie1642]

So.. the parents aren’t actually living there? What’s the problem? I sometimes feel like “honor” and “respect” are sometimes such overwhelming and confounding sentiments that it makes people look real stupid. I need more information..

[@roolyfe]

6 YEARS! Hope you stacked 💰

[@jennyhammond9261]

My mortgage is $500 (below average, but easy number to work with). As a single person, and only counting the house payment, I could save $36,000 in 6 years. The have TWO people working and if they're doing anything right, they should be saving more than just what they would have spent on rent. I'm so confused.

[@sketchyarttimeswithskye3320]

Hey, I'm a female from Ohio, about to be 21 in a couple of weeks in February. When I was 18, at the end of 2020 I met this man who was sweet, kind, and loving from North Carolina, absolute dreamboat. I moved in with him and his family into a small mountain town in North Carolina in 2021 after I graduated high school. His family and us have STRUGGLED financially for various reasons to the point of eviction. I love him more than words can say and want to spend my life with him but unfortunately I'm not happy where I'm at. I miss my family and friends, being in a big city, having the endless possibilities at my fingertips. But he doesn't want to move away from his family, like maybe once they are financially stable he will like to have our own place, but as far as moving closer to my family I don't ever seeing him being ok with ever. I don't know what to do and I'm honestly very lost, to the point I don't even recognize myself anymore hardly. I know it's my fault because I decided to move when I didn't have to but I didn't know how it would impact me and I do still very much love and want him. What do I do? I'm afraid of losing him if I pushed the matter about how I feel

[@erkfx4154]

I think the issue with the respect and mature adults part is that the parents haven’t given them room to do things on their own. She doesn’t want to rely on others for her and her husband to survive anymore. I don’t want to be married and be living in my in laws home either with them, or in their extra home, because I don’t want to feel like a free loader, I also want privacy, and I definitely don’t want strings attached to anything. My girlfriend and I have talked about that for when we get married to help pay off student loans by staying with her parents because their basement is basically it’s own apartment except you still have to enter through the front door then walk through the house to get to the basement. I don’t want to be 28 and living with in-laws. I’d rather grow on our own and accept full responsibility for our lives and either work more or take a little bit longer to pay things off. I get what she’s saying.

[@The.Man.WithAPlan]

Tell him your leaving without him. I bet he will follow.

[@dankbreh9013]

They need to hear the husbands side. Her side of the story sounds suspect at best.

[@allisonwaters716]

Husband sounds like a loser.

[@vladamirkb1]

6 years and you don't have a large amount of money saved up.

[@1.5Koreans0.5American]

Thank you for sharing!

[@Vydio]

What are the parents losing in not being able to rent out the house? Six years living rent-free? Could not do it.

[@ClaxtonBay123]

6...Years?!?!? No rent or mortgage for 6 years I would have $150,000 in the bank JUST based off rent! How are they not ready?!? This is insane.

[@chrishart8548]

There. Is a woman involved she probably spent every thing.

[@larissagonzales6075]

6 years that should be enough to pay off a decent house depending on where you live. They are not saving sounds like.

[@hannahhutchison2189]

God help me. My husband and I are in a similar situation and we have been living in my parents house with our seven year old, for way too long 😢 Its been 7 years.

[@MoneysNoObjectwithDylanHowell]

If your wife is losing respect for you, it’s time to bounce! It’s been 6 years of free living, so you have to take responsibility for yourself at some point and start making the moves that will get you where you need to be long-term! Getting comfortable can ruin your ability to move forward! 💯

[@BadMannerKorea]

No it’s time to get therapy. Giving up on marriage is arguably one of the biggest issues in the USA. It hurts kids, families, people who divorce are more likely to be divorced again, it hurts the courts and men especially, it’s hurting people’s desires to even get married etc.

[@MoneysNoObjectwithDylanHowell]

BadMannerKorea I’m not saying leave his wife, I’m saying it’s time to bounce from the parent’s house!

[@kolmarleon2365]

6 Years for FREE ?

[@Scout887]

Im 33 and living with my parents. Rents and buying prices are very expensive here in south germany. This way i only pay my part of the rent and can save more money. When i would move out, i would have to pay x3 times more rent. But even when i save, the housing prices just go up and up. Its madness, real estates are priced like palaces and i probably wont ever be able to buy a house, ending up in a trailer and move with the working opportunities like grazing animals in sahara desert moving with grazing land and water.

[@ImVeryBrad]

any options to move to any other areas that are more affordable?

[@andrea6053]

The parents know their daughters husband is irresponsible but they don’t want their daughter to be homeless.

[@pdxmusl1510]

Yep. Mostly agree. I don't think making the decision to move back with someone's parents to resolve a serious situation is immature. It's quite a mature choice to seek help when you truly need it. Again, it's a serious critical situation like I'm about to be homeless. Or I've got cancer. If its.. I don't want to pay bills.. then you're not an adult It's even ok to go there without a plan. Simply because you're in an emergency. However.. once things are a bit more stable.. you need a plan. Not having the plan. Or even trying to make one is the immature part.

[@Justsayingthat]

I am not moving unless the in-laws are causing problems. Plus, there is not sufficient money to buy a home. Staying. Was there an end game plan?

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

You are missing the point entirely. Them living on a parents property was suppose to be a temporary option. As anthony pointed out, they SHOULD now be debt free and SHOULD have a large cash down payment on a house of their own.

[@Justsayingthat]

Shut Up And Eat!! ASMR That is why I asked was there a real end game? Was there a real plan with milestones and dates?

[@winningwithgeorge7298]

This couple will not grow until they get out of the in-laws home. They should have a boatload of money!

[@robinbaez6643]

You can’t beat free rent though, so it’s a win-win for both

[@aolvaar8792]

? what would the parents do, if they were not living in the property? ? sell it, put the proceeds into a beneficiary account, and give to them when they die. 6, half dozen or the other

[@doompod]

It’s not less mature, it’s a better situation, financially especially. If she wants to move, they need to discuss it together. They both agreed to move there, and they both need to agree to move.

[@neetrab]

Sad... he probably has the money and ain't telling her.

[@maralinautube]

His parents are Enablers. It sounds like she's married an Adult Child. Hopefully she gets tired enough to do something on her own without him!!! This is way bigger than finances... this is dysfunction... I hope she seeks counseling to get to the root of her Codependency & toxicity!!! If she continues this way, her purpose can not only be stifled, but dissipate. When the two become one, it's about being Purpose Partners! 😪

[@matthewwilliams9200]

someone's being lazy staying in house free of rent for 6 years means at least 60k most likely 100k plus saved up. its not just him its her as well make a plan now stay til plan is complete stack up money now.

[@arrozinc7]

The husband might be a man-child aka. a PeterPan. IMHO: Wife should find another place to live, move out and see if husband values his marriage over his relationship with his parents to follow her. Marriage counseling recommended asap. Questions that I have include but not limited to: Do her in-laws drop in to see them often and without notice? Does her father-in-law drop by, unannounced, to "putter around 'his' house" doing random repair and maintenance & then stay to have a cup of coffee? Does mother-in-law ask when those anticipated grandchildren are going to arrive & is this house close enough to where the in-laws live, that she can stop by to "help" with those babies? Is the husband spending the saved rent money on fun stuff and hobbies for himself, making it impossible to acquire savings for rent or down-payment for a house & keeping this couple always slightly in debt?

[@shutupandeatasmr4498]

Also how much do they make!!!

[@jgw9990]

Good insight Phoebe.

[@RichardLeo-mf3zb]

Ask for a divorce unless he gives in.

[@jordanaubrey-realestateinv334]

Get rid of the crutches and start to walking!

[@auhbreykumming4429]

I think she's absolutely ridiculous! Stay there for free as long as possible! Of course they should have tons of money saved up!

[@kueen7538]

No matter how she presents it free rent is going to win every time.

[@tjnaples]

Turn it into a frat house and charge covers! 🍻

[@AJ_SouthernGal]

Jon said they're living in one of her parents' properties, so the parents probably aren't there. It sounds like she's ready for the next step & her comment about respect is very telling - she's probably frustrated since she's been talking to him about moving for a couple of years, & possibly that he's taking advantage of her parents generosity. I imagine she feels like she's still tied to her parents & wants complete independence. Not sure what their bills & income are like, but setting the goal for having a downpayment by a certain date needs to be part of the plan so they can see a physical step toward having their own place.

[@Shadowwind4]

I’m shocked Anthony is still single, he’s hot and smart, he must have some crazy baggage that we don’t know about.

[@thecatnextdoor12]

He said that he is a cheapskate. No lady likes that.

[@Shadowwind4]

The Cat Next Door maybe what he needs isn’t a lady 👀👀

[@deanalbertson7203]

So, she's getting free housing, and complaining about it. How about be grateful, and use this time to save up enough money to pay cash for a house?

[@Vydio]

They've been doing this for 6 years and still aren't in a position to buy. How long is her husband planning on doing this?

[@deanalbertson7203]

@@Vydio I guess you think she should divorce him, and marry someone else. Then she could complain about something completely different.

[@Vydio]

@@deanalbertson7203 You'd think wrong. Just like an answer to the question .... for how long is her husband planning on doing this?

[@deanalbertson7203]

@@Vydio Free housing? For as long as possible. I guess you could give her free everything, and she would complain about that. Then ask her to pay for part of a mortgage, and she would complain even more. Seems like a Karen to me.

[@idadho]

The 2nd String Team missed an important question. Would the husband take a monthly check from his in-laws in the amount of what that home should rent for? What has this couple been doing with the money in their rent or mortgage budget over these 6 years? 6 years of saved rent payments is a 30% down payment.

[@sonohrina2012]

I agree a man is way harder to convince me and my mom easy my dad my husband and my brothers I try for weeks and months and if they’ve decided to make a bad decision they have too much pride and they stick with it

[@jeffreywhitaker5154]

.......Please start off by acknowledging this tragic day...We Will Never Forget....

[@BadMannerKorea]

It’s previously recorded footage.

[@jeffreywhitaker5154]

@@BadMannerKorea ahhh. That makes sense. Even though their date says 9-11 I guess that’s the date that it was put out. So I guess I should hope for them to send a shout out for 9-11 in the next couple days??🤷🏽‍♂️🙏🏽. I’ll be on the listen out. We will see if you’re right.

[@listenquitely2888]

The main question is, you live there for 6 years. How much money do you have save to "buy a house".

[@RusskiCommieBot]

They should just be debt slaves to JP Morgan for the next 30 years as they try and pay off a house they can't afford! All the young, want to be home owners can thank the Federal Reserve for printing trillions of dollars buying up 1/3 of the mortgaged back security market. The Fed has made it dam near impossible for young people to afford a home!

[@iwillrateyou9375]

Get a house they can afford

[@herbertscott9575]

Like a young Chris and Dave, the patawans growing up💯

[@DJ239]

Don't move out and stay poor! If they let you stay save up for the down payment or pay in full!

[@kimberly77ish]

I agree with both of them, but in my opinion just because your single doesn't mean you can't give advice regarding issues in a marriage. BTW this is some foolishness, lol.

[@deuteriumjones]

If I heard this right it’s HER parents, and her husband and parents are totally happy (it sounds like they have *land* not a basement) she might need to eat this one. I think as long as her parents are happy with them living on the farm she might need to accept it. Why they don’t have a pile of cash is another question

[@too-da-loo]

I don't understand the lady in question. Living rent free and has an issue with it.. I would have saved like crazy, continued conversation with the parents to ensure no surprises, get debt free and then save up for vacations and retirement. There is no lack of respect here just because you are utilizing a gift from someone.

[@djpuplex]

Tracy wants hubby to shell out cash and do the opposite of a good financial decision. Briffaults Law, it's there nature. I don't blame them the species (and mostly all successful species) survived because of it.

[@faw3162]

0:53 I get the feeling that the other guy might be slightly intimidated by the fact that John has a Ph.D.

[@butterfingers112able]

A PHD but he's so annoying 🙄

[@neetrab]

I wish I knew how long it would take for them to buy. 6 years, I'm hoping they saved up quite a bit.

[@Java4Rosi]

I know a couple in a very similar situation... looking away .