I didn't have friends most of my life - being ‘unsocial’ and finding belonging

I didn't have friends most of my life - being unsocial and finding belonging
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[@TheCottageFairy]

Thank you for all the birthday wishes last week! I clearly leaned into my candle obsession in this video 😅 so many candles lol winter always gets me feeling cozy and wanting to create a comforting space and welcome in the light. Take care ❤

[@dkm6054]

Love the candles and the advent calendars ♥️ your videos bring a sense of coziness to my life that I myself haven't been able to cultivate yet. Thanks so much for sharing your perspective on friendships and belonging, I feel like a lot of us need to just remember there are different ways to find connection and that it's okay to be on your own unique path.

[@elendil7]

Happy Birthday! ♐

[@DaisyTea1]

Sorry I missed it! Happy belated! 🎈

[@nennepanrikefairytaleart4773]

I have often felt like I don't belong anywhere with anyone, except in my imagination lands..., but here, on this channel I have discovered that there are more people who haven't felt that they belong, so now we can feel that we belong ... Thank you for allowing yourself to rethink and renew your relationship with your videos! It is healthy! A late happy birthday to you, dear Paola!!

[@esthersanchez2264]

ENJOYED every second of this video, glad U had a memorable birthday! 💝😊👍🏽🎂☃️🎄Short and sweet.

[@lindafontanesi501]

I am 72 yrs old and just now accepting the reality that it’s OK to be alone and not lonely. Thank you for validation !

[@hspsperspective]

Proud of you :)

[@adrianar4260]

People are created for relationships, .we are not always really lonely, and being alone to much can be selfish

[@MeggsFilms]

There's a lot of people in the world that do not choose to be alone, and sometimes once you are, it can be so incredibly difficult to encourage yourself to seek company even if you are lonely. So no, it isn't selfish at all. Some people just prefer a quiet life in this increasingly aggressive and loud ratrace of a world. Having the mindset that you always must have company, or be in a relationship can make you feel less of a person or like you haven't 'achieved'. It's an unnecessary social pressure. Some people thrive with company, but for others it can be very draining. We aren't 'created' for any purpose other than to experience life, in whatever capacity that is right for that person.

[@cindyritmeester]

@@MeggsFilms Amen 🙏

[@secretdoorgaming2024]

@@adrianar4260 Is it really selfish to want to be alone and enjoy either nature or solace I think not?

[@imdurmac1]

Introverts can find peace with their own company and still make space for others.

[@Arena204]

Ditto

[@kerryjames6312]

I am an introvert to

[@ihatehumans487]

I refuse

[@rozzahrivera6903]

true😺👍🏻

[@rrina5354]

Yo right. I have no friend but friendly to everyone😅 And we're quick to say 'Its Ok' coz we cant stand an an argument. No friends no enemies!😅😅😅

[@michellecremers361]

I'd rather be alone than being in groups or relationships where I FEEL alone. Thank you Paola for being you ❤

[@luba-healthywithluba6866]

So well said 💕

[@amandaallen9460]

Same..#ihavebeencalledaloaner

[@carmennatividad8804]

same here. i think 90% of my life i have been alone, i am contented

[@jjjackson5183]

So true. In groups, I am invisible anyway, but the energy around me is so loud and fatiguing. Still, there is some loneliness to being alone. For once it would be grand to have someone understand....

[@michellecremers361]

@@jjjackson5183 Yes, loneliness and being alone can co-exist. But I find myself even more lonely when I'm surrounded by people who don't get me and sticking to them, because I 'should' have a (large) group of friends.

[@jiyun1214]

I don't have friends in my life.. Sometimes, I felt lonely about it. I'm glad to know that there are many people who are similar to me in this world😊

[@LyndaPogue-w4e]

I love my own company, enjoy being alone

[@lolliiii328]

me too, i always feel not comfortable to be in a group of people, and i have no friends

[@yasmintera]

You are not alone with that feeling :D

[@MoniLaguna]

I feel the same way 💕

[@daydreamer28]

Yeah I was surprised to find so many people. Everyone around me tell me that I crazy... But I feel OK to be alone most of time.

[@bodhisattva2348]

If you don't have friends just know, you're not missing anything. I've had all types of friends & 95% of them turn out to be a disappointment.

[@Veilfire]

Yep

[@anacorona2527]

And takes time and effort to maintain. Sometimes you don’t feel necessarily “recharged”, conversations turn repetitive or you engage in behaviors that are not in your best interest (talk about other people, stay up late, drink).

[@-Viva-Cristo-Rey]

Im glad you acknowledged this , social media tends to glorify friendships a lot and it makes you feel like scum when you don't have the same things to share.

[@jmc8076]

@@anacorona2527 For me too many conversations feel one way. You’re talked at vs with. IMHO bc so many are suffering and lonely they’ll overshare too soon too often. I try to be aware we all have issues to deal with. Time and place. If I walk away knowing some more about the other person I feel like I actually listened. Did I contribute? I do own I’m very private and dont trust easy so a bit hard to get close to. I’m 55 and don’t have close trusted friends but some was by choice. My husb is the opposite and agrees with this video. Peace and health.

[@focused7786]

@@anacorona2527Couldn't agree more. I started to wonder if there is such thing as a "friend cycle". Lol.

[@-Viva-Cristo-Rey]

I can actually pinpoint the times in my life when I've had no friends , and let me tell you something , id rather be alone than have the wrong friends in life.

[@toyeshverma2299]

💯👍

[@simakhant6300]

​@@toyeshverma2299very true

[@MissAce-tq9xu]

Surprisingly, the points in my life where I have been the happiest were when I had close to no or a small circle of friends. I could focus on myself and not other people’s drama. It was very peaceful.

[@userpgfkdnndjnnxn]

There is nothing called as wrong friends as such broski. It's self contradicting. Probably they were just some bunch of people who came into your life to teach you what not to be friends with and how not to live your life. I also have had quite similar experience. Sometimes finding people outside turns out to be a total disappointment. But just be in terms with that, accept and move forward without any resistance.

[@faiththrower7951]

Agreed

[@katarinadropuljic3024]

Its better to be alone than with wrong people, less people less drama, it works for me Edit: omg ive never had so many likes tysm guys

[@valeriebingham1483]

Same here.

[@Dun1April2024]

Very true , lots of love from India.

[@prinsipevlogs2741]

Same 😊

[@nothing_is_over]

'Less people less drama' great words.

[@katarinadropuljic3024]

@@nothing_is_over thank you ❤️❤️

[@lr.red.writes]

This is so relatable. I used to try so hard to have friends just to avoid loneliness. Now I see I was lonelier when I tried to fit into groups I didn't belong in.

[@angieang26]

Yes it's a horrible feeling being around people you can't be yourself and comfortable with. That alone in a crowd feeling is miserable.

[@berlianasean3915]

You are not alone , me too😢

[@JosePerez-qq2qj]

That's right. I guess there exist a group for people who don't belong to regular groups. I grew up trusting this.

[@ainerosemcgowan559]

Oh, Paola, this video really hit home for me. I am 48 and have felt much the same all my life and am content to only have couple of close friends, most of whom are of an older generation. I have seeked out a quiet life in the woods as well, working with plants and nature and am happy to surround myself with animals companions and focus on my home life. It took me decades to realize there was nothing wrong with me, I'm just an introvert and highly sensitive person. Much Love ❤️

[@williambent9636]

I feel the same way. I am never happier than I when I am all alone in my little cabin in the woods. People think I am an extrovert because I am a public speaker who loves to share my historical research with interested others, and I do enjoy meeting new people and going to new places, but I also find it exhausting and am glad to get away from it. It's good to hear from others who aren't ashamed to say they prefer to be alone. Why are we taught that being alone means being lonely?

[@mifnp8887]

Me too ❤.

[@keiraLeeYuna]

Eu também busco uma vida tranquila.

[@TJ-kz1ul]

Wow you and I are so much alike. I'm 46. I am just learning about myself that there's nothing wrong with me, this is the only kind of life that makes me happy.

[@dianeknott3655]

Oh, Paola, me too! I'm 77, retired from art licensing (which was an at-home job), and I also had a needlework and framing shop years ago, as well as doing many art and craft shows. When I had my shop and when my husband and I did shows, it was so much easier to meet people. I have friends, but only a couple of very close ones, plus a dear friend from across the country who is a kindred spirit and we both wish we lived closer to one another. I'm alone much of the time now, I still work at designing needlework, so I am busy and fulfilled. But now it is harder to meet friends in my community, as I also have a lot of physical issues that make it difficult for me to get around. I know people because we have lived here for almost 30 years, but given my circumstances, I'm glad I have my designing since I don't get out much. You are so blessed to also have your art and all of the creative things you do. Believe me, they will sustain you throughout your life. They are such gifts to cherish. Mine have gotten me through cancer, as well as my husband's passing a little over 2 years ago. I too am an introvert who loves people, but my mind is like a sponge and having too much activity can be draining for me, resulting in sleeplessness. Finding other kindred spirits is truly a blessing, although a rare one. I so enjoy your videos. Your gentle way of approaching life and sharing it with us is so NEEDED today. Your videos are a respite from the banality of what's "out there" on offer today. Keep on keeping on because you and your creative spirit are appreciated. Diane

[@elendil7]

True friendship is rare. You find out who your friends are when you need them most.

[@garymartin5898]

I’m losing my sight til i have surgery..I have lost family that can’t deal with it..I can’t drive anymore..I miss sewing,creating,painting and looking at my home..but I have my husband of 40 years..thank God everyday for him..I love these videos🥰Becca M

[@carolinelawrie7142]

So true... I found out who were my true friends during Covid....

[@garymartin5898]

@@carolinelawrie7142 ❤️

[@courtneyawalsh]

Correct.

[@emmalynne7851]

I found out who my true friends (and family) when I was diagnosed with cancer.

[@meljay5660]

As a child I remember daydreaming about finding a friend just as quiet and introspective as myself. Someone who would also connect with me on a deep and peaceful level.

[@Shafeek258]

Wish I could know you

[@writerforlifeify]

I think you found that friend within YOU; in all others we unconsciously seek ourselves.

[@Shafeek258]

@@writerforlifeify oh that's deep

[@suewilkinson1391]

You sound just like me

[@mjhan1145]

I hope you found your people.

[@thetranquiltent]

I'm 29 years old. I live with my mom. She is 49 years. I love her so much. ❤ Love you mom 💞

[@JohnDoe-vy5hh]

Incest is wrong.

[@BDogs10]

She is a young Mum x

[@ssia65285]

Same here

[@RavenWolfDrum69]

So lucky

[@dung965]

You're lucky!

[@katharenchamberlain5721]

I am mostly friendless, the exception being the constant companionship of my cat. I consider all of you fellow viewers and Paola as friendly spirits that touch mine. ❤

[@suepumphrey1559]

That is so sweet!

[@rrhines3151]

I can SO relate to the love and companionship of your cat… I too had a special cat who lived 18.5 years; I threw Sweet 16 birthday 🎉 party for him, much to my husb & daughter’s amusement! He’s been in Cat Heaven for many years but I still hang his collar on my Christmas tree 🎄

[@snowpea10]

@@rrhines3151 18 1/2 years is amazing bless your heart

[@skiyogagirl]

This is beautiful! 💛

[@kaytieistrying]

Totally relatable!!

[@hopelove7167]

It's better to have no friends than to have friends taking advantage of our goodness😊

[@androi999]

true

[@JUSTIN-ry4dn]

🛑🛑🛑 Please PRAY FOR THE WORLD .KJV 🙏🙏🙏

[@AminaAmina-ji5nb]

Да в наше времялудше дружить только с животными .кошка тебя больше поймет чем подруга .

[@LeonHuang-nj2nr]

Yes sir ☺️😺

[@chegrace5830]

So true

[@kimauten1844]

I love it that all of us introverts can come to this channel and be “alone together”!!! ❤️🥰 It is so peaceful and quiet here....being understood and accepted...you put such beautiful words to how we feel...thank you and bless you Paola...you are such a gift!☺️❤️

[@sincerelyheatherlynne]

I love that thought. :) haha We can all come & be alone together. :)

[@mirisucree4163]

Best comment! Such a sweet sentiment. Wishing everybody a very wonderful, magical and cosy holiday season!❤🌲❄

[@mayracaceres3813]

@@mirisucree4163 gracias!! lo mismo deseamos para ti

[@carolyncarlon9870]

Alone, together. Nice! I know a wonderful couple that shared they “don’t get out much/don’t socialize much”. I suggested we start a “social” group…..and never meet. HA! We all had a good laugh! 🕊

[@JbFerronier]

Being alone together… exactly 🙏🏼 Paola, the Voice of introvert people ❤

[@hungryoldsoulkarma4380]

People often confuse solitude with loneliness and boredom when in reality it's quite the opposite 💜

[@deannacati]

This was so comforting. I’ve always been called “the quiet one,” and I’ve felt out of place at school. It’s like any of the friendships I’ve had had withered away. I’m almost 30 and still feel like I haven’t found “my people.” I’m trying to be patient and to just go towards what brings me joy, even if I am doing most things alone.

[@lunakaisol]

Literally same. I’ll be 29 next year and I always wonder if I’ll ever find my tribe. & It seems harder to find the older you get. But I also try doing hobbies & find that focusing on my own happiness & growth brings me so much peace. I’m sure I’ll make that connection somewhere along the way :)

[@MiaK06]

Absolutely nothing wrong with that Embrace your introverted nature I remember reading a quote by a famous pianist (Mitsuko Uchida) once who said that she ‘finds socialising tedious’ And the comfort I derived from that I can not begin to tell you It is perfectly ok to enjoy one’s solitude, to be more comfortable alone or in v small intimate settings Embrace it and do what makes you feel good! Nothing wrong with you at all!!!

[@PokidotGamer898]

Same here

[@GlassCaskett]

I'll be 30 this year, and while I accept myself for who I truly am I don't believe I fit in anywhere. And I'll never find a 'group' I belong to.

[@secretdoorgaming2024]

Maybe you will never find this tribe of yours or your people. But maybe it's because you are not of this world but something else. I think this sometimes earth is not our home but heaven is which brings me comfort. If you ever need a friend or someone to talk to I am also alone with autism and people have hurt me so much because of this so now I am shutting myself away from it all.

[@parkerposey788]

There are more of us like you Paola than you think. ❄️ 🐿 🐇 🦌✨🤍✨

[@Mel92py]

X2

[@marinajarafort658]

💐

[@mohdbilalansari5687]

😊

[@bettinastebner]

I'm one too! Just need a few, close bosom-buddies for life.

[@vigilantwarrior512]

✌️

[@laurah6381]

When I tell people I’m an introvert they always try to “help” me. “Why don’t you try this or that” they say… as if being an introvert is wrong. I love that I’m a kind gentle old soul who loves being surrounded by animals and nature. ❤❤❤ The world is too loud for me.

[@rachel_espinoza]

Where are you from, if you don’t mind me asking. Because introverts being forced to be more social is a very American view

[@laurah6381]

@@rachel_espinoza I’m from the states

[@kesheekabhookhun2081]

Glad to know I am not the only one like that

[@ingakamynina8056]

Omg you described me

[@birb.]

@cherishedcatlover2943 I think being introvert is only a part of feeling comfortable with someone, and then there are other qualities too. I suppose some people who are introverts do like being in social settings or having more things going on even if they do need quiet time afterwards - I used to try being friends with people who seemed calm but I then discovered they actually like going out and doing stuff with people, and had different qualities too. So it might be about 'seeing value in peace and calm "

[@manuelacassia]

❤At the age of 45, after going through very critical moments, choosing your journey well and staying away from toxic people who do not share your good intentions towards nature is essential. I chose to live in a world I created. I talked so much that I couldn't hear myself; Today, I talk less, I have almost no friends to trust. but I trust myself! in my choices! and I know I'm not alone. I'm a great person for myself.

[@INFJ2]

Your comment brings me comfort

[@SmokeyJoe4444]

Love this.

[@pamelabautista4229]

Love your comment

[@kruggyy]

Sometimes we’re our own best friends and that’s perfectly okay

[@Truerealism747]

Great comment is your health good to

[@adibzadeh]

To me, being alone - not lonely - is the purest form of being in touch with reality and life. When I'm alone, I feel like I'm truly living my life; and anything else I do, is for making these alone times more high quality and longer.

[@ladyquinn2559]

I love how you said that, Hamid.

[@barbmcculloch7010]

Alone is very calming and soothing. One can learn a lot about oneself when alone.

[@kelliefarkas2095]

🎉❤😊

[@pragyatripathi25]

Thanks for motivating that's why I deleted my statement 🙏

[@miffedmicrobiologist6595]

Alone, al one, all one.

[@mepeaches2499]

Being alone is not as bad as others think, being alone allows you to do your own thing, learn new things and reach new heights in your spiritual growth.

[@PraveenSrJ01]

Great comment. People unfortunately have let me down many times

[@elainemartinez2021]

Needed that reminder, especially today.

[@mariadejesusabigail]

I enjoy being alone. I like socializing but being alone is the best time. People have hurt me along the way and when I try to have a friendship it all happen again. Then, I realize that being alone is the best choice even thought some people see me as weird, depressed, antisocial, etc...they judge without knowing the reasons why I prefer to be alone ..

[@Moonie-zw2me]

I , too, have been hurt by people in my life , but then I shifted my perspective and spent time with myself, with my sweet solitude and now i have a brand new perspective of finding and tracing my own kindred spirits, my own tribe ... I wish you all the best ahead in your journey and may you find your kindred spirits:")

[@karenvanetta]

Totally related

[@fredom1118]

I find people that are extra social don't understand and tell me to be sociable. I don't justify myself to them. They think they are right.

[@aqsaaqsa1061]

a9

[@consciouscitizen6211]

…totally relate

[@That_stetho_girl]

I’m living alone in my medical college hostel since past 3 years since I discovered what a toxic group of batchmates I’ve got…and believe it…being alone is sooo peaceful 🍀

[@semperfi6801]

I feel the same as you. I've been in the military for 30+ years and honestly might have one person I can honestly call a true friend. Mainly because the people I've met over those years were not even closely like minded, they drank, smoked, and just had their own lives they were consumed with. It is so much better being alone because I've been able to solely focus on my own personal and professional development as a leader in my organization and I am totally happy with where I am.

[@awiejunguori8031]

I spend my first year medical college trying to make new friends but it was all not worth it i got hurt ,deceived,made fun of because of who I am ...it taught me so much and living alone peacefully is better then hanging out with people who torture and bring metal distress

[@dsjayawardhane3498]

I like to hear you..the same as mine...for years I met only three friends ..I'm 74 year old grand ma..I'm spending a peaceful life..I wish you good luck !❤❤

[@ZeeshanHaider-uq9zu]

Hallo medical studen you spend first year in medical but i preparation for medical test God bless you..

[@melissaoleary8196]

Just wanted to say that scrolling through these comments is like looking at one beautiful flower after another. You are a group of amazing souls. Thank you for sharing your stories. I feel less alone tonight.

[@estherbaettig]

We have millions of cells in our own body to communicate with - how can I feel lonely? 😀

[@theramblingrose_]

It’s so nice, isn’t it? I had no idea there were so many of us out there 😌

[@kimlangenderfer7493]

Such a lovely comment! 🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

[@SonetLandman]

@@kimlangenderfer7493 I agree

[@kimlangenderfer7493]

@@SonetLandman 😊

[@tomas5376]

I’d far rather spend time creating art or carving wood. In my 81 years I’ve had many acquaintances, but few that I’d call friends. I find true joy in solitude. You’re certainly not alone Paola. While we may not be friends, there are more than a million of us who enjoy our visits with you! Gracias🙏🏼

[@rrhines3151]

Perfectly expressed 💫

[@twpsy634]

I'm in my 70s and feel the same.Best Wishes to you !

[@stellajohnson5301]

the one thing about loneliness is that you are never alone in that.

[@SonetLandman]

@@stellajohnson5301 well said 💕

[@sweetstufff]

I'm a shy, HSP introvert who always struggled to make and keep friends and always felt that no one understood me. I love being alone. It is nice to see more people like me. It seems there are more introverts than we think. Cheers to all my fellow introverts. Thanks for this lovely video.

[@tayaklein1408]

Cheers!

[@kids-bb4xk]

Same brother

[@hspsperspective]

We're many HSPs here seemingly xD sending you much love!

[@audreykonkle449]

I'm a HSP introvert as well. I've been seen as shy and quiet. Cheers to my feel HSPs!

[@yoli5779]

Are you me?

[@Zumi-wil]

나쁜 친구들과 함께 있는 것보다 혼자 있는 것이 낫다

[@magneto44]

well said 👍🏼

[@dawn4999]

ABSOLUTELY!!! ❤

[@wimalism]

Yes. That's true. If you haven't Good friends your lives, live alone.

[@Nimabuu]

But there are many good people who can be your best friend ...

[@高語辰-e9q]

@@Nimabuuif we could find them, we wouldn’t choose to be alone. We just failed too many times and got hurt too much trying to find them.

[@flowergirl7260]

I love this video. I don't call myself introverted. I call myself inward, contemplative and reflective. I don''t call myself anti-social. I call myself deeply social, because i love a good conversation with another person but not aimless chitchat at a party, so much. LIke-minded souls and kindred-spirits are gifts along the way, whom i treasure dearly.

[@SearchForTruth1111]

Flowergirl this is me 100%.

[@azranurokan7707]

Its me

[@PraveenSrJ01]

That is my personality also

[@ramyagunasekara4850]

My reflection

[@angelicasysnila5476]

Your username fits well with the kind of person you are 🌸🌺

[@ad6417]

I haven't had a single friend for over 30 years. I am not shy, I'm sociable, but I abhor superficial communications. I've not been able to find a woman of intelligence and emotional depth for a long time so I forego friendships. I'm just not interested in wine Wednesday, Girlz Nite Out at the club, or group spa dates. So it's just me and my dog.

[@Mikiiiiiiiiiip]

sounds like my kind of people. unfortunately I don’t think we’ll ever meet 😢

[@ELCinWYO]

Same here. Where I live people are always at the bar and I'd much rather be with my dogs and my cats.

[@anthuy8366]

Con người chỉ làm bạn hoặc kết nối với người họ cảm thấy thích hoặc có lợi gì đó cho họ

[@lizzyaalexis7850]

I can relate, especially to the "wine Wednesday, Girlz Nite Out at the club...". Not that there's anything wrong with those activities, I just find them tiring and overwhelming, rather than enjoyable. I'm glad to know there are other people who feel the same. I have a parent and grandparent who either try to pressure me into these activities or belittle me for not being "the life of the party" like they were at my age.

[@akferren1]

Same! I’m 52 and I’ve never had a best friend, never did a girls night out or weekend getaway, never been in someone’s wedding.. I’m single and I have my dog.. peaceful quiet life

[@LourdesGzz]

In my experience, it is very hard to find real friendship and once you find it, sometimes is hard to stay close.

[@HandsomeJigglypuff]

I was surrounded by friends growing up. It wasn't until I was an adult that I realized most people suck. And the genuine ones tend to be alone and not want attention from others. I realized there was power to being alone - finding a sense of personal identity, more time to build skills, solitude brings creativity, etc.

[@swagmanexplores7472]

I prefer to be a lone wolf than be surrounded by ‘friends’ who betray or try to use me. There is immense strength in being comfortable alone

[@bodhisattva2348]

Story of my life, story of my life, I've attracted the some of the worst ppl.

[@adamtoofarwest9104]

Same story.. different author

[@Chicky-C]

Facts

[@kdjoshi726]

Yeah I always yearned for true friends. Sadly, I ended up used. Now I just vibe alone, or with someone who feels like they're ok with me

[@--legion]

There's a difference between loneliness and solitude. Solitude is good and should be encouraged, loneliness is just bad. However, wallowing in one's introverted nature reminds me of people who are proud of some spurious psychosomatic 'illness', it makes them feel as though they belong.

[@tiffanyspann20102010]

I can totally identify. Being alone most of the time allowed me to create a safer, healthier and peaceful space for myself. I connect a lot through reading literature, music and watching entertainment programs (operas, KZbin videos, & etc ).

[@rachelerickson7321]

One of my favorite quotes that has always stuck with me has been "As we grow older, we realize it's less important to have lots of friends and more important to have real friends."

[@issamifijjaj9508]

Being likethatmyself I realized that somepeople are just meant to be alone. It's a lifetime learning process.

[@yellowclouds18]

Paola, this video made me cry. I am 25 and very introverted. Despite that, most of my childhood I had a lot of friends and the fondest memories playing and creating fantasy worlds with others. But when I became a teen and into my early 20, while everyone around me was partying and clubbing, I struggled to make friends because that wasn't who I was. From 18 to 24 I was very depressed, wondering what was wrong with me and how I could get that sense of childhood camaraderie back. Thank you for this lovely video that shows how there are beautiful souls out there who also value quality over quantity and who value being alone. Today, I am comfortable with myself and I consider my pets, partner, family, and 2 others my closest friends and I am quite content. Books are also great friends :)

[@mistral4967]

Hello ! I love your comment, it really describes what I exactly feel. I am a 19 years old university student who is currently living in the campus dorm and I struggle with making friends because I am not the type to just hang out, I crave something deeper. A connection that lasts a life time maybe, I know that sounds so hard to find yet I can’t stop myself from yearning. I am also a introvert who likes to spend her time in quiet and peace preferably in nature. Growing up I had lots of friends and was a very social child but all my friendships were very superficial, couldn’t really make a connection with anyone. I never felt alone by myself until I stated university 2 months ago, I see people going out and clubbing yet I cant bring myself to enjoy that no matter how hard I try. I see people hanging with their friends or their partners and it makes me question myself whether there is something wrong with me. I don’t like small talk or superficial conversations, I want a friend and a partner where I could truly open myself up and expect the same in return yet I struggle a lot these days. I am also struggling with mental illness issues since I was 14 and they don’t really help my situation as well. I truly don’t know what to do, I tried to be more like everyone else yet I don’t feel comfortable when I pretend. Your comment made me think maybe there is a hope for me. Would you mind sharing your thoughts on this matter, I really would like your opinions and advices on this matter. Thank you so much. I wish you a beautiful day ! ☺️

[@MsEdnavfloureiro]

Tears came running my cheeks reading your comment. I am 30 and i really understand your words and feel them very close to my own experience. I had lot of friends but the years passed and i struggle to maintain friendships or find people that I can connect with. So books have been my friends and two close friends that live in a different city. But it's good to see we are not "alone" in our way of life. Thank you 🙏🌼

[@erikal85]

Me too 😢

[@bravewarrior862]

Very relatable, me too

[@MeemahSN]

It’s better to be alone than to be with people who make you feel alone. I’d rather have no friends than ones that are fake.

[@ccco8639]

Amen.

[@TrangLinhKhuc]

you are right

[@yvettebennett6170]

I am 53yrs old. Moved to a small town in southeast Texas. I can relate to so much of what you are saying. I dont have any friends still after living here for 10-1/2yrs. Nobody has time for deep relationship. People talk about transparency and they are anything but transparent. Society says you need a tribe yet I dont have one and I have felt like there is something wrong with me because I do not want one nor desire one. I have gone to events and have felt very alone in a room full of people. I do not have time for these surface level relationships that most people have the time for. I would rather be alone. I am ok with it. In this stage of my life. I have embraced it. My husband is my best friend and I am grateful for him. The Lord is my strength. He is always with me and I am never alone.

[@MyWalks]

Thank you for telling us about yourself

[@Georgeanne17]

Amen.

[@tea-chip-cookies]

Omg you have described my life down to a T! I'm 34 and live in the U.K. Ive felt this way since I was 15 years old. I'm always alone, no matter where life takes me. I tried my best to have a fun happy life, but the whole of my 20's where filled with loneliness, sadness and bad company literally wherever I went. I learnt and understood my fate and into my 30's I've learnt to embrace being alone whether I like it or not.

[@HeddaLuiza]

I thought that is something wrong with me... Thank you for sharing your eksperience. I know whatbare you talking about. Sometimes its dificult, to be honest...Greetings:)

[@rc1983]

Very true. Superficial friendship is a waste of time. We all can cultivate cultivate friendship with nature and animals.

[@shakydolphin4125]

I always thought it would be amazing to experience a best friend, at least once in life.

[@Carrymejane]

I found one in a game

[@dawn4999]

A good dog could be your best friend. They love you unconditionally, will never tell your secrets or pains of your heart and they don’t judge you. ❤ My doggie is my best friend!

[@EdyYT66]

expectations > reality (You always have the rest of the Toxic/ 0 remorse Normies to ruin ur life in secs) staying alone seems the best option these days

[@a12i9]

I have the same deep wish of having one true soulmate, that values the same things as I do.

[@pastrami00]

I always wanted a best friend. I thought I had one when I got married. But she left after 18 years because I wasn't social enough.

[@livelikeliz]

It always feels good to hear that others feel the same way. Especially when we're young we often tend to think that we have to adhere to societal standards, that we have to go clubbing and partying because that's what you do in your 20s. I caught myself telling someone once: "I'm so glad I'm past 30 now, now I don't have to pretend to like clubbing anymore." People will often ask me why I go hiking in the woods by myself and think that I must be very lonely when in reality, this is when I am most at peace. Channels like yours are an important contribution to reaching people and showing them that there are more people like us out there who just enjoy other things in life and that this is perfectly okay. Sending much love 💕

[@ginamarieofficial]

I so relate, love!!

[@user-on7zd8yi8g]

I agree completely!

[@bonniebinsky6666]

I totally agree. Plus I also like to hike alone. 🌲🌳🦌

[@livelikeliz]

@@bonniebinsky6666 It's the best, isn't it? Glad to hear there are kindred spirits out there 🥰

[@dohajouaher3906]

I'm 30 now i love it ❤

[@emrsngs]

You just described my entire life...introverted, needing deep connections, animals and plants give me more connection than humans, feeling more at home in nature than most other areas, in my golden years and haven't met my people. Alone time is healing ☺

[@cinemaximum5654]

Are you Turkish just curious

[@aguspisciuneri9510]

Sometimes we need a real connection as a humans being 🙌✨

[@Dilshoda1]

Knowing that I am not alone, that I am not the only introvert in the whole world, makes me feel good

[@semperfi6801]

Isn't it the greatest feeling in the world to know we're normal and there is a whole world out there that feels the same way we do.

[@hb11912]

I’m 55 and female and have lived a solitary existence for most of my adult life. I haven’t had a lot of friends and those I have had have used and taken advantage of me whereby now I don’t bother anymore. I don’t live this way by choice, but when you have lived in my shoes perhaps you would understand. I would rather be a lone wolf than be surrounded by fake and shallow people who take advantage of your situation. I am also an introvert but again not through choice. I count my partner and my daughter as my best friends. Unfortunately, society judges people like me where I’m considered weird and different. In my opinion, it’s society who has the problem in not being accepting. I don’t feel as though I’m hurting anyone being a solitary person, nor is it stopping others getting on with their lives. I’ve learned the only one you can count on and trust is yourself.

[@elissaanne1953]

Your video is beautiful! I'm 69 and don't have friends. Acquaintances, maybe. I love animals, books and art. I cherish being alone. I provide positive behavior support to children who have suffered trauma and struggle in school. I live in a small coastal village where there is way too much gossip. Being alone is amazing. Thank you for your videos.

[@secretdoorgaming2024]

I am in my 40's and alone also with no true friends. I was an artist and sold my art all over the world including my self published books but I realize now nothing is more cherished than being able to be alone and content with one self as I get closer to the earth through helping it with feeding the animals and planting trees and native plants I find solace through this and comfort in God and my faith. I live on an Island and yet I wish to travel far away one day. If you ever need a friend please reach out to me but I wish you all the best in life.

[@syang1116]

it’s universal that every small town or tiny village has nothing but gossip… 😂

[@lellymills]

Same here. 60, Lincolnshire, England. X

[@swarnaherath9014]

Have you read books by Thich Nhat Hanh? If you haven't yet,do take time to read them, they are amazing.

[@TRAVEL2.0876]

Hello friends

[@Nuska126]

I'm one of those quiet people on the Internet that rarely talk to anyone here but recently my therapist told me that I am a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) and now everything that made me that "broken" person makes so much sense and I'm just so happy to share it with this channel's community as I think that there are so many more fellows like me here. This channel of yours it's a safe space for me to feel understood and I love to hear your thoughts on being sensitive during my new journey to know more about myself. Thank you so much Paola!!❤❤❤

[@autumnidle5412]

I relate 100%! I used to think that everything I feel was the result of trauma that I had to heal, until I started reading about HSPs. It blew my mind to realize that there's nothing wrong with me; I just naturally experience life a bit differently than many others. Love and support from one HSP to another!

[@paulinemckelvey9001]

@@autumnidle5412 I had to wait until I was over 70 to make this discovery.- since then my life had become better and better. I feel we are so fortunate to know what sort of people we are. I love and admire Paolo so much for having the courage to share her HSP reality with a KZbin audience. She's an inspiration. Also as a huge change agent without trying to be that.

[@CameoFarmer]

My cat Imogene is my solid rock. No matter the struggles I'm going through, even in the hardest times when friends and family feel distant and the relationships strained, my little kitty is there for me. I think human friends are important, but an animal friend who's always there for you is a priceless gift.

[@ellen823ful]

Kitties 🐈‍⬛ and dogs 🐕 are the best. I also had a pet cockatiel. 💕

[@bunch3008]

Idk why but i am enjoying so much by sitting on my chair of my room and doing my stuffs rather than hanging out with friends

[@vannordonia885]

Same here🥰

[@Ellary_Rosewood]

I have never had, nor still don't really have friends. I've always been a very solitary, anti-social person who finds their peace alone. I have never felt lonely, nor do I experience feelings of loneliness. Even when I moved to the other side of the world to a country I had never been to, and a place where I knew absolutely NO ONE, I felt perfectly at peace. I had one friend who I saw maybe a couple of times per month, but other than that, had almost zero social interactions other than the market and restaurants I went to. I honestly feel like it's a bit of a superpower. 😊 Could have to do with being autistic, but I feel happy being my own best friend. I have found belonging within myself. I'd still like to have a small group of close friends and a community one day, of course, but I'm perfectly fine being my hermit self. 🥰 Thanks for another lovely video, Paola!

[@williambent9636]

I think you are right: the capacity to be happy, all by yourself, is a power many people do not have. Good for you! And thanks for speaking up about it.

[@bergannon6585]

I love your description, being your own best friend, being your superpower ❤️🎄❤️ Blessings from Ireland ☘️

[@wildflowerwind6941]

My son has high functioning autism and has no friends. He went to college and never made one friend. It is so hard as a mother to watch that. I worry he is lonely.

[@bergannon6585]

@@wildflowerwind6941 Have that conversation, maybe he needs to connect with others like minded people. Blessings to you 🎄❤️🎄

[@shreyaqian4873]

Your solitude will be a support and a home for you, even in the midst of very unfamiliar circumstances, and from it you will find all your paths.

[@demproblems]

I have been a lone wolf my entire life, and until the age of 23 I was constantly depressed because I knew that I am socially awkward and people just tend to avoid me. However, now that I come close to my 30's, I have a wife and just couple friends that I keep close to me and that's all I need. After I managed to build my house, buy my dream car and make myself more visible among others, people that hated me somehow started to like me because I am financially stable now. I feel sad for them, and happy for myself that I learned to live alone, and now I have absolutely no problems spending time with only my wife, or alone when she is gone somewhere.

[@hannasulanting]

I pray i have that kind of life, solitude and harmony

[@ldive]

How did you make friends? People keep saying join clubs... college life is lonely

[@hspsperspective]

Happy for you!

[@JYYB]

@@ldive you dont. Thats the thing. Either way it shouldn't bother you, you live your life how you want, make yourself happy not others. You will soon find those who actually care about you, they will be their for you when you least expected it but once you do that when you make friends.

[@shinobu_study7984]

Am very proud of you :) i hope my life turns out that way am 16

[@autumnlover760]

There is a reason so many of us gravitate to your channel. You bring hope, peace and gratitude to this unsettling world. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

[@phuc-dien]

Hello, I live in Vietnam, I also live alone, I receive sympathy through your videos, I really like them. Thanks ❤

[@AM-bm2xw]

I was emotionally neglected as a child, so it has taken me a long time to figure out who I am and realize that there is nothing "wrong" with me, and it is still a continuing journey (at 30 years old), so videos such as yours are so encouraging and beautiful. Thank you!

[@fay6124]

Im 29! And feel the exact same way I didnt realise till about a year ago that i was an introvert , I always just thought there's something wrong with me not wanting to spend time with people 24/7

[@SonetLandman]

You are blessed to have realised this fairly early in life. I am 57 and carried this burden on my back for a very, very long time, but finally the light came on and it changed everything for me. Everything.

[@JennaMoon]

This video was so needed for me today. Being introverted while also craving social connection is both wonderful and difficult. Some days I worry I am not enough, but I am. And so are you and all of the lovelies in the comments here. ♥

[@sincerelyheatherlynne]

It's interesting- that thing about social connection & being introverted. I find that when I do get to have a good, deep heart-to-heart conversation, it's so fulfilling! But more shallow social situations are very draining.

[@judynagle2979]

@@sincerelyheatherlynne Thank you Heather, very well said, I feel that way too about social connection and being introverted

[@sophiaisabelle01]

We all want to be friends with you, in some way. Being alone gives you more time to reflect and learn more about yourself on a deeper level.

[@mult1coloured]

I'd argue that being around people does the same! It allows you to find out what you think and how you react to certain people and situations

[@mandyxu7095]

I must note down your words into my dairy book..I am also introvert person. 'Being alone gives you more time to reflect n learn more than yourself on a deeper level'.

[@Karincl7]

If you want to be friends with a stranger on the internet, you don t know what friendship is

[@tychopanda]

@@Karincl7 online friendships exist too. Are you really gatekeeping something so simple as friendship?

[@hspsperspective]

Yup, nothing equals some quality time with one's self 💙

[@Lorena-dv9hr]

You are so beautiful and well spoken. People have made me nervous my whole life. Always in fight or flight. I retired from health care at 55, and I discovered I love being with cats. So I have three boy cats, and I am hoping to adopt a girl older dog soon. I do feel love for people and every life I find interesting, Very nice soothing channel. Thank you.

[@Truerealism747]

Have you found anyway to get out of fight or flight

[@lilou2023]

There's nothing wrong with enjoying solitude in nature. It's an innate need for artists and philosophers who need to connect with beauty.

[@artisthusnatalal3099]

Well said 👏👏👏

[@semperfi6801]

Amen, well said!

[@teachersusan3730]

I think everybody in this community can relate ❤. Alone time is heaven. I even travelled around the world by myself and never felt lonely. And met beautiful people on the way.

[@deloreslowndes762]

I have often wondered if I were 'broken ' or 'inferior ' somehow but after watching your videos I have come to realize that I am just my own version of 'normal ' and that's alright. Thank you for that.

[@muhammadkhoja]

I agree with most of the things you say here: Good friends are irreplaceable. Sometimes, it takes a long time and a lot of failures to find true friends. Do not forget, good ones always show up along the way.

[@naturewitch8687]

I’m an introvert and empath so I love spending time alone with nature ,meditation, journaling, art, spending time with my partner, dog and looking after my home 🏡 I have up until recently thought there was something wrong with me but I now know it’s me and that’s ok ❤

[@ccco8639]

Nothing wrong with you. You've just described who 'I' am. Lol I'm beginning to think that Maybe 'we' are the more normal ones. ☺️

[@jantune]

You’ve also just described me… I know people often find it strange but my home, my crafts and my dogs are all I need. And my wine! ❤

[@nazmiyehilalldemirrr]

​@@jantunei was extrovert when I was younger and I am an empath. İ am getting introvert because of i am an empath . İ feel people's pain so deeply and it makes me feel sad everytime. İt's kinda hard in these days. İ am 25 years old and I realized that in my this age , it's so tiring for me .

[@ccb.8603]

Hopefully I can find you one day

[@eternity.in.a.m0m3nt]

You are not alone if you have partner, don't bullshitt

[@alma3817]

Dear Paola...this comment is a bit irrelevant. My grandmother has breast cancer and a risky surgery next week. I have important exams too. Altogether, the stress, fear and anxiety is overwhelming. My friends, quite justifiably, can't quite understand what I'm feeling and I just find it hard to pretend everything is normal. In the midst of this, your video today brought me peace..and connection. Thanks a lot for that. Sending love ❤️

[@suemichalka7941]

Dear Alma, My Grammy Josie noticed a lump in her breast while visiting us in Hawaii, and I was the one she chose to share the news with. She ended up needing a radical mastectomy. My heart goes out to you at this difficult time. Please know that I will be praying for you & her as the days & weeks ago by. Grammy Josie lived through her ordeal and for many years afterwards. Aloha, Sue🌺💜🦋

[@kimauten1844]

Prayers and blessings to you and your grandmother...🙏🏻❤️

[@FaithandFlowers]

I am praying for thee and thy grandmother. May God bless you both. ❤

[@AZIZAxBLUE]

Sending prayers 🙏🏼🤍

[@Angela-ep9pm]

Just prayed for you both.

[@WishfoolWitch]

I’m 29 and live alone in a small rural area, and work from home. I love being alone with my cats and nature, watching the birds and squirrels and a family of groundhogs. I’m drawn to the lifestyles portrayed in Miyazaki’s / Studio Ghibli films. Having done the whole college and city night life, moving back to nature as an adult felt like coming home. I will say it makes the prospect of finding a partner…challenging, but it seems even though nothing is stopping me from moving to a nearby city again, I’m drawn to this quieter place. As if I’m supposed to be here. As fields and forests around here are cut down to make room for bigger yards and more cows, I feel like a sort of guardian of this small piece of nature. Which I know sounds cliche af 😂 but alas. It seems for me, the call of the lightning bugs is just louder than that of the city lights.

[@akhilanair33]

Same I'm 28 and I don't have even one friend and I really love to enjoy my life with my dog Brucee 🐾 he's 11 now and also more dogs & cats the rest of my life ❤🧿♾️

[@jaleesa00]

How do you work from home. Like what job

[@Forest2763]

​@@akhilanair33❤🎉

[@sarahjimenez1879]

I’m 29. This was well said, and beautiful.

[@salsafiestaspb]

​@@akhilanair33but you have a friend, the best friend you could have ever had - your dog.

[@annalindgren2946]

This video has the most wholesome comment section I’ve ever seen. This channel has clearly cultivated an amazing fanbase. As an INFJ it brings me comfort to know that there are others like me out there - lonely but never alone. Befriending yourself is the best relationship you’ll ever have. Stay true to yourself and I wish you all the best for 2024! ❤

[@hustlemami8732]

Hello fellow INFJ ❤

[@williambent9636]

Thank you for showing that it is possible to be happy and fulfilled without being "popular," as in part of the in-crowd. I have always been somewhat ashamed of not having many close friends. People do assume that if you don't have a circle of best friends around you at all times that something is wrong with you. Being alone does not necessarily mean you are lonely, or unhappy.

[@leannecox6427]

Yes I have always felt shame too. So pleased I am not alone in that. I’ve felt that there’s something wrong with me for years and I’m learning it’s not true. Such internal conflict which can be so uncomfortable. The fact is I like my own company and I think that’s a gift. You can never be lonely then.

[@bamboopanda1626]

I feel comfortable by myself. I don't like the loud noise and chatter that comes with friends and I've just accepted it. I don't like small talk and gossip that most people do to fill in the silence and I don't like that people can think of nasty things to say about each other but never to their faces. It's annoying.

[@pamelawamala6751]

uggh ... small talk.

[@homeiseverything]

I’ve come upon articles and videos on the subject of ‘how to deal with introverts’, as though we introverts aren’t half of the population. The irony with introverts is we take longer to make friends, but in the end, we make for excellent, loyal friends. Excellent video

[@alinafirs4777]

All the things you write about are very close to my heart. I'm almost 50 and it's only now that I've realised what friendship and close people are all about. It's taken a complete change of environment. Only now I realise that those who I thought were friends were not...I also realise that you can't be close to many people...if you are close to 2-3 people, you are very lucky.

[@1983alexla]

I always want to have friends, but I find it’s hard to find anyone, I feel myself very socially awkward, and people don’t understand dislike me, i feel hurt but couldn’t explain myself, I further avoiding people to avoid their dislike.. I have to force myself to be like others in this society because being myself it means not being friendly, rude, etc..thank you for this video, I feel I am not the only one feeling this way..

[@meditate65]

Just be yourself you don't have to please anyone, love yourself and be kind to yourself others don't matter. People are funny when it comes to friendships. They become friendly when they want something that's it.

[@Buttercup12345-c]

Sounds exactly like me .i have Aspergers

[@wolframgerber7118]

Hallo 1983Alexia, ich kenne Ihr Problem leider nur zu genau. Jetzt, da die verbleibende Restlebensdauer bereits sehr überschaubar ist, bin ich über die Begriffe "Introvertiert, Bindungsstörung" zu dem Stichwort "Sozialphobie" gelangt und finde, dass die hier gegebenen Erläuterungen ziemlich genau mein Problem beschreiben. Ich hatte bisher mich immer als "Sozialeremit" oder Beziehungsasket bezeichnet. Da hätte ich vor 60 - 65 Jahren Hilfe brauchen können. Solange man jung ist, erkennt man sein eigenes Problem nicht. Ich hielt es zwar nicht für normal, aber glaubte, dass ich eben nun mal so sei. Hilfreich wäre es gewesen, wenn die Eltern oder die Lehrer sich darüber verwundert hätten. Nun, jetzt gegen Ende, will ich wenigstens ergründen, weshalb es mir nicht vergönnt war, an den eigentlich schönsten 20 Jahren des Lebens teilhaben zu können. Schauen Sie mal unter den aufgeführten Stichworten, und viel Glück. Tschüss Wolfram.

[@eli-yk7lx]

i can also relate. i also have a resting bitch face, which makes me seem unapproachable. i’m also not very expressive, so it makes me come off as rude and uninterested (which is the opposite) i also come off as “child-like” (people treat me like a child even though i’m 20) i don’t know what’s wrong with me.

[@bscraftsandarts8990]

​@@eli-yk7lxcan we be frds?

[@belle.etrangere]

I always said to myself "I like to stay alone with people that likes to stay alone". 23 and still hear from people I'm "different". Made peace with myself, it takes time for me to trust and feel attached and it's just fine.

[@ellen823ful]

I got called “weird”. Lol 😆

[@spoton95]

@@ellen823ful Even my mom called me "weird". That's why I like to be alone

[@lenoroshamann6679]

I don't know why. I really like to be alone. And that's why I like to go country living amidst nature someday.

[@blaiseaimee7098]

I say to myself: "nobody is my friend/everybody is my friend". It's like a zen koan and makes me feel better.

[@solitarysea]

Anti-social myself and my mother always tried to fix me in some way, telling me it's wrong to be cooped up in my own shell. Past age 16 though reading Rilke's ideas on solitude and interacting with people more like me, started to realize there's actually great power being alone, and that there's no need to force yourself to put on some persona and pretend you like socializing. I've always felt my mind is enough to stimulate me ("normal"(mind I put it in quotes) socialization for others overstimulates me, same goes for most sort of media) but your video is calming and just right for my fragile mind. Lovely peaceful vid!

[@jrbracy]

Your videos always make me feel like I could cry. This one feels very familiar. My teen daughter is the same way. The most sweet, thoughtful, talented and deep little soul who has a hard time in the friend department. She said to me recently, "mom I just want a friend who I can talk about life with." 🥺 That kind of friend is a rare find and I hope that it happens for her one day, she truly deserves it.

[@esthersanchez2264]

Maybe, thats a conversation she can share with U. At least U have each other. 🙂

[@sincerelyheatherlynne]

Oh, I feel the same way she does! (but I'm 40) haha It's not easy to find a friend like that, but they're sooo valuable when you come across them!

[@sarahg3156]

I hope so for her as well. My first close friend happened for me at 23. It is so difficult to experience as a teenager.

[@jrbracy]

@@esthersanchez2264 oh yes! We are best friends 😊

[@esthersanchez2264]

@@jrbracy That's so special, wonder what thats like. Glad to know U are related to Ur close friend. 😊

[@viccimauldin9786]

The world and people can be really nasty. That is why I stay to myself. I have always been that way. Tired of being abused and traumatized by the world. Even my family. You are precious. Very happy for you Paola. ❤

[@sprinkles611]

YES ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!!!!

[@luu9159]

I agree, however my personal goal in this world is to help kids and animals.

[@diediedice]

@@luu9159 I wish you best of luck and success with your life goal!

[@luu9159]

@@diediedice Thank u

[@bgi384]

Omg and I thought I was hurt by many people only bcos am in india

[@Sejutii]

This is not just a regular video but a therapy to so many people out there including me and all the comments in this video are beautiful and inspiring ❤

[@gaildavis710]

I am 69 and have not had many friends. Most everyone was out to get something from you which I never fell into that and if I did, I bailed out real quick!!!!! Myself, I love giving, never asking for anything in return. But when I just need someone to talk to I totally rely on Jesus and my husband of 43 years!!!! You are not alone!

[@elzapasztor6559]

🌼💮🌸🌼💮🌸✨✨✨So true!!!

[@JYYB]

🥰🙏🏻

[@paulak3221]

Amen.

[@gaildavis710]

@@MidnightHero64 OH Beverly, I am so so sorry over the loss of your husband! Mine is going through health issues also!!!! We just celebrated our 43rd Anniversary!! I wish you the very best dear!!!! Although at times we do not understand God's reasons for things, HE is ALWAYS with us!! Take care and keep your head on a swivel!!! As far as friends go, we are much better off with some of the "so called" friends!!!! Merry Christmas and hope you have a Blessed New Year!!!

[@secretdoorgaming2024]

Praise the Lord! He is my only true friend, my true love and beloved I have nobody but Him, thank you for sharing this Gail. You are blessed to have a husband.

[@jeanellegrima6178]

you know y're on the right channel when you scroll through the comments and want to like all of them because they so resonate with you. many thanks Paola for creating this awesome video xx

[@athenarsify204]

Being alone but not feeling alone, it is peaceful and fun, working on yourself to be better everyday..

[@bad.darling]

Сейчас мне 33 и у меня только в этом году появились новые друзья спустя долгие годы. Но я не чувствовала себя одиноко. Лучше одной, чем с теми, кто тебя постоянно разочаровывает. Мне всегда есть чем себя занять. Я занимаюсь каллиграфией, учу иностранные языки, вышиваю, тренируюсь, бегаю, иногда путешествую и тд. Я много смотрю аниме, фильмов, сериалов, читаю и сделала дома целую библиотеку и мне никогда не бывает скучно одной. У меня никогда не было апатии иди депрессии из-за того, что я провожу время одна. Как можно скучать и грустить, когда мир такой огромный и в нём столько интересного. ❤

[@12oq]

мне тоже 33, но пока что новых друзей не нашла.. где вы познакомились с новыми людьми? Интровертам тяжело..

[@ЛилияАлександровна-ф1я]

​@@12oqиз какого вы города?

[@trunzia]

When I was a teenager and complaining because I didn't have many friends after moving to another country, my grandfather told me he considered he only had two or three friends in his life. Which I thought was completely absurd because he knew so many people and was so popular, even at his age. But now that I'm in my early 50s I understand that is true, you'll have lots of acquaintances in your life but only very few real friends. In my 20s I thought I had tons of friends and I became an expert at mindless chitchat, only to discover those werent really friends but just people I knew. Now I enjoy my own company and my closest family, but have no illusions about the "glamour" of socializing.

[@furrymomo1]

The glamour of socializing, how aptly put~

[@christiegroves]

I am 51 as of the 30th of August this last year, and this is how I feel as well. This sounds like something my Greatgrandfatther and Grandfather would say. I just love being alone in my home with my pets, I am so very content now and no longer feel the need to socialize as much. When I go to the grocery store I always compliment one person in the isle weather its some ladies hair or beer a man is buying, I reach out as we never know it may be their or our last day. I also engage the store clerk and thank them for working. This is now my routine and my social acquaintanc-ing (new word) ;) xo

[@caligirllala1267]

This video is going to prove to be invaluable to my teen daughter who is an introvert and just wants to be in a cottage doing art and living with her cats…just like you!!!! I can’t wait to show her that there’s nothing wrong with her but to embrace this. Thank you Paola!!!😻😻

[@GlassCaskett]

Sounds like me when I was a teen, hope she finds peace and happiness within herself.

[@secretdoorgaming2024]

Your sweet girl sounds like me I am in my 40's now and I was an artist and author but autistic my dream was to live in a cottage with cats and chickens and still is. She is a gem and worth so much love and care. What a dear girl you have. Please tell her this she is special beyond words when those whom wish to escape this world to find peace they are the ones whom shall heal this earth with their kindness and compassion. ❤I know this as truth from God.

[@caligirllala1267]

@@secretdoorgaming2024 😻😻😘😘

[@caligirllala1267]

@@GlassCaskett 😻😻😻

[@FloridaDumpling]

I’m 63, and live in The Villages, Florida - a large retirement community where everyone seems to have tons of friends. I thought to myself, “at last, I can make friends”. But you know what? I came to realize I’m a true loner, and purposely don’t even want any friends. I’m even a bit of a hermit, and am very happy, thank you. I’m never bored, I have too many interests! I don’t need any company, though I do have a wonderful husband. Yet I’m happiest when I’m home alone.

[@dr.gitanjaliupadhaya4044]

That’s so lovely

[@OC-bj5de]

I think when people is older more difficult to find friends. I'm 63 and I never could't find a friend in my enterely life, so I stayed not alone at all, but with myself.

[@charly6052]

Can i get your contact . Need yoi

[@Delarras12]

Me too! Very well put.

[@dianeandries1331]

It is fine, but not the same back ground feeling when one is alone without anyone coming home and thus without a partner. It is not the same

[@Kingleo_31]

I’m an introvert and I much prefer spending time alone than with people I don’t even know or like. When I’m alone, I can appreciate the quiet, peaceful moments more than with a room full of loud, annoying strangers.

[@tzone5951]

If there’s one good thing that has come of KZbin, it’s that I’ve finally found kindred spirits in the world that are like me. I always thought I was alone in wanting solitude and not having friends.

[@allyeee]

Yes it makes me feel although I’m alone and ok with this path. I am not lonely ❤

[@nureinherz]

there are real people in the outside world, too, that are kindred spirits to you. Find them and make real life friends, the internet can be a nice space, but it isn't the real life

[@samanthahunt3105]

Thank you for helping to normalize those of us that are quiet and need time alone. I was once called mute as a child by a mean boy at school. Not many understand what it was like.

[@Selen304]

I know this feeling. I was, all of my childhood, labeled as mute, quite.

[@operacionanaconda]

I am 25 and I can say I've never had a real friend. I've been completely lonely (socially) for the last 13 years of my life since I've started to isolate myself (but no one of my 'friends' seemed to care) because of the bullying I suffered by most of my classmates (who I know since we were 3 years old). So every time I saw on Instagram how people that I considered my friends through my life (they don't) have fun, and goes on holidays together and many more it's just broke my heart. It's been so hard to learn how to love and appreciate being by myself, this kind of channels helps s lot when you have no one to talk to or feel down. That's why you are so special Paola, thank you for your videos, for being soo nice with us, for being like a friend for me although we don't know each other. Simply thank you. ❤️❤️❤️

[@bravewarrior862]

I've experienced the same exact thing man I now turning 25 this coming June, I've been bullied/hurt in my freshman year in high school I think that's so I decided to isolate myself ever since,

[@Lost-ir6bq]

Hello! i wish you to find someone like you 🙏🏻

[@karthikeyank8815]

I can relate to you.

[@chorva-]

🧡

[@lulafaye5670]

Hello I hope you are doing well. I've been through similar struggles. I was diagnosed at 29 with conditons that made me just not my old self. I thought I had a couple real true friends "quality over quantity" and perhaps I'd be ok having a support system and true friends.. but as soon as i was an inconvenience and not capable of what i was before they threw me away and replaced me with healthy happy new friends. Still no one to talk to going through this whole journey of brain tumor and infertility alone but becoming stronger. Sometimes think if it had been the C word they wouldnt have left me but probably wrong amd just would have used me for sympathy and to just look nice.

[@GuaduSanz]

It’s my first time in your channel and I found out that you are very relatable for me. I also grew up in a military family, moving from place to place and I’m super socially awkward since childhood. Now living in the mountains as yourself, with a very similar lifestyle. Thank you for making me feel validated!💕

[@SweetThing]

I am very loyal to my friends, but I expect my friends to be loyal to me as well and most of them fail that time and time again. I find that quality in friends is more important than quantity.

[@MsBteddy]

Yes.

[@kaitlinmeadows6273]

Being quiet and cozy in one’s own company, with our animal, book, and garden fairy friends is such a richly populated universe of friends. Blessings for a beautiful winter solstice season.

[@goldenlight2518]

After 40 years of struggling with accepting myself, I have realized that the only friendship that we truly need is with our true Self. If we can love dearly who we are without compromise, we will never feel alone and all else will fall into place in any way it must.✨🕊️🎶☀️🙏

[@dr.gitanjaliupadhaya4044]

Totally connect with you

[@angelagrimes8237]

Dear Paola. It’s is almost a year later since you posted this. And your story mirrors my own. Thank you for sharing your truth. It is beautiful to be validated by your story.

[@queenbee3647]

Nothing wrong with being a quiet person. 😁 My daughter is a librarian with Aspergers. One of her personality traits is preferring her own company. The characters in the books she reads and care for are enough for her. To each their own. 💖

[@mickzammit6794]

I'm 72 and think that the longer you're alive the more you wish you had never met most of the people you did meet. Quiet places near running water and all types of animals are more my thing. It's the world at large that wants you to feel lonely so you can join the large loud crowd of shallow people who seek the bright light and noise to avoid reality. Feel alone but don't feel lonely.

[@PraveenSrJ01]

I’m 39 going on 40 years old and feel the same way. Feel like I’ve been on this planet 🌍 for a long time now.

[@julie-nw6ql]

🙌❣️

[@jensmith9288]

So true. ❤

[@Firzj]

I'm an introvert without any friends. It is like a blessing and a curse at the same time. While you can enjoy silence and peace, you still have to socialize, overcome it to find a job and basically survive 🗿🤔🗿

[@LindaMasihul]

I find it so draining to talk to your not so type of people but you have no choice because of so called Work 😔

[@gardnep]

It is lonely without my best friend, I just lost her in June, I don’t know what lay ahead for a 70 year old. I rarely make friends and don’t know where to start. Keep safe CF, thanks for your channel. Glad you had a great birthday.

[@ib4038]

I never had friends and it was not by choice. I accepted being alone, but it was painful as a younger person. Now, I am thankful for the family I have and the one or two friends that come along in my 50s.

[@pocketofbangtan3595]

Wow her voice feels like a therapy. It's charming and calm. I can hear her all day long

[@annietapia2340]

I'm so introverted (and an empath) that writing a comment here was something I still had to force myself to do. If not for that book "Quiet" which I happened to purchase a few months back but haven't gotten the chance to read it yet due to toxicity at work. Thank you for sharing all that you do, Paola. I so get you and your journey as it had been mine as well while growing up, and still is. I had been a subscriber since 2020 but had remained silent 99% of the time. But I've loved you and your content from the very first time I came across it (literally when you just started). I love the peace and quiet that surrounds your content/videos; your voice that's so calming for my soul/spirit; your quiet yet soulful background music that both uplifts and weirdly saddens me at times; your life's simplicity yet bountiful that's inspiring to those who prefer the sidelines and live quietly yet meaningfully. Your being an introvert yet able to put yourself out in the world with your videos is something so courageous and bold. So inspiring. Keep it up, Paola. God bless!

[@MiriamLove366]

I'm the same way. I've realized a lot of people I follow on you tube are also introverted

[@ucheuguru4084]

I've been alone for a really long time but my society makes me think there's something missing in my life.

[@kristinLB]

Society is just a bunch of made up rules and ideas other ms created as “normal”. I’ve never cares about most of that. But it is hard to break the sort of brainwashing. That’s why it’s nice to see videos like this. I also love watching slow living videos.

[@faiththrower7951]

Agreed

[@semperfi6801]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you; it is a society that is missing the point. Your solitude is your strength and no amount of society can replace or provide you the strength you need in life.

[@paratrooper73]

Sounds like they are the one who are codependent. And don't even see it. That's how far robotic they become.