I’m Afraid to Move Forward, What Do I Do?

[@JJnnaatt]

"We live life on autopilot and the destination is the avoidance of negative emotions at all costs" Great quote

[@ibrahimadia3642]

💪🏾❤️

[@dethkon]

The plane ride always ends in a catastrophic crash. This is unavoidable. Knowing this, avoiding nihilism seems to be the most important problem (for me, anyway).

[@krisboi6396]

Hey! Kris here. I was the guy in the video! I greatly appreciate HG for having me in this call as it provides me a much more needed insight and understanding on how to really critically think about my situation. I felt so cognitively biased a month before uni that I forgot the basic & fundamental things to do when I'm in a thought loop or catastrophizing. I was reminded by dr.K to question my conclusions and challenge them with new insights by talking, reading, or listening to new resources. Because of that, I get to get back to a better mode of thinking so that I can propel myself forward better. So, thank you HG and dr.K. Thank you to the comment section for being so lovely. It brightens my day knowing that a lot of people validate my idea of changing career paths. I also had a laugh here where one guy said that I sounded like an Indian Tech scammer. Loved it! I also wanted to give you guys an update on my Psych uni situation as well. I've gone to uni for a week and it feels like the best week of my life (so far). I get to ask questions about the field that I love to the heroes without capes that we call psychologists and they're my lecturers as well (isn't that the loveliest thing that a person can have? Imagine being surrounded by your heroes day in and out AND you get to have conversations with them!). I get to use the knowledge from uni to that side project that I've been doing for a few months and surprisingly it helped a lot more people that I expected. I was learning about existentialism and a human's value structure and navigated a conversation with a couple of people where they felt like they didn't have any self worth, turns out I helped them a lot. I get to be in a space where everyone is so welcoming and heartwarming and I've made much more meaningful friends in a week than I've ever made in my life (well excluding a few people here and there). I gotta say that changing careers was the best decision I've ever made in my life. It made me feel like I'm in my skin again and I get to sing & dance on the way to uni to meet my heroes. Most importantly, I get to say "I'm proud of you" to the mirror every night before bed and wake up in the morning feeling that I'm gonna make it in life. Thank you for providing me a place to be heard and to (unintentionally) help other people in youtube with similar things that I'm going through. Loveliest wishes, KrisBoi

[@txcangel]

Thats great to hear man :D i believe in you as well! :)

[@Rynntastic01]

It's so heartwarming to hear that you're doing better Kris. I have a feeling you'll make a fine therapist especially since it's something that you value so greatly :D Listening to this interview actually sounds like my situation several years ago (taking engineering in school to make my parents proud). Last year I changed schools and I'm finally doing something that's fulfilling to me (art/animation!) Despite the difficulties getting here, it's not a decision I imagine I'll regret soon.

[@sety409]

I'm amazed that you said you have trouble understanding native english speakers. You're clear and concise. Maybe it's more about the cultural differences, and the implications and context of certain statements.

[@NeIIy]

From a third year marketing student who also dreads this field: ROCK ON KRIS IM ROOTING FOR YOU!!

[@rockinmoonful]

Semangat Kris! Jadi psikolog yang hebat yak siapa tau ada yang mau jadi pasien lo nanti abis nonton ini wkwk

[@WovenPsychology]

This guy spoke with such clarity and awareness. He was emotionally in tune and wasn't too afraid of the shame/guilt/unknown. He seems like he will be a great therapist :)

[@marcelogarza1470]

X2

[@pandax5359]

Oh Kris. Yea I spoke with him a bunch of times. He's really cool man. I honestly believe he will be great. I speak to him every week. I shared the same dream as him but now I'm not sure if it's the right place for me. But just letting yall know he seems to be doing pretty great right now!

[@jeevieseverino3949]

That marketing experience sure pays off towards his next career.

[@mrs.quills7061]

And his English is really good! I’m a native speaker and understood everything really well. I know he was worried about that, but he’s thoughtful and understands the language.

[@Bendilin]

"You're my hero." "Okay."

[@newchangeunlisted_viewer5594]

Fr 💀 Called him buddy And then said that

[@msamuelw]

Tbh, I like the formatting of the video without cuts. I feel like the awkward pauses makes it easier to sense the emotion and the importance of it all. More importantly, it gives me a little time to process and reflect for myself. But damn yo this video hits me hard.

[@GrifMoNeY]

Agreed, the conversation felt unnaturally smooth, and the length of time it takes to digest a statement is information that the editing removes.

[@Fullyautomagic]

@@TIOLIOfficial this one has tons of cuts

[@Chazzmatazz]

His last 5 years were not "wasted". It creates insights into business building and gives him advantages in building his therapy business when he has the relevant credentials to start. Also, he can position himself to serve high-value clients (business leaders) as a result of his experience working with these individuals in a marketing capacity.

[@monroeka7565]

This ^

[@saturationstation1446]

"business leaders" lol

[@modernman1240]

Yup

[@tikaishuman]

Oh damn, i got emotional when dr k said “one day a 22 yo is gonna come into your office saying they work in marketing and they hate it”.. im also an indonesian who is passionate about mental health and want to study psychology in my late 20s, and ALSO was in marketing… the thought of that is so endearing and is really why i want to do this 🥺🥺

[@JazzEKeez]

"That which is to give light must endure burning." -Victor Frankl

[@Kaythought]

I really needed to listen to this. I was just about to finish my degree in marketing, when I realized that I wanted to help people. I wanted to train service dogs to help people. After applying to 20-30 service dog organizations I found one. It was over 1,000 miles from home, but I moved. Changing the course of my life has been the best move I’ve ever made. When you’re young your world is so small, it’s okay to change course.

[@woodsofchaos]

Will it pay enough?

[@deadinside8781]

That's amazing! How's it going?

[@moonchild-uh9uc]

as an indonesian, i have the same hope about psychology, whether its the awareness or the therapy service. i told my sister that in the future a psychologist will be much more needed than they are now, because seeing the younger generation, we are more aware of mental health than our parents do.

[@bimajuantara]

Yep agreed. I feel like we're in a desperate needs of good mental health services here. Went to psychologist once and all I got was "just pray harder", lol. Thanks I guess. Definitely a 10/10 experience.

[@terrodactyll]

@@bimajuantara whatever psychologist you've went to, they're doing a terrible job

[@adamh4h4]

@@terrodactyll Its pretty a normal thing in Asia from what I've seen, experienced and heard in over 10 years. Even me personally during my suicidal years had TERRIBLE psychologists and would rather just give you the meds and go home. Overall impression was the docs never cared. Basically, a vibe of that person not caring if you died now or tomorrow. That caring vibe / "energy" / whatever you wanna call it is non-existent. I get that caring vibe more from strangers + homeless people than I get with some doctors. Asia is in DIRE help .

[@darkcreatureinadarkroom1617]

@@adamh4h4 I wonder if your docs could have also been overworked and starved for resources and it's not that they don't care, but that they don't have the mental bandwidth to care? It wouldn't be such a rare story. In any case, that speaks about the same dire need for mental help professionals Asia has that you all mentioned. I hope you are doing better now!

[@KitsCloud]

After years of battling with my mental health, I finally feel like I'm getting somewhere. I found out I often struggle making decisions due to my childhood, and I almost felt like a robot, waiting for instructions, standing still if none were given. Obviously since I am an adult, those instructions didn't ever come. I recently found out that I didn't really know what I wanted to do? All this time I thought I did, but it was what my parents instilled in me. It took me a long time, but I think I finally found what I want to do but I know heavily struggle with finding the "right time" to apply for jobs. I basically feel like I need a roadmap that doesn't exist, if that makes sense. And so I can't take that step forward.

[@xFearilx]

I'm interested to hear more about this. Could you expand on it? I feel like I am in the same situation myself, stuck in a "robot" state, waiting for instructions. Feels like I struggle with making decisions myself and moving forward. I'm constantly wondering what do and what I want in life but I can't come up with any answers. I have daily job but other than that I'm often stuck procrastinating for the rest of the day. I noticed it's easier to do stuff when others give me "instructions", such as work related stuff.

[@Tots314]

I resonate with this so much; is there any way you could expand on how you discovered what you truly believe you want to do? I've been waiting for the roadmap for way too long and I feel stuck even though I know that the roadmap does not exist.

[@KitsCloud]

I'm not saying this applies for everyone, but this is what my situation is / was like. My parents are very loving, although have always worried about me way too much, sheltering me to the point where they wouldn't let me "explore the world" on my own. They decided everything for me. When I do stuff, I have the urge to ask them "can I?" instead of telling them "I'm going to", despite being 22. And I feel like this bleeds into the rest of my life, seeking validation from others like my friends. Everyone has always considered me to be the "computer kid" and so in my mind I was like "well, it makes sense I'm going to study IT then", but I never factored into it that I didn't really enjoy it. I thought I did. Maybe? Idk. I recently realized this, and have been trying to find out who I am exactly as weird as that sounds. I've always been who the people around me wanted me to be, people pleaser to the max kinda lol. Now that I'm trying to find my *own* direction in life, I have to do it myself. Nobody else knows what I want of course. But obviously this means no more "you need to do this, then this, then this". And I struggle with that. I feel like I need a roadmap or a step by step guide on how to do xyz because all I know is being told what to do. I can't do stuff, or better put I don't know where to start? Like I feel motivated but I feel like I need someone to guide me to step 1, and then I can follow the ladder to step 20 on my own from there. This goes for big things like looking for a job, but even when playing games I'll be googling for hours before I start. I press New Game, and a screen pops up: "choose your difficulty". I'll look up what to choose lmao. 3 classes to choose? Better look at Reddit and see what people say I should choose. Anyways! The way I found something I might like is honestly by doing stuff I was embarrassed of doing. I'm a thinker and I have so many thoughts I want to write down. So I thought I wanted to write stories. Browsing through experiences of other people writing stories, I found out that there's more jobs in writing than just novel writing. I love talking about the things I watch or play, and I love writing, so when I found out there's journalism that covers that I thought "that's what I want to try". And like I said, I have no idea what step 1 is. But I'm doing things like making a portfolio by writing, and that feels good even though if I'm not sure it's necessarily the right thing to do. I hope that explained it a bit? I know this was very long. I hope y'all are doing well, you got this! Don't give up looking because you never know when you might discover something.

[@dominiknistl6046]

find someone who achieved what you want in your dreams and model them

[@xFearilx]

@@KitsCloud I cant believe I find it so relatable. Overprotective mom and asking for permission, yep. Been computer kid, done IT uni while hating it. Choosing class in a game thing is also something I can relate as well, need to ask others. Feels like I need to know everything about the subject before making a decision. Whenever's there a decision that doesn't have clear answer and all answers are correct I freeze up and rather not choose anything (like picking a car color, I'd rather not buy a car, than have to go through hell of picking one option). Same goes for shopping, exploring every possible variant is so exhausting that I rarely buy anything for myself.

[@Splunktopus]

Editing cuts: I appreciate that there is a demand for faster-digesting content. But I think speeding through these conversations sacrifices the moments of reflection and engagement.

[@michaelwiko2384]

Took me about half an hour to think if I should post this cause it's my first time commenting, but here we go.. As an Indonesian that studies IT cause my parents did not approve my passion of psychology, it's really interesting to see someone like Chris here taking risks that in the will fulfil his life. Sharing for a bit: Yes, my experiences also comes with guilt when taking other major except IT due to financial stability. But, my passion in psychology still stay intact and I'm happy that my daily life consist of psychological experiences (positive or negative). This passion weirdly maneuvers towards my study and daily life. Ex: UI UX Design, Human-computer interaction (HCI), research, got the opportunity to take 2 electives consist of psychology subject (yes it is an eye-opening experiences), part-time artist, etc. At least it opens up to new possibilities to test out. In the end of the day, still prefer taking psychology as my major tho and kinda have regrets :)). But am I sad now? Not really. Am I going to take psychology as a major one day? Probably :). Like Dr K said there's no way to know what the future will be and mistakes can be learned. I even met my now gf cause I met my friend while studying IT, covid hits, online study, playing too much Valorant, he invites her to the party, chatting and calling and voila :D Ramblings aside, there will be ups and downs in our life and we have to keep learning about life cause it's too random to know what happens next. Idk if this is Dharma but it feels like it. So, keep your journey alive yall. I also hope that Indonesia also puts values and opens up the topic of psychology even wider.

[@michaelwiko2384]

@@Chi-np2lz Thanks for the tip :)👌

[@cassiepius6267]

I actually feel really jealous that he knows what he want or rather a direction to take. I feel like a rudderless dinghy feeling unfulfilled but not having any idea about what i want or which direction to go.

[@patricklapinski1526]

I feel the same, and it feels like the more i try to figure it out i become even more unsure and feel even worse about myself

[@danielngaihte5885]

I remember feeling that way. For me my solution came to make up vision boards with 5 year plans

[@pandax5359]

Yea it's really difficult to find our own directions...

[@foofs2721]

take career personality test, MBTI helps me alot too. give it a try and ask question to yourself. you can do it!

[@gj4312]

When Dr K. takes us through his thought process off the cuff, damn is that impressive. Not necessarily the content itself (which is quite impressive) but how quickly he can list of such concise points parallel to his conversational thinking. I'm a maths student and quite a good one but try to engage me in that shit while I'm having to listen to someone and empathise with them, hell no. Having a professor is all I can do where that is concerned. Even then I want to politely tell them to fuck off and leave me to my maths.

[@marcusmiro2171]

I kinda experienced that about 4 years ago when I decided to drop out a mechanical engineering degree in Brazil to come to the USA to study exercise science/strength & conditioning. I got out a career (which in Brazil is becoming saturated but still pays well) to study something I love in a completely different country. It was a tough decision and I had to convince my mom, which as any mom from a “third world country” was not really happy with it, but I was so determined so comprehend and supported me. Now, three years since I’m in the USA, I believe it was probably the best decision I had even with the struggles because I’m becoming more independent/responsible everyday and I outperform most people around since I have a strong will and focus on what I’m doing. I’m not telling to drop everything you have to pursuit ur dreams, but if you have the conditions and the will to do it, go for it, because the path is gonna be hard but doing what you love will make it more enjoyable.

[@lalakuma9]

I'm also Indonesian (who grew up and live abroad) and a part of why I'm always afraid to return is because of the conservative culture and ignorance of issues like mental health. This guys has a lot of balls to want to make a difference. Much props to you my dude, you should be proud of yourself.

[@mirusbhergh]

I like the faster, clipped together format inasmuch as I watch all these videos and 3x speed anyway, but it also misses a lot of the personality that I've come to love in the Dr. K videos. It feels more like a news broadcast and less like a conversation. Something to think about as far as brand identity goes.

[@ash486]

Yeah the editing feels "sharp" and quiet jarring and inorganic. And lot of it feel unnecessary like they only save a couple of seconds here and there but take a lot away

[@trent797]

I also was a little distracted by the editing. Sometimes moments of silence are very insightful and also good for the listener.

[@ferociousfly8509]

I see what you're missing but my non-medical ADHD spirals away from the video in the little quiet moments, its too much to not slip away thinking about usually... especially when it explains my emotions, confronts my identity and strains the limit of my intellect in one sentence. I pause these videos a lot and often stop watching part way through to come back later. Im scared of being healthy, understanding what it takes to move forward is daunting. And I find myself reuminating on his every word when he takes that moment to think and its not easy to stop when I start. Didnt even notice the cuts until I read the comments... Back to the video!

[@ryancxe]

Start with one step. After that you wait until you are brave enough to take another step. Courage is a muscle and each step will get easier and easier as it the muscle gets stronger. Same concept as exposure therapy. Good luck facing your fears handsome people 😊

[@enwe6487]

I wish my brain wouldn’t link each step to one another and if I‘m not taking all at once (which wouldn’t even be hard for other people - it’s mostly NOT doing things instead of doing them), I can’t do any incrementally. And I‘ll never have the courage to do them all at once, although that’s what I‘m thinking about 24/7 🥺🙆🏻‍♀️

[@ryancxe]

@@enwe6487 I think you overestimate how easy it is for other people! Just by the fact that they can take those steps shows that they have taken smaller steps that have built them up to be able to take that step. If you want to be able to do what they do, you need to start with the biggest step that YOU can manage, the alternative is to never have the chance to take those bigger steps. Your comment indicates that you need to break down your goals into even smaller steps that you can approach without it seeming daunting. Happy to chat more if I can help more! 😇

[@enwe6487]

@@ryancxe It‘s probably mostly brain chemistry and I‘d guess most people haven’t literally taught their brains to jump from one dopamine hit to the next, so even taking the smallest one is so scary to that primal part of my brain even while knowing it is objectively a doable thing, I did much harder things I life but they didn’t grow into such nerve wrecking all-day-bandwidth-consuming-topics, just thinking about it makes it engage in all the other habits even more. That‘s the crux to me at least - tackling one is so hard because I know it‘ll put focus on the others - and some of the are more than detrimental. But leaving it all as it it, the compound makes them quite detrimental too. It‘s like..you‘re in a maze and need to get out, but there’s a timer, you’re running out of time of with each second passing, a new wall shoots up so that finding a path gets exponentially harder. This must sound very cryptical lol, it‘s 4 in the morning here and sleeping is probably the best idea now 🙃 Also, yea sure, I‘d love to chat but I never did. via youtube, so I have no idea how it works lol

[@Rhythm162.]

This hit so close to home, I think this is one of my favorite interviews, thank you Chris for speaking out, it's really helpful for the rest of us too, Goodluck on whatever ventues you go out to do!

[@DDD_Tinker]

Although I understand the jumpcuts are for better retention rates, I personally feel like it doesn't give me time to process what Dr. K and the patient said The pauses I feel were a great breather, to learn and internalize the information Tho if it helps the channel, I think I can work my wait around it loll just don't want to pause a lot to think about what doctor k. Said loll Ps. After a while it feels overwhelming loll

[@ChipInDip]

Definitely agree. It’s a pretty different feel, but if it helps the channel grow, it might be the better style. I like the pauses though

[@Seelen_]

It definitely feels too fast and overwhelming. Probably gonna start watching the vods instead of the youtube videos.

[@91722854]

marketing is to manipulate people to buy things they don't need, and marketing degree is to manipulate students to think they are not manipulating people to buy things those people don't need

[@SF-op5ix]

Marketing is helping people find what they were already looking for. If it’s manipulation, it’s not ethical.

[@saturationstation1446]

he doesnt even know the bad parts of marketing yet and he is already disgusted by the nature of it lol. most of it is about manipulating children more than adults too. at least the actual jobs IRL are more about brainwashing kids. the classes might not be upfront about that part but thats how it gets applied in the real world

[@excalibro8365]

@@SF-op5ix 99% of marketing in practice is manipulation. The goal is literally to get as many people as possible to buy your product.

[@schmooplesthesecond5997]

as somebody from indonesia. i can confirm that its hard to find good psychologist and psychiatrist here. i wouldnt be here watching dr k otherwise

[@inshadowforever]

I hate the mini cuts all the time to remove the silence and make it seem like they talk really fast. Please don't do that.

[@jusi1993]

This video would likely be twice as long. I do like it very much, please continue.

[@YewJackOSRS]

I like this style of editing in the shorter vids where Dr. K is just straight teaching, but something about it being done with a call feels off. Like the pacing is too fast. I as a viewer don't have time to digest what either person is saying fully. I actually thought I was listening to this on 1.5x speed or something initially until I paid more attention and saw the cuts lol. I wonder if anyone else has this same feeling when watching this.

[@SemekiIzuio]

I prefer the full uncensored version with both sides not just Dr. K. So yes I dont like these versions

[@doppel33]

This edition wasn’t terrible but I prefer the full version, I guess I can go to twitch to watch the vod without cuts.

[@kingfisher9553]

Perfect timing. Headed in a new direction, getting lots of encouragement from possible partners, like it, but literally shaking with nervousness after recent conference with supporter (which went amazingly). Was wondering why I was such a nervous wreck when I left -- since it went amazingly. Now I know.

[@nootnoot8174]

Note or whoever edited this video, it was very difficult for me to watch because literally all of the silence in between them talking was cut out so it’s constant words with no time to process and an all-around unnatural feeling

[@kaphel]

Since 2018, I was often scared to do things outside for starting to construct my life, but in 2022, i realized the fact if i play adventure games, it means i love to travel, and that helped me a lot to overcome that feeling.

[@GosuKitten]

The cuts to the content seem so rushed and running over each other. I really enjoyed the slower pace of a natural conversation that these usually have. It really sucks cuz this reminds me much more of rushed TikTok content that I specifically avoid cuz it messes with my focus and stimuli seeking. I'm really hoping this isnt a permanent change to the content :< Dr. K has always been a safe space away from that rush, and I hope that isn't just gone now.

[@GrayBlood1331]

I agree, letting the moment breathe is subtlety important.

[@RebelOfTheWorld]

So that last bit "don't let shame get in the way of moving towards what you care about"... How do we do that?

[@Federico-1]

I’m 22 and just had my first day back in school in a few years. I’m probably going to be in school for the next 3-4 years. In 10 years i’ll be better off than i would be if i wasn’t going back to school but i’m still dramatically behind where i “should” be today. I think most people would say since i have this opportunity, it’s good that i’m taking it. If you relate to this you should go back too, you can do it. How behind i am is going to eat at me for the next half decade but I don’t think it will after that.

[@personmcdudeguy]

I know how hard it is to have these expectations of yourself that you can never go back and change. I don't have the answers either. But I can say we are often our harshest critics, and most other people are proud of us for getting back on our feet.

[@Skizzeckz]

After my childhood dog of 15 years dying in my hands yesterday I think it's safe to say I'm comfortable with the thought of moving forward. But I sure as shit will miss him and remember him everyday for the rest of my life. That and I will never take life, friends and family for granted ever again. I hope some of you realize this before you have to lose something dear to you.

[@serumser1]

Sorry for your loss, Darien. I hope you are doing well. Stay strong

[@Robert-vk7je]

I just read the title, but I already have a solution: Step one: Turn around! Step two: Move backwards!

[@Idk_bro12340]

and now you are just goin backwards smh

[@dusk5956]

Technically, if you turn around and take a step FORWARD. It’s still forward? I know this doesn’t help lol

[@MegaAndres55]

To the guy that was in the video: I don't know if you will ever see this but I wish you luck in whatever you want to do with your life. You'll do great in whatever you choose, so I wish you the best. From what I've seen in this video I got that you're really smart, thoughtful, and that you really cared about other people, I think you'd be a great therapist.

[@for_your_entertainment]

I'm 28 and am in my second semester of community college getting my general education done before transferring. Coincidentally, studying psychology to become an LPCC, eventually earning my PhD in Clinical Psychology once my children are more grown. We all move at our own pace. Be proud you're taking action and choosing a career that will fulfill you and give you a positive purpose.

[@gfif36]

gj on that 1 mil people. that aoe healing reaches some digits.

[@yeahhbui1]

Love your videos Dr. K, but I like the old editing style of the videos better. It gave me time to think and digest the topics/questions.

[@ZebrazRus]

i was just watching ur channel last night at 999K and now its 1M so congrats!! i remember following u in 2019 when my mental state was so low and saw ur Reckful vid. anyway, you've helped so many of us and counting. Thank you for all you do!!!

[@Chizypuff]

Comment for the editing person/team I don't know what the viewership stats are obviously but I'm not in love with the 100% jump cut conversation. It works for tiktok/clips/shorts but for a 30 minutes to an hour long video I think the pauses are part of the content -cause it's a conversation, not a lecture.

[@xzanmatouyojinbo4723]

Congratz to 1 million subscribers. Keep up the marvelous work! :)

[@mariannerichard1321]

Having a marketing formation before getting into the psychology might be quite the sleek move, actually. Sure it is challenging to be in such young field in your country, but with proper marketing, your chances to place yourself early in a growing market could turn you into a major player 20 years down the line. And all that by actually helping people.

[@simplysheiks]

This resonated with me. I’ve worked in social services since 2015, I’m good at my job, but I know in my heart that it’s no longer for me, but Im afraid to move forward. I started studying for a nursing program admissions test and I studied for a month and gave up. I talk myself out of things and I hate it. Years ago, I was such a risk taker and I believe it’s past failures that’s causing the inaction. Idk I feel stuck. Im at a point where I don’t even know what I want anymore and I’m so apathetic now ugh

[@MAKAWELI187]

You probably got the wrong friends, but got your heart the right place, follow it.

[@andreeaiancu5290]

I feel for you, Chris. I am in a similar situation. I am 26. I left my country and came to the Netherlands to study. And I am in the middle of my Marketing bachelor. I have been struggling for years with my mental health, depression and anxiety because I have put so much pressure on myself to finish it and get a job and become financially stable. However, more and more I feel that this is not for me. I have the same idea that I don't want to have a job where I am manipulating people into buying things. It feel so drainging, but I have the pressure of my family and people around me to finish it. I have been very interested in psychology for 2 years now and the more I think of starting over again with another study, the scarier it gets, because what if I fail this too. This video really made me see things in a different perspective and I am going to start psychology. Simply, the idea of helping people already gives me so much fulfilment compared to what I am studying now. Thank you so much for this video and for all the others. I am grateful for people like you🧚🏻‍♂️

[@standreamcatcher2371]

This helped me so much. I started a career I didnt wanted out of guilt as well, trying to make my mom proud, but that didnt fix anything. I felt like I wasnt even in control of my own life and that make me feel powerless and dumb. The fact that Im now starting psychology also is like taking some steps back from where I was before, but I feel better, I feel in control and fulfill, like I could actually enjoy working as a psychologist. Im still really scared and trying to work the fact that, from what I have heard on this sesion, Im feeling like this because Im disappointed in myself, but I hope I can work on it cause how am I gonna help people when I feel like I cant help myself. I really hope everything works out well for this guy aswell

[@who_cares.st02]

I hope the best for his future! You will do great as a therapist👍

[@trent797]

I liked the video, but I didn't need every millisecond of silence edited out. Sometimes the listener needs time to reflect too.

[@Nala.bell_621]

didnt like all the jumpcuts, felt like i was missing a bunch. Great conversation!

[@intolasthit6030]

I don't think I like the editing. I like to see the pauses, I like to see "let me think for a second", the facial expression during the silent part. Pauses between sentences are important too.

[@serumser1]

youtube friendly, probably

[@kylespevak6781]

Reminds me of a story I heard from a guy who went to Vietnam. He met two guys who were barely scraping by, but happy struggling since they enjoyed their job making documentaries. The same day, he met this much older man who had wealth and was enjoying retirement. That man decided to work towards having a happy retirement, where the other guys decided to be happy in the present. Two valid perspectives, two very different ways of life

[@robby7573]

As a fellow Indonesian, I gotta say I have a lot of respect and admiration of Chris' dream and what he had done.

[@miggy4mayor]

Congrats on 1 mill Dr K and the team! Also, there's a typo in the thumbnail. It should be 'uNknown'.

[@saturationstation1446]

from around the start, it sounded like just communicating with people who have higher vocabularies would help a lot. dont be afraid to look up words you dont know yet. it sounds like you'll absorb the info very well since you are personally invested in learning about the way people feel

[@kornel9093]

imo, an indonesian with that level of fluency and articulation (not just in spoken english, but expression in general) will go far in life. that dude is a "rare breed."

[@Fallicacy]

AHHH I JUST WANT TO WORK A SHITTY RETAIL JOB AND LIVE ALONE WHY DOES LIVING COST SO MUCH WHY DO I HAVR TO BE SO SKILLED AND INVESTED INTO MY JOB JUST TO LIVE ALONE

[@stoborking]

I am so glad this person called in, I am going through a similar thing as him and hearing Dr K and talk through this really helped.

[@bills1967]

Thanks for making this video! I have been dealing with this video for a while and the past couple of months I have been scared but I have been going forward.

[@Coziest777]

34:11 "We think we're doing the right thing in life because we don't feel bad about it"

[@instantpug7036]

what in the fresh hell are these jump cuts oh my god i‘m s c r e a m i n g this is literally raising my anxiety levels

[@Alesanascreamokid]

Can you please not cut the video constantly when there is a silent moment, keep it in!! Its so valueable!❤

[@cihad735]

Your timing's are just wonderful. I just finished a degree in physics and am switching to psychology. I have very similar concerns as Chris here. Let's hope that I'll manage this change financially. I wish you a lot of luck too, Chris!

[@silviaflores791]

😊DR K...THE ENDING MADE ME CRY...IT WAS LIKE THE MESSAGE WAS JUST FOR ME🥰

[@pencilcheck]

we all need to be humble and I am glad both sides are showing that, however I am still awed at how Dr K can be this calm when talking about stuff. I have a feeling a lot of people if they listen to this, they will call him stupid and idiotic. And that will cause him more depression and cause more mental problems. I think we all can take away from both sides in this video, one is about being candid about their feelings and seek help and get things fixed and the other side is a good listener and will not jump to conclusion immediately.

[@cyzeal]

As a non-native English speaker the fast cuts in this video made it harder for me to listen and reflect on what's being said, even tho I'm quite fluent in English. I always really appreciated the natural pauses that were left in previous videos.

[@KTSamurai1]

it's amazing that someone as well-spoken as this has been made to feel like his grasp of the language was bad, to the point where he was genuinely worried that he wouldnt understand his future patients if he was successful in becoming a psychologist

[@helo218]

I feel like the editing cutting the pauses and everything takes away a bit, in the sense that loosing the natural pace of the conversation doesn’t allow me to reflect about the sentences the same way (dr K’s as well as the other person). You have to pause the video which isn’t so agreable imo I get that we’re in a tiktok era but what I loved about those long videos was that we could go deep into it even while tidying cooking or smth (because when you tidy things up in ur environment it helps sorting your mind right?) I liked getting the essence of the conversation while listening to the conversation ^^ And I feel like if people wanted it to be faster they could increase the speed of the video

[@maxintime_]

As an Indonesian and is still living in Indonesia, mental health problems are definitely not given enough attention here. I have to work hard to convince my parents that I needed therapy because of the amount of stigma from the people in my life who tells me that I just need to be strong, that I just need to be mentally stronger as if all my problems are my fault and going to therapy means I'm weak. I have to deal with that mentality for the longest time even now I still have that mindset sometimes. It shows how bad it is here.

[@maxintime_]

Also the disappointing your parents thing is so relatable

[@doireallyhaveto9238]

Cutting all of Dr. K's pauses REALLY bugs me. Suddenly, I have trouble following his point and processing it.

[@TheNeku123]

I like that the video is trying to make a compact version of the stream, but at least add some room for silence. The sudden cuts are distracting.

[@MrArtem1201]

Man, what are all these cuts? Like, why? To ramp up the pace a bit? I'd really prefer the no-cut version

[@Emheartssunshineandsaltwater]

Congrats on 1M!

[@XxjeffersonDkidxX]

34:09 that's straight up just Inside Out. Embracing the sad emotion was the main plot of the movie.

[@viraaj_mehan2288]

Congrats on 1million u deserved it

[@Sqwivig]

I actually despise the jump cuts. Please take them out of the video it ruins the flow of the conversation

[@tehextra3907]

Whoop whoop 1 mil subs, congrats dr k

[@yusefabuissa6685]

Dang what Dr. K said about how there is so much more to learn actually has me considering if it would be rewarding to pursue my desire to be a therapist

[@SomeBody-ce3gq]

Dr K, cutting out the pauses made the video much harder for me to follow 🥺 I don't have time to think about what was said and lost the feel of your conversation. I've watched tons of your previous videos with no problem, please reconsider this editing style!

[@saturationstation1446]

he is not burdening his parents. they might not communicate it to him, but they would much rather see him less wealthy but alive and happy than wealthy, miserable and on the brink of ending things. i always ask people if money suddenly was not an issue for anyone if they would still choose the career they want to go into and if they say yes, i feel confident that they are making the best decision for themselves. so it sounds to me like he is doing the right things tbh, maybe just overanalyzing himself a tiny bit. i hope he knows its a field that is in demand in plenty of other countries if the opportunities arent there where he is now. could always go back at another point in time if necessary

[@nhiavue1]

I don't know if I like the editing cuts. On one hand it makes the video shorter and more straight forward. On the other it feel less like a conversation and rush in a way. Like Dr. K is rushing to help Chris.

[@ezdlc2693]

What's up with the micro-cuts? At first I thought it was some problem with the recording, but it's definitely editing. I did not like it. The conversation needs spaces to breathe.

[@Samblix]

Leaving a job you hate to something you like/love is so much better. I did the same thing, took a pay cut of roughly £4k annually and I am so much happier for it. Money isn't everything, as long as you can pay all your bills and live/support those that you need to support then go for the change!

[@ifsugarman]

he simply loves his parents, and love hurts sometimes, that's all.

[@txcangel]

Please stop using those jumpcuts. They are jarring and unpleasant, thus distracting :)

[@jomalomal]

Lol I didn't realize they got way more aggressive with the editing in this video at first. Thought these two were just cutting each other off constantly 😆

[@Gandellion]

What Dr K was saying about worrying about being able to cook good food when you haven’t even been to culinary school yet did resonate with me, I often think about going into teaching but I’m afraid I won’t be very good at it. But how can I be good at it if I n’a ent actually learned how to do it??

[@salvador8923]

Same, there’s so much stuff I want to learn but I’m too scared I’ll be bad at it. Where’s the logic lmao

[@Gandellion]

@@salvador8923 we are your average flawed humans it would appear

[@hunterpurnell1648]

Typo in the thumbnail? Regardless, thank you Dr. K for your wide array of advice :)

[@LaggyCannon]

Didn't notice till you said it😂uknown

[@midn1ght_sage685]

this gave me hope. i really needed that hope

[@shpalman7]

I drive a Mazda from the year 2000 and it brings me pleasure every time

[@ibeattetris]

Love the video. Just a random question, but did you recently start doing jump cuts? I first noticed it in the habits video, and it's become pretty distracting as of late. The content is still great, but the conversations feel very robotic now.

[@theoryquery]

I kind of wish he talked about societies expectations vs personal ones. Society says you are more successful with more money and power status, but maybe personal success is helping others and having a great relationship with his parents.

[@blindidi0t91]

not a fan of the mid-thought jump cuts but thanks for the good content as always!

[@Whateverhasbeenmynameforyears]

Thinking can be a type of procrastination. Watch that you are not just putting something off when you think you are planning. :)

[@neilthornely9713]

"It's why we use drugs" - except psychedelics which will often make you painfully aware of having made a choice for the wrong reason and highlight to you why you chose a particular action. Most other drugs though yes, definitely agree there's a numbing effect.

[@gabriellaalvarez9890]

Love this doing great work here man!

[@CalebM_]

What I learned: The best thing that will stick with me is when going through a probably similar feeling is that "You know the feeling of [insert a negative emotion here], and knowing that I'll be alright"; Is a relaxing feeling.

[@MelodeathxTed]

I’m guessing that if you feel paralyzed and can’t move forward, you need to deal with something within your character and transform. Death creates rebirth.

[@xXx_Regulus_xXx]

"developmentally appropriate," very useful and concise phrase. gonna use that with my friend who's a new dad

[@neociber24]

If he decide to become a therapist I would really like to know about in 5-10 years

[@SemekiIzuio]

That's such a great idea for Dr.K channel. Just giving them call see how they are doing in life as a follow up. Ofc if they are willing

[@niclyx7970]

One of those weird moments when the KZbin algorithm throws up something related to what I'm currently going thru. I just turned 30 and my dad is asking me to do a Masters in Data Science because I'm not advancing quick enough in my field of IT, a field that I ended up in after failing to get a job in what I went to college for (game design) just to avoid negative emotion. I don't have a passion for programming and the constant need to learn new things all the time is tiring but i'm so afraid of leaving the job. It's also probably my only ticket to move out of my (third world) country. I've asked my mom at least if she thinks I'm a failure and she says no, but both she and my dad think that I've been living my life too aimlessly and that it's time to "get serious" and go do a Masters to continue climbing up those narrow list of approved career paths. Unlike Kris tho I don't have something else that I am passionate about to explore instead.

[@bezdusznyi]

uknown