I'm Clinically Diagnosed With Autism. This Is What I Think

[@anastasiak539]

People really do be out there trying to disprove other people’s autism. My sister was diagnosed with adhd and after some tests it was determined that she was likely on the spectrum as well. One of the administrators at our middle school literally told my mom that my sister couldn’t be autistic because she was able to look him in the eyes. Excuse me, but our dad would literally shout at us all the time to look him in the eye when he was talking. We learned to do it through trauma.

[@ohhmangos]

IKR! My old school said I didn't need a 504 plan. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and undiagnosed inattentive ADHD. The reasoning was "she gets good grades." LIKE WTFFFF

[@alyssahansen1400]

Also just because you don't have one symptom doesn't mean that you aren't autistic.. It isn't a thing where you have to present every symptom or it doesn't count. Autism is known for manifesting in very diverse ways.

[@anastasiak539]

@@alyssahansen1400 exactly. That administrator specifically just had decided my sister was “a bad kid” and did everything he could to make her life harder.

[@thepriceofsalt9003]

i'm so sorry about your dad, my own dad does the same thing but also flies into a rage when my brother and i look at him when he's in a bad mood,,, so that also translates into problems with eye contact in us.

[@toobossforchuck]

@@ohhmangos that kind of happened to me, I was able to get a 504 eventually but they wouldn't let me see the school psychologist unless I had D's and F's....like, I'm supposed to try to fail to get help?? But I got an independent evaluation. Also they are legally required I'm pretty sure to get you a 504 even if you have good grades because you can prove that your educational experience is affected in some way even if it's not grades, you could try reading up on the laws around Fair and Appropriate Education (FAPE), some accommodations that can be used regardless of grades are like, being able to leave class 5 minutes early to get to your next class when the halls aren't crowded/to have time to breathe a little. Education includes all aspects of education not just grades, legally they should be required to reasonably accommodate you I know though that they might be stubborn and not care anyway because they are super super frustrating sometimes :( I'm sorry they've treated you this way Edit: just realized you said your old school, hope your new school is better!!

[@bnicolette14]

I saw a tiktok by an awesome doctor who said that he loves when patients have googled symptoms and have an idea of what could be going on with them. He said he always asks them what they think they have because it might be right and be something he didn't even think of. All doctors should be this way!

[@YaGotdamBoi]

That’s honestly awesome! I wish I had had more doctors like him (I have one now and she’s the first doctor who never shuts me down or judges me or gaslights me), in the past I always just got the “well, go exercise more” when I complained about my endometriosis getting worse or about my weird autoimmune symptoms and joint problems. I’m going to see a therapist for the first time later this month for an ADHD assessment, I really hope he’s like your doctor too, because I need to bring up to him the fact that I believe I have ASD and have RECEIPTS, lol. 💕

[@luana0marquez]

it's what makes the most sense, after all, no one can know what's happening inside your body better than yourself, so it totally should count for something

[@jasmynnetaylor]

I’d never felt as seen as when i had a psychiatrist ask what i thought i had going on. Sucks that he was only part of a partial hospital program, cause i got to see him once and i totally would see him as a primary psych.

[@motherh7372]

@Orléanne Halasz Dr Mike let me down

[@kit10]

@@motherh7372 how

[@marissablack6232]

Most of the time, self-diagnosing is the first step in getting a diagnosis. The healthcare system in the US is very broken. Asking the right questions can help you navigate through the system a bit better

[@KattReen]

Absolutely. You're the only one inside of your head, so if your symptoms aren't very externally obvious it's very important to learn the vocabulary surrounding your particular struggles or symptoms so that you can explore and work on those with mental health professionals. Sometimes it's difficult and takes time. I had "chronic depression" for about 12 years, but it always felt wrong and it took a long time for me to work up the courage to question that diagnosis in the prescence of actual professionals. Turns out I'm actually neurodivergent(ADD). When you're constantly swimming upstream in every aspect of managing your life, it can damage your self-worth and cause a lot of sadness and distress if you don't know WHY you can't handle it when everyone around you seems to be doing those things with ease. So I wasn't struggling because I was depressed, I was depressed because I was struggling against my ADD symptoms to try and live up to a neurotypical standard with no help or understanding from other people. That ADD-diagnosis didn't take away any of my symptoms, but an explanation of what it is that I am dealing with and validating that it IS actually harder for me than the average person did a lot for my self-worth, and now there's a vocabulary to explain to other people what my experience is, and there's resources available that are a better fit for my actual circumstances.

[@marypiper2179]

Especially when you aren’t getting diagnosed as a young child, you have to advocate for yourself

[@marypiper2179]

@@KattReen YES YES YES

[@bananawitchcraft]

I'm AFAB and mixed race from a low-income background. My friend suggested I might be autistic, and at the time I barely knew what autism was, but as soon as I looked it up I was dead certain. So I just kept mentioning it to people as an explanation for my weirdness, until one time a doctor was like "hey do you wanna get that diagnosed" and sent me to a neuropsychologist who finally diagnosed me at 26. Now I have all kinds of assistance after 10 years of slipping through the cracks and being a street person. The only reason I even had health coverage was because I somehow qualified for disability benefits before the diagnosis.

[@trdragon2434]

I just can’t get a doctor to listen to me

[@SarahKey]

I'm a 27 year old woman who was only recently diagnosed. It's hard. I kind of knew I've had for a few years after watching a video about women / girls with autism, but was afraid to talk about it because I didn't want to self diagnose. I hope it gets easier for girls to get diagnosed because it would have helped me so much growing up to get help at a younger age.

[@pugfat]

26 and same situation ❤️

[@sarah3412]

I am 27 years old. I also diagnosed few months ago. My name is Sarah too. Lol. Cool~~ hello!!

[@Rinzler.14]

I know this sounds construed coming from a male Autistic but I really do hope it gets easier for girls to get the help they need because everyone deserves the right to finally to be the real version of themselves and live a happy life even if it means with support, medications or accommodations to achieve that for them.

[@Ktayjacks]

I’m 27. I felt off for so long. The main reason being I never “fit in” socially, and why I had to try so hard to do just that. “Fit in”. I have VERY specific interests, I can’t look my parents and therapist in the eye, but I can with pretty much everyone else. I have a lot more reasons why I’m convinced I am autistic. No one ever brought it up until my therapist suspected I might be months ago. For now, I’m self diagnosed, but I want to be diagnosed clinically to prove like you said, girls need to be diagnosed. And more diagnosticians need to acknowledge autistic women are different than autistic men.

[@thepicklegambit]

Same. I only made the autistic connection about a year or so ago; I’m nearing 29 years old now. I also really pray it gets easier for us women to be spotted at an earlier age, or at the very least, taken more seriously. I never was. I never received the proper help I needed or wanted because no one took me seriously enough and only thought it merely anxiety and depression. Or that I was a lying, lazy drama queen who just couldn’t get it together, or that it was all my mom’s fault for how I turned out. But (and as I’ve heard very similar stories from countless other people on the spectrum) I always personally sensed a lot more was going on beneath the surface. I just would’ve never guessed in a million years that it was autism. Nothing has ever made more sense or been as eye-opening than discovering neurodiversity and finally recognising it in myself. It’s truly the missing puzzle piece I was always grasping at and searching for through years of isolation, social issues, and emotional hardships.

[@nenrit-elijahgreen3571]

I pursued a diagnosis for autism after people including my boyfriend who was autistic just assumed I had autism. I got my diagnosis 3 days ago ❤️

[@elizabethgrey6040]

Congrats! :)

[@merihirvonen527]

happy for you! 💛

[@lornatw]

Same thing happened to me but turns out its ADHD and Dyspraxic traits. So it's also important to be well educated so you can make clear distinguishes between your experiences and take that to a doctor. I think I it should be a shared relationship between professional and patient rather than solely yourself or solely a doctor especially if you do have a disorder or are really really struggling.

[@lizjenkin7170]

Congratulations! I had a similar thing happen. One of my autistic students asked me: "When did you know you were autistic?" "I- I'm autistic? You think so?" "Well duh. It's obvious - you're just like me. I thought you knew!"

[@rulerzreachf4n200]

I got that a lot too! I got diagnosed yesterday. I’d have people ask me if I am autistic after talking to me, I seem to make friends better with autistic people who also thought I was autistic before I had said I wasn’t diagnosed. I mean I am now, and I’m happy about it. I hope I will be able to get the support I need and people won’t treat me any differently.

[@Skymenta215]

i’m 19! and my best friend, who is clinically diagnosed with autism, basically told me she’s pretty positive i’m autistic. and i was like “i think you’re right” after she started telling me why. turns out, my doctor agrees and recommended i get tested. now just have to inform my mom who used to call me “autistic” as an insult. 😭

[@MoonMoon-zz3lq]

Feels bad man... I hope the situation goes well for you! Even if your mom isn’t supportive at least you can know that there’s a community of people who are here for you even then. Good luck!

[@diiandraa_]

May I know why?

[@CocoaBe3tle]

my mom used to call me autistic as an insult.......I’m now in the process of getting a diagnosis

[@Skymenta215]

@@diiandraa_ wdym?

[@diiandraa_]

@@Skymenta215 what “signs” or “symptoms” did you have that made you guys think it was autism? I’m just curious. (is “symptom” or “sign” even the right word? i’m not sure) i’m just trying to learn a little about this!

[@essysworld398]

As a self diagnosed person who is certain of my autism and tried to get a diagnosis, only to go mute in front of the psychiatrist, thank you

[@anascarlet]

D'awww but going mute in front of your psychiatrist is an autistic thing to do... that should go towards your diagnosis? Also, did they offer you the option to write??

[@essysworld398]

Ana Scarlet I don’t think he noticed. I talked in the beginning and went mute after my dad took over the conversation. In hindsight, I definitely should’ve written everything down beforehand.

[@senna8653]

if you ever want to try again, id advise writing all of it down in detail beforehand, kind of like a script to read from. doing this has helped me a LOT in my meetings with professionals. and if you dont think the script will work, you can try emailing the psychiatrist beforehand or writing a note just saying that you go nonverbal sometimes and may not be able to verbally communicate, and if the psychiatrist is good then they'll work with you to figure out how to navigate the situation. you're so so strong for even trying to get a diagnosis. i know firsthand how hard and nerve-wracking that is, and i just want to say that im so so proud of you

[@unapatton1978]

@@needtoknow1989 Oh, I hadn't realized, it's something others do. Thank you for mentioning that " talking in your head"

[@judetheobscure4983]

I literally had the exact same thing happen to me! It was so upsetting

[@playdoh658]

Also not everyone has supportive parents, so that’s another reason why it’s hard to get diagnosed

[@ynntari2775]

Everytime I have a breakdown because I can't physically stand excessive noises anymore, my parents keep saying stuff like "nobody throws this tentrum because of this, so why can't you just not?", "there's no justification for you to do this", "it's my way, I like to make noises, I'll continue making them, you're egoistic for telling me to stop", "let them make it, people can make whatever they want, you can't ask them to stop", "people don't normally get all this sensitive because of this small little things", "you're too sensitive". This one "you're too sensitive" is like, "ok, mom, what do I do about it?". Then she's like "just stop being". ⠀ School staff did the exact very thing, and they'd punish me everytime by having a breakdown when the other students triggered me on purpose without being even told to do it less. ⠀ They say they didn't have or didn't raise have a crazy child, that this won't happen in their family. ⠀ Sorry if it looks like a rent, I think it's relevant so I'm leaving it.

[@loren2856]

Yeah, when bringing the possibility of having ASD to my mother she said "oh well, you'd be high functioning so you're fine" same thing she said when I was depressed and wanted to unalive myself

[@wispofthevalley]

When I told them how I felt they dismissed my symptoms by saying everyone feels like that. I am going to present a clear document with evidence and maybe only then, then, they will take me to the doctor.

[@icravedeath.1200]

My dad was initially hesitant.

[@autism_adhd_andme9421]

My mother was not supportive. I told her I am Autistic and she did not believe me. She needed a doctor note to prove it. Now I am angry because I'm not able to tell her and to do my "I told you so" dance because she passed away December 2nd from stage 4 lung cancer in 2020

[@Clau.L.Craciun]

In 2016, I realized that I might be autistic and I told some people what I think. They made fun of me and didn't believe me. In 2020 I got my diagnosis at 37 and told the same people about it. They still don't believe I'm autistic. Some people are just ignorant.

[@dominic.h.3363]

I've read so many people say this and I'm also 37 looking for a diagnosis. My mom is my favorite, her mantra is "You know you won't be able to fool doctors, right?", like I'm pretending. I wonder what the new catchphrase will be IF I get the diagnosis.

[@imagismus]

she said it. period. it's super expensive to get a diagnosis where i live and - after infodumping about over 40 minutes about months of research and self-analysis, i'm more than happy to have heard my psychiatrist saying even though he can't technically run assessments for autism, that he will have to reconsider the diagnosis he had previously given me (which was bpd! and i started to think it was wrong)! shoutout to all the autistic girlies out there who are still discovering themselves 🧚🏼‍♀my closest friend is autistic and as soon as i started sharing certain experiences with her it led me to conclusions and MANY "aha!" moments

[@unseeliesidhegoddess]

I was misdiagnosed BPD as well. It's really common, especially in folks who are AFAB and who are considered highly intelligent, because of all our masking.

[@notjoeschmoe]

Oh my godddddd I’ve had a bpd/cptsd diagnosis forever now and the more I read about autism, the more I’m like…… hmmm…… but I don’t have 4 grand to get assessed. It’s tough shit!!

[@ЛукВарёный]

Same! I self diagnosed as autistic and asked my psychiatrist about it and she said that I might be autistic. It’s a shame that she can’t diagnose anyone with autism, because if she could, I would already have an answer to “am I autistic?”

[@KK-qq3sz]

Gosh i told myself i wasn't going to cry. I'm 17 and I've known i was different my whole life, I've been trying to get a diagnosis but it's hard because i don't want to tell anyone cause i'm afraid they wouldn't understand. This helped me a lot Paige so thank you

[@avettcore]

@K K I have a similar situation rn, hope trying to get a diagnosis goes well!

[@kat3217]

Self diagnosing isn’t real

[@code-grammardude5974]

just turned 18, same situation, it's tuff

[@wuraola9396]

Hi, I'm also 17 and I just recently began suspecting I'm autistic. Unfortunately, I live in a developing country with next to no resources for neurodivergence. So self diagnosis is the best I can do.

[@Coco-bl8zg]

Everyone's feeling matter whether you are diagnosed or not. Everyone who struggles with something deserves to have accommodations to make life easier. Just because you were not clinically diagnosed it doesn't mean you are wrong or "faking it". I am going to get tested for autism in a few days but for years I just felt as if I needed to get a diagnosis in order for anything to get easier. Unfortunately, Some people do think that if you are not diagnosed, you can't have accommodations. I struggle so much with life and because I was not diagnosed at a young age I had to live my childhood trying to deal with being treated exactly like a "normal" person. I feel traumatized because of that because it is so hard to be "normal" when you know you just aren't. This is why it is important to listen to people who self-diagnose and let them have resources to make life easier for them.

[@sirwatzhizface]

This video makes me glad because recently I've been seeing a lot more autistic people online and it made me wonder about myself because I relate to a lot of what they say, especially a lot of what I've heard you say on tik tok. I asked my psychiatrist about it and he says that's what he's been thinking that I might have autism, but since then I'm too afraid to get on his ass about it, but I'm fairly confident I'm autistic and he seems to think so too so he might be working on it idk

[@mirandaferran9401]

Brave of you to share that!! your story matters and i hope you get it figured out

[@meganmccook5519]

Hi I’m recently diagnosed autistic, it was my psychiatrist that picked up on it and pointed it out. But because I am already “in the system” of therapists and psychiatrists etc it was alott easier and quicker process for me to get a diagnosed, like within a few months in comparison to years for someone going through their gp for the first time. i just wanted to say if you felt comfortable enough to bring it up again to your therapists it might be helpful because you may be able to get an accurate diagnosis and go through the process alot quicker because you went through your therapist. Idk if that makes any sense but yhh. I hope things work out for you whether you seek a diagnosis or not. ☺️

[@TheCimbrianBull]

I urge you to push forward with getting an evaluation and possible diagnosis. That way you can get on with your life.

[@piperellyn]

for anyone from the UK: the NHS prioritises diagnoses to 1. children and 2. males, so if you are an adult female wanting to be diagnosed the waitlists can take years! there’s also very limited ways to get an autism diagnosis as an adult through the NHS and you will more likely have to get tested privately unless you are a child.

[@leikfroakies]

It get worse. Waiting lists are local so if you move you get taken off and have to start all over again. I wont be living in one place for at least 3 years so I can't even get on a waiting list long enough to be seen to

[@leiacottrell3205]

I was just diagnosed on March 2nd and will be 21 later this year. In a way, if you don't self-diagnose in the constructive way that you described, then you can't advocate for yourself. I know this experience especially affects women and girls with autism, as we are forced to have to mask so well that if you don't advocate for yourself because no one can see how you truly feel behind closed doors, you may not ever get that help. Speak up for yourself. It could literally save and change your life :) also halfway through the video I noticed your Cricut and now I need to see what you make!!!!

[@kittyvalbuena182]

Thank you for bringing up how Autism is gendered. That’s really important

[@katespaulding4563]

sooo true that if you don't self-diagnose you can't advocate for yourself as well! wow!

[@annabellewilson0101]

How did you go about getting your diagnosis?

[@kickme5592]

Exactly!

[@andrewbaerwalde3706]

I’m literally in your same shoes and I’ll be 21 in October

[@acetraineraster5171]

Thank you so much for this. I'm self-diagnosed. I really appreciate when people say that rejecting self-diagnosis is classist, because that's the huge thing that many people don't understand. Like you said. If someone is financially unable to get a diagnosis, they still deserve accommodations and a supportive community to lean on!! Diagnoses are *so ungodly expensive* when they really shouldn't be!!

[@unseeliesidhegoddess]

Yep, or in my case, my insurance covered 1 assessment with a very limited list of professionals, none of whom were experienced in diagnosing adult autistic gifted females. So the guy I met with virtually twice who gave me the exact assessment he gives little boys decided I am not autistic. And I will not be able to get an official second opinion. So I am self-diagnosed.

[@mikelmontoya2965]

I went for about three years knowing I was autistic before I was clinically diagnosed at 19, and I really don't know if I would have made it without that knowledge, I can't put into words how liberated I became from shame and the feeling that I was malfunctioning once I knew. I think people deserve that relief regardless of whether the medical institutions keep ignoring them or not.

[@azaaellise]

I am so happy for you have a wonderful day 💜💜

[@alexabell5004]

I’m glad you got that diagnosis.

[@Kpop0223]

I recently got diagnosed with ADHD and so many strategies for teaching ADHD kids will help the general population, struggling readers, ESOL students, etc. I'm a student teacher and I'm realizing accommodating some students helps all.

[@MargauxNeedler]

That's what I was thinking!

[@J_C_90s]

I am an ESOL teacher by trade, currently taking a break to raise my kiddo. I have also discovered, since having her, that I am definitely neurodivergent. Most of my symptoms align with ADD and I am so glad I had that educational background to help recognize my own struggles. Congrats on being a student teacher and I wish you the best! It takes all kinds of brains to teach students!

[@emmamurphy738]

I haven’t been to a doctor in a really long time, and have never been diagnosed with anything. I’ve always wondered why “self-diagnosing” was seen as bad. Are you just supposed to ignore symptoms until you run into a doctor on the street and get an actual diagnosis. I think it’s okay, as someone not diagnosed with anything, I think the problem I’ve had with “self-diagnosing” is when people use it for sympathy and don’t have any intent of trying to help yourself. I haven’t finished the video yet but that’s my two sense. So far I’m agreeing. I really like that you’re bringing this topic up because I think saying that self diagnosing is problematic does more harm than good. It invalidates people who are genuinely struggling and want help.

[@ohhmangos]

i think self diagnosing is ok when the people who self diagnose have read DSM requirements, symptoms, and have seen what other people go through in a majority thing. If you have researched from credible sites you can self diagnose. But of course if your self diagnosed you should say self diagnosed.

[@sapphirek5244]

I’m stuck in diagnosis “purgatory.” I have a degree in psychology and human services so I am educated and take the ethics of diagnosis soooo seriously. So I saw you and several other autistic creators and felt like it was very specific to my experiences. So then I went to the DSM5 and I hit the criteria, I looked the ASAN and other resources and those resources also say I’m most likely autistic. But I am *terrified* of getting a diagnosis because I have an extensive history of doctors dismissing me beyond what even seems reasonable to dismiss and I cannot afford to see multiple doctors in hopes one of them will listen to me. Not to mention the horror stories from other adult women having bias against getting diagnosed. But I’m so tired of feeling like I have to explain myself and not being able to because I don’t have the piece of paper.

[@swissarmyknight4306]

I understand this feeling so well.

[@ha.6215]

That sweater is either itchy or silky and the fact that I cannot tell is killing me because I'm feeling both sensations at once trying to imagine the texture.

[@RavenM-vt4yc]

I was thinking the exact same thing, haha!

[@kit10]

I would guess not itchy since sensory issues tend to be big with autistic people.

[@CyraEm]

@@kit10 True, but sensory issues are different for every individual with them. Some people are bothered by silky textures and stick to rough textures instead, others are sensory seeking and would choose itchy clothing on purpose for the stimulation.

[@proserpine3332]

I just looked at and I hate fabric like that now my teeth hurt lol

[@Catlily5]

@@CyraEm I hate silk because it feels like it's clinging to me. But I hate itchy sweaters too.

[@vaneu780]

My parents immigrated to America from Mexico. Their knowledge of autism or any learning disabilities was zero. I was just diagnosed last year at 28 years old. Only after my own son was diagnosed did I realize. In Hispanic culture there is absolutely no knowledge about neurodiversity. I do my best to spread awareness to my community because I know there has to be an incredible amount of undiagnosed Hispanics. Just struggling through life. So I agree with you and will ALWAYS accept self diagnosis.

[@thatoneradicalizedprussian225]

Same here. My parents are gone now, but I have an uncle I trust who's really helped me a lot. I've been doing research for more than a year now, and I'm sure I'm on the spectrum but don't want to self diagnose. Being 19, life is getting more complicated and I find myself having to explain my behaviors often. I want to tell them but I'm afraid they won't understand.

[@riannamajzoub5241]

My father is from Beiruit, Lebanon(immigrated to US in 1975) and had absoulutely no knowledge of neurodiversity or anything at all about autism while I was growning up. My american born irish/french mom had a master's in education and thankfully was my only advocate and still is. I was diagnosed at seven years old and my father was in denial for years. Similar trend in Arab culture as well. I am still recieving medical care for my trauma and mental health issues as a result of my rough upbringing.

[@yamitherabbit8239]

I'm from Argentina and I can confirm that there's almost no knowledge about neurodiversity and that's making my diagnosis process extremely difficult, no one takes me seriously either because I'm a girl and 'i don't look autistic'. It also seems that here Autism and Asperger are still diagnosed as separate things so I don't really trust the centers- and the test is extremely expensive

[@kat3217]

Imagine thinking self dx is valid- I cannot wrap my head around that. The term itself “self diagnosed” is a hyperbole

[@cupio-stardust]

As much as I get that they don’t know about it since they didn’t grow up rich in Mexico, it infuriates me when they say that I can’t have autism because I can speak and that autistic people can’t speak or move at all. 🤦

[@rockinstrawberries]

I'm scared to seek a diagnosis BC what if I just get told my struggles are everyday struggles and I'm just weak and can't handle?

[@katlynroberts8635]

I’ve been feeling the same.

[@ohhmangos]

no no no ok lemme tell you something. This world says your weak and can't handle WHEN your struggles are real and abnormal. "abnormal." It is always worth to seek a diagnosis.

[@NatAndKaii]

My thought literally all my life

[@Audrey-on7si]

I think that there are doctors who would think that way. However, there still are doctors who would think that you should get a diagnosis and it might just take changing to another doctor that understands you better. Also, if you never bring it up to them then they would never think that you would need a diagnosis. I never mentioned I had trouble with concentrating, but when I did, my doctor told me that it might be worth checking for ADHD. Also, make sure to tell them why you think you need a diagnosis because the doctor doesn’t know your history.

[@ynntari2775]

No doctor was supposed to say that not handling everyday struggles is weak. "everyday struggles" can be extremely demanding and sickening. If a specific mental disorder diagnosis is rulled out, your struggles are still big and relevant. If they cause you distress and impede your well-being and life-quality, it doesn't matter what the causes are, you're not "weak" for struggling with them. Identifying the cause matters to adress the problems, not to tell if they deserve attention or not.

[@2nouli]

Another reason for not getting an actual diagnosis: Ableist parents somethimes your parents refuse to accept that their kid has something going on, so they refuse to listem and to take you to a doctor, and you will only be able to get the diagnosis when you're older

[@sneakerq]

I'm 17F and self diagnosed. You've made me realize I am and it makes everything make so much more sense in my life. I thought I just had social anxiety, but I'm learning that I probably got it from being autistic and seeing how I didn't fit in. I was very isolated at school by most of the kids, and I never knew why. I've always dealt with this extreme loneliness because I didn't have close friends or anything, and I always thought there was something wrong with me. I'm just different than most people and that's okay.

[@MargauxNeedler]

I wonder what stands out the most about me to other people. I'm just curious. I have no diagnosis, either, and struggle with social anxiety that I believe likely stems from other undiagnosed mental differences. I relate so much with some autistic people that I feel like we could be friends or already are friends energetically at heart.

[@alice-yw8ji]

i also have social anxiety and i think it’s because communicating with others wasn’t never easy to me... i don’t know what to say in social situations and i always need to have a scenario in my head or an example to know what to say and what to do... that made me really anxious and that’s why i think i developed social anxiety

[@WillyMan6938]

DONT FUCKING SELF DIAGNOSE. YOU DONT KNOW WHATS GOING ON WITH YOU UNTIL YOU GET IT CHECKED OUT WITH A DOCTOR

[@sneakerq]

@@WillyMan6938 I hope you realize doctors aren't always right either.

[@WillyMan6938]

@@sneakerq well you still shouldn’t fucking diagnose

[@tinywhineygrimeylad4445]

I basically have to self diagnose, and it feels bad but no one else knows as much about me as I do. I'm masking hardcore, and I have been for 10 years (i Am 15). Recently I'm trying to open up more, but I feel very strange about it. It feels like I have to mask by now, I don't know why. I can't tell anyone about these aspects of myself. So it's nice when people say it's ok to self diagnose, because I feel like I have to. I want to understand myself. It will be like this until I can get clinically diagnosed.

[@stellarivers92]

I finally got diagnosed a week ago and I’m finally understanding myself. That being said, my family is less supportive and outright deny it, but I still feel that I would’ve done better if I was diagnosed as a child. I’m happy to watch your vids cuz it was a step to really think of myself and go to get my diagnosis.

[@marisa4112]

i recently deleted tiktok because it was having a negative impact on my mental health, but you were one of the creators i really loved on there so i get super excited when you post on youtube!! :)

[@lagemgem2001]

I’m 35 (36 next month) & was diagnosed 3 weeks ago. I wish I had been diagnosed as a child. Life has been an uphill battle and instead of getting to the top, the hill just gets steeper. It was because of another KZbinr that I even went about getting a diagnosis. Thankful for videos like yours!

[@unseeliesidhegoddess]

Yes! As an undiagnosed autistic adult, you start to wonder why everyone else has their sh!t together with their houses and their 401k and their cardigan sweaters, and you're still wearing funny t-shirts (with the tags cut out) and collecting stuffies and working low-wage service jobs. At least that was one of my first clues that something didn't add up.

[@jeanettemcharness2841]

I'm 67 years old. The entire landscape of my life has been shredded with the revelation (self discovered) that I have been masking autism my whole life! I can't even begin to imagine having a dialogue with my family about it! My thinking says ....."Just glean all the information I can, fix myself, and I won't upset anyone else." I'm at the front end of this journey, excuse me but I'm quite fucking crazy! I appreciate your openness ....you are helping me! It has been a lifetime ( my lifetime) of masking....I'm so very tired. But.....there is a crack in "the wall" and a tiny beam of light coming through. I will continue to explore.... Watch your videos....and work towards self love and grace. Thank you!

[@quenchycactusjuice1921]

Welcome to another episode of: *am I actually a neurodivergent or is it just for attention* ?😃

[@rulerzreachf4n200]

Same and I got diagnosed yesterday and I STILL WORRY ABOUT THIS =‘)

[@renemccracken6319]

I can’t tell if it’s a coping mechanism or a *coping* mechanism

[@MrLoudthought]

😂🤣😂🤣

[@quenchycactusjuice1921]

@@renemccracken6319 pls💀🤚

[@SimfreakOlena]

I am unsure if my shitty executive functioning has roots in neurodivergency or in "bad" parenting and lack of motivation But thank god, I am diagnosed with autism, else it would be hard to figure that out as well

[@ArtsyMegz_On_Etsy]

I have the majority of the symptoms of Aspergers, but am having a hard time getting a doctor to give me a referral to a psychiatrist for a diagnosis. And then I ask myself, "Well, do I really NEED a diagnosis? Would my life change at all?" The only thing that more people might believe me. But Aspergers makes a lot of sense for me throughout my childhood and as an adult. I have always had sensory issues to sound and touch (which was sad, because my mother couldn't give me a hug, but I was too little to explain why); I very rarely fit in to a group (but click with other people who are on the spectrum); I have always found something to be obsessed with (I haven't met anyone who was as obsessed about music as I am; I would listen to it for hours, make music on toy instruments, sang for a minimum of 2 hours a day, and COULD NOT WAIT to buy a new music album). Life gets a little bit boring if I don't find something to be obsessed with. I have social phobia, often get labelled as weird or different, repeat certain words (for comfort, especially if I don't know what else to say), take things quite literally (which causes me confusion at work), prefer to do things alone, feel more comfortable around animals, and always find something to research and learn about. There were even times when common sense didn't register and I would have no idea why everybody else suddenly started doing the same thing in a situation, and I felt like I was the only one who didn't get the memo. But I love my mind and love who I am. I have accepted myself, and that's what matters. 💗

[@ascendednightingale2456]

They don’t call it Asperger’s anymore. It’s now just called autism spectrum disorder, and they classify you from support level 1 to 3, with 3 meaning you need the most support.

[@andreal3239]

I love this, accommodations don’t take from academic integrity but everyone thinks the world will fall apart if you don’t penalize people for handing in assignments late or for expressing knowledge in a bit of a different way, the only thing I have to say is like it bugs me when people joke about the diagnosis like “I’m so ptsd I’m so triggered I got ptsd from losing my keys” or something like that, people think it’s fine but then like I’m sitting around my friends who know I have ptsd and I’m put in the position of being a “party-pooper” or something if I am like yo those jokes don’t sit well with me because it misrepresents one of the most horrible experiences of my life not to make this dark or anything, and It’s not just rude people that do it almost everyone does it, and I know if I really showed my friends like yo this isn’t ok they would respect it but I would feel so guilty making them feel bad about something literally everyone does, I don’t want to somehow burden them with my trauma, it’s just awkward and sucks and idk, not a fan of joking about diagnosis, at least not trauma based diagnosis

[@meganmullis5386]

I know, I hate how common mental illness jokes are from people who aren't affected by them. Like, it's one thing if you have depression and joke about it, it's another thing entirely if you don't have depression and joke about it. I remember the other day I had a friend who made a self harm joke to me and he doesn't know that I used to be a self-harmer, but I was still so put off by it but just kind of went along like it didn't matter because I didn't want anyone to look at me weird for pointing out how problematic things like that are. I don't know, it just annoys me when people make light of things they don't understand.

[@andreal3239]

@@fatnorth723 well, I mean think about that for a minute, it’s awesome that you worked hard to get it done on time, but is someone else taking more time truly unfair to you? I feel like we should all be allowed to learn at our own pace in our own ways, and if that kid truly just didn’t want to do it earlier like why? Maybe they have different goals or other needs that are more important to them idk, but like, penalizing for lateness doesn’t really help anyone, because if we have to penalize kids for doing things late they often don’t learn the value of handing things on time, so even then idk that it helps time management, but really though in a class how does someone else handing in late directly negatively affect you, I just feel like everyone’s grades should be based on demonstration of knowledge, especially cause there’s a ton of undiagnosed kids that might not be able to access accommodations, I don’t think you or anyone should be penalized for handing in late, and I don’t think that not penalizing others devalues the accomplishment of you handing it in on time despite it being more work, rather I feel like your immense hard work should be celebrated when handing things on time because that’s an impressive demonstration of your determination and time management skills and coping skills, it shows you’re willing to work really hard and that’s awesome, and also even when it’s provided as an accommodation like I always feel like I’m the messed up one I’m the problem because my learning needs mean I need to learn slower, and I never get praised for how much better I understand the concept compared to others once I do learn it, to me it feels restrictive because it doesn’t let me explore learning styles and make mistakes but rather always makes me feel less than any time I need an extension, even though I have a lot of disabilities, and if I need say a 2 weeks extension that horrifies most people and professors and yet it is what I need, there are rigid ideals of when things should be handed in and they just aren’t always helpful, I would love the freedom to learn at my own pace and explore all my learning styles, of course it’s not always practical and there are types of classes where deadlines are penalized like, if you don’t have it done you won’t know how to do the in class activity when it’s time, but I think everyone can appreciate those consequences without mark deductions, idk, it just seems unnecessary to me, like if I don’t get the course done in the allotted months then I get to retry next semester, to be able to do that for most courses for 1-2 years would be invaluable to me, but most of society is so rigid about the importance of deadlines I’ll never get that chance, who knows maybe it would be a terrible mistake, but I would still learn a lot because mistakes are the best teachers, I often daydream about it, one teacher I had in highschool gave us this opportunity and it wasn’t long enough but it was an amazing experience, and I feel like I was finally able to have the chance to work for my own reasons and motivations rather than for a dreadful deadline, I did hand in less stuff, but by the end of the semester I was finally starting to learn some real time management skills

[@kaiya33123]

@@andreal3239 WOW! THANKYOU so much for your post! I completely agree with you! I am a really hard working student, but have always felt less than because it would take me hours more, even days, to complete an assignment versus my friends or other peers. I knew that if i had a paper due in two weeks, i would have to start researching and gathering my information the day I got it, but then I fall back in other classes if I focus too much on one subject... and in the end I just feel the sense of "less than" like you discuss. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I appreciate the time you took to explain your thought process as it helped me gain more knowledge about myself as well😊 Take care and stay safe💟

[@andreal3239]

@@fatnorth723 as I said in my further comment I don’t believe penalizing kids teaches them time management because then they never learn the value of handing anything in in time, and they’re always relying on the pressure of a deadline instead of real time management skills, and if a kid doesn’t want to hand something in what does that teach them? That they’ll get a lower grade on the schoolwork they already don’t care about? I feel like there are just other ways, deadlines have their own reasons for being helpful without the threat of lost marks, they give you guidelines to manage your time, a goal to work towards, etc, so idk why we don’t focus on that when we are teaching kids time management, we all grow up just threatened with lower grades as if it teaches time management, if a kid is truly not trying at all their grades will reflect that regardless of penalization, the system should in my opinion be one that involves feedback that is useful and non threatening, and if a kid isn’t handing anything in at all, someone can then explain why it’s important to them, some kids aren’t doing it at all cause they’re literally just really smart and know it already and don’t wanna do the work that they already know how to do, should that kid get a 50% or more challenging work? for the kid who truly doesn’t care, at some point will find that he/she doesn’t like knowing way less than any other student and doesn’t like being extremely behind in the work compared to others, it’s not about letting kids fall through the cracks it’s about letting kids find their reasons and motivations to do the work, and when we don’t allow them second chances to do the work we are denying them the opportunity to learn, even if they’re the kid that just doesn’t care at all, and when we penalize kids like this we often teach them to not try again when they fail, or that if they learn later than their peers their learning is worthless, and even though extensions are given to kids with accommodations that shame is often carried anyway, the truth is everyone needs to learn at their pace to best learn how to learn, but when kids with disabilities are singled out for getting extensions idk about you but to me it feels rough and is the main reason I refused accommodations that I needed for 8 years because I didn’t want to carry that shame, instead I hid my poor marks and never learned how to solve these issues because I never had the space to, and then in university my marks matter a ton and no way in heck will I be given the space to learn that stuff now, and here even students with disabilities get treated badly when asking for extensions, I’ve frequently had to violate my own privacy to get professors to understand why I need them, and I’ve been screamed at a couple times, once for needing an extension, the other simply for handing in my accommodation letter because “I better just learn to be responsible” and the disabilities office can only put 2-5 day extension on my letter because that’s “academic integrity” when sometimes my illness causes me to be out for 2 weeks, and then to everyone, because I’m sick, I’m the girl that needs way more help than she “should” need because it would breech academic integrity to put my real needs on an accommodations letter because it horrifies everyone to think anyone could deserve a 2 week extension because deadlines are more important than learning as it has been expressed to me many many many times, so I love this idea of “if the kid is trying they deserve the extension regardless of disability” but it’s just not how it happens

[@andreal3239]

@@kaiya33123 thank you for your kind message :) I’m glad I helped, honestly i had “feels inferior to all of her classmates” in my school records (I was getting assessed around the time) since grade 3 even though I’m highly intelligent (according to IQ test anyway) because it was so shameful to learn at the pace I actually needed, plus I didn’t get the right support, I thought I was so dumb for so long and now I look back and realize that my favourite book in gr 4 was a book I got from my mom that was assigned to her in first year university while at the same time I wasn’t allowed to read books with more than 200 pages in school, I just wasn’t allowed to learn the way I needed to do I kinda gave up on it, it’s not my process, I can’t do it at the same speed, for a while in university actually I would be studying a textbook and working through it at my speed which wasn’t “fast enough” and then my roommate who was in some of the same classes would be confused and I would in 2 seconds make everything make sense to her, and this was common, the parts I understood I understood them exceptionally well, but I’d get terrible marks cause I never had the time to work through the whole chapter, now I do a reduced course load but I’m still screwed over my my other illnesses and disabilities and honestly what really messed me up was all the penalization for not learning at the same speed, I wasted years trying to do it faster for others which never worked for me, at best I would get an 80, with a ton of stress, forget it immediately after, and begin to hate and resent school, at worst I couldn’t put it together and failed miserably and ended up intensely hating the schoolwork, now I’m just trying to accept the school system can screw me over, I will have to violate my privacy regularly while being super polite in order to get extensions I need, and when all else fails I’ll retake a course because thank god I have the financial privelege because even if the school doesn’t get it, knowledge is more important to me than missed deadlines so failed grades and for me this is the only way to truly learn and once I’m done I’ll have learned deeper than practically anyone

[@julsdemers4740]

id like to mention that sometimes some people get medically diagnosed with things they don't have, by mistake or by doctors wanting to just get things done, a thing that happened to me, where i've gotten more help by self diagnosing (with massive amounts of research first of course) then suggesting it to a professional. otherwise everyone i went to clinged to a wrong diagnosis from my childhood and nothing progressed...

[@walterkuzak2008]

It's fine to do research to figure out if you may have a disorder, but you can't be sure you have it until you go to a psychiatrist. I thought I had munchausen's syndrome for many years but it turns out I actually have ocd. It's set my progress back because I'm only now getting proper treatment. So it can be harmful to make assumptions

[@julsdemers4740]

@@walterkuzak2008 indeed, hence why i mentionned to suggest the possibility to a professional, so that they can test if its correct or not, as they know better, since they studied it. but it can definitely help to atleast point out "hey, i think i might have this, because so and so" and have a conversation about it with said professional.

[@walterkuzak2008]

@@julsdemers4740 I wasn't disagreeing with you, just adding my experience

[@julsdemers4740]

@@walterkuzak2008 i wasnt disagreeing either, i just taught i'd add onto it since you pointed it out :) yknow, to make my thoughts clearer since i feel i didnt write them out clear enough the first time ^^

[@walterkuzak2008]

@@julsdemers4740 for sure

[@Lillyluvsanime]

I've read the diagnostic criteria and, from what I know of myself I fit. I've also done AQ tests from Autistic-run sites, not Buzzfeed. I always score in the, "likely/very likely range." I'm taking steps to pursue diagnosis and get support for coping/adulting.

[@christopherhansen9026]

When you talked about how people deserve accommodations for their needs, regardless og whether their needs are described by a clinical diagnosis, it reminded me of this video I watched about mutual aid. They used a phrase, short and sweet, that stuck with me. They said "everyone deserves everything they need." It's a very sympathetic and understanding view to hold, and I appreciate it. Great video! 🙏

[@gwendolynsnyder463]

I am clinically diagnosed with being autistic. My mom diagnosed herself with Autism, based on what psychiatrists told her about me. When my mom was listening to the psychiatrists laying out all the reasons I'm autistic, my mom is like "holy shit! That's literally me!" In her head. She just doesn't get an official diagnosis because she already learnt how to navigate this neurotypical world. She wouldn't profit from a diagnosis anymore.

[@187942]

I cried just about the entire video. I can’t thank you enough for being you and validating my feelings

[@sherrisour360]

I was diagnosed at 18, but I knew for a long time. Self diagnoses is important to getting a real one, especially for those afab. Our experiences are often over looked.

[@rulerzreachf4n200]

Thank you for saying AFAB instead of female. I’m a trans guy and it was still hard for me to get a diagnosis as I was born female and people view me as that even though I have said I identify as male to some people. It feels like people don’t take it seriously.

[@Anonymous-df8it]

just say female lmao

[@sherrisour360]

@@Anonymous-df8it There are many autistic people who do not identify with their assigned birth gender, so I say Afab. I am one of those people and will continue to say afab.

[@Anonymous-df8it]

@@sherrisour360 You can tell which definition of 'female' they're using from context.

[@cdawg9218]

I think most people who self diagnose are like me and just trying to make sense of why they're like this. Self diagnosis has helped me be kind to myself and has at least changed my self talk so I can at least not feel like an awful person while I find things hard. No resources needed, just a bit of understanding yourself better and a bit extra self esteem.

[@emosterjpeg5000]

I really like this video, I don't have a diagnosis but when I treat myself like I have autism, and create routines for each and every day, when I let myself stim, when I let myself move and rock like I did when I was a little kid! I see so much improvement in myself and being able to keep up with things.

[@Chr0meHeart]

I truly believe I have autism. I've been binging your videos along with other related content. It's just not financially possible for me to get a diagnosis and tbh idk if it ever will be. I'm 28 now and I'm realizing how different i am to most people these days. One of my close online friends is diagnosed autistic and we both relate so much to each other its wild. Not only that, but multiple direct relatives of mine have a lot of autistic traits but have gone on undiagnosed as well. I wanna say that I am, but without that diagnosis it means nothing to other people. it sucks. but ive been finding healthier ways to cope with it as i get older and maybe one day ill be comfortable enough financially to go through with a diagnosis.

[@ellisquinne9777]

I nearly fucking cried at this. I have autistic family members and friends so I have always be pretty educated on the topic. I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age but never medicated. Now that I am an adult and in college I am going to therapy and looking to be medicated. Recently I've been thinking about all my ticks and habits that I have some I chocked up to my ADHD some I just thought were weird quirks. I started wondering if I could potentially be on the spectrum. So I voiced this to a few friends and told them I will be talking to my therapist about it. They got really weird and said that I was self diagnosing and I was being unhealthy saying "webmd isn't a reputable source" I tried to explain that I have multiple autistic people in my life that I've talked to about it and have been watching autistic youtubers because I understand the importance of hearing it from the person who is actually experiencing it. I also explained that I am going to let my therapist do the actual diagnosing but they still were mad and haven't talked to me since. So this was extremely validating thank you.

[@kpaxian6044]

Wow. They stopped talking to you for that? If you had every symptom of migraine headaches and asked them..."I have visual auras, head pain on one side, often severe light sensitivity and nausea...I think I want to see about getting a diagnosis for migraines..." I wonder if they would have stopped talking to you, too. Not every therapist is emotionally or mentally healthy. Some do really odd things, apparently, like ghost their patients who merely ask a question after realizing that they have checked off a bunch of checklists and realize that the majority of the symptoms apply to you. I am sorry for your experience. I think it would be poetic justice if you got your diagnosis and then emailed them saying..."Well, I just got my results back and since learning that many on the spectrum are not the best with reading social cues...I was wondering if you could give me insight into why you stopped talking to me when I brought this up, since I am now confirmed as being autistic, because I found your behaviour confusing and irrational." Sorry. Your therapist sounds rather awful.

[@neurodivergentdawn]

I was diagnosed last month at the age of 22. If i hadn't mentioned possible ASD to my psychiatrist i strongly don't think I would have been diagnosed. Self diagnosis is valid, and an important step into receiving an official diagnosis as an adult in my opinion.

[@ericafox5098]

4:42 Paige starts singing out of nowhere and oh my God I was not expecting that voice! You have a beautiful singing voice!

[@maryseflore7028]

I'm a 51 year old woman from Quebec and tried to get an official diagnosis a few years ago - instead, I was told I had a personality disorder, and that I cannot be autistic because I like hugs... Now, I agree with the personality disorder part - but that has nothing to do with being or not being autistic; I already am neurodivergent (OCD and Tourette). After some research, I found that in my province, the whole procedure to diagnose an adult can take up to THREE years. It's ridiculous. So, I'm self-diagnosed. A lot of people ask me if I'm autistic because of some obvious behaviors I have, and I always say yes. My son is probably autistic as well, but he fell through the cracks and never got a proper diagnosis. It's very frustrating.

[@lignjahal]

I had to utilize self-diagnosis at 16 to advocate for me being diagnosed at 17. It's a helpful tool is getting you versed enough in the language to be the best advocate or yourself.

[@ynntari2775]

I love how kindhearted the KZbin communities are. And they agree with me, it's awesome.

[@Ikine557]

My one problem with self diagnosis is the potential for misdiagnosis. There are things that present similarly to other things, and particularly for physical conditions, this can get dangerous if you're not careful.

[@superzooperhaze6597]

but it's not like with self diagnosing with, say, a dissociative disorder, where neurological issues like a brain tumor could be the underlying cause. it's just a way to find community and possibly make accommodations in your own home to make life easier.

[@amaiyagrace]

I have 2 children who have autism and ADHD. I grew up in the 1980s and 1990s when autism wasn't acknowledged in girls, just boys. Watching my 2 autistic girls shows me that I'm autistic and that it runs in families. It's called multiplex autism if there are multiple siblings with autism and one or both parents are autistic themselves. I haven't been diagnosed myself just diagnosed ADHD. Being diagnosed autistic here in North Carolina costs thousands of dollars.

[@ceilinh6004]

When I was growing up, girls didn't really get autism diagnoses. (A friend of mine recently pursued getting her diagnosis as an adult, and it was a long process.) I did pick up diagnoses for ADD & SPD along the way, so that might be enough on it's own to explain my brain, but I don't know. Mysteries of life. I go back and forth on whether or not I think I'm autistic. My son is a lot like I was as a child. His doctor has speculated that he might be on the spectrum, but we haven't talked about it since pre-covid. Once we have our vaccinations (Please, let it be soon!) I'm going to make an appointment to try and get the ball rolling on figuring things out.

[@rbedi880]

Hi! Maybe you can check out the Broad Autism Phenotype (BAP) and see if that helps you out!

[@Wolfstar26]

this was so helpful, thank you paige. i also think way more people need to hear the struggles of affording a diagnosis and getting an accurate diagnosis. i struggled all my life and i was ashamed of myself for being unable to cope with seemingly easy things in life, but i'm ready to finally see a psychiatrist and gain accommodations. thank you

[@franklinthewoman]

so happy to have your perspective and your openness talking about all these things! I live in Japan and was told by my therapist (an American) that I am probably on the spectrum but I was also told by a psychiatrist here that she couldn't do a diagnosis in English and that it would be near impossible to get it here. I don't know what to consider myself

[@midlifemulligan6505]

I'm 44 and just found out I have ADHD and may be Autistic as well. Unfortunately, it's a nightmare to try and get an assessment here in BC unless you can afford a private one. I'm just now realizing that the "mental breakdown" I suffered almost 5 years ago was most likely Autistic burnout, I haven't been able to work full-time since. I also don't qualify for any sort of financial assistance; yay "free" Canadian healthcare. After 44 years of masking, 37+ jobs, chronic fatigue/depression/anxiety, and financial devastation, I'm barely functioning as a human being. My only solace right now is I finally have an idea of why my life has been so utterly chaotic, just wish someone would have picked up on it sooner. I want a diagnosis because self-diagnosis feels like another form of masking to me. I also strongly suspect my husband is neurodivergent in some way, explains a lot of our 21 years together. Anywho, thanks for sharing your knowledge and experience, I appreciate it.

[@laurynwatts8009]

Would you be interested in making a video addressed to parents on why it’s important to let their kids know about their own diagnosis? I know a lot of people wish they knew sooner and that their parents knew but thought they’d be ‘better off’ not knowing. My sister is autistic but my mum hasn’t told her. I think she’d definitely feel better knowing and hearing an autistic person explaining it might help both of them out. Also thank you I love your content

[@luminousophie]

Hello, Paige. I took the Neuropsychological Assessment last week and I will be getting my diagnostic papers back on Monday. I have been incredibly stressed with my finals and with this purgatory of uncertainty...I have been watching you of late and I wanted to say thank you for speaking out and helping neurodivergent people. And I wanted to thank you for helping me have faith in myself- that being assessed was the right choice for me. I'm fairly certain that I am on the spectrum...It's nice to be able to say that.

[@skentel]

I work for a psychiatry clinic in Canada, just a heads up that in Canada you need a doctors referral to see a psychiatrist. You can’t call up a psychiatrist office and self refer. If your doctor is not being helpful, you can have a walk-in doctor refer you.

[@mercurialthrills9011]

Yep. This is important for people to know. I went to a psychiatrist in Canada and had to get a referral from a doctor first.

[@HolyMusicalAshleigh]

I’ve been worried about self diagnosing (with adhd specifically but I’ve also had some questions about autism lately and whether or not that is something that fits with me because I don’t fit the “norm” that media portrayed!!) and this was extremely helpful! I think you’re doing great things and putting lots of positive vibes into the internet, and I LOVE how expressive you are when you talk! Thank you for sharing your opinions with us ♡♡

[@beacarmean8335]

This makes me feel really valid because so many doctors said I was autistic and this one doctor said she wasn't sure and wanted me to have that one paper. Felt like all my struggles and all that I'd worked through was for nothing.

[@EclecticFairy]

I've suspected I was autistic for years now. I just kept bouncing back and forth about doing something about it. After covid happened and I was completely thrown out of my comfy routine, I had a complete shutdown. I couldn't even collect myself to shower. I couldn't talk. It was scary, but it also gave me the certainty that my suspicions were right. I finally brought it up with my counselor and she agreed that I'm most likely on the spectrum. She told me all my options and warned me it would be expensive. As a mom of 3 and a homeowner, I just can't justify spending that kind of money for a paper saying what I already know about myself. My counselor has since suggested that we work on my symptoms, which is what we would do anyway. Just the validation from my counselor has been a weight lifted. Thank you for this video ❤️

[@A_ree_ta]

Thank you for bringing up the Bi-Polar discourse. It is not all pretty images on tumblr. It’s angry, it’s scary, it’s depressing. And it took me a long time to be okay telling people I am Bi-Polar.

[@alexrose20]

as someone who is not officially diagnosed and can't get accomodations for AP tests, this relates to me so much

[@uglyspadez8357]

I’m AFAB and I don’t think I have autism but ADHD. I am reaching out for a diagnosis but I’m feeling very comfortable knowing that self diagnosis is ok. I’m scared because AFAB adhd is hard to diagnose that I won’t get diagnosed but I know that it’s there! I have never been so sure! So thank you for telling us and making us feel comfortable with self diagnosis

[@kaylasnyder4700]

I'm sooo glad I met you, you're literally my spirit animal, I'm almost 33, and I've always been judged on the way that IV acted, the way I am in society, I can't make friends, people judge me because I'm "weird" IV been diagnosed as ADHD, OCD, anxiety, depression but no one's ever mentioned Autism and after different research it makes sooo much sense and I can't find anyone to "diagnose" me and when I try doctors think I'm weird because I'm so "functioning" my mom constantly to this day puts me do n and mocks me for the things I do and I want there to be a "reason" for the way that I am

[@Katsby83]

It’s great to learn about autism self diagnosing. I’m not on the spectrum, at least that I know of, but I do have diagnosed depression and anxiety. I think self diagnosing is a great start but I find that it can be kinda trendy, in regards to depression at least, and I think that people who are staring to diagnose themselves they should consult someone in the medical field, or start with a therapist. Identifying that you’ve got a problem is the first step but if you’re not seeking out any help, I do find myself starting to doubt. I always tend to believe them because it can be super damaging to have your pain be labeled invalid, especially if they’re actually suffering. - wow. This got really long and I used wayy too many commas. I hope this made sense. Thanks for the video!

[@sarah3412]

With depression there is medication to low down their depression level(i am also diagnosed with depression). With autism we dont need medication. Maybe just therapy which with my therapy it's sucked! And mental illness are more easier(as in easy to accept that people can have depression) and openly to get diagnosed. With asd it is super hard(u need to be born autism being an adult who didn't get the diagnosed as kid is WEIRD and RARE at least in my country). I went to hospital to get refer to get ASD assessment and the Dr (At the general hospital) was like "what is ASD?" I did explained it. Then they totally ignore me.

[@Katsby83]

@@sarah3412 I’m so sorry you had that experience! Being ignored by health providers is terrible.

[@littlegreengamer]

I was never diagnosed until age 19. All these years, I thought it was my fault that I couldn't socialize or pay attention to things I found extremely boring. It has a few redeemable qualities, but I don't exactly consider it a "gift." And thanks for bringing out the part about self-diagnosis. People don't seem to realize the benefits of doing that.

[@bridedavis5152]

I think there is a risk of getting it mixed up like I thought I had autism but it turns out it was just cptsd symptoms overlapping, that being said I’m still glad I misdiagnosed myself , to myself and did research as lots of things that help autistic people help me , I do think it’d be a problem if I went around saying I’m autistic and speak for autistic people cause I don’t and I didnt and I knew there was a chance I wasn’t actually autistic

[@DellenoftheDell]

Hearing this makes me feel so much better. I’ve had suspicions that I’m autistic for the last few years and I’ve done so much research and cross examinations, talking to and listening to autistic people about their experiences, made list after list of traits I’ve exhibited since autism, taken public ally available screening tests obsessively. I’ve always struggled with social and sensory issues and I’m just starting to realize that there might be an explanation for it. The chances are pretty significant that I’m autistic but it went undiagnosed because I did extremely well in school. Self-diagnosis isn’t just someone seeing a Tik-Tok and being like, “wow, I identify with that! I must be autistic!” Though sometimes it is, it isn’t nearly as common as people think it is. I am also in the US and not only is getting diagnosed expensive but the bit about discrimination is absolutely true!!! It is still a serious problem and I have been told I can’t be autistic because I did well in school and that’s! Not! True! I’m frankly not even sure if I would want to get diagnosed in the first place because there is still a great deal of discrimination against autistic people, both US and abroad, and it’s really scary… I’ve been very lucky to be able to achieve accommodations without professional intervention, so diagnosis wouldn’t do a lot for me to begin with. I just don’t think that the world is friendly enough to autistic people in general, and the idea of that being legally attached to me worries me that it could have negative repercussions. Anyways, thank you for making this 💚 This is such a strenuous process and having people like you to learn from is so very very helpful.

[@victoriagibby8069]

As a 20 year old woman who has been struggling for years to afford at ADHD diagnosis. Thank you for your acknowledgement of self-disgnoses. ♥️

[@JoraAustin]

As a 28 year old woman, it took me 27 years to learn that all the "weird" things about me that annoy other people and make my life difficult are because of ADHD. No, I haven't had an official diagnosis from a psychiatrist yet, but I spoke with my GP and therapist and am now on medication for my symptoms. I have a lot of health issues so money is a huge factor in considering getting another doctor involved in my life. That makes getting an official diagnosis a bit intimidating. But like... the signs and signals are ALL there. So I just want to say this video was very affirming for me, even as someone outside of the autism community. For a while, I wondered if I was autistic, and then I learned there's just a lot of cross-over between the two disorders. Your videos are helping me better understand things about autism aaand things about myself, and I want to thank you for that.

[@brittlamarOfficial]

Wow. Same story. Please read mine

[@katnightingale9707]

I’m frustrated because my mom has been saying she thinks I have Asperger’s/autism for a couple of years now and I’m pretty sure her only reasoning is that I’m the only kid she vaccinated and I’m a bit socially awkward from homeschooling half my life. That said, as I talk to people on the spectrum and listen to them on the internet... I’m not so certain she was wrong anymore? If she was right I’m never telling her, it would just add more confirmation to her already deep-rooted anti-vax stance.

[@ally-gy5xi]

yikes thats a rough position

[@mbm8404]

I was recently diagnosed as autistic by my PTSD therapist. It hit me like a brick because I’m 52 and semi-retired vet of the Iraq war. So not an “official” diagnosis but I don’t need one at my age.

[@izeltavallai8147]

"dont be nervous" me whos looking into an anxiety disorder diagnoses LMAOOOO

[@idiotsmidiot3666]

Bahaha I have 3 of those. It will be okay. It will be a weight off of your shoulders once you know :)

[@busterfly131]

The video of you doing online quizzes would actually be so interesting and impactful! You're right there are so many out there and it would be useful to hear how it relates to the dsm diagnostic criteria or evaluations you went through. Thanks for sharing your perspective on this topic!

[@7delaney]

Whenever I tell my mom that I want to get tested for even a small thing like anxiety, she yells at me and says I'm crazy. I would never be able to tell her that I wanted to get diagnosed with autism, she would be so mad at me for even bringing that up. So, ive kinda never had any other option than to self diagnose. Your videos are so helpful, thank you so much.

[@ascendednightingale2456]

You should not “want” to get diagnosed with anything. This is a very weird trend that only happens in relation to mental disorders. No one wants to be diagnosed with any other issue. Cancer, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. But I see people congratulating others on here for getting an autism diagnosis. Like it’s an accomplishment to have it. It makes it seem like it’s something to strive for, and that’s very unsettling.

[@ConfusedBean777]

@@ascendednightingale2456t’s not about wanting a disability it’s about needing accommodations and/or medication that aren’t available without a diagnosis. People are congratulated because of how hard it is to get professionals to correctly diagnose so that people can get the help they need. Most people don’t want a diagnose unless it’s accurate. I don’t want cancer, that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want to be diagnosed if that diagnoses was accurate so I could have it treated.

[@filipeflower]

@@ConfusedBean777 Thank you for that explanation.

[@janineburt9697]

So I tend to agree with most of what you said. I wanted to add that if you have capacity to have an assessment I do recommend it because there may be a different or additional diagnosis which better reflects you and can help you better. Our two boys have both ASD and ADHD and the ADHD would not have been picked up without an assessment and ADHD medication has really helped them get the most out of their therapy sessions and learning to self regulate.

[@valeskapicado4656]

I'm a 52 year old woman and I'm not diagnosed yeat. I would like to bem diagnosed because I'm tired to explain everything about myself to everyone. I feel like I am an alien from a asteroid called B612.

[@Aethelhadas]

what does 5612 means? i googled and it's a selfie app? is that what you're referring to?

[@valeskapicado4656]

@@Aethelhadas B612 is the asteroid of the Little Prince from Saint Exupery's fiction book.

[@valeskapicado4656]

@@Aethelhadas Asteroid B612 is the place where lives The Little Prince (Saint Exupery's book). I used as a metaphor to say that I feel like an alien.

[@Aethelhadas]

oh I get it now, thank you!

[@ynntari2775]

exactly

[@jordyn2896]

thank you so much for making this video. i live in NZ and although we have healthcare, we're seriously lacking in the mental health department, especially for adults. it's about $130 - $160 just to see a therapist and most people can't afford that, you basically have to be ready for a strait jacket before the government wants to help you with a diagnosis. in these situations where people are desperately struggling with mental illnesses they can't explain, a self diagnosis can be helpful to help us work on addressing our mental illnesses, especially when there's such a feeling of hopelessness or a feeling that we're making it up and no one will believe us because we can't afford a diagnosis. i hope this can change one day.

[@polonypolonypolony]

YES! I'm 50 and between psychiatrist appointments for being diagnosed. I need diagnosis because I'm too sceptical about my own bulldust. BUT: - Professional diagnosis can be really useful because they may consider stuff you never thought of. Psychiatrist sent me for a sleep study which found I have sleep apnoea, and I'm probably Autism/ADHD cocktail. - It can be really useful if you can show psychiatrist your school reports from primary school.

[@arlynkate3396]

I love your presence, I’m currently based in Vancouver and watching your videos has opened up to looking more into myself. The Diagnosis here is atleast a grand as an adult. During high school, I came across a book called The curious incident of the dog in the night time, being the first time I came across Autism Spectrum Disorder. (I’m turning 23 now) I had related to the mental understandings of the main character but growing up in through societal views, I brushed off .. But lately, through platform and the personal education that you’ve provided has given, you’ve given me the courage towards seeking diagnosis in hopefully bettering to cultivate a world & relationship with myself in a new direction through self understanding & knowing how to be towards myself. I’ve always truly felt alienated because I’ve had the need to understand the why, the truths, the workings of everything around me, this world and it bothered me to point of mental breakdowns but through watching you, I’ve been kinder to this being of mine. Thank you Paige🤍🤍🤍🤍 you’re truly an earth angel🤍

[@kpaxian6044]

I am in Vancouver too. A diagnosis cost here is generally $2,500 to $3,000. A doctor told my mum I presented as autistic and fit the diagnostic criteria when I was little, but I don't have any paperwork as such showing the diagnosis at this time (if my mum ever kept it...not sure), and so I am questioning if I should put out $3,000 for an assessment. For other issues I have such as ulcers and migraines...even after they were diagnosed...the doctors did not do much that helped me. I had to change my entire lifestyle to treat the ulcers as my doc didn't even give me antibiotics (just the PPIs) and the triptans they gave me did nothing....so basically with everything I have ever had, I had to find ways to help myself. Losing $3 K when doctors have never really helped me cope or overcome other issues makes me a little apprehensive, especially since I was diagnosed as a child, apparently (no accommodations...and not told anything until I was an adult.)

[@aubreybrown1480]

Hey, congrats on the following! You inspire a lot of us ❤️

[@hannahg.8572]

I think you make an excellent point about diagnoses not being available to everyone, and that it can often be very hard to come by an accurate diagnosis, but I have to admit, I do place a lot of value in them. I do live in a country with socialized medicine, though, where it is definitely possible to get a diagnosis affordably, so that probably has shaped my opinion. What I wanted to point out is that when someone is skeptical of self-diagnosis (like me), it doesn't necessarily mean that that person is just trying to put someone down, there can be various reasons I personally find understandable. If people do it with the awareness that it may or may not be real, that's a different thing entirely, but when people take what is all too often essentially a guess as actual fact, serious problems can ensue. People very often incorrectly self-diagnose, then stop trying to find an answer because they think they already have it, and therefore don't find out the actual cause of their problem. I think this is incredibly dangerous. I have family members who for years thought their constant stomach problems were "just lactose intolerance", until they were actually examined and it turned out it was coeliac disease all along. All those years, they were eating foods that were damaging their intestines and raising their risk of cancer because they self-diagnosed their lactose intolerance. I think a certain amout of skepticism to self-diagnoses is entirely warranted (just, obviously, don't be jerk to other people).

[@Yuwa-Li]

I love this video because I’ve been wondering and watching videos since like 2018 if I’m autistic. Even when I was around 11 or 12 when I first sort of heard about autism and Aspergers I related a lot to it but never brought it up to my parents because I had previously brought another concern up to them about my idk mental state (???) and they laughed it off😅I’m in my 20’s now and have done a lot more digging and really really feel in my gut that I am, but don’t have the money to move forward but don’t want to bring harm to the autism community by just going around saying I’m autistic without a doctor diagnosis🥲Thank you for this video before so so many reasons that I just don’t have the words to say🥺

[@danileanneVO]

Thanks for posting this Hun! I'm Canadian to (28), but based on the lack of knowledge on autism in girls, and my family not believing their children could have anything atypical about them, I was never diagnosed as a kid. I started making the connections when my own daughter was diagnosed ASD and I realized she was just like me. So much started making sense. Now I'm speaking with my doctor and they agree, but I'm not sure if go through the formal clinical diagnosis process at this point or just roll with it lol I mean it's been 28 years already....

[@audreybennettactor]

I love your videos! You have helped me learn so much and I’m excited to keep learning more!

[@lindaparker4709]

When I started going to therapy my therapist told me that my diagnosis was really just something needed to show insurance, school, and my parents why I needed help. She said the important thing for me was figuring my symptoms and how to manage them.

[@jademarie27]

Also with bad stereotypes and people who want to “feel special”, some say that they have disorders when really they just have small traits esp with OCD

[@rainbowkittycat627]

Even though I was clinically diagnosed with ADHD, this video helped me think that it is ok to ask for accommodations because it will help me even though other people in my life say that I shouldn’t use those accommodations because I am actually “abusing” them. So thank you, your words are helping me through that.

[@thefluffyaj4119]

thank you so much for this. I'm officially diagnosed with adhd and im self diagnosed with autism. I've tried to get someone to diagnose me or atleast give their professional opinion and my therapist (a very old white man. for context I'm nonbinary but I'm afab) said I don't have autism because I was too considerate and looked into details about certain things, specifically social behaviors. but I got a special interest is psychology specifically to understand what was going on with myself and to understand other people better bk I wanted to know how to interact with them and understand them. i neither have the money, energy, nor time to get diagnosed and being afab as well as living in the usa (shitty healthcare, even worse mental healthcare) just makes it harder. getting diagnosed is a privilege in most places, people need to realize not just anyone can waltz up into a therapy place and get a diagnosis just like that. I'm very very lucky to have even gotten my adhd diagnosis at a young age, especially since I'm afab, because afab people also have trouble getting diagnosed with adhd. I'm very happy for those that were able to get their diagnosis despite the challenges. if I could get diagnosed I absolutely would, but I'm 19 now so I think if I ever had an opportunity to get diagnosed then I've already passed it. hopefully my adhd diagnosis accomodations can get me most of my needs met

[@muttsbefantastic900]

I have been watching so many different women with various experiences etc. I am really appreciative to you opening the door for me though.

[@YaGotdamBoi]

I’m only self-diagnosed (for now, I’m working on trying to get literally any kind of legit assessment in New Mexico, I might end up having to take time off work and travel, who fucking knows with our shit tier “only rich states get resources” system here in the US), and for my entire life, musculoskeletal anatomy and EVERYTHING psychology have been two of my special interests. I don’t take this lightly. I’ve felt along and wrong and broken and like an alien my entire life, and ASD perfectly explains all of my habits and tics and meltdowns and shutdowns and literally everything else that I’ve been experiencing my whole life. I take learning about psychology very seriously, probably would have done several degrees in psychology if I had had a “proper” diagnosis earlier and therefore had any of the scant US accommodations available to me to support me furthering my academic career. So yes, I’m self-diagnosed, and as an AFAB person, I’m honestly terrified that if I even somehow manage to secure an actual adult ASD assessment, it’ll just be some old white dude assessing me from stereotypical male standards and will just write me off like everyone else has my whole life.

[@Trippy_Space_Bunny]

37F and have been self diagnosed for about a year, in the states, not sure if I will ever be able to afford to get a real diagnosis, also trying to make an appointment for anything is a master class in my nervous frustration and self doubt. However this past year has been eye opening, from how every tiny thing i do or don’t do is connected to my autism, to how to reorganize my house to make it easier to live my everyday life even if I can’t remember what I ate yesterday or the fact that as soon as I sit my glasses down they are dead to me. I just about never leave my house and so online interactions are the only kind I get to have for the most part but the online community is the first time I actually felt that I belonged to anything. I say that I watched a girl on youtube break down the dsm-5 and was blindsided with the reality of my autism but after a year of seeing/listening to/reading others autistic lives and how they handle the day to day is what really solidified the certainty that I am Autistic (even though I still go to feeling like an imposter during meltdowns 🙄 stupid brain). As for resources not sure there are any resources I can get so not sure how my self diagnoses is going to take away from anyone else. My parents are sooooo not the type to help, when I told my mom a few months ago she said “I thought you might be adhd when you were a kid, because those doctors gave you vaccines and ruined my perfect baby”. That statement from her put a whole shit ton of my life into persecutive and I think the fact that I didn’t really see it coming and that my reaction was to say ok and never talk to her about it again kinda proves my point. So I could have been diagnosed when it would have been free for me to do so, I could have gotten the help I so badly needed through school but nah mom didn’t think I “needed to be feed poison pills for no reason”. Well my husband and I are taking a very different approach with our daughter because I’ll be damned if she has to deal with all the disadvantages I have had to. I am also extremely grateful for my supportive husband who has been dealing with new self revelations every week (like turns out I’m Bi (and really should have seen that one years ago)) and helping me to overhaul our entire house to make it brain friendly.

[@geoff5623]

re: resource scarcity There really aren't any resources that have limited availability even accessible to someone with a self-diagnosis, so self-diagnosis *can't* take those resources away from people with a clinical diagnosis who may "need it more".

[@chatterboxbudgets]

Oh I needed this video. I have had the thought before that I may be Autistic but even considering it felt unfair & disrespectful of those who have been clinically diagnosed. Then last week I was talking with someone who asked me if I've considered being tested & it felt like being given permission to consider it. I was diagnosed with OCD 20 yrs ago & while I definitely have OCD tendencies, that diagnoses doesn't explain everything that goes on inside my head. I started learning everything I can about adults with Autism & it is such a relief to learn that there are others who forget to eat or who can't wear socks or who get completely thrown off when someone makes the smallest change in their routine at work without telling them ahead of time. I realized that waiting to learn more until I have an official diagnoses would mean being miserable & suffering unnecessarily, while learning more from people who are diagnosed is helping me make changes now that are improving my mental heath & at the same time supporting people who are officially diagnosed in a small way thru KZbin & other platforms. I was more productive around my apartment yesterday than I have been in months & that's after just a few days of research & learning & listening/watching. Thank you Paige & all of you who share thoughts & experiences here...it means a lot.

[@annabellewilson0101]

I am almost sure that I'm on the spectrum but it's hard because whenever I bring it up to my mom she gets annoyed because she thinks I'm self diagnosing. And, I mean yeah I am. I know myself, I have done my research. It seems kinda like she doesn't want to believe it. I think it scares her.

[@josephmartin1540]

I am 65… had to comment after you said your life was 57% easier after you’re diagnosis! I could feel that one and sometimes calculate exactly that way! My diagnosis is still “you’re weird,” though, by the book ADHD, ASD, OCD, CPTSD and possibly some other things that end in “D.” It would be extremely difficult for me to get official diagnosis (though professionals use all these terms for me)… but sometimes techniques to help these issues help. Meds for ADHD, help that a little, but appear to aggravate the other issues! Carry on, little sister!

[@anthonykevin3683]

*I found the perfect treatment for hirsutism and pcos issue on youtube, he also helped my 6 year old daughter with Autism #Drisibor Alternative Herbs and Cleanser, Stop facial hair growth and irregular periods within 3 weeks and my daughter has really improve positively I feel so happy

[@JennaGetsCreative]

I absolutely agree, most people self-diagnosing are just trying to figure themselves out and make their lives easier. I wish we lived in a world with the resources for everyone to get the help and "pieces of paper" that we need, but that's not our reality. I also think it's ridiculous how many people are against self diagnosis but accept all of the LGBTQIA+ identities. So people can figure out and tell you that they are definitely this other orientation or gender that isn't what they were told they were as a kid but they can't also tell you and by the way I have (mental health condition here) or I'm struggling with (symptom here)?

[@Lauren-us7ju]

Hey Paige! I am a 22 year old female in the US. I actually self dxed autism after seeing you on TikTok. I brought it up to my therapist, who agreed I could be on the Spectrum. I have a formal diagnosis of Autism and ADHD now, but prior I never told anyone I was or thought I was autistic. I was too worried about people saying I just wanted attention or worried that I would offend individuals who are actually autistic. Ultimately I think self dx can be a good thing. If I had not, I never would've received a formal diagnosis and would continue to struggle and not know why. I consider myself very fortunate to have been able to receive a formal diagnosis. It is very expensive and difficult to get assessed for autism in the US, especially as an adult. Thank you so much for your content on both TikTok and youtube. You are educating about autism and helping a lot of people.

[@blackvelvet3795]

I (allistic) just realized that I have been doing a type of stimming all my life. I plug around at the seams of my socks with my fingernails and pull out the tiny threads. I have a very distinct memory from being a toddler and lying around in my bed, alone, and doing the same thing to a wool blanket. I know that I was alone and that I was supposed to go to sleep, and I did it as a coping mechanism. And I do it to this day, all the time, mostly with socks, but also other fabric, or textured hair ties. This realization suddenly made me understand stimming among autistic people SO much better. Like, this kind of plugging makes me feel so comfortable and safe and I do it whenever I can, I often carry around socks in the pockets on my jacket, or have some lying around in my bed to do it while watching Netflix. I would be so pissed if somebody would try to take that away from me or shame me for it, just because other people might find it weird.

[@faeriesmak]

My son picks threads out of his socks as well.

[@CostSteam02]

This. Video. Helped me out. so much. I've been so afraid about the legitimacy of my mental health and whether or not I even deserve to push for accommodations if I'm not clinically diagnosed. This video applies to so much more than autism, thank you for making it!!