I'm really sad.

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[@kateraridon5607]

The best advice i ever got was; “just because the person next to you is in a full body cast, doesn’t mean your broken arm doesn’t hurt.” youre allowed to hurt while other’s are hurting too. you don’t have to stop hurting bc someone else is hurting in a different way. you’re valid colleen.

[@adrim5143]

Omg I love this!!!!!! Thanks for sharing! ❤️

[@annabellajoe900]

That is true and I could not agree more!

[@jenna6128]

Someone once said that “crying is how people express emotions they can’t explain”

[@marymc7068]

Also crying produces oxytocin which actually calms you and makes you feel better. It is your body working to help itself ❤️

[@RosyRosie42]

But my goodness, would it help if I knew why I was crying! If I could explain it, or knew the reason why I’m welling up, I’d feel better 😞💔

[@Hawksgirl21]

Totally!!!

[@gall2218]

And crying is good for your eyelashes

[@adrim5143]

@@gall2218 Yay! We love a beauty guru ❤️ lol we learn something new everyday!

[@ButtersTheBean]

The crappy thing about depression is that the sadness doesn't have to make sense. Logically you know that you have nothing to be depressed about, but the chemicals in the brain tell you otherwise.

[@kimmiekins]

This is so true🖤

[@kenzeebellamy6027]

never fully understood something so much i woke up the other day and cried because i was sad but i dont know why

[@amandalane2774]

Yeah feelings are feelings

[@SallyCaroline91]

Exactly. This video actually helped me, “oh it’s not just me”.

[@futuristiccat5636]

She was depressed because she was pregnant here............. :(

[@catherinevonhemert2405]

“Don’t cry cause someone has it worse” is just like saying “don’t be happy cause someone has it better” feelings are feelings and you should express them sad or happy it’s natural

[@Amanda-no8ks]

I love that saying that's just so ensuring

[@jennavee7528]

i've always looked at it the first way i would tell myself stop crying or stop feeling bad for myself when others got it way worse it's how i got thru things but i never looked at it the other way this will be one of those quotes that i'll remember forever thank you ❤️

[@sabrinaelaine952]

EXACTLY

[@gracieharrold2857]

This is a great point. I’ve never heard it said this way before. This will stick with me forever. Thanks.

[@boyinthesarcophagus]

Preach!

[@atyourcervix3822]

In the teeny chance you’re feeling brave to look at the comments... you’re doing okay. Everybody is in the same boat and it’s okay to feel sad sometimes, just take the time to remember this won’t last forever

[@anneso8886]

Hi Olivia! You have no idea how much I needes to read this ! You made my day better. Thank you for existing 😊 and you too you re rocking it!

[@mayasjurset115]

it sure does feel like it did and I feels like there is never going to be an end

[@lucy.e05]

hi Olivia, you’re so sweet and thank you for taking your time to write this. This made my day and I’m sure it will make many more 🥺 thank you! x

[@jacquelineunderwood8478]

I know I am watching this crying over similar reasons

[@biancamr2698]

Is that a bouvier des Flanders in your profile pic?

[@savannablayze]

Just because there are people that are going through “ harder situations” does not mean Your feelings aren’t valid. Your. Feelings. Are. Valid.

[@Alicia-wq2fs]

@@lunarqi because it's relative. What's hard for you may not be for me. The point is pain is pain. If you're going through something difficult, that's valid, it's your experience. It doesn't take away from the fact that someone else is also going through their experience of pain. It shouldn't be a competition.

[@lexijade1317]

@@lunarqi because Colleen thinks that other people situations are harder than hers we’re all going through different things and something that may be hard to someone may not be as hard to someone else or something that may looks really hard may not be as hard as they think, do you get it?

[@kggroom]

Yas!

[@ruthelizabethphoto]

The biggest thing that stood out to me is Colleen saying "nothing has happened to me". We are living through a global pandemic, that is scary and overwhelming. It doesn't matter what your life status is...this is effecting everyone. Something is happening to us. And It is okay to be sad and cry, not really knowing why. That's what depression is sometimes. It breaks my heart when people can't see that their feeling are vaild. We need to start normalizing that a "good life" doesn't erase mental illnesses or struggles.

[@jennabaker7824]

If it hurts, it hurts. There’s no scale on which anyone situation is “worse” than anyone others. It’s okay to feel how you’re feeling, love. I just know how you feel and it’s okay. ❤️

[@zoe_alband]

Colleen, as a trained therapist you need to understand that your feelings are COMPLETELY valid. Even though you are privileged, even though people are going through stuff way worse, you have feelings, you still are allowed to have feelings and talk about feelings and EVERY single feeling you have is valid. Just as you are teaching Flynn I think you also need to teach yourself or find a therapist to help you. 💕 sending love

[@dorachan68]

Thank you for writing this. Save me the work, haha! But seriously, I have been watching your vlogs since the beginning of the pandemic, and it breaks my heart every time hearing you say that you feel like you don't have the right to feel sad or negative. Because it is not true! It's okay to feel things, we are humans after all! I used to beat myself up for feeling jealous or sad sometimes, and my bf would say: So you're making yourself feel bad because of the fact that you are feeling sad? Huh? This doesn't make sense. What he means is that it is not right to guilt-trip yourself for feeling sad, not only does it not help you feel better, it is not fair! So please, don't deny it when you're sad, don't blame yourself either. Feelings are feelings, you shouldn't set happiness as your final goal, but let different emotions take control so you can process different things in life.

[@vlenn_6897]

I hope that colleen one day realize that crying is okay and she wouldnt underestimate herself. We love you :)

[@joannacockings6194]

you are a good person

[@jadepillsbury6766]

Yes she needs to read this

[@morganmacon]

I feel like she knows but sadly I have seen post complaining about her crying (like what how are you going to get mad for someone having emotions) I feel like she is moreover just nervous to see THOSE kind of people. But I 100% agree, it’s nice to see someone with such a big platform express their raw emotions. If anything I feel like a lot of us can relate to how she is feeling, like we have privilege of staying home but still are dealing with the mental side effects. It’s funny cause I wonder if she even knows how helpful it is for us to see her be so real :)

[@sylviaamavisca2867]

There is no shame in crying. This whole thing sucks for everyone. We can’t compare ourselves. She should find a way to get herself some “me” time. When a plane goes down we always need to put your own oxygen on first! Her in Rachel or Cory could do crafts (color me mine kits, etc.) at a park. It is so hard, speaking from experience. I took a solo walk and am talking a hot bath. Take care of yourself!!! You are worth it and worthy of it!!!!!

[@BffKLAM]

It’s like she knows it’s ok for everyone but herself! Which is sad because her putting herself down is doing the opposite of teaching people, and more importantly Colleen, that it’s ok to have emotions and you don’t have to put yourself down or de-value your feelings in order to be heard and validated :(((

[@apatheticamortentia]

I understand you Colleen. Sometimes I just start crying. Everytime someone would ask, “Are you okay?” or “What’s wrong?” I would never have an answer. Dealing with mental illness or being neurodivergent can make us feel weak or less than, but know that you are strong & wonderful, & that we love you.

[@sp1cyn0va35]

Yeah when someone asks me those questions when I’m depressed it just makes me start crying and idk why

[@m.nplayz8914]

This is so lovely

[@robynmcandrew3555]

I cried when she talking about crying with Flynn

[@pjandbolt1399]

Me too 😭

[@robynmcandrew3555]

@rosy closy have u seen what happens?😩about her baby?

[@futuristiccat5636]

@@robynmcandrew3555 probably why she was depressed since she was pregnant here which is a symptom of pregnancy

[@robynmcandrew3555]

@@futuristiccat5636 I know I feel so bad for her I am still crying for her 💔😢

[@futuristiccat5636]

@@robynmcandrew3555 yeah :(((((( and now she lost the baby :(

[@meli41995]

You‘re teaching Flynn that it is ok to have and show emotions. So you should take your own advice. I see you, Colleen. You‘re so strong.

[@nayy_ira6697]

u have 582 likes

[@_SadButRad_]

I’m sitting here wanting to cry with her because I understand her frustration. Colleen, you’re totally making sense!! I just hope this is soon over for us and everyone else.!!

[@maddieehat5542]

it’s okay not to be okay. you’re not whining or annoying, you’re human. being open and vulnerable is not easy, and i applaud you for doing that because it helps people more than you know. keep going beautiful, you’re doing great. 💙

[@brooklynsult6973]

can we all take a moment for the middle part colleen said she couldn’t rock but currently is ✨

[@matts_dreams]

cry, vent, talk, feel it, we’re here for you. You’re not alone, so many people can relate to this. Not everyone has given up staying at home, thankfully. Thank you for doing your part. Although we may not ever go back to the way we were, there will be an end to this pandemic. We’ll get through this, thank you for taking us w you 💙💜💕

[@taetaetalks6890]

Yesssssss!!!!! So agree

[@raeperonneau4941]

Colleen, you said it perfectly... I think we’re all missing “life.” This has been super hard for almost everyone in a myriad of different ways. Be easy on yourself. I think many of us are hitting the breaking point. We’ve just got to keep putting one foot in front of the other and this too will eventually pass.

[@emilie4926]

i totally get how colleen is feeling. everything is so mentally draining at the moment and hard to deal with even if you have everything in the world you possibly need. it is okay to cry and talk about it, makes me feel less alone that i am not the only one feeling this way. stay strong!

[@carolinar316]

The sad part about society is that we have to feel that our feelings aren’t valid because of our privileges. That’s gotta stop..

[@gracedumais5869]

Her hair is so beautiful. I know that isn’t the point of the vlog but she’s so beautiful in general

[@elianakristine5599]

Lol I saw that in the beginning

[@esthernicholson6686]

IKKK! i love the middle part, i don't at all mean this in a rude way but i think it makes her look younger!!

[@gracedumais5869]

@@esthernicholson6686 right!! I love it on her

[@sulliepaige]

Ikr and ur so sweet

[@gracedumais5869]

@@sulliepaige awe thank you!! ♥️♥️♥️

[@mackiebell2]

Your feelings are 100% valid. No matter how “privileged” you may be or people think you may be, you are still a human and you have feelings and just like you said you tell Flynn feelings are okay and good.

[@gia205]

❤️

[@rannasmithson512]

Yes, I totally agree 1000% we are all with about this pandemic it's hard on everyone and we all have are and bad days Colleen! You're not alone! We love you and all your vlogs... No matter what they're!!!!

[@imogenxcx]

You could be depressed but the richest person in the world but you are still depressed

[@bypassJo]

I feel like the definition of depression is seeing all the beauty in life and it doesn’t make you feel better. I see all the love you have for your family, your appreciation for your career and the pain you feel despite it. The way you feel has nothing to do for your ability to appreciate what you have. You have done an amazing job of making your family and friends feel appreciated DESPITE how you feel inside. You are doing your best. As someone who understands, I send you all my love and support. Hang in there, girl.

[@JBRich1]

You’re feeling what a lot of people are. I’m finally like, “Yay for introverts!” The pandemic has bern less stressful for some of them.

[@sydbrodie9923]

agreed, coming from an introvert(ish)

[@crazy_cap_mushroom]

@@sydbrodie9923 same

[@futuristiccat5636]

I think she was depressed because she was pregnant :(

[@madisonlinnihan454]

I’m an introvert and I’m going through the worst bout if depression I’ve ever had. I’m so sad I can’t imagine what it’s like for extroverts.

[@JBRich1]

@@madisonlinnihan454 I’m so sorry to hear that. Do you think it’s pandemic induced?

[@scarlettlocascio4046]

I really wish Colleen looked at the comments because she would realize how many people love and support her unconditionally 🥰

[@hallie.nelson]

Thats the truth sis!!❤️

[@jellyriver2359]

So ture

[@cedarboes2253]

So so so true, I love her 😍

[@kaylan7661]

She does look at them 🥰

[@jellyriver2359]

@@kaylan7661 no she only looks at Instagram and Twitter comments

[@willowmanger2514]

That story where she was talking about how she was crying and Flynn reacted by going “call the ambulance wee ooo wee ooo”... I literally ~ burst into tears

[@kbaylor123]

He’s not wrong! She’s hurt 😢

[@willowmanger2514]

@@kbaylor123 girl it makes me so sad 🥺 😢

[@averiesoleil]

I was about to comment the same thingg 😢

[@meldell8197]

I cuddled my baby boy at night until he was 13 and then he didn’t want me to anymore. It was the same for me! The world melted away and it was so peaceful. ☺️

[@soulfabs]

Your mental health deteriorating sounds like an emergency to me. I say this with all the love, but I feel like you might not be taking your mental health as seriously as you should. If you need “me” time to go to Target, DO IT! I know it’s a pandemic but you can quarantine after going and take tests just like Erik does for work. Please listen to your body ♥️

[@abbystephens9766]

I went through the same thing I wanted to commit suicide because I thought life was over.

[@jahnavipaki9161]

This comment section feels like a therapy session where no one judges each other and that's really refreshing after feeling sad for no reason and to know that you are not alone. I love Colleen and her audience/commenters it's like we are all a family ( This woman needs to do her hair in middle parts more. She looks so good )

[@MJ-ux3wh]

Ya definitely felt that

[@zoecoffee6601]

I agree and it so amazing that these people are supportive and don’t judge

[@jahnavipaki9161]

@@zoecoffee6601 ikr

[@laylarodrigues6210]

This comment section has made me feel better about my own mental struggles in lockdown thank you all 💞💞💞

[@jahnavipaki9161]

@@laylarodrigues6210

[@anuja.v]

I love reading the comment section today everyone’s comments are so encouraging and uplifting. I really needed this vlog today and the comments, my mom was diagnosed with cancer last week and everyday has been a blur of emotions ever since but these comments lifted my spirits today

[@Alicia-wq2fs]

Best wishes to you and your mom

[@pearl_cove07]

Oh my god I hope you and your mom are ok best wishes to you

[@annabethchase4582]

wishing your mother a speedy recovery! we are here for you

[@zoie4887]

Sending you and your family all positive vibes! Praying for your mom to have a speedy recovery:)

[@carmen5358]

I'm so sorry, sending so much love to you and your family ❤️

[@reganpatton5139]

it makes me so mad that people aren’t staying home and doing their part i’m so thankful for colleen her small part is helping so much even if it doesn’t seem like it

[@torniesloman5389]

Regan Patton I agree 100% with you because I was in a class and people needed to isolate because somebody in it had covid and most of them were all having a social mothers meeting in the park posting tik toks with about 10 people in it even though I'm in the uk it's still annoying and stressful

[@laurenlarue7791]

I literally think we're the same person sometimes. Sounds like you just need a little break. You should come stay at our ranch in Idaho for a week. Our 2yr olds could be besties.

[@MariDominguesOficial]

Lord i just felt the same watching this video! So alike me in so many ways, it’s surreal. Colleen, coming from someone who’s a lot like you in many ways, just know you have the right to feel your feelings! Just validating other’s while putting your own in the back burner will hurt you. Your feelings are so valid. I also live for the moment and i’m finding most days absolutely hopeless and a repetition. However, after facing this I remembered all the years I spent working wishing to be home and I try to be grateful for having this time to fill however i see fit. And invest in myself! I hope you feel better soon and if you don’t just know you’re on the same boat as so many of us 🤍

[@makaylaarretche9793]

You don’t need to apologize for thinking you sound “privileged” because what you’re going through is still valid!!! It’s okay to be sad and you deserve to feel your feelings no matter what they are!!! We are here for you and I know sometimes it helps to just talk about it!!! We love you and I’m sending you so much positive, loving, healing thoughts and vibes!!! I love you!!!

[@sindelscat9336]

I don't know why she thinks she's privilege anyway

[@carsonsatterfield6347]

So why doesn’t that apply to Katy Perry?

[@sindelscat9336]

@@carsonsatterfield6347 no one said it didn't

[@carsonsatterfield6347]

@@sindelscat9336 Remember “When they ask you how you are and you just have to say that you’re fine, when you’re not really fine”? She opened up about her depression and people made it a meme and told her she was privileged.

[@hardtimes9972]

@@sindelscat9336 shes a rich white woman in the usa.

[@emmabailie4562]

Just because you have privileges in your life and may not “have it as bad” as other people you’re still allowed to be sad, you don’t need a reason or have to explain yourself for the way you feel

[@katyklein8649]

That is so right!!!!

[@cyndinelson6263]

Depression doesn’t check a person’s bank account, clout, skin color or gender. It hits who it hits. No one should feel shame for that. It’s really hard to watch someone who fights so hard to stand up for others end up feeling so alone. Colleen, you are not alone. You are seen and you are loved.

[@jami1730]

EXACTLY 👏🏼

[@leahwestendorf4200]

@@cyndinelson6263 YESSSS

[@tozzilil]

Please don’t ever think your feelings are invalid because others have it “worse”. You are allowed to be unhappy from time to t8me. Just don’t let it take over and don’t be hard on yourself. Love you

[@Evaa..Mariee]

Colleen: has a break down. Everyone: heads down to the comments.

[@meimz2048]

well yeah, cause I feel like everyone is giving advice to me lmao. I mean, there are therapists in the comments 👀

[@jhonsonfrancois7094]

Why is that me though 😂

[@callmehoustie_5164]

The reason you feel like things are hard...is because they are hard. Even if you find it hard to explain how you feel, it doesn’t make your feelings in-valid. You’re doing amazing.

[@theagarcia2227]

"I'm just tired" I'm just crying with her because every day I lay down and i say to myself "I'm so tired" and I start to cry and I have to calm myself down and get up and do things but I'm so tired. It warms my heart to feel not alone even tho i wished colleen never experienced anything like that.

[@gentlespiritjw4904]

Sending you love and hugs from California. ❤

[@ashleyjohnson8248]

Thats how i feel too i work at a nursing home and i want "normal " back im just tired

[@hegegrande]

Giving you a BIG hug from Norway....

[@chrisjensen451]

I wanna give you a big hug and colleen and me I feel the same way

[@ahh2121]

same and it feels comforting

[@erindocherty1037]

I’ve been feeling the exact same way. I completely understand what your going through and how hard it is. 💗

[@peekaxu4352]

I HEAR YOU SISTER....IM OVER feeling stuck doing the same thing over and over AGAIN...

[@tommyc.767]

When Colleen was expressing her emotions and being sad it made me want to just give her a big hug

[@dennataheri8477]

me too

[@gretchenwieners5829]

Yah

[@meganr4071]

who else wants to give colleen a big hug right now and just let her know she’s going to be ok? 🥺🤍

[@aylarogers1484]

MEE❤

[@cozzyboy9739]

Meeee

[@RayneMillaray]

Doesn’t matter how privileged you are. We’re going through the most traumatic time in our country since 9/11. Not just the pandemic, but all the things going on in our country, too. It’s normal to be sad and stressed and mourning your life before this. And anyone who makes you feel bad about it is a jerk.

[@morganh9364]

Colleen... thank you for being strong enough to talk about your sadness so publicly. You don't understand how wonderful and helpful it is to listen to you vent. If you did, you would stop apologizing for it. You're amazing!

[@bookgirl7484]

Everyone feels this way. You’re not alone.

[@rondo9517]

Nah not everyone, I'm a friggin tank. This pandemic has me still doing normal things and its been wonderful, less traffic on the roadways, my morning and evening commute has been a cakewalk, airplanes have been empty so damn nice. my wife and I flew to Denver for Christmas to visit her folks and we each had an entire row to spread out it was excellent. As far as I'm concerned pandemic go baby pandemic go

[@bennyhurtado8465]

@@rondo9517 well good for you

[@patrikbodonea5528]

@@rondo9517 ur annoying and irresponsible

[@hdubby4533]

@@rondo9517 yes,bc you having an entire row to yourself on an airplane is totally worth over 2 million people dying🙄 YOU are part of the problem.

[@wolfdemon6022]

Oh boy she is not alone Edit: I just realised that I am the only comment that isn’t talking to tiger woods or is a comment for tiger woods

[@heathercollins272]

Your feelings are valid. As someone who is still staying home I can relate.

[@sophiavega3990]

Yh I have been staying home since the beginning and I can relate.

[@kstarnes]

This month has been the hardest and what has felt the like longest.

[@lisataylor6737]

Never apologize for your emotions. You are doing what's right for you and your family and that's wonderful. You feeling sad and missing people, those feelings are valid and don't let a few crappy people make you feel differently. You've helped me get through this pandemic. It's like you've become one of my closest friends and I thank you with all my heart for that ❤️

[@aimeemarie5462]

Same. I stay home still too and feel the same as her. Some days I just break down and cry.

[@flyattgyatt]

Same. I miss normal life

[@HigherThoughts432]

Cuddling your baby to sleep is an excellent way to ensure that they have a secure attachment style and Flynn certainly does so well done 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@lottiegreer6602]

Y'all, we need to create Colleen a website where we post a fan video every day about how she's impacted that person's life. That way, if/when she gets pregnant again she could "meet" fans again to remind her of a tiny bit of happiness!

[@mtotheily]

Could always just use KZbin

[@megaming7271]

Who else noticed COLLEEN HAD HER HAIR IN A MIDDLE PART!!!! She looks like a QUEEN!!!

[@weirdcity1603]

Yessss!

[@mayacarbone9100]

Yes!

[@maddi3291]

Yesss

[@faranki123]

Yasssss 👌🏻 👑

[@Queefingwizard]

More like a normal person....

[@MirandaLeacock]

I think if everyone was truly honest, most people would admit to crying and breaking down a lot. I think it's really amazing that you're your true self and show people how hard it is to be human and to navigate through life.

[@elliepratt1245]

Exactly

[@donaldreisbeck4890]

True it would be such a difrent place everyone would not reckonize how difrent people are and how well they can hide there emontions?

[@kggroom]

This!

[@michellebradford7070]

Omg that was beautiful said thank you

[@kerstynsmith12]

i absolutely LOVE how colleen shows vulnerability and the sad parts about people’s day and not just that everything is perfect on social media. that’s why i love watching her videos so much, and sure watching videos that are just happy and fun are nice, but if it’s just that then that’s when you compare and think your life is not like that. i relate a lot to what she’s going through and it’s nice to know that i’m not the only one really struggling

[@originalschlarf7808]

I’m so sorry you feel this way. You’re not alone.

[@ashebw]

GIRL...GET IN YOUR CAR...ITS SAFE THERE...AND TAKE A DRIVE. AT THE END OF THE DAY WE ALL NEED A MINUTE. TAKE A DRIVE BY YOURSELF IF EVEN JUST THROUGH A DRIVE THRU FOR COFFEE. THEN SIT IN YOUR CAR FOR A BIT AND CRY OR LISTEN TO MUSIC OR TALK TO A LOVED ONE. YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN GET AWAY AND GET THAT MOMENT EVEN WITH COVID. JUST TAKE A DRIVE MAMA. YOU GOT THIS!!!

[@annabethchase4582]

thats a great idea!

[@pimp4220]

she doesnt drive

[@mayraperez3875]

I do this whenever I feel down and it helps sooooo much! I just cry in my car and listen to music and then I feel better and keep going! Definitely a good idea

[@linseylouwho]

@@pimp4220 haha!! I thought this too. She has gone to the drive thru though. If she can find her keys and her drivers license, then maybe she could do that! 🤣❤️

[@swaclawski1]

This is a great idea! You are a great person! Just get out there see life as you are!

[@officialuncleiroh1323]

Flynns tiny jeans with his tiny merch is the cutest thing EVER

[@mariagiordano9150]

Don’t worry colleen ur not alone i think alot of us go through that i have been going through something simular and it could just be sadness but i feel like i am depressed i am not going to self diagnose myself but i do feel something thats not what i have been feeling before the pandemic and i thunk most of it if from the pandemic for most of us but its gonna be okay we r all in this together

[@fernandamena9457]

Thanks for sharing. I relate so much. I have been having a hard time as well and listening to you going through the same thing makes me feel like I am not alone

[@amandadavis5687]

It’s so sad that Colleen doesn’t feel like she can freely talk about how she feels, I watched Colleen for like 8 years now but I think anyone who watches her now even if they don’t her can tell she is being sincere. She has always documented her feelings online and that’s what she’s doing still, she’s talking on her own personal experiences! I love and support you girl and I’m glad you post your raw emotions

[@lilygrace1438]

This so so true and so sweet. I hope she sees your comment. I’m 13 and have been watching for 7 years. Love you

[@maryrush4540]

So true. And I have nothing against Eric but there’s been a couple times in the vlogs where I heard him talk about how Colleen always cries in her vlogs and he said it in a way that almost belittles Colleen and her emotions. I could be wrong, but it’s just what I’ve heard. I know he’s supportive but it just bothered me. I love both of them though.

[@itsivanamarie]

yes i love this so much Iv'e been watching here for 6 years now and this is amazing

[@Ci_araaa]

She’s the most sincere which is why I feel like I’ll always be drawn to watching and supporting her!!

[@melonmelon8572]

“I’m just tired”...I felt that on such a deep level. Had multiple mental breakdowns the other day, and ever since I have been in a haze of “tired”. I haven’t seen my friends since before the pandemic and all I do now is work on college while battling my chronic illness. You are not alone Colleen, we can be tired together. Sending love to everyone who’s just tired right now.

[@giuliacacciatore4765]

Literally same. I’m struggling so much in college while being extremely chronically ill. I totally get it. I was in the hospital for half of December and it’s just been so awful and college has been so tough.

[@swaclawski1]

@@giuliacacciatore4765 I’m sending you a big hug and lots of ❤️ love! It’s hard when you’re alone.

[@giuliacacciatore4765]

@@swaclawski1 thank you so much! hugs to you as well❤️

[@melonmelon8572]

@@giuliacacciatore4765 stay sting, hopefully you have some better days in the future. Sometimes one good day is enough to life your spirits for a while. Sending you love ❤️

[@melonmelon8572]

@arianaprincess stay strong. Loneliness sucks, sending hugs ❤️

[@HeyItzKateinCanada]

I relate to these feelings a ton. I miss family, friends, travel, concerts and life outside my house so much. Sending you so much love Colleen ❤️❤️

[@cynthiasouza3143]

I feel exactly the same way. It’s okay to be grateful for what you have and also be sad.

[@christellmelendez]

lately i’ve felt so tired and drained. I feel really like all i can do is sleep and go to school. I don’t enjoy anything anymore and feel so mentally drained.

[@carleykruse6988]

Same it’s hard right now.

[@Ky_The_Weird]

Same.

[@anneso8886]

Same but hold on someday it ll get better 💜

[@triciacspann]

SAME.

[@Putabowonitt]

Same I feel so sad and useless like even though I do stuff and go to school, work on my KZbin channel, etc. I still feel like I’m just so useless and drained

[@penguin-schluppstudio]

It's good for Flynn to learn about emotions. I, despite being female, was taught by my father to hide my emotions. Now, both my brother and I have major problems with our mental health. So good on you to show Flynn it's okay to cry.

[@InsomniSuA]

I feel like everyone gets sad at some point, especially with this whole virus it made it worse, currently I am experiencing loneliness and it truly sucks

[@broganmac959]

Just because some people have it “worse” doesn’t mean that your feelings and what your going through isn’t valid. You matter just as much as anyone els. And you matter to so many people, your friends and family and your fans. Life will come back to normal eventually. It will take a while though, you are a good person and you are trying to keep your family safe. We proud of you gurl 💕💕

[@halayosef6276]

Everyday I look forward to two things: my coffee and watching Colleen's vlogs. Why? Because I am also barely holding it together. For the past week, I've been constantly on the verge of tears. I am not a mom, I'm a first year law student and I relate so much to Colleen. The pandemic is very difficult. Mental health is very difficult. Both are very very lonely and isolating. It's so comforting to me to watch Colleen's vlogs and know that I am not alone.

[@valerievegaVlogs]

SAME.🙌🏻

[@marjoleinvanvulpen2482]

Sammee❤❤❤ you've got this!

[@shaunamariexo]

It’s okay, Colleen. I miss a lot of things too. I miss concerts, movie theaters, not wearing a mask... it’s hard for everyone for different reasons so it’s okay to feel emotional.

[@breeannwalker8309]

At least you had that, I've never even been to a concert. You'll get that back soon.

[@amyrose6992]

I definitely still relate to feeling like everyone else is back to normal. I’ll see people at parties and eating out and restaurants regularly and part of me is jealous and the other part of me is like stop being selfish people are dying because you chose to go to a party with tons of people.

[@pt1451]

Colleen I feel the exact same. Sadness doesn’t always has a reason

[@jennicalyn3542]

The only thing about your emotional talks that bug me, is the fact that people have made you believe that because you have a good life you arent allowed to have feelings and to be sad about anything. That is so frustrating to me, you can have the best life on paper and still have mental struggles, emotions and hard days. Dont let anyone make you feel like you arent allowed to feel how you are feeling. You are and you are allowed to express it on YOUR youtube channel, if they don't like it they can move along and watch someone that puts on a mask and fakes every perfect day. Those of us that watch you because we care about you and like the person you are will be here cheering you on and hoping tomorrow is a better day for you. And if its not then we will be here watching and listening to you about it not being a better day. Sending you love and happy vibes!

[@judithschoberl6431]

Period!

[@amay4203]

We all agree! If anything she's too empathetic so it undermines her own feelings and experiences

[@aaquila4668]

🍪 have a cookie guys!

[@karima5228]

Yeeees exactlyyy , we love uu colleen

[@randialexishickey1048]

This! You're allowed to feel your feelings. And you're allowed to talk about it. I relate so much to Colleen and her big sad sometimes. I'm mentally exhausted.

[@Manda_Porter]

Girl. You and Rachel need to go out for a girls weekend. Go rent an rv, a house, something! Bring games, movies, things for a real girly sleepover and just do sister time. You owe it to yourself dude.

[@jennalowe681]

aww this is a great idea!!

[@mayaengel6931]

you sharing the feeling of just strong sadness with no seen reason is so helpful. it puts me in proportions. i am not alone, people are going through things and i am not alone . love you. if you read this- u r loved !!!!!

[@sasha1720]

i just love the middle part!

[@elizabethdreger6940]

This pandemic has stretched everyone's nerves especially not seeing people and family and the touch of a person is isolating and you are not a downer I'm still following the rules except for doctors appointments and quick trips to the store and have a panic attack and come home and soon heading back to work because I have been off because of an injury. Another story there I know where your coming from .

[@chasewilcox]

The fact that Colleen is my best friend right now, even though she doesn't know who I am :)

[@alexb.3279]

Same🥺

[@analiyahgriego6400]

Sameeee

[@miamills7357]

I can relate

[@gnav_einalem8746]

Me too:3

[@calliepower2862]

HAHAHAHAHAHA this is one of the best comments i’ve seen 😭😭😭😭

[@yesenia463]

You’re not alone

[@Noffe97]

I feel the exact same way. Don't put yourself down for feeling bad ❤️❤️

[@Noffe97]

Omg like I punched a wall today because I broke down so bad and got mad at myself for not being able to get ahold of myself. And I have a blue pinky now.

[@MrMunson1980]

As someone who suffers with clinical depression, I can sympathy with days where you just have to cry, there's not a single trigger to it for me personally

[@ambergrubbs5926]

The middle part is serving and I’m so sorry you’re sad!

[@heyitskam412]

omg ikr!! so pretty 😍

[@frankiefrank3422]

I know she’s so insecure about her forehead (which is ridiculous bc there’s nothing wrong with her forehead) that’s she’s always doing a heavy side part but the middle part is so nice!

[@angebabe111]

i can relate so much with the unexplainable breakdowns i have and the way i question myself because i don't really seem to have a solid reason to feel the way i feel. i think that it is important to remember that these emotions are what makes us human and that we shouldn't apologize for feeling the way we feel.

[@mfp4523]

Colleen, I resonate so much with what you were saying about sadness. My son is 6 and juggling working from work and online school and following all the rules has been really difficult on my mental health and I break down crying sometimes...

[@marlenemhambi4758]

im a nurse in germany, working in an emergency room. and i wanna tell you, that you dont have to feel bad. i feel the same way, work helps me through this time, but its hard... people donnt wanna see me cuz im a danger to them, i get that but it feels weird to be a source of danger to my friends. feelings are feelings and they are always important and people always have a reason to feel the way they feel and one should always take them serious... it does not matter that there are people who feel worse or are in worse situations... it does not change anything for the person that feels the feelings... dont worry about people and their opinion... i feel for you... it will get better... you are so strong and i would never be able to be that strikt with the rules! be proud of yourself but also give those feelings room... they need to be felt :)

[@katyklein8649]

Danke für deine Arbeit!!!! :) Grüße aus Köln!

[@yahainHotPink]

❤❤❤

[@kbeth4848]

Thank you for what you are doing. You are appreciated!!! 🙂

[@eeebee7420]

Thanks for all you do Marlene!

[@madisontrusty343]

I never comment, but colleen the hurt an pain from your entire life has never been healed. obviously no one sees the things you have gone through. the feelings of shame, guilt, fear for feeling literally how you feel have roots. this is YOUR platform, YOUR channel, YOUR feelings, and YOUR life. I see the sadness in your eyes just as it is in mine. I suffer with severe anxiety and OCD. most days it is very hard to do anything, even the things I love. I just want you to know I see the hard work you are putting in the keep people safe and to follow the rules.

[@Eavie100]

I was going to comment the same thing.... guilt can eat away at you in life and no matter how good it is, you have to face it at some point

[@linneasolowan9796]

Honestly I love these types of videos. This one made me cry and really helped me understand how i am feeling. I have felt the same way, and it is really hard. I am in grade 11and i have really missed the whole high school experience. Next year is most likely the last year i get do competitive cheerleading and it sucks. i never got to finish the season last year, or start this one. I am supposed to be in Florida for worlds in 2 weeks. I know that people have it way worse then i do but it is just hard. and life sucks right now. My family that lives in another country, I haven't been able to see in 2 years and i have a baby cousin who will be 2 soon and i haven't even met him yet! I'm not trying to sound like i have it the worst but the pandemic has really messed things up. I just want you, Colleen, and anyone else feeling like this that you are not alone.

[@ErinOSullivan-wy8my]

I've been feeling the exact same way as you. It's very frustrating and depressing. Hang in there Colleen

[@sophie-yq3hb]

I know that a big thing you’re worried about is Flynn not being able to experience things because of the pandemic, but I think that if you looked at the positive aspects, you would feel better. For example, when Flynn gets older, you’re not going to have so much time with him anymore, and of course you are already making the most of it, but try and live in the moment more and don’t worry about the future! I know that’s hard when it’s your kid’s future though. Flynn is still benefitting and learning from being at home and he is learning in a completely new way than when he will learn outside his home. That’s still exciting!!! This quality time that you get to give him is. still. experience. Flynn is still having a great time even though he can’t go to the playground for a while or meet other kids for a while! It’s good for him to have time just with his family! This is a special thing that not many parents get to give their kids. It is hard to wait, but know that this will end. Flynn will one day be able to play with other kids at a playground. He will be able to go to the store. He will be able to go out with his mom and dad and see their faces without masks on. He will still experience everything and it is not going to affect him negatively if this pandemic means that it’ll just have to wait a while. Having so much quality family time and learning so much from his parents can only be good, so cherish him while you’re all he’s got, because soon he will make so many more friends and will be so happy, but because of these few months that he’s spent with his family, he will always have the most special and strong bond with you guys ❤️

[@irisj2264]

I agree, well-said! Experiences can be caught up on but quality family time is irreplaceable:)

[@Gmrgrl-mb5np]

I have had moments that I was just about fed up and needed some me time, but all this time I am cherishing so much more. (My twins are in 1st grade.) Not only have I grown during this pandemic as a parent but they have grown as well. They don’t snuggle with me in the recliner which I REALLY miss. Only once or twice a month I’ll get it now.

[@Sarasstorytime22]

Trust me, not everyone has "gone back to normal." Hang in there Colleen. Sending you strength.

[@Thewitchescookery]

💖 Cuddle ahead! Don't let other people shame you for this. It will make him secure, bonded, and a wonderful loving adult.

[@Shortstakk23]

samesies gurl, breakdowns are a part of my routine tbh

[@RJA703]

Hi Colleen! My son is doing the same exact thing right now. Stay strong, we will make it through! ❤

[@alliearias5849]

@RJA703 what Is it exactly that your son is doing?

[@RJA703]

@@alliearias5849 Testing boundaries and not sleeping

[@amritsingh9667]

Everything about life sucks right now.

[@melyynnnnn]

I’m glad you’re still here though, it’s going to get better. for all of us, sorry if that sounds cheesy but I hope you have a wonderful week (to whoever is reading this).

[@Suprachiasmatic]

It does. You’re right.

[@faithh667]

This is beautiful! Feeling down is ok. Thank you for sharing your feelings, it helps way more that you'll ever know! So much love to you and yours!

[@mbk3509]

I’m glad you posted this part at the end because I feel the same way as far as feeling lonely. I’ll stay strong if you stay strong 💜

[@graceteavideo]

i feel like someone conditioned colleen to think her feelings aren’t valid when there are worse things going on in the world. i just hope she knows her feelings are always valid ❤️

[@swaglieri]

it seems like such a trauma response :( it’s ok to feel without “proper justification”

[@Socltr]

Yes. The internet. Twitter to be specific.

[@amysimonbiz]

Her ex-husband (I don’t even remember the plebeian’s name). He was pretty nasty piece of work. His YT videos up until a few months ago he was still trashing Colleen even though he has a wife and I think baby. But he can’t resist getting drunk and going off in his videos. He’s pathetic and narcissistic.

[@doopdedoop13]

Girl my therapist tells me all the time, you're feeling of sadness and hurt are valid everyone one has been hurt on different levels this year and every single level is valid from the bottom too the top. So don't beat your self up for feeling bad, meditate on it figure out whats wrong, accept it and release it"

[@amay4203]

*huge global pandemic killing hundreds of thousands, injuring millions, and disrupting our normal lives, relationships and careers* Colleen: I've got no reason to be sad COLLEEN! You have so many reasons to be struggling right now and we are all in the same boat (which doesn't mean you shouldn't!)

[@slvrfrosty]

I’ve been dealing with the same thing... some days I’m anxious and sad and there’s absolutely no reason why. I just am.

[@lifeofjenz3241]

“Everything’s fine, there’s no reason for me to feel the way that I feel”... I really just want Colleen to realize it’s totally okay to feel upset or down when she feels like nothing is necessary wrong, she is an amazing human being who so many people look up to, and her feels are totally valid regardless of if something has gone wrong or not ❤️

[@Smoll_Beanie]

Exactly! I completely agree. ^^💕

[@JennaSullivan112]

When Rachel is done quarantining you gotta go have a sleepover at her house or something! ❤️❤️ or go to your parents house. Change the scenery

[@breeannwalker8309]

At least she has people, I'm doing it all alone 😔

[@kit27t37]

7:38 Same Had a breakdown and didn't even know why..

[@cutepuppy1867]

I love the middle part Colleen!!