I'M WAY TOO NEGATIVE.. CHRONIC REACTIVATED EBV DIAGNOSIS, WEANING OFF SSRIS + MORE. CHALLENGE UPDATE

*Glass Stanley straws: amzn.to/49D7Irk
*The Orchard Mason Bee book: amzn.to/4c1Mp4l
*Do Nothing book: amzn.to/3IjndsJ
Hey everyone, today I thought I would do a new years "challenge update" and talk to you all about what I have noticed after having a big discussion with my husband about my negative mindset. I live in SUCH a negative mindset that it is SO hard to get out of - So i have been (for over a week now) making an EXTREME effort to tell myself positive things when I notice my mind spiraling. I asked my therapist about this and she said it is the most important to make sure that the positive statements that you are saying about yourself are TRUE though. Not like "I am perfect, I am healthy, I am rich" but more like "I am working towards getting healthy. I am loved, I am blessed. I live in a beautiful home with my beautiful family. I have a wonderful life. I am good at asking for help" etc. Things that have a positive and hopeful, uplifting undertone instead of hopeless and negative.
Its not toxic positivity if its just filled with gratitude and hope, more about making my mental state and the path most traveled into a more hopeful one instead of hopeless. I also talk in this video about my new diagnosis of Chronic Reactivated EBV or Epstein Barr Virus. My Lyme disease test came back negative, thank god but this test came back positive and two doctors gave me the same treatments and diagnosis (i wanted a second opinion so I went to a new doctor) so I am just trying to navigate what this means for me in the future.
I also talk in this video about weaning off SSRIS (lexapro) and that if it doesn't work I will get either onto a new medication like a different SSRI or SNRI but I hope I can manage without. Also both doctors prescribed some supplements that can help support me during this transition (L-Theanine, Kava, magnesium l threonate, lemon balm etc)
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Thanks for watching!
Kristi
xoxo
HI! My name is Kristi! Welcome to my channel!
First off, I am not your average KZbin Beauty Vlogger. I do the typical Product Reviews, Makeup Tutorials, Lifestyle Vlogs and SO much more, all with a sense of humor and a bit of a potty mouth. You can ALWAYS be assured that i am giving my full and HONEST opinion. SUBSCRIBE & Join in on the fun!
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Some products are sent to me for consideration of a review. (PR)

[@debsterClarkson]

In the Irish language, there's a phrase "tá brón orm" which translates to "sadness is on me" and not "I'm sad/I am sad" and I think it's a better way to think about the emotions we feel. We are not them and they move through us

[@EricaBassi99]

That's beautiful ❤

[@angeldorr8]

Love this. Thank you for sharing.

[@user-hh9jo3xv6t]

It doesn't come naturally to anyone to have a positive mindset - Positivity is like a muscle you have to keep working it.

[@XaMarie21]

Well said. ❤️

[@XaMarie21]

@@user-hh9jo3xv6t very true.

[@jetlagandlovinit]

I was just thinking today about how you always talked about your dream of living in a house in the woods and homesteading…and you made it happen. Your dreams came true. I believe that your health dreams will come true too.

[@wership]

I think about this too but it just tells me that even if I get my dream house, I'll still have to live with me in it and be miserable 😅

[@prittyflutterbystar]

​@@wershipThat's my take away, too!😂

[@musicart2007]

​@@wershipyes! I realized that my problems will follow me into the woods. Lol she didn't fix herself with the woods she just took it all there. 😢

[@Hailey-bz2ym]

“The words you speak become the house you live in”

[@burnyhigurashi]

I'm a psychologist with cbt background and I think changing slowly to a more compassionate style of thinking about yourself helps a ton. I can see why people call cbt "gaslighting yourself" and I agree that in excess, it can diminish our pain and experiences. But being kinder with ourselves is important and, in my opinion, a must. We are so mean to ourselves...

[@burnyhigurashi]

We can, and should, think more realisticly (not empty positivity). "OK, I don't feel well right now, I'm human... I'll give myself some time to cry, feel sad and rot in bed, but I have things that I know helps me feel better, and I will try something as soon as I have my time"

[@starflower703]

I learned in counseling a great way to determine if I am being unfair to myself is to ask if I would talk that way to a dear friend in my situation. If the answer is no, then I am being too hard with myself. It has helped me tremendously to measure it by that standard, because I am very empathetic with my friends. I need to be that way with myself!

[@hh-zs5mr]

Cbt helped me so much. You’re building and strengthening new connections in your brain and weakening the ones that did not serve you.

[@frankietower4002]

Same. CBT and TFAC changed my life. I still struggle every single day, but, those tools help me to ground myself vs where I was prior to classes. I was a dead person stuck inside a body that just so happened to still be living 💔 I have the UPMOST appreciation for mental health professionals and the value they give to the world! ✨✨✨

[@keelylynn911]

Another positive phrase to help you get out of that negative funk - “Everyday and every way, I am getting better and better.” This is so powerful!! Especially if you say it to yourself in a very relaxed state. DIY hypnosis ❤ I’m going through all the same things you are mentally! You’re not alone! We got this!! Love you!

[@katie3657]

I love this! Thank you for that

[@XaMarie21]

I’m going to use this. Ty❤

[@keelylynn911]

@@katie3657 of course!! 🩷🩷

[@keelylynn911]

@@XaMarie21 you’re so welcome!! 💞

[@redruby747]

Don't work 4me

[@laurieann2714]

Most people don't realize how many negative thoughts go through their heads. I appreciate your candor and self awareness

[@user-hh9jo3xv6t]

It doesn't come naturally to anyone to have a positive mindset - Positivity is like a muscle you have to keep working it. :)

[@journeylvr]

@@user-hh9jo3xv6t The old phrase, the power of positive thinking.

[@MamaMazzola]

Girl it is true that mindset is everything but also chronic pain is REAL and truly affects the quality of one’s life.

[@shemeon]

Yeh it’s very difficult to be positive when you’re in pain and feel like you’ve tried everything. I used to be a positive person

[@Turningmylifegreen]

Did you gave Covid recently? After I had Covid my EBV numbers were off the charts, my doctor said Covid is re activating EBV for many people

[@YvesyM]

Oh YES 💯 it truly does. Its so hard to keep ontop of those heavy, dark feelings that came along with constant pain

[@kikimeonce9571]

I healed myself from chronic pain by refocusing my thoughts on how amazing i feel and healthy i am. Everyday no matter what i thought like this while i meditated and do whatever the doctor told me to do and it went away. It wasnt what the doctor told me to do. It was me. I noticed the more hopeless i felt the worst it got. Listen to your doctor but work on healing your mind and nervous system.

[@LauraBeeDannon]

​@Turningmylifegreen really? Very interesting.

[@thedivineenergy]

*I have anxiety and I'm in therapy and the last 3 weeks was brutal. I was talking to my therapist and she said something to me that really helped me. Your mind doesn't know the difference between what happens in our mind and what happens around us. So our bodies react the same in both situations. That helped me so much. I hope it can help someone else. Remember you did your best today and that was enough. 💗*

[@melanie9029]

Oh my gosh 😮 never thought about this before and it does make sense. Thank you for posting this.

[@Brezooka]

I needed to hear this.

[@juicyjas]

my husband has a chronic illness and I relate to so many things you mention in your videos ❤ thank you for sharing & being vulnerable. one day at a time 🙏🏼

[@Patti-1962]

Jasmine, I just want you to know that I pray for you and Hector so often, as I also struggle with a long list of chronic illnesses. I love how you both are so positive, and truly enjoy life and spending time with each other!🥰❤❤ (I also have a wonderful husband who I love spending time with, and who helps me stay positive as well. Being married to your best friend is everything!

[@amandadelisle6241]

I had the same thing happen when I started drinking more water I noticed my thirst came back after years of not feeling thirsty. 😊 And church helped me so much I don't care what anybody says Jesus literally saved me from anxiety depression etc. I'm so happy to hear you're trying church. ❤

[@monicameechan]

He saved me me too 🙏🏻❤️ I truly believe depression and other mental illnesse is created by satan.

[@NonaMoreau]

@@monicameechanWhat about people of other religions who are not born into Christianity?

[@monicameechan]

I only have my perspective, and in my perspective it’s satan.

[@amandaplayswow]

@@NonaMoreauThen the comment doesn’t apply to you

[@user-ep4wu3uj4f]

Unfortunately, being in the Mormon church for 20 years has ruined God and Jesus for me. I'm truly happy for those who find happiness in religion!

[@TheBetsySue]

Kristi, it really amazes me how much self reflection you have. You are able to look at yourself and your behavior from a very unique perspective. This is something a majority of people cannot do. It’s very inspiring

[@littleburps]

Don’t let anyone dim your excitement about church and the journey of discovery that you are on. It’s beautiful and bringing you joy.

[@kenziemayrae3568]

Yoi and you husbands relationship is really beautiful- being able to have conversations like you mentioned who SET OFF so many people. When it comes out of love, we should listen and consider what our partners say 💛🙌👑

[@sierrarose8860]

I totally agree, Zack’s response reminded me of something my husband would say and just made me so appreciative of kind and attentive men loving us well🥹❤

[@sarahbreen9907]

i recently quit smoking after 20 years and over a pack a day and i have had to love and be proud of myself in ways i never knew i could! the only way i quit was changing my mindset .. cigarettes didn’t add value to my life and neither is negativity toward our own self’s!! i love you and your videos! keep up the tough but good work❤

[@precious1q]

I'm so proud of you! I am trying so hard to quit. I'm down to about 3 a day, and it's been hard to just fully stop😪. I keep beating myself up every day, and then come those negative thoughts. I really felt something when Kristi told the sick plant story. Hopefully it helps

[@meemsters]

I just opened my last pack of cigs... Ughhhh

[@sarahbreen9907]

@@meemsters🎉🎉🎉🎉you can do it!!!

[@sarahbreen9907]

it’s the hardest but best thing i have ever done! breaking up with your best friend and worst enemy isn’t fun or easy … you you can do it . .. be gentle with yourself!! in 35 days i haven’t smoked 830 cigs!! good luck to anyone willing to do it!! eliminate try from from your vocabulary ❤❤

[@sarahbreen9907]

@@precious1qyour worth way more the cigs!! 🎉🎉you can’t do it!

[@JennyStone]

*The sick plant 🌱example is perfect* 🥹

[@musicxxjunkie07]

I like my therapists analogy of different drivers driving my bus. Acknowledging why different drivers are showing up, why they are trying to protect me from a situation, and thanking them for trying to help. Doesn't help me always, especially in the moment, but it's helpful to look back on a situation and understand why I felt a certain way, etc.

[@soniacisneros9251]

I love that you talk about these things that people normally don’t talk about! So proud of you. Thanks for sharing this ❤️

[@imboredwhatsnew]

I have chronic EBV too! I’ve found the diagnosis to be really helpful because there’s a lot you can do to help yourself and it makes being nicer to yourself easier. I will say people asking me “if I’m better” is getting really old. But I’m like hey I went for a walk and did my job today and cooked a meal. How amazing is that?! Simple expectations until I’m out of this reactivation

[@Geminirock6186]

Me as well! Everything in this video is what I experienced. Hearing Kristi talk about the numbers being over the 600 that the machine could read, I was jumping up and down going me, me, me! I found out about lemon balm on my own but I didn’t know about the other stuff. Definitely going to be looking into the other things Kristi’s doctor mentioned.

[@LauraBeeDannon]

Is it just a blood test the doc can refer?

[@gemmapolvani508]

The fact you are able to be so objective when reflecting is a gift in itself. You speak with such clarity, most people can't do that. You're already further ahead than you think! It took me a year or a bit more to heal from the many illnesses i was suffering with. It was incredibly difficult, the biggest test - but - with some patienceand self love I got there. Now I feel as if no matter what comes my way I know exactly how to tackle it!

[@katherinejacynthe5738]

Yesss , I reconnected with church and helped me so much :) So happy you are vulnerable and sharing as you have helped me a lot 😊 Thank you from the bottom of my heart 🤗

[@bella031003]

Every time you post on the topic you save more and more of my thinking . I have exactly the same thing as you . That itself make me not alone . My mom also died very very young. My parents died back to back . I was to thank you with all of my heart ❤️. No one I know even understands what I’m talking about . You are making a difference in people like me . I have tears coming down because you know , and I know the torture. I am going to speak to myself kindly today . Sending so much love .❤

[@suzannen.6403]

Wow. The same thing happened to me.❤

[@icecream_andcookies]

Kristi, this video has been so wonderful to listen to. Your affirmations and positivity are contagious!! ❤

[@viidz10]

You posted this on the perfect day... I spent my entire morning reflecting on my own negativity and trying to force myself to be more positive (it's a work in progress) thanks for sharing

[@HLeffy]

Really appreciated your tidbits on having and developing faith 💖I have been really skeptical too, my whole life, but decided to give it a shot a year ago and go to a Mass. One year later, life has never, ever been better and I have an AMAZING community all of a sudden. All the best to you 💜

[@jennamaguire7318]

One THOUSAND percent agree. Finding my faith through my church and the people I've met has made everything in my life exponentially better. My parenting, my relationship with my significant other, my extended family, my depression and anxiety that I've had my entire life has all but vanished. Glory to God for all things ☦️

[@allieb8655]

Affirmations are key. Like you - my subconscious has (and still is set) in a default negative self talk mode. Lately I have been saying one affirmation in front of the mirror 3-6 times when i get up in the morning for the last four days. Its been working so far! My default doesnt go to negative self talk and it feels different ❤️❤️ Reprogramming 30+ years of negative self talk will take a while - and i think loving kindness can be used here. I feel for you kristi ❤️ thank you for speaking out and letting people know they are not alone. Much love to you!

[@tinastarrie74]

Love you, girl! 💗 Don't let anyone discourage you from The Way, The Truth, and The Life. 💗

[@RossiniRei]

Thank you for being so raw and vulnerable, I am going through similar ruminating thought patterns where my brain feeds on the negativity and it's gotten me in a really depressed and heightened state where I feel like I'll never get out of but your video was so relatable and you're helping more people than you think, me being one of them. Makes me feel a little less alone bc of the digital safe space you created by putting your story out there! 🥰

[@brunom72]

dude, i just love you. i'm so glad you're in the YT space being real af. thank you xx

[@SailorYen89]

I saw a thing the other day about how there was an experiment with people who suffered from depression where every day they'd show them a grid of faces and all but one were frowning, there was only 1 happy face. And every day they had to find the happy face. Over like 2 weeks they were able to pick out the happy face SO much faster because they were training their brain to look for positive expressions rather than noticing all the negative ones naturally. It's a similar thing to trying to change your mindset to be more positive. It really can work!

[@Cottonheadedninnimuggins]

As someone who found Jesus late last year, I wouldn’t be mad if you intertwined Him at all!! So many people are starting to search for more.. yes to Jesus!!!

[@deethefosters2117]

YES!!!!

[@dheredia2789]

Amen! What would life be without HOPE!

[@lyndapeeler955]

Thank you for posting this. It's not easy to think these things, actually do them but I find saying it out loud even harder. You are my favorite KZbinr for MANY reasons and your openness and authenticity is a big part of that. You got this ❤

[@claregillies9979]

People are missing the true spice of life. To be content with what you have. I feel the world pushes us to be striving for more and better rather than enjoying what we already have. One of my favourite and most powerful sayings is that The Grass Is Always Greenest Where You Water It. The other side doesn’t have the greenest grass. Wishing you all the contentment and happiness ❤

[@niecywah6315]

Sending you positive energy, Kristi ❤

[@joellekaye]

Talking to yourself nicely helps TREMENDOUSLY. It really really does help. I am so happy to say that I love myself so much ever since I've started being kind to myself. Even if you don't mean it at first, tell yourself how much you love yourself and how beautiful you are, how you're so fun, etc and it changes your whole life eventually I swear.

[@journeylvr]

You have to be your own cheerleader. Just because a negative thought comes up, you don’t have to validate it!!

[@ann18o96]

What I personally did regarding self talk and dialog is shifting the whole idea of that. So when you worry, you're mostly in the future, when you're upset about failure or just very negative about your state right now, you're in the past. "Why didn't I do this", "what if this happens". Depression = past, anxiety = future. For me it helped to focus on the moment. It doesn't matter if I ate good or bad yesterday, the question is what can I do now? Every minute spend in the head is being passive instead of trying to fix anything.

[@ashlynmarie_102]

I don’t know why but I feel like I always watch your videos in waves and I know it’s just because of life and I get busy but every time I start watching again you bring me so much joy. You’re so honest and true to yourself and real and that’s so nice to see, I too attend church and sometimes I miss, but I know that when I go I feel better and I feel like I’m not alone in this world. Thank you for everything you share and being so open with us, your followers! I’m sending prayers and well wishes to you and your family this spring! Much love from a subscriber in Louisiana!💗

[@opaline2093]

I really took this one to heart. I’m tapering off the anxiety med I have been on for over a decade. I feel like I don’t even remember what it felt like to feel generally positive. After listening to your video I took a walk and told myself all the positive things in my life. It didn’t help at all but plants take a while to grow as you say 🌱 we got this.

[@emmao613]

Hey I’m proud of you for taking a moment to do that!! Hope one small happy thought leads to another and another ❤

[@ririimari]

You are right where I was 12 years ago (I'm 39). I had EBV that turned to mono that turned to cfs that got me a diagnosis of fibromyalgia. I tried lots of meds. I had severe dissociation, derealization and depersonalization. Panic attacks. Anxiety. Literally felt I could and would NEVER feel okay again. I'm okay, now. I have my past traumas like anyone and am still very high strung. I get migraines (they're hormonal and stress related). But my life is so much better and your life will be, someday, too.

[@RealElongatedMuskrat]

gosh this comment hits home for me so acutely that I damn near cried reading it. It felt like a long distance gentle hug. I'm so glad to hear you're doing better and I really feel so encouraged that I can be better too. Thanks for sharing this ❤ also you are so beautiful girl omg! 🎉

[@ririimari]

@@RealElongatedMuskrat thank you :) That was my hope because I remember feeling literally hopeless! And also crazy. It took me forever to even link these things to ebv and lots of times I felt I was going crazy because you don't hear a lot of research about virally triggered chronic fatigue so you just think you're dying and doctors can't figure out what's causing your dozens of seemingly unrelated symptoms. There are a ton of peer reviewed studies out there! Viruses cause cfs and some doctors just do not know or care! We don't even know what viruses really ARE & the fact is that it isn't really understood or accepted in some medical circles that they can cause long term affects but that's the truth! Even some patients of covid are having long term affects! But yes, I am recovered and it did take a long time. I'm very glad to be here because it triggered a very dark depression and bad anxiety on top of all the physical symptoms! I really hope Kristi reads my top comment; and anyone else who may be having similar health struggles. It took me 5 years to even connect the EBV and mono to my cascade of health concerns.

[@kelakela8318]

I can totally relate from a different perspective - my son is a heart transplant recipient (8 years🙏) and has now EBV levels in the millions since 11 months. He is not doing well and I feel completely powerless and almost paralysed with worry and anxiety. His doctors don’t recommend treatment and we just wait and see. I’m literally numb and lost. It gives me hope when I hear positive outcomes and different perspectives. Thank you for sharing and I am truly happy to hear you are doing better! Sending you a heart hug❤️

[@ririimari]

@@kelakela8318 I didn't have treatment but it took upwards of 8 years to even begun feeling better. I be thinking of your boy! 💜

[@starflower703]

@@kelakela8318Keep getting a second opinion until you find a doctor who truly hears your concerns and helps you find solutions. You are your son’s best advocate.

[@swayzienicole]

I really needed to hear this about positive mindset! Last month I found out my pregnancy was ectopic and I am so scared for my husband and I to try again in fear that it will end the same way the previous one did!! It is hard to remain positive sometimes but I am going to choose positivity every day!! Love your channel 🩷

[@eileen58]

I’m sorry for your loss. Wishing a healthy future pregnancy for you and your husband. ❤️

[@swayzienicole]

@@eileen58 thank you so much!!

[@starflower703]

First let me say I am so sorry for your loss. I had 4 pregnancy losses. I found an online support group for women who had a loss and wanted another pregnancy. Support from other women who understand what a loss does to us and the anxiety that comes with future pregnancy is so important. The group I joined was called SPALS (subsequent pregnancy after loss support). I made lifelong friends from this group that not only helped me through pregnancy after loss, they have helped me through the loss of my father, my husband, my mother, and cheered me on when my life started in a new direction. I am so grateful for what this group did for me.

[@Abishhhhh]

kristi is so real and comforting i come here once in awhile just to make me feel like im not insane. Love you so much girl

[@lauren3596]

Kristi, I am so happy to hear you are attending church. I have struggled with SEVERE anxiety and depression since childhood. As well as having a debilitating chronic illness. I have always been a major religious sceptic. But last year I started reading the Bible and I’m not kidding, my mental health has been cured for the first time in my life. I am so grateful, so at peace, I am reborn. Hoping this for you.❤️

[@LaRenMilano]

This is so amazing, I hope this for everyone.

[@jessmirr597]

Mindset is everything. I have Anxiety/OCD, girl I get it. Staying positive, being grateful and walking are great! Praying for the Lord to give you peace 🙏🏼❤️

[@staciaaashna]

I find your videos comforting. Thank you for being so transparent about your struggles and how you're working through them.

[@Laurel608]

Your videos help so many others; you’ve certainly made me feel less alone! You’re doing a good job on your life’s journey and it is inspiring to see through your candidness and honesty.

[@kikimeonce9571]

Yesssss christi!! For so long ive watched your videos and thought to myself man i really hope she learns how powerful she is how she creating her reality. This makes me so happy to hear❤

[@Mary-lj2uu]

I believe God knew you needed to hear that message at church, and he sent you guys there💕 happens to me a lot! Been praying for you for a long time, and will continue. It's so nice seeing you grow and learn, as I have been doing the same for a few years now. Watching your content helps so much as I try to watch less negative things happening in the world. Praying for all the best for you and your family ❤️

[@clairehawkes1112]

Yes, this is a big break through, good for you Kristi. Maybe a gratitude journal? I found it quite scary how in control I was of how my day would actually go once I realised this. But also be kind to yourself because pain is also a thing and some days there is pain to deal with, have back pain, migraines and other stuff that hinder my progress and i can only be kind to myself on those days. It will be less in time Kristi. I lost my dad when I was 9, my mum worried about me way too much and I worried too and thought I would have a bad time of it. I separated the little girl inside me from the grown up me and I learned to give her the love I gave my children so she got the love she had missed out on. I do t know if the whole inner child and mothering yourself is something you have thought about but it’s really helped me. This is great keep going you are doing great. Also , maybe find hobbies to distract yourself from your mental health and you will have hours in the day where you didn’t think about it and were absorbed in your garden or whatever ❤

[@jennifer_moss]

Giiiiiiiiirl I too immediately go into negative thoughts and worst case scenario when my anxiety goes up 😢❤

[@lindseylulla3312]

You are strong. YOU have what it takes. You really, really do. Start believing about yourself what we all already know! You’ve gone through A LOT and are a strong, reliable, and wonderful person.

[@Melody-rs7nz]

Great chat, thanks for giving me company. It is so nice to see you in this mind set.

[@Acehazen]

Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing these things. They make me feel so seen.

[@hayleynugent7710]

You're working so hard on your mental health I'm proud!! And it's helpful to see other people struggle and spiral like me too

[@calliefeezell3196]

I really needed this video today. I have leveled up in my life in the past 2 years and I’m not happier but I definitely have every reason to be. Thank you Kristi!

[@kourtnicombs7800]

Thank you so much for being so honest and open. I’ve been struggling in a very similar manner with my mental health. Watching this made me feel not so alone on this journey.

[@lobsterkitty7]

I'm so encouraged to hear you are exploring church! I have prayed for you for a couple years now ❤

[@codedresilience5239]

Kristi, you’re a great person on this KZbin platform. I’ve followed you for many many years and I’ll continue to do so because you’re so open and relatable

[@beautifulandbold7117]

Your soul came back here to help through sharing. Your health transparency has changed someone's life if not many. You make a difference. Beautiful human❤

[@LolaBlondeBeauty]

You’re on the right track, but you have to use affirmations to call in what you want in present time. So instead of saying I’m going to feel better, try saying I FEEL BETTER NOW and I feel better everyday. I am calm. I am grateful for..(fill in the blank). I promise it will shift your mindset faster. I’m sending you so much positive energy! ❤️

[@thewildinbetween]

I hope you know that what you share here does not go unappreciated. I absolutely needed this today. xo

[@Megan___]

Idk if you’ll see this but I just wanna say that you’re glowing Kristi. You have a pep in your step that I haven’t seen in a long time and it brings me so much joy. I know it’s a long journey but I can already see you’re starting to turn a corner. I noticed a huge difference for me personally in my mindset when I started using the Five Minute planner simply for the daily habit is finding things that happened each day I’m grateful for. Even if it’s as simple as what I had for dinner or something cute my kiddo did that day. In regard to the Stanley cup you only have a lead issue if the button on the bottom comes off and the lead pellet is accessible. I had to get rid of my cup bc the bottom popped off once after my son dropped my cup and I wasn’t comfortable with him having close exposure to lead if he touched the exposed lead on the bottom. Other than that they should be safe to use. We can only control what we can. Other than that the only thing we can do is our best each day. 💕

[@Rachel-ub2ms]

God I love you… feeling so lost and KZbin has changed so much. Such a comforting video to listen to on my ride this morning. It’s been a hard ass month and I just really needed this today.

[@lynnwilliams8295]

Sounds like your on the right track! You have given me some good information on what I can ask my Dr about as I have a lot of the same issues. I’m so happy to hear you went to church as I think a connection to a higher power is so important. Good luck on your journey

[@raisavlogs8877]

I am going through a similar journey of battling my mental health and physical health and I really appreciate your vulnerability. It makes me feel like I’m not crazy, I’m not looking for something wrong, and that there are things that can get better. Thank you ❤

[@LivingitwithLauren]

I am so freaking proud of you! I walk everyday - I tell myself I’m a house plant and I need sun and water. Changing mindset has been the best thing ever and walking really really helps! Keep it up love!

[@whatchyagonnado]

This concept helped me a ton when I was in my worst place. Changing my thinking from beating myself up all of the time to being proud of myself gave me so much more mental and emotional energy and is when I really felt a change in my trajectory. Doing at least one thing a day to make my life better, and then being proud of myself for my own efforts, regardless of anyone else's life or cicumstance.

[@Bitsa75]

I’m so happy to hear you have this realization. I’ve been so worried about you as your videos lately have seemed so…, well, negative. It’s hard bc I admire your transparency and it’s so rare to get a KZbinr who will let you see the hard times, and I’m certain your authenticity helps so many- but when I see you do it, I always have this feeling of wanting to save you from it. Any comment I’ve ever left on your page comes from my own experience with negativity and chronic health issues (physical and mental health struggles) and I have a decade+ on you in age and experience (I’m 48). I’ve found that beyond therapy, the most helpful thing I’ve ever done for myself is to ground/root myself in gratitude. Keeping a journal of the things in my life that are good helps me to recall those things when negativity wants to take hold. There will always be things to complain about and hurdles to face, but if you can root yourself in the positivity of gratitude, you will be amazed how that becomes your go-to and it feels so so different. You do so much work on yourself that I just hate to see you struggle, and I think it also reminds me of when I struggled with negativity so my judgment wants to point it out to you- not to chide you, but to help you. Sending you love and light and positivity and a reminder that while the things you face daily are hard, YOU are a light in this world and a very kind and good human. Remind yourself of that and Radiate!!! ❤

[@alyssazaidel1904]

One of my favorite mantras is/has been "This is where I am, but this is not where I'll be forever". I find it helpful to acknowledge the suck in the moment but also the hope and belief in myself that I'm going to be in a better place. I always appreciate your honesty and ability to be vulnerable! Loving this kind of content lately 💚

[@sierra1540]

Thank you so much for being so open. I’m about to have my 27th birthday and I relate to SO many things you’ve shared. From the hopelessness to the negative mindset to the want in finding a community within church (even if you’re a naturally skeptical person). I relate to it all. I’ve been slowly trying to take back my physical health, but it seems the hardest thing to work on is that default negative state of mind. You give me inspiration to really put in the work to change that, because I agree, things can’t keep going on this way- I refuse to spend my life feeling how I’ve been feeling for the last few years.

[@lenalenabobena]

I decided to clean up my chaotic desk while you were talking and cleaning. Love these sit and chats while we both get to be productive.

[@Veganjelibon]

I love the bee discourse!! Thank you from an entomologist for talking about it 🐝

[@stephcaravan]

This was so helpful and insightful. Thank you for always being so authentic and transparent with your followers, and for the book recommendation! Your videos help more people than you realize. Sending love from Canada! ❤

[@lindasacks8572]

I'm routing for you. You are helping yourself but at the same time helping your followers. I know it helped me. Thanks!

[@emmao613]

I’m proud of you for exploring all options for feeling better! I personally am a firm believer in the power of positive thought. I hope you see the immediate benefits too ❤

[@BibleBeauty]

You are so blessed Kristy..I’m so glad you are turning the ship of mindset around..You will be able to help so many people ❤

[@emma0x3]

So many things to say!! One, I'm so proud of you! Two, I LOVE the nature analogies, and three, the positive mindset was a great reminder for me so thank you ❤

[@ForAbsolutelyNoReason666]

I can totally relate to what you’re saying in this whole video. I think backing out of a negative spiral is so important. I do want to say though there’s a difference between gaslighting yourself with positivity and backing out of a spiral. One can keep you on the path less traveled and the other can assist you in ignoring your intuition. What you and all of us are going through is a huge lesson in discernment and listening to your heart and being honest with yourself. It’s so cool listening to you figure it out, while someone like myself is as well. It’s awesome you’re relentless in your pursuit for answers and harmony. 🖤

[@bunnylucky7]

WE LOVE YOU KRISTIE!! THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR JOURNEY WITH US!!❤❤❤❤

[@crisroberts8703]

Literally so happy to hear this from you❤

[@stefaniemiller8530]

I just love everything about you and your content. Been watching you for YEARS. This video is what I needed today…. Literally. Thank you for being my unwind time every evening.

[@lauracompton632]

I love this conversation. Hope is beautiful ❤ and freedom.

[@nasheajones5609]

I love this and relate so much! Thank you so much for sharing the journey. I am 43 years old and have very similar struggles (very) and you have helped me just by knowing I am not alone. ❤❤

[@hrickosuave]

“The day you plant the seed is not the day you eat the fruit” hangs in my office ❤

[@justjoycelyn]

I love how no matter what, you are so completely honest, and I say I am honored to be a subscriber of yours. It is very rare to find someone on the internet who is as eloquent in their skill and words, all whilst being honest. Thank you

[@Ca_1021]

This resonates with me so much. I find myself thinking negatively the SECOND I open my eyes. I started saying things I don’t even believe to try to rewire my mind as well. We got this.

[@mariejones4208]

I say, I fight my depression, because I changed the thought of having depression in therapy. My husband and I started a mantra between us to lower my anxiety and negative thoughts it’s, we do want we can, and work on the rest. It’s been helping and I am now thinking it when I need to re-adjust my thoughts. You are such a strong person. ❤❤❤

[@alexbiscardi9955]

Girl yes! Man you are really awesome. Ive been watching you over the years and this seems like another beautiful phase of growth for you. Youre one of my OGS. And everytime I come back you have leveled up with house, with kid. Its has really been a pleasure to watch what you share. ANYWAY, I have also been in therapy and this was one of my struggles and holy shit it is worth the work but whats great the hardest part is the awareness. So you are already on the journey girl, keep going, there are not a lot of people as determined as you and I have learned a lot from you. Also, in general your on top of your shit. I forget that about myself from time to time, but you are on top of this shit. Good job.

[@jocelynsloan7801]

You’re so relatable and not alone. These last few years have been hard & I’ve lost my personality and feel so hopeless sometimes. Trying to connect to my inner child. ❤

[@jessicahardin9209]

This is SO helpful and comforting knowing I'm not alone in this. Talking about the change in mindset seems really helpful advice since my brain seems to work similarly. Thank you so much for sharing Kristi ❤

[@kerrah2199]

I'm intrigued by your new journey. I wish you the best of luck and look forward to seeing where this takes you.

[@RedSmirk54]

I can't tell you how helpful CBT has been for me. I started 20 years ago and it really has changed my thinking from ruminating on "what if's" to being present and grateful each day.

[@marissaxk_]

I’m in the first 5:30 of this vid and just wanted to say that I relate to the negative mindset very much. Especially being off work and my kitty getting very ill, it was hard to stay positive when I’m already not one. The biggest thing that helped me was practicing being present (taking yourself out of the subconscious) and practicing gratitude each morning. Being positive for me felt like “toxic positivity”, but practicing real gratitude for what I have and the present moments of joy with my kitty…that has helped a ton. My hubs and I enjoy your vids and conversations, keep keepin’ it real. You got this!

[@frosting6439]

I love these clean up/ organize, chit chat videos.

[@gwenyverreking5565]

I’m so glad you were able to find a place to get hope. It’s so easy to let dark thoughts and dark emotions control us and I’m super negative too so I’m going to do that with you and not let those things take control of my mind. I’ve fallen away from church because I’ve found a lot of toxicity in it but I do miss the hope and joy it used to give me

[@hannahlee6053]

I loved this authentic video. Just to hear you talk calms me. I’m so happy to know you’re doing okay. Love you Kristi ❤

[@bridgetcoryell4588]

Have you been in my head?!?! The first ten minutes of this video could've been directed to/written by me! You are SO not alone, and we ARE blessed. I will think of you when I consciously repeat affirmations to myself 🥰 Thanks for the great video and keep up the good work!! 💜

[@Cristina-nq2oc]

I’m so glad your doctor is addressing the EBV, it’s a real thing! Sending you love and healing! I’m also on a chronic illness healing journey and can relate. I love you so much! You are so relatable and I feel like we would be great friends IRL! ❤I also love kitties, nature and pollinators!

[@BlueMoon3l3b]

So relatable. I’ve really been trying to force myself to be more positive in multiple aspects of my life. I’ve always had such catastrophic thoughts, anxiety, depression, etc. I really thinking in a more positive way is really the key to unlocking general happiness or at least contentment. Some other things that greatly impact how positive I am are things like SLEEP, if I drank alcohol in the last week (I’ve given it up for over a month now), and the latter half of my cycle.

[@PandaD2]

I definitely needed to hear the first 8 minutes. Thank you for being real and sharing extremely wonderful advice! A good mantra when you feel tired or sick or stressed is, "I'll be ok" or "It will be ok, eventually." I use them a LOT when I'm stressed. Just sharing some tidbits of my own. 💕

[@MindyGail]

This is good stuff Kristi. Mindset is really 90 percent of every battle.

[@Mackala_kl2020]

The view behind you through the window 😮 the snow and the trees are absolutely beautiful. I would do anything to sit in a room like that and watch the snow. So lovely ❤️