I Relapsed on Alcohol for 6 Chaotic Weeks (The Brutal Truth)

[@racheleast5855]

Stop saying im never drinking again.that just puts pressure on and sets you to fail.just get up every day and say im not drinking today .and when you go up to bed at night give yourself a smile in the mirror and say well done x

[@BDogs10]

.do not serve notice.. Alan Watts: ‘the Art of the Sly Man’

[@gregmonahan990]

One minute at a time

[@bristlefist]

I'm sorry but you clearly know zero about alcoholism. If it were as simple as saying "I'm not drinking today" there wouldn't be any alcoholics left. This kind of advice does more harm than good

[@Tidnull]

@@bristlefistif it was a simple as CHOOSING not drinking today, there would only one program to end them all: the "just dont drink today" program. Gee thanks, never thought about it like that!

[@emilymccartney1593]

@@Tidnull Don’t be so f**king rude. It might have worked for her!

[@leigh7507]

Well done for putting yourself out there. Anyone who is a true drinker will understand the pain of relapse and the guilt and the shame because you thought you knew better. Its a journey and I hope you learn something each time you endure your lows.

[@MakoIIe]

i am six and a half years past my last whiskey sip. Once you're really on the bottom and have enough, you will stop. Some people just need to sit on the bottom longer than others. The decision needs to be final and there has to be no more excuses. Pain is a part of life that one has to accept and stop running away from.

[@archangel_josh]

Man, thanks for your honesty. Never quit quitting. Dust yourself off, be kind to yourself, give it time, you've got a brain with 30+ days of drinking so give it a few weeks for your brain to return to normal. Like you said, eat good/exercise/sleep and after a week you should feel better. Learn from this - look into your mind in the days leading up to going away and find out why you thought it would be ok to drink. Relapses start way before your first sip. It sounds like you thought it would be ok to moderate, which is a hard lesson that we need to learn that we cannot ever have ANY alcohol. I'm 604 days sober here, couldn't go more than a week without getting wasted back when I drank. You'll be ok mate, you'll learn from this - I promise.

[@DavePoint84]

This feels too real man. The thank you for sharing your journey the ups and downs. I’m routing for you, I hit 8 months sober today and am so thankful for others putting themselves out there. It’s helped me a ton. Get back on the horse! You got this :)

[@bruno12_3]

Alcohol tricks us the first 3 drinks gives us ease and comfort. The the shit hits the fan chasing that over and over and over 😢

[@teeaymusik9811]

Yup called addiction. Alcohol is the worst drug ever, officially. So many people cant stop drinking its insane.

[@Knightcommander69]

Oh man, I fell for the just one drink over 10,000 times. Even though it always resulted in me drinking none stop until I passed out. I didn't eat, didn't work, didn't look after my son. It was a living nightmare. Worst part is you know whilst you are drinking the hell you are walking towards and you just don't care.

[@teeaymusik9811]

@@Knightcommander69 VERY well said! "Worst part is you know whilst you are drinking the hell you are walking towards and you just don't care." heck yes. But you also recognize when its time to stop, it's just very hard to do it without help. You must go into another environment, out of your comfort zone. I think thats very important!

[@HaydenPettit-dx8dv]

Agreed. My neighbour was addicted to heroin and myself alcohol. He said we’re always trying to chase that first time. That ship has long sailed.

[@happyapple4269]

sobriety gives you what alcohol promised you.

[@juliadenholm8727]

I used to care for Alcoholics on a hospital ward that were suffering severe jaundice, their liver was destroyed and they took weeks to die. From experience it's a very painful death....from drinking alcohol....

[@jamesoflaherty7332]

I'm 7 years sober . For me sobriety was not a possibility until I realized that I could never have a moderate relationship with alcohol. That my addiction was bigger than myself and out of my control and always would be. Good luck Brother

[@HaydenPettit-dx8dv]

Well done 👍 I’ve had to accept that as well

[@HXLIASMR]

You’re like me. You’ve got black and white thinking and you’re all in and all out. You go to extremes on each side of the polarity. Total sobriety/fasting/eating right the nine, then you go the exact opposite other way just as hard and shit gets messy. I know the struggle all too well. It’s a fucked personality type, but that’s what we’re dealing with.

[@luigitosti7599]

You got this buddy ! I relapsed after two years sober, took awhile, but I ended up in the same “shit pile” that I was in before. Respect from Canada, I’m 45, I just tell my friends and family, “no whiskey till I’m 60”, one day at a time ! I would say good luck, but it’s not luck, I tell myself “I don’t know if I’ll drink again, but I know that today I’m not going to drink”, helps me.

[@alexanderthegreat8617]

Stay strong brother relapsing is part of the journey sadly nearly all of us have to reach our rock bottom before we stop I’m a year clean and I understand how hard it is

[@joneljones4181]

I couldn’t stop either. I’ve been sober 9 years. We admitted we are powerless over alcohol in our lives, have become unmanageable. There are people wait you for you to help.

[@0tteru]

I know you're going through the struggle of relapse but after being a daily drinker for years YOU are motivating me. I want to get away from this shit, I know for sure that you can, and you're helping me know that I can too.

[@stanp6383]

It’s ok dude One day sober is way better then 38 days drinking Just keep trying and don’t give up on yourself Personally for me one month wouldn’t be enough time I had to do 4 months to have a total reset After those 4 months I had a few drinks and drinks didn’t taste good at all and it even wasn’t that much fun to drink like it use to

[@wwalkerproductions]

thinking you are better off drunk around your kids because you'll be in a better mood than sober is an issue.

[@Mark-eg2yd]

Generally yes but after a 6 week bender it's not something I'd condolemn him for.. To remain a drunk in front of your kids growing up is a different matter entirely.

[@Catlady12341]

No one is better off drunk.

[@DICEcommander]

That’s satan

[@harrybaker9044]

That is indeed satan. I have kids and I am an alcoholic. The voices in your head tell you that you will cope better if you have a few drinks. It doesn't work. It never works. This is the devil talking to you. The destroyer of everything.

[@stephanielake8169]

Agreed. Gaurentee you no one else thinks he is in a better mood while drinking except him

[@bryants6790]

It’s cunning, baffling and powerful. Once you know, you know and it sounds like you needed this to figure that out. Be kind to yourself. Don’t worry about the weight that will straighten itself out once you have been sober for a while 🙏🏻🌅✨

[@KimberlyJose-si2sv]

I started drinking since my teenage, got addicted to alcohol. Spent my whole life fighting alcohol addiction. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with OCD. Not until my husband recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 6 years totally clean. Much respect to mother nature the great magic shrooms.

[@DonnDenisse]

YES very sure of Dr.alishrooms. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.

[@Owemruther-hk4zn]

How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta

[@MichaelDavidson-qi7ts]

Yes he's Dr.alishrooms.Shrooms to me is a natrual healer. I know a guy who has used mushrooms in the same way and they have really helped him. mah dudes have safe trips all.

[@PriscillaLogan-by9ll]

From my experience it really works excellently! It doesnt even need to be a full hit. With potent shrooms 2-3 small ones will still make a clear difference. It will be a few hour cosy rumbling moment around rest time, but afterwards its just calm and you feel amazing and gain your freedom. Psilocybin is different dudes, its the only "treatment" I would recommend to someone who genuinely wants to get better. There is no addiction, withdrawal, or negative side effects. It's just pure healing., far more effective than any anti-depressant. You can thank me later,

[@JesseJason-qc7ug]

I was horrifically depressed since childhood. It was relentless. I assumed it would ultimately end me somehow. About twelve years ago I randomly accepted the offer from a friend of a few doses of mushrooms. I did them two consecutive nights alone. First night was pretty mild. The second night? Wow. I saw my depression from every angle, realized much. Next day: depression totally gone. Never came back, never coming back. It's like it's a forest far away I can remember, and could probably find again with enough effort, but it has zero impact on anything in my life or mind. They honestly saved my life and improved it immensely. I never did them again, either. I wish there was a good, organized way to administer them to people who would benefit from them.

[@MatthewBritnell]

I feel your pain. Been going through it for 20 years. Trust me it can get alot worse!

[@henryblatchford5611]

Your not alone brother your Definitely being heard. mine was 100 proof tavarski for 14 years I'd last a month to 4 months then relapse so i'm back Trying to get sober again its like my 7th day. Withdrawals are a pain in the ass.But It will get better!

[@Robdawgx]

Andy Ramage (look him up for some quitting motivation) mentioned something like quitting is generally like an upside down corkscrew, it takes a few times going around before you're out. So basically what you're doing now is normal, take solace in that. Also, the fact that you're questioning your lifestyle means you're actually on the right path. So you're in the process, just gotta keep going until you're free :) I'm the same age and dealt with the same stuff as you. I'm on 2 months without alcohol - feeling much better about myself, working out daily, and appreciating things in life that previously I just overlooked. It's a natural high man I'm telling you. You've got this brother.

[@LotusCordova]

I can relate to these feelings. I quit drinking about 8 years ago after getting black out drunk, nightly, for an extended period of time. May I offer what helped ME and maybe/hopefully this will be words of help to you or someone that reads this. I quit and luckily, I never relapsed. I didn’t hold these “goals” over myself. That’s a huge weight and amount of pressure, and ultimately so many people turn BACK to the bottle because those personal pressures are just to much. This is definitely a physical, but MOST of this quitting process is mental. What helped me is I didn’t set these “achievement goals”. I had simple focus of 1) I am in charge of my life and not alcohol. I wanted to prove I could. 2) I kept my family in mind. My daughter asked if “it made me feel better”. The answer was obviously, “NO, it makes me feel worse”. When I didn’t have a good answer for her…THAT is the key that changed my mindset. You are bigger than this. Don’t put these huge pressures of different goals, in my opinion. Find the SIMPLE truths of WHY to quit and it’s mind over matter. I’m a super high anxiety/battle depressive states often. But I know it’s MENTAL and isn’t “real” unless I make it real. If I can do it, anyone can kick it. Find 3 simple reasons WHY you want to….and run with it.

[@chrisbfreelance]

Get yourself to an AA meeting ASAP, you don't need to instantly get a sponsor or do the steps, but just listen and tell your story. There is no rhyme nor reason why it works, but identifying with a fellow sick and suffering alcoholic, or decade long sober alcoholics does wonders. It's free and only costs your time, your current trajectory will cost you more than money ever could.

[@bristlefist]

In AA the solution to alcoholism IS the steps. Why would you loiter in misery, doing damage to your family(the worst part) and yourself if it was unnecessary. Some may find just going to meetings enough. I would venture this bloke may be beyond that. If just going to meetings was enough AA would have an impeccable success rate. Unfortunately, so many share the message you are sharing and for most it leads to relapse and a misunderstanding of the very first step in AA

[@kennethleitch8709]

My father was an Alcoholic and I watched him struggle for years to stop. I vowed never to drink, I am scared I would be the same.

[@BDogs10]

there’s nothing wrong with a drink or 3. You gotta be a bit mature (& obviously) not have a problem with the drink

[@kennethleitch8709]

@@BDogs10 If only that worked, they'd be no alcoholics.

[@BDogs10]

totally🙏 . My Dad was an alcoholic too. he couldn’t stop at (1) & I couldn’t for a longtime either. I discovered later in life majority of ppl chill back on a few & are ok

[@jbennison5672]

Of course it works. Depends on the individual.​@@kennethleitch8709

[@patrickcate1070]

My heart goes out to you man. Your story reminds me so much of my own. The fact of the matter is that alcoholism isn't a self-improvement problem - it's a disease, and there is no amount of self-will or drive or reminding yourself of your convictions, etc., that can end it, because addiction has access to those very same parts of yourself, and hijacks them. It wasn't until I really surrendered that it got better, and surrender meant not just admitting I was an alcoholic, but asking for help. I had to ask for help from other people, especially other people who were in recovery.

[@tjfSIM]

Man I know this feeling so well. First of all don't beat yourself up - it's hard, it's really hard. But you're not back at day 1, you've just hit another bend in the road but as long as you stay on that road, keep getting back on it and don't give up, it will straighten out. Even if you trip up, every day sober still counts, because that's another day when you didn't punish your body, and you didn't wake up full of anxiety and regret. If you do slip up it's not back to square one, it's just reminding you why you're doing this, and why it's so important to stick with it.

[@peacelilly739]

AA has helped me to stay abstinent from alcohol, and, emotionally sober, for 7 years now..... one day at a time. I tried lots of other ways. It might be worth a try. I understand your pain. maybe give it a go. You don't have to do this alone. 🙏

[@robertriebel8064]

Going to Thailand and thinking your not going to drink... Come on Man 😂

[@airaozolina7555]

Never give up! Be sober for just today and keep going! I am with you man! You are doing better than you think!

[@airaozolina7555]

Love and light!

[@Catlady12341]

Idk who you are but you popped up on my feed…. I am you…had a year and fell off. Starting over ….lets do this! I subscribed and will watch some of your older videos. Good luck! Thanks for the honestly!

[@siegfriedschmitz5260]

I know about this bro, keep it up. When i relapsed i always stopped going to the gym, stopped eathing healthy. The full programm. I live in thailand since 8 years (even in pattaya), managed to get sober here (3 years ago). Going to the gym, counting my calories, got in great shape, waking up in early morning for a walk at the beach, got a cat. I am 40 and my life is better than ever. I am so happy that i dont drink anymore, keep it up, you can do it also.

[@Veromoi4]

You are not alone!!! Please just know I know exactly what you’re feeling. Never stop trying to get better 🙏 start over. When you’re sober long enough, miracles within yourself will happen.

[@Joa_jo]

Im not here to tell you to join AA. To each his own. BUT, if you can, just read the AA book. This cycle, the obsession of the mind, this desease, this -im gonna do this and this - just to fail further down….that is what the book is about. Its crazy. That book will change the way you see this sickness. Your’re not struggeling because you dont have willpower or is weak or you dont want it bad enough or you have done this or that. This is an addiction. Read the book. Just the intro if nothing else

[@JJ-eb8eu]

It is not a disease. Thats AA talking.

[@travisa20]

You’ve got a lot of people judging you in the comments but I just want to say that I appreciate you putting your journey out there. Almost everyone who quits a serious drinking problem goes through years of relapses. That’s why people call it a journey

[@thebaldyorkshireman9019]

Hey man! Everything that you have said in this video I can relate to. You are literally telling my story. I'm 8 years sober and still loving the sober life, but before I got sober I relapsed for a year after been sober for 3 years. I needed to relapse in order to understand that I simply do not have the ability to drink moderately, just like you! When you stop you will 100% feel anxious, overwhelmed, and emotional, but give it a few months and you will start to gain clarity and feel less anxious. For me, it was anxiety that kept me drinking as I just couldn't stand it and when I did drink it got worse, so I would drink more and more. I have so much that I could share with you that I belive would be helpful.

[@jeffdahlman8581]

You are RAD, buddy - keep on track - I had to go into a rehab. 3 times before it stuck for more than a few months - I am at 563 days - year and a half - there are still days that sneak in where I think ...MAYBE...just maybe I can have a beer at the BBQ - but I have to relive and replay those tapes of how shitty I felt mentally and physically. .and how I will actually die if I do !! .It WILL happen man - it will !!! surround yourself with others who know -- much love to you brother !! keep talking about it !!

[@ashkatleorock-jf8tl]

Do not listen to these a$$ h0/3 trolls who criticize your efforts. I want to see their video progress up here! Talk is cheap behind a screen… I say to them, “put up or shut up! “. All of this is a part of you journey. I posted in your first video, to check out This Naked Mind. You are so far ahead in your journey then you realize! I have no skin in the game. Don’t know the author or anything like that. But it really changed my outlook on my progress! I really think it will help you in your outlook! Again, I think it’s admirable you put yourself out there. It is helping someone! Keep it up!👍

[@markg.4246]

"I have no skin in the game". Translation, "I don't know what I'm talking about, because I have no actual experience". Only opinions.

[@leetarrant5630]

This naked mind Annie Grace

[@Mal3xander]

You are not your present or your future, just now so don't blame yourself for neather, just do batter for today. Believe in you dude! You got this!

[@laotouthinking9090]

Go and find an AA meeting and be around likeminded people improving themselves

[@giatasha2181]

When I am feeling challenged in my sobriety I also watch LD channel and watch other people struggling with alcoholic cirrhosis and that snaps me out of it. I don’t want to die like that. Six months this week. Your life is worth living

[@HaydenPettit-dx8dv]

It’s a tough battle mate. I’ve had relapse after relapse all through my 20’s, in and out of detox wards, I’ve done a night in a mental hospital from alcohol related psychosis. I’m 30 now and got through most of March, April without a drop then had a one day binge in mid May. Thank God it was only the one day and I’ve been back on the wagon since. I started the gym and started an HGV course during my time sober and everything seemed smooth, I thought I had my life back, but it was short lived. I lost all motivation to continue the course and hit the gym and I’ve been lying in a dark room ever since (although sober). Depression is very real but alcohol will never help. My mum said to me from a young age that no matter how impossible life may seem at times, alcohol will always be something else to tackle on top of what’s going on. I hope you’re doing well.

[@phillipwhite4741]

It’s a process and it takes time, as long as you never give up you’ll get there. One day at a time ,Stay strong mate

[@pauldoyle9334]

I feel for u. Common you will get a handle on this shit. YOU CAN !

[@pic101]

This was a really great video. I watch a lot of BS on YT and for once, this was as real as it gets. Bravo. You seem like a top bloke. We all have out stuff, you have a much better chance of getting on top of it by fessing up like this.

[@joko09010]

You will NEVER regret NOT drinking. But you know the regrets that inevitable come with it. Sobriety has to come first, before the kids, the wife, the job, etc. everything flows from that foundation. Good luck. You are not alone.

[@Sweptundertherug]

Hope your doing ok man. I haven't seen another vid so hope all is good. Im 50 in 3 months and have been battling with alcohol for 6 years, its a tough one🙏

[@AshlingMcgovern-ir9bu]

Im 40 I was same as you from 22 to 35. It took me relapse time and time again and again. It takes time and rock bottom and as long as u want to stop keep trying cos one day u will say f enuf is enuf now im 5 yrs sober trust me i drank everyday for over 15 years while working while being a mother it caught up but you got this u are self aware u are strong and u still have your health your looks so it will be ok

[@stx8986]

Just the truth, have the same thoughts, sober for 71 day, every day is fight with myself, but every day you getting better at it, keep on keeping on

[@CMoore8539]

♥️New Subscriber!!♥️ I am right here in your comments listening to you while I am going through the exact same thing. I have been alcohol free for 5 short days now and I am really going through it too but I shall Not pick it up Again!! Not Today! I almost died literally! I’ve been in the hospital for emergency surgery two days ago and I was released the morning after the surgery and sent home alone!! I’m still extremely sick hurt depressed mixed up mentally and in agony. I had to have emergency gallbladder surgery and the surgeon had to clear out the bile ducts too! I’m extremely hurt. They sent me home with nothing for pain except Tylenol!! It’s insane and inhumane how the medical society in the USA is so afraid of prescribing pain medication now!! Thank Goodness I’m Not even trying to drink this pain away this morning! Please reach out for some help. Talk to someone who understands what you are battling right now. Whatever you do Just Don’t Give Up ⬆️!!! You Will Overcome This!!!♥️🙏💯

[@profalbers9408]

First, never quit "quitting". My 1st promise to myself was I was always gonna quit one more time than I got off track. 2cnd, (and this helped me a ton. If you try it, I think it'll help you too). Don't focus on "quitting" anything. Psychologically, that seems hard. Focus instead on moving towards other things, and how much you want them. That starts by changing the questions you ask yourself. Instead of "are there other people drinking more than me?". Instead ask, "am I radically and passionately working towards achieving optimal health?". (and this includes physical health, mental & emotional health, financial and career health, and relational health with the good, genuine, caring people still in your life, and not yet in your life). "Do you want to sleep much better, have way more energy, and less stress? Once you here that "yes" in your head, you know what to do. Make a plan to get there, and bring as many good people alongide you as you can. Keep a journal of how much better you feel, and all the good things that happen to you. Best of luck to you, and keep us all updated.

[@xy4859]

Here's what I do instead of beating myself up. Never drink in my area/country except exceptionally if invited to a real celebration (like end of basketball season get together) but I don't ever get wasted. When I travel abroad like on surf trips, beer allowed and then I quit within a couple of days until next trip or meaningful celebration. This works because I don't let alcohol in my everyday setting so my brain doesn't expect it there. Also lots of sports and strong mind. This is an illustration of how the 80/20 rule can work, but I know this might not work if you are really addicted.

[@AtlasAtPeace]

Hey man, I appreciate the video. Remember, the discomfort you are forcing yourself through right now, is gonna keep the 38 days from turning into 90 days, 6 months, etc. You are already on the right track under your own willpower. Take that as a win in itself. Get some sleep, brother.

[@philipbaptista8576]

Over a decade of trying,can't count how many relapses,11 months in going strong . constantly remind myself of the past,not going back,you can do it mate!!

[@susannemaynard6380]

I am reading and following the book "How to Eat to Change How you Drink" and noticing that it is greatly reducing the desire to drink alcohol. Wishing you self compassion and Grace. You are awesome!

[@opencurtin]

A lot of people fail many times to quit alcohol on the first attempt just keep trying and eventually you will crack it stay strong young man . Im 53 and it took me 30 years to quit not that I wanted to stop until I hit 48 pushing 50 and I knew my binge drinking would end badly so one day I woke up after an awful night of drinking in a terrible state and said thats it I am quitting it was like an epiphany, one thing is I never let my guard down because I know it takes just one drink to put me down in the gutter of the booze shit show.

[@GMCvideos2012]

Going on vacation always stresses me out and make me want to use.

[@1gavin629]

Man, this sounds just like what I was feeling and saying to myself. Alcohol is a beast, it is a symptom of some mental game which takes time to understand and heal. I'm 25 years old, been sober for 250+ days from alcohol. Took me many years of drinking almost everyday with my longest streak being 17 days until now. Hang in there, it gets easier but when those urges to drink come up, it's a symptom of something deeper. I wish I could drink my problems away some days, but I know it would lead me right back to where I was...trapped. I liken sobriety to passing through an invisible wall in a video game, it took so many day ones but randomly, one day that turned into the streak I have now. Admitting I was powerless and truly seeing it was a huge step. AA helped probably the most and most of the times I just sat in and listened. I haven't done the steps, I will in time but don't put too much pressure on yourself. You don't have to do 1000 things in this specific order to get sober. Just gotta see the progress of sobriety and finally see and say "Hey, I have a chance to keep this going. Why would I want to go back to that life?" The days are not always easy, but it sure is better than where they were at in active drinking. Stay strong. You can cross that invisible wall too, just need to get help from AA or someone other than yourself. Will power alone is not enough to beat this beast in my experience, only to allow the sobriety to glide.

[@carmenl163]

The recognition that something deeper is going on makes you wise beyond your years. I've learned that it's all about finding peace inside yourself. I wish you all the best.

[@sobrietyproject]

I have been an alcoholic for years as well as a poly addict. When you relapse, you really beat yourself up. Believe me, my last binge lasted for days after 10 days sober. I got on an alcohol program which includes counseling and medication. It’s still an arduous journey even with professional help. Making videos is great, and it helps keep you accountable as I also put my addiction problem out there to the world. However, a social media platform alone is not going to get you sober. Going to meetings and finding outside support is crucial!

[@redtiger6047]

Please keep it up my friend, you're stories help me. Thank you.

[@Koop85]

Good luck on your journey you can do it. My advice is to not overthink it. Focus on all of the benefits of not drinking. Sometimes when youre craving a drink, youre literally just thirsty for water. Takes awhile to form new habits as you know but im hoping you stay positive and dont beat yourself up. Keep on fighting. Thanks for sharing your journey, you can do it bro just commit and let it go

[@georgiastewart4479]

Give yourself credit, this is not easy!. The positive part of this is that you realize you have a problem, and care enough to try again. You have a good attitude about changing, and doing better. This too shall pass. Keep up the good work

[@Rick40years]

That was a helpful video. Thanks for sharing.

[@fishingallure3672]

Switch to beer and only beer when you relapse. I did it 15 years ago and never looked back. I still catch a buzz but it's not blackout like I would do on liquor. It's not a solution but it will help you cut back slowly if you want too. It also does less damage

[@redsoxxfn]

Some of us have an allergy to alcohol. We react abnormally when we consume it. Meaning, drinking socially or in moderation simply doesn't work. It may for a day or two, but it's simply not sustainable. One day at a time seems to be a much simpler way to sustain sobriety. For me, I always looked at alcohol as the problem, but what I now realize is that it had become my solution to all of my problems. Not saying AA is the only way to recover, because there are many pathways to recovery, but it has given me new freedom and a new happiness to the point that I no longer have the desire to drink or drug. I simply try to concentrate on doing the next right thing, and remember that so long as I dont drink today, I have a fighting chance at living the life I and my family deserve. I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability and am wishing you strength and peace on your recovery journey!

[@love-xh1zg]

Thanks for sharing...its a good thing when you realize u are not capable of moderate drinking...so u know if u want to be free of alcohol frustration u cant pick up that first one... U r on the journey...u'll get there!!!Wish u ali the best!!!

[@Alexanderc89]

You got this man, let me know if you need someone to talk I’m about to be at a year off alcohol next month without AA meetings after many failed attempts trying different ways. It’s gets better if you accept the fact that life will be better without it ever again

[@hayeshove1723]

you look like riff raff bro haha best of luck to you man i was sober a year and tricked myself into thinking i could drink in moderation, drank worse than i ever have for 2 years after that, now im over three years sober and my life ahs been completely been transformed wife kids good job nice place etc.u can do it man.

[@Manos-de-Piedra]

?

[@scottlumbatis101]

Thank you for your candor! Great Message. I can relate to everything you talked about!

[@josephhealy]

I love your videos man and I feel your pain. I'm so early in my journey but I've already had a 100 day ones. It's so hard to grasp that point when you know you've had enough. I completely reflect myself in what you say. It's so sad it isn't easier for guys like us 😕

[@Leahmoonbeamflower]

I have too much soul to drink spirits. Yet somehow, I still decide to consume that poison. Why? Why I ask myself? Why do I decide to let the devil’s pee touch my beautiful lips time and time again? I’m currently a week free from the grog and the brain fog has lifted..and I want to stay this way. I WANT to stay this way. I want to feel good. Skin clear. Eyes seeing exactly what’s in front of me. Life seems and feels wonderful. This is just a week of being alcohol free. I want to stay this way. What keeps me going back? Of course it’s boredom and trauma and wanting to loose control and wanting to “ have fun”… and etc…. I’m so over wanting to numb my life. I can’t have just one or just two or just 3 drinks. The truth is, I’ll drink until I pass out. F alcohol. It has done nothing for me except make me feel terrible for days after. I will deal with my trauma I will put it somewhere positive. I will turn my pain into power. I will deal with boredom without alcohol. The most beautiful flowers sprout from bullshite and it’s time to grow.

[@sullykhan7237]

Absolutely beautifully said honest to God

[@Leahmoonbeamflower]

@@sullykhan7237 ☺️💕😊

[@OutofPocket005]

Love this. Its All facts I'm with you.

[@Leahmoonbeamflower]

@@sullykhan7237 thank you. I hope your day is going good.

[@Leahmoonbeamflower]

@@OutofPocket005 ☺️☺️☺️

[@aarongonzalez1581]

Im 8 years sober never thought it would be possible. I had to put pride aside and went to AA. I cut people out of my life for a while to work on myself. There is no moderation for addiction. Is stop point blank. Do it for you and no one else one day at a time. Keep your mind busy. If you need out patient treatment then seek it. You can do this. Withdrawals suck but the end result is worth it

[@beirdoh2053]

I'm right there with you bro. Been fighting this battle for a long time now.

[@jackaustin5629]

Hey bro, thanks for sharing, I’m sorry you’ve gone through this. I don’t want to preach or to tell you how to go about this. But I’ve been 18 months sober now, and I take a different approach to AA. It is something that has worked for me personally extremely well although it is very different from the AA approach. You clearly on some level see there is some benefit to alcohol, which means on some level, there is always a battle of willpower there, a temptation which is a constant source of pain. You’re not drinking because you know you can’t - rather than because you don’t want to. I have used I guess what is best described as the ‘Alan Carr’ approach to my drinking problem, which was quite severe (daily drinker, hugely deceitful, behaviorally addicted). I have actively unpicked and alcohol and its place in its society to the point where I see it as a pernicious poison, and I actively have learned to hate alcohol. It’s a long and difficult process and it takes a great deal of ‘paradigm shifting’ - but I truly see alcohol as a disgusting and evil substance now, which has helped me immensely. I know this is a huge departure from the AA model, and therefore isn’t for everyone, just as AA wasn’t for me. Just to be clear, as a massive disclaimer, I am not dissing AA as I know it has literally saved many people’s lives, however there is multiple ways to approach this problem in my opinion, and my sobriety has been really steady with very little craving (if any) any more, and I feel very confident I will never drink again (however you can only take one day at a time - that is something I hugely agree with the AA model on) anyway good luck to you and anyone on the journey and I wish you well x

[@raidermt81]

Find a sober community that you can lean on. We can't do it by ourselves. For me that was AA, but there are plenty of other resources. Attending meetings, listening to experiences, wisdom of others, and working the program is the structure/support i need to make this a lifelong process. We need to relearn how to live sober and AA does that for me. Best of luck. Praying for you.

[@Honora-fx5fn]

Your honesty is far reaching, thank u ❤

[@stanleycostello9610]

Recovering alcoholic (19 years sober). There are some people that say AA is bs. Not for me. Drunks talking to drunks. Every member of AA knows what you're going through. They also say that the "Higher Power" is also bs. To them I say, the Higher Power is within you. Take it or leave it as you see fit. Best of luck to you.

[@Babyboffa2018]

If moderation were possibly you wouldn't have an alcohol problem. You can NEVER drink again: not now, not next week, not next year, not in 10,20,30,40 years. Never means never, no excuses. Once you've accepted that you'll be on the road to success.

[@wrongthink1212]

Don't be so hard on yourself mate. You look like you are in half decent shape. I'm posting this after 1 bottle of wine and a few beers.... :( but the buzz is addictive honestly. Until I got to 35ish I never had close to a 'problem' with Alchohol, but last 5 years of my life (since working a proper full time 'cushy' office job TBH ) it's been a thing I'm struggling with just to bring some relaxation and escape from the BS. Alot of it's because our type don't really get bad hangovers and alchohol is very enjoyable ... I don't know what the answer is, honestly. In an ideal world maybe just tea but the days / weeks are long .... I don't know.

[@paulosousa5870]

You are not alone! Im also wanna quit weed and im struggling a lot, always relapse... Its so hard when we let ourselfs be contolled by addiction, she finds always a way to enter back to our lifes. That sucks... Stay strong, you already manage to achieves a lot, and your videos show that, so you can be back to sober again.

[@siriush100]

Sober implies between uses. You can become recovered immediately. No such thing as in recovery. You either recover or you don't. No counting days (until your next use). I was badly addicted to Kratom extracts. Not many people even know what they are but they are similar to opiates and they get you high. They are also outrageously expensive. I was spending about $1,000 monthly on them. It makes me so sick when I think about it. Totally out of control drug addict here. I was convinced that I was sick. That I had a disease. That I just couldn't control myself. Then I discovered rational recovery and avrt and Jack trimpey about 3 weeks ago, and it saved my life. I hope to spread the word and help other people save themselves also.

[@eastwoofer]

My advice is to also quite caffeine. It will give you the true peace of mind and calmness you need. Get a good tasting decaf and start you're true day number one. You'll get great sleep and in no time meet your younger self. How good you'll soon feel will shock you. No caffeine in your life is true sobriety.

[@JokuRandomiPoju]

Forcing soberness with willpower is near impossible. You are right, you should start to seek answers for within yourself. Maybe AA might help, therapist, my way was to deepen my spiritual connection with breathwork, meditation and starting to live in the present. Everyone has their own path, the hard thing is to find your own. Important thing to remember is, there is nothing wrong with you. Stop punishing yourself. You’ll have to really figure out, what makes you wanna drink and the answer to that can be found within. Everything will work out in the end, the universe will help and guide you, if you became sensitive enough for its message. Hope you are doing better, blessings ❤

[@luke4444]

Totally relate to isolation, depression. It only gets worse. Never gets better if you continue. Rock bottoms gets worse until going to the gym, eating healthy are off the agenda all together. Alcohol is baffling, powerful enemy that ultimately wants you dead. Once all that truly sinks in and you surrender to its power over you... Stay away from the first drink.. Today, tomorrow

[@Mark-eg2yd]

I hope I am wrong but you don't seem ready to stop yet. You're doing well to quit for some periods of time so you should be proud of that. I thought I was a lost cause and that I'd die a drunk having "fun" but I too reached THE DAY. Unfortunately it took an attempted suicide from horrible withdrawal symptoms. DT's, hearing voices etc.. IMO you need medical help. You seem to have a very extreme personality. It is crazy going to the gym, eating healthily when detoxing. That's quite frankly unimportant for the time being and just making a go at sobriety is effort enough. This is almost a couple of months old so I hope you're still going strong. Good luck

[@logannixon231]

I agree with u I hope he stays strong but your right u have to make that decision same for me took me going to hospital basically having a seizure cause of withdrawal to quit it takes rock bottom sometimes unfortunately

[@yodings]

day 3 here. More confident than ever. Im not capable of moderation either, hence why im back on day 3 lol. Hope u cracked it this time brooo

[@paulmack5778]

You sound exactly like me when i rant to my girlfriend about my addiction issues. I was like this for years and years in and out of sobriety. The only thing that slowed me down was a health issue that arose from drinking. Keep trying dont give up

[@keithpilkington907]

Thanks for sharing bro i no how hard it is relapse is inevitable we learn by our mistakes my freind good luck 👍

[@1pelicanmarsh]

I feel for you. However idk what youre going thru....but I have seen your struggle and pain both in this video and others. I do see you giving your all to figure a path to change things. It seems as if what you're up against is not just a habit or pattern of behavior, but it's something chemical youre fighting. A couple great things on your side (imo) is your discipline with diet and working out and most importantly your kids. You also seem to genuinely like working out (again not me) but I would think that could be a useful diversion and source for working out the angst. When the time is right you may need to enlist some pro help to change patterns, as youre up against something bigger than most humans can handle alone. Wishing you the best and try to be less hard on yourself until you find a more successful path. Best G

[@adamlekki9592]

Don't beat yourself up too bad just quit again and you'll feel much better! I've gone back and forth at least 10 times.. don't give up brother 👍. It can go swell again.. just do it again.

[@mandywaddington3814]

We’ve ALL had these conversations with ourselves, again and again and again! What are you doing differently? What work are you doing to keep you sober? Clinging on for dear life won’t keep you sober, you are trying to convince yourself, addiction is beyond anything rationale, it is beyond your control.

[@markg.4246]

Absolutely Mandy. Unfortunately, people don't want to hear the truth. I was one of them. Until...the day I could no longer live with the guy in the mirror. I had a moment of rigorous honesty where I realized that alcohol was not the root problem. It was ME! That was the moment my recovery began! No more bullshit, no excuses, no self talk, no NOTHING...except ACTION! I literally had to change how I was moving my feet. I took action that I did NOT believe in, and got results I couldn't explain. That was more than 30 years ago, and to this day, I take the same ACTION. Not because I'm worried about drinking, but because I want to continue to experience the unbelievably great life that was freely given to me by the Fellowship! And because I have a desire to see other people "live to good purpose"! Peace, Mark

[@mandywaddington3814]

@@markg.4246 me too, that’s why I recognise it in him, bargaining and trying to logic it, I wonder how many times he has ‘reset’ promising to never drink again.

[@Aj14x]

If your kids ain't enough to make you stop, nothing will. You will forever be going around in circles until you lose your family and hit rock bottom only then you may stop but probably not as it seems like a vicious circle. Go into rehab and give your kids a chance.

[@hoosierbaddy3052]

When I finally saw how my drinking affected my stepdaughter, I was horrified. I didn’t quit then. But one cannot say that drinking around children is ok. Their little psyches are decimated by the embarrassing drunk behavior of their parents. Whether it’s outright abuse or neglect or being an adult idiot in front of them. It’s baaaad! Get sober if you’re a parent, please.

[@happybdayo]

It happens to us all man it took major surgery to really sober me up... don't wait till that. 🙏 That day you don't get up WILL come unless you just take it 1 day at a time ❤

[@airaozolina7555]

Man you should go to AA meetings, they will help you a lot. I did go for few years and I am really grateful. I relasped few times in the beginning. Living sober now over 5 years. One day at the time. Living in a present moment, not planning for future! Everything will work out! I wish you all the best, never give up! Peace, love and harmony!

[@jadomi2076]

Mate you can never drink alcohol again. Ever. Simple as that.

[@joko09010]

Once we grasp that alcohol is NEVER an option for us, it actually makes it so much easier. Any other way comes with too much work and too many consequences. 💪🏻💙

[@Tidnull]

⁠@@joko09010"at a certain point in the drinking of every alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail" AA p.24 "This is the baffling feature of alcoholism as we know it--this utter inability to leave it alone no matter how great the necessity or the wish." AA p.34 In other words, knowledge that we must stop, or die, is ultimately useless.

[@dennismetzger9287]

Same for me, it's my brutal truth. It took me 3 years of trying to stop to actually stop. Knowing myself I know 1 sip will lead to a bottle

[@SenorPain81]

Having a beer right now. It's so cold. Delicious when it's like that. Cheers

[@petarnikolov3227]

​@SenorPain81 I don't like beer. Alcohol isn't my favorite. I'm not an alcoholic. But I'm a drug addict to stimulants. Wanna roll a Meth pipe, smoke some, and reply here to spite me? 😂

[@Mr.character.shuaib2]

Look I know how addiction is I’m there too, but you need AA badly I think. You keep going in circles which is known as the cycle and that’s an important key factor for AA that helps you with breaking that habit man! You got this it’ll be hell but you got it!

[@beanymanwalks]

Just done exactly tge same mate. 3 days sober now. One day at a time this time.

[@jackedkerouac4414]

I managed to stay sober 51 days since I was 14 years old. That's nuts. I'm 49 now and that 7 week sobriety streak was last year. Ever since then I can go 2, maybe 5 days and it's back to binge drinking. I don't know why I lost my mojo. The only thing I can surmise is that I am not going into it with 100% confidence and dedication. You're not alone brother. Let's not dwell on the supposed failures. That inner dialog is poison. Let's f'kn do this.

[@AnnLaustsen87]

I support you. My vice was Xanax mixed with alcohol.

[@arobersonable]

Me too. Thank you thank you thank you-it's lonely in this place.

[@samathakaiser2247]

My friend is in The same boat as you, i wish you could talk to her. Your gonna do it. Its not easy your not at day one youve been fighting for month's dont think you have failed. Its not day one its still an ongoing fight. Dont fall for the AA NA bull. Your not failing just get back up and move on.

[@Cracktune]

respect and Godspeed.

[@madcow5833]

Welcome back! You can do this!