I Told My Wife To Lose Some Weight

[@trainerjoes]

Hey guys, I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts on this very tricky subject :) Please comment and let's keep this going in the comment section. Join a virtual 21 Day Transformation! trainerjoes.com/

[@niteturtle4942]

As a wife with no children who allowed herself to become morbidly obese this hits hard! Only because I wish my husband would've been honest with me enough to tell me he was concerned for my health and encouraged me to lose weight. It took me becoming a type 2 diabetic with high blood pressure to wake up to reality. I'm down almost 70 lbs and have 50 lbs more to go. My husband is proud of my weight loss as he sees me turning into the lady he fell in love with 10 years ago....because I'm happy again! Amazing video, these videos encourage me to keep pushing on.

[@trainerjoes]

Thanks for sharing your story! Awesome!🙌

[@Melwit]

I am on a weight loss journey; 40lbs down on a 100 lb goal. I have had a lot of reasons to sabotage my weight loss in the past; being single for 15 yrs after an abusive relationship. I have healed and now realize the best thing I can give to a future husband is a healthy body ( a Godly life a given). He may choose to love me even if I wasn't healthy but why wouldn't I want to be healthy for my husband and why wouldn't my husband want to be healthy for me; We are accountable to each other. In my singleness, I am accountable to God first and also the husband God promised me.

[@gcs1432]

A husband or a wife should care enough to tell their spouse that they are concerned about their health/weight condition. A spouse has a duty to care for their temple. I'm guilty of letting myself go. Fast forward 22 years later I still carry the excess weight from my 3 pregnancies plus more. My husband never told me I was overweight he just dropped hints. I didn't appreciate his hints. He went about it in the most insensitive way. However, at the end of the day I looked at myself in the mirror and saw what he saw and I didn't give my 💯 . I should've never gained all that weight but I did. I should've loved myself more and taken responsibility but I didn't. A spouse can be in love with you and still not find you attractive. It doesn't make them a bad person it's just a fact.

[@trainerjoes]

Thanks for that response 🙌

[@happyluv]

It's like walking a minefield pointing out faults to anyone ...even if they do it in the most sensitive, loving way. Telling a woman she needs to lose weight is a bit like telling a man he needs to step up and make enough money to support his family so she can stay home with the babies. Its emasculating to the male ego, especially if he's already working 10 hours a day. Same thing for a man to tell his wife she needs to lose weight, its devaluing her worth . Even if he does it the most kind and respectful way...she's not stupid. Society has been telling her since she played with Barbie dolls what she should look like. Yes, we should all be mature enough to handle the truth, but it hurts and sometimes women/men don't forget how the words made them feel. If you really love the person...wait until they come to you and express their frustration or need for help to lose weight. Then its on you to step up and support her/him.

[@trainerjoes]

@@happyluv thanks for watching and sharing.

[@larevival4074]

American women are so triggered about their weight, you are a bold man to have brought it up. We need to love our spouses enough to speak the truth in love. Thanks for your great example Trainer Joe ❤️

[@briangreen2672]

Congratulations on all the new subscribers. I’ve been watching it weekly. The number keeps going up. I’m so glad others are discovering this life-changing truth.

[@trainerjoes]

Thanks Brian! Yes, we are growing nicely! 🙌

[@marijoalvis1980]

When my husband and I were married for about three years he told me I wasn't good enough because I was too fat for him. About three years after that I had lost almost 80 pounds, and he decided that I was too fat and he bought TWO packages of double stuffed Oreos because he would notice men looking at me. It took me over ten years, but I ended up gaining most of that weight back. We have been married over 22 years now and I still frequently feel that I'm not enough. When I bring anything up he tells me that he loves me and that's that, but he doesn't want to take me out. He doesn't like dating. He's still all about work. It's still a struggle. 😑

[@trainerjoes]

Wow. Sorry you have been going through this. There is a lot going on here. Praying for you!

[@Heidi_Cheri]

When I said “I do” to my husband, I took on the responsibility of keeping him satisfied sexually and that means presenting my body in decent (not necessarily perfect) condition to him. I expect him to do the same. 😉 Taking care of our bodies is one of the ways my husband and I show love to each other.

[@trainerjoes]

Thanks for watching and sharing!

[@happyluv]

Oh my word....I'm not sure the man should say anything about weight gain. Women's hormones/stress drive us to put our self care on the back burner. I don't think there is a woman alive that isn't aware of her extra pounds and feels ashamed of it. Our culture has made sure that women feel insecure at every stage of their lives for having a few extra pounds never mind being obese. We obsess over it constantly, so to think we need our partners to point it out to us is ridiculous. We need their support to lose the weight. How about the man does the shopping and meal prep? Help a girl out, take some of the pressure off...especially if they are both working outside of the home, but I don't see that happening. Talk is cheap guys...and you can't equate smoking with overeating. You can live without smoking, but you have to eat. I'm 67 years old and have been bombarded my whole life with weight loss strategies...fat is making you fat...sugar is evil....carbs are the devil...vegan is the way we were meant to eat...no, carnivore...is the best human diet. We are all victims of an insane culture that has lost its way, due in large part to advertising by the sugar/ food industry. Common sense went out the window in the 50's and we've been on a downward spiral culminating in a world where you have to tell people to eat healthy food and then explain to them what healthy food is!!! By the way...I'm enjoying Trainer Joe's pep talks and attempting his "lose 20 lbs" strategy, so no hate going your way Joe! 😊

[@trainerjoes]

There is a lot we agree on:)

[@emilyblack8982]

tough question. If she wants to lose weight then support her to lose it but weight gain is a slippery slope for many. Women lose their shape! Also the 135 lb young female - her start weight in this conversation is probably 30lbs heavier modern day

[@julenebotes18]

People can be very easily feel rejected.... timing is everything. Don't say during a fight!!!😂😂

[@trainerjoes]

@@julenebotes18 🙌🏆

[@samanthawillis2385]

Joe this was great. My husband eats a fourth meal every night, trying to get me to eat with him. You Should touch up on the opposite, A spouse trying to lose weight and be health why the other spouse is wanting her or him to eat. Telling them they are fine the way they are. Can't win for losing

[@trainerjoes]

Yep! That happens too!

[@kimharrison8816]

How about "lets do this together" approach even if the other spouse doesn't need to loose any weight at all.

[@trainerjoes]

Yeah, that can help:)

[@harleenquinzel5814]

That’s the most empathetic way to approach it. You can always tell how someone really feels about their spouse by the way the approach a sensitive topic. Some will use it as an excuse to be nasty under the guise of “being honest”.

[@trainerjoes]

@@harleenquinzel5814 you have a point🙌

[@kims1941]

My adult son who lives with me has put on about 14 pounds in the last year from eating junk at work. He now has 'love handles' protruding from his shirts and I told him it looks unattractive. He says, "You're just used to me looking skinny".

[@trainerjoes]

🤷‍♂️

[@happyluv]

Bottom line, you guys are crazy to bring this up, especially if you aren't perfect ( and none of you are) because guaranteed your partner will clearly get the message that you think less of her. She will get defensive and point out a few of your faults so be prepared to face reality! Its a hornets nest you might regret tangling with. Love each other and be patient, she will confess her frustration when she's ready and then you can offer to help meal prep, grocery shop, walk, bike whatever to help support her weight loss journey. She already knows she's fat, she doesn't need you to educate her.

[@trainerjoes]

Thanks for watching and sharing.

[@wendywertz8828]

I totally disagree I wish my husband had said something to me about my 60 pounds weight gain instead of staying silent for 3 decades and I am taking it all off now ! He was afraid to say anything ! Men speak up !

[@trainerjoes]

@@wendywertz8828 🤯

[@happyluv]

@@wendywertz8828 Why was he afraid? Probably because he could sense you were in a vulnerable place. You never needed him to tell you were 60 lbs overweight, so don't blame him. Trainer Joe is all about owning up, telling it straight...it is not your husband's fault. Its not fair to put that on him.

[@trinabredin5714]

I would

[@duanekuhns5673]

Hey guys, interesting video! The dilemma, I think is the age old "truth & love" balance. Both are of vast importance. Our current culture claims to value the individual above all else, including truth & reality, which is leading us to some interesting chaos. Thanks for stimulating our thoughts, & for a very balanced presentation. Ephesians 4:15 comes to mind.........

[@trainerjoes]

🙌

[@trinabredin5714]

Ask 'are you happy?'

[@trinabredin5714]

I