If Google Was a Guy (Quarantine Edition Full Series)

Every episode from the quarantine version of If Google Was a Guy, animated so that we could produce the series safely and without putting anyone at risk. Be well and stay safe!
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Text with Sam: [phone]

[@dropout]

text us [phone]

[@karljohan9104]

Oh wow I am the first reply on a college humor comment :)

[@vcreativeart16]

Oh hello

[@yinyang1217]

why should we text you

[@Alx8282]

Why?

[@303elliott]

Phone number to the secret account is broken, it says to click the link above, but there's no link

[@natural1sonly827]

"this one says 2021" 'I can do longer if you want" Aged perfectly

[@silverboom0jf764]

To perfectly if you ask me.

[@kevingurr235]

Hello from september 2021 in Australia lockdown

[@lunarjellyfish5538]

@@kevingurr235 It was September two weeks ago? Is that just an Australia thing?

[@MorgaineRiddlePrince]

Soo...

[@Herobrineig]

😬

[@jaelyyymar8071]

Well. The little girl being more aware than the adults definitely feels real.

[@charlie523]

"horny" "great news i'm the internet" best quote of the pandemic

[@manithemaniqwin9196]

I felt that

[@thegraysun5162]

They cencored that 😥😥

[@charlie523]

@@thegraysun5162 fr?

[@thegraysun5162]

@@charlie523 yeah, i guess youtube caught them 🤣🤣

[@charlie523]

@@thegraysun5162 dang it 🤣

[@jjscott6405]

Love how they incorporated the overly simple art style google is using into their animation, Very cool.

[@grabble7605]

What's overly simple about it?

[@andrewduong2740]

It's Allegria

[@Iamnottheplatypus]

Corporate art style

[@BeanieBoi69]

google screaming "stay home!" while kicking a chair is what keeps me going in life

[@mosquitonstuff]

Same

[@MaterwelonMan]

Agreed

[@alex.g7317]

@@MaterwelonMan Disagreed

[@bdaarmy9736]

@@alex.g7317 Disagreed

[@AutoFirePad]

Terrifying. In the other videos mr. google simply gave all the info he had. Now he commands and filters info... as in real life!! :D

[@subzeroelectronics3022]

Remember how shocked people were when we said, “quarantine could even last until 2021” and now it’s just like, “yeah sure, I can deal with five more years”

[@Frostfern94]

Literally! At the start I was like "2 months?! I can't do that! It'll be done in a few more weeks surely!" and now I'm like "Eh, what's another year or two? Screw it! Spend the rest of my life indoors, that'll be fine!!"

[@Kami-mq8sl]

Good news past you!!!! Covid restrictions are lifting, mask mandates are lowering and everything is getting back to the way it was slowly but surely!! - person from 28 February 2022

[@bthsr7113]

@@Frostfern94 I was calling 2023 pessimistically in early pandemic. I hate that I was right!

[@My-nl6sg]

so it was YOU who doomed us all

[@kimmiewise1044]

@@bthsr7113 But you weren’t? By early 2022 all restrictions have been lifted, no mask mandates not even vaccine mandates no one is even caring about disease anymore, it’s all about the economy and inflation due to excess government spending (due to overzealous shut downs of small businesses and artificial supply chain issues caused by mandates in the first place). I haven’t heard a single person talk about the pandemic since like February in 2022. It’s over dude.

[@Dragonian05]

“When is the Purge actually?” I would not want human Google as my enemy. He knows my search history and pretty sure he knows how to track down my location.

[@chanterelle483]

You fool, he knows exactly where you are right now! All the time!

[@18Hongo]

Google is the nearest we have ever come to creating an omniscient being. I do NOT want to go up against humanity's best attempt at a god.

[@corvanj8766]

@@18Hongo especially when it's got a lot of dirt on every single user too...

[@landon8214]

He already knows everything about you and your entire family

[@bruceanthony8345]

6:30 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@alexwansss]

The bits with the lady in green just made me really sad for real. I'm crying. I forgot how dark and hopeless it feels, because I got numb and got used to it, but somewhere in the back of my mind I'm still wishing for things to go back to how it was, still hoping that the pandemic will be "over", but it won't be. Hearing her ask "How long quarantine?" just reminded me that I wondered about that too, and still do.

[@johnbees4443]

Just remember Winnie the Pooh gave you the Flu

[@LOL-bs1hg]

Ever since it ended it hasn't felt the same before covid

[@NotxbossThexbot]

​@@LOL-bs1hg still hasn't ended, especially not during the time ypu created your comment. But too many people were tired of the quarantine stuff and being jobless/basically jobless and theres vaccines now so people kinda just tried going back to how it was before.

[@JamesGrim08]

Must really suck knowing nearly everything we went through was unnecessary. Things feel different than before for sure, but thats because we woke up to being lied to by those we use to trust. Than we realized our own neighbors would throw away personal liberty for temporary safety. Everything, even the damn masks, wasnt needed... yet you still have people today ,like that comment above, that believe hook line and sinker. Its amazing how stupid America has become.

[@woolfieMcP]

"..and this says 2021" Ме one year ago "Hahaha, no way" Me now: "...oh" "I have longer if you want" NO GOD PLEASE NO

[@PlanetComputer]

ok

[@dacheeseproductions6005]

ok

[@derekdogs1463]

Ok

[@katyusha_kat]

same

[@ilikeoranges1408]

Ok

[@adamrohac8441]

"This one says 2021." Well well well, look who is predicting the future.

[@keineken_3281]

I wish 😔

[@fluffyflufffox1385]

And the terrorism part came true as well

[@VistaAllen]

I think more like early 2022

[@FlamingFoxProd]

@@StupiderWithAB Plot twist, nobody gives a shit

[@PlanetComputer]

ok

[@Crimson_Sun2486]

"When _is_ the Purge, actually?" Words can't possibly describe how much I felt that line

[@RicoDubs]

"exclamation point, but for quiet" that one got me

[@glorycastillo5379]

I don’t get it

[@GimmeMyHandleBack]

I wonder if it’s ¡ instead of !

[@r.dragon3763]

It's " ..."

[@PerovNigma]

​@@glorycastillo5379 They're wondering how you would punctuate someone speaking quietly, but with emphasis, such as in a whispered argument.

[@cam_luong]

​@GimmeMyHandleBack ¡ is used in spanish and is the same as ! But goes at the start of an exclamation. Example: ¡Ay caramba!

[@Zythria]

I forgot just how HEART WRENCHING these quarantine videos get at the end. That poor woman in that green shirt.

[@paul.g4572]

H o r n y .

[@tempo6316]

L o n l e y a n d h o r n y

[@IcewaveAce]

Lol

[@yadayada736]

That's us

[@lazybuddah9639]

Yeah

[@buleleader]

My favorite is still, "Covid real? NO! wait... TOO LATE!"

[@nubreed13]

The dyslexia joke at the end was the best

[@Dragonian05]

Stroke of brilliance right there.

[@elijaha773]

*I mean

[@ethenmadison7678]

This I agree is the best one

[@protogenhorde8515]

i loved it too

[@jaxp3950]

I’m not gonna lie, the guy who keeps asking random stuff is the most relatable

[@phantommangagirl]

I remember back at the start of quarantine when companies were like, “What piece of nostalgia will cheer people up?” And this was CH’s contribution. I’ll always appreciate this series for getting me through the initial hump. :)

[@confusioned2249]

"I have longer if you want" Then we laughed, but now we know that wasn't a joke

[@damiankaleomontero496]

Hi

[@matasa7463]

I read the scientific reports meant for the government. The project was originally 12-18 months. I'm thinking that the 18 month projection is the most accurate - we should reach high levels of vaccination rates at around middle of 2021, and start to see effect of herd immunity at around the end of the year.

[@jfish032]

🥺😪

[@xenasBS]

@@matasa7463 except we're halfway through 2021 and a bunch of countries are opening everything up so the virus can flare up harder than ever before so it'll probably be a while longer after all.

[@demolisherman1763]

What are you guys planning to do for the two year lockdown anniversary(yes it’s in like April but at this rate we’ll make it to the 3 year anniversary easily)? I’m going to Not go outside Not see friends And not go to the movies!

[@americankid7782]

Dude: Mayan calendar Google: 2012 Dude: Mayan dyslexia Google: Why would- oh no

[@melissazurbriggen6170]

Welp its the end time's boys and girls. You better find you tin foil caps from 2012

[@berthaaiman5236]

@@melissazurbriggen6170 We gon' die dis year

[@berthaaiman5236]

@VelocityRaptor Siba Goatlama Rice-Ban

[@glenmcgillivray4707]

Except we have an antiviral. Which means we will have to be careful of new flavors spreading from hotspots across the world regardless. Africa could take years to eliminate. But at least the Pope isn't spouting antivax nonsense. Wait.

[@ZT1ST]

Look on the bright side - it could also be 2102 or 2201.

[@Mr_Tf28]

I love how at the end of every video there's a heart to heart it's really sweet

[@RaindropsBleeding]

3:15 hurts. not because I feel it now, but because I felt it then, when everything first shut down, and I had to emotionally support all of my friends who hadn't experienced real depression before, and it nearly sent me back under. the sheer memory still makes me cry. 2020 was such a bad year I wish I could forget, but know I shouldn't.

[@Tiga_UltraSuperiorGojira]

“Mayans end of world year”? “Mayans dyslexic”?

[@shingles1465]

Took me a minute to get what they meant with that joke

[@cahilavcs1601]

@@shingles1465 I still don't get it.

[@vailedshaman3334]

@@cahilavcs1601 2012 the world was to end, but 2021 is when covid is swapping of numbers

[@mal5256]

or historians dyslexic

[@SkyHacker9]

"what do you mea-" "ohh, shhhi..."

[@ashulman1931]

He has a chill side in this one

[@Silver_Sonic_23]

I don’t know how that’s possible.

[@treygreen5015]

Don't we all tbh

[@PlanetComputer]

ok

[@DANCEYpants95]

its the "mojitos" lol

[@antonymilne1346]

I like that with quarantine sending people doolally, his patience for the bizarre got bigger to help out. Surprisingly wholesome for a quick comedy sketch

[@renascienza.bazarclub]

One year later, and the green shirt lady still break my heart...

[@idcgaming518]

"How to feel normal" ouch. That hit me pretty hard. Since this pandemic began, I lost two close family members, my grades slipped heavily (first in A-levels, which is the thing brits do usually for 2 years before going to uni, then my first year of uni - which actually led to me dropping out), me and the few friends I had have drifted apart, and I've been slowly but surely isolated from the world. COVID even recently interrupted me right as I was starting a new job and me and mum were planning to have a holiday abroad, by infecting her first, on the week we were meant to go, then me, the following week. Everyday, I question why I exist. I don't think I'll ever be brave enough to take myself out, but I certainly just want to stop feeling things right now. But this, makes me smile. Thanks, collegehumour.

[@declanfleming7400]

Stay strong brother

[@Trainfan1055Janathan]

"Horny." Relatable.

[@PlanetComputer]

ok

[@indianscammer471]

ok

[@larious]

Ahoy~

[@katzewerfer63]

oh god yes xD

[@billnye8760]

DR FAUCY SHIRTLESS TIME!

[@fruityallday]

Don't forget incognito guy if you ever run out of ideas

[@monikakavaliunaite8017]

"incognito mode" * Google guy puts on a hat, glasses and dims the lights *

[@BlackCover95]

@@monikakavaliunaite8017 Don’t forget the trench coat with the collar turned up! Alternatively, 🥸

[@aftonfangacha3557]

That video would be NOTHING BUT PORN

[@lakshaymenghani6535]

@@aftonfangacha3557 nope sometimes it will be very dumb questions or for searching items so that they don't advertise you those items.

[@DuckiBoiHasPizza]

@@monikakavaliunaite8017 thats *the deep weebbb....*

[@joost00555]

The genuine concerned Google answers were very sweet, thank you.

[@brittanyrocket]

"How to feel normal" made me tear up.

[@dungeonmaster9800]

The parts with the brunette in the green shirt got too real.

[@notdragonzyt9933]

Ikr

[@capterson4]

"How to feel... normal." Jesus, that line.

[@joshstephens413]

I know. It hurts a lot.

[@ryanbarham8464]

Sorry lady. This IS normal now.

[@sam4gaming135]

Yeah I was expecting her to say " how to feel normal, romanticising a cereal killer" or something like that ( I thought it was the same girl who wanted cute pictures of a bombing)

[@Dino23968]

How to avoid suffering a breakdown from quarantine like cabin fever

[@timmyppt]

Yea this is the new crazy/normal whatever you want to call it. It got real a few times

[@ZablerAceStudios]

“Mayan dyslexia” “What do you mean… oooooooohhhhh shiiii” That made me laugh more than it should of

[@moonstone2029]

Wow, that one woman saying "how to feel... normal..." made me burst into fucking tears

[@LezbionestHere]

*Meekly* "Exlaimation point but for quiet?" *Soft smile and chuckle* "Lets find out. This was such a genuinely sweet and touching voice acting

[@racdiecoon4994]

‽ s o you know is an exclamtion point but for quiet

[@pixelpython7567]

@@racdiecoon4994 Nah, that is not it. This, ᵎ, is it

[@maxmeepmeep991]

@@pixelpython7567 baby exclamation mark

[@archie6890]

@@pixelpython7567 that seems like the thing people do when they sound like their shouting but their whimpering

[@wiggle143]

Why don’t we make it this: ¡ It’ll really confuse Spanish speakers till we can find a better one

[@darthnater9819]

Mayans dyslexia is a conspiracy I can get behind

[@Archangel.Azrael]

2012 Or 2021?

[@Dino23968]

How to avoid suffering a breakdown from quarantine like cabin fever

[@willlavine1105]

me too

[@collinpersinger4809]

It could actually be 2102 or 2201, maybe even 2210. Possibility is there.

[@ihatemotionblur_3255]

@@collinpersinger4809 no lol

[@linkibear8644]

6:33 “YOU ARE THE PURGE!”

[@CornDogJohn]

"do they call coronavirus budweiser virus in mexico" "was nancy pelosi the impostor" this got me laughing so hard

[@melodyrivas2777]

The "great news, Im the internet" always gets me. Its adds humor without spoiling the moment.

[@paulpule]

"Exclamation point, but for quiet" 💀

[@LeonelLAURE]

What does that mean???

[@anttweezy87]

This gets me every time 😭 💀 🤣

[@typhoonzebra]

@@LeonelLAURE it means he's asking for a punctuation mark that indicates that you're being quiet

[@hattielankford4775]

But that second one, though. 😢

[@zt3853]

Yeah but now I really want to know

[@itsmeerinchoiii]

I love how the models are exactly the same style as google’s recent advertisements

[@nathanthanatos3743]

"Can you train a plant" Yes. It's called Bonsai.

[@anonymous_person8280]

"Mayans dyslexia?" Oh god

[@silverflight01]

Newton predicted that something similar to the end of the world would happen in 2060.

[@wisenotwise2676]

@@silverflight01 well, it doesn't matter, anyone of us can die anytime and we're not immortal

[@aidoll3692]

@@wisenotwise2676 idk about you though but like some ways to die are a lot less painful than others.

[@montecarlowithdawningornam1817]

@@wisenotwise2676 I am immortal untill proven otherwise

[@TingusPingus445]

“Avocado pit huge why” “Don’t speak in these weird haikus”

[@enchantedspoon759]

timestamp?

[@TingusPingus445]

@@enchantedspoon759 it’s from the original if Google was a guy series specifically episode 2 or 3 it’s a call back

[@enchantedspoon759]

@@TingusPingus445 ohh lol

[@ventexovakon2178]

Avocado be huge why*

[@TingusPingus445]

@@ventexovakon2178 no it’s avocado pit huge why

[@david4rancibia34]

6:01 MARBLELYMPICS Gotta support the hazers and balls of chaos this season

[@Bsznmsc]

Personally up for the Thunderbolts but best of luck

[@midnightthefairy8747]

Hazers are the best!

[@wilson352doesstuff2]

Melow yellow

[@KazeDov]

3:40 (heart explodes) awww.

[@samp-w7439]

Lol "this one says 2021." Well here we are

[@kittykittybangbang9367]

Well pandemics do last a long time

[@elenas3571]

The last time I was this early these sketches were live action!

[@bigcheese6926]

Your moms house

[@Tizzy_Rose]

Same-

[@jamie.lee717]

Right

[@KatieTheDev]

Same

[@StupiderWithAB]

If you want to see something almost funny check out my stupid comedy videos. 😶🤔

[@ryanthoms]

These videos are gonna be a huge nostalgia trip in a couple years

[@wandatherranova4258]

I wait for this series every single year to keep my humor stay moist

[@djhoops25]

“What’s the business?” “Shakeshack?” “Oh just some mom and pop shack”

[@PlanetComputer]

ok

[@jomarcentermjm]

Sadly most loan would be approved if a known brand is involved.

[@bthsr7113]

There were a LOT of people conning safety net programs like paycheck protection program.

[@noobishanimations1809]

"I have longer if u want" Little did college humor know that they were WAY too accurate

[@bthsr7113]

Still going. I'm also losing my mind!

[@KagaiYami]

we need so much more of this

[@retoscholly5538]

Please, guys, more of this! I so love these!

[@ztnarff5439]

Too bad everything's sold out lol that was realistic in the beginning of the pandemic and is a little accurate right now

[@StupiderWithAB]

If you want to see something almost funny check out my stupid comedy videos. 😶🤔

[@AxxLAfriku]

I STRONGLY DISAGREE! Being as famous as I am on KZbin, I know that it gets hard to read every comment I get. I try my best, but I am just so famous, that I can't do it much longer. Sorry, dear zn

[@101Crock]

@@AxxLAfriku wtf is wrong with you?

[@eaglestryker1338]

"9mm in bulk".

[@moistnugget4147]

@@AxxLAfriku I strongly disagree with your existence.

[@LibertyPrime21240]

“All the toilet paper!” “There’s no need-!” “All the beans!” “To horde stuff!” “Extra Freezer?” “That’s not so bad-“ “To horde vaccines!”

[@johnbees4443]

How to protect all dogs from Fauci?

[@musicwithoutanyboundaries]

Loved this series!

[@jeffrinjustin9479]

6:43 even Google hates tiktok

[@hatmentionmansion7403]

Who doesnt

[@shreyaskumaragarwal3343]

Yeah. Who would not hate competition. We now have yt shorts with the same cringe content.

[@wackyanimations3326]

@@shreyaskumaragarwal3343 yt shorts are filled with tiktok videos.

[@silverflight01]

CollegeHumor, definitely.

[@dooda9566]

@@shreyaskumaragarwal3343 not you comparing yt to tiktok

[@GeneralAblon]

"Second wave..." Tl;dr: "We are doomed." ".............Feminism...." I laughed way harder than I should have at that.

[@bubbanator3340]

Same answer lol

[@skelliebeeper5693]

Glad these are still being made, Hope you can make more in 2022.

[@bthsr7113]

Plenty of material for it.

[@elouis5436]

By animating this, you've made it funnier than it could have ever been with a live person! Keep up the hilarity. Thanks!!!

[@moniquecash]

Now I have to look up "exclamation point, but for quiet"

[@meoff7602]

Good luck

[@racdiecoon4994]

‽ is the exclamation point but for quiet

[@Sam-on5jf]

the lady being sad over 2-6 months breaks my heart

[@qut22vp83]

The “last year new year’s resolutions“ hit very hard😅so....sending live to everyone I guess🙌🏾

[@bthsr7113]

Still accurate

[@Summer-xe6in]

This is a great video. Thanks for making this! I laughed! ^_^

[@harveyts3]

For the record, for who might be wondering when the oil price was negative, that is exactly how it worked. They paid companies to take the oil and those companies stored it then solid it back. This was mostly done by the same ships that would normally deliver it, but instead of taking it someplace, they just sailed around-plenty of info online about what happened and its implications.

[@vickibannister2689]

why did all the soft ones about not pushing yourself make me start crying lol xxx mental stability we don't know her xx

[@donkeyhobo34]

I love you, Vicki pooh 💕

[@dekzYT]

never met her 😍

[@kaylaosborn2774]

Glad I’m not the only one

[@MaskedNozza]

Got me good 😭

[@vickibannister2689]

@@MaskedNozza right??

[@Shadow__X]

I literally googled "calculate volume cylinder" a few days ago even though I knew it already, but my grandpa didn't believe me because I learned a different formula than he did

[@sarahwick6514]

I wish I talked to my grandpa about cylinder volumes

[@quinny98]

Great archive video ❤

[@JuniorExecutive1987]

I clicked expecting more silly distractions and found a relatable human message and some therapy... thank you

[@jonboybluegaming]

Google was a Guy is the funniest series. I understand its probably hard to keep a series like this going but thank you nonetheless. Hope to one day have more episodes.

[@DrGreatScott]

This is one of CH's best series (both live action and animated). I hope we get another "season"

[@HAVENTYOUPPLEVERHEARDOF]

Ukelele course did NOT age well!!!

[@DudeNamedRon]

"If duckduckgo was a guy" It's just a guy sitting at his desk waiting for something to happen.

[@manjodhgosal]

Like Bing

[@massivredboi2646]

nah, everyone would be wearing hoods so that you couldn't see who they were

[@wyrdingroom6081]

the guy tapping all the ducks to get to goose would need arms six feet long! 🤣

[@kevinvanveen3260]

I imagine that scene from eyes wide shut.

[@a.j.9115]

Or like a really respectful butler (NO NOT JEEVES)

[@LetsPlayNintendoITA2023]

this 2 parter was a blast thanks

[@shomu_og2841]

4:23 the most cursed line i have heard so far

[@Cessated]

He’s asking the real questions though

[@Pancakemaster64]

We we’re almost there

[@pianomews9509]

3:15 Man, this is the first time I’ve watched the quarantine version and I never knew how much this would hit after a year into the pandemic 😢

[@TreVotheJoke]

Wholesome without toxicity towards toxic people i love it

[@naqidoesps4860]

"Horny" "Great news!" *Pulls out a fat stack of paper* "I'm the Internet."

[@spacepotato1880]

“What is tiktok?” “Oh please, don’t summon him!!!” Peak content

[@frenchtoast7188]

College humour been making us laugh for a long time. Respect

[@momoavatar4960]

random woman: scared. google: You're not alone... random woman: lonely. google: We all are. random woman: impatient: google: Look, I get it. We have to be patient for a while longer, or we risk losing more lives.. A lot more lives. random woman: ...horny google: great news. im the internet (pulls out stack of paper)

[@TheAnimeEncyclopedia]

@Mr7Reality or that he is used to everyone from the first time google was a guy

[@brittcampbell1805]

That was my fav part

[@ZT1ST]

@@TheAnimeEncyclopedia "Finally, a good proactive use of this skill I've built up over many, many of people's disappointing searches."

[@RookieMonoLith]

7:49 *Shoot On Iphone*

[@kyouutube8648]

Thank you so much. God bless you guys. I haven't laughed in a while. You made my day. 💛

[@whatsinadeadname]

I just realized the 'dumb' questions are very much like what elementary students ask their school teachers; I also recall teachers suggesting googling things when students have questions when they have iPads.

[@jsowau]

Such a great clip, really humanising and honest👍

[@gregoryvn3]

This is the best thing you guys have ever done.

[@MikeJones-qn1gz]

Man good job college humour we all need a good laugh these days at the situation we’re in.

[@taoxme2498]

Keep up the great work!

[@user-um7wd1tb7j]

This was a great way to educate people while also having fun

[@theandyman88]

"Covid-19 Real" "NO" "I mean-" "Too late!" Best part

[@MidnightO42]

Wtf. Was not expecting the gut punch of "how to feel normal"

[@MaskedNozza]

😢

[@sarahlarson2172]

LOL.

[@froggman66]

0:49 love it “wooo, mojitos!”

[@coalescence4479]

This is such a sweet series.

[@atlasguytinyproductions55]

I’m glad they revived the series just for fun

[@gm2407]

Googler: Confirmation bias Google: Studies have shown... Googler: Confirmation bias not a real thing Google: Ohhhhhhh.

[@thebeingdestroyerofworlds8690]

the guy with irrelevant questions is my spirit animal

[@ttthecat]

As a green shirt lady, these videos made me feel better! Thanks College Humor! 🤗

[@jazzlewin3133]

Make more... It's too good!

[@moistnugget4147]

That little girl is asking a lot of good questions about Santa

[@johnbobsons4179]

11:50 I literally said "oh shit" at the exact same time

[@optimuslemonpie5268]

Let’s just say we’re lucky to know that it was debunked as untrue.

[@optimuslemonpie5268]

Still suffering but the world hasn’t fully ended yet

[@henrystark3746]

@@optimuslemonpie5268 read it backwards 2021. 2102

[@jonathanschmitt5762]

What did he google?

[@maritoguionyo]

2021