In Search of Door-Kicker Santa: TF Watches RED ONE

Рет қаралды 4,624

Күн бұрын

Our last free episode of 2024 involves Riley, Milo, and November watching the Rock in a terrible Christmas film entitled RED ONE. It’s a film in which Christmas is saved by the surveillance state, jacked Santa trains in the gym to do room-clearing and be an operator, and so much more. This is our present to you: we have suffered.
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Trashfuture are: Riley (@raaleh ( / raaleh ) ), Milo (@Milo_Edwards ( / milo_edwards ) ), Hussein (@HKesvani ( / hkesvani ) ), Nate (@inthesedeserts ( / inthesedeserts ) ), and November (@postoctobrist ( / postoctobrist ) )

Пікірлер: 40

@capsjukebox Ай бұрын

This film’s streaming numbers were the most Fell-Asleep-With-The -TV-On numbers ever.

@mhopwood1 Ай бұрын

It's... deep voice... THE RED ONE

@LawIV Ай бұрын

This is my first trash future lmfao

@Frisco1355 Ай бұрын

WTYP and this within 2 days? It’s a Christmas miracle!

@caidurkan2916 Ай бұрын

'Film installed off of the Steam Workshop' is such a powerful descriptor for 2020s films. Don't get me wrong there's actually been lots of good cinema being released recently but the only films that so called normal people seem to talk about are the cackhanded overbudgeted messes that feel like they were assembled in a fugue state by overworked mentats.

@thomaspalazzolo5902 Ай бұрын

Surprisingly J.K. Simmons also played "Santa" in one of the BEST Christmas movies I've seen in recent years, Klaus.

@stephendaley266 Ай бұрын

Red One is basically the joke movie from the start of Scrooged.

@thomaspalazzolo5902 Ай бұрын

Just once instead of a modern Christmas movie going, "oh no the naughty list is way bigger than ever, only like five nice people left," I'd love for it to be, "oh yeah it's mostly nice people, there's always fewer and fewer naughty people, but some of the remaining naughty have become absolute bastards."

@philtai1265 Ай бұрын

56:30 not me thinking Tannerite is named after Rory Kinnear's Tanner

@philtai1265 Ай бұрын

16:44 the actual plot of Argylle involves a brain injury to CIA double agent and. also. at points in that movie you do feel like you are experiencing another brain injury

@thomaspalazzolo5902 Ай бұрын

I suggest the honest-to-god real Rambo Christmas Special, Rambo: When SAVAGE Stole Santa.

@thomaspalazzolo5902 Ай бұрын

One and a half million PER MINUTE and they still couldn't afford to shoot it in color.

@darrens3 Ай бұрын

Horrifying.

@thomaspalazzolo5902 Ай бұрын

Hallmark Presents: Rock Frosty

@mhopwood1 Ай бұрын

Most recent Jacked Pope? I submit for your consideration Julius II PP: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Julius_II "Nicknamed the Warrior Pope, the Battle Pope or the Fearsome Pope, it is often speculated that he had chosen his papal name not in honor of Pope Julius I but in emulation of Julius Caesar." I think this is the Pope who got shot up by cannons and was like, bring it

@FionaOfMountLawley Ай бұрын

The Apostle Peter was a fisherman, and I'd assume regularly pulled on the oars, hauled in the main sheet and both threw out and pulled in the nets. He might have been the last whose lifestyle had depended on physical exertion. Move on about 550 years you get to that 7 year old boy who held that role after his family purchased it for only him to resign two years later aged 9.

@mhopwood1 Ай бұрын

@FionaOfMountLawley yes!!!

@franslair2199 Ай бұрын

Okay but the military stuff being named against some second class type of guy designated by genetics is exactly like things being named Apache, Comanche, Chinook, etc

@ZannyAisling Ай бұрын

these jokes are getting dangerously close to the plot of Elves, released in 1989 starring Dan Haggerty, Deanna Lund, and Ken Carpenter

@MeonLights Ай бұрын

I feel like "Military Style Christmas" was much better done in Arthur Christmas. The jokes about well trained suoergadgeted elves landed and the ultimate message was not "the troops are based" 😅

@Smilecountry. Ай бұрын

24:10 now imagine a civ div type santa forces volunteer

@hpalpha7323 Ай бұрын

Hot take: Red One is an excellent movie to get drunk and watch with friends

@kimielle Ай бұрын

You do not need Seagal to come back at all. He kidnapped and repeatedly assaulted a woman.

@napalmholocaust9093 Ай бұрын

Watch "Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny". *prolly only rifftrax tho.

@FreeSamich Ай бұрын

Is this movie just the Christmas-ized Wish cinematic adaptation of Artemis Fowl?

@trioptimum9027 Ай бұрын

Okay but look, the thing about Russian Santa is he's Orthodox, right? Orthodox Chrimbo ain't until Jan 7th! Still time to get the shirt out!

@vaska00762 Ай бұрын

Several weeks ago, Dwayne Johnson and Lucy Liu were on The Graham Norton Show to promote that movie, and the clip they showed was kinda grim. But like, Dwayne and Lucy were both typing the movie up, and idk if they're just contractually obligated to do so, or what... but uh.... idk, I kinda tune into The Graham Norton Show semi reliabily, since it's on after the BBC News at 10, and I have a next to non-existent social life where a Friday night is really just watching the TV, and it's kinda fun watching two Hollywood A-listers and then two niche UK figures, usually a comedian and a broadcaster, get slowly drunk while being talked to by a gay Irish man, who used to be on that sitcom written by the transphobe. Though... usually The Graham Norton Show is followed by a rerun of that week's Drag Race UK, (or that reality show that's basically gay/lesbian love island with Kylie Minogue), so it's basically the gay shut-in programming slot on the BBC. This has been a rant, but watching the only good talkshow in the UK is basically slowly revealing all of Hollywood to be creatively bankrupt. Then again, they interviewed Selena Gomez and Zoe Saldaña for the Emilia Perez movie, and they said nothing about it (everyone I've talked to who's seen it says it's a horrific mockery of the trans lived experience), but Zoe spent way more time talking about her mother loving to watch 1960s Star Trek in Spanish, and that was cute.

@MrJohndoakes Ай бұрын

Yes, the hype is an obligation, especially for a big-budget movie.

@FionaOfMountLawley Ай бұрын

Oh thank God. I read your post and the first thing I thought about Graham Norton being in Father Ted was a sense of uncertainty about whether Ardal O''Hanlon somehow became Graham Norton. Then I checked his filmography and obviously Graham Norton is Graham Norton (and did some guest appearances on the same show) while Ardal O'Hanlon is a different person with a separate existence from him.

@vaska00762 Ай бұрын

@@FionaOfMountLawley the thing that pains me to no end about that series is that it's basically Irish Month Python, in so much that everyone quotes it all the bloody damn time across basically all of the island of Ireland. Words like "ecumenical" have been almost permanently ruined, as people only associate the word with the series. The other series, with Richard Ayoade and Chris O'Dowd has kinda died off, and ceased being culturally relevant. But no one, literally no one, can help themselves quote "g'wan" or "maybe I like the misery", like it's been engraved into their memory. Even the icon for the Irish subreddit, r/Ireland is taken from the series, specifically "A Song for Europe".

@trioptimum9027 Ай бұрын

@@FionaOfMountLawley The two genders brackets Irish?

@stephensmith7327 Ай бұрын

You gotta check out Prep & Landing and maybe it's sequel because its this idea but good or at least competent. Two 22 minute specals just so you know

@type6 Ай бұрын

Santa's Workshop was reskinned Asgaard, wasn't it?

@franslair2199 Ай бұрын

HOW DID YOU NOT CALL THE RUSSIAN SANTA MOVIE "ДЕД ONE"

@MegaPhester Ай бұрын

Milo should be fined for doing a Danish accent. We do not sound like Uter from the Simpsons. We sound like potato-mouthed alcoholics who think we're better than you.