Independence As A Blind Person...

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WRITTEN ON SCREEN:
6:56 - I’ve also come to realize that plenty of sighted adults don’t or can’t cook either!
9:06 - I also felt like at 23, I was too old to still live with a parents and then I checked myself and realized how many people do that and it’s totally normal and not a big deal!
9:26 - It was making smart financial decisions like splitting rent instead of renting alone that allowed me to buy my first home at 27!
15:01 - You typically aren’t allowed to wear a hat or sunglasses in soccer at the level I was playing due to safety, so he’d tell them to make sure they wouldn’t make me take it off or leave the field!
16:44 - For example, I know that if I am not eating out, don’t have a food service, or don’t have someone to cook dinner for me, I CAN put together a yummy and healthy meal for myself to eat!
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I'm Molly, a typical sushi, makeup, and fashion loving millennial girl who just so happens to be blind! I was diagnosed with Retinitis Pigmentosa at just 4 years old and began public speaking at age 5. I started just doing motivational speaking, but now I make videos and even model! Even though I can’t see, I know that there are bright spots in everything we face. Let’s find them together. 💕

[@MollyBurkeOfficial]

Independence, whether you're disabled or not, looks and feels different for everyone. Do what feels right for you and let others do what's best for them!

[@sngray11]

Thank you for making this video and sharing your perspective and words of wisdom with all of us! 💗

[@alizarehman1790]

Molly I found this video incredible from a blind woman’s perspective you know I was nodding along to so much of what you were saying because as a blind woman myself I hear and see all of what you speak about and I am one of those people who wants to do things independently but realise that hey I’m not wonder woman and I can’t do things independently and I am very thankful that there are lots of technologies that can assist me when I don’t have sighted assistance

[@ElizabethDohertyThomas]

AMEN sister! Also the idea of independence has hurt a lot of people. Examples include all the folks with born disabilities, all the adults who got frail in their old age... these people had built in community in their family. Nobody was independent! You stayed in your family unless you got married, and even then a ton of couples lived with family or even if they didn't, the idea was they were setting up a home to eventually care for their aging parents or their disabled siblings when their parents passed away. This is still actually the case in many non-westernized nations. I am 45 and work with my dad and now hire my 16 year old son for some work. I'd laugh at anyone who judged me for that! Most people rightfully think it's the coolest thing ever. As do I think your mom is super cool and you two have a fantastic working relationship. That said, I'm still learning to advocate for my needs with so many invisible illnesses and a body that seems to be just fine. We are all a work in progress! :-)

[@brigidscaldron]

Thank you. I’m 52 and have rheumatoid arthritis and have become disabled from joint damage and chronic illness. My internal ableism is by far the worst. (However it’s not cool when others do it to me, either!)

[@pinkybear8082]

I'm actually disgusted that even your own community bullies you :( on top of all the sighted people coming at you even blind people take jabs at you... :( you would think that they understand the struggles you go through. Just few days ago I ran into a video about and it was not a good one. I said what I had to say to them. I hope you know Molly that you have single handed made millions of peoples lives better! ❤️ You have a heart of gold! I hope you always remember that those people are probably just jealous and you have done nothing wrong! I wish all the best for you ❤️

[@AJ-kx9mb]

"There is nothing wrong with letting people who love you, help you." - Uncle Iroh

[@kjs22]

In between sips of tea of course 😉

[@amyhoover9]

I see your a person of good culture. I love a lot of Iroh's sentiments in the Avatar series :)

[@thaliarojas6763]

We all need uncle Iroh in our lives.

[@ev_green_]

Love him , love Avatar. Very quotable

[@hopewelch3307]

“Asking for help doesn’t mean you have failed…Failing to ask for help is failing yourself” 100% Molly, and you’re right, what other people think of you is their business and not yours. Thank you for this video topic

[@mayorlewispurpleshorts9693]

I’m an able-bodied 21 year old who still lives with my parents. I’ve had people judge me for it, and I’ve had people tell my parents they should just kick me out. So hearing Molly talk about independence like this is honestly so helpful and validating. Thank you Molly. 🥺 💖

[@tiryaclearsong421]

I lived with my parents until I was 26. All the way through undergrad and applying for graduate school. I felt bad sometimes about it, but I truly needed the support. I always had a job but never made enough to live on my own with roommates in decent conditions.

[@katedutchie]

I am living at hope at 23. No plans to move out soon as I can’t afford it.

[@ev_green_]

Maybe it's more normal for Christians to live at home if you are totally fine only living with your spouse when you are married BUT being in my mid 20s I will move out whenever I want cause I'm not going to see if marriage is in my future before I do things I want..... BUT living alone is scary.

[@sviolet892]

I do not understand the judgment arround employing your family! You started a business and basically get to help support your parents through it! I think that's so wonderful!!!💕

[@Narlynaarr]

I honestly only trust my mom. If I could work with my mom It would be a dream

[@NoThankUBeQuiet]

I mean. There is definitely a reason to not do it. See Britney

[@cosmicjules]

it's so evident that her parents and her have an amazing relationship and if it's just as good in a professional setting, why not have them help out? it's a no brainer to me.

[@Narlynaarr]

@@NoThankUBeQuiet obviously doesn’t apply to all parents. Lol 😂

[@harveyabel1354]

Many a business is family owned and operated - and that's just fine!

[@kaitlynryan216]

I am totally blind myself, and definitely feel that this is a good topic that needs to be discussed. Thank you so much for making this video. Also, I am fortunate to say that my parents never hid the fact that I am blind. I started learning how to say my eye condition when I was four or five, because of the fact that I was born totally blind.

[@intesivec0re]

I love that your super Kaitlyn😁

[@imscanon]

There's an important difference between living with your parent and your parent living with you. I think people forget that. You pay the bills and make most of the decisions. When I told my Mom I was moving to CA, she said 'When are we leaving?". Mind you, I lived in Michigan and she lived in Indiana, but didn't want me that far away and not see me. So for 24 years, she lived out there w/ me. I paid the bills, she cooked. Great deal for me! LOL She passed last year and boy am I thankful to have had all those years making memories with her! People questioned it all the time. Then they met her and understood because she's awesome.

[@MeeblesSporella]

I'm 36, am financially stable and live with my mom because I love living with her.

[@elliannaandreen7120]

As a fellow disabled person, I love the sentiment of not needing to do everything to be independent.

[@foreversweaterweather]

I'm chronically ill and not well enough to work or drive and so my mum supports me financially and drives me to appointments or the store or wherever I need to go (I'm 23), it's incredibly hard to live that way because obviously I wish to be independent and do those things on my own, but what makes it even harder is others judging me thinking there's no way I could be sick enough to not work. People have often assumed I'm just lazy, which couldn't be further from the truth. I actually cried the other day because I needed some clothes and my mum was gonna take me to get them and pay for them. So my point is don't judge others situations because you have no idea how much they're struggling and how badly they wish they could be independent.

[@beautyizeasy]

I’m also chronically ill, 23, and live with my parents. I can’t work right now either because I’m too ill and I don’t have good enough vision to drive so I can’t drive either. My parents take me everywhere and do just about everything for me. I 100% feel what you are going through. I read your words and it sounds like something I could have written myself. Being in this position can suck a lot and I feel like everyone judges me and keeps telling me I am not “trying hard enough to get better” even though what I have is genetic and chronic so it’s not going to get any better. Right now taking care of my basic needs is my full time job, I can’t do anymore more work than that and that’s okay. I know you probably feel very alone in your situation, but just know that you are not alone. I know what you are going through and I’m sure you are trying your best every day. You are not lazy, you are ill. There is a difference. I’m sure you push yourself very hard and to the point of exhaustion just to make it through the day. You probably put up with so much shit that other people don’t even know about and I’m sure you hide that all with a smile and pretend to be okay. It is exhausting pretending to be okay when you feel like hell. I don’t know what illness you deal with but I’m sure it is probably emotionally and physically painful because just about every single chronic illness is. You are resilient and you are trying your best. Even if people in your life tell you that you aren’t trying hard enough or that you are lazy, you know the truth, I know the truth, and people who truly care about you know the truth. I’m sorry you feel judged by others for not working, I have felt that same judgement and I know how much it hurts. I know I’m just a stranger on the Internet but I believe in you and know you are trying your best. I wish you the best 💕 btw I’m not actually Louis Tomlinson, just a random chick who is a fan of him

[@foreversweaterweather]

@@beautyizeasy Oh my gosh I teared up reading your reply. In a lot of ways our lives are so similar it's crazy!! I always feel completely alone because I don't personally know anyone my age who's chronically ill and relies on parents. I watch others in their 20s go about their lives the way I always thought I would but now can't and it feels like it's me and me alone going through this. Thank you so much for everything you said, honestly words could never truly express how glad I am to know someone out there can understand me and how it feels to live this way. 💙

[@beautyizeasy]

@@foreversweaterweather I’m happy my words meant a lot to you. I don’t know anyone my age that is chronically ill either(or if they are they are well enough to work, go to college, and live on their own). It was really tough seeing all of my friends graduate college the last few years and get new jobs and tell me about how busy they are and then look at me and say like, “it must be nice to just stay at home and sleep all day”. Like no actually I had 2 doctors appointments today, a blood draw, and then spent 30 minutes waiting at the pharmacy because they messed up my prescription, and then spent an hour and 45 minutes on the phone arguing with the insurance company because they won’t pay for treatment that my doctor says I need that I can’t get without them paying for it because I have $0 of income, and then I fell asleep while eating dinner and didn’t have enough energy to shower SO ACTUALLY I would rather be working! Haha I wish I could just pop off like that. So many people just don’t know what it’s like. Everyone says your 20s are supposed to be the prime of your life and when you are supposed to socialize, date, try new activities, find yourself, etc. And I’m like “yeah okay mom and dad which one of you wants to drive me to the bar for my friend’s 24th birthday and then push me around in my wheelchair because I don’t have the arm strength to push myself and I’m not gonna ask one of my drunk friends to do it. Also the party is in 3 days so if I start resting now and then don’t do anything for the next 3 days I should be able to have enough energy to last a few hours at the party and then have 4 days to recover which should be enough time to rest before my haircut next week” 🙃 Like no, I think I’m just gonna stay home. But all your friends don’t see preparation that goes into going out and just think “wow she bailed on us again and this time on a birthday, how rude”. No one sees that. There is no rule book for how to date while chronically ill and who to tell what info to and how to put up with relatives telling you to try yoga. Being young and chronically ill is such an odd situation because you are an adult and have been for a few years but you feel like a child. It can be very isolating but finding support groups and getting therapy can help. There will always be someone else going through something similar. You never know where you will find someone you relate to. Sometimes even in a random comment section on KZbin 😂 I’m rooting for you! We are doing our best!

[@kellimshaver]

To me, independence doesn't mean being able to do everything. It's the ability to make a desired thing happen - that could mean me doing it myself, asking someone else to do it, paying someone to do it, whatever. If I can make the thing happen, then that's independence. It's more about my ability to find solutions to getting and doing the things I want/need than to personally accomplish tasks.

[@Christinabean96]

YES! love this

[@sageashley]

So silly for people to judge you for employing your mom - I would do the exact same thing are you kidding?! Who else would you want to spend all your time with and help get rich?!?! My whole fam would be on my payroll if I could, keep doing you Molly!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

I honestly thing they are just jealous. If I personally get the privilege of hiring family to work with me I would do it faster than a heartbeat.

[@jesslikescoffee24]

I’m growing into my disabled identity as a late diagnosed autistic person. I went directly from living with my mom to my now-spouse. In the last few years as I’ve struggled with burnout and not working, I’ve been very reflective of how much I haven’t been “independent” and in need of my spouse’s support, despite how “high functioning” I may appear to others. So as much as I’ve been a stay-at-home spouse and taking care of cooking and such, I’ve also been significantly supported all around.

[@NS-pf7jr]

Your story is my story, I don't know what I would've done without my spouse. To look so "normal" and "high functioning" is hard sometimes.

[@LauraDora124]

Right there with you, late diagnosis and all ❤️ I’m still living at home, but I hope I can live with my partner eventually. It’s just taking longer.

[@pawnderingtails9687]

I just got my autism diagnosis this year (I'll be 34 in a couple of months). I really struggled with trying to be independent and do the things I should be able to do. Now my goal is to use the resources I need to if it will cause me less stress rather than strive for independence.

[@morganann7759]

I just want to say that when it comes it Autism, "functioning" labels don't exist. Autism is just Autism. There's no such thing as "high" or "low" functioning.

[@jesslikescoffee24]

@@morganann7759 I’m very familiar, hence the use of quotation marks ☺️

[@denisewebb5073]

Molly, you are right “the world is expensive.” If I had a family, I’d live with someone. I’m able bodied, single, social worker, and always strapped for money. It’s emotionally draining every day!

[@sviolet892]

That "potatoes" bit is the highlight of my week 😂🥰🥰🥰

[@kaylapatek8421]

My issue, I’m job searching, is WHEN to disclose I have low vision...

[@CuddlePhantom]

I'm blinding in my left eye and when people hear that they often say they're sorry. Like, I'm okay. It's genuinely the least of my problems! At 19, I can still see through my right normally with corrective lenses. My main disability is my crippling chronic anxiety. I had a panic attack while volunteering at a 4H camp yesterday and got dismissed. I'm back home now and I feel like there is no clear path for me. Like moly, I look fine to other people until there is something I can't do. So, although we don't have the same problems. It's cool to see them doing so much and encouraging to see them overcome adversity.

[@carlintaylor4006]

As someone who is also blind in their left eye and also has anxiety... I hear you, and I am right there with you

[@CuddlePhantom]

@@carlintaylor4006 thanks man! That means a lot. :) 🤍🤍🤍

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

I have anxiety too and lately my panic disorder has returned after years of what I thought was me being cured from it. I'm terrified I will lose a lot of my soul to this problem. A lot of people don't understand how crippling anxiety disorders are and how much they leech your energy and mind. :( I'm sorry.

[@CuddlePhantom]

@@dont_harsh_my_mellow i understand, and I'm sorry too. 🤍🤍🤍 You, your feelings, and problems are valid babe

[@taniajansen3650]

Hi I'm blind in my left eye and only 12% in my right I have anxiety and panic attacks to ' stay true to yourself and know we are ok one day at a time panic sucks and it can hit the road

[@complainielainie]

I love the point on being ok with different levels of independence. It’s been hard for me to accept but I think more than anything my loved ones just want to know *how* they can help.. so the more I can identify specifically where I do need help, the better

[@gwillis01]

Being specific is very good. As a sighted person who wants to be helpful, I want specifics on how to help out in the best way.

[@hernameispekka_Rebecca]

Very true! My friends flat out said "thank you for being so good at wording what you need from us". It really helps the people around you (if they are decent people) when you ask for help, because they already want to help you but might not know how!

[@beverlydust5381]

Disabled or not everyone has things that they are good at, and things that they are not good at. Everyone has their own situations and people need to respect that. I'm much older and I was taught to hide my disability in my school life and applying for jobs.

[@ashp5597]

You are so right. Being a visually impaired person, I feel there is so many Waze I am not independent in but as I get older I realise that independence is individual and different for everyone. PS I recognised your name from Joel and Leah channel😊

[@matheuscastello6554]

as someone diagnosed with adhd and possibly on the autism spectrum i feel this issue of independence so much :( with my parents being so controlling, hoarding me to do x or y, or just not being able to do things like have a phone call, answer an e-mail, do a project for university... it's very frustrating, i think we feel this lack of independence in very different ways but my heart goes out to the blind community and any other disabled identities! here's hoping we can all find the independence we want ^^

[@dont_harsh_my_mellow]

I'm not blind but I have ADHD. I relate soooo much. I always felt A LOT of guilt and felt like I was a burden on my family for needing help and reminders and all that. But IDK why. I resonate with the whole concept of this video so much! I agree!

[@mirjamschaart]

I think there's so much strength and independence in knowing and communicating what you want or need from someone. It's not about doing everything on your own, it's about knowing what it is you can't do or don't want to do and having no shame in needing or wanting help.

[@kyliejewell8795]

When can we expect to see Adrian again?? I loved the content with both of you!

[@0Yazz]

I never really understood the culture of shaming people for still living at home because I come from a culture where that is the norm. Here, almost no one lives alone because usually kids only move out when they get married and the elderly move in with family members when they need care. But in the west, for some reason it's a thing to pressure people to move out as soon as legally possible and shaming them when they dont.

[@Autumndapple]

I recently saw a video from another blind KZbinr criticizing you for being too dependent. I went in with an open mind, but decided I definitely disagreed. The main thing running through my head while watching was "But it's okay to ask for help! Whether you Need It need it, or if it just makes something difficult easier." unafraidunashamed of asking for help has helped me learn that it's okay for me to do those things too. Thank you, Molly. 🖤

[@pawnderingtails9687]

Needed this. I just learned in June that I am Autistic. I cried when I read the report and it said I was level 2 and needed significant support. I haven't been working for the last couple years as my husband's income supports us and being married and working really overwhelmed me. I am trying to find a way to work from home by starting a bookclub here on KZbin (different channel than the one I am commenting from it's called Tibbara's Den) and with a blog creating discussion questions on the books we read. Going back out in the world just isn't for me at this point. Before getting married I lived with my mom well into my twenties, but still prided myself on my independence as we kind of supported each other. It is hard to realize I need that support at this time in my life. I also struggled for a long time realizing I needed a service dog. Once I started utilizing her my whole life changed. Now I go with her or with my husband. My mental health is in a lot better place not trying so hard to be independent but use the resources and support I need. Thank you for making this video, it really spoke to me.

[@ChristianSullivan]

I was never raised to be scared of saying I’m visually impaired to people. My parents always told me that I need to ask for help when I need it. They don’t hide the fact I’m disabled. They are very supportive. Also, to not be ashamed of my blindness either. I’m happy about that! All my family wants is what’s best for my own life.

[@ChristianSullivan]

@@niabarley4615 I love that about those teachers! My teachers tell me that same thing. When I cross a stop light intersection alone, I feel accomplished. Because I get scared sometimes of how many cars there are. I also don’t live in an area where I need to cross to many of those intersections.

[@ChristianSullivan]

@@niabarley4615 Agreed!

[@mallorylischer]

I’m an amputee, living on my sister’s property helping with kids, animals and such. I help her and she helps me.

[@thomasnguyen6144]

There’s a lot of negative attitudes towards people with disabilities. I find that we are always proving to society that we can do it. It’s exhausting. I’m tired of people asking who takes care of me. Treat us like normal people.

[@skybloom1381]

Wow this video was on par with being a Ted Talk. I love it. Molly's videos do not disappoint!

[@Maddym365]

Molly, I’m not blind, or disabled, but lately I’ve been struggling with the fact that I’m single as heck, living with my grandma and I’ll be 27 in September. But I need to realize that I have other things that make me feel independent, I recently got a job that makes more than I’ve ever had. So it’s OK that I live alone and I needed to hear this. THANK YOU. You’re the best

[@Maggie.can.hug.every.cat.]

I feel like this also applies to able bodied people. Like we need to de-stigmatise having help. Whether it be help with meals, hiring a cleaner, living with family or friends as an adult so you can share responsibilities. For me, I find having my groceries delivered helps so much, and after years of trying to keep my space clean I finally hired a cleaner. I also really struggle with motivation so even as an adult my mum regularly comes over and drags me out for a walk and reminds me to water my plants. I have recently gone back to uni part time to become a social worker, and I have been learning how seriously unnatural complete independence is. We as humans are interdependent. Naturally we live in groups and rely on each other and to strive for complete independence is totally not what we are meant for. Regardless of if someone would be capable of surviving entirely alone, that is not how we are supposed to live, so this lie we have been fed by capitalist patriarchal society is just so damaging to all of us.

[@luvbex00]

Yes! Our individualistic culture could benefit from becoming more collectivist

[@RobertKingett]

I could not have said it better

[@rubyrose3553]

I am blind and I try to be as independent as I can at school I have a vision teacher who goes to every single class with me and I really do appreciate the help but sometimes they take my independence away I love being social and talking to people but with the teacher there I think people are scared to talk to me I try as hard as I can to talk to the people in my class they just don’t want to talk around a Teacher I recently got a liquid level indicator so now I can make my own tea it makes me happy every time I do I also learnt how to make scrambled eggs and even though it’s easy meal and sighted people could easily make it it makes me feel independent

[@marynaloboda4922]

Thanks Molly It was important I needed to hear this. I am 30 almost Live with my mum, cuz yeah: it's expensive to live alone somewhere else. Instead of paying rent for other flat, i am investing money in pastry, baking,studying, buying equipment etc. I am trying my own little business: cakes, cupcakes, mousse cakes, macarons etc)) i love it.

[@harveyabel1354]

Wish you much future success!

[@marynaloboda4922]

@@harveyabel1354 thank you kindly!

[@marynaloboda4922]

@@harveyabel1354 also wish you all the best

[@laurenwallace8204]

This is some really interesting insight Molly! What you said about feeling the need to do more than able bodied adults do in order to feel independent reminds me of what you’ve said about other aspects of your life, that in order to be equal you need to be better. I’m currently at that turning point in my life where I’ll need to be more independent. I’m graduating college and will need to support myself more, it’s very scary even though I’m able bodied myself. While my family is still supportive and willing to help, I feel the need to prove and support myself.

[@courtneypalmer2331]

Okay great so Madrian is still a thing :) I am actually in the process of saving money alongside my mum so we can buy a home together. We are both disabled, me, partially sighted and my mum in a wheelchair, it just makes more sense for us as a unit. When I find a husband I have made it absolutely clear that they have to be okay with us living with my mum so I can help care for her. She also helps me mentally and with certain things I just can't do. So... teamwork! Yay/1 Anyway, don't let anybody make you feel and about working with your mom because she is awesome!

[@alexandraalberti5029]

As I a disabled person I am very independent. My brain sometimes forgets I can’t do it all because I am not like “most” people. So, I tend to overdue it. Then, my body pays for it for a couple days ago. It is definitely hard to ask for help. I have learned that I need help.

[@__insomnia_]

I was crying after 5:54 about independence as a desabled person. I'm not blind, but I have physical desabilities. I have noticed that to be independend doesn't mean to do everything by your own! Every person has to accept some help in life.

[@aratreyadoesthings4924]

Molly you are seriously the strongest most independent girl I know, and that's including sighted people lol. I LOVE YOU!

[@tmntaddict]

1) Not asking for help can be devastating(my older sis waited a long time after her cancer diagnosis to tell anyone or start getting help)--never be afraid or embarrassed! 2)There are many stigmas around "having family help your business." Unless your family are a bunch of Karens or you're a healthy, functioning 40-yr old mooching off of mom &/or dad, then there should be no judgement.

[@AliceSylph]

Embarrassment over disability is hard. I was undiagnosed disabled growing up, but symptoms were definitely there. Fellow family members have some of the same disabilities as me, and never were able to work or live alone etc. I feel my parents ignored my growing symptoms and pushed me to "not let my conditions define/stop me". That's resulted in some really bad state of mind and self-hate. I'm dealing with the gradual loss of independence and is heartbreaking. I have small goals that are important to me, so if I can do those things, other things I can compromise or stop doing. I don't know how my bad my symptoms are going to get, or how fast, so I can't plan for the future, I can only do what I can do now.

[@melissacoviello2886]

I am hard of hearing, so is my husband and our youngest, our 13 year old son is Deaf, and most of my side of the family is hard of hearing. For us it’s “normal”. My 22 year old son and 18 year old son have normal hearing and in our family that makes them the weird ones. Lol I agree 100% about not treating your disabilities as something shameful. I lean in to it and take up the space I deserve as an individual and I advocate for myself and definitely for my kids.

[@angelinaveneziano5303]

Thinking about the meltdown I had not being able to handle upkeep in my college apartment. I simply didn't have the energy to handle my workload and cleaning my apartment. I was spreading myself incredibly thin, and my mental health suffered in that period of time. That last year I decided to commute and moved back home. That took a lot of the pressure off me. I had a lot of relatives teased me and acted like I was being lazy. That allowed me to perform highly as a student.

[@kaylapainter2630]

I’m totally blind. I’m 26 years old and still live with my mom. I don’t want to live on my own because I’m too scared to.

[@francescoleman-williams911]

I hope no one makes you feel like you have to live on your own. You are no more or less of a person. There’s no need to prove anything to anyone else, what you do or don’t do is your business and you don’t need to explain yourself.

[@IndigoJo]

As for cooking, a lot of cooking equipment nowadays is very inaccessible to blind people. I have a hob that is entirely flat; the hot spots are flush with the rest of the top and there aren't buttons or knobs, just pressure pads. My microwave is the same.

[@b.v.skijump432]

Oh wow. Didn't knew you have such a big team. That is freaking awsome. Yes you had a team but SO BIG!! Crazy! Can you explain the business side of this channel?

[@katherineleemckay8576]

“Pull a Graham Stephan”.. as someone who watches him, that got a giggle out of me!

[@latter-daykit-kat4963]

Same XD

[@lijohnyoutube101]

Yep!!

[@Aluciel286]

People have been employing family since the first job there was. It shouldn't matter what the job is or what the capabilities of the employer are. Judging people is stupid.

[@meghanfowell7306]

My parents never explained to me that I was blind/visually impaired. It took me until 21 to fully figure it out/understand. I'm still struggling to not be embarrassed or feel ashamed that I can't see. I love my parents but its extremely hard.

[@lijohnyoutube101]

I just can not comprehend this. I am so sorry.

[@laura-sandy1492]

I’m so sorry to hear this but I can totally relate as well, I lost my site at the age of seven and I have only had light perception remaining ever since. Whenever I introduce myself to someone as blind, my family always correct me and say “visually impaired” instead because they don’t like the word “blind”, and I feel that this has subconsciously reflected on me and significantly damaged me over the years which is just so unfortunate. Just like you, I love my family but I don’t love this shame they have instilled in my disability which has made me less confident and more hard on myself, especially when it comes to independence. It is truly damaging and it’s such a shame that this is a re-occurring theme amongst many families with disabled people in them. I really hope we can break this cycle one day…

[@meghanfowell7306]

@@laura-sandy1492 I've never related to a comment as much as this one. I haven't had many opportunities to talk with other blind people. Thank you so much for helping me feel less alone in this journey.

[@laura-sandy1492]

@@meghanfowell7306 Awww I'm so glad this helped you because you're definitely not alone, it's actually such a common theme in the disability community as a whole. I am atually lucky enough to be in a few blind FaceBook groups, such as VI Talk and UK VI BAME Network, in which people sometimes share their struggles with this, and it has definitely helped a lot. Please feel free to reach out any time if you ever need to talk or just for someone to undersand, I'll be happy to do so. Sending you warm wishes 🥰

[@user-co8id5px1r]

You couldn’t have picked a better business partner. Your mother is awesome!

[@Nikotastik]

It took me over decade to get over my mother telling me I’m “playing the victim” whenever I disclosed my disability and asked for help. I still feel a bit ashamed every time I need to ask for an accommodation. It’s a constant mental battle, but I think if we would all stop judging each other about our “independence” or lack thereof, that would be a fantastic step in the right direction. Let’s just all be happy. :)

[@deee1776]

Hi Molly, I’m a sighted person and HATE cooking! I find it really stressful too. I hope this is ok, but my husband was born with a very rare condition called PKU. This is a very tough condition to manage. He’s trying to raise awareness of this condition by blogging. His page / link to everything is called ‘The Truth About Life With PKU.’ We would both appreciate it so much if you share this information with all your followers etc. He’s trying to get into writing as well, and this is one of his platforms for doing so. We’d both be so grateful. Thank you.

[@maddynoel7393]

I am a blind high school senior and I was diagnosed with octave nerve hyperplasia at six months old. I can honestly say that independence has been a struggle for me over the years and it’s some thing I’ve been ashamed of. But I’m getting better and watching your video definitely makes me feel that I’m not alone so thank you for this💕

[@simplyshannon9053]

I am not disabled and do not cook and also moved back in with my parents for 4 years from 30-34! Best money saving decision I have ever made and they both passed young within 2 years of me moving out! I am so grateful for that that time! Dependence looks difference for everyone!

[@jayegbo1979]

Wow. I am so proud of you. This is perhaps the most important video you have ever done. Good for you. You really inspire me as a visually impaired person myself.

[@JennaPalmerioo]

I'm visually impaired and currently rely on government assitance for income. I am only now starting to realize how much shame I have about being financially dependent on the government. My vision loss began when I was 10, and I remember beginning to feel this intense sense of dread around the prospect of working as an adult. I believed I was worthless and would never be able to find a job. I didn't know any disabled or visually impaired people, had been exposed to basically no representations of potential role models. I think I was so terrified that I could never work and earn my own money that I convinced myself it wasn't important to me. But since this year I'm starting to realize that may not be true, and that it also may not be true that I will never earn my own money doing something I'm interested in. Becoming financially independeent has become a goal. Watching videos like these where a blind person very unapologetically speaks about how important having achieved financial independence has been for her is very healing. Thank you

[@taylorq23]

I was born with learning disabilities and some physical disabilities and I was always ashamed to tell people and I still get embarrassed to tell people because my parents never taught me not to feel ashamed by it but I am slowly working on trying to not care what people think and be proud of who I am . I am trying to feel less ashamed telling people about my disabilities because I’m trying not to care what people think . recently got a tattoo that says “It’s ok to be different “ Took me a very long time to realize that but it is true and as I’ve gotten older I realized it even more

[@tylernelsonn4251]

I’m 20 and currently in a 18-22 program for blind ppl to learn to be independent at the school for the blind in Austin Texas

[@rachaelpino6914]

I think it is great that you work with your mom. It just goes to show that if you have a supportive network behind you, you can accomplish so much. As a legally blind person, I have struggled with reaching out for help because I feel sometimes when I ask for help It puts me in a vulnerable position where the person helping me chooses not to respect my boundaries, and the help I receive becomes leverage for them. It is so good to see that those who do help you respect your autonomy and enable you to reach your full potential.

[@justasmalltowngirl774]

As someone who was forced into independence, (moved out on my 18th birthday... And had to pay for everything down to my own tampons at 13 by getting a job.. never had parents give any assistance) I've always been proud of my independence.... But I've always wondered what it would be be like to have help in some aspects of life. That side of things is such a great mystery to me that I'm always a smidge jelous I haven't had the chance to experience...

[@dasha_ucko]

Even though I'm fully abled, this video still really helped me because I hate asking people for help with anything, and this made me realize that asking for help doesn't make you any weaker or less capable.

[@KP-ness]

The reason Lavender sits on the chairs after you've sat there is because they're comforted by your scent, so the most recent spot that you've been makes the most sense to them

[@andreaanderson1580]

Wow this is so accurate for me and I am only 6 minutes in. I am not blind but I am disabled and I always put on myself to do everything myself

[@rhyss8580]

I have low vision and am currently living in a university dorm while studying and have had to become more independent. This was a great video and very refreshing to hear about someone that has had similar struggles.

[@user-qq8gm5pr5n]

Girl you’re a boss. You’ve built this business that makes such a positive impact ✨ You open up this beautiful dialogue that shares the joys and struggles of living with a disability. That visibility is so crucial towards making positive changes towards a better future for everyone. It gives those of us also struggling with our own disabilities a community to go to where we can feel supported and understood. You’re awesome! 😊

[@magicalmonique]

I would love to meet your team & learn what their roles are in helping you run your business!

[@JM-ig4ed]

I trip and fall all the time and I am fully sighted - that would probably be my bigger fear if I was blind - just tripping over little bumps etc on the sidewalk It's not the big stuff... its the little stuff.

[@lovelearnersofaredhead892]

I'm sorry that there are nasty internet bullies that pick on you. I am sighted and my body is able but super unhealthy asking for help was ridiculously hard. I think independence is something we all strive for and try to hold on to but those that pick on you about your Mom are jealous. They probably don't have good relationships with their parents. You are doing amazing dear and I wish I was as close and healthy with my daughter and my parents as you are!

[@lykander9906]

My wife and I hired a cleaning service. (We're both able-bodied, I have a mental illness) We *could* do it ourselves, but when we tried we fought so much that it was worth the money to get help.

[@melissaz6778]

As a paraplegic, I appreciated this. Thank you

[@toniajeen]

I think it's great that you have such a good relationship with your family that you can work and live with them.

[@pvdm709]

What you say is so true. And i love you can work with your mom, that is the person you trust, so why not make tbat choice

[@laurahrobinson]

Thank you for this! I am able-bodied aside from a chronic illness, and sometimes struggle to accept my need for help. This is an important message for everyone!

[@sashawhite7491]

I am vision impair and cerebral palsy and caring for my friend who is blind too she is a amazing woman just like you

[@Aaraishaaz]

Sometimes my friends or sister or brother do something really really fun and I want to do it but the adult with us says "Oh you can't do that because your blind," and that always is from frustrateing. That's because I know that I can do it they just won't let me show them. Which I can understand, they don't want me to get hurt trying but even so...

[@bonjouritsizzy3405]

I think even for sighted people, like when I say I still live at home with my parents, I am somehow not grown or an adult. Rent & living on your own isn't cheap, and until I can afford to do so, while finishing college, I am taking my parents up on their offer because I have that privilege, but doesn't mean I don't help out like paying for bills here and there, cleaning, cooking, buying groceries, and things like that. So honestly, I understand because I feel like not having an apartment at my age I am seen as less than.

[@lburton874]

Living with parents… as long it is a mutually beneficial agreement between parent and child that’s all that matters. Mutually beneficial does not mean money. Being a “good” cook is not a sign of independence but rather being able to keep them self feed is independence regardless if the food is cooked.

[@laurenschenck5355]

Independent is most important for everyone especially with those that have a disability as long we make the right decisions in life and we don’t want to fail feel bad for now being independent about our selfs I agree with you Molly ✨😀🌟♥️✨❤️💕👑✨❤️🌟♥️✨🌟⭐️👑✨❤️🧚🏻‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️👑✨♥️🌟💕✨✨👑🧚🏻‍♀️⭐️💕🌟✨❤️🌟👑🥂🧚🏻‍♀️🌟💕⭐️

[@jegcreator]

My big one is not being able to drive. I’ve pretty much accepted it isn’t ever gonna happen, but some people I’m close with still convinced I’ll eventually be able to drive... don’t think it’s gonna happen lol. But I’m fine with not being able to drive, I would rather live that life than cause an accident.

[@photogrifmike]

One of your best messages! Thank you

[@vovan7349]

Thank you for bringing up this topic! Abybody should not be afraid/ashamed to ask for help in any situation

[@TreJarrey]

Oh I needed this today! Thank you! 💪🏻

[@AstraSystem]

Such a great message. My disabilities aren't so visible and at 37 I'm still working on advocating for myself when I need some help or accommodations. I think I ought to be able to do it on my own (this is because they're not always visible disabilities and so people assume that I'm fully able-bodied and I feel like I need to live up to that), which is ridiculous because I'm a therapist and I absolutely would NEVER tell my clients such a harsh thing. In fact, I lovingly chide them for this sort of thinking. And yet I beat myself up over it even today. Anyway, sorry for the long comment. I just really loved the message here. Your channel has long been one of my favorites.

[@moondustcompliments5329]

Amazing topic

[@ducky9357]

You are speaking the truth!!!! Thank you 😊

[@raccoonspirit5369]

1) I think that it’s wonderful you have that relationship with your mum that you can be business partners (not that you need validation from me) 2) I work for a non-profit org that provides services to the elderly to keep them in their homes for as long as possible. Even though an aid is doing laundry, housekeeping and checking in multiple times a day, that elderly person feels independent because he/she is still living in his/her own home. 3) As an abled body individual, I appreciate when a disabled person tells me how I can help…or not to help. I always feel compelled to help the elderly and disabled, but do NOT want them to feel belittled or patronized by me.

[@JW-pi2pp]

I am able bodied but have struggled for years learning to ask for help. I am always afraid of seeking weak or dumb and will go out of my way to not ask for help. I used to pride myself on being able to figure things out by myself and it became a huge burden on my mind when I couldn't do that. I wanted to prove my independence so badly I would cause myself severe anxiety... Since then I've been working hard to teach myself that it is okay to ask for help. I still struggle more days than not but the reward of simply asking for help is so much greater than I ever anticipated.

[@elysezupi637]

Thank you Molly! I needed to hear that

[@lhalison87]

I as a fully sighted person cannot cook to save my life!! Independence looks different for everyone. Thank you for talking about this.

[@Eva-qz6if]

That’s good advice Molly great video! 😃👍

[@alliesigns8049]

This is a amazing video!

[@bonnieworley1159]

So well said, as always.

[@__insomnia_]

I try to ignore negatif jugements, from people that doesn't know me well or people that doesn't want the best for me and those who are just envious.

[@linneawilliams5542]

This is something I needed to hear today. Thank you

[@josiemize4822]

Great message i enjoyed watching this

[@intesivec0re]

Your fabulous Molly, you do it!

[@faithloveandvisionloss7939]

Hi Molly. You are absolutely right when you say all blind/visually impaired people have different goals and different definitions of independence. My definition is different from colleagues at the San Diego Center for the Blind. Right now I am working on ONM and also technology so that I can go back to work. I applaud you for always speaking your mind. My KZbin videos are such a disaster, it's a good thing I can't really see them lol. God bless you and keep doing your thing.

[@JSJA19640]

Beautifully said

[@CELERITAS-BONITAS]

Almost at 2 million subs. Great work Molly 😻

[@JenMarco]

Great video Molly!