I grew up with a narcissistic mother. The problem is the way women are treated in this culture. Women are not just mothers. Women are human beings with their own needs. When women's emotional needs aren't met, they are emotionally unavailable to meet their children's emotional needs.
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
Someone pls xplain what a narcissistic mother is.
@razvanzamfir85618 ай бұрын
Cheers for this insight. The way you wrote this comments seems that you had childhood trauma caused by your mom and you were able to overcome the pain and forgive her. Any useful book/ program that helped you do that? Thanks
@MrsAbbyManning6 ай бұрын
@@razvanzamfir8561have you read any text about forgiveness in the Bible?
@robynhope2195 ай бұрын
@@orahzamir3562 makes sense..ur mother was deprived
@marifhossain Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing. Along with Mark's work, a complementary work is Family Constellation Therapy there the dead ancestors or parents of the adopted childs are brought into play and the client can observe the dynamics and can heal himself or herself of the past trauma. This work is originally done by Bert Hellinger. There client can perticipate in the healing process himself. There are some fascinating videos including schizophrenia. Hope this will help many who are passing through conditions of extreme trauma, depression that generated at many generations back.
@dancer123962 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the validation. Its been hard not to resent my mom for giving me her trauma even though it's not her fault
@selmananic6393 жыл бұрын
I have just started working with a therapist on a trauma that I have experienced 30 yrs ago and I am so happy to get this video in my email today 🙏🏽
@Jasmine-ww6tb11 ай бұрын
From one of the earliest childhood trauma I can remember was being a young girl (from 3-7) and was terrified of being deployed to war. As I got older the fear has started to dissipate. The topic of war still rattles me sometimes but this all makes sense because my grandpa was force to go to war and my mother when she was a child and around the same age at the time had to go into hiding. my father was also very young and was terrified of being deployed for war and he also came from a military background. I never understood why I had this intense fear since I came from loving parents that didn’t speak about war around me and I didn’t know about their childhood experience until my late teens. I just had this intense anxiety that I might be deployed, I had to fight, and possible die at a young age. Very interesting and thank you for sharing what you have discovered. This study has defiantly put a lot of new insight for me.
@cindychurch335 Жыл бұрын
Wow, this is never ending! It means virtually ever human whoever lived or will live has or had trauma. So I’m a 66 year old grandmother who had unresolved trauma until recently. This means it was too late for my children and grandchildren. 😢
@roottoflywithkamila Жыл бұрын
It’s never too late to help your children and grandchildren heal. When you resolve your trauma it is felt in the family line from both directions I believe. Be the example for them of healing and help them understand what you have to come learn. That will be the greatest gift you can ever give them.
@jeankoehler7 ай бұрын
Not true at all. You’re 66 and you’re resolving the trauma ‘inflicted’ on you by your ancestors. There are remedies (you’ve recently learned this!)… I think that’s the point of the book.
@marvinvargas46552 ай бұрын
Hello to each of those who will see this message, it is never too late to help heal the traumas of our families, this book is a true treasure from which I have learned. 3:23
@alrosserphotography12933 жыл бұрын
This has been soo helpful. My father died before I was born, and my mum wasn't emotionally available, so a lot of this resonates with me and helps me understand myself a little better. I will definitely be coming back for another listen
@chilloften3 жыл бұрын
Wow, it’s so crucial, parenting.
@nkinyori3 жыл бұрын
Wow. I may have to come back to this again and again. So many gems! I felt triggered and empowered at the same time 😁
@belencristina3 жыл бұрын
Wow, this is such a treat! I'm currently reading this book. Thank you.
@contactlight80793 жыл бұрын
My entire family is trauma. Both parents and all 4 grandparents had top quality trauma. I wouldn't know who to pin my inherited trauma on to. Loved the book BTW.
@punyashloka49465 ай бұрын
Heal yourself.
@Soulfulsomatic3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the work YOU are sharing. Incredibly appreciate the light you shine and the leadership you embody.
@BarbaraTechel Жыл бұрын
I'm understanding this more and more all the time - and Mark's book is so helpful! Thank you for the beautiful discussion.
@veronicafiore11493 жыл бұрын
Fantastic enlightening interview. So deep and powerful. Thank you so much for sharing.
@hadasabutbul96653 жыл бұрын
So many things are being connected and understood.. Thank you so much for this amazing and healing interview 😇💗
@abookhoarder78023 жыл бұрын
I have been recommending this book since I read it about a year ago. Mark has such an awesome vibe.
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
Yes, I like him better than Gabor.
@simonaberardozzi66002 жыл бұрын
Thank you Sheleana for this amazing interview with Mark Wolynn. I litterally loved every word, so so interesting. I liked when he talked about the 4 different ways of "breaking the bond" with our mothers and how this can impact on us. I was wondering if this can be related with a break in the bond with our father too. Thank you 🙏
@colleenmitchell52085 ай бұрын
So so much trauma in my family.. My mother had no attachment to us and we became estranged since I was a young child.. Now as a mother my self I'm estranged from my children.. Your right.. But I do t know how to help.. It's been sooo long..
@robynhope2195 ай бұрын
@@colleenmitchell5208 my BIGGEST regret is having two now disinherited sons. The pain and anger in my heart will never go away.😢
@valerieteahan-tebby24402 ай бұрын
The same for me too. My son died my daughter estranged. Me estranged from mom family.
@robynhope2192 ай бұрын
@@colleenmitchell5208 yes, of course...we had no role models to be attached to our children.
@robynhope2192 ай бұрын
@@valerieteahan-tebby2440 sorry to hear about your son ☹️
@christinemartinez2485 Жыл бұрын
I am shocked, my daughter sees how her dad neg. affected her but now I see how much I continued the trauma. 😢Time for healing ❤
@jessicaf6358 Жыл бұрын
27:00 Edward Tronick "Still Face Experiment" spoken of.
@Maximus-gp7td2 жыл бұрын
Fantastic interview, I appreciate it. Thank you.
@ryanpalma59472 жыл бұрын
Wow that Alzheimer’s comment was profound, this was a phenomenal dialogue , outstanding work
@Aurora-Rose013 жыл бұрын
I found this extremely healing it had me in tears. Thank you so much for doing this one🙏 much love 💖
@linesyverinsen92153 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for this amazing interview!
@skbains863 жыл бұрын
This is fascinating and thank you for sharing your experience and wisdom.
@NiKi-ij2ln Жыл бұрын
I resonate soo much yes...I am 24 year old son living with my mom, and trying to heal this inherited trauma etc, I came to this through astrology, the Pluto Moon conjunction which I have ...thank you for this, its amazing ❤🙏😇
@november123ishАй бұрын
Thank you for this reading ❤
@MFK19673 жыл бұрын
Fascinating and compelling - frightening
@FRM8883 жыл бұрын
Thank you very much for this.
@Riddhimma.bansal2 жыл бұрын
I wonder if our dads who physically abused our mums loved us? Our moms did. Did our dads?
@felinedaze20583 жыл бұрын
Thank you for making this video. I really appreciate it and I feel armed with insight and a starting point for me to heal, and to be able to speak to my children and my partner. Thank you. 🙏
@creatingdigitalassets3 жыл бұрын
Excellent video Sheleana
@AndreaBuck2110 ай бұрын
Great interview, thank you 🩵
@YuliaGrushevskaya-bi6he Жыл бұрын
😊I see it clearly now how horribly cruel my mother was and is to me and how she is suffering herself and that I simply run away from her abd how good I felt when i was in a new environment!) I really was in pain in my family, there are lots of happy families and parents that are loving incouraging and not victims of their life! My mother is so toxique that I was pisically ill being next to her. In host families I was happy! Away I am happy!)❤🎉 I don't wanna carry her stuff with me wanna be happy❤🎉😊!
@SnuubScadoob4 ай бұрын
Yeah... I'm pretty sure I didn't "inherit" the beatings my dad gave me. I sure as fuck did inherit all the mental issues that came along with his abuse though. As well as all the problems I've had regulating my emotions.
@josesolano6364Ай бұрын
Your dad was only doing what his dad did to him , he never overcame the fact that we can correct that .
@stellabrown909 Жыл бұрын
Same with slavery
@markartist8646 Жыл бұрын
And what if the parents are abusive narcissists???
@candidadaniels7231 Жыл бұрын
Is there a link to the referenced interview on fathers? Thank you!
@EveBriere-zb8bz9 ай бұрын
Thanks for this video! When is the new book coming out ??
@chanamiriam89232 жыл бұрын
Wow thank you for this.
@Cocobelle962 жыл бұрын
Really low volume :(
@suzanneatwood88553 жыл бұрын
I missed the point about how to heal if you never knew your parent, as you did not know your father or who he was even. Can someone explain?
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
Can't explain without the book in front of me, but he does cover your question in It Didn't Start With You.
@leroygreen18778 ай бұрын
Im screwed my family tree on both sides has nothing but truamas. Explain why my cptsd is so bad.....sigh
@reg82973 жыл бұрын
I so want nothing to do with my ansestors they totally destroyed me
@RisingWoman3 жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry. Sending you love
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
I completely understand...I posted about that It's counterintuitive, isn't it!
@connieharrison5738 Жыл бұрын
How would this trauma manifest in a 1 month old infant?
@rosannaellis49653 жыл бұрын
Please can you post the video that Mark spoke about with the mother and baby?
@RisingWoman3 жыл бұрын
Yes, thank you for the reminder. I just updated the video description to include a link to the still face experiment. ~ Shay
@reg82973 жыл бұрын
@@RisingWoman how do we heal life long effects of child abuse and all our ansestors child abuse I'm in counselling traumatised from life long effects of child abuse my mother abused me her mother abused her how do I heal this I met man who abused me he tried to teach my kids to abuse me I'm so destroyed I am. So. Angry at my mother this is what she did to me yet I cannot find way out to feel peace happy or move on from all the damage my mother did to me then I thínk she was abused riduculed as well had no way of feeding us how do I heal all this damage
@RisingWoman3 жыл бұрын
@@reg8297 I'm so sorry that you've been through that, that's so incredibly hard and painful. Those wounds run deep and you're definitely not alone. One thing that I've found to help me heal is Somatic Experiencing Therapy combined with this work in Inherited Family Trauma. If you can find a practitioner who does somatic experiencing table work, that's the most ideal. Sending you big love and healing vibes on the journey ahead.
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
I wish Mark would see this and reply to qs ppl might have. What good is commenting with no replies from the expert😢
@deniselesicka22205 ай бұрын
SO much emphasis put on the mother- almost solely on the mother. Why don’t any of the baby books or pregnancy books talk about this? So much in society encourages moms to return to work when the baby is 3 or 4 months old. Shows and movies have very little positive mother-child interaction, or just not a lot of frequency. And for people whose mothers weren’t around during developmental years, it’s hard to know how to parent; it doesn’t come naturally as we weren’t given that intense and continual positive, loving attention. Why don’t the baby classes they give at hospitals while moms are pregnant- why don’t they cover the importance of mother’s emotional state, attentiveness, positive state of mind- that her every move & thought (literally) will affect the baby? That they literally absorb everything about us? That we aren’t really separate beings? Why aren’t there more check-ins and assessments of the pregnant woman and new mother to ensure she is mothering well? After 2 days in the hospital, you’re sent home on your own, maybe not even knowing what you’re doing! And not all of us have extended family to help or check in on us!!
@robynhope219 Жыл бұрын
The book is perfect for victims who werent too badly abused by parents. However, if trauma/abuse was very severe, cozying up to evil parents makes no sense...u want to write them off. My parents weren't evil, but it would not be exaggerated to say THEY RUINED MY LIFE.
@punyashloka49465 ай бұрын
Yeah thats true but neverlethless it can help a lot of people.
@robynhope2195 ай бұрын
@@punyashloka4946 I guess...
@joanlally97577 ай бұрын
this man is talking about trauma and he has no concern with animal testing...how shutdown is that!!!. TOTAL CRUELTY that he cannot even feel towards other sentinent beings...I'm so upset by this..the poor animals being subjected to cruelty..