Insecurity, Emotional Spending, Rich Friends and Jake Paul: A Q&A With Therapist Kati Morton

[@thefinancialdiet]

In this episode of the Chelsea sits down with Kati Morton, a licensed therapist. In this Q and A they tackle questions cornering finances and our mental health. Want more tips on how to protect your mental health as much as you protect your finances ? Check out this video: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qKrYZ2qDpM2Ujqs

[@chocolatechick729]

Chelsea what are your financial goals are you aiming to become wealthy and be in the millionaire/billionaire club? I'm curious 🤔

[@jackthezoo]

I like the way Kati uses the word "we" to describe mental health problems people may be facing. makes those issues seem much less isolating and like she's on your team

[@himariana_2755]

Right! Like we're working together :)

[@noworriessoap5494]

While I love all the things TFD, I truly enjoyed this chat with Kati. Finding out the WHY helps us find control. I look forward to more episodes.

[@thefinancialdiet]

Thanks so much for you feedback !

[@musikhamster01]

Others people success is not your failure" - Christian Borle (one of the best quotes to keep in mind whenever you are doubting yourself)

[@Zeynep999-o5e]

this is totally irrelevant but Chelsea looks exactly like elastigirl from the incredibles lol

[@jalabi99]

OMG I can't un-see it now LOL

[@Samantha2209]

Zeynep holy cow 🤯

[@MsRavenousWolf]

She would totally win the costume contest!

[@hazeldecker622]

Cannot. Unsee.

[@thefinancialdiet]

What they both actually have in common ? Not all heroes wear capes !

[@silvermoonshineX3]

i love how Kati basically likes every question. And she answers every single one in great detail, great interview

[@duckynickel1]

The Rich Friends things hit home for me right now. My husband and i are doing just fine, but many of our friends "seem" to be doing much better, some younger some a bit older. We downsized in our 50's, bought a cute small ranch and are fixing it up in cash. No mortgage. In another year or so, it'll be completely finished. Very grateful, but at times we see these friends going on big vacations, their businesses are booming, they are buying flashy cars. Most of the time we are just fine but when you see this or we get invited to go places that are just out of range right now, we start to feel inadequate when in reality we're doing great. I'm very proud of ourselves and what we've accomplished. These friends are proud of us as well and do not make us feel this way and I'm glad they occasionally invite us. We do go out to dinner or NYC occasionally or other small trips which is in our budget so I focus on that. We also have an online business that is doing well along with my regular full-time job that has health benefits, but sometimes we compare to one of our friend's online business that is super huge and making a lot more money than us. It boils down to Not comparing to others. Very hard at times. We need to be grateful for what we have and not for what we don't have.

[@alexandrac591]

I hear you on this. I remind myself that a lot of that flash and abundance may be made possible by credit cards.

[@AllTheArtsy]

I was a Political Science major in university, and made most of my closest friends there, before I shifted to Art History 2 years later. So now my closest friends are either lawyers, aides to politicians or Masters in International Studies. I know I make the least money in our friend group. Sometimes I feel kinda like my problems, my career, just how my days are going, are very basic compared to theirs. They're solving difficult problems. They're travelling. They're busier. And sometimes I feel like they're more adult, flat out. But I always reel that in, knowing I don't do the same work. I didn't go to law school or post-grad. I didn't put the work in. But I have my own thing. I'm making my own money, paying my bills. I'm saving what I can. I love them, they're my closest friends, they never make me feel less, or stupider. It's just me projecting my insecurity against my "could have been."

[@thefinancialdiet]

Like Kati said in the video " Comparison is the thief of happiness". Reminders like can give us insight on who we are and what is necessary for our own growth.

[@cannotgetstarted]

Having more letters next to your name or a higher salary doesn't mean they're using their money wisely. There is also a tremendous amount of debt, risk, and wasted years earning/saving that come with advanced degrees. You're just as valuable a person as they are. Sure you know this, but wanted to emphasize this for anyone reading.

[@sunrise2day462]

"Comparison is a thief of time." Well said!!!

[@shannon2748]

We all struggle with this sometimes. I was struggling last week with comparison. I always try to shake it off asap, and be grateful for what I do have. It's hard not to be jealous of someone I know who has just spent his life bumming off of people and now he has a retired friend he bums trips off of. He is in his 40s and has never really had to work in his adult life.

[@bridgethealey7188]

I have a friend who’s parents work for the government and they make like 6 figures a year. I stayed with them for the summer and it was so intimidating financially to be around them at times because they did things like going to the theatre or shopping at Whole Foods several days a week. But the whole family was totally aware that they were above me financially and did everything they could to make sure that I was comfortable financially.

[@gentlebutch]

I grew up with a Dad that was very violent so I appreciated the comment. People that don't know people like that don't understand what was meant but I do. Like I said on the other video 2 of my fave KZbinrs in 1 video. I'm glad you said what you said Kati it was true but the truth hurts sometimes. Great video as usual.

[@joeyl695]

Speaking to the financial cost of therapy: there is also the loss of opportunities. You may have difficulty qualifying for life insurance, long term care insurance, etc. Or just increased cost of insurance. May also affect your medical care when your medical doctors give less weight to your reports of health symptoms.

[@kiterafrey]

It can keep you from getting hired too. Legally they can’t say that, but I’ve seen jobs like Walmart fire people for being “unreliable” for having to request time off for doctors - same with physical health issues like my husbands diabetes.

[@missdionysius4675]

Top 10 anime crossovers of all time

[@ardapelle]

I’ve been watching Kati for most of those 8 years, awesome to see her on here!!

[@Samantha2209]

What the heck is happening!!! Kati + Chelsea = 😍😍😍 it’s like christmas in November!

[@nickihammond3939]

No amount of love or caring will make someone get better, or sober. It can help, but it (the desire to get help) has to come from them.

[@helpmetosleep]

Def. Check out the Seven C's for COAs

[@elliejackson8706]

Can’t wait to watch the emotional spending video - this will help me a lot loved this video x

[@MsRavenousWolf]

Not that this comment has anything to do with Kati but my biggest concern is being able to afford a psychiatrist when you make less than 10k a year. Here where I live in VA we have a free clinic and a free dental clinic where when you are new you pay $30 to sign up and go through the usual income paperwork and then it's $10 per visit which to me is reasonable but we don't have a program like that for cheap and affordable mental health clinic.

[@MzShonuff123]

MsRavenousWolf this totally ties in with the conversation about mental health expenses that aren’t medication. A lot of folks can’t have access to mental health assistance not only because they don’t have financial means but because they live in an area where it’s not available. The White House has also cut a lot of programs that make these things available in rural areas (so-called “flyover country”). You make an important point

[@danceonyourtoes]

@@MzShonuff123 That's why we need single payer healthcare!!! Bernie's M4A plan includes comprehensive mental health.

[@askat2016]

I relate to this so much. My insurance will cover the cheapest providers and most of them have not worked for me. I am lucky to be in college and have a school provided counselor who is pretty good. Most of the people in my insurance network either wanted me on x medication (which I tried about 3 different ones) after one trip or was convinced I wasn't sick enough to need help. It took a trip to the in-patient hospital to get on medications that worked and even after I was done with that I didn't have a regular phycologist and back-peddled quite a bit. It is incredibly hard to get adequate help without having very good insurance or a lot of money.

[@larag1764]

One of your best videos. Thanks for increasing awareness of mental health and breaking down the stigma. Best wishes from Australia xx

[@heatherbastian1579]

My two favorite people 😩❤ so excited to see this collab!

[@HiLoGuurl]

I love Kati! Happy to see you guys collaborate 😀

[@mirandaosmelak480]

I love Katie and I love the Financial Diet (read Chelsea in this case). What a treat! Is she coming to the financial podcast as well:)?

[@xtxpxhx]

The Jake Paul series help me realize my mom was a narcissist, that was unexpected but has changed my life completely

[@camelopardalis84]

I recommend you check out "daughtersofnarcissisticmothers.org" and/or "narzissmus.org" if you know German. Ignore the "tapping" ads on the site.

[@suides4810]

Oh my god Please dont take advise from her kzbin.info/www/bejne/o2bUdZ6qhrahebc

[@xtxpxhx]

@@suides4810 what do you mean ?

[@FarraArifin]

Literally my two favorite person ever!

[@julianagc1989]

I Love both of you, great Colab!! This was a very interesting conversation 😊

[@sophiarodriguez3706]

This is one of my favorite TFD videos, and that’s saying a lot. Great discussion!

[@hugskissesxoxoashley9925]

I love this video with Kati! Can’t wait to see her next video with you! 100% agree about when people call blowing money they don’t have as “self care” and justify it over and over. :(

[@OurPerez]

This video is BEYOND timely! Thank u from the bottom of my heart😘

[@Micknbuggie28]

I loved this!! More!

[@remissao13]

You guys nailed it by bringing Kati. Hooray!

[@Kayyy8585]

Nilbberth Silva yep I agree. She’s great 👍🏼

[@suides4810]

she is such a crook

[@Kayyy8585]

Sui Des Why do you believe Kati is a crook? I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone say anything negative about her before.

[@ketoabigail3306]

I enjoy watching this so much! Please do more videos on mental health regarding finances. :)

[@chelseabunker2391]

Being on the receiving end of antisocial personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder IS icky and awful. It's terrifying to be around people like that when they don't care about their own wellbeing, let alone someone else's.

[@CatloafCreative]

I love it when channels I love independently do a collaboration 😊 this was awesome! I can't wait for the next one 😊😊😊

[@vanessaskin]

I agree with a comment below, TFD is such a great financial channel but I loved this episode in particular. Katie was a huge influence for me to get educated on mental health (Therapy) because I was totally unfamiliar with it and my ego fought me on Therapy being affective or even consideration for me. This video was everything because so many great questions were discussed here & I love that people were open to ask them. Thank you!

[@sophiyagautam6695]

This is the collaboration I never knew I needed.

[@Lillipie81]

Stoked to see Kati on TFD. She is awesome.

[@alexisoviedo100]

Great content as always

[@amynoacid91]

Omg two of my favorite youtubers in one helpful video!! Love this video!

[@Squintillions]

*Comparison is the thief of joy.* Love that.

[@MsTD1995]

Thanks! Amazing video... I loved the fact that you've talked about that we don't need to do things "on time"... it's not a race.

[@Senidhr]

I'm so glad you did this video =)

[@jiLiIsAliveAndSleepy]

Aw I was already following Kati, was surprised to see her here. I definitely feel like I have issues with emotional spending, but that it's gotten a lot better since I've started doing therapy and taking care of the main factors of stress in my life that contributed to it.

[@ZumieZumes]

OMG I love Katie!! Great choice!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@jasmineft7569]

OMG *such an awesome informative video,thanks for bringing kati she is phenomenon*

[@mariagabrielarodriguez1365]

I loved this episode!! Chelsea thank you 🙏🏼 for your content! I found your channel a few months ago and I’m very happy! I’ve been in a really difficult position mentally and financially lately and your videos about everything has been a really good way to cope and I’ve done a lot of changes thanks to them! You really help people!! THANK U AGAIN! you’ve helped me a lot! This was an amazing episode

[@FuriosaTerraToma]

Had me crying half the time. I needed to hear some of that. 💜

[@lesliecarnes8775]

Outstanding video! Loved it all!

[@antonellavisocchi7656]

This was so useful, thank you!

[@filleencore]

OMGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!! Katie!!

[@abskulOfficial]

This is by far the most helpful video on TFD I've ever come across!! Kudos for that. Keep 'em coming... 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@just_be_123]

:D thanks for the great video. Question- how much (%) of my budget should be allocated to things like therapy/ taking care of myself?

[@karinaserna2291]

Thanks!

[@artemisrain]

Loved it! I totally want to see more of these. :) Thanks for such a great collab. Man, Kati really pulls off the color yellow well.

[@zeejosany]

I am so exited to see my favorite “grown up you tubers” 🤩

[@dragonlaydee2]

This is great shedding light on mental health is so important!

[@lucydeboxer2565]

Wonderful Q&A!

[@stevesloan5935]

Great vid! Good questions, Kati was interesting. It's nice to come at the key aspects of our lives from various angles to get a more effective picture, and then strategy for making it the best it can be.

[@kickdropacoin]

Great episode TFD! Also, nice shirt Chelsea - I love that colour on you!

[@laurenoverton8837]

Two of my FAVORITE channels coming together for a collab! YAAASSSSS!!! Thank you both for this! You both inspire me so much each day. XOXO 💜💜💜

[@ZumieZumes]

Lauren Overton SAME!!! Love them both! 💜💜

[@georginadiaz7234]

This was awesome! Not a lot of people think about the lost of wages people with mental illness deal with. The cost of having a mental illness can be immense i have to take off almost two days a month especially when my bipolar is really bad or if the pharmacist or doctor mess up my perceptions. i get so scared ill get really bad and have to go into the hospital again so i stay home in the hopes my anxiety wont get worse and make any manic and depressive feelings worse.

[@whocares566]

I love that you both collaborated!

[@rebeccalindgren9025]

Well I have a new channel to subscribe to. Sounds like good stuff over there. Thanks!

[@iyxon]

Excellent video! Loved it, needed to hear a lot of this

[@smartalexiix]

omg two channels i actually watch!

[@alsa3001]

Wow Kati’s amazing

[@heejs6100]

This is the collab I never knew I needed

[@kabatdraws]

oh my god, this is a crossover I neither expected nor deserve but apparently all I need right now!

[@abigailrose9939]

yay kati!

[@MicheleHerrmann]

This is great. When I was having problems at work and with friends, I turned to buying things to make me feel better. I wish I could have all of the money I spent back.

[@louisevandiepen4129]

Two taboos in one talk! Thanks for being open about this. Especialy how the need of therapy is expensive. Without insurance you're financialy and mentaly down in no time. Don 't be ashamed. It's not your fault. Take care

[@peggyallen326]

i do think that some of the talk about being a 'bad friend' can be pretty harmful. I suffer from very severe chronic mental illnesses, and have ended up with very few friends outside of my family because i wasn't well enough to do anything with them, not even send a text message. Whenever i was having a good day i would try to contact them, see how they were going etc. only to be rebuffed and ignored. Mental illness is an illness. The only reason i wasn't hospitalised was because my mum became my full time carer. Yet if i was that sick with a physical illness, friends would have visited, brought flowers, offered to help out. I feel that I wasn't being a 'bad friend', I was trying to survive, just like any other severely sick person. I am no longer close to many people because lets be honest, they were more interested in partying and shopping than in taking 5 minutes to see if i was still alive. And that's fine, but I don't think I'm necessarily the only one to blame when the relationship stops. The stigma around mental illness is at it's worse when you can't put on a fake face and be 'social', in a world where that is seen as the most important thing.

[@financialstats4982]

Hey Chelsea, is very inspiring to watch how you came from the bottom to the top among other personal finance KZbinrs in my last Bar Race Chart Vid I uploaded and you still are in the top 3! 🎉 Congrats and keep up the great work 💪

[@LiveBash]

This is awesome!

[@Sir.Black.]

Watched 👌

[@maverickmarketing9989]

Interesting!

[@thisishot4yt911]

Love the the quote vids from the top 3...

[@financialstats4982]

@@Sir.Black. I'm glad you liked it ❤️

[@dragonflycn]

Thanks so much for this talk, it was really comforting and helpful

[@TheGenerations1]

The correlation Kati has noticed between restricted eating/spending and then the opposite is interesting.

[@rileyj5491]

How about the exorbitant expense of inpatient and residential treatment for eating disorders In America? A six figure stay in a hospital or private facility is rarely easily feasible for most families and more times than not, insurance is not accepted. How do people overcome that kind of financial burden?

[@1oceandragon]

I realize this might not be the right video to comment on but... can you do or recommend how to deal with collections agencies, how to negotiate and setting up payments etc, etc, etc! Please!

[@vickisigh2674]

aa kati's voice is so soothing....

[@vickisigh2674]

"every straight man and boomers should be in therapy" omg ahaha

[@angierose1076]

Katie, what should I do when a friend is toxic and I no longer want to be friends with them but I care about them? What should I say?

[@AnitaB79]

You can just say bye.

[@MsTD1995]

I had that.. just try to stay away. From texting once a day try to reduce the amount of times you're speaking to her and gradually it will slow down . Don't cut it ai quiqe... if she's really hurting you day by day then you should be much more assertive .... good luck and remember we have all been there and probably get there again in our life ..

[@The_Sloth_Guy]

I literally found her channel 2 days ago wth

[@MsTD1995]

I'm an addict Haha. She's the best part of the channel. She makes everything so put together

[@flufftronable]

Chelsea asking”Do you like being a therapist” was such a nice question

[@christineturley132]

Love you guys always! From Ireland and makes me laugh everytime yous mention IRA so casually, double meaning 😂

[@worldofmehak]

Great to see two of my faves in one frame 🤩♥️

[@verypersonalsoli]

Hi Chelsea, love your videos and find them very useful. I have a very specific question for you and am not sure if there is another place to post it so here it goes. I am not a US citizen or residnet, I'm from another country but I work for a Michigan based software company. I would like to start a retirement fund, 401 K or similar in the US so I can save for my future. Is there a way to do this? My boss is willing to help out but is lost as to whether we can open such an account with my being a foreing citizen. Would love to hear your thoughts on this. Thank you!

[@RoxiTube1]

I already follow Katie 🤩

[@EllysaE]

People do not realize what professional people give up to go to school. It’s not easy ... my days spent crying in the library were difficult and I got the “reward” at the end. Oh and when you graduate you go on to take on stifling responsibility that also makes you want to cry everyday so ... the grass is not always greener!

[@leejay2418]

This is lovely but a little surreal that they are together. :)

[@asadb1990]

i don't know why but i always run into young previlaged adults at work who want to go out to eat almost every day of the week. and when they do go out they want to go out to fancy places that are often way too expensive. and if you turn it down people don't offer. where did grabbing a pizza or fried chicken go?

[@evangeliamintzai6302]

Baby boomers should definitely go to therapy. Most of them had abusive parents with ptsd from the war. Maybe they don't want to deal with the emotional pain they have experienced in life.

[@evangeliamintzai6302]

@@pronoydutta614 judging from my mother in law whose father fought in the war I can tell you some. She didn't receive any love from her parents, she was beaten a lot so lots of domestic violence, she wasn't allowed to have a loving relationship with her siblings. She has very low self esteem, she never expresses what she thinks, she feels jugded and criticised all the time, she is codependent and the list goes on and on. Her siblings don't talk to each other anymore and some have moved to other countries with no contact left behind. All those things because their parents weren't equipped to be loving ones and they had to deal with the trauma of the war.

[@heidiwilliams9795]

$24 for a salad is in most restaurants in Australia!

[@editaquadidi]

I love your "pass me to your supervisor" haircut

[@kiterafrey]

I firmly believe every human who fiscally can should go to therapy. We all need love, support, honest tough love, guidance, and help dealing with our emotions and choices. The more bigoted, the more you need it. The more you were not allowed to express your emotional needs, the more you need it. Thus the Boomer comment, they didn’t get to voice it so it built up into worse issues. You need to take care of yourself and your mental clarity and therapy provides you the tools to do that. They don’t fix your issues, they teach you tools so you can fix your issues yourself the way that’s best for you.

[@Shanizshehreen]

Chelsea looks like Erin from The Office!!!

[@jennydow]

Shaming someone for not having a 401K by 30 on a video about mental health and the negative financial repercussion of having mental health issues. That’s not cool. I have two significant mental health disorders that I can only manage with medication since I can’t afford a $25 co-pay to see a mental health clinician. I’m 39, contributing to a 401K is kinda difficult when you suffer from suicidal ideation because you’re on the brink of financial disaster.

[@aelurine]

Same 😬 they need to say exceptions or atleast say they're being sarcastic 😬 but you're doing your best (and even if you're not) you're doing a good job.

[@laurenconrad1799]

Yay! Kati Morton is the best!

[@suides4810]

Lauren Conrad she is a pseudo psychologist

[@laurenconrad1799]

Sui Des I wouldn’t call her a psuedopsychologist considering the number of times she’s read directly from the DSM in her videos. She’s not getting information from some hippie website.

[@-natmac]

Chelsea is that your 6’4 husband in the picture behind you? Lol

[@paigieodo]

Something I'd like to see you guys discuss in the future: how do you cope with guilt around how much money you make? I don't mean in the sense that I make a lot of money, in fact, I live in poverty. But because I've lived in poverty my whole life, I've had a lot of resentment towards people who held wealth (landlords, my friends who came from wealthy families, just rich people in general). I am very anxious about my future prospective income, because I feel like making money, even if it's only a somewhat comfortable amount, holds an inherent evil. I've built up a massive belief system about money and how having it puts you in a position where you are harming others. Now, I'm worried that it's going to lead me to sabotage my future financial health. How do I become comfortable with the idea of being not poor after it's been all I've ever known and has influenced so much of who I am?

[@be6715]

As a 'Boomer', I found the Boomer comment very insulting. WTH, Chelsea?? I thought you were above that kind of comment.

[@-natmac]

B E which one? When she said they should all be in therapy? Because there’s nothing insulting about being in therapy, unless YOU are looking down on people who need help.

[@be6715]

@@-natmac Yes, that was the comment where Chelsea made a gross generalization of boomers. She previously made a video about how Millenniums weren't as they have been portrayed to be. Seems to me that if one shouldn't lump a category of people one way, it isn't right for another group to be lumped either. It isn't a slam on therapy, it is a call out about lumping an entire group a certain way.

[@amethystrocks6433]

I agree. It was a cheap shot.

[@willardSpirit]

"Every boomer needs to go to therapy." #okboomer

[@shannon2748]

And probably every Gen X'er and Millenial, too. Generation Z is going to need it, too.

[@janedonahue1644]

This is over generalizing. Seems to be inconsistent messaging and a little disappointing to hear from this channel

[@kiterafrey]

I feel every human should go to therapy, period. We all need help, support, inspiration, and tough love.

[@amethystrocks6433]

I have really been enjoying Chelsea's presentations. Despite the fact that she's several decades younger than me, she seems wise and down to earth. I have had a lot of respect for her. I have to say, though, that the boomers comment was out of character and rather offensive. I'm a boomer, I've had a lot of issues in my life, and I've seen therapists on & off since I was 20. I don't appreciate being made fun of just because of the year I was born in. I defend younger people when they are put down by others. I'd appreciate the same respect. Please, Chelsea, be respectful of people. It's a much better look. Thanks for reading this.

[@ivapopa1217]

👍🙏

[@nickilewis4262]

Hi Chelsea, I really love TFD, but I was disappointed to hear you say, even in jest 'Every Boomer should be in therapy, every straight man, especially every Boomer man.' I have never heard you be disrespectful of others before and was sorry to hear you be so today. Yes, there are definitely all sorts of people who would benefit from seeing a therapist, but to suggest that all those of a certain generation, or sexuality need therapy so that they fit into your mind set is as silly and ignorant as the people who say 'All Millennials are lazy and should stop eating avocado toast so they can afford a house.' Neither is true and neither is helpful.

[@littlemissrandom9923]

ok boomer