It's Not Clickbait, These Realizations MASSIVELY Changed my Shopping Habits

[@lamureon]

it's interesting to me, when I HAVE to buy something like pants it's suddenly not fun anymore. shows me that it's not about buying stuff, but more about emotional regulation

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Right? When it actually MATTERS and you know you're using the pants for utilitarian purposes and want them to look good + do the job, it's not actually fun even if the "motions" are the same! Thank you for bringing this up!

[@arus_balasanian]

You know what's crazy? Im listening to Alexa and I think "wow she's so deep, knowledgeable and considerate. How could such a smart girl fall in the trap of overconsumption"? And I think the same about myself and yet, here we all are ladies. Everyone's smart but right now I'm looking at my wish list on ebay and depop and I'm a little ashamed. I'm glad Alexa started this channel and provides such interesting fresh points. Also she has that calm charisma (not to be confused with being meh and blah. Yes, Useless and Christina Mychas, I'm looking at you). Thank you Alexa and good luck to all of us!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Exactly! Not that I'm deep, knowledgeable and considerate necessarily (but thank you 🥹) but that we are all smarter than the trap of "being influenced" - it's time to get to the bottom of why this does still happen to us! It's a personal journey that we can take together 😄

[@bthomson]

If Alexa ever wonders why she started this channel we hope that she remembers all the people she is effecting to better their relationship to shopping! A worthy goal!

[@jochenkraus7016]

"How could such a smart girl fall in the trap of overconsumption"?" To some extent it's you against a multi billion dollar industry that knows very well how our brains work. "...here we all are ladies..." Well, I'm not but I can tell you first hand that men aren't much better. (Warning, stereotypes ahead) You have makeup, shoes and luxury handbags, we have N+1 as optimal number of bicycles, luxury watches, sneakers and did you see the model railroads and sim racing setups that some of us have?

[@xariexis]

@arus_balasanian I love everything about this comment. EVERYTHING.

[@xiaozhou4416]

I found digitizing my closet (there're a lot of apps out there nowadays, even with AI to help you create different outfits that are fun to try) helped a lot with cutting down my shopping urges - everything from seeing how much I have to realizing the almost infinite number of outfits I can already create with different permutations of clothes ( it helped me realize even if you only have few items you can create a lot of different outfits by exercising your creativity). I guess it made me realize having more clothes won't even make me more fashionable - it's what you can do with what you have that's more fun/challenging anyway!

[@annaisapalindrome]

Agree! I’m using an app and even have a few things cataloged in my wishlist but tbh I don’t even really look at those items when I’m so excited about what I already have!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Absolutely, 100% agree with your last line there, it's doing what you can with what you have that is the FUN and creative part that actually fulfills the "love of fashion" in our brain - not shopping! So much of the "style influence" we see is focused on "stuff and shopping" these days!

[@deborahcurtis1385]

I've found that buying a new belt or two has completely altered my usable wardrobe and made it much easier to style and wear existing items.

[@mollycolman1092]

When I see something online that tempts me to buy, I immediately go read the one and two star reviews about that item. I then usually realize that it isn't really something I want or need, and is just low quality stuff that i can pass on buying.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! I think I mentioned this wayyyy back - I read some negative reviews of the owala water bottle I was tempted by and "gave myself the ick" about buying it, as the kids say 🙃

[@jochenkraus7016]

My problem with the really bad reviews is that they are often a warranty claim, bad experience with the vendor or people should have bought a different product. And the more balanced ones with three or four stars are often actually useful and therefore no help for the purpose you describe :-D

[@fnma21]

I do exactly the same 😅

[@ginafuller1654]

I had to pause the video because #2 really struck me. Thinking about how influencing has created a false demand for items and also encourages personal disatisfaction - I’ve known this, but the way you spoke about the tactics of these videos really hit me in a new way. Thanks for creating these very insightful and helpful videos; I am enjoying the journey with you

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Thank you! And likewise I am enjoying the journey with YOU! 😁

[@deborahcurtis1385]

Most of the time they get free items, or discounts, or they can use tax breaks to neutralise losses and even hold live sales to get optimal returns for items they no longer want! This last bit is the final insult really, because the rest of us do not have the following, which they are using. We sell things on eBay with associated risks, or sell via an intermediary who takes huge percentages, up to 40%. There is an addictive element to the fake friends thing, it's a para social relationship and as such, followers have their noses pressed to the glass, you are not really friends at all, but it's a facsimile of one. This is a whole other field for discussion. I think it really solidified during the lockdowns, and now with inflation people are increasingly house bound and addicted to the electronic world.

[@Enchanteralle]

What I also notice when I get into the habit of buying and shopping regularly is that I don't realize what I actually have in my closet. I might have similar items and I really just need one. Then I get overwhelmed when my closet gets full. This past year, I've narrowed down my wardrobe significantly. Cleaning my closet taught me so much about my shopping habits. When I own less, it's easier for me to remember what I need, what I already own, and then it reduces the urge to shop because I realize what I need and don't need. This year I notice that it's doable not to shop for clothes for 4-5 months straight and when I do, I specifically look for what I need. When I finally shop for something specific after a few months of no shopping, I realize that I'm not just mindlessly looking for that rush of dopamine from shopping when I used to go out to browse. I actually notice that I get overwhelmed when the stores are full of people and there's stacks and stacks of clothes to go through. I don't browse through those racks anymore. I just aim to find what I am looking for. I'm able to walk out without buying anything and if I do buy anything, it's because I need it. So for anyone wanting to go low buy or no buy, it's definitely doable and gets easier over time! Thanks for sharing!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes - I've also reached the point of overwhelm when "shopping" now - both in store and online, even. I had a "no buy exception" planned from the beginning of the year that I recently shopped for, which I made a video about so I won't share too many spoilers...but even looking for these specific items now felt like a waste of time or something I didn't want to spend more time than necessary doing. And I don't think the actual activity has changed, right - shopping looked the same back when I did much more of it! But my mindset has definitely changed - it just shows that something had gotten mixed up in my mental processes before and this year has really kick-started my interest to find out more about why that happens!

[@AlexHider]

I agree with your first point so strongly. The biggest lesson I also had to learn that seeing something often will induce a desire to have it where no desire existed before. A genuine desire too, you rationalize it! So I had to remove that first part of the cycle - not seeing it.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! It's like that idea of "remember when you wanted what you have now"? And then flipping it a little bit, to "remember when you hadn't even seen this thing that you now want?" 😅

[@Kringeladida]

I would recommend finding something to do instead of shopping. Get a library card and read more. Start a crochet project and do a little bit every day. Plan something for your free time that does not require lots of spending and makes you feel good. I go on a hike/long walk on the weekends and always feel happy and relaxed afterwards. :)

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

For sure!! One of my early videos was "things to focus on instead of shopping" - I have a little guitar cameo in that one haha 🎸

[@gabzz72]

🤯 That insight on the shopping as a hobby is spot on

[@fuchion15]

Really enjoyed this video. I’m at a point at which I’m quite averse to shopping. Instead I’ve begun to really enjoy the things that I own. A surprising side effect is I’m now using the nice things that I previously voided using because I’m no longer a collector. Things are meant to be used, if I don’t use them I don’t need them in my life and if I own them then I should be using them.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yessss this is exactly it! Also sounds like what I'm experiencing too where I used to "know" that the real joy of having something comes from using it, but now I KNOW, and actually do it/live that way.

[@lynerichard5306]

When I was younger I used to cherish the clothes I loved and kept them until they fell apart or didn’t fit me anymore or were really really outdated. My husband at the time was always telling me he was tired of seeing me in the same clothes. I remember I had a beloved sweater that I wore often and that was like new after several years and he kept telling me I should get rid of it. I was like why would I throw away a perfectly good item that I love wearing and that still looked good. He started bringing me on shopping sprees each season and buying me new clothes and I gradually got hooked to the feeling of wearing new clothes and feeling good about it. I also remember working as a receptionist in a consultant firm and employees telling me they were tired of seing me always wearing the same clothes all the time. My budget was limited and I had a few quality pieces I rotated through the week. All that to say that I gradually started buying clothes and loving the feeling of it and having people complimenting me and now as a 66 years old newly retired woman I have so much clothes and keep wanting more and it’s really a hobby and an addiction. I’m trying to get back the mindset I had when I was younger but it’s hard. It goes in cycles. For a while I’m really good and then I get frustrated and go shopping again.

[@ladyzeta6]

I can’t imagine caring or being so rude to say that I’m tired of what a coworker is wearing. Those people were beyond rude to you.

[@JehanineMelmoth]

Your ex-husband and colleagues needed to be decluttered! Such narrow-mindedness is part of the problem. Like you I used to cherish and love the small number of clothes I had. I wish I still did that. I still mend things, and I buy secondhand now, but as long as I’m buying something I don’t need, I’m over-consuming.

[@elisaschneider5738]

I absolutely know what you were living through .. I have the same issues now 🫶

[@marineb9666]

People should stop caring that much about appearance. During covid, there was two full months of lock down where I lived. I spent them alternating between two dresses, and nothing else. They were super confortable, I loved them (and still do, I wear them home as often as I can), I was happy to wear them, and so relieved to just grab the same thing every morning. It was a lot less mental load and I was happy. My mom didn't really care, but my dad also told me he was tired of always seeing me in the same outfits, and he would repeat it everyday. Even years later, when I wear these dresses, he still says the same. Every time I wear something a lot, he says this. But he also blames me for buying new clothes 🤷‍♀️ (except from that, he is great) Also, in my first job, no one cared about what others looked like, it was really nice. But now, in my second job (I'm 25), the respect I get depends on what I am wearing. And so I'm back to owning and wearing more clothes than I would like to. Our relatives and co-workers sometimes actively participate in us overconsuming.

[@financiallysparkling]

You're absolutely right! Emotional spending is a symptom based on something deeper, personally, within us. Understanding what it is can help us form healthier habits when shopping. Then, we can get what we want and what we need without feeling guilty and damaging our personal finances. Lovely video! 😊

[@kaisa1476]

When it comes to shopping for clothes, figuring out my actual personal style has been very helpful. I often used to buy new clothes mostly because I wasn't satisfied with what I had. I got inspired by creators (often crafters) with cool personal styles and I thought I'd like to look like them, but ended up not really wearing the inspired stuff because it didn't feel like me, and then I kept being unsatisfied and shopped for more (in moderate amounts though, but still more than I needed). So figuring out why it didn't feel like me and what actually did and why has helped me to say no to many items. Some things are just not for me even though I admire them on others.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes, 100% yes. This is exactly what I've got lined up for some "style in the era of influence" videos in a couple weeks' time! You've got it figured out - but I'm going to rehash it with my own examples anyway haha

[@flowerywonder2982]

I have a clothes shop, a shoe shop, a make-up shop and a perfume shop in my house. I don't need to shop for these items outside or online for the forseeable future. I am set. That is what I tell myself. I hope I keep listening. 🤗

[@atie3218]

Very helpful video, thank you ❤ In the recent years my shopping habits got out of hand. I have a bit more bags, shoes and makeup than I need. But my biggest category is skincare 😢 For now it helps to write in my notes some short reason for why I don’t need to buy an item. Right now I wrote that I don’t need any more skincare because there will be new better products by the time I use all of what I have. The reasoning needs to be practical and make sense to you personally. So when I’m in the shopping mood I go look at my note and don’t want things anymore. I agree with you about shopping being a hobby, it never was one for me. But with influencers my shopping habits became more and more problematic. It honestly doesn’t even feel like I’m being myself anymore.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

That's a good one! If you buy something now, then it's another thing to use up before you get to try a "new" (hopefully better, if we assume that products are trying to improve) version that may be out there in the future! Thank you!

[@marispilgrim1677]

I am so excited to have found your channel! I’m a violinist too and I just finished school and have been doing auditions. This year was super hard for me with all the rejections, and I turned to shopping to cope with my negative emotions. My consumerism quickly spiraled out of control and I am looking to regain my sense of self. So nice to feel less alone!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

I am likewise so happy to welcome you here, wow that's relatable. I am thinking about how "failure" at one of my biggest life goals, which in my case is also specifically audition rejection, has nudged me towards overconsumerism and will eventually speak about this on here too! Best of luck at any upcoming auditions (I really need to get in gear for some this Sept) - don't give up, unless you want to! 😁

[@bthomson]

I wanted a job at a consignment store so I bought two items and took them in to the interview. I used the items to demonstrate my good taste and selling ability! Didn't get the job but the boss told me she loved that approach!🤷

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

@bthomson haha if only we were allowed to talk and show our character at symphony auditions but alas, we get about 5 minutes of playing our instrument, behind a screen, to show the full extent of our ability and good taste. We don't even get to choose the music we play. They give us a list!

[@marispilgrim1677]

Thank you! We got this! 💪 Both the auditions and the conscious consumption!

[@reinadellasschizas]

As I am getting older, I prefer spending my money on experiences rather than physical things. Also, what works for me not spending my money on the stuff I don’t really need is, after I receive my salary, to leave the least money possible for shopping. I have the priviledge of working from home, going to the office one time a month so I don’t need that much clothes. When I want to buy something to wear I think if I really need it. In most cases, I don’t.

[@craneoflores]

Shopping as a hobby... Yeah I think I have done that lol. You're right that I don't really want it to be one of my hobbies. Appreciate this advice

[@xCopyAndPasteSkilzx]

Since I consume more no buy content now, I am more aware of/find jarring how much I'm being advertised to while scrolling KZbin, even just in thumbnails and video titles. Eg. "Add to cart" "you need this!" I definitely feel more innoculated these days. I'm curious whether I'll continue to feel this way, or whether I need to keep watching more no buy content in order to keep my "antibodies"' high.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes IT'S EVERYWHERE, and even in language creators use: "I'm obsessed with this purchase" etc. - it's a little jarring and disturbing after I've stepped back!

[@bthomson]

"Antibodies!!!". Great image and so apt!!

[@33Jenesis]

I love the mental working while looking at items thinking about how to use them. This is the fun part. Once I own them, I may not implement my plans and let them rut in closet or shelf. I now am more aware of this tendency and really check with reality. This cuts down on buying similar items because I am in love or buying for a fantasy crafter I envision.

[@CindyLocherTheRelaxationWorks]

This was such a timely video for me, thank you. You helped me realize that I do shop as a hobby far too much. It's easy to lie to yourself about that but once you see it, you can't unsee it. I think that alone will go a long way toward changing my attitudes and therefore my behaviors so thank you!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! There's several "once you see it you can't unsee it" moments happening for me this year. What I can't help but wonder is why I wasn't seeing these seemingly obvious things before 🤔

[@emmalawless7934]

Such great points! I have found that #2 is especially effective for me. When I consider the human and environmental costs of most consumer goods, it's much easier for me not to purchase. I'm not perfect -- there are things I consume in small amounts that are not produced as "ethically" as I'd like them to be, and there are things that are produced "ethically" that I sometimes overbuy (looking at you, female-founded slow fashion brands, extra points if they're vegan). I think on a recent Sustain This episode, they had a guest who made the distinction between being a consumer versus a citizen (in the context of labor rights for garment workers, I believe). I loved that point -- helps steer it away from judgment and more toward community.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! Anytime I talk about "moral" decisions it's through the lens of community (I like that too!) and personal integrity, NOT judging others or even feeling guilty personally (or if we do feel guilty not dwelling on that feeling beyond the point that it is helpful for us to do better.) For me though it does help me "try to do my best" to think of it that way.

[@bthomson]

This reminds me why this channel is SO important! The care with which each topic is dissected and examined - never wishing to step on ANY toes!👣

[@SimplyKatieWalks]

Im sure you've seen Shawna's new no buy video. Im doing no buy august with her. Thanks to you, I believe I've set myself up for success. One thing I've learned is that social media changes so quickly that trends pass well before it matters to me anymore. Im old, though.🎉

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Amazing! I'll be here with ideas to support anyone for a no-buy August 😄 And you are so right about trends passing almost too fast to care now. I almost feel like (or I hope?) we're reaching a tipping point where social media consumerism is becoming so ridiculous that no one can take it seriously anymore

[@redyredred6487]

I recently went on a no-buy journey and I’m unburying my house of way too many clothes and shoes that I’ve bought over several years now. This is great advice. Interestingly enough, since I went cold turkey and stopped buying non-essential stuff, I’m actually not feeling tempted to buy stuff that I see. I’m doing a lot of research into why I have been so influenced and in hyper consumption mode, and it’s become very distasteful to me as a result. You talk about this as one of the helpful strategies, and that is working for me. That, and seeing a higher bank account balance is a big incentive to keep going. You have a great channel here, and I subscribed recently as part of my personal research! ❤

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

I have also finally reached the point of not being tempted, 99% of the time anyway. It took a couple of "failures" for me to get here but after the 6 month mark this year, I think it finally clicked into place a bit! Or maybe it's just summer and not going to work/going out as much? Who knows, I'll see whether any impulses come back when I get back to my job...and hopefully along with getting back to work I will also be able to start building the bank balance (I had some dental work kind of decimate my no-buy progress savings this year 🥲) Welcome and please continue to share your own no-buy developments if you feel like it, I love to read these thoughts and stories!

[@JessyLovesDisney]

You hit on SO many great points. 👏🏻 I’m inspired to do a no buy August. If I feel it goes well, I’m going to pursue six months. I want to change my relationship with consumerism. Your content is going to be my buddy while I do this. 😂

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Go for it! I do believe "no buy" is part of creating the environment conducive to making personal change, even if it doesn't go perfectly. Happy to be a source of support or at the very least, an influence-free zone to hang out during August 🤗

[@TheAliceinFinland]

Even if it doesn't go well, you can always try again in September, or even start again in the middle of August 😄

[@pinkfloweredsnake]

I don't have a history of shopping issues ( though of course there's always room for growth and we live in a consumerist culture) but i think consuming content like this while doing tasks such as cleaning is the self inoculation - i think you identified that idea really well, i hasn't thought about it as explicitly before.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Exactly! I think that making sure even my "cleaning/menial taskwork company" videos are "in line with my life goals" is helping me more than imagined it could

[@pinkfloweredsnake]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear haha ya plus it makes me attuned to how having less would make the task at hand (cleaning) easier

[@cindyklempner7203]

Great suggestions that cannot be said often enough. Thank you once again.

[@ziminamaryana]

Thank you for the video. I’d be really happy to watch a video about ecological impact of shopping. I actually used to go shopping to our local small store as a part of my daily walk with the baby. Thankfully, he’s older now and we can change that routine

[@Yolli.Maceda]

I needed it this! I’m not waiting for next year I’ll start now the hardest season! I have so many things! 😢

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

You can do it! 👏 I'll be here to cheer you on

[@user-z5e5h]

One thing that makes me NOT want to buy anything is getting something that I haven’t actually ordered. This happened to me twice this month. The idea of having to contact customer service of each company, tell them what happened and deal with returns / sending / receiving more packages make me regret my purchases. Both things were planned purchases, not bought on impulse.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Oh this happened to me awhile ago and it was painful - I had to re-do the order for the correct item after being sent the wrong one, but then cancelled it, and there was some kind of customer service misunderstanding/things weren't happening, I ended up having to file a chargeback to get a refund for the cancelled (not shipped) re-do order, but this got me banned from shopping ALL of the companies anymore (it was an Urban Outfitters order, which I think got me totally banned online at Anthropologie and Free People as well!) - which is actually a good thing since my goal is to not buy anymore 😅

[@margarytawinkler]

Love the ending! And the rest of the video too, but the not have money part struck a chord 😅 My living situation fairly recently changed from a place where I could just randomly buy a pair of shoes if I really liked them to a place where I have to plan for these types of purchases well in advance. Wow has this been enlightening in showing how hooked I was on the see it - want it - buy it cycle. I would pine for things like they were the love of my life and then some time later when I could afford to buy them, naturally, I would have long stopped thinking about them. I’d be curious to know whether your approach to buying or even thinking about gifts for others has changed as a result of no buy.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

So I'm sure I will be sharing more thoughts on gifts during the holiday season, however, to not leave you hanging - I'm not a huge gifts person in general outside of my immediate family (i.e. kids), and tend to gift consumables (bought or homemade) to people unless I truly know they'll like the thing I have in mind...and/or I'd be okay with them returning the item to me if they DON'T like it. In my adult life I've always been more open about that, and I think a big part of it is that I only really exchange gifts with people, friends, I know well enough to talk like that with!

[@margaroseYT]

I feel blessed for having found your channel today. This video is very helpful to me. Thanks. 💜

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Aw thank you!

[@musingsoflua]

Wow the "shopping as a hobby" argument hit me like a truck😵‍💫🤢 thanks alexa! hahahah

[@JoanMurray-j5y]

I'm addicted to antique shops. If I'd originize my home I could enjoy what I've already purchased.

[@mimmikibilly]

I've become sorta addicted to online shopping, albeit thrifted. It's basically like gambling, even if I put the limit of having to ask for measurements beforehand, sometimes I end up buying the item regardless. After some months that this has gone on, I'm now starting to see that. I'm definitely going to use this video as a tool to plan a strategy. I come from trauma and it's partially linked to appearance, both from childhood and my past relationship, but that doesn't justify my continued spending, as it causes me to feel bad for the money that I spend and the clothes that I end up leaving in the wardrobe.

[@moonsidecafe]

Your channel is keeping me on track 👍

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

🙌

[@nothingelsematters0529]

Congrats for 6k! :D I just saw it now. :)

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Thank you - it's pretty crazy 🫨

[@JehanineMelmoth]

Your analysis of shopping as a hobby is exactly right. I’ve made progress, but I still have some of the journey left. A point re Internet auctions (I know you didn’t mention them, but this is a point that I keep wishing someone would make): like many people, I’ve felt a buzz from winning an eBay auction and getting a thing. It was only recently that a lightbulb went off: what about the person who lost the auction? Maybe they really needed this, and saved up for it. Or maybe they’re exactly like me, and don’t need it but want it. Why not let them have the thing? Am I so selfish that I want to feel a temporary high at the expense of other people? This helped me to give up eBay unless I’m buying something I need.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! I haven't purchased from one in awhile but that's kind of what I meant when I said in another video that buying something secondhand means someone else couldn't buy it - and if I don't truly need it it's maybe the better option to leave it for someone else or in this case, whoever else is bidding on the auction! Let them have the excitement and buzz, I'll take the buzz of NOT spending $ or adding another item to my home these days 🙂

[@JehanineMelmoth]

Oh, and did you find treasure when you were decluttering? I keep finding nice pieces that I’d forgotten I had. And basics - I will not need a new T-shirt for years! I found a load of tops recently - if only I could have cancelled the order for one that was in its way! Currently I’m shopping in my big bags of clothes and my wardrobes.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Well I don't know that I found anything I forgot I had, but I did realize how many of certain types of items I had in a more realistic way, when reorganizing and struggling to figure out how to keep things like t-shirts and socks easy to put away 🙃

[@saramm3765]

Sadly many fair trade and eco friendly clothing companies don't make items to fit someone like me at 4'11" so I've been trying to focus on buying a smaller wardrobe, making it last, and not falling prey to a fantasy self but what I actually truly need and wear every day.

[@arinamoves]

shopping is an easy escape , especially second hand (for me). I try to look for artists who make pottery , or garments and buy directly from them or small sustainable brands. It is in general more expensive, so one has to think more and maybe even save up. It is less accessible and becomes more special so I do it less often for all the above reasons. I think it is still important to support creative designers and makers, if they make something you need or love.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! We are currently kind of on "gentle lookout" for local pottery artists...what with kids and all, we have a dwindling collection of ceramic plates (and actually the adults have been responsible for more chipped bowls etc 😅) and the plan is when we really reach the point of needing to replace, we will try and find something beautiful, handcrafted and support an artist!

[@arinamoves]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear that’s a beautiful idea! Hope you find some inspiring artists

[@ninimacs2244]

hi, i can recommend the book 'the story of stuff', it greatly helps me with not wanting to buy stuff, because it brings to the forefront all these problems that come with consuming too much stuff and explains the process of producing stuff :) makes you not only think of yourself and your wants, but what your demand means for other people all over the planet

[@ninimacs2244]

i can also recommend sagajohanna on youtube, she makes great videos about not consuming and minimalist content that is not reliable on buying anything :D

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Thank you! I have this book and agree, it's a great resource to find out these reasons to not overconsume.

[@loriroemer1122]

I've gotten rid of all of the channels that entice me to buy. I have also gotten rid of "travel for a year in just a carryon" videos. I used to do that but now I am dealing with some chronic illnesses, and there are things I need to travel with for my safely and health. I have to , gasp, check a bag!! I felt like I was losing the game somehow by doing that. so good bye most travel channels. I do carry on the most important things for my comfort and health, but everything else gets checked. Also many sponsored vids by luggage companies.

[@ginafuller1654]

I have watched a lot if these too and they often leave me feeling like my current set-up needs upgrading. Lighter bags, smaller power banks, not to mention allll of the merino wool clothes. It’s better to just figure out how to work with what you have and save the money for traveling!

[@loriroemer1122]

@@ginafuller1654 Oh my the merino wool!!

[@SimplyKatieWalks]

Right!?! I was feeling guilty for not packing personal item only! Not everyone wants to be a minimalist!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Honestly I feel like it's what you said at the end there - a lot of the "packing" videos are a way to show sponsored products under the guise of "useful tips" for a specific occasion (i.e. travel) - not just luggage but also little gadgets to make things more streamlined or easier or, yes, the merino wool or otherwise "optimized" fabrics 😅...I'm spoiling one of this coming week's video points but lots of times "upgrading" is just a code word for "new" thing to buy!

[@alcnwonderlnd]

Out of these strategies, I’m best at talking myself out of things. I’m one of those people who is chronically online 😂 so I am seeing so many products on a daily basis but I have my reasons for things I don’t buy and I (usually) do a good job about complying with my “rules.” I also like to hang out at the mall and will go window shopping as my exercise (it’s too hot to walk outside) but I definitely have to watch myself to avoid any impulse purchases. I do have a budget and so in a sense I do take away the money and put that money towards other financial goals such as emergency savings or paying down debt, that I think has helped me the most. If I ever really want something then I can usually wait until next month when my budget resets! At least I’m doing my best 😅 Also, I have a pretty good idea of the amount I need for miscellaneous spending and so far the amount has been working for me. Even though I allow myself some fun spending, I do still talk myself out of things all the time!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

If you've got the energy and willpower to talk yourself out of things, great! 💪More power to you and at the end of the day, the best we can do IS to "do our best" 😁

[@meb3369]

Excellent reflections. I definitely need to deal with point No. 1. Since getting on instagram, I keep buying stuff i don't need!! It is so frustrating. Ugh.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Ooh thank you for this comment - it reinforces my idea that any "advice" online is inevitably going to be incomplete, a bit surface level, or "easier said than done." I'm also working on decreasing my "phone time" in general (as well as the idea of this video, limiting places you "see" stuff to want) and I WILL come back with more ideas to explore regarding limiting exposure that may help you deal with it in a more constructive way. (They may also NOT help you, since any change takes a lot of personal motivation...but hey - I'll be sharing anyway! Haha)

[@meb3369]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear Looking forward to it!!

[@cjack-caldeira3363]

So insightful. Thank you for sharing your learnings

[@bthomson]

She is an eager student who generously passes on her findings.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

What better way to reinforce one's learnings (or even find out that perhaps things are not as I first thought) than to share out loud? 😉

[@Maillesmaillesmailles]

Oh consumerism also got into crafting : you must see "stash tour" videos where people have as much skeins as a proper yarn store 😨 Really it would take a full decade to knit all this stash ! I feel it is "shopping fantasy" at its peak, bc it is part of the creative process to envision what you can do with this fiber, to find or design the perfect project, etc. and it is super enjoyable ! But it takes 100 x longer to actually knit it and our human mind is faster than our head : we are already planning the upcoming projects before finishing the (multiple) current ones ! So we end up buying and buying supplies...

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

I think that kind of "stash" would stress me out, because the stuff would constantly be tantalizing me with what I could make with it and the mental to-do list would be so long and heavy after awhile. Basically exactly what you said!

[@jurukiki]

5:28 i used to think i should get an item because of how i havent seen an item like that before and i should buy it before it sells out or ill regret it, but 95% of the time theres something similar enough and i dont need to rush. Granted this makes me spend too much time researching which is a separate problem...

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

I wonder if the "research" can somehow be put on a "to-do" list where you then forget about it, like how some people use wishlists. I currently do not keep a physical wishlist anywhere as you may know, but if you tell your brain "hey I'll research that LATER" with the idea that if it's truly important to you, you will remember, don't stress about forgetting... and then go do something else, maybe you'll organically forget at least some of the time? Let me know if you try it haha

[@luluandmeow]

The ladies who do the Sustain Podcast are all into reusing, restyling, reloving and low-buying so check them out

[@tateshevchenko6584]

I do not buy on black fridays after I watched "the Cost of Fashion" 3 years ago.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Just looked this up - it's coming up for me as "The True Cost" documentary - if this is the same one, I also watched that and was pretty horrified at how the industry works. Maybe it's a good idea to rewatch that before the "sale season" this year....

[@tateshevchenko6584]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear yes, "The True Cost"

[@zcapari]

if I don't see it, I don't like it, I don't want it, I don't buy it

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

You got it 🫡

[@HeatherFonseca]

Back in the day, if I didn't have the money to shop, I just wouldn't go to the store! Now that I can buy on my phone my old strategy isn't nearly as effective.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! The smartphone has really become a "shopping tool"...and I'm not a fan 🫠

[@cynthiahunter6588]

I appreciate the recap at the end

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Me too haha 😆 it helps me gather together what I've said and tried to convey, especially if I've somehow gotten into the weeds along the way

[@bthomson]

Beautiful weeds!🌾💐

[@nickylapiel2675]

Ugh, the first thing i thought about as I opened the video is that sweater is gorgeous and where can I buy that? 😂

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Haha sorry, no links in the description 😆 (it's an old sezane cotton top though in case you seriously did want the info, not trying to gatekeep)

[@lindacurtis7267]

I’m watching you and nodding my head in agreement.

[@DuchessOfWales]

Yes indeed - consider plastic in packaging of all the crap we are buying / shipping...

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes! So much disposable plastic and packaging for a temporary journey 😕

[@SimplyBeautiful516]

My moral dilemma around shopping is that nagging knowledge that if everyone stops buying ( and I am not advocating shopping for capitalist greed) then what happens to the poor who at least were making more money than if they didn’t have the under-payed job. I’m not trying to sound ignorant of the problem of the poor in these countries, but I don’t believe that NO wage is better than an extremely low wage. But, I don’t know how to fix this issue.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Yes it really is a kind of tumultuous situation...it feels like there has to be a better way, but it's really hard to find it! After reading your comment I actually did a cursory google search on "how to support garment workers in the global south" and one article did suggest that "voting with our dollar" by buying from these companies signals that the demand is there and continues the practices...BUT like you, I do wonder whether no wage at all (i.e. shutting down the factory with no alternate employment) is really better than the current situation. I'll be trying to look into this more!

[@luckyluna62]

For me it’s paying to turn off the ads on here and streaming sites, and then not declutterring lol, and getting into reading keeps me away from ads and entertained but no buying physical books because I never read the book# I actually own 😂

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Haha reading the books I actually own is on my to-do list but it takes a LONG time to get around to it!

[@Iquey]

I'll admit that I like going out and existing in public stylishly.. but you don't necessarily have to go shopping to do that. I think this is where the "hot girl walk" concept came from. Go out and walk and look cute for fun and get a bit of exercise, but you don't have to go buy anything.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Ah I never considered it that way - I like that! I thought it was a way to motivate oneself to get out for a walk or exercise, by viewing yourself as a "hot girl", and "hot girls are walking now". I guess both can be good ideas 😁

[@alyssabrundage4360]

Consumed by Aja Barber, The Story of Stuff, and the documentary “The True Cost” all helped me with understanding the ethical implications of shopping!

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Thank you for commenting these! Yes! I actually thrifted all of these books a couple of years ago, read and enjoyed them, and plan to re-read them soon 😁

[@eva_teja]

I think this is so true. But it doesn’t help me that you have your Polène bags stacked behind you. Makes me want to look at their website. 😬🙈 it’s so much about discipline.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Oh no! Haha maybe I should rearrange things so it's just the cardboard boxes 😅 the thing is, those shelves/bags are my legitimate bedroom decor, not a "video background"! But I'm definitely not trying to become a Polene "influencer". Hmmm...

[@eva_teja]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear that would probably help 😅🙏🏼

[@CAGChannel1]

Nooooooooo, one of the things I love about your channel is the “non- preachiness. “ Us older,people who were told in school that if we didn’t turn the lights off if we left a room, electricity would run out. I remember being seven and terrified to turn on light switches for a while. Please don’t go down that road. There are plenty, plenty of channels that do that.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Is this referring to shopping as a moral decision? If so, I regret to inform that I will take a brief foray down this road soon in a planned future video 😅 (feel free to skip that one! the title will make it very clear) but mainly because it can be a helpful framework or a tool to look at an impulse differently. I appreciate this feedback though because I'm conflicted as to how much one "should" live their life this way - definitely don't want to create any light-switch situations here and I'm definitely not an "all or nothing" person, I think there's always some level of nuance to things.

[@bthomson]

My favorite shirt!

[@bthomson]

Just saying!😏

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Haha good to know, I'm a little hot and cold on the horizontal stripes but I haven't been able to part with it so I'll take this as a sign to hang onto it with confidence 😊

[@bthomson]

A tall person can rock horizontals!

[@bthomson]

Since I don't shop I am using the "no" as a tool not to eat snacks! It is sort of working? 😏 🍟🍩🍦🍿

[@bthomson]

Saving money is truly a worthwhile side benefit to all of this! A healthy emergency fund is a must have ( especially with a family!)

[@xCopyAndPasteSkilzx]

Can you make a video on the "underconsumption core" trend on shorts/tiktok?

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

I certainly could - but, I'm actually not on tiktok right now, and avoid shorts these days, so I've only learned about this trend through other creators' videos on it! And I also have about 3-4 weeks of videos planned already (yeah it's a bit crazy over here) so by the time I get to it, the "trend" may even be over. But that might actually add an interesting perspective in talking about it. So - maybe I will - it remains to be seen 👀 Sorry if that's frustrating and sorry that if I do talk about it, it won't be soon 😅

[@xCopyAndPasteSkilzx]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear I also don't have a TikTok account and have only learned about it through long-form vids from other low buy KZbin channels! I'll be curious to hear your take if/when you decide to post about it.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

@xCopyAndPasteSkilzx thank you! And I do appreciate the request. I have actually noticed that even the smaller channels that did videos reacting to underconsumption have gotten over a hundred thousand views on their videos 👀, I guess that's what trending topics can do! Maybe after all the no-buy thoughts are out of my system I'll be quicker to jump onto the trend reactions (and maybe by then I'll be prepared for that kind of attention, if that were to happen to me haha 😳)

[@imo88-lh3kp]

Which app do you use ?

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Sorry I'm not sure I understand/the answer could be different depending on what you're referring to - which app do I use for what?

[@bthomson]

One vote for an underpinnings video! 🤔👁‍🗨

[@bthomson]

Another vote for the moral and human rights dilemmas!

[@hadasitalki7247]

❤

[@natara2811]

Apart from the content, I like your voice 😁

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Thank you!

[@LotusesGalaxyOcean]

Please look into how ethical consumption is a status symbol more than most luxury is. Luxury beliefs.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

Ever since I saw your comment I've been thinking about this idea, thank you so much for this thought. I do see how "luxury beliefs" are legitimate! And at a certain "status" we have the time and level of privilege, wealth, to participate in ethical consumption...and do it by way of "avoiding" the unethical brands in buying decisions. I do think that the very poor or most of the "global south" are also often participating in ethical consumption, because they cannot afford to overconsume. While they may not avoid unethical brands since they might have to buy their necessities from whatever is accessible, they are participating in ethical consumption by not consuming excess. But I can still see how this is very different - living like this because of a lack of privilege - than having the beliefs because one DOES have the privilege. I'm still thinking about this and maybe will chat about it on camera in the future!

[@LotusesGalaxyOcean]

@@Alexas.nobuyyear I think this is an important topic as well. I personally think that some of the best investments into making fashion more ethical are via decentralization. I see no point trying to make large brands change their ethics. There are more effective options to create change. If a machine to automate cutting and sewing or weaving or knitting was in the 200-1,000 dollar price range we would easily organically grow more indie clothing brands because the production would be more accessible. If we extend that concept to every aspect of production and fashion it becomes far easier to ethically keep costs low, pay people well and get quality products. Essentially what 3d printers did but for everything. I wish people would put money toward that…. more than anything else because it is a solution for everyone.

[@KadeBronson]

Great video but I don't have time to watch the whole thing because I have to go to Shein.

[@Alexas.nobuyyear]

cool, maybe you can practice NOT BUYING ANYTHING while you're there 😉

[@crystalassam433]

I never considered shopping as a hobby 💡