Its not 'HOW YOU ARE' its 'HOW YOU ARE BEING'

When we speak about our negative tendencies in a concrete manner, we solidify that we DONT WANT TO CHANGE, or that we truly believe that a mode of operation is PERMANENT.
We grow and change throughout the entirey of our lives, so looking at our short comings and pretending that they are immutable, or unchangeable is extremely DISEMPOWERING.
It's also NOT true. There are things we can't change, and YES we have TENDENCIES, but what we need to realize is that we habitually reinforce and solidify those tendencies by IDENTIFYING with them, instead of pinpointing them, and working tirelessly to change the ones that are impacting us in a negative way.
Change your speech, change your mindset about how much you have control over certain ays of thinking.
MOST of the time, the inability to change is based on a delusion that its not possible, or and unwillingness to do the ACTUAL WORK.
Work WITH your set of cards, not against them.