Iyanla Vanzant Explains Why Todays Women Are Mean & Aggressive | Angela Yee Moments

[@Divigne]

The more I grow into womanhood, the more i agree with the messages such as this one from Mother Iyanla. Femininity is silent. I get far more being silent. Iykyk, it's an art.

[@cjohnson_]

‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

[@KingGogh]

It's not so much about silence. Femininity is SOFTNESS. I don't want a meek, quiet woman who can't speak for herself, but I also don't want a woman with alpha male energy.

[@Nitabwatchn]

Yesssss I’ve said this as well. Silent is powerful

[@Divigne]

@KingGogh This is far beyond what men want from women, but how women should conduct themselves in general. When we say silence, we aren't talking about being mute. Again, if you know, then you know. It's an art form that cannot be explained. This is more of a conversation between women, because men do not quite get it either. Men just know that they like it.

[@KingGogh]

@@Divigne the issue is, women thinking they know what a MAN wants. A man can literally tell you what he wants and needs in his life and women STILL can't do or be that because they get in their own way. Unless silence was being used as a metaphor here (which, clearly it wasn't because she's using it as the OPPOSITE to women being mean and aggressive), this silence she speaks of falls under a form of submission. If you think a man doesn't need the SOFTNESS from a woman - nurturing, caring, loving, tenderness, FEMININE ENERGY....then you literally have no idea what a real man wants.

[@Deephouse_Gent66]

"Assertive" vs. "Aggressive." GREAT distinction!

[@tom11zz884]

All the same, because it is either their way or the highway.

[@stephenfoster1257]

Right! Assertive defends. Aggressive attacks.

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Someone telling you dudes NO- is not agressive. It means NO.

[@paperbagproductions103]

@@tom11zz884 exactly.

[@jordannewsom3606]

​@@AmberColeman-gq1wn That's not the talking point. It's the reverse

[@mzsjonzz2029]

I felt like I had to be more aggressive because I was dealing with aggressive people. When I changed my circle, I was able to be a soft woman again.

[@MrSmitty1074]

Stay away from low elements of humanity.

[@lindalubanga]

True I also learnt that my power as a woman is choosing who and what gets access to my space. And that has been freeing.

[@theeTJ]

I loved that she explained the difference between assertive and aggressive - that it correlates with intention. My parents raised me to be assertive yet graceful. For example, my dad would never go to the doctor and didn’t even have a PCP. I saw he needed care and one day I had just about enough! I contacted my doctor’s office and made him an appointment. I personally picked up the new patient paperwork and filled it out for him. I had him sign everything, gave him his appointment information, and put everything in a folder for him to bring along with his ID and insurance. I only had to do it once. Now, my dad takes care of all his appointments on his own and even makes them for my younger brother. My intention was to show him that it would be okay and that he could do it, even if he’s scared.

[@TheNaphisa03]

❤❤❤

[@w00deey12]

Happiness comes from being able to live in the current moment. I’ve experienced a lot of women who are always living somewhere in the past or future. I don’t want that around me

[@wanderingowl33]

Being aggressive is acting/reacting forcefully and/or hostile regardless of the circumstances, even when the atmosphere doesn’t necessarily demand it. Being assertive is demanding respect, while cooperating with your fellow human-beings.

[@dunbarf2413]

Not just demanding respect...giving respect is just as important to your fellow human beings understand.

[@wanderingowl33]

@ …ok - No one said it wasn’t. Note that I said - “While cooperating with your fellow human beings” Either way, we are talking about being assertive (you should google the meaning), so that’s barely relevant. Understand?

[@dunbarf2413]

@@wanderingowl33 "No one said it wasn’t." what you don't say is just as important as what you do say. No argument needed.

[@NarcSlayer912]

Different strokes for different folks. Her perspective is ideal for a group of those who fit that narrative while others may have a different point of view due to different experiences. What she is saying could be true for the group of women it applies to.

[@paperbagproductions103]

Exactly.

[@xunknown6073]

Smh...

[@lloydhudson6463]

So, being aggressive towards the opposite sex is a good thing, please explain.

[@Roots47-3]

I've remained single for some time and it's brought me such peace and joy. Being in relationships brought anger and a need to be more aggressive because of the abuse and neglect I experienced. So for me a happy woman is a single woman.

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

🎤

[@crystalbrame7886]

🎯 👏🏾👏🏾😊👏🏾👏🏾💯

[@PooLboY1031]

being single is nice but its not a good long term option.. after a while u need someone if u live alone

[@Roots47-3]

@@PooLboY1031 I've raised my children. I spent the first half of my life not living alone. I'm good.

[@Hope-qy8dr]

Relationships are not the problem. The people you were choosing to be in a relationship with was the problem. You might want to take a look why you were attracting and choosing certain men?

[@kevinjones8608]

People debate about the wrong things. If you want to be an independent single woman follow the advice of a successful single woman. If you desire a family and a long term husband/partner then heed the advice of those that are doing it successfully and happy. If all a man wants is a good time he'll gravitate towards the women that desire to remain single. If he wants to build a long lasting sustainable family he'll gravitate towards the women working towards that. Debating a position is not necessary. Find your tribe and align accordingly.

[@SouthernGirl8140]

That’s it and that’s all. We have better things to talk about in my opinion. A lot of these conversations will end if people use basic common sense. Getting paid to complain is hot right now but sure isn’t sustainable.

[@cjohnson_]

Wtf does that have to do with what she said tho

[@Tyrone950]

There is no such thing as a partner. From that point forward, the rest of the comment is reductive.

[@lady111411]

whoa Kevin, well said....

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Why can’t men stay single and leave women alone?

[@pinktrillness]

I used to be this way from dating broke insecure Black Men. I went to therapy and I started facing my insecurities and flaws. I no longer date bums.

[@gripwilson6229]

Take trill out your name you ain't deserving of that title

[@cyes1156]

So the "successful men" just smash now?

[@biscaynesupercars]

Water seeks its own level

[@highlovevibration]

Congratulations 😂❤

[@007ColdFire]

You've attracted bums and losers because you are still one

[@komkom6657]

Now watch all the stubborn and prideful women who hate accountability come for Iyanla and prove her right

[@Katlinaza]

Boom 👏🏾

[@Nk66222]

Now watch all the incompetent and bitter basement-dwelling men rally around a pick-me.

[@cg6705]

@@Nk66222 🔥

[@DialloMoore503]

@@Nk66222 What’s with the “pick-me” label?

[@cjohnson_]

​@@Nk66222 😂😂😂😂 so you proved her right....y'all are just taking up o2 atp I wish y'all would move y'all mean asses to an island somewhere y'all are embarrasing

[@cressfionajames]

I'm not listening to no more of this conversation in 2025. It's onward and upward, overseas.

[@a.c.3183]

This!!!

[@Black____]

Smh..

[@demetriusevans4139]

@@cressfionajames Enjoy. I hear those passport sis ladies are being chosen left and right!

[@markparham]

crazy women and men are all over the world going overseas is not going to change anything people are people regardless of race or skin color

[@markparham]

@@a.c.3183 crazy women and men are all over the world going overseas is not going to change anything people are people regardless of race or skin color

[@backyardbullies9105]

She talking to the women in that room!!!!!!

[@cjohnson_]

And in these comments

[@josiahbutler2254]

i think the aggression comes from being left alone & being done wrong so many times, at one point it makes you fed up. Women today have become prideful without needing a man, and i actually support those women because yall dont understand a lot of men are careless and do the most cruel stuff that they dont want you doing to them, especially when it comes to infidelity. Due to being failed by men, a lot of women have taken the initiative to support them selves.

[@blackhawk6615]

You must be joking 🤣

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

🎯

[@demetriusevans4139]

Yeah, she's an innocent angel. Never once playing a role in her own outcome..

[@alonalove3118]

It is not about being failed by men it is about not taking accountability or ownership in CONTINOUSLY allowing men whose ministry is to steal,kill,and destroy in your life...

[@maloishwilson]

So when you have; welfare, family, and law's, in your favor, you're doing it on your own?

[@AET1689]

I think when you are woman fending for herself that being “aggressive”, “direct” or “assertive” is a by product of that ! I do agree that true feminity leans into silence but understand that this is learned over time and thru hard lessons! I’m at a place where I don’t speak to or have the energy to entertain nonsense; I’m 35 - the wisdom came w time and let it continue to come

[@Smarty2able]

If iyanla is helpful why isn't she married herself? This is all about clout and money. Stop hiring these fake coaches that say a lot of nothing for 30 min segment on a podcast and then a lot of women are left clueless having the same table talk til they're in the nursing home.

[@Amodernelder]

Exactly. It’s just another grift.

[@marilynngraham7129]

Yes! The whole “Beloved” movement is getting old.

[@matttate920]

Married to a white man. That’s Doctor Iyanla Vanzant. The sisterhood should know better than to down one of their own who’s actually been trained on these sorts of things. Why bring down your Elder? Shall your children bring you down as well. She was respectful to you lol! Hit dawgs holler.

[@pc8679]

Not every advice relates to marriage. Just being a better human being is commendable. There are alot of nasty people in relationship and there are alot of good people who are single. Focus on being a better person, regardless of whether or not it will get you a husband.

[@thegodblogger3812]

Men aren't intimidated by alpha women. We simply are not attracted or interested. 😐

[@israelwashington4865]

No such thing as an "alpha woman "

[@MrDaRiAn21]

@@israelwashington4865there is, my mom and grandma

[@SouthernGirl8140]

@@israelwashington4865yall just made up “alpha man”. Since we’re making up terms that doesn’t have much impact, let us all make up things that doesn’t actually improve anything in our community.

[@cjohnson_]

😂😂😂😂😂 alpha women aren't attracted to beta men so problem solved

[@BryanC-kw1py]

​@@cjohnson_. Alpha men and women can't coexist.

[@zco6310]

I didn’t listen to this broadcast. All I know is when our men are in trouble they run back to woman who will hold it down as we did for centuries. Be yourself, be happy!

[@markparham]

women are not a monolith and not all women hold it down for the men in relationships did you know that women file for divorce at a higher rate than men in america

[@catmouse2882]

​@markparham men benefit from marriage. Women don't. So why leave something you benefit from??? Abusive ass men don't file for divorce. Even Abusive men benefit from marriage.

[@tom11zz884]

You are talking about the pookies...lol Most Black men are in the middle class, and have never ran back to women for help.

[@genesewatson648]

I definitely agree i really try not to but i have put up a wall because the guys that have been in my life have played with my feelings or took them for granted and it’s hard to trust someone is being genuine with me

[@chrismunoz7859]

Seems like your just drawn to that type 😂

[@TempeSoldier123]

Maybe you should choose better men….right?

[@demiandash2702]

Funny thing is, some guys be playing and using someone’s attitude as yours to be the reason for their garbage behaviour as well. Vicious cycle

[@MrTwonetwone]

@@chrismunoz7859how is that funny? She’s basically telling us how she feels and you laugh 🤦🏾‍♂️

[@SouthernGirl8140]

@@TempeSoldier123 you’re so helpful.

[@harvelle1]

It all begins in the home. Follow them home. Meet their Mothers. You will get your answer. Guaranteed

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

NOT ALWAYS!

[@Waakiyl01]

YES!!!!!! the meddling mother will wreck your relationship.Happened to me in EVERY serious relationship.

[@stayflyking]

The first mistake is applying the word alpha to a woman in the first place.

[@lsowner10]

Like we didn’t see them scrambling for toilet paper during the Trump “vid!”

[@princellasmith7562]

I get tired of folks telling women to be soft and vulnerable and not addressing predatory men, widespread misogyny in the workplace that leads to our paychecks being lighter, and a world that is set against us. Ask a number of women where being soft and vulnerable got them. I am kind, generous, affectionate, and caring towards those I can TRUST. You don’t automatically get that from me just because I’m a woman and you think you deserve it.

[@hey_mr_ash]

So is being feminine and soft conditional for you as a woman ? Because as a man I have to be strong and masculine at all times regardless of how I'm treated or the environment im in at least that's expectation.

[@ShannonsBibleStudy]

@@hey_mr_ash Softness and femininity is taken advantage of and abused. A woman in NYC was set on fire in the subway recently because she was seen as vulnerable.

[@ShannonsBibleStudy]

@@hey_mr_ash The fact that you chose to argue with her is why women are not as sappily sweet as you would like.

[@Smarty2able]

It's not the men it's you

[@ImaJiveTurkey]

​@@ShannonsBibleStudy since when is asking a simple question and making a simple statement arguing? His response sounded to me like he is willing to have a conversation.

[@Hope-qy8dr]

It is kind of sad that these two grown women have never heard the difference between being assertive and being aggressive.

[@vinmarz]

When a person lacks the peace and understanding that only God can provide, this leaves the door wide open for aggression and hate to flourish.

[@AllNaturalEverything]

🎯

[@ucheibegbulem]

Absolutely

[@MrSmitty1074]

Negative energy will destroy someone.

[@minimalistqueen2992]

Maybe being aggressive and mean is a way to protect ourselves from the world because we don’t have anyone to protect us. You can pass down generational trauma as well.

[@joyell821]

Honestly, you are damned if u do. Being aggressive and mean is dangerous these days, because these men want ALL of the smoke. They actually look for reasons to fight and argue with women. It's safer to be quiet and polite. Sometimes they will stil turn that into a negative, but even then, it's easier to brush it off and get away safely.

[@minimalistqueen2992]

@ You can’t tell someone how to handle their own trauma. They’re going to handle it in a way that they see fits best even if it doesn’t makes sense to someone else . I understand what you’re saying but if being mean and aggressive protects them then they wouldn’t be acting out in such . Also, I think mental health plays a big role in this as well. Not to make this about race but it’s overlooked especially in the black community. There seems to be a cultural stigma that those who are battling mental health issues are considered weak so with this mindset people are going to be uncomfortable disclosing their issues as well as having no interest in seeking therapy. All I know is every problem has a root and we are some damaged ppl. As far as these little boys, I’ve heard it all. They could actually help fix the problem by becoming leaders in the community but most of them rather take the easy way out.

[@Malvo6820]

She ain't lyin. It's hard to hold doors open without getting the stairdown. It's hard to date. This is our community. We are damaged people and we can't blame no one but ourselves.

[@LibraVibesSnice80]

Hello!!!! 💯💯💯

[@maloishwilson]

@@Malvo6820 Preach 🙏

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Stop harming black women.

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

And we can blame someone- let’s start with black men. Our “ leaders”. There you go

[@JustMalcolm914]

​@@AmberColeman-gq1wnhush up

[@2_blAck]

Yep, I’m mean and have been all my life. I’ll help anyone but I don’t like to be bothered outside of that. I’m guarded with everyone, we don’t get comfortable with me. Because then you think you can play with me, and I didn’t come with dice🤷🏽‍♀️

[@TruthDefined4life]

Change your circle of men and friends.

[@pgdarling301]

One morning I was lost getting to new office space in DC federal building. I asked a security guard how to get to my side of the building and he snapped at me. Said " you told me you were going to xyz I'm trying to help you". I said im lost, our agency just moved back to headquarters I don't know where I'm going. Yes, it was a black man. Could he have been having a bad morning? Yes but so could I yet I still showed restraint and compassion. My co worker made a great point, some of them act like we chose that job for them. Sorry but I no longer look to or expect black men to protect me. Not one my entire life has been there for me. I'm trying not to become a bitter Betty honestly its a struggle.

[@justthinking4421]

U can't control how other ppl respond, U can only control how U🫵🏾 react!

[@pgdarling301]

@justthinking4421 💯

[@thedropzoneunlimited5710]

To the women attacking her and calling her pick me.... Just be lgbt and enjoy it. No need to waste your time.

[@leighbotts9694]

Two things can be true.

[@jamberry8026]

If life were as simple as you it wouldn't even be worth living. 🙄🤔

[@mondocjenson-dy8zd]

Only a fool would want these NABS aka high mileage Flood cars.

[@ICEMAN24072]

Shahrazad Ali schooled Iyanla years ago. I have yet to see her say she was right .

[@darylmccrea3834]

Shoutout, The Great Mother teacher Shahrazad Ali

[@leighbotts9694]

Mammy Ali and Mammy Van Zant are dangerous for the black community. Especially Shaharzad Ali, co-signing physical violence on women. Miss me with that.

[@ICEMAN24072]

@@darylmccrea3834 💯

[@MichaelMitchell-k6r]

Im a dude living in Akron Ohio...these women here are absolutely rough..not lady like at all

[@luvsgod2]

Women are educated and happy. Please stop spreading such a negative narrative. Iyanla is far more generous with love and understanding with terrible acting men than women.

[@CeliniacForLife]

Exactly!

[@DaniTheAlchemist33]

Women never want to be held accountable 😂

[@KennyBucketz]

Eh, women aren’t really as happy these days. Women’s happiness has been on a decline. As right now, about 1/4 of American women are on psych meds. But even if it was true that women are spot and educated, that wouldn’t mean women aren’t mean and aggressive. A happy and educated man can also be mean and aggressive

[@DialloMoore503]

Educated how?

[@cg6705]

I hate when elders compare who they were to todays younger generation, it shows a lack of wisdom

[@konsyansnou8623]

Too many will try to be controlling and call it being assertive but they'll start by controling you

[@trutocore]

“I’m alpha a alpha woman” sums everything up in America.

[@ThesisOriginals]

“Oh no she didn’t” I’m here for those comments

[@matttate920]

Move around. The key to your shackle is already in the slot!

[@dorothytitus8082]

Iyanla on here lying AGAIN! Thats the issue with females is the older generation like herself who taught us NOTHING! ANd have the nerve to complain about this generation! Im so sick of the disingenuous conversations!

[@justthinking4421]

If U keep doing what u r doing... u'll continue to keep getting what ur gettin!!🤷🏾‍♀️

[@Waakiyl01]

​@@justthinking4421notice how AGE gets criticized? Fortunately I LISTENED to my elders and took what I could apply to MYSELF.Best advice I ever got.

[@ISayWhatIWant]

They did. They taught you to accept the bare minimum and that marriage defines women. If u not married, u failed

[@justthinking4421]

Gramps also taught u not have kids w Randoms & marry b4 u carry bc that's ONE of the best ways to build generational wealth via a 2 income household!!! Guess u missed that lesson too!?! U gone learn TODAY!!!🤣🤣🤣

[@paperbagproductions103]

Aggressive and assertive both have the same result and intention...just say I am an old fashioned woman that upholds the standards of patriarchy.

[@HolyGhostBabyTV1]

She was supposed to say, cause we "Sisterhood" made em that way. We were convinced that we are greater than our Men. Smarter than God. Not.

[@NecieytheGREAT]

She’s right ! Young LADIES please listen to your aunt EVEN the man have told US… we are toooooo much! AND WE ARE!! Listen up and focus on being better WOMEN!

[@MK-ch5uh]

By women she means black women lol

[@Futuristbillpicone]

Not only black women

[@FatherFamilyFriends]

My father (R.I.P.) was a millionaire via real estate during a time that it was unheard of a black man doing so. He was the BOSS (full stop) but after he laid out the plans for the family, my mother was the orchestrator of EVERYTHING. I don't think either of them would have been successful without that teamwork. She followed his direction and she made everything happen and stuck to his word. I think modern day women do not understand the authority my mother had. I think they just see my father was a Boss, in a negative way. I look at the "experiment" of women (and men!) breaking away from traditional roles over the last 30-40yrs and believe until we put the man as head of family, we will continue to wonder aimlessly without unity. That being said, weak men are ultimately the problem. A strong man, not abusive, but strong enough to vet, potential females (w/o looks being the major marker) and has the ability to leave any woman that cannot play her position on his team.

[@justthinking4421]

What u r talking about requires selflessness, commitment, & love by all involved. A lot of ppl don't have or don't value these characteristics, but they still expect good results.😮‍💨

[@tamiyadav7106]

I agree! This needs to be taught in all households!

[@robertjordan-y2u]

You say the problem is weak men, but it's the women that have been "supported" and lead away by the government for decades to step away from the men! It's the women who have raised these so called weak men that they complain about!

[@tennekkiii]

Agreed 👍🏾

[@gooserich3970]

She telling the truth

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Iyanla…. We don’t care. It’s time for black men to focus on something else. If we are not going to hold black men accountable for anything and blame everything on black women- then just leave this tired topic alone. Let them go elsewhere . Let them choose other women and move on. Good for them. Give black women and this constant abuse a BREAK.

[@AllNaturalEverything]

☝🏽

[@JeremiahD3721]

I agree but everyone not just men need to be held accountable if needed

[@nettakay2116]

Once you see a conversation isn't going anywhere and needs to be abandoned you put on your mature undergarments and disengage. All that going back and forth, only hearing a word or two here and there out of context and talking over one another trying to say the most hurtful things possible is for the birds.

[@AllNaturalEverything]

🎯

[@Caligirl1977]

If Iyanla has so much advice and wisdom to offer about how women should be, why isn’t she married herself? 🤔 As a married woman myself, I will continue getting advice from other women who have been successfully married for years

[@marilynngraham7129]

Exactly!!! She has a string of failed relationships.

[@pc8679]

What advice would you give. Is being aggressive and mean better for marriage and relationships in general?

[@Silversiren-d1b]

Aggressiveness often manifests outwardly, while femininity tends to embody a quieter strength. Some women today may exhibit assertiveness as a reflection of the empowerment gained through the Women's Liberation movement.

[@jacquelineperry8515]

The more this generation have as far as good jobs and money the harder they are to deal with there just not good people.my mom had little or no money raising ten kids on welfare but she was the kindest woman I knew and she wasn’t materialistic if she just had enough to feed her kids she was happy

[@tandt7694]

If you want a successful relationship, follow advice from people who have successful relationships.

[@pc8679]

I think it is good to be a better person, regardless of whether or not you are in a relationship.

[@lee_cummings]

Iyanla has a disconnect with the black community...she thought that she was going to come on the scene and be the next Ophra and basch the brothers...but the brothers wasn't going...ask DMX! This woman ain't ......

[@DonnaB1]

Must be the women that she associates with... Please don't put all of us under the same stereotype...😢😢

[@ashleyeaton2153]

I absolutely respect everything She stated just now absolutely truth and direct

[@angelowhite4701]

Let's be honest. I visited my cousins they are in their 50's they all said to me. When you know there are no laws for you to hurt a man, no laws to take things for a man, and no consequences for your behavior than you get the mindset to be mean and hateful because who's going to do anything to you, the law also protects you hurting men my cousin said. She said women truely feel authority does not applies to them. It's as if they laugh at it and see it as a joke. The truth she said women very seldom think they are under any authority and it's the authority she said doing nothing to them and rewarding them for their bad behavior have made women that way, not men.

[@MrDaRiAn21]

Miss Iyanla is right!

[@shareeminor9125]

Sit back and go with the flow unless it means you harm.

[@Popularloner86]

I agree with her women are aggressive and controlling i also think women should stay at home and let men work.

[@kingdomthinker9794]

The Jezebel spirit!

[@KingGogh]

To me? Theres a difference from silence and SOFTNESS. A woman should still have her own voice, opinion and backbone, but it shouldnt come from a place of alpha male energy. Men dont want to feel like they are dating one of the homies. But I get it - a lot of single, independent women (especially single mothers) HAVE to be strong and somewhat of an "alpha" but you should never need to carry that energy for your man. Just my opinion 🤷🏽‍♂️

[@ShannonsBibleStudy]

Men have been on the internet for years arguing about paying for dates and 50/50. I agree. No one wants to feel like they are dating a homie.

[@KingGogh]

@ShannonsBibleStudy lol the hell does that have to do with ANYTHING I said? Who raised you?? As a woman, you expect a man whom isn't your husband to pay your EVERYTHING???? For all of your meals, your bills....EVERYTHING? You depend on men whom aren't your husband to do everything for you?? Even expecting the majority is silly. Women fought long and hard to gain their independence and become equals to men in the workforce. To make their own money. To CHANGE the traditional roles of households and being stay at home wives and mothers. But you want to make your own money and STILL expect a man to play the traditional role? Are you cooking his meals? Washing his draws? Cleaning his house? Raising his children? Being his softness? Creating a place of comfort and peace? Does he have to come home and worry about ANYTHING?

[@kuramobay2445]

A masculine man prefers a feminine woman.

[@ReeceDee]

Their power is silent...but men wish it was silence. 🤣

[@leonardlyles7505]

That's one important thing I love about Iyzanla Bold Spirit, she's Sincere, Honest, and as she stated Straight Forward. She's NOT Afraid to Speak the TRUTH. She's a Precious Jewel.

[@kayjay3948]

1:13 The gag is that she is mean in person 😂.

[@thebossdotsiren2830]

Who??

[@peach2650]

Who is more mean and aggressive than Iyanla???

[@mr.tooles9725]

No such thing as an alpha woman only masculine women

[@djeanpierre]

Exactly. Who are they alpha over? Other women? You’re not alpha you’re just a domineering, insufferable beech.

[@terryGrindz_69]

Jus say the B Word already. Geeesh. 😂

[@francineroach7032]

I don't think people should be grouped together in any category by anyone! God is Alpha.

[@demetrajackson6935]

I definitely get and understand this somewhat!

[@prof3ssor178]

I SEEN THIS TITLE AND DIDN'T HESITATE TO PRESS PLAY ▶️ IT'S FACTS.

[@stars-are-us]

Talk about intimate partner violence next. Talk about red pill indoctrination also.

[@MartinaPolk]

I AGREE 💯 with everything Iyanla just said !!

[@tcalip2968]

Iyanla we look at you and other Women and we tell our Men to not come at us any ole way because we love them. That's Me being honest and supportive. That's demanding what our Men require from us which is respect. If we had a misunderstanding. Okay let's work away from that and build over. Life is too short to carry on about nothing that cannot be changed. The future is our change. I'm willing to grow with my Man but not far behind my Man. I'm not disrespectful. I am nurturing and caring unless I feel disrespected. I was disrespected when my hard earned things were past on to asians like I won't stand on my feet for 17 hours straight and work for what I birth so mines can have something. It's not right to say that's not true when the proof has been shown. Thanks for sharing.

[@Beautifulhighpriestess]

I'm single now and I've become more softer and more feminine.. being in a relationship can be draining and toxic especially the wrong one.

[@lakiyalomax4572]

Cause black women we go through so much

[@brandonburns5365]

Like what?

[@waltersmith7156]

Aggression or assertiveness is the same thing if there is an absence of being tactful.

[@MRRHORHO]

Take the advice ladies. Shes not saying shut up, she's saying observe and learn when to speak up

[@ThorneInyoass]

Ignore and avoid. Happiness and peace will follow.

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

🎤

[@deewoo2776]

Either you change or be left behind

[@jacejacksonandkailee5526]

Men and women understand everything but love and respect

[@soulsister2410]

As women we have been put in this situation of being aggressive by society, family responsibility’s, and being forced to work harder than anyone else.

[@JohnSmith-er7dw]

Can you explain how women were put in this situation of being aggressive by society?

[@theadrenalizedartist6843]

I appreciate Ms. Iyanla stating the differences between assertive vs aggressive. I think a lot of women are aggressive because so many women have had to function like men at home and at work. If they don’t so much is not done, and/or they have no chance of being viewed as equal. Maybe they do not know how to assert themselves without the meanness. I know I am assertive. I am not going to be mean and spiteful but I am also not going to be a doormat. Some women are mean and callous which makes it hard to even deal with them at all.

[@sblogan07]

The last statement from Iyanla ,🔑🔑🔑 !!!

[@jameswilson1522]

Wow... ...incredible 🙏🏽🕯

[@lsowner10]

There’s no such thing as an “alpha” woman.

[@getright2650]

Devices 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@elrubio687]

I would say this applies to liberal women from big cities. Regular ladies from smaller towns up north, or states in the south, or even places overseas, are sweethearts

[@dr.b1346]

I agree with Iyanla 100%....I love alpha women! Was raised, bred, and trained by one!

[@clayjr86]

I thought this was going to be a woman bashing women. I'm glad it wasn't. Keep doing yards thing cause gray areas in friendship or relationship becomes spoiled. Keep it real with the people u care about because we men hate the gray. Stay aggressive with good intentions & i will always love you

[@jasminmuvaherbal]

❤so good.

[@Cogic]

My ex girl used to complain how i wasnt assertive people said i need to say what I mean and mean what i say I start doing it and boom 💥🤯💥 all I hear is wtf your crazy you dont know what to say out your mouth why would you say that dont you think before you speak. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells when dealing with women i try to not f up a conversation but i cant help myself...I thought if I be more careful it will be better but it only makes it worse by women thinking im not assertive.....Im just a different guy and its not like im disrespectful

[@shellymoo2606]

Iyanla isn't wrong.

[@DevonnyDX]

Today’s women are not mean and aggressive. Men just need to stop backing down!

[@lynwill9946]

Isn’t that interesting. How many times she been married?

[@Smarty2able]

It's about $ for her. Don't listen to her

[@leekslounge]

What is: Lack of Parenting. For $800

[@stevennaraine9429]

The two younger women needed to have the words: aggressive and assertive distinguished. SMH

[@DESSIE477]

By assuming you are a alpha woman already says you on the right path

[@eia2704]

Specifically Black women!

[@Nk66222]

Um what happened to Iyanla Vanzant? Did they clone-swap her? So disappointed.

[@clutchk5240]

Disappointed why?

[@gleauxingup]

She’s pandering to her audience (angry black men) since black women wised up, including Oprah🤷🏽‍♀️

[@Roots47-3]

She took the Shaharazad Ali route. You make more money and sell more books pandering to abusive Black men than actually uplifting women.

[@Nk66222]

@@Roots47-3 True (sadly)

[@wavycrockett4261]

No she sees that there is a problem with modern women

[@quintinr.6760]

Look, I don’t care!!! I would pick a black woman every time. Cause I will straighten it out in my home. If she does not listen then I would switch to a different black woman. Just can’t see myself partnering up with anything else. ✊🏾

[@MELSEASON]

Message to all women. You do not have to listen to this TRUTH. but if you dont please accept what happens next and blame no one

[@Branfrazier]

It’s the music and social media have made women entitled and greedy

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

That Too! It's a virtual Psych Ward.

[@markparham]

women have been like that before social media and the music we listen to today some women in the 1940s, 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, and 1980s were messing around with multiple men and causing chaos some people have grandmothers that were for the "streets"

[@markparham]

@@IntellectuallyAstute women have been like that before social media and the music we listen to today some women in the 1940s, 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, and 1980s were messing around with multiple men and causing chaos some people have grandmothers that were for the "streets"

[@IntellectuallyAstute]

@@markparham That's BOTH ways hence "Poppa Was a Rolling Stone." Are YOUR INTENTIONS to EDIFY the discussion or to be 1 sided?

[@AllNaturalEverything]

​@@IntellectuallyAstute☝🏽

[@JOSHUA8CS]

It’s so a part of a new found freedom and woman are assimilating that new power. It’s a growing process and it truly ok. We all are learning and growing in this society ❤