Jay Leno Best of Headlines Part 9

This edition of Jay Leno Headlines was owned by NBC Studios (1996-2004)
Video is simply for entertainment.
Remembering the Best Headlines by Jay Leno of The Tonight Show.
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[@josemoreno3334]

After Jay left, The Tonight Show went down hill. Sad.

[@jamiewiesner135]

Yes it did.

[@magnetsoldiercephas331]

At least he gave us memes 😂

[@therealxunil2]

You misspelled “Johnny”

[@cindyclay4429]

Jimmy Fallon sucks

[@grisslebear]

As far as I'm concerned it ended.

[@sferg9582]

Ahhh yes. The days when late night television was worth watching. Thank you Jay Leno.

[@JavierArveloCruzSantana]

Why does everyone keep saying crap like this? Every episode of an older show is "the good old days when ___". I loved this video, but it's nothing to write home about. Get over it. Keep watching today's crap and tomorrow you'll wish for it and so on and so forth.

[@sferg9582]

@@JavierArveloCruzSantana Not a chance. Like you said, keep watching today's CRAP. I remember when late night television was entertaining. Now, it's nothing but a political moaning and groaning session.

[@thomaschristopher8593]

@@JavierArveloCruzSantana why would i waste my time watching today's crap? i haven't watched any of these late night shows since leno left. i gave fallon a chance for about a week. but then turned that crap off and haven't bother with it anymore.

[@barryle9605]

.

[@herchelleonwood7463]

@@sferg9582 yes its sad when todays late nite hosts such as Colbert and Seth Meijers do a million times better at reporting how corrupt the GQP has become than MSM does ! Obviously your dull normal brain doesn't have room for the truth or reality !

[@needaladyfriend1]

Watching Headlines on Monday nights was my favorite part of the week. So funny.

[@trueflip25]

I would watch this w my family right before going to sleep. Good times man.

[@TheWriterNW]

Leno was the best!

[@dianelengyel568]

Jay was the Best! Clean jokes and funny.

[@magnetsoldiercephas331]

Loved how he implied the dirty but let the audience figure it out. Classy

[@warloew8610]

I had one I always wanted to send in. It was in Shotgun News and it was a review for a .357 Magnum. One of the pictures showed the gun shooting at a large paper target and the caption was, “This .357 is powerful enough to put a big hole in paper”

[@simalin11]

I miss the days of good late night talk shows.

[@monicacoyle3760]

Was in a cranky mood today until I found Kay's one liners.glad there's still some comedy to be found. Miss u jay

[@janishart5128]

I still get a laugh out of the "Peeches" ad, the way Jay says it - and it takes a lot to get me to LOL!!!!

[@johnalang]

The funny thing is "Peaches" was spelled correctly with the "Necktarines" ad.

[@janishart5128]

@@johnalang: Yeah - how'd they do that?! Must be a different variety! I wonder which ones cost more! Hahaha!!!

[@CdA_Native]

I remember looking through an old TV Guide once, and found a TV show promoting "Sounds you can make with your own body!"

[@thiawilliams6984]

Great collection....I do remember them from years ago....don't want to think how long ago....BUT.. BUT I WAS AGAIN LAUGHING TIL MY SIDES HURT....THANKS....this is 2023 August..utube is just showing this to me now....

[@ThatsnewsTV]

He and Kev were a great double act. I really had tears of laughter during some of them.

[@avi2125]

Kev's gentle laughter...miss all that...

[@droiduranus]

I agree! You're a simpleton Dave is way funnier, Jay's reading funny schit

[@avi2125]

This is aerobics for the entire body...tummy at least. So funny... I watch...rewatch...rewatch...this is therapy! 😀

[@God.Almighty]

kevin's background laughs make these even funnier.

[@robadams5799]

He's the Ed McMahon of the 21st century.

[@MiguelJuanez]

That's exactly as I remember it :)

[@nrich5127]

From a time when late Night TV was actually funny ... a long long time ago ..

[@hijodelaisla275]

"actually"

[@donaldsauer9850]

DC wdvw ww FCC xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx x xxx xxx xxx xxx x xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx CD access xxx x xxx xxx xxx xxx ß xxx x xxx

[@Laura-tp8wz]

Miss these days!

[@therealupergirl477]

He needs his own show again

[@nathankrush3289]

I watched Carson and Letterman. I like Conan. But none of them was as funny as Jay Leno.

[@nathankrush3289]

Should have said " were ".

[@nathankrush3289]

Should have said " were ".

[@boataxe4605]

He’s got one, Jay Leno’s garage.

[@StephenGillie]

@@boataxe4605 He could have stars visit his garage. Usually it's boring KZbinrs trying out his cool cars.

[@joemurphy2470]

My favorite will always be the wedding announcements.

[@leecowell8165]

Never cared for those... Mine was stupid people (when he pointed to his temple) and stupid criminals.

[@u.s.militia7682]

I used to have a pair of those Reef sandals with the bottle opener on them. They were great. 👍👍

[@raybyrnes3516]

Leno was the greatest

[@AndrewVelonis]

Carson.

[@revinevan87]

I can't stop laughing at the PEECHES.

[@brentfox6540]

PEECHES

[@afriend9428]

*I want some too!*

[@bradeyliverio9286]

HEY MEESTER, YOU LIKE SOME PEECHES?! 😂

[@pi_beta7306]

@@bradeyliverio9286 🤣

[@jozeflenders]

I remember now why I tuned into Leno. This was hilarious, thanks for posting. No politics, just funny!

[@lonestar2078]

to be fair, mocking government's wasteful spending at least hints at politics

[@nathankrush3289]

I watched Carson, watched Letterman, and I like Conan. But none of them made me laugh like Jay Leno.

[@boataxe4605]

There were plenty of Bill Clinton sex jokes.

[@Michelles222]

​@@boataxe4605Plenty! And Bush, and Gore too, actually. Lol

[@boataxe4605]

@@Michelles222 Yep! The best comedians are equal opportunity offenders.

[@roberthoward5015]

Jay for president

[@montiliusbeatty9831]

No! He thinks his religion is the only valid one. He would be just like a republican whom does that. Check out his bible literacy video. Like it's the only religion.

[@punothebear]

@@montiliusbeatty9831 Why would anyone want to have a religion that they didn't believe was the only one?

[@conniepenner4795]

I love watching cause it is before 2016, and he is clean funny. not racist or misogynistic. Good guy. They don't make them like they used to. He was the best

[@geminiecricket4798]

Baby boomer

[@petroglyph888mcgregor2]

At 18:18, the phrase "Carne Molida" is Spanish for "Ground Beef", but the word "Molida" by itself can also be translated as "worn out".

[@Laceykat66]

I so miss Leno. Thank you.

[@RichieMajaw]

Me too... and you're welcome.

[@phoebebrooks6455]

So funny, I'm going to look at newspaper headlines more closely from now on.

[@karengummer6657]

I miss these. My favorite is still the Back to School Special for Breast Implants.

[@vangazmicvoyage5077]

My daughter and I got a big laugh over the Amigone Funeral Home. Not long after that I actually saw that funeral home while traveling to Buffalo NY and had to call her.

[@MaggieMotta-lj4bc]

Too funny!

[@samjordan8800]

It's the DMV! Imagine how slow the police had to have been for the driver to make it all the way through the line before they arrived!

[@jonathanbair523]

Headlines and the segment of interviewing folks on the street.... Man I miss Jay.....

[@MaggieMotta-lj4bc]

Jay needs a weekly show with Kevin Headlines and Jay Walking...one hour!

[@leecowell8165]

He picked the dumbest responses on those street interviews. and of course all those people had to sign off on them and probably got paid a few $$ for usage. Leno was absolutely a class act all the way.

[@jeffmansfield914]

25:08 I love how Jay is talking about GE appliances but he’s such a car guy he says “GM” instead.

[@jefolson6989]

Miss Jay. Genial, clean, and my kind of funny. Someone do a compilation of wedding announcements!

[@haroldwilkes6608]

When you wrote "Miss Jay" I wondered if he'd done something I hadn't heard about, then I finished the comment. Yes, I miss him and Johnny too.

[@mamacatselliot]

I love Kevin’s laugh. It’s infectious.

[@michirican]

The wonderful crystal clear VHS recording.

[@justayoutuber1906]

VHS is the next vinyl

[@Michelles222]

Loved it!

[@nthgth]

This is not a good example of what VHS is capable of lol

[@leecowell8165]

Just deal with it better than nothing

[@georgesenda1952]

Best headlines ever !

[@powerrangermaster96]

the chinese text actually translates to THIS DATE

[@HereForTheComments]

I love Conan, I do, but this was truly a special time. Not just for late night TV, but for culture as a whole.

[@richardmyers1506]

What about today? Is it special?

[@HereForTheComments]

@@richardmyers1506 Nah, today is ordinary.

[@StephenGillie]

@@richardmyers1506 Yeah, culture today is special...education. It's like we're having to go through remedial classes over Everything I Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten. Meanwhile Jay's here on video from the past, teaching master classes on how to be kind while being very funny.

[@sanansa4567]

i miss his opening monologue and these bits. After a long day, a few laughs helped put my mind at ease. Now all the Tonight Shows are just depressing, I don't even know why people would want to watch

[@Clutching.My.Pearls]

I had to stop the video and catch my breath from laughing. Hysterical!!!

[@josemoreno3334]

Me too.

[@jimpatterson3286]

Damn I needed these laughs 🤣😂. Every laugh would offend somebody somewhere today 🍻👍.

[@bretthess6376]

Screw 'em.

[@AndrewVelonis]

No, just you.

[@bretthess6376]

@@AndrewVelonis And your point is? What I'm saying is those who are offended by everything can never be happy.

[@cordelianoelle3644]

I, like everyone, needs to laugh a lot in one day for health. I sometimes watch funny animals and sometimes I watch Jay Leno Headlines. Thanks for the post, my heart health needed it.

[@Richb144]

Steve Allen, Carson, Leno, and then nothing. Sad.

[@richardjezewski]

I cried myself to tears with laughter on this

[@marilynlincoln7173]

The best part is when he cracks himself up! No one better.

[@JDB2552]

The tank advertised as ideal for livestock is a serious, accurate description. Large herds of cattle may need large drinking water sources, and the plastic tanks may be easier to keep clean and sanitary than other materials.

[@Ifyernotawakeyet]

Only the accompanying picture is of a family in a swimming pool!

[@cynthiacronin2794]

This is laugh out loud stuff! 🤣🤣😂😂

[@Collidedatoms]

"The next question is what's a billionaire" I spit out my ginger ale and died.

[@furydeath]

someone needs to do Headlines again IM sure there still a few out in the world

[@admanharv8575]

never happen with this peanut brittle generation

[@TugaAvenger]

Half those local newspapers have gone out of business

[@suewills7099]

Ah you gotta love him Jay you’re the best

[@skyebird3933]

This is so funny; everytime I watch it. Thanks for posting.

[@darlahaines6928]

I got on a laughing jag with this Headlines collection!! 😂😅😂

[@treebuck]

The headlines from the Paris Hilton DUI segment may be the best group EVER!

[@samjordan8800]

"But your honor, my MoFo is--" Judge says "I said no cursing! You're in contempt! Bailiff..." And just as the lawyers from MoFo enter the courtroom their client is being dragged off to jail for an overnight stay...LOL!

[@rickjohnson6347]

If you tried this today they'd be linning up with lawsuits. Only real mature people have a sense of humor like this.

[@sludge4125]

Do you even think before posting?

[@GenericPast]

@@sludge4125 Gonna file a lawsuit and find out?

[@sludge4125]

@@GenericPast No, I’m just going to pout. 🤪

[@lizasilomar8545]

Thank you!

[@binaway]

I wonder if Ineeda Bath still lives at 772 Fremont Rd.

[@anteeker]

I was thinking the exact same thing- read it right thru the marker!

[@boataxe4605]

Yes, with her roommate Mike Hunt.

[@spazbobstinkpants]

@@boataxe4605 That was hilarious in Porky's. Someone needs to make an AI Simpsons clip of Bart calling Moe asking for names like that. Moe "Does anybody know Mike Oxmaul? Com'on people, Mike Oxmaul."

[@nthgth]

​@@spazbobstinkpantsLMAO

[@szqsk8]

lol the man who thought his wife had fallen out of bed because the whole house shook 😅

[@darlahaines6928]

This situation reminds me of an AC/DC song 😳

[@rigelmoon9030]

These are criminally insane. After about five minutes my gut hurt from laughing. But, I continued on anyway.

[@jameysummers1577]

"Please find me not guilty of the crimes that I committed" I almost feel bad for the guy for saying something so dumb.

[@marthavillanueva5505]

We now have ‘sexing’ machines. Their called cell phones.

[@richardhamblen5526]

JAY GETS AS MUCH PLEASURE FROM THE JOKES AS THE AUDIENCE, LOL..

[@2101case]

Love these.

[@richardhamblen5526]

WOOOO-OOO! ADDRESSED TO "KEVIN BONGBANKS"..

[@eligebrown8998]

Always loved headlines. Kevin Ubanks laugh is contagious. Sux he left the tonight show.

[@carlisacar9328]

The one with the University "Labraries" also said under the highlighting... "Hours will "Very" instead of "Vary". I think the publication needs new staff too.

[@jaysonraphaelmurdock8812]

I wonder if they found any civil war planes yet? 😄😄😄😄

[@richardhamblen5526]

"DIALING '911' TO GET EASIER"..HOW? DIAL 1? HAHAHAHAAHAA!

[@jbalogh01]

This is gold. I was sad when it ended. Sucks we can't have fun anymore due to criebabies thats offended by everything.

[@bretthess6376]

Sure we can have fun. Who cares what a bunch of losers think?

[@jbalogh01]

@@bretthess6376 well yeah. But I used to attend the comedy club down the street from me but it wasn't funny anymore. Everyone had to tell lame jokes or walk on eggshells. I have to seek out old stuff online or go through my tapes.

[@lonewolf5238]

@@jbalogh01 check out Lenny Bruce. The shit we're dealing with today ain't all that different. It's just propagated much more efficiently.

[@LuckyBaldwin777]

He skipped a good part from the "Chihuahua Pack Attacks Officer." Under that it said, "Angry dogs inflict bite marks to ankle."

[@mp412cutube]

I forgot how funny these were!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@steveonmareisland5268]

If the guy who ran into the DMV building could renew his driver's license before the police arrived, what does that say about police response times???

[@lezorford7155]

This is hysterical...laughing with tears...as I recall doing originally, & I've only seen part 1! Sound quality is annoying, but tolerable, & visual quality leaves something to be desired, but worth putting up with (perhaps the other parts will be better).

[@MightyTimYoung]

Jay made it hysterical!!

[@johncarter5703]

I miss Jay😢

[@alexanderthemeek]

6:25 If there were no planes during civil war, how did the continental army occupy the airports?

[@robertf6344]

Oh Man, some funny stuff in these headlines.

[@MY1BLACKCAT]

hilarious - i couldnt stop laughing

[@richardhamblen5526]

"WORLD FAMOUS 'FLAMING ANUS"..HAHAHAAAAA!!

[@JavierArveloCruzSantana]

Fabulous compilation.

[@JasonSmith-vj1de]

18:56 The founder of Lear Jets actually named his daughter Crystal Shanda Lear.

[@janewilson2421]

Innocent times..

[@carlakinsella3833]

Omg horse trailer I LOVE IT!!! 😊

[@esmereldahipswitch]

Omgosh. Thank you! Hilarious!

[@AndrewVelonis]

FWIW, Lehman's catalogue caters to Amish, Mennonite and Homesteaders. So having an umbrella that has a clear panel you can see through while "driving" would refer to driving horses.

[@MontanaRose406]

I remember when it was weddings, remember the Good Mount wedding?

[@ilyakats54]

Leno is so much funnier that Letterman, it's not even close.

[@skynosaka]

We need Jay today. Too bad the woke mob would probably crucify him. You cant have fun anymore these days. Its sad.

[@embeddedude737]

They're Reefs, Jay. They all have bottle openers.

[@The.Intruder]

04:01 Catering for lost job? Who would have a party for losing their job? 😳

[@ivanleterror9158]

Depends on the job. I'm sure thee are some out there where this would make sense.

[@The.Intruder]

@@ivanleterror9158 Maybe...maybe someone like an executioner...🤔

[@bretthess6376]

I did..... I was fired from a grocery store for refusing to repackage overage fish. Part of the party was in celebration of the Health Department catching them with a dumpster full of ripped open fish packages. Somebody must have turned them in.

[@The.Intruder]

@@bretthess6376 So you were not partying for losing your job but for your ex-employers getting caught by the Health and Safety people.

[@bretthess6376]

@@The.Intruder Rather a bit of both. Sadly, I hated that job, because management were a bunch of a-holes. Seeing them get busted, and knowing I had possibly prevented a lot of people from getting seriously sick from their rotten fish, made me happy.

[@richardhamblen5526]

"GREENLAND METEORITE MAY BE FROM SPACE"..NO SHIT SHERLOCK! HAHAHAAA..

[@John-tc7yp]

Ah, the good old time

[@emptyhand777]

That stiff joints joke should have gotten more laughs.

[@fredhartman1325]

Haven't watched any late night hosts since Leno left. He is so talented and a role model. All the others are disgusting knockoffs.

[@stevebigansky9372]

Agreed - all these other "late night" guys are just a bunch of wannabes-

[@larrysfgfan1]

Leno's headline segments were great entertainment. Why di you think they need editing?

[@eddie3426]

5:41 nice job at trying to scratch out the address jay lol i just street viewed it

[@manicmechanic448]

Ladies and gentlemen, it is now big bwain time.

[@lordbarristertimsh8050]

18:25 - 18:41 had me laughing and laughing for longer than is probably appropriate.

[@AznPhatty]

So now everyone knows Ineeda Bath's address LOL 5:35

[@patsquach4080]

How. Many. YEARS AGO DID JAY DO THIS …. AND. THE AMERICAN EDUCATION SYSTEM… HAS GONE DOWN HILL SO. FAR. THAT MOST AMERICANS CANT SEE WHAT THE PROBLEM IS…..

[@richardhamblen5526]

"I WANT MORE "PEE" CHES, LOL!