Having A Carer In Your 20s [CC]

#LovelyPeopleMerch: bit.ly/LovelyPeopleMerch
This video is for anyone that is interested in getting a carer or becoming one! I'm British and I've consistently had a carer for 13 years now.
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[@Moccashio]

"Sadly, you don't become disabled and get handed a pamphlet" SO.TRUE. Amazing hair as always

[@deeanazaman8871]

True, it's all hit and miss

[@marielawrence8992]

I just wanted to leave a quick note from a carer's point of view, to anyone worried about having a carer; there is nothing that phases an experienced carer, be that cleaning up for you or dealing with all kinds of bodily issues. We just want to make sure that you are living the way that you want to in the most comfortable way. I will help you bathe, do your make up, hoover your house or set up your TV planner so you don't miss your favourite shows, it's no biggie. I know it takes time to get your head around having care needs or needing some assistance, but you'll get there.

[@ps374249]

As someone who works over school breaks as carer, and hasn't been doing it for long, let me add that even inexperienced carers (who are decent at least) also try to be unphased by the bodily issues (personally, I started out from babysitting, so I had experience with very small children, they're super gross) and just want you to be comfortable and help you out.

[@emiliesmith9917]

Lesbian Amazon Sister It’s very nice to hear this!

[@artsyebonyrose]

Thank you for your services and your empathy

[@AnnikaVictoria24]

I recently got a support worker once a week, because YOU made me realise it was even a thing! I am ~so much more independent now!~ & me and my partner have such a better relationship because he’s not caring for me every single day! Thank you, Jessica

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

That is excellent news, I am so happy to read this!! 🌸❤️

[@Victoriascarn]

Omg never thought I would see you on this channel love you Annika 💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

[@withyoctopus]

Annika is in the house. Love your videos!

[@lorelig]

Wow, I didn't expect to see you here! It's cool to know that you have a support worker though, It's nice to see you doing well!

[@ryanandersen-harper7551]

Annika, you and Jessica have actually helped me accept my disabilities so, so much and I really love both of your channels ❤ I'm getting a rollator tomorrow and I don't think I ever would've considered using a mobility aid if it hadn't been for people like you two

[@nataliem7144]

I'm a carer with an agency. Part of the reason I've stuck with this particular company is that I get to stick with my clients. So I see the same people, multiple times a week. It makes such a huge difference. Trust is a huge part of my job, and that doesn't just happen. So having the ability to see my ladies regularly makes it easier for them to get to know and trust in me, Carer Nat. If I may add - immediate mark of a good carer is that they listen to you. Maybe you're not good with physical contact? Ok. Let's find a way to get round that together. Maybe you don't want people in the outside world to know you need care: Ok. Who would you like people to think I am? It's really not working out? That's fine. I really really hope the next person is exactly what you need. Is there anything I can do to make the changeover easier? Also, don't be afraid to say that their appearance isn't quite right. I happily adjust my outfit as the day goes on so I'm uber-professional for one, a friendly-carer for another and a companion-lookalike for another. Heck, I even redo my make-up several times a day on a bumpy bus to help my ladies feel more comfortable around me! A carer that makes you feel like crap, isn't caring. We are literally here to help YOU to do whatever it is YOU want to do, not what I think you should be doing (except if you're bleeding to death etc etc. I'll probably do that without asking permissions). Point being, unless you're about to shuffle off this mortal coil, a carer should adapt to YOU and support you in your ambitions. Be that earning a degree or buying bog roll from the corner shop. Doesn't matter to us, unless it matters to you.

[@MamaMOB]

You’re amazing!!! This world needs more of you!

[@thebookwyrmslair6757]

Wow, you have an amazing attitude! Thank you for sharing from your beautiful perspective!!

[@annieinwonderland]

Yes this need to said yes support worker need care.

[@dorkasaurus.gretch]

This made me cry. I need this kind of care or even the tiniest bit of similar support from SOMEONE in my life. Thank you for what you do!!!

[@starhill6792]

Ahh I read career. But I think this is still an interesting topic.

[@braindeadkumquat]

Me too!

[@lunajinks9872]

Star Shine I reread it 5 times to make sure it wasn’t career. 😂

[@amatakespix]

Star Shine same!! I worked as a caregiver for over 2 years so this was a great surprise 😁

[@lauramatalebot7698]

Same!

[@stonelovecharm7119]

It took me about three passes to realize it was supposed to be "carer!"

[@MrDooom]

I spent the whole video waiting for Clara to slide into frame, because I _knew_ that was going to happen eventually. I was not disappointed :)

[@lilliankarabaic8194]

I spent the rest of the video just thinking CLARA IS OVER THERE.

[@leedent7260]

A good 12th Doctor quote from Doctor Who comes to mind "she's my carer, she cares so I don't have to" and that was about someone called Clara. 😂

[@airohwalker2478]

I totally didn’t catch that and I love Doctor Who! Thank you for sharing 😂💕

[@amberwhittington8991]

As a caregiver myself, I'm glad that you've taken the time to explain what we really do. A LOT of people think we are only for "old folks". Over fifteen years as a caregiver, I have cared for ages 4 to 98.

[@molepole1998]

I'm 21 and I have a 26 year old carer. I love her so much, she's like my crazy aunt and has a similar humour to me. Also, she's the first gay person I've ever had in my life SO I ALSO CAME OUT THANKS TO HER ☺️☺️ Life feels more manageable now which is great! It doesn't matter how low I'm feeling, when she comes to see me (twice a week for 5 hours) I feel so much more, well, like I'm actually here, and not just watching life happen behind glass I had trial and error like most people with carers, a lot of old people who got on my nerves and only knew about how to care for old people. I got given a carer mostly for my mental health than personal or physical so it took a while to find someone familiar with mental illness. I was basically in crisis when I first started, I was a terrible danger to myself, had agoraphobia and terrible depression however was unable to go into mental hospital due to having autism and PTSD. I have one regular career and if she's sick then I have no one else. I only want her! She helps me get out into my local town as well as makes sure I eat, take my meds and acts like a counselor TOO. She's so awesome and I feel like I can literally talk to her about anything! Thanks to her I'm even doing ballet classes which I've always wanted to do but could never have gone alone This is way longer than I wanted it to be and now I'm kinda emotional. But that's my story 🖤🖤🖤

[@polydactilism]

Congrats on finding a great support and living your best life!!!!

[@juliecipolla6732]

Thx so much! I have mental health symptoms and I need a carer. This gives me courage to ask for one.

[@rachelcookie321]

I feel like I probably need a carer. I’m 16 and have autism, anxiety and depression. I rely on my parents for lots of things. I can’t go anywhere by myself because I get so anxious. I really don’t want a carer though. I have this thing were I don’t like when people try to help me or tell me what’s best for me. I just want to do everything by myself and no one else to get involved unless I ask for help. Despite my extreme anxiety I did actually go to Japan on student exchange when I was 14. I was never alone during that trip, I went with other kids from my city and stayed with a host family but the only time I felt anxious during that trip was when I got overwhelmed when trying to pack my stuff to come home again. I just find it interesting that I can’t walk into school alone but I can fly to another country with people I don’t know very well.

[@airohwalker2478]

Thank you for sharing! I think it’s really awesome that you asked for and were able to get the help you needed! Wishing you well 💕

[@sparkybish]

I love your good hair distraction technique.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

😏😉

[@joshuacreel3000]

Oh my God Jessica the Clara cameo had me like full on cackling.

[@danamariesmith8960]

i'm a caregiver in the states! so many people with disabilities have no idea about being eligible to hire a caregiver, so thank you for getting more information about it out there!

[@shalacarter9330]

Danamarie Smith hello! I live in America and I am on disability, so I would love to hear more about what is available for me. Thank you!

[@danamariesmith8960]

hi! it's similar in the way jessica describes in the video. for more information on it you can take a look here: www.aarp.org/caregiving/home-care/info-2018/hiring-caregiver.html

[@annieinwonderland]

For Australians it's Ndis

[@goldilockz6517]

Are you referring to a PCA? (In the US)

[@KrisLenda]

Disabled in university would be a great video. I'm in university right now and I'd like to see the similarities and differences! I have cerebral palsy, so looking after a disabled body is a struggle I know far too well

[@annieinwonderland]

She has done one.. on the channel.

[@Gethazzor3]

Not to delegitimise how you feel however, some organizations use the term service-user because it's a catch all term that doesn't require describing the individual who is access a service. If an organization supports HIV+ people and their families it makes more sense for them just to say 'service-user' instead of 'HIV+ people and those effected by HIV'. It also allows for more anonymity if they aren't public about their status. For some disability groups as well, 'service-user' includes Deaf people who consider being called disabled insulting. Basically its just a simpler term for them to use because not everyone their support is "disabled" or wants to be labelled as such.

[@Eva_R966]

Gethazzor3 that's an interesting note!

[@sebastianjdillingham]

(she is also Deaf)

[@h.m.perdue8358]

Gethazzor3 my mom calls them her clients.

[@hle1606]

My brother is disabled so we had carers in and out of my house my whole life. Honestly it DOES matter so much how they get along with the family. I had never heard anyone else talk about this and I loved hearing your viewpoints! Love your videos Jessica!

[@lisakukla459]

I'm that one person. 🙂 But with my mobility issues, being relatively new to the disability system (a year and a half), and living alone as well as having to navigate it all on my own, I've been considering utilizing these types of services. I've also only just recently realized that I have Autism at the age of 38 (but oh boy, does that explain a lot!), and I'm realizing that a thing I've really struggled with on and off my whole life actually has a name - executive function - and that I could probably get a lot of relief in that regard from someone dropping in every couple of days to help keep me on track, or help me catch up. My physical issues are episodic, and I'm not strictly homebound, so I feel weird about having a carer. Embarrassed, ashamed, foolish? I can't really articulate what exactly the hang-up is. I'm sure the universal stigma of being a drain on society, being lazy, exploiting the government (they can't be serious about this one, can they?), boondoggling, etc., that goes along with people who have disabilities or Autism isn't easily shaken off, either. After having watched this video, though, I'm realizing it's pretty silly that I haven't even called the phone number to so much as find out what it's really like and how it all works before deciding it's not appropriate for me. I shall make that a goal for Monday. They really should provide you an advocate once your disability claim is approved. I'm sure there's many programs out there that I qualify for and would benefit from that I have no idea about. Thousands of other people as well. I feel like that's by design. 😒 Thank you for going over this topic. It's given me the nudge I needed, and will hopefully lead to a slightly easier and more fulfilling daily experience. That sounds lovely.

[@juliecipolla6732]

boy do i identify! thx for articulating it so clearly!

[@frentbow]

If in the UK request Advocacy from local authority social services or Google Advocacy +your area. I've just had a care needs assessment now I'm confused so I'm going to request Advocacy to help me understand. Good luck

[@cindygiesbrecht3146]

In Canada we call them 'health care worker/aids' or just and 'aid' or 'worker'. Usually I see them often at the gym with special needs people (a blind man, a girl with Downs, etc). I was thinking it's a miracle you didn't die in colllege! What if you had fallen face first in your vomit and then passed out? I'm so glad you're doing so well these days! Your will power is amazing.

[@YeetusTheFetus]

Idk where in Canada you are but in Toronto we also call them PSWs (personal support worker)

[@justinamoniz]

I find your thoughts on the term "service user" really interesting! I work with people who have experienced domestic or sexual violence and I started using the term "service user" because I didn't want to constantly being referring to everyone as "victims". Language is so important and this was a nice reminder of that.

[@OliverLamWatson]

I read Career also ah, but it tickled me when you addressed it in the intro haha , Awesome vid x

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Glad you stayed! ha ha xx

[@gorillaau]

It made me scroll up back to the title.. and yep. I had misread it also.

[@maureenzieber1523]

Clara “hola!” I CRACKED up. 😂

[@clairej81]

This has helped me massively. Being young and disabled is hard no one seems to think you need help and will just get on with it.

[@Dr3Mc3Ninja]

My friend became a carer and they are only allowed to spend half an hour with the clients. It is below minimum wage and they are given hardly any time to allow for travel between client houses. She was waiting for a client to let her into this residential building for the elderly and she was outside like 20 minutes and then she got chewed for, "being late" when it was a client who wouldn't open the door for her. Whole thing is such a mess.

[@ecologist_to_be]

DrGrukar McNinjaSixthGun depends on who you work for as you can have anything from 15 minutes a day to 24 hours a day!

[@ellizpicetti]

Yeah, I am a care giver and this is pretty accurate.

[@jaet4540]

How can she be paid less that minimum wage? Minimum wage is a legal requirement, anything less is illegal

[@shinynickel05]

It'd be a massive HIPAA violation to ask details, and please don't give them, but I feel like I worked for exactly that client before when I was still a carer. Her landline phone was also connected to the door buzzer, so I had to dial in, but she'd be on the phone forever despite knowing I was coming back from grocery shopping, so I would be unable to reach her and get stuck outside with her frozen food in 90 degree (30-something Celsius) heat. Then she'd yell at me once I actually managed to get inside (by following other peoples' carers into the building) for not waiting to be buzzed in. I quit that gig after a couple weeks. It was AWFUL. I went on to have many amazing, wonderful clients whom I totally clicked with, so I guess the lesson there is, if the system where you are allows you to get out of a bad situation, get out ASAP. Keep searching until you find the right clients for you. I spent five years as a carer and, after switching careers to office management, even took on a part time caring gig again on the side for the past year and a half.

[@anyawillowfan]

I have a care agency and the carers are treated awfully by management for sub-par pay and unreliable hours (many complain of too many hours when others are complaining of not enough). Unfortunately the only way for them to be paid more would be to charge the clients more, when most of us cannot afford it (I'm lucky to get government money but if I were able to get PIP most of it would go straight to the care agency). Working as a private carer or PA is usually slightly better paid (as well as giving you more control over what you do and who you care for) as everything except tax and insurance goes to the carer rather than a company. That said, I am someone who needs care agencies as most private carers aren't able/willing to only come round for 30 minutes twice a day.

[@clarissagarvey7080]

"Sadly you don't become disabled and get handed a pamphlet on all of the wonderful services you can now use." This hit so hard for me! It's frustrating to have to figure this out yourself. I wish doctors were better at helping with this when you get diagnosed.

[@znyznyzny]

am I the only one that read carer correctly? 😆

[@Lasarah01]

🙋🏼

[@spacemonkey340]

I did, too.

[@heiditrampedach2084]

Me three 😁

[@manuelbonet]

I clicked precisely because it said _carer_

[@unicorn1655]

Probably

[@Diamond123682]

I saw "career" at first glance, but then I read it correctly and, honestly, got even more interested. Also, leave this to the fact that I'm still kinda new here, but I didn't know that about Clara! I thought she was just a *really* good friend.

[@charlottemaclean204]

As a carer I feel very shocked at the treatment you had received, I worked with a company and we had teams with a few service users per team that we cared for. That way the individual had the proper care and we knew everything that they needed, I loved it and we had great bonds, I'm glad that Clara is your carer xx

[@haileyparlette8083]

I have been a caregiver (until may of this year) for over a decade. It was really interesting to hear from some one who recieves care. I mostly worked with dementia so my residents couldn't exactly relay their personal experience. I started watching your channel because I am now dealing with chronic pain and mobility issues myself. Still waiting on a diagnosis. Thankfully I can still handle my ADL's though my house is a mess and I wash my hair as infrequently as I can. 😊 💖💕

[@tk2557]

"who you don't really care about seeing you naked as long as they stop the pain" could not stop crying at this

[@shesaysdisco5279]

Clara’s hair is absolutely gorgeous! I love that color on her, especially with the lip color! I’m so glad you make videos like these. I’m not disabled, and no one in my immediate family is either, so I always learn a lot from you. Also, your positivity is really uplifting and I appreciate it so much! I have pretty severe depression and anxiety, but you never fail to cheer me up at least a little. Much love from the US! ❤️

[@juliecipolla6732]

i have depression, anxirty and ptsd. i am disabled bec of it. i learned there is a whole community of fellow disabled people out there who have such strong spirits and who are amazing like me!

[@leaho3789]

Those pearls look stunning on you!

[@elizabethrobertson2699]

I am an HCA or a ‘carer’ and working on my CNA and I want to say a huge thank you! There is such a stigma around both needing the help and providing the help. The more we talk about it the less of a stigma there is!

[@ClaireRousseau]

Oh, I'm glad you're making another video with Clara. It was fun to see her pop in but I was like 'what? but I want more Clara!'. Don't think I can make the stream live but I'll look forward to catching it afterwards.

[@sakaradee]

Claire Rousseau I thought that too! And glad it will be avalible after the event :")

[@JixieDye]

Oh goshy gosh I have been through so much of what you've talked about. I used to have an agency and I hated it for two specific reasons 1, because they never told me what time they would turn up, they just expected me to wait in all day for them and 2, because I hated not knowing who was going to come. Some of the carers I had were complete disasters, like the polish woman who got upset because I didn't have any dairy free milk for her tea in the house and said 'fine if you want me to drink this and get ill then I will' and the woman who literally reached across to my plate mid lunch and stole half my sandwiches even though I'd asked her if she wanted me to buy her a sandwich and she insisted that she didn't and then stole mine. There was also the carer that was verbally abusive and called me a 'bell end' or rather screamed it at me. Now I have 2 personal assistants or PA's as I call them and they are fabulous. They're actually cousins. I met the first one when she covered for another PA I had at the time and I just kept her on because she's awesome and the second one is actually the first one's cousin who came round one day just randomly and then we hit it off like crazy. Now I love them because they boss me about a lot when I forget to do things. I have sight issues and ADHD as well as other mental illnesses so I often get distracted or forget things and they keep my brain on task which I love.

[@JixieDye]

Also Jessica I would totally love to collaborate and do a video together. I know that might sound crazy but hey if you don't ask you don't know right?

[@xXCiciliaXx]

I'm a certified nurse aide in Michigan! Being a carer is difficult but also rewarding. I'm glad that you have a great carer and a great wife to help you.

[@EmilyBrown-ql9mf]

I’m now a career with a girl who is like one of my best friends we have such a laugh and amazing adventures..we use the title of buddy rather than career or PA it fits our relationship best

[@drcloudy]

. . . . I have had this video in my recommended at least twenty times. Literally every time I thought it said "Having a CAREER in your 20s" and so I didn't click it because that topic doesn't interest me. Holy crap.

[@foxclouds]

Absolutely love this video. I have been wondering about the carers in your life. Thank for being so open about it. I also laughed when Clara appeared in the frame 🤣 I would like to know what Clara had to learn to assist you and how she manages to work with you, be your friend and deal with anxiety. You are so lovely! Thank you for your videos!!

[@wheelie26]

I can’t stand agency carers, you never know who is going to turn up and when you think you know who’s coming they change it at last minute then there are the carers who you don’t get on with, only once I rang an agency to ask that a person not come to the house again but she still turned up for the next two days despite more phone calls. I have now decided to go down the direct payments route and hope that I can find someone as cool as Clara.

[@strawberrysyrup13]

Very off topic! But vintage style suits you so well I CANNOT imagine you in any other clothing/style :) you are absolutely a dream ♥️

[@Lov3E15]

My dad is a quadriplegic and getting a good carer for him is impossible! The government won’t give us money because he was injured in a car accident, car insurance only provides 7hrs a day (for a guy who needs 24hr care) and all the extra care needs are expected to be covered by his family (all expect his wife to help out but she passed in the accident and all his kids are less than 25yo and most busy in university). The past year has been too hard dealing with getting him adequate coverage.

[@sarahwithstars]

I lasted 42 seconds lipreading today. I do love that your annunciated conjunctions are clear...I spotted your 'hence' a mile off. Xxxx edit2: at 42secs I realised I needed every word of content and put the sound back on! Edit: holy shiz, I started uni 12weeks after spinal fusion. Because I was off Fentanyl and SO much better than just before my surgery but I was not ready for. My mum drove 300mile round trip every 10days to do all my laundry, shopping, take my library books back to the library 300m away and get new books and collect everything I had ordered online from the post room that was less than 10minute walk away from my room but I couldn't carry! That was a fun term....

[@triciarose389]

sarahwithstars // I suck at lip-reading, so I only lasted like ..... 0 seconds. 😬😂

[@diamondsxd7765]

I just tried and I lasted about 9 and then was lost, so good job.:)

[@shalacarter9330]

Your mother should be sainted!

[@daphnelecesne2618]

Wonderful, wonderful mom. Why does no one want to go to college locally, so to be close to the people who care?

[@EveryDayALittleDeath]

I've only had a carer breifly, after I'd had severe pneumonia and became severely deconditioned due to spending weeks in a hospital bed but I still found this video extremely relatable. My condition also follows no schedule and doesn't give a crap what my plans are. Also college/uni being extremely difficult due to health problems (though in my case it was the commute that killed me, as under my disability classification, I could only be a part-time student) This is as good a video as any to tell you how much you mean to me Jessica. I suffer from depression and anxiety as well as chronic physical illness and seeing another disabled lesbian being so happy and in love and successful gives me hope that I can get there too one day. Thank you so, so much.

[@prosethorns]

"I'm just a ... giant." Subscribed. I'm 6 ft tall. Let's be friends together with interesting hair and problems we tidy away.

[@clarienne7583]

Hi, I'm 6'6" and do historical swordfighting as a hobby. 😅 Can I join the giants club?

[@DresdenShuffle]

I'm a carer. Have been since I was 16 and I'm 30 now. I care for my mother who has multiple debilitating mental illnesses (from abuse as a child and genetic predisposition) Life hasn't been easy because of my job. It's a full time job and it can be very full on, especially with someone who has mental illnesses. She's getting more independent now thanks to outside help which gives me a break every now and then.

[@ZairaBandy]

and who pays you?

[@ekl1457]

I was a PA for a child with ASD and adored it but loved seeing your take as an adult. So interesting and very educational.

[@melissas4226]

I also read career and just stayed for the whole thing, it was super interesting

[@plursocks]

I have a carer that comes in once a week just to help me get organized. My brain just cannot keep things organized and I get overwhelmed and don't know where to start when it comes to cleaning or find myself unable to stay focused on the task at hand. For a long time, I felt like I wasn't "disabled enough" to have a carer, even though I knew I would benefit greatly from having someone clean alongside me because I can't really do it by myself...and I was really embarrassed at my inability to clean and didn't want someone to judge me for the mess. But I've had nothing but positive experiences from my carer (though there's a lot of paperwork in the beginning which was kinda overwhelming). So ADHD folks, if cleaning makes you overwhelmed and you need help...just get a carer. It has really made a huge difference in my life.

[@thedukeofweasels6870]

I relate to this I don't have a care worker but I do get nurse visits to bandage in chronic wounds and having someone with the right personality makes a huge difference I've had people that I couldn't stand I know they're gonna do everything wrong and it's not even worth explaining to them because we're just not on the same page. Luckily there's this one nurse I've had that is absolutely amazing and I consider her a good friend she's put so much work in there she's nice and pleasant and makes the experience as pleasant as possible. She even followed me when I moved across town despite the fact I'm now in a district she doesn't normally cover. Having someone that takes the time to listen to you and do what's necessary to relieve your pain even if it's not the conventional standard is so important when trying to live with any kind of illness.

[@Mobile_Dom]

having been a carer and having a degree in it (huzzah) I also despise the term Service user. just seems so clinical in an inherently personal profession

[@shinynickel05]

When talking about the job with friends, I'd always refer to them as my clients, but on the job, I generally just let each person choose how they wanted to be referred to and what they wanted to call me. If someone's new to the system and wants to just introduce me as their friend or helpful neighbor because they're struggling to come to terms with a change in independence level, that's totally cool. If they want to stick to professional terms to reinforce professional boundaries, also totally cool. But, yeah, service user is a really weird, needlessly obtuse, vague, and distant term. No one actually ever opted for that.

[@brookepeters-pleasant4589]

We use the term "participant" here in Australia & I'm a Support Worker

[@LecheVitrineUK]

We have direct payments for my daughter through an agency because I can't deal with paperwork. I'm autistic ADHD and other issues my doctor says I should have a p.a. But then the government took away my PIP and said that I wasn't autistic and they completely traumatized me. thank you for doing this video x

[@HeyItsZee_]

Laura Jaine that is awful! Im,sorry

[@GeorginasJourney]

Yes! I’d love to see a university experience video! I’m starting in September & am so excited but also so nervous about how I’ll manage uni with a disability 😬

[@LesleyMLK]

Georgina's Journey I would love to know too! Thanks Jessica for this video 😊

[@GeorginasJourney]

LesleyMichelle2000 good luck if you’re going to uni with an illness/disability too!

[@LesleyMLK]

Georgina's Journey Unfortunately I will not be able to got to uni next year because of my ME/CFS, but hopefully the year after. In the meantime I'll be following your uni journey. That is if you're going to continue your channel... 😊❤️

[@GeorginasJourney]

LesleyMichelle2000 taking time out to focus on rest and healing is really beneficial in the long run! I took two years out and am so glad I did as I’m so much better at managing my symptoms now and knowing my limits (and you will too in time 😊). Thank you! I’m hoping to keep my channel going and show what life is like at university with chronic illnesses, as well as giving tips as I discover them along the way :)

[@abinamikaze]

Get as much help with uni as you can! I'm going into year 3 with more conditions than skittle flavours, and It's been easier than I thought it would be. Pacing and good support network is key (as well as staying at home!). Also get DSA ASAP!

[@vikingqueenmaddy2754]

I have ehlers danlos syndrome, chronic pain, crohn's disease, chronic migraines and more. I'm 29 and have used a walking stick for the past 11 years, a wheelchair on serious days for the past 6 years. I used to be so embarrassed about my disabilities and my equipment but then I found your channel. Thank you so much for letting people see us as normal 🖤

[@BlinkPopShift]

My husband provides most of the care I need when I am stuck with long migraines and also functions as semi replacement for my lost long term memory. I'm trying with my most recent video series to use technology to take on the lost memory functions but the physical needs are still his job. Getting a carer in the US is out of my budget and because we have insurance instead of NHS they will go to the ends of the earth to not pay for things. I'd love to hear from Clara about what she does everyday and how she learned and feels about the job.

[@ellawhomersley4340]

Ooh as someone becoming increasingly disabled whilst at the first year of uni I'd very much appreciate your disabled at uni video!

[@lowrishepherd434]

I became physically disabled at 22 and it was only through the biggest coincidence that my dad was retiring from teaching so luckily he was able to be my career, I also have a fantastic fiancé who I’d been with since I was 19 so it’s very lucky that I can have the help that I need but as my dad is getting older I do worry about how much he’ll be able to care for me in the future and I also want him to be able to have the breaks he needs as well, this is exactly the video I needed right now because I had no idea how to go about getting another carer who isn’t a family member or friend, will have to look into all of this, also my fiancé has a full time job so he can’t be my carer but he helps me to shower and things like that when I need it, I completely get where you’re coming from though about being young and disabled and not wanting to draw attention to yourself! It’s something that a lot of people struggle with but no one ever talks about so thank you for a very refreshing video xxx

[@emmawhitworth1679]

This is super super informative! Thank you for making this - I feel like I've learned more in the last 20 mins than I have in a week of KZbin!

[@Mush27]

I have worked in the care industry for the last 12 years, and you are totally right, no one ever really knows what is available to them (especially direct payments). I have worked as a manager of Domicilary care for the last 5 years with several companies and the experience will depend on how Person centred the Company is and also how flexible they can be (previous company we would go above and beyond to support someone How and when they needed it). Im so pleased that you made this video to show its not an embarassing thing to need help!

[@Kati-fy7uj]

Hi Jessica Would it be possible for you to make a video on sign language interpreters as I am studying to be one Thanks Love your videos

[@HAngeli]

Krazie kat I'm also interested in that!

[@nataliem7144]

Tip: get out into the deaf community as much as possible (to practice, and also to get to know the people who will likely be hiring you) and keep studying as much as you can. There's a huge difference between a level 2 communicator who isn't quite confident yet, and a level 6 who has decades of practice, but you'll get there :)

[@ysabellap.6282]

I read it right and I’ve wanted to learn about this for a long time, thank you for making a video speaking so openly about this!

[@jojo.joanna]

I'm learning so much from your channel -- thank you! I appreciate the amount of effort that must go into articulating all these thoughts 💚

[@malliaher7071]

How long has Clara been your caretaker? What is Clara's work schedule like? Also, do you have to supplement her pay since you mentioned that direct pay lacks proper funding?

[@TexBirdie]

I would love to see that video about being disabled in university! I learned bad self care habits during that time that took me years to overcome- I wish I knew someone with first hand experience to caution me before

[@chloep.2498]

I came expecting a video on having a career and stayed till the end!! This is only your second video I've seen but I definitely want more :)

[@veronicawilson7594]

Stunningly articulated message. Very important!

[@Carolynbearolyn]

Yep, brain totally read “career” 😂. I actually work as a carer in an assisted living facility here in the States, so this was a wonderful topic!

[@200yearsago]

I'd been avoiding this video because I kept reading career and thought it'd make me feel bad for being in my twenties and unable to do fuck all but I'm glad I finally watched it. :)

[@Ouchiness]

Hi! I really appreciate that all of your videos are subtitled.

[@illiwd]

I found your channel recently, and I think you're lovely. I feel so informed after watching ones like this. Also, I totally thought this was a career video.

[@zweij]

You look stunning! Your hair is mesmerising gurl.....! Im gonna sub, your storytelling skills are awesome!

[@ams23ish]

definitely please do a video with Clara, she looks really cool!

[@MadamePastisset]

Anna Styr she is! 😀

[@TheSightOfTheStars]

Jessica, your dress is gorgeous! It looks absolutely amazing on you! SO cute!

[@marielismuniz2929]

Very informative and I love how you told backstories for each caretaker

[@janinarautio-visuri8757]

i also read ’career’ but your fabulous hair hypnotized me to stay and watch the whole video

[@Sophie-vl8wp]

new video!! best part of my week 💖💖💖 you're a wonderful lady and i adore you!

[@TheRandomExplorer]

I had no idea about half of this, thank you so much for making this insightful video!

[@lynnhobby32321]

I love your videos for several reasons. Learning about others, your accent, and you’re just so dang intriguing and funny. ❤️

[@theannieelainey]

This was amazing! Thank you for sharing!! I would love to be able to hire a carer, have to look into it ❤

[@o0Avalon0o]

I LOVE how amazing your videos are. I barely read the title because I always click on it anyway, haha!

[@Sarahle3]

Thank you for providing a window into your life. I love that KZbin can be a platform for glimpsing the lives of all sorts of different people with different experiences. I appreciate your charm and your candor!

[@TheIrishAlchemist205]

Having done this for 7 years myself, I still found this fun and informative - thanks for sharing your perspective Jessica! Definitely good advice I'll have to pass along to some students of mine as well.

[@piscesgagamonster]

man, you talking about your time university almost made me cry. Im glad it got better at least

[@AmyChou]

This is off topic but Clara’s hair is absolutely gorgeous!!

[@thebriarfox5798]

I read it as career, but I found your video was so interesting I couldn't stop watching. Also your hair is marvellous.

[@b.scorpio5316]

Arrived on that video because I read ''career''. Stayed because the topic was fascinating (and you're such a beauty !) Lots of love

[@Eva-dy9qy]

Lovely and super informative video even for someone who has no direct experience on caring - also ARE THOSE FISHES ON YOUR DRESS I love it

[@rebeccawiens4224]

I read career, but I'm subscribed to you so I know better. I'm so sorry that you had such awful experiences in the past. I'm also glad that you have Clara with you now. Having someone take care of you is no shame. I hope that this video will help other people out there who could benefit from having a carer.

[@elizabethtims8453]

I love love love just listening to you. You would be an amazing narrator.

[@fynefilms]

You are such a trooper and there’s just something about you that is mesmerising! You completely sparkle! An absolute inspiration to all, thank you so much for sharing your story with us. Love and kind wishes to you!

[@impanduhhh6860]

Please make the Uni video, I plan on going to Sussex university but any first hand information about being disabled and studying would be amazing! also anything about being disabled in brighton would be lovely!

[@nuclear_barhe]

You're so awesome and inspiring! 😁

[@alexblack4048]

I read the title twice and i read carer as career both times. Also the video is very informative and i swear youre like officially my favorite youtuber to watch right now! 😄

[@jensmith5677]

I absolutely LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE!! you have fantastic story telling abilities and I hope and pray for you to write something! A book, a blog, something bc you paint the best pictures with your words😘 Thank you. Your videos are helping me deal with the sudden loss of my partner. Much blessings and love to you, and Claudia!

[@N7Biotic]

great video. I have a genetic condition which has definitely got worst in age. I'm in my mid-20s and feel like someone much older, as I have very bad mobility problems now. This video has opened my eyes, that there is help for anyone. I want to live independently very soon. so I might look into the caring system.

[@motherhoodandmentalhealth3522]

Hi! Love your channel!

[@thewheelme]

One of my subscribers suggested this video, and all I can say is WOW! This is the first video I have. watched that someone has gone through basically the same thing regarding carers and all of the "adventures" shall we say of finding the right person. thank you. so much for putting my. frustrations into words, and so beautifully :-)

[@kandiceh7849]

I love Clara’s hair! Adorable when she pops in to say “hola!” Very interesting video Jess!

[@simv_]

I'm going to use "happy as Larry" from now on, its such a great phrase!

[@simv_]

"SHE BOSSED ME AROUND LIKE NO TOMORROW" PAULINE SOUNDS LIKE A MFING BOSS CAN I HAVE ONE OF HER

[@PhoebeFayRuthLouise]

I have always thought your friendship with Clara is amazingly wonderful! I love her hair the color it is now! Looking forward to Sunday’s video! I would like to know (1)whether it was you or Clara who had the idea for her to be your carer and (2)how that first conversation about it happened!

[@chloe6588]

This video has been in my recommended for two days and I read it as Career and so was really confused but your style intrigued me and now I've been educated so thanks!

[@ashleysakus3137]

Awesome video! I don't know anyone else that has a carer and young so nice to see your experience!