JIm Gaffigan - Mr. Universe - "McDonald's"

[@Pepperoni10125]

Ten days before my tenth birthday I was diagnosed with blood cancer, my parents downloaded Jim Gaffigan onto my iPod, listening to him multiple times a day made the trial much more bearable, it was a 3 and a half year procedure, I listened to Jim Gaffigan most of the days, the cancer is now gone and I'm done with my treatments. I'm now almost 14 years old and I will never forget how much Jim Gaffigan helped my mental state.

[@daedricjon1169]

+Fluffy Cat Good to hear you're doing better :D

[@markhollas7585]

+Fluffy Cat Could we say that maybe Jim Gaffigan is a cure for cancer? Joking aside, good on you for getting through something like that

[@jamest7500]

+Fluffy Cat humour is the best medicene

[@rockinrodney5000]

+Fluffy Cat Right on mate! Kickin' disease in the arse while kickin' back listenin' to some good standup.

[@Nestor123057]

+Fluffy Cat I Love you Fluffy Cat. Live long and prosper.

[@MattKittredge2112]

Only Jim could do a 9-minute bit on McDonald's, and every minute of it is hilarious, lol

[@kellygervais3440]

He is simply the best... been loving him since pale force from conan o'brien...

[@CrystalMouse1]

matt k he reminds me of little thoughts we have but forgot about...till now

[@ripley3647]

And like 3-4 minutes of that was about the fries 🤤🍟🤤 Thise are literally the best things on earth

[@jessstuart7495]

I'm Lovin It.

[@geoffdearth7360]

Everyone knows what he means about the "bonus fry".

[@MartyMcFly88]

that whispering voice he does is great

[@shauneallen2739]

Kathleen Madigan

[@Jangofat1]

Marty? That you?? 🤭

[@JNSStudios]

You’re the voice inside my head!!!

[@coconutz870]

Hot pockets

[@111highgh]

I gotta get back in time.

[@ThrashMetallix]

Jim Gaffigan has quickly become one of my favorite comedians around. I absolutely love how he does his comedy. He doesn't rely on race, sexual humor, or constant profanity. He just tells it like it is, even if it makes him look like a fool. Probably one of the biggest strengths to comedy is not being afraid to humiliate yourself.

[@mrs90s]

Should look up Tim Hawkins if you love this guy. Look up "Tim Hawkins fast food" he's hilarious

[@jaccuse4086]

I completely agree. Gaffigan for the win!

[@twoface2001]

The main reason he's really funny is he uses everyday things and makes them funny

[@sivad1025]

He and Brian Regan are two of way too few comedians to understand humour is what you can relate to.

[@akw9875]

+Travis Linton Right on.

[@uirehuigedkahds]

"Has your mom ever made anything as good as a McDonald's fry? Not even close." LOL

[@chelyferrer8834]

Ikr!!! 😂

[@beatzdyer]

Wow some moms just don't know how too cook

[@sofiafirst7661]

Hilarious 😂😂

[@marioiacolucci]

Wook Sound they have great fries!

[@marioiacolucci]

Wook Sound true not even close!

[@schmittenhammer]

Not that I am offended easily, but Mr. Gaffigan is one of the few comedians that makes me laugh out loud without dropping profanity every other word.

[@meggiem100]

One of the reasons I love Ellen DeGenerres is she doesn't do dirty or profane humor.

[@DamonCorbin]

JG is playing at the local amphitheater, don't' know why I haven't bought tickets.

[@Navonoders]

That's exactly why he is so likable. Every comedian these days feels the need to use profanity and vulgarity (especially women for vulgarity, they talk about sex a lot because they think that is the only appealing genre of jokes to men, which is dead wrong). Jim just carries on, talking about how fat he is and it's hilarious!

[@crzzymnn911]

wolfgang schmittenhammer Check out Brian Regen if you haven't already. Same type of comedy and equally hilarious.

[@ChaosBahamut]

+wolfgang schmittenhammer Which makes the profanity he does use that much more effective and hilarious.

[@Vincek88]

"It's all McDonalds" sums it up perfectly!

[@nikicee92]

"I'm just meeting a hooker, I'm certainly not eating here." 🤣

[@YaoEspirito]

"He should be here by now..."

[@TheOriginalDarkGlitch]

@@YaoEspirito 😂😂😂

[@jasonsanders222]

Easily one of the funniest comedians of the new era!! Every one of his specials makes me split my sides all the way through. And I love that voice that he does that mimics what the average audience member would say.

[@1humanonthe3rdrock]

That second voice of audience member KILLS ME! Hilarious! I'm just sitting waiting for him to throw it in!

[@GunGlutton]

I just found a bonus cheeseburger in the bottom of the mcdonalds bag! Jesus must really love me

[@1humanonthe3rdrock]

It truly is a miracle. LOL!!

[@lucasr2050]

I found a bonus meal inside my mcdonald's bag!

[@brookestenzel6952]

Lol

[@heyimjoshnicetomeetya]

@@lucasr2050 Lucky bastard. I never get that. It's why I order two large Quarter Pounder meals

[@ieatgremlins]

You better go to church

[@JosieOuiri]

Gaffigan is underrated. He genuinely makes me belly laugh like no one else. So on target....

[@KkBo15]

He's not underated, where have you been, He's a beloved and hysterical!

[@KkBo15]

Comedian, I left that out. LOL!

[@actiniteviewer]

My favorite line of comedy:"You eat at McDonald's? I didn't know I was better than you!" 🤣🤣🤣

[@scottmacdonald5592]

Gaffigan is one of the top 5 comics on earth. Great delivery

[@takayama8060]

You can smell their fries from half a mile away in your car. I think they do that on purpose.

[@grouchygrundle]

If I'm hungry enough I can smell food even when there isnt anything even close.

[@starisesun7692]

Smells like grease

[@ryanb2547]

@@grouchygrundle I've done the same.

[@RosieWilliamOlivia]

They do indeed! They have chemicals in the fries that taste and smell incredible, I watched some documentary or other on it. Clever and very successful!

[@lizzieketo6318]

Takayama and the smell lasts FOREVER!

[@crummybagpipe6996]

Best comedian EVER... brightens my day every time! Thanks, Jim!!!

[@meroaatighar2644]

This guy is hilarious. He looks funny, acts funny and talks funny. True comedian. I am fan.

[@YaelleG]

Nine minutes. NINE MINUTES on the topic of McDonald’s. Jim Gaffigan is a national treasure.

[@Pscyllehr]

Just found this guy today. Already love him! Cried fork laughing ! Amazing!

[@Pscyllehr]

From*

[@KyleRoberts22]

Fork to From thats one hell of a fuck up lmao

[@tbrowntracyj]

i did the same

[@rhondakreske4851]

Same

[@CJW0056]

You're gonna burn soooo many calories from laughing if you watch all of his specials

[@markmartin5765]

The best comedian ever,If I hear any of his acts again, i still laugh at them like I heard them the first time.I hope to see him in an act one day.

[@TheNightWatcher1385]

At Five Guys Burgers the bonus fry is company policy. They make your meal and then dump even more fries into the bag before they hand it to you. lol

[@emmaknightley]

SERIOUSLY I THOUGHT I JUST GOT LUCKY EVERY TIME

[@WagnerBros]

Yeah it's awesome

[@alphatrion4365]

The Night Watcher did you really just compare those deep fries at five guys to McDonald's fries. you crazy. McDonalds fries have crack sprinkled on em

[@JT-gg6kc]

Nickoli Lion Their fries are always soggy and half cooked.

[@tacoheadmakenzie9311]

That's what real fries are like.

[@limeyosu2000]

This guy is spot on, and very funny too!

[@thecomicbookintroduction600]

H

[@111highgh]

I'm Cosmo, Jerry. Cosmo Kramer.

[@infomercialguy]

I love this guy so much. Thanks Jim!!! Brilliant. So enjoyable. And, I appreciate that you keep it clean and don't find a need to swear all the time. Even my kids can enjoy you - without me being embarrassed or ashamed. I appreciate it immensely. Anyone can swear. Swearing is easy. It takes a smart person who is "secure" in themselves to refrain from swearing. Bravo

[@ShutTheMuckUp]

What an arrogant prick you are to think that not using certain words somehow makes you smarter... Fucking idiot.

[@branon6565]

Let's hope in the 4 years since leaving that fucking ignorant comment, you've removed your head from your ass, cuz it was fuckin buried far enough up there you could probably see your own heart beating....

[@Aidenblazer]

Shut The Muck Up His wording wasn’t amazing, but I guess he’s just trying to say that Gaffigan’s mannerism differentiates himself from hot garbage such as Amy Schumer and Kevin Hart and that he appreciates that. Modern “good” mainstream comedians aren’t amazing, but there are some good ones and Gaffigan is one for sure.

[@chuckwilson6968]

Jim Gaffigan has become my favorite comedian. Just tells it like it is, never offending people. Always makes fun of himself too. That's true comedy.

[@giannanaratil5946]

After watching it like 5 times, you would want McDonald's so bad.

[@samkinison2375]

Actually made me realize how much I hate eating there

[@KkBo15]

Only french fries.

[@mattyc.9332]

Nah. I'm done w/ McDonalds...🤣

[@debbie541]

sheep forevers12: NEVER

[@Zyk0th]

I am literally eating a Quarter Pounder with cheese as I watch this. That's why I came to this video actually.

[@BigstickNick]

+VokunKendovJosh was it worth the experience?

[@Zyk0th]

It was cool to hear him mention the exact meal I got, but other than that, there was nothing special.

[@WTK55]

+VokunKendovJosh You must of not gotten enough fries then.

[@fnnnbbchjdfxh4030]

+Skull Video .nppphytq ps ed

[@swordslinger2269]

thewolrab u from France?

[@kickyerass]

Jim is one of the few, last great true comics today. He doesn't swear and he doesn't have the desperate NEED to be "edgy" by going off on controversial topics - just to get you in your "snarky place" (putting others down). He's a "re-found" Christian (was an atheist for many years), and he doesn't go political - slamming this guy, or side... ever. Now THAT is more brave and honest; actually just being FUNNY!!

[@DaveyMurray1]

kickyerass While he is funny. It's irrelevant that he's a "re-found christian"

[@dronecar]

***** Maybe so, but they can't force people out of an already made marriage now can they? Plus it's been added as part of an amendment if I remember right, therefore it would take a lot of hoops, much more than worth it, to undo. The president does not have the power to randomly wipe amendments off the bill of rights.

[@mujona419]

You think that people are gonna be happy with that? It'd just piss people off and then they'd have to bring it back.

[@mujona419]

***** And do you know why? 'Cause you're arrogant as shit.

[@wendiwatson8742]

That's so true "kickyerass". Lol

[@denverSkip]

You sir, are the funniest man IN.THE.UNIVERSE.

[@Calbenmike]

Sebastian Maniscalco.

[@tedmulthauf3867]

He has the best delivery in the Universe. His wife (writer) is the funniest person.

[@Kemonokami]

...What's this, a library? Guess I'll upvote this while I'm here....

[@lindafitzpatrick7427]

Best Comedian around! Thank you Jim Gaffigan for sharing your sense of humor with all of us and not taking life so seriously. You're amazing!

[@j3161usadkg]

That fry bit truly describes anybody who has ever been to a mcdonalds. He even got the straw paper bit! How many times have I went looking for the lost fry only to find wondering around at the bottom of the bag, "one more! Score!"

[@Marshmallow_Trees]

The McDonalds Denial. So well put.

[@allys744]

“We don’t even know where the meat comes from! That’s DISGUSTING! Yeah, I’ll have a Big Mac...” 😂

[@whoisshe7124]

"BONUS FRIE, YOU GET YOUR OWN KETCHUP PACKET" 😂

[@cesarcueto1995]

Oh I get it

[@anandmg]

I have watched this McDonald's piece umpteen number of times and makes me laugh everytime. Just now bought the Mr Universe as a thanks to Mr Jim!

[@nickzav]

"McDonalds of the soul" - shit had me dying 😂😂😂

[@mattplona7927]

"Everyone worships something" -Timothy Keller "Everyone has a McDonald's" -Jim Gaffigan

[@michaelverdugo3968]

X = Z

[@christianone6611]

"Thou shalt have no other gods before me" God

[@grantschade2072]

He is spitting facts when he says everyone has there own version of McDonald’s

[@Amnesiumm]

omg the "bonus fry" best mistake ever

[@markwilson7487]

Jim's delivery is incredible. He's one of the best to ever do it.

[@johnpiotrowski3108]

Jim, you make me laugh the most over any other comedian. I love your routines and subjects, they're the best.

[@elenarodriguez922]

Right now I'm eating McDonald's fries (including the bonus fries! :D).

[@EpsilonA789]

My boyfriend introduced me to this guy a few days ago. This guy is so funny! XD

[@Nestor123057]

My mother loved McDonald's fries. Whenever we were out together she would always ask for some. Never understood the allure, until now. God Bless her soul.

[@Sterls_yt]

"That's DISGUSTING.... I'll take the Big Mac" best part of the video

[@kennethbrady]

This guy gets better and better. One of the very best out there.

[@user-dp4bu8jy4b]

"McDonalds: Momentary pleasure, turns into guilt and finally cancer"...

[@nesslymeme5070]

But.... but... now there's all-day breakfast! Now how will i know when breakfast ends?!?!?!?!?!

[@Xhoven]

+Dr. Awesomenessly I don't know what to tell you. :( Wait, what time is it right now? Should I be eating breakfast, or lunch? What year is it? God help us.

[@MeaghanTamara]

Sausage burrito is good anytime.

[@tchapman1977]

I don't care what it's made of, but every time I eat a double quarter pounder, I hear the angels sing out from heaven...not sure what they put in it (maybe crack cocaine or some other highly addictive substance) but that thing is so darn good! Also, why is it that McDonald's coca-cola tastes so much better than what you get anywhere else?

[@tobiasfarragut292]

more sugar.. more Rim cleaner lol.... coke out the can IS the best. shitll burn rite thru esophagus

[@alisoncobb3292]

Cause IT'S NOT! It's the most horrible burger ever. I feel so sorry for brainwashed sheep who think this crap is food. Coke isn't even better...watery. Fries sometimes good, sometimes too soft, sometimes dried out so they're too hard on the outside and pithy on the inside. I hope you have a decent burger someday, and have actual fries. Cooked once at a lower temp, drained and cooked again at a higher temp, that's a real, fabulous French fry. Of course Gaffigan's hilarious, and probably eats better stuff...really good fries, bacon and donuts...

[@vanessavalli3769]

Alison Cobb by h123546

[@arverite7311]

Alison Cobb mcdonalds is quick and easy not 5 stars

[@alisoncobb3292]

radio star Who said it had to be 5 stars? The Angus burger can be good (mushroom Swiss), and I really like the garlic butter one at Jack's...it just doesn't need to be 1 star, or zero...

[@masonfilms6218]

My English teacher showed us this on the last day of school and the entire class was crazy and laughing like crazy.

[@Gaz66d]

I was actually entertained by this, I even lol'd legitimately three times. I been in such a mood lately I didn't think anyone could snap me out of it. Thank you Jim Gaffigan And thank you MacDonalds.

[@jdaman224]

"Our mascot is a pedophile clown from the 70's" LOL

[@joshapple6905]

That's one of my favorite lines, along with Chocolate Bogger Hormonal Tenager And "I hate you, your Gross!!, whens Dinner?" Lol

[@florakovacs2160]

I just can't get enough of this!

[@LindsayColombe]

I love you, Jim!

[@wesj1989]

Momentary pleasure followed by incredible guilt eventually leading to cancer. I'm lovin' it!

[@coopart1]

Jim you are my favorite comedian! Hope you keep it coming for years to come.

[@mothership9207]

“Oh look, a bonus fry” Lol 😂

[@alexfraser8352]

Do-do-do-do-doooooo..... MISTAKE!

[@twoface2001]

HOTPOCKET!!

[@sg2massive]

+twoface2001 look up Brian Reagan hot pocket lol you will laugh .

[@tegunn]

+sg2massive hot pocket skit is Jim Gaffigan

[@Cubroncs03]

+sg2massive Seriously? If you were anywhere else but on this page, or any other Gaffigan vid, the mistake wouldn't be so mind-boggling... but, yeah, that's totally a Jim Gaffigan bit.

[@Vazcular]

+Cubroncs03 g8eyis

[@hippiedachshunds1632]

Love, love love his comedy!

[@lindaduncan2954]

Your humor makes me happy Jim! I hope you never run out of material! Best comedian ever...and thanks for keeping it clean! 💕

[@franciscomtirado97]

Jim has a level of comedic genius that derives from everyday life, he has a way of putting perspective on ordinary things that we can relate to, and make us laugh. Jim your a hero for laughter!

[@zyxwut321]

I'm laughing at this bit years later after seeing it for the 4th or 5th time. Something about his delivery and tone just makes it work more than you'd think it would if you just read a transcript of the act on paper.

[@egdapo]

i love how he goes "...not even close" in that silent low pitch voice rotflmao

[@TheTrinidad23]

Found this guy yesterday and I absolutely love him

[@georgecorrea8530]

Jim Gaffigan is brilliant. A gift to humanity.

[@Jusoon]

Ive watched this a dozen times and i still laugh out loud. Gaffigan is amazing

[@TravisTarrant]

I'm in pain from the laughter- LOVE IT!!!

[@brittanywesthooper]

Me too especially when he says when would we know when breakfast ends? When would we know when St. Patrick's day is? Lol

[@MaryA-qh6so]

I think that he is really funny. I was laughing along with the audience.

[@Divology]

lots of people were

[@bidsteak9696]

I was drinking a Starbucks Carmel Frappe when he said it

[@AlexanderGarcia-og9cr]

Jim is like the John Wick of comedy. He doesn't need a machine gun or a super edgy sword to kill you. He only needs a pencil.

[@nicolebarnett8702]

Almost spit my coffee everywhere when you said "you wouldn't want Jesus to talk like this" thanks for a great start to the day!

[@chelyferrer8834]

7:33 killed me 😂😂😂

[@Divology]

Oh yea and 388:284827647274 made me chuckle

[@karaa7595]

I talked to my dad on the phone last night and he was telling me about the hamburger he made for himself. I asked him what he had to drink, "chocolate milk" lol.

[@bentybaroon8938]

“Yeah....he should be here any minute...” 😂

[@RolliePollie24]

Thanks Jim, my guinea pig just died and you STILL managed to cheer me up. Thank you :)

[@arikalamari19]

jim gaffigan is the only comedian i keep coming back🤙

[@zonadirks7356]

I think he is the funnest comedian!

[@kellyrodgers9326]

I cried laughing all the way through.

[@pforgottonsoul]

go to Five guys and you get like 300 bonus fries :P

[@timgersh6787]

+patrick watkins well like with mcdonnals its rare and some times you get it but sometimes you dont but at five guys you order your meal and they toss some extra fries in the bag

[@develfier]

That's only because their serving container is so small to begin with.

[@87slizza]

+develfier i love five guys but if i eat all those fries i can feel my soul leaving my body

[@chilidoghamsalad9952]

+develfier if their serving container was large enough for all those fries, ppl would wtf at their food

[@seanwilkinson3975]

300? I think you're forgetting another couple of decimal places. They'll fill the fry cup, put it in the bag with your burger, then top the whole shebang with another three whole scoops of fries. 30,000 is definitely closer.

[@ItsNotMeitsYouTu8e]

I love this guy. So funny, so true, and there's some benevolent wisdom in the subtexts methinks.

[@epidemicmediafilms]

Jim your killing it for real best comedy when ever your new stand up comes out

[@SL-zn9oh]

7:33 excuse me we sell burgers and fries haha genius

[@alexlubbers1589]

its true that mcdonalds fries are amazing.

[@swordslinger2269]

makes me wonder why I can't stop eating course in idaho they be even better cause IDAHO SPUDS BITHCES

[@alexlubbers1589]

yum. i live in vancouver so... maple syrup i guess

[@swordslinger2269]

Get me a ticket to Vancouver NOW XD I am literally addicted to maple syrup pancakes waffles French toast you name it it starts to swim in maple syrup

[@alexlubbers1589]

if only i had enough money i would gladly do it. also im busy setting up parts of my big christmas lights show before a weeklong series of intense rain and windstorms sets in tomorrow night.

[@Alfonsoltd]

Uh huh. And Wendy's fries are gross. Though I do prefer their burgers.

[@derpymooseplays677]

i was laughing my ass off this whole time. so funny

[@KikoJonesUSA]

This bit NEVER gets old. Also, I want a Big Mac now.

[@shalaylaw7933]

This guy can make anyone laugh :) he picks the greatest topics and embraces himself lol greatest comedian of our time for sure!

[@joehartman5543]

He's not wrong

[@tessc541]

LUV THIS GUY!!

[@lukeGGlee]

Yay jim gaffigan! Jus' cant get enough !!!!!!!!!!!

[@stephanienevin1207]

We love Jim!

[@lightacandle5]

Can't wait to see Jim on July 21st!!!!!!

[@Family4RealVlogs]

Jim Gaffigan liked my tweet.......true story!

[@TheShonuff888]

HOT POCKET!!

[@spookyscaryhaley]

BULL SHIT

[@spookyscaryhaley]

More BULL SHIT

[@carelesschip786]

No honey no

[@Wolf-os9yu]

What was the tweet ???

[@featherworn]

Jim gaffihin? More like Jim LAUGHAGIN XD

[@kennydufo6990]

Im meeting a hooker he should be here by now xD

[@TheBlaine]

Kenny Dufo I see you also watched the video

[@elmonixon4392]

I'm new to the man. I thought this was merely gonna be comedic. I was pleasantly surprised at the mans insight towards the end when he parrelled many other aspects of American culture to McDonaldism. Brilliant!

[@dharmabeachbum6330]

Anyone else close to tears listening to this even though you've heard it ten times over the years?

[@seawatersoul333]

This guy is hilarioussssss and without swearing and sex talk!! ♡

[@joedu-browski6027]

my teacher played this in class

[@butterflyjar829]

thats awesome

[@swordslinger2269]

best teacher EVER

[@joedu-browski6027]

+swordslinger 226 I know I got amazing teachers and shitty teachers. My science teacher this year is one of the best teachers I've ever had he said "cleavage is how a rock breaks not what a woman shakes" it was amazing he also was talking about silicon and silicone and when people started to laugh he said "Yes I know silicone is used to give women what nature didn't give them"

[@swordslinger2269]

Joe Du-Browski Fucking priceless

[@boko1564]

I love this guy!

[@boko1564]

+NonReactor YOu thought Eating there was bad. try working there.

[@youraveragedog9161]

+NonReactor i can say the same

[@youraveragedog9161]

i actually know someone who worked at a McDonalds he said was the worst

[@JaySinghIsImmature]

This man is not normal..... .... Thank God 🙏

[@juleshappy741]

Brilliant stuff here, Jim. Thank you!!!! “What is this? A library? I’ll get some fries 🍟 while I’m here.” - Jim Gaffigan