Johann Hari - The Antidote for Loneliness

[@Crymble]

He is a very smart guy. I have so much respect for this guy, wish people like him went into politics.

[@UPLIFT]

That would be a thing!

[@bilelsidaoui8808]

He was accused of plagiarism and his career went to shit

[@Onlinesully]

Bilel Sidaoui there is nothing new on what he says really but he is a nice chap

[@amanofnoreputation2164]

Politics is it's own game. I don't think people who are actually good at solving problems and reaching an understanding are liable to succeed any more than a doctor can be expected to prevent you from falling ill: if you do fall ill, he'll help. That's his area. But he can't be an angel on your shoulder making sure you never get type two diabetes from eating too much sugar. You have to be responsible for that. It's a daunting thought that the people in government doesn't have much of any bearing on your life, but on the other hand, it means the ball is in your court.

[@kathydent2116]

@@bilelsidaoui8808 He wasn't just 'accused' of plagiarism. He admitted to a great deal of plagiarism, lying and deception. He set up a fake Wkipedia persona and used it to attack people that he didn't agree with. He could never go into politics because of his appalling behaviour. He is not a nice person. He can't work as a journalist because no-one will employ him. That's why he's here.

[@gretch8771]

Met Johan yesterday at a conference in Rotorua, NZ. Absolutely beautiful human being, adding huge value to the mental health & addictions sector. Love this guy!

[@Onlinesully]

Gretchen NZ I wish I could say the same He is a nice person alright. And very affable and has a good life. but his stuff is nothing new at all. community or tribes and nature and belonging.....of course that's what people need.

[@floatingchimney]

@Gretchen NZ, Gurl you're an absolutely beautiful human being yourself.

[@wildlightarts]

After every time I hear this man speak, I literally want to give him a hug. More of this wisdom, is what this world needs now. Thank you.

[@UPLIFT]

Thanks Diana, we think Johann has heaps of great wisdom here :-)

[@wildlightarts]

@@UPLIFT Yes, heaps of heart & wisdom. Thanks :-)

[@nehaghosh8584]

I heard Lisa's story before on the ted talk, and every time it makes me tear up. Why don't we have this kind of social therapy everywhere?? So many of us who are suffering could live to our fullest potential if only they'd give us the correct form of treatment.

[@williamhartman9]

This man a visionary,very wise from his own need to solve this dilemma,thank you sir

[@MrToddmacdonald2]

Lost Connections: A MUST READ.

[@danielroy8232]

"the most effctive ways of dealing with depression are the oned that deal with the reasons we feel bad in the first place". I think that every therapist needs to hear this.

[@christyburton8309]

Mr. Hari , YOU are a remarkible man.!! Thank - you for the peace you have given me 🙏. May GOD continue to bless you . Your Anointing has saved countless lives! Sincerely, Christiane B.

[@NewYork7914]

So true... Many people who got depressed look for the antidepressants pills first before they would get to find the main causes of the depressions. Medication couldn't be a right or permanent cure for every anxiety or depression.

[@jesskolbe609]

Yes, loved lost connections

[@ronhatcher7734]

I like your approach. he makes so much sense.

[@mjmallari796]

Thank you, Johann

[@honkeyness9427]

It seems obvious to me that the cause of my depression is loneliness and a feeling that I will never find a group who I fit in with. I used to have these groups but as you get older, the group-goals, which were the bind, disappear. The goals were things like trying to meet girls, getting through college, etc.. So what is the fix when the group-goals are gone? Society really offers very little past a certain age.

[@chickenandwaffles09]

100% agree w this. I have zero connections to any groups at my age. Everyone has moved on w their lives and here I am going thru my days alone.

[@LauraBellanova]

He's great

[@FART-REPELLENT]

My theory is that the more immense and prolonged suffering one experiences with no end, the more hardened and immune to loneliness one becomes; based on my personal experiences. Those of you who are lonely need to experience immense and prolonged suffering.

[@breeviewAWAKENING]

Yes!! Beautiful antidote.

[@Johnconno]

The days move on, they never end. Then suddenly there is change.

[@skippydeenice]

so spot on

[@robertmelia3780]

Stalking Mr Hari's wonderful mind now. ✌🏼️

[@ranyariri3552]

This is my current struggle….

[@molusio9775]

Take away?take part in a group to form connections!

[@cilantro6884]

Could the over abundance of cortisol cause shaking and trembling daily??? Ive been lonely for a long time and lately anxiety and shakes have been worse...

[@Lou-sn4xo]

The stuff I read about it didn't seem good, so, yeah, you may be right. I'm sorry this is happening to you. If you'd like to talk to someone, I'm here.

[@SophiesWorld2024]

I used to get that. I eventually realised my heart was beating really fast. I was prescribed a low dose of propranolol a beta blocker for high blood pressure and it's really helped. Been on it over 20 years. Many doctors will not prescribe it because they want you to find the root cause. I know the root cause for me...extreme stress as a kid at home... Aggressive mother. I now work on my breathing. Breath in for 8, hold for 4, breath out for 4, hold for 4. Practice regularly. I don't think it's as simple as lonlineness because you don't want to be around scary ppl and they can sense anxious ppl and play with them. Find an anxiety group on Meetup.com could provide safer people to meet

[@charissapeters9289]

Hello, I am sorry to hear you are having a difficult time. I know personally how hard this battle is!!! Do you listen to music? I find this helps me. I would recommend “Si Forever (Diamond Editions) by Andrea Bocelli. Take care💖💖💖

[@AlternicityBlogspot]

Do box breathing, and in a pinch wim hof breathing. Good luck :)

[@annchurchill2638]

So what do you do when you are in your 70's and your friends die off, one at a time, and there are none left? You don't feel like replacing them with more who will die off.

[@dx3910]

You find some whippersnappers to chat with :). My fondest social memories come from chats with respectful, calm, wise old people. Any excuse: proximity, a smile, or some form of small help can be an opportunity to connect. The supply won't run out ;), and even a very short term friendship can help both parties immensely.

[@Mohamed-bm6yk]

I'm happy finally i got some precursors signs of dementia and im gonna get rest from all this non stop shit

[@بثينهالاشقر]

If being with a goup is so important... What about fighting and killing each others... It is worst than loneliness

[@BitterCreekk]

There is a lot of similarities between his message and the the book “Tribe” by Sebastian Junger

[@kathydent2116]

Yes, he's very good at passing off other people's ideas as if they are his own.

[@starfox1]

he looks so different than the johann i knew yrs ago. he was a cute chub back then , now hes thin

[@AndreaAth]

Wow hearing how bad loneliness is for my health really helps me with my sickness anxiety. Not 😭😂

[@omordomo9685]

He is so cute. He would be the perfect cure for my lonileness 😍😍

[@jr5389]

CUTE…🤔 I just can’t see it…..however You made me laugh 😂 😂😂 thanks 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿😎

[@patriciavandevelde5469]

The reason I feel bad is corrupted governments, lies,ugly muppetshoq around me! Crooked lawyers and justice etc etc!

[@KimberlyFujioka]

Of course everyone realizes that he does these talks to promote his book. I read it. It’s pretty good. But not life changing. In short, we need community and the way things are is quite isolating.

[@Onlinesully]

Kimberly Fujioka Hi. Yes it's a good message. But it's not new information really. Or maybe it is for some people, and if so then hopefully they have the opportunity to make life changes based on the information.

[@sprinterproductionshd3061]

Well thats kind of like the whole point of the book. There is no 1 pill that can just make you happy And stop depression.

[@scherali994]

His purpose is to help human beings... not to sell his books.

[@openmind9820]

How do you become an expert in loneliness 😕

[@Crymble]

Feel lonely, understand loneliness and build connections.

[@alexzhao7880]

有acg的小伙伴吗

[@agdgdgwngo]

Johann, how do you explain this someone who hasn't felt comfortable in "tribes". It's no use saying thats why you are unhappy if whenever you are in a group you never are. Why would I want to tribe up, for my mental health when in the past it just means exposing how deeply unsociable I really am?? How would being a in a group make me happy, it just exposes me to how isolated I am even in that scenario. One reason I don't want to go anywhere near tribes is you find out fairly soon where you sit in the heirarchy, and those with the least social skills are the bottom. That's me. The point is when you've tried really hard to be a part of tribe, group or whatever and been excluded, or just not had a good time, you come to think its better to not try. Why face rejection from the tribe when you can reject the tribe yourself?? I like you Johann and I do agree with your politics but I don't think this is answer to mental health, though the pressures of life do certainly play a massive part. But I think your theories just don't apply to everyone, introverts, people with autism, complex mental health problems. This is insistence that it's all about sociability, and the only reason we are unhappy is because we're disconnected from the tribe and each other... All this so called tribe seems to be doing is judging me. Its taken on a persecutory capitalist nature that just excludes freaks and demonises anyone differenent, it is not your friend, it is not the solution to the worlds mental health problems.

[@bow5326]

Did you listen to this video? In this case the tribe consisted of individuals who had only one thing in common, their depression. Instead of having one on one therapeutic counselling they were give a task collectively, in this case they were to learn gardening. All these people as individuals were lonely, rejected and isolated, but working collectively toward a common goal, over time, they started helping each other with their problems... So you see, somewhere out there is a tribe for you with like minded people who are uncomfortable around groups of so called "normal people", who are awkward in expressing themselves and used to not being heard. Perhaps you'll find like a small commune of people, each living in their own little space (could be trailers, tents, tiny homes etc) who like to be by themselves but have the option to do collective chores, share meals, hobbies, create art or build structures etc.. I don't know what you are into, but just wanted to illustrate how finding other "misfits", even if it's just a few, could really make a big difference. You know what.... I may just have giving myself the best advice even though it's directed at you.. You see, I have been alone for the past 10 yrs, completely disillusioned by my fellow human beings. All my close friends and relatives died in a short space of time, and while I'm no longer depressed and have learned to accept my situation, I'm not exactly thriving or enjoying life to the max. I just "exist". So yeah, I need to find my own tribe, if I don't want to spend the next 10 yrs like the last. Good luck to you! Remember, your own expectations of others, are the biggest source of disappointment. Let go of expectations both from yourself, in trying to " fit in" because you think it's what other people expect of you, and from others, who may not know what it's like to be socially awkward, and search for the common ground..

[@agdgdgwngo]

@@bow5326 thank you for detailed and caring reply, I wish you luck too. I had forgetten the context my comment but my main objection to group therapy, especially the specific task. I'll tell you my first thought in their complete cynicism. As a construction labourer, I do things like that every day. Sometimes it's even gardening and it's ALWAYS with a group of mentally ill young men. Yeah sometimes the conditions (weather, nature of work) aren't conducive to therapy. But the biggest problem is the others, the guy with anger issues who always has a meltdown, the awkward perpetually confused boss, and me depressed who can't wait to go home. I feel other rub off on me too much, and I pick up their habits of thought and start imitating them in my own mind. I feel like if i spend too much time with others my individuality is eroded. I'm probably the exception to this treatment because it's not anxiety with me, it's aversion . I used to do public speech did quite well but I can't maintain a conservation with more than 1 other person at a time. Even then I don't know where to look.

[@honkeyness9427]

If you feel uncomfortable then you were not in a tribe

[@292Artemis]

Sounds like you have met a...holes who formed a tribe. I think that's part of the change we need: treating each other well. So tribes we need would make you feel welcome.

[@harryh628]

and isnt it curious that the substances that make us feel more of these connections are the ones prohibited.

[@Lou-sn4xo]

You don't need substances to feel connection at all, and in the long run they don't contribute to connection in any worthwhile way. If you wanna feel connected, I've got a challenge for you: read the New Testament as a child. Open your heart. If you don't do that, it's a waste of time.

[@gmar2662]

I have zero friends

[@junesnow5422]

G Wagon Do you want one?

[@honkeyness9427]

Same problem. Friends are formed under a common goal or stressor and once all these things are accomplished or overcome the friendships die. I have no answers but there has to be something.

[@FLdancer00]

Let me guess, the antidote is to just make friends?

[@TheGnomestead]

I have been bunched in the face more then Mike Tyson's bunching bag then. Now what?

[@AlternicityBlogspot]

My list, hope it helps. Get a dog. Do box breathing. White light meditation (imagine your body filling with bright white light). Do press ups/sit ups ie calisthenics. No substitute for real human connection but these things can help.

[@samdegoeij6576]

'Humans are an inately, social, economic and political animal.' Karl Marx.

[@jimbo9580]

None. For most of my life..

[@SophiesWorld2024]

But our connections are full of abuse from personality disorders...I think he is simplifying things too much.

[@junesnow5422]

J B I agree, and honestly I try being around people but people have become so toxic.

[@Onlinesully]

nice affable fellow. but he talks about this topic like he has discovered something new. It is well known my professionals and common folk alike that belonging and tribes and connection are critical to people. he would be a lot more effective to discuss real practical solutions. Something more. Come on. Sadly it appears it is more of book tour talk by him than anything else. Pity cause he could do so much if he wanted to.

[@db1o.926]

The point he is making is that too many of the health professionals, who supposedly know this, push pharmaceutical antidepressants as the magic bullet and first-line "solution" to what is a problem of human connection. Yes, it is obvious to many of us, but for some reason not to the doctors who insist that a pill is the immediate answer. If you read Lost Connections, you will see that the issue is not Hari stating something "so obvious," but why there isn't more focus on that than on pills.

[@Onlinesully]

Db1 O. it's so difficult to just make connections, when a life is totally broken. I'm very close to leaving

[@Elysianism]

Disagree... Go check out what Nikola Tesla has to say about that.