Husband Pays More Attention to His Phone Than His Family

Husband Pays More Attention to His Phone Than His Family
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[@baysideharpy8350]

Too many people, young and old, use their phones as a life support device.

[@CaToRi-]

He doesn’t complain about her because he is disconnected, he doesn’t know what she does or doesn’t …he simply doesn’t care.

[@cammiechavez1610]

Or codependent. He elevates her.

[@cyn5962]

It does come across like he doesn't care.

[@KS-xb3cg]

Phone addiction is real.

[@JaniceG11]

My husband was the same way …. I was setting his alarm clock for him one morning before going to work I saw lots of likes coming from his insta I was like oh hey! Wonder what picture he shared of the family that’s getting all the love ? I clicked open the app and found a secret Instagram . Only pictures of him not single one to show he is married or have babies. He liked and commented on all kinds of girls pictures. I was sick to my stomach! F the phone . We can be doing anything on these things .

[@morgandawn6413]

I'm so sorry. That must have been gut wrenching.

[@starrjohnson1327]

I believe a lot of people are doing this. On dating sites and on onlyfans when they are in a relationship! What's done in the dark always comes to the light.

[@nishmc6816]

Same here...I saw a message where my husband told a woman he still wanted her. Really shocked me. He said it wasn't him that his brother was using his phone, but really...I don't believe it bc the message was in the archives not in the inbox. Today I found he and his childhood friend share naked pics of women and they comment about it! To read the comments from my husband make my stomach sick! Now I don't know what to say bc I don't want him to know I went through it!

[@20Moody00]

@@nishmc6816 I’m so sorry. Men are disgusting and immature. It makes me question ever getting married

[@Lynetted79]

@@20Moody00something similar happened in my marriage and there is one thing I know for sure… i will never get married again. I’d rather be alone and not constantly paranoid.

[@nicolestanford4955]

My husband just denies everything I say. I have already communicated my feelings, vision for the family, etc. He tells me that he just doesn’t hear me when I speak. I’ll be waiting in the room with a movie paused and he will walk away (no words) and 40 mins later find him on his phone. Than he takes a shower. When he finally comes to watch the movie, he immediately falls asleep. 11 years…. 3 kids.

[@kimmiekats22]

I laughed absurdly hard at “you should text him” …

[@HLD0205]

I've tried that and didn't work for me, but you should still try. If they are so enthralled with their phone by texting someone else, looking at social media, or playing a game and they don't answer a text from their spouse, then there are other issues.

[@rociorocio9436]

Haaa😂😂 all while watching Dr.John on the cell😂🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😂

[@KS-xb3cg]

One part of your brain sees them there and another part says THEY DONT CARE. That’s what makes you bonkers.

[@emmawilkins5755]

So... A 'friend of mines' husband was glued to his phone. Turned out he was having an affair. To me it does make a difference why he is on the phone. Find out and address the issue. It's avoidance. Could be boredom or something else. Find out and then deal with it.

[@haileeroxana]

Yes! As soon as I saw the caption I’m like “that man is definitely having an affair or something “ theres just no way hes not

[@SherriLyle80s]

"mines?"

[@iHeartAmySue]

Yep. That’s what happened to my “friend”. Even if he is a minister, and he thinks he would NEVER, she needs to investigate.

[@shachede6828]

Your friend is not everybody. I don’t think his cheating. Simple

[@iHeartAmySue]

@@shachede6828 if only it were that simple.

[@wonder12374]

Unfortunately this marriage has an expiration date on it. The husband is unplugged from the marriage because he no longer has interest in his wife and kids they dont excite him. Doesn't mean he doesn't love them....he loves them and would do anything to support them but they no longer interest him. That phone may help him find someone who interests him more unfortunately for a season. When she tells him no phone he will resent her and become more disinterested. There is no fixing this.

[@HLD0205]

No person in a loving relationship will ever say, " I wish I spent more time on my phone (or gaming or social media)" when they are dying. I don't care how tired you are or desperate to keep your company floating - Get off the phone and prioritize your spouse at least for 30 minutes a day.

[@tylertyler6418]

Phones are like poison. I bring my little girls over to grandpas house and he sits there on a bench on his phone. He’s literally missing playing with my children or just watching them laugh and play. Then you ask him a question and get no reply. You think “thanks for loving me enough to hear me. Thanks for loving your grandkids and making our time special.” Same thing with my mother in law. Gets on fucking Facebook when we may only see her one weekend a month at best. And a Facebook video at full volume blares out over our in depth and insightful conversation with her husband/father in law. It makes you feel so low. Like you can’t just talk to us for 15 minutes? Without logging into Facebook? Meanwhile your grandchildren are growing older and won’t be little much longer.

[@kathyhughes4047]

I'm not one of those grandparents. Nothing is more important than spending time with the grandkids. And i have them all the time and their friends too. To bad you did'nt live closer 🥰 Canada Vancouver

[@Pickle2222]

U should nicely ask them to put it away for a certain amount of time y’all are there and say please, they’ll probs do it if ur nice

[@CaToRi-]

I don’t like to force people so if grownups grandparents prefer the FB, so be it, visit me when you are ready but I’m not visiting you anymore.

[@ABCD-si7px]

How many people are actually widowers and widows living with the zombie body of their love?

[@dj_86]

Really? they should be lucky

[@ABCD-si7px]

@@dj_86 You are ignorant of the subject we are discussing.

[@CaToRi-]

Very true. A zombie deep inside the cell phone, unresponsive… like a body on life support

[@leeb7622]

🤚

[@melaniereeder2349]

Before she talks to him she should quietly video him as he is checked out on his phone with his kids trying to get his attention. I think if he has a true heart of gold like she sad, that’ll do the trick.

[@PCKA1987]

Man. Yes. The phone is an escape. Mom of 5 here, and life is hard. I love it. But I feel like I need the dopamine hit. All day long. Ugh!

[@Jaxmusicgal23]

I tried having the conversation and he doesnt think it is a problem and I have to remind him of his agreement and he gets mad or ignore it and find ways to do important things in my life outside of his phone/screen addiction. Sadly its not just phone, it is also PC and video games.

[@anordinaryexistence7305]

Leave this person, they don’t respect or truly value you. Deep inside, I’m sure you already recognize this and that’s why you’re suffering because you’re not respecting or validating your feelings that are responding to his selfish actions

[@Lala89856]

I experienced this and it hell. Please leave as soon as you can.

[@easypeezie4494]

I personally think grown men who spend significant time with video games as being pathetic. Video games are for kids

[@joank.0421]

I can relate to this... I even suggested my husband have a hard stop for work because he would check email at anytime of day. Told him that people shouldn't expect him to respond to email at 9pm at night. So frustrating.

[@sarahalderman3126]

They don’t.

[@show_me_your_kitties]

Yeah they definitely don't expect that.

[@COINsimp2024]

She shouldn't even have to do all this. Night in a hotel etc. That's sad.

[@isaiahweeekes1088]

Relationships take work. This is what it looks like to give 100 when your partner is giving 50. Thats how you fortify foundations

[@oncetwice5942]

It is either a phone addiction or he is bored with the family life, or both.

[@couchtater4621]

She'll be calling again in about 6 months saying ' My husband moved out and left me for another women and I was completely blind sided'. 'I didn't see this coming, I'm completely in shock'.

[@kartboarder22g17]

No these things are just addicting devices. They do a lot of things they are a window into others lives, entertainment, etc. Just cause he is on his phone all the time doesn't mean it's an affair. On top of all that he does work from his phone.

[@couchtater4621]

@@kartboarder22g17 Yeah right, stay single. Even if he isn't having an affair, (which he is), what kind of father and husband is he really, if he comes home from work and completely ignores his family.

[@kartboarder22g17]

@@couchtater4621 her point of view he probably isn't completely ignoring his family. Everytime she looks over he is on the phone.

[@SaystheTruth3]

Yep!!

[@Maelu-op9gf]

This would feel awful :(

[@MsSullivan12]

My husband does this and has been doing this for years in my heart I feel like he his hiding from being an active father and husband. We don’t date or anything he just wants sex and that’s it. I’m missing family time like we used to when our daughter was small etc. it kills me bc I miss spending quality time together even if we go to dinner he is always on his phone

[@melissam7067]

I'm sorry but your marriage is not in good shape. I hope you can either communicate with him and insist on professional support or move on with your life.

[@justinmiller576]

Could be addicted to phone. Try small steps. Make a house rule no phone for 30 minutes when you get home no matter what then move it to 1 hour.

[@imanigg8101]

I feel like Beth right now. My husband is sweet and nice, works hard and also doesn't complain about me. It's been a long way, always on the phone. I keep complaining about it but now it's gotten worse. Somehow he's lately downloaded tiktok which he never had, not just watching videos but seriously participating in tiktok live. Not anything in specific they talk about. Just chit chatting, meeting new people who have now become like a new family to him. These tiktok lives go almost all night. It's hard to talk about anything because I'll be repeating the same thing few times. Even when we talk about something it's rushed just so he can go back to his chats. It's driving me crazy now that we are expecting our 1st child. It's really scary. I'm gonna try your tips. Hopefully it works.

[@user-fs3wz8hw9k]

I don't think this behavior has anything to do with the phone itself, it seems like he has a really difficult work-life balance. He should hire an employee to help him with the minor details of his real-estate business or restrict communication to absolute emergencies.

[@MRAROCKERDUDE]

I like that practical advice

[@wascallywabbit7102]

BOUNDARIES, DR. HENRY CLOUD

[@AngieW2727]

My God. I sat down to listen to this expecting it to be good Then she said she has a 3 year old and a 4 month old and that’s me. This is my life!

[@CraigWhargoul]

I recall a call that Dr Jon had where "wife has checked out of the marriage" very similar situation and he didn't treat that guy like this. Weird.

[@ryacky]

I'd love to see that call for comparison

[@l-train7876]

Why would you think he would treat both scenarios the same?

[@Pickle2222]

Girls and boys are different

[@blueravenchick]

Men and women are different, so of course it's different responses you dunce lol

[@yogaqueen1527]

Sounds like an affair, not job related

[@Cowgirlkate]

All about the dopamine!!

[@orangeblossoms88]

Maybe I'm a cynic... but I have a hard time buying any other explanation except that he's chatting someone up online.

[@cyn5962]

It is a possibility.

[@TheMechanicj]

I narrowly escaped a 15 year prison sentence for something I didn’t do so I been working 80-100 hours a week gonna have a paid off house next year so yeah I know what he means by zoning out when I’m debt free I gonna relax

[@addiskassa5165]

Most of Men are fool. They miss the most important moment in front of there eyes, So many people out internet selling there life and personality, Don't ignore your precious family life by stirring someone's photo or life. Please! Phone addiction is real! Wake up people!!!!!🙏🙏🙏

[@brightpage1020]

The man cheating? C’mon, now. Ambitions on behalf of your family is good. Unwinding after work is fine. When those good things are separating you from family on the daily, and you’re disrespecting the fact that your people are presently addressing you… um… that’s hiding. Tell him you feel disconnected and you miss him. Get a sitter and sneak him out as a surprise to have fun. Or get a life outside him and your kids. See if he notices or if you just become roommates.

[@MrsFJohnson]

I definitely can relate. I just gave up asking for answers. Im checking out mentally and I'm fine. 🤷‍♀️

[@iHeartAmySue]

Now leave him. Why have the liability because he will cheat and blame it on you.

[@MrsFJohnson]

@@iHeartAmySue liability? Nah... divorce isnt a rash decision to be made. Ive got a lot more to consider and pray about before I take my next step. If he cheats, I'm free to leave then. I wanna honor God, even if the situation seems/feels dire.

[@iHeartAmySue]

@@MrsFJohnson ok but please don’t assume God will help you if you honor Him. It doesn’t work that way. 🥺. Have a plan. Take care and God bless.

[@MrsFJohnson]

@@iHeartAmySue what makes you think Him "helping me" isnt with a plan? He orders my steps, even into tough situations. I need the strength to honor what He already ordained for marriage, especially when its trying and tempting to take the easy route. I dont believe in a genie type God. He has full authority over my life. If He leads me to stay or go, I want to be 100% He is guiding me because NOTHING good will come out of going against His will. I appreciate the advice though.

[@MrsFJohnson]

@@Fartiosa Its not the best. I have been praying, but I think my heart is guarded and Im not as receptive to laying it all down. I KNOW what's the best choice, just dont have the fortitude needed to endure tough times OR have the tougher convos, again.

[@Queen-jc8fd]

Something is bothering your husband.

[@sushmitamukherjee4025]

She seems like a great partner

[@-S-K-Miller]

Yup. This is sort of me. But feels like it's my wife too.

[@pimaggot]

It is all of the world

[@normantheforeman9866]

Go down to the local hardware store and get yourself a good 16oz hammer. And bring it down on his phone 😂

[@TheMechanicj]

I work 80 hours a week so I know the feeling

[@yogaqueen1527]

Crazy how relationships start off so great, as the years pass things change and cheating starts. people aren't meant to be together forever

[@te6739]

Or people have unrealistic expectations about how you actually have a long term relationship...

[@Umph84]

Not true at all. I’ve been with my wife for 16 years and we are still very much in love. Like anything in life, it isn’t always easy and it takes work but the payout of totally worth it.

[@RobertLinthicum]

He's got a girlfriend, methinks.

[@cyn5962]

Could be

[@lot2196]

I'm watching this on my phone. 😂

[@kerohime]

at least its for work. mine is on reddit all the time. I'm worth less than social media.

[@blueravenchick]

We don't know if he's actually working..... I doubt it.

[@johnlopez7412]

And if this womans husband wasn't killing it on real estate she would be calling and complaining that she doesn't feel secure because her husband is making no money, women need shet to complain about or they won't feel normal 🤷🏻‍♂️

[@brettemiller8046]

I bet you're single. Good. Grow up. Because the mature thing is balance. She's trying not to complain and is asking how to respectfully bring this issue up with him because communication in a relationship is healthy and he isn't balancing his work/home life at all. He's just a pocketbook at this point and she thought she had a husband.

[@blueravenchick]

Doubt he's spending all that time actually working lol

[@Ja50nkAt]

Or he might just be a stressed out dad trying to provide for his young family.

[@mikemcbeth3216]

I'm glad no kids no wife

[@ethan4048]

He needs a hobby

[@marvi1515]

He does, and she needs to allow him to express that without resorting to nagging.

[@marlenehahn5678]

He needs to put down his phone and connect to his family before its to late.

[@anjav77]

What if my husband just started doing options trading and is now on his phone every 10 mins, always until 10pm, when the market in the US closes? He refuses to put it down because making money is SO important for him? ALL what we had before is gone (watching TV, cinema, restaurants, everything). He tells me it should be enough to have him sit in the same room. His job is not enough for him, he wants more money. When i say i will work again too, and we will then have 2000 savings a month, he says: its still not enough and he doesnt want to be a slave for an employer and do his own thing. He doesnt care what i say or if i cry.

[@blueravenchick]

He has a girlfriend.....

[@louwiscaraballo1462]

@@blueravenchickjust because he on his phone trying to make money you assume he automatically have a girlfriend? Ignorant

[@David-wo9un]

I wonder if this would work for me?

[@Carnivorepothead]

Dang! Lots of hurt women in this comment section 😳

[@miketheyunggod2534]

What a crybaby. Sheesh!

[@blueravenchick]

The wife is one thing, but to ignore your kids? You really think that's okay? Being a bad father?