Kazu Makino - Blonde Redhead

[@______me______]

She is a love of person, just yesterday I had the opportunity of watching her at Blonde's concert at Montreal, she stayed at the end to say bye to all the fans, she touched hands with everyone in the front and gave her music notes, really lovely vibes.

[@liamnewsom8583]

Totally. I saw them in Toronto the day before

[@c.n.3248]

"Hello, my name is Kazu. I'm a member of this band called 'Blonde Redhead'. I suppose the most important thing for me is that I feel alive. I often have a hard time feeling...feeling like I'm alive. I often feel a little bit detached or... or...quite, um, separated ---- from... from everything else around me. And so whatever that makes me feel like I'm.. I'm really alive, that's very important to me. Um.. I think that's one of the reason I play music also or perform; certain moments you really feel you're alive. Or I love... um.. my my life sort of goes around.. horses. I love horses. And I think the reason I like them because I feel very alive when I.. when I'm with them. Well, I I I suppose I have a big issue, big problem about just feeling something.. that. like (stutters a bit) I really exist or that I'm (stutters) living. So whatever kind of makes me feel that way is the most important thing to me. I I drunk I I (stutters) like drinking or staying up. I drink myself sometimes to limit because.. and somebody... my bandmates would say 'Why do you do things just to destroy yourself?' But I don't mean to destroy myself. But.. it's just... those moments I really feel alive.. just, sort of, pushing the limit like that [upward inflection at end of sentence]. It'sa It'sa It'sa almost like I do feel quite abstract most of the time. Too abstract. And I don't have a very concrete sensation of being fully connected to the world or being alive..with.. or I don't really feel like my mind is together with my body or something like this. So, when I'm riding, I suppose, I never think about anything. I am .. I am convinced about everything about myself.. of being alive. I don't even think about 'is this simple(?)'... this is... like this unquestionable feeling of being, how do you say it, existing."

[@c.n.3248]

I wrote all of this out, in the way that Kazu said it, because it's important (at least to me). #about

[@ImaZaphod]

***** Thank you! I wasn't sure what she said exactly. I did truly want to know. :)

[@polferiferus1938]

It was eloquent.

[@laaastplaaace]

“when I’m riding” might have been “when I’m writing,” no?

[@rb919]

This makes alot of sense out of why I love her music so much. I completely relate to the feeling she's talking about.. and her music makes me feel alive : ) Pushing limits in myself creates the moments where feeling alive is the most tangible for me.

[@pg123ab]

Beautiful voice, great musician complimented by a great band. She has a lot of courage to let out her feelings in pubic like this.

[@shadowmod3]

yeah. in many ways I am the same as her, but I can't even find the courage to have a real social media account fearing unwanted attention. this lady is truly out there flourishing in a mental realm where i wonder how to get out of not because that i don't like it, but fearing that I would die alone, being not understood or truly known and loved. i am younger than her by 2 years and a week.

[@WolfataDoor]

Completely sympathize with her 100%, sounds like she has depersonalization/derealization. I have it too, and it's from having extreme levels of anxiety, too much stress buildup in your brain, and it's a way of protecting you. There is a way over it, and thats by LETTING it be there.

[@pricesmith8450]

I keep hearing that.. I have it too and I suppose I haven't gotten to that point yet. It's been 6 years. Working on it.

[@k03dz0n3]

completely relatable

[@DerbJd]

I’ve had this since the early 90s and it’s permanent for me. Both DP and DR full time.

[@baggatell]

I´m deeply touched by Kazus fragile personality, by chance i heard one of her songs some months ago, and fell in love on the spot, ..listening over and over again I started to look on the videos and shivered inside -it´s so great when less is more When i saw her i recognized something i couldn't put my finger on, so familiar and like my own ways of moving, -something in the small reactions Hearing this self exposing interview i think i see why, -i can describe my life alike. Tears in my eyes

[@micaelalubschik267]

suddenly everybody here is a doctor, a psychologist, a therapist, etc..... suddenly everybody knows what she's going through... it might not be that simple,surely is quite hard... the only thing left is to encourage her to do whatever she likes to do to make her feel ok .. and that should be by listening to her songs.

[@DerbJd]

It’s Depersonalisation and Derealisation disorder. I’m not a doctor. I’ve had DPDR for 30 years. I know.

[@illyad5435]

This is literally the most relatable thing I have ever heard this made me feel like there is someone who understand what I think a lot of the time thanks kazu!

[@polferiferus1938]

I have (largely) overcome the opposite, being TOO stimulated, TOO connected to my body. I think both are extremely difficult states of being in a world that says be somewhere in the middle. I’ve never been able to capture the essence of what my life was like up into my early 50s, but I think Kazu did capture her state of being quite eloquently and better than I’m able. Both extremes make you feel like an alien to human existence, and you are misunderstood.

[@rb919]

"Hello. My name is Kazu. I'm a member of this band called Blonde Redhead. I suppose the most important thing for me is that I feel alive. I often have a hard time feeling like I'm alive. I often feel a little bit detached or quite separated from everything else around me. And so whatever that makes me feel like I'm really alive.. that's very important to me.

[@chairmanJackie]

She's probably 15-20 years older than me but damn i'm in love with her.

[@dre1011000]

Damn Jamaicans are everywhere.

[@rb919]

"I like drinking or staying up. I drink myself sometimes to limit because..and somebody..my bandmates would say "why do you do you things just to destroy yourself ?" but I don't mean to destroy myself.. it's just those moments I really feel alive. Just, sort of pushing the limit like that. It's almost like I do feel quite abstract most of the time."

[@1manorgy]

"I feel seperated..." *forgets about the interview for 10 seconds* "...from the things around me"

[@Dark-qh1ku]

Queue damaged coda meme

[@papavb]

She's so very beautiful in so many ways, and incredibly candid too.

[@ahriarah2268]

Depersonalization Is a fucking hell, but it makes you understand that there's so many things we don't appreciate when we are in good mental health, it makes you understand that misery is a butterfly

[@stargazerlilly608]

I catch so many Björk vibes from Kazu. 💖

[@rb919]

She's AMAZING and has a stunningly beautiful presence and soul. Just lovely all around. I love how soft-spoken and thoughtful she is. This interview makes me really understand more.. how that other part of herself is what's coming through in her performances. It's just very human and honest. GRACEFUL.

[@sirrealistoftheparanoiacsh9182]

She is one of the Graces on earth for a short time.

[@rb919]

@@sirrealistoftheparanoiacsh9182 Oh, you're going to REGRET that one.

[@gugamunruiz]

I really like her a lot. She is an awesome musician and a wonderful human being.

[@g.h.7661]

My favorite girl rocker. I’m glad this interview is out here. It is too relatable.

[@faridforghani2504]

hi kazu ...you are an angel . your sound and your feels in singing is celestial. I Don't know may be you are incarnation of IZANAMI

[@vjunicorndreams]

Excellent! I share this new tribute version of Blonde Redhead with Kazu Makino: Messenger kzbin.info/www/bejne/pIulYn95r8Z_jq8 Enjoy it!

[@Yeldi]

She is very open about herself. I can understand the link between detachement and drinking, what makes you feel alive and making music.

[@leyachan]

She's the most perfect girl in the world... Her voice is wonderful!

[@DerbJd]

It definitely does sound like Depersonalization and Derealization DPD. I have had them both since I was 16. It makes me thrive to learn one thing after another to challenge myself. The Depersonalization bit is the total feeling that your body is not your own, as a sensation of only existing as a thought, or as in a dream, but one where logic prevails. The Derealization bit is where all objects and surroundings are as if imagined, or not really there. Like floating in a virtual reality.

[@alcatrazsilencer4334]

I have the same thing since Im 14. Back then I listened a lot to their Debut and felt a very strong Connection. This Interview immediately let me think of DPD, too!

[@mafe123ish]

so sad but so beautiful

[@rb919]

She sounds like she experiences this feeling of abstraction about her sense of self ..and a sense of being detached from the relationship between her body and her environment in her general everyday experience. I think so many great artists share that same feeling.. almost depersonalized. That's what makes them so good at slipping out of their sense of self, picking up on subtler aspects of life, and then bringing them through in art and communicating the subtle realm of being human.

[@PhenomUprising]

I understand what she means by not always feeling alive. Now I just wish I would find, just like her, the thing that really makes me feel alive.

[@BoysLikeMeee]

@Neuronik That is so good. SO many people have issues, but they don't or won't or can't get help for themselves. Thanks for sharing with us.

[@Kento617]

I feel that way to on some days. Music for me is more of a treatment for me while God is my cure. No matter how hard life gets I just have to trust in the Lord and hope he can bring me through this day. I hope Kazu finds happiness in this. =)

[@thou9009]

Just because you can't get into the paradigm, doesn't mean it's unsubstantial. Newsom is unbelievably dimensional. Her work opens doors in the sky...and I think she is absolutely beautiful. I'm sorry that you can't experience that.

[@Luismiguelcampos]

Excellent music girl, Formidable band, sound and lirycs.. She`s perfect! I love it!

[@mogwai142]

She's cute even if u can see she's tired under her eyes (or is that genetics? I know ppl who have bags since their youth).. True artist and I wouldn't mind a hug from her and more. Must be quite a rollercoaster ride to go out with her!

[@clarencel]

I spoke to her after their gig at The Scala in London in Winter, 2005. She had recovered from her accident not too long ago and said it still hurt. She was much more articulate then but then again we weren't speaking about metaphysical things. Waiting behind me for her were two French grandmothers. Now that was interesting.

[@bamboozlie]

my life is similar, and i feel more alive when i hear her sing..

[@kavijackson868]

Love your music great band!

[@chocotastic1]

Get real, I saw her Friday night in Brooklyn and OMG the band was awesome. If she was 'cracked out' she could not play. She's an artist....artists are crazy. deal with it.

[@gergsar]

the thing to realize is, she's more alive than most

[@FloraNB]

gergsar But think about it, are you saying that people who, e.g. play music and party, are "more alive"? Why are certain experiences considered to be greater than others? Can't anyone be happy and feel alive because of anything? So when you think someone else is more alive than others are, doesn't that just mean that's what YOU think being alive would feel like for you, maybe even because other people tell you so? We can talk about being happy, that's fine of course, but basically what I'm saying is why do we let other people dictate what happiness is? Basically what I'm saying is, can I just paint my room like a rainbow and eat chocolate and drink wine every day and decide that that is what happiness and being alive means to me?

[@gergsar]

FloraNB yes, you can. Being "more alive", doesn't necessarily mean you're happy. Other than living by the golden rule, having fun is paramount.

[@gregstark6842]

Definitely agree! Happiness does not enter the picture in moments of pure passion, it is beyond that. But what if someone enjoyed feeling down? Apart from saying they are mentally ill, could you ever accept such a decision? Can it work?

[@gergsar]

I think 'feeling down', is sometimes a person's normal, and that is why they learn to accept it, and live within it.

[@servo1056]

@Pinksugarelephant yup...that sounds like a blonde redhead show....i love how personel they are...

[@servo1056]

hahaha!!! kazu is a lush!!!! its ok kazu i like drinking over my limit also...and often........hahaha i was lucky enough to meet the band in chicago....and since i live in new york...well................

[@Dwojy18]

I know how she feels. Life can be hard, it seems like nothing is going right but always try to love life and smile. It might make a whole world of difference for someone to see you smile even if they're a complete stranger. Kazu if you'll read this don't stress yourself too much it'll only bring more pain. I hope you're over a lot of the troubles you had when you recorded this vid. -3

[@julosx]

Kazu saves the honor of 4AD for being one of the very few women in one of their bands these days. Miki Berenyi, Emma Anderson, Tanya Donelly, etc., where have you gone ?

[@PaulaCies]

Es tan simple, y tan especial. Sin complicaciones.

[@emmanuelzaragoza7468]

She sounds am awful lot like Charlotte Gainsborough and slightly resembles her as well.

[@reyserpientes]

Cuando escucho a un norteamericano o a un inglés hablar español encuentro algo realmente conmovedor y entrañable en el sonido que producen, la forma en que lo imitan, y la intención de sus pensamientos. Aquel que dice que es una retardada y que necesita madurar, sin lugar a dudas tiene que vivir mas.

[@TempestaRiggs]

I feel sad because a lot of people who don't feel that way won't understand. I feel like that and it's one of the reasons I don't drive often. I become reckless because of the sensation of near death. I can't even understand love, I want that.

[@elliotwibley]

she is so beautiful.

[@avedic]

repeating the word alive makes sense considering english is her 2nd language. when i was learning french i would drive native french speakers crazy by using the same word over and over. when you're fluent, you can use subtly different words to convey what you mean. but when it isn't your primary language, you tend to gravitate to words that you know and are useful.

[@oopavio]

I love her, but if she says ALIVE one more time, I'll cry.

[@luizlac]

I remember her for her guest vocals in Caetano Veloso's song "Fora de Ordem", singing a line in Japanese that translates as "out of New World Order".

[@thanatos5024]

Caramba, nem sabia que eles tinham colaborado, sou fã de blonde redhead e da Kazu há muito tempo e nem tinha noção do fato que eles fizeram algo junto por menor que seja com o Caetano Veloso. Valeu por falar desse fato.

[@rb919]

"Too abstract. And I don't have a very concrete sensation of being fully connected to the world or being alive. Or I don't feel like my mind is together with my body.. or something like this. So when I'm riding, I suppose, I never think about anything. I am convinced about everything, about myself, about being alive. I don't even think about 'is this important ?' This is like just this unquestionable feeling of being.. how do you say.. EXISTING."

[@rb919]

"I think that's one of the reason I play music also or perform; certain moments you really feel you're alive. I love.. my life sort of goes around.. horses. I love horses. And I think the reason I like them because I feel very alive when I'm with them. Well, I suppose I have a big issue, big problem about just feeling something.. that I really exist or that I'm living. So whatever kind of makes me feel that way is the most important thing to me."

[@PretendIndustries]

I can relate.. hopefully we meet again..

[@trentigalaxy]

KAZU - you make me feel alive

[@rb919]

Sure. Her English is pretty broken but she still expresses herself so beautifully. Almost better than most English-speaking people would. For feeling so detached she seems pretty in touch with herself to me. I'll post this transcript I made. Hope it helps : ) I have to post it in parts because there is only so much space.

[@LostSubsForever]

i get how she feels. i always have a feeling of dissonance between my body and mind. it's less a total disconnection as Kazu describes, just more like, they don't really match, and that my mind never really feels comfortable in my body. unless, like Kazu, i drink. in which case, the inhibitions go, i'm more confident, and more comfortable in my own skin....until i pass out of course :P

[@Jetsi79]

@reyserpientes.....me gusta tu actitud. Se que hay mucha gente que les da pena intentar hablar espaniol. Yo antes era asi, pero ya se me quito! Y me gusta la manera en que kazu habla. Se ve mucha su personalidad.

[@grandmabilly2000]

I like how she's talking to the CAMERA like she's talking to a psycyatrist or someone she trusts to deal with her unresolved feelings. it's so rare in somebody creative not to hide their real feelings.... she can't look into the camera like she's doing a real interview. she wants to figure out herself through her art and through talking to people. I'm glad "drink myself to limits to destroy myself" but I don't talk about it especially to a national and I don't talk about it to internet.

[@somethingtidal]

I think artists of all forms can appreciate what she is saying. Since creative people tend to think more imaginatively than others we can get wrapped up in "what if" and "when". I completely understand what she is talking about, and its a sad thing to have to live with, but honestly creating music really does help. It's the only thing that can catch me when I'm spiraling down into a panic attack.

[@hjomalind]

she inspires me

[@thegayparade]

I really love her...although she did say the word 'alive' 8 times.

[@rb919]

Everybody feels that way from time to time, some people feel that way ALL the time. And so they are much more conversant with themselves in that way. They are able to convey it with noise or color or shape. That dimension of self where there is no distinct sense of self. Self just blurs with everything else entering the senses. And most people don't share a common language to convey that feeling. Words usually fail. AN EXPRESSION OF THE INEXPRESSIBLE. That album title makes total sense now : )

[@alllican]

I suppose the most important thing for me is that I feel alive!

[@dairyking887]

She so needs a hug. I couldn't agree more. She seems like she was wounded in childhood, badly. Mental illness is not a thing to be exploited for "art." It's better to get treatment (meds, therapy), see the world clearly, and then determine what identity to choose/who you are. I believe Kazu is being honest when she says she doesn't feel alive. But for gosh sake, Kazu, drinking yourself to death is not making you feel more alive. It's numbing the pain. Get help.

[@Asilhan]

an angel among us

[@TheRuddyc]

i am reading a book called "e squared" by matt beaumont currently and features a character named "kazu makino". can't be a coincidence i suppose! just wondering whether authors could really do that kind of thing and use a person's real name...nvm book is really funny.

[@merbywerby]

I feel that way all the time even after skydiving .. they asked how was it and i said fine. it was ok .

[@custimusti]

she's great.. so honest. I want to drink a bottle of wine with her.

[@joan_sneezes]

It sounds like she has severe dissociation, one of the forms of dissociative disorder. It can be brought on by depression, anxiety, drug use, drinking a lot. Man it's so sad. I had no idea. I hope someone notices and/or she gets into therapy. I know how she feels.

[@mfo1371]

al mirarla así parece, hasta que la escuches, ahí te das cuenta que la ultima cosa que es, es simple o sin complicaciones..

[@beornborg7309]

she needs a hug

[@drox334]

Great artist

[@Georgedogg1]

@bigcherry99 no you need to grow up and allow people to express themselves, the fact that she can talk about it shows how brave she is in talking about negative feelings we all have to go through. This interview is as honest as it comes

[@nikodemaz38]

thank you for being you!!!

[@DodingDagaGaming]

my sanity is slipping away

[@derris]

She's So lovely

[@editorinchimp]

I love her.

[@Jonas013]

Sure thing! She says so in the video as well, if you watch it too the end... :)

[@stephennicholas7095]

kazu. feel your pulse.

[@cedarraine7829]

Great Artist

[@Cragiesea]

I drink myself to a certain all the time.

[@perlathehutt]

she is soooo cute

[@aleeale8]

She's perfect.

[@Elnejo86]

amazing

[@lloplop]

MARRY ME KAZU!!!!!!

[@arsenijcz]

she is fucking amazing!!! cute to the bone, and i bet she's fun as fuck

[@oopavio]

@dlecusay I feel a̶l̶i̶v̶e̶ the same way. I really want to tell her how much her (their) music has changed my life. As a musician and as a person.

[@Bye_Hghts]

And now I'm in love with her. fUCK ME.

[@ser_ryon_vine6392]

+B0YL3 HEIGHTS yup

[@hanicegutierrez2071]

That's called derealization. I have that too, it sucks.

[@ИраВысоцкая-ъ4н]

Отличный трио! 👍👍👍👍👍👍

[@joey5jordison]

She is a goddes!

[@Hardbody94]

this is definitely in Brooklyn, NY.

[@beornborg7309]

She seems a bit disconnected with her emotions. People like her need nurturing relationships and hugs.

[@jopabaco]

grande !!!!

[@bones848484]

@n0td4v3, perhaps. She's married to an Italian (who's also in Blonde Redhead).

[@wyattarp1975]

This is painful to watch. I know the feeling.

[@world-rz9vz]

14 years ago

[@tekkenjam]

hope i find i someone as deep some day

[@dayuhanspace]

looks like she just came from last night's party.

[@mikelearkangel6297]

Kazu conectate contigo misma conocete a ti misma, aprendede a conocerte y te sentiras mas viva que nunca y veras que tienes un lugar especial para ti, aqui en este universo, un lugar al que todos los que amamos tu musica estaremos complacidos de visitar y disfrutar. (please translate)

[@mogwai142]

Yeah ill share a salad and some wine with her :)

[@BoysLikeMeee]

@TempestaRiggs I understand you, but I don't drive recklessly to feel anything. We all need love. Work to find it, however you can. It's worth it.

[@barbarapda_]

im only here sometimes