7 Steps To Get Over the Anger After Narcissistic Abuse

[@awenajones6055]

Swimming is my healing work❤️ I no longer have anger despite having moved from one narcissistic relationship to another all my life. My love and compassion is bottomless like the ocean appears when you swim in it. But there is a bottom, so once you hit the dark bottom the only way is up towards the light. Stop giving to a black hole, find the bottom, then find the light

[@nabilc1667]

I loved how real this video was, anger is indeed rooted into deep sadness and pain from the past.

[@ace7821]

I am a psychiatrist and neuroscientist. That rage is within you (us). DABSA. We can master that. But don’t put the shame back on them for not being accountable. That’s their work, not yours. Love this video

[@Tionaintown876]

Struggling to get over the anger towards how my narcissistic mother raised me

[@elizabethfindlay5752]

Me too, it's definitely not an easy feat

[@jmfs3497]

I have worked with an OCPD/narcissist for several years. I HAD to learn from all the related KZbin channels to even begin to come out of this healthy. I had some childhood CPTSD that I thought I had healed from the distance of adult hood, but I was in no way ready for the narcissistic mind. My big focus in therapy now is to not take abusive people personally, and that the abuse is about the abuser, not me. Grey Rocking has gone from a bare bones survival tactic, to becoming such a beautiful way to know myself and be fully present in life. Not everything needs said or responded to. My own inner monologue has calmed. My attention is always on my mental health, and I'm working on pivoting away from physically unhealthy coping mechanisms like over eating, binge watching nothing, and drugs/alcohol. It doesn't matter if the narc is hoovering or projecting his shame, I Grey Rock the entire relationship.

[@dsmusicbird]

OCPD?

[@avill012]

Chronic GI and migraine sufferer. When you explained the body storing the anger...i totally understand!❤

[@roberth2045]

I was married to a narcissistic woman. Just like Amber Heard. The Johnny Depp lawsuit brought back old memories. Except I have better stories lol. I learned people are going to do whatever they want. You have no control over them.

[@MLP8044]

Hey, hope your doing better!

[@roberth2045]

@MLP8044 yea I ended up changing the locks in the doors and told her to leave. The divorce took 10 years, 2 judges quit. And I went after the attorneys. In short.. I kicked their asses. Lol now I'm re-married to a good woman.

[@PiciPot]

Thank you Kenny! Very clear content. Anger suffocated me, located in my throat. I could not, dare not speak out or voice frustration as a child of narc mom. I worsened in later years. After my dear, loving father passed away, I was finally free to speak my mind. Rage therapy, grief and accumulated knowledge of the extent of her toxicity all aids in the journey to healing. Chronic inflamation and crippling pain are leaving my body. Hence, no contact with her and it seems to suit her perfectly.

[@FatimaMakesStuff]

My heart is where the pain is

[@alisaburtenshaw985]

I listened to this yesterday and last night I had a dream that showed me that your words helped me process through stuff and basically clean house. Thank you!!!

[@CamFrancisco88]

This is the answer I was looking for!

[@christinerogerson9400]

Kenny I like how you help us become better people no matter if others want to stay stuck. Your description of anger is from fear and sadness, and I think sometimes it's frustration because we don't know how to successfully relate to others making our feeling known in a way that let's people know how we feel without looking aggressive. Because we just want our feelings validated but I understand now anger and frustration just show those traits and don't tell anyone what's really going on so it comes out wrong. I've never been shown how to describe how I feel. I think you are so brave to show up in reality admitting your past hurts and misdemeanours. Thank you Kenny you are a joy to behold! 😃

[@getupandgo77]

I am not so sure that fear and anger that is below my anger with my narcissist ex-husband. I had anger due to the realization of how all the bullshit and hardship he put me through was completely unnecessary. At this point there is nothing to fear or be sad for with him. Just angry that I had to overcome so much for no reason other than his stupidity or insistence of control.

[@donksx]

Appreciate the insight

[@mikeleuk]

Thanks Kenny

[@annemariemiguel2541]

Hi Kenny, This video is so helpful. I am thinking about an ongoing experience, challenging, and how it is part of the reliving my trauma cycle, and how to heal and recover. The suggested videos are so helpful too. I need to hear more than once these messages, having your book and the videos really works for maximizing when and how much I can do at a time. :)

[@lp9155]

Brilliant Kenny Weiss. This is new to me completely and I really needed this today. Thks.

[@AA-cb7dz]

All self-expression towards them will be used, so reaction control is essential.

[@gertaqilla7795]

I was scared of crying.Then after I released that fear fir crying, I decided to do the same process of my grandmothers after they lost their husbands.....they cried every day for 40 days or more.And then I caught myself crying during listening classical music, I was terrified, how could this was possible?And I asked worried my therapeut and she smiled telling me:"One of the purposes of classical music is to make people cry".I listen so much now when I need to cry and I cry.Sometimes I watch paintings which touch me and I cry or I paint figures or face expressions or decisive moments of life which help me to cry. Please to all men, don t be ashamed to cry, cryi g is not weakness, in my eyes, as a woman it is strength and you also have the right to cry.I wish you all watching tgis video, a very nice and helpfull crying as long as it could take🤗💞!

[@gregpendrey6711]

been so medicated it's not easy. Holding is bad for the heart though.

[@onnol917]

Yeah showing emotions is a powerful sign of being human. Women however are very flaky about liking this. Basicly all the anecdotal evidence I have is that they lost sexual interest after seeing someone pure in their emotion. (My theory is that it collides with how 'the ideal man' actual is rather than the fantasy)

[@gertaqilla7795]

@@onnol917 Is it not sexy seeing the man naked 🤔?Crying is being naked in front of her.... This is very sexy and mostly, more than sexy...it s intimacy.

[@onnol917]

@@gertaqilla7795sure it sounds sexy but from my experience hey want someone that is emotionally stable to the point of unavailable, both adventurous and safe, gentle yet slightly dominant. Better to hold the feelings from them and handle that with your best friends or alone. Nothing ever good came from giving power to someone you love

[@SosoBrene12]

Grew up in a family of 12 & was clingy to my Mom, but she worked constantly and only remember two sisters being sympathetic, one older and other 2 years older than myself. Most of my brothers were close to me except my oldest brother because of age difference, and fact he disliked the fact that Mom kept having children.

[@deniserichter5372]

⛅Thank you for speaking so clearly on the topic!

[@raginald7mars408]

... as a German Biologist I take it as part of the training of Social Awareness to SPOT FAST from afar the antagonistic Trouble Maker who only knows aggression and betrayal. The Best of them have carefully crafted Masks - and are excellent Actors of Charm . it is a thin Veneeer - we have to become Social Detectives to look through and learn - how to deal with Vampyres and Predators. when ever possible I prefer to go away. I left many excellent Jobs because of those Monsters - who dominate an entire Company. Or the Wife you marry - turning out to be your worst enemy... Years in Solitairy Study and Training to build the strong No Tres Passing Fire Wall... it is Intense Endurance Training - that leads to Inner Strength - to better know our resources

[@Dannniellleee]

I’m trying to see my own experiences in this exact way. Do you have any tips on how to do it without being so… ANGRY?!

[@virginiaharvey]

I've been reading and doing affirmations on inner child healing

[@FatimaMakesStuff]

It’s really hard dealing with it when it’s a parent and then you attract a relationship with a similar person

[@confusedwhynot]

I don't hate my spouse even though he exhibits all the signs of a narcissist. I don't like what he did to me and our children. I have empathy for him, because I know where the behavior stems from.

[@simev500]

10:30 The saying goes: "Hurt me once, shame on you; hurt twice, shame on me"

[@johnboggia2720]

Thanks Kenny! ❤🥲

[@kennyweiss]

You are so very welcome!

[@Nina-w7m8q]

Narcissist father controlled everything - including not allowing us to express emotions.

[@smartypants6198]

That's true.

[@jodimo]

Thankyou

[@kennyweiss]

You’re welcome 😊

[@mama66333]

For me hurt is the emotion the anger is covering. Immense hurt. Not fear or sadness.

[@traweler155]

It is also my experience. This is huge, a lot more than fear or sadness

[@kerryfaden94]

Thank you It helped!!!

[@kennyweiss]

Glad it helped!

[@michaelgarrow3239]

I am angry, I lost $2-$3 million; lost my life. Lost my house. I remember crying at 2yo mom wouldn’t come. I remember resolving never to need her again.

[@Truthmender]

My ex gf Narc murdered my dog and tried with me, I am angry and feel guilt for having that happen, my dog was my daughter and all I had. My fear, I guess is that I am powerless to do anything about it, it's hard to let go of that part... Other wise I am trhiving and doing okay. The only pain is that I was so dumb. Thanks Mr. Weiss for all you do

[@Ervinabrahamian]

I'm sorry...don't feel bad about being duped, it's the one thing you have in common with EVERYONE ELSE. The entire world has been duped, even the narcissists that duped us. Stay strong, I know it's hard. I'm struggling right now too, but I know it'll get better, it has to.

[@Truthmender]

@@Ervinabrahamian Been a couple of years now and let me tell you it's night and day, it gets sooo much better , all things pass. Stay strong too

[@amekorbel73]

I dont buy into the pain from the past. My parents never put me in the same situation of betrayal lying and gaslighting that my husband did.

[@montanabirdmommy]

Two of our siblings have done heinous things, including using AI to fake voice calls for the purpose of catfishing and inflicting emotional distress, and even telling us that our siblings were dead when they were fine, TWICE now. The first time we all grieved for weeks before they came clean. This time they used AI, and the fake AI voice clones aren’t that good, so we only fell for it for a minute. Unfortunately, it looks like my ex-friend has been falling for the AI. TEACH YOUR FAMILIES A CODE WORD. Don’t be fooled by AI. My ex-friend was fooled. My sibling was fooled. Teach your family the dangers of AI. Mine was family, but run of the mill scammers use it too. Protect your family. Designate a code so you know it’s really them, just like the code a security company asks for when they call for a tripped alarm.

[@Imnotyourdoormat]

The Richard Proenneke Alaskan Method may help quench any anger toward the narcissist....

[@terryibrahim6534]

Anger is not fear

[@maureenbennett809]

The narcissist that hurt me deeply was my dentist.

[@freedomwarrior5087]

I disagree, the first step is educating yourself about narcissistic abuse. It's pretty difficult to find one or two points in time when one was belittled, shamed and abused in countless ways when this was a daily way of life.

[@michaelgarrow3239]

Yes! You need to know that what they are doing to you isn’t ok. 😁

[@apsarasangreal84]

Thought... how... how could you hate your own 5 year old?

[@Dannniellleee]

Same! I also don’t feel fear. I am pissed and sad- I don’t think fear of rejection or inadequacy will apply to most people who were raised with these dynamics unless they still think they were the problem.

[@LesleyGarvs-vo7eq]

I also remember an angry kindergarten teacher out of nowhere pulling my left ear and spanking me in the head😡...I don t remember feeling angry...rather confused...till today...i guess she thought I was the one interrupting her...yet...it was my second day at school...i was totally shy...

[@apsarasangreal84]

3.5 yrs old

[@LesleyGarvs-vo7eq]

I remember me skating and my friend throwing water so that I fall.. i was so angry😡...i took a stone and hit him in the head as a kid. But I don t reme.ber the part of my body I felt this. I most also have repressed and for my child sexual molestor who seduced me to fall into his sexual games as a kid😡...yet I don t remember this either...as this guy was an expert in soft gaslighting. My mom also an expert gaslighter😡...but one day I will remember and find out😡

[@darealtin]

God Forgives!

[@epilepticwelder]

anthropophobia is the most common of all

[@epilepticwelder]

foolish to assume everyone was yelled or shamed into anger or anthropophobia

[@cliftonbowers6376]

My solution to my inadequacies is everything is just jack the shit up 😮

[@cliftonbowers6376]

My worst day would be to be dunk 😮😊