How Self-Love Is Ruining Our Society

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[@morganica]

"my name is Leon Hendricks and in my career I've helped thousands of people hate themselves and others" 🤣

[@sswd4]

bro thinks his funny:

[@user-sq9qu7cz8k]

Bruv he'll fuk u in real life if u said this to his face

[@IsmailTaleb]

I've been thinking about this exact concept for the past 6 months, here and there. We have become so individualistic that it's scary. Everyone thinks only about themselves... (me included)

[@mikaelaalmeida3498]

It's incredible how you can communicate something like this so clearly! I've been thinking of it for a while now and I just couldn't put into words. Wow! Thank you.

[@PaulYuNow]

Leon these videos may not be getting as much views as your previous ones but there is a lot of value in them and I hope you know that THESE ARE GREAT. Keep posting more like these.

[@blondiepianist]

Hoooly...what I needed today. One of your best talks yet. Thank you Leon! :) Thanks for having the guts to tackle this. And I 100% relate to this truth: some of the THE BEST times of my life were me serving others and giving of myself.

[@regina6838]

Love this attitude. ❤

[@JackCalvinRoss]

I think you've nailed the problem I've had with this space for years that's made making videos on these topics consistently feel so difficult. So self obsessed, so focused on "inner changes". After long enough on this path you either become fully obsessed or realize that doing things for others and your community are really the only things that matter. So hard to see it when you're starving and trying to get a business off the ground but I do wish I could go back and warm myself not to focus so much on myself and to just be in the world with other people.

[@Kil369]

Why does Leon have 2 horns

[@marekpaul824]

I am pretty sure this Video is some kind of experiment. Because he is to aware to not notice the horn.

[@tomaszszafarczyk4754]

Pretty sure to look like a devil('s advocate) :)

[@KojoHimself]

The reason you cant „fully“ love some else without loving yourself first is that the first notion of love starts with yourself. If the fundament is corrupted you develop a distorted view of what it means to love someone. Example: a guy who doesnt love himself, might feel insecure, unimportant, small. When he loves his girlfriend he will have a distorted view. Example: Not appreciating your girlfriend enough(because you dont appreciate yourself). Beeing inconsiderate(because you are beeing inconsiderate to yourself) If you forget these qualities on yourself, you wont magically develop them through the power of romance like in a disney movie.

[@nikiseptinandivaaldi7211]

Instead of self love and becoming narcissist, why not one just fall in love with hobbies and work?

[@ZangaDe]

Well said, i agree, we should fall in love with what we do on a daily basis.

[@jewelbency5072]

I think that's what emma was talking about, or even anyone who talks about being self-partnered

[@nikiseptinandivaaldi7211]

@@jewelbency5072 What Emma is talking about is slightly different from what I discussed. The difference lies in the outcomes. What Emma is talking about, self-partnered, involves prioritizing yourself and dating yourself with the outcome of loving oneself more. On the other hand, what I was talking about is simply finding enjoyment in life through work, hobbies, without considering one's relationship status (whether single, dating, or married), so that you can let life flow with a more objective outlook.

[@JennyyTaco]

THANK YOU. I thought I was weird for feeling absolutely miserable and depressed when I was literally on a full-on constant improvement journey. You would think it would be the opposite but it made me unable to enjoy life as it is now and just accept that improvement is not linear and imperfect.

[@antonetwas2415]

We live in a society and not a empty forest where you yourself have to survive on your own.

[@theherok_plays]

true

[@user-wn1nt3dh8t]

Leon, you are doing great with your videos! Thank you for them!

[@GEN]

Great video g listened to the whole thing - love the new format

[@djtomasuk]

Thank you for this video, Leon!!!

[@English4Executives]

Hey Leon! I really loved this video. It makes a lot of sense and has inspired me to worry less about myself and want to serve others. Keep up the good work! 👍

[@enyichi]

I really love this new format Leon. Thank you so much for the video.

[@regina6838]

Reflecting. Putting yourself in someone else's shoes. It's the way to understand our ego. ❤

[@Because_Reasons]

Amen. We're in the era of unbridled Narcissism and Dark triad traits being exalted. I've learned FAR more (and in fact learned how to truly love myself) ONLY and I mean ONLY when and through being in relationship.. Being alone/single is so fucking easy. No one to bother you, no one to reflect your own bullshit to. No one to trigger your shadow... Eaesy Peasy.

[@MCShurett]

freaking love you and your content

[@thomasfriedl3137]

Sinking birth rates is a problem that is so much bigger than most people recognise.

[@Marzuwq]

This was very eye opening I’m surprised it doesn’t have a lot more views…anyway great work as usual Leon

[@hirotrex42]

Well i'll apply what you shared and tell you thank you for your videos that always makes me think more on subjects and come out as a better person. Thank you for your time and effort to share this. Also i like this more chill format, minimal editing, its easy to watch and follow, i like it when i am in a calm mood. When i am more driven, i tend to prefer your previous, more stimulating videos. I love both. Stay Drvn

[@BB-35]

One of the best talks, maybe won’t get a lot views but this is helpful concept.

[@MrMagicharry]

"They might have a personality of a cardboard box" - thanks, added to my expression vocabulary

[@ariamontgomery6371]

The legend is back

[@amirjoshua8212]

Thankyou Leon For This Amazing Video! :]

[@sascha_trvl]

I kinda stopped watching your channel since you´ve switched to podcast, but I have to say I really love your Podcast conzept to. I think it´s just your personality and the art how to talk to people what a appreciated. Please never stop to do this stuff! You´ve really helped me a lot since I follow your channel! Take care of your self :) Greetings from Germany

[@Amir-pf9uc]

That was really impressive and changed the way i look through the relationships, thanks.

[@Fwakhry]

at minute 20:00 .. that really proves you are a good person .. or at least you striving to be. Good for you brother, I hope the world has many people of your kind

[@shauryajain675]

The reason we need to live ourselves first is because we have to live with ourselves 24 hrs. Research has shown that people who are with themselves have the most successful relationships

[@ebruozyurek5266]

The echo examples are super interesting!

[@nadiaprivalikhina4101]

I'm listening to the part about constant healing, and thinking - isn't that social media that made us search all these signs of trauma in us? Isn't that social media that convince us that we are broken? Isn't that coaches who tell us that if we feel like shit, there's something wrong and we need their help? Marketers learned human psychology, learned how to manipulate our emotions, and now they inject that sense that life is a constant pain without their solutions only to make us buy their solutions.

[@zonda1065]

Most important takeaway for me: "people who truly love themselves dont think about self-love - they just do" 15:25

[@adhammater4237]

Self love and Working on yourself should be the product of one another, You can do both in a healthy way

[@progressandproductivity]

I think this is one of my favorite videos of yours. :) Well done :)

[@herbbuddies]

One of your best videos Leon! Thank you so much for putting this out, this helped me more than you know. As a self obsessed serial people pleaser I think it’s time to make some changes in my life starting with reaching out to some family members that I’ve been neglecting because I’m too busy “working on myself”. I’ve been feeling like I need to get to a certain point in my life/career before I can start helping others but your video has shown me that I can start now!

[@regina6838]

Totally shocked woth those numbers on loneliness. I feel so sorry for so many people.

[@delaysmartphones]

This is what the Dalai Lama has been banging on about for decades, on point as ever Leon, good to see your face again :)

[@bastavpoddar6104]

This echo thing really opened my eyes

[@melike475]

Before the video, I was thinking very differently: "I can't have a relationship without loving myself." or "someone who does not love himself cannot love anyone else." And these thoughts were eating me up. I always waited to be ready, for a relationship or to live life. No matter how much these thoughts bothered me, they seemed like a normal and normal thing to do since everyone around me and on social media did this. And actually, as someone who always complains about social media ruling our lives and does not buy trending things because I find them annoying, I have these thoughts and social media has completely influenced me. After this video, I thought about it thoroughly and realized how stupid these ideas really are. I feel so relieved I can't explain. I moved away from my family and friends to think about myself. I will put an end to this immediately and strengthen my bonds. And from now on, I will filter everything through my brain and include it in my life that way. Just like in this video. Thank you so much, it was a really great video❤️

[@isaacreis9440]

Awesome talk! What you described is essencially the Law of Attrachion. Like you said, once you understand it, there's no other way of seeing things, it just makes so much sense. However, for those who are not "there" yet to really understand how it works, we just sound dumb to them when trying to explaining it.

[@ruelliaphoenix]

Loving GOD more than anything helps you find a balance. Loving GOD makes you love everyone and at least in my personal experience gives me reason to live.

[@Julia-kl4hg]

Its not self love its narcissism

[@melodybartholomew8159]

Looking up Narcissus 😂so relatable. And this point is dead on.

[@HelloAlvi]

i already love my self and want to share my love and adventure

[@DawitHagos-ld4hw]

one of your best vids ever

[@dreas9236]

First of all, a great video. My perceptions and thoughts on this: The self-love mantra is increasingly being criticized because as human beings we are not designed for it. We have a social brain. Self-love alone is not enough to lead a wellbeing life. How often have I not loved myself, but found myself okay to some extent? I experience days where I find myself totally weak and unattractive and then days where I feel good about myself. I have never said to myself that I love myself. I think many people lack the ability to be genuinely loved by someone and to be a genuine lover themselves. I experienced many people who said: "I love myself" but their everyday behaviour spoke a completely different language. It would often be people who treated others negatively in the name of self-love. Who didn't treat themselves well, such as only living a screen life, or living their soul life purely for materialistic purpose and benefit. I once read: "The less you talk too negatively about yourself, the more you will like yourself" Maybe that can help a lot

[@regina6838]

Thank you so much. Well, if this video doesn't get many views or gets criticism, thanks for your conviction. And talking about something that isn't popular and is destroying society.

[@friizy6993]

Crazy video. Thank you

[@EcomCarl]

It's essential to strike a balance between self-love and other-love 💖. While focusing on ourselves is crucial, nurturing meaningful connections with others can significantly contribute to our overall happiness and well-being.

[@thomasfriedl3137]

0:38 Finally he says what he actually believes

[@NathanZehnder-fh9xp]

We are all healing because God has put his morals and moral code in us, and we feel sinful so we are trying to find validation and love in other ways than God, but it’s not working, that’s why they are always healing.

[@TheAceInfinity]

@8:30 - Why doesn't it make sense? It's not always that there's something missing, but in order to conduct yourself accordingly in a relationship in a healthy way you need to have some level of dignity and self-respect. People who don't have self-respect or self-love tend to push that responsibility onto others where it becomes more of a parasitic relationship, where the expectation is that the other person will always be the only one to make you happy, which is very draining. What precisely is your proof that there are "many people who have done *that*"? Are we talking about the relationships where people don't know what else to do or believe that they can't do any better, so they sit there putting up with their miserable relationships? To talk about this like it's a black and white problem and/or solution is incredibly naive for a topic like this... I would argue that if you have problems loving yourself, then it goes to say that you don't respect yourself enough for various reasons to be patient or practice appreciating you for who you are, and therefore, how could you possibly do the same for someone else if you can't even do that for yourself? tl;dr - "Self-love" is not ruining our society, you can't take the extremes to generalize a conclusion like this. I'm pretty certain there are far more reasons why people are not committing to serious monogamous relationships over the theoretical idea or concept of self-love; that's silly.

[@user-lb9ud6qh9h]

The legend is back ???

[@premiumturkish]

Loved this video soooooooo much.

[@premiumturkish]

“Working with animals… A butcher maybe?” ahahahahahahah

[@bruhbananut]

best video yet!

[@tadaspetra]

Damn. This video smacked me in the face. Hopefully this will change my life

[@ambani9070]

this is by far the most authentic, interesting and useful thing i’ve watched in a while. ty!

[@Story_Crow]

But Mark this: "There will be terrible times in the last days, For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God. They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires. Always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth." 2 Timothy 3:1-7

[@Antonseidl_]

this video made me think..

[@YouThisReadWrong.]

“The more you give the more you get” -some wise guy

[@thewittenhannahs9709]

you may enjoy Rationality: From AI To Zombies by Eliezer Ydcouski it is a book on overcoming bias, and different forms of logic. It is by far my favorite book. I enjoyed your video, Thank you.

[@terrisserose]

new sub. great content

[@user-yt8bg3fk9g]

very good

[@Wolcik3000]

love thy neighbor as you love yourself - this just mean that you need to want to good for them as you do for yourself - so don't be nihilistic and then don't do bad stuff to people

[@sakestorm]

They are searching up self-love since they want what they once had before social media

[@MauricioLoboo]

I love your videos and you, but why almost no music ?

[@juliusmulius8335]

I‘m so thankful for the background silence

[@currenttrendsllc]

You can only truly love someone else once you love yourself, because throughout life our ego and pattern recognition have been taught specific ways to think and do actions that display a "loving" characteristic. That becomes a problem because when you are taught to regurgitate instead of give you aren't truly committing the action you are trying to display through regurgitation. To find yourself, to learn who you truly are, and to self-reflect and grow. Teaches you what makes you you. When you find out who you are and you love yourself. It enables you to "TRULY" love someone and to give them your true love, instead of regurgitating what society has deemed a loveable characteristic.

[@Marc42]

Narcissism, the Game :/

[@MarkAlanEffinger]

Such an important piece, Leon. It's true. Not 100%: self esteem is critical. But the narcissism that can arise from swinging the self love pendulum too far. Well, my friend, that's another beast altogether.

[@sakestorm]

If you think what people think about you matters like a presentation you do for school that is giving you anxiety, it's because you are worried what people are thinking about YOU. If the things you talk about are self-absorbed it wouldn't be too assumptive to say that person is also selfish. But is that person even aware that they are selfish? Maybe or maybe not, but I'd like to hope that most people truly don't want to be selfish and will realize that they don't matter that much. We are not immortal, with lifespans typically less than a century, a very mere segment of the entire universes existence. How can people come to the conclusion that they matter that much knowing how short life is...

[@teawe1936]

So good to see your progress which looks really similar to mine. Hope you will find Jesus soon in this whole search :D!

[@user-ib3yo8xv5y]

Why i love myself so much. Give me kiss my lips, oh!..? I forgot, i can't kiss my self😅😅. 😂. So, its impossible to love myself.

[@avinashganedora7081]

Bro i promise I will increase my social skills and I will meet you 😉

[@regina6838]

I think Leon is too young to know the history of this self love movement. I'm sorry to name names, but it needs a historical context. It didn't start with BTS k-pop lyrics. It started with Louise Hay in the 1980s. People ressonated with it because after having a failed relationship it made things "easier". It gave us a "reason" for why the relationship failed. Oh I didn't love myself enough first before getting into a relationship. It's totally looking in the wrong direction. But it's easy to "buy" the idea of self love when you've just spent years giving of yourself to a person who didn't appreciate it. I lost myself in the relationship so after a break up self love "seems" like the answer. And I can see why it would also traumatize a person from not wanting to start another relationship. "I don't live myself enough yet" attitude. It's all messed up in our thinking.

[@theherok_plays]

Yeah people need to get friends instead of being self-obsessed fr

[@kyuubimitch]

I think this format suits you well Leon. More of this.

[@AMAli-ct5df]

Sologamy is a ridiculous idea.

[@UserRjt]

I been missing you Leon wipe that smug off your face smile chap

[@Story_Crow]

l agree, the self-improvement stuff just made me hate my life more and more narcissistic. Now l focus completely on other people and respecting others which makes me respect myself more! l love my self not because l try but because l try my best to love my neighbor as l would myself. so much of what you are saying aligns with the teaching of Jesus Christ

[@utsavpatel6587]

I like your video

[@mrcvillesteve]

2 minutes in and I've Lol'd twice 🤣

[@adhammater4237]

If You're happiness is 1 for example and another person's is also 1, when you become friends it doesn't become 2 or 3, it becomes 4 or 5. Realtioships Are the most dominant factor when measuring happiness,longevity , satisfaction you name it. You need relationships as a human and that's undeniable

[@KofiOteng_]

Sounds Like you read Awareness by Anthony De mello. If you haven’t, I’d highly suggest you to read it. Changes your whole perception of reality and a tuff pill to swallow. It’s worth it !

[@sadanandbared4329]

Abhi ki bar 400 par 🕉️🪷

[@cw4861]

How... how is this just at 10K? I'm confused. This is gold.

[@chotik8062]

no something with animals

[@justsetayesh]

Hi there,new videos are great but care a bit more about the time of them. 20 minutes is great, 30 m makes it a bit boring. Thanks

[@Mirdonwebber]

How this dude doesn’t have 10 million subscribers I’ll never understand!

[@jensrasmussen8082]

first point: I think it is dangerous to base your view of how society works (aka. your ideology) on the behaviour you observe on social media. Social media is not an accurate representaion of the world. Behaviour that seems weird or go to extremes of an ideology or straight up reinterpets them get sensationalized. people's reactions to such behaviour is not accurate either, because certain opinions also recieve more attention. for example marrying yourself is taking "eliminating negative self talk" to the extreme, and the reactions that get the most attention are the ones who either love it to death, or the ones who believe it to be a crime against humanity. There are too many people who see some radlib on twitter say something stupid like "working out is fatphobic" and they make their whole worldview about being on the side that doesn't believe that working out is fatphobic, or meat eaters are going to hell, or whatever dumb stuff people are saying in any given moment. second point: Yes, loneliness enhances depression, and loneliness has been on the rise. The causes can be workplace isolation or social media, but the main contributor to the recent increase is covid. Yes, depression is on the rise, and no, it is not the fault of self-love. The two main symptoms of depression are 1. negative self talk/thoughts (from which self love is the pop-psychology answer to) and 2. the belief that the future will be better. My guess would be that number 2 is the leading cause in the upward trend of depression, since upward social mobillity seems less plausible with higher education being less and less useful and more and more expensive. Political change also appears as implausable with many politicians going back on their promises as soon as they are elected. My third and final point is that you don't have to pick random psychology concepts to reinvent the wheel. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy already exists and it takes into account personal beliefs/mindsets and ironic process theory.

[@stephaniejohanna5783]

Wait I feel like this is almost like a gendered issue. There is a few studies proving women over the age of 40 who are unmarried/single and childless are happier than those are married wirh kids where as for men loneliness is detrimental to their mental health. For me personally I’m very happy with solygamy in a romantic sense and having my amazing friends especially since femicide is insane here in my country it’s just too risky.

[@Sarkartraining]

Those are biased and incorrect studies focusing on rich women who can almost buy their happiness with expensive travels, shopping, spa visits and other such stuff. In a similar sense any study done on millionaire playboys who are unmarried but have loads of money to buy expensive cars, gadgets might "prove" that men are happier alone. But these men and women constitute around only 5% of the population. The remaining 95% of men and women need each other to live a happy and fulfilled life.

[@sbamperez]

When you are 70 and don't have no-one to rely on... Your parents die, your friends die, they have their own lives, they become ill, etc. How will your life be then? Was it worth it? I wonder...

[@chemicaldeath9866]

@@sbamperez ​ I mean we all pass someday, if you are relying on others for happiness you should probably seek a therapist but if your relying on others for survival I mean.... its your time is it not? what would you do if you were a caveman in that situation, pass, thats what🤷‍♂Of course this doesn't apply to literal children because you come out of the womb relying on others, but once you grow up, gain the necessary tools for independence, and then become independent, thats that. Who promised you that you would be let back into dependency with a smile? Better yet what if you dont have a choice? what if you DO go out of your way to make friends and love your family and they STILL all pass before you, or better yet, they are just one of the millions of petty families that dont care about what youve done for them and they let you pass on your own regardless? You cant control other peoples actions, it doesn't matter if you are literally 100x more "enlightened" than Buddha himself, and love thy neighbor so much that you make Jesus look like an embarrassment, even then there is no promise that you wont face THIS SAME FATE of loneliness, the only argument you've made is that other peoples actions are her (the original commentors) fault😂

[@sbamperez]

​@@chemicaldeath9866 Are you gonna stop trying just because the world does not offer a guarantee? To me that's pitiful... Not to your offense but rather than discarding everything that's not within your power, isn't it better to even still try as many times as it gets? I'm not a caveman and I won't ever pretend to be, I want a meaningful life. I want to use all that our ancestors created to make a better tomorrow for me and my loved ones. I can't force you to see life outside of that relativistic & pessimistic outlook, you can't force me to see from that lens either. I want people to rely on me, I want to care for others and make them feel safe. I also want to be cared for by people when I fall down. I don't need no guarantee, I don't need to pay attention to the what-if's, I don't need to logically justify it, It's a non-negotiable. For as long as I breathe. All your efforts will be rewarded.

[@stephaniejohanna5783]

@@sbamperez I worked in age care… and yeah that’s a very selfish reason to get married and have kids

[@emilis173]

i somehow feel this isn't going to get a lot of views. Still, great video with a lot of very solid points

[@jewelbency5072]

Why do you think evolutionary we have a need for purpose to be happy?

[@Jiqzaw]

🎉🎉

[@sircostco9957]

Go back doing old videos they where very good

[@AMAli-ct5df]

I, self, me, Destructive words

[@ecoconatus8089]

Important converstion, thank you. Brahmacharia path can be beautiful when done in Service for Life and accompagnied with intense apiritual practices. I agree that without these i gredients it can amplify narcistic traits

[@ahmedbutixr7132]

this is video is underrated

[@Yuji012]

Letsss Gooo

[@RyanHarville]

It's because people have left God to "think for themselves". They didn't want to be "tied down". So now we have higher rates of depression, suicide, cheating, thievery, corporate greed, overall selfishness. I'm including Christians in this as well.

[@RyanHarville]

It's also why Christ says, "Deny yourself". There's a huge reason He said that.