Lethal Borderline Traits | Kimberly Cargill Case Analysis

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This video answers the question: Can I analyze the case of Kimberly Cargill?
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[@theglobalvagabond3074]

This video inspired me to write a book! It will be called; "Stay single, trust no one, avoid large crowds, and dedicate the rest of your life to life long learning and personal development." Kinda long but has a nice ring to it!

[@criticRN]

Sounds like a bestseller to me 👍🏽

[@yuuya2111]

Do write it. I am living that life now.

[@quantumfineartsandfossils2152]

feels.. there are statistics that criminal abusers attract more of them this is a fact abusers stranger criminal abusers get drawn to you via them they also try to commit crimes against you & often do- then just like these criminals they literally try to blame their behavior on you while you are trying not to die & * that is all you have the time energy to do* you have no idea what the fuck is going on working your ass of every second of your life to stay alive healthy

[@mario-qi3yw]

I stick with “Stay Single”😂😂😂

[@amyprice3661]

I would be the first in line to purchase the book- long title and all!!!!!

[@marytygett4189]

The fact that she was a nurse is scary too .

[@rtyria]

Says something about the hospital that she could pass their background checks with a history like that.

[@karenabrams8986]

I’ve worked in five different hospital and from my perspective doing laboratory work half of the nurses are crayzeeee

[@matthoward8546]

oh my gosh especially since the nursing shortage ..Some of the people form my neighborhood are now working in nursing homes. It's frightening who takes care of us sometimes. Eventually they get caught stealing pills.

[@karenking5357]

That's what I thought. I've been in the hospital many times...to think I could have possibly had a nurse like THAT...OH MY GOSH!! The real crisis besides Cherry, of course, are those four boys....I hope they all have a good home with tons of be love.... unbelievable

[@paradoxlove1]

Something to that effect in my comment , I am an RN and I think psychological testing should be done on prospective nursing students . I’ve never met so many unstable, despicable people as I have in Nursing please note however the term Nurse is misleading very often sometimes they are a nurse’s assistant not a nurse The more men that come into the field the better off the profession will be however because the women are back stabbing vicious manipulative

[@annal7364]

I had a friend like this in college. She would treat me like her best friend, then find a new friend, ignore me, and blame me for something. I would pull away and she would love bomb me by apologizing, making excuses for her behavior, and buying me things or inviting me places. She continued yanking me around for about a year when I finally said enough. She would contact me constantly after this, but I ignored her. I felt bad because I was always taught to be patient and kind but she was toxic. She finally gave up a few months later. Her behavior toward me was abusive. I hope people can identify these behaviors through Dr. G’s helpful videos and get out of a harmful relationship, romantic or not.

[@rejaneoliveira5019]

I had a friend exactly like this, it took me years to finally get away from her.🤦🏻‍♀️ I am glad it’s over for you as well, it is indeed very toxic.

[@annal7364]

@@rejaneoliveira5019 I’m so glad you took care of yourself and stuck to your boundaries. It’s hard when the pull of compassion is so strong but it’s important to protect yourself! I can certainly see how people get roped into this vicious cycle of abuse. Some never get out of it.

[@LMCEK]

Me too. I had a friend like this, growing up from ages 7 to 17. I always consider her to be the first person who ever broke my heart when I was just a little kid. I would get a higher grade on a project in school and she would punish me by not speaking to me and turning all our friends against me. I remember the pain of her rejection was so bad. Later on I got involved with men who treated me just as badly. I let her back into my life in our late 20s, and she started pulling the same crap in an adult version. I cut her off and will never again go back.

[@Chris-tg3qy]

@@LMCEK Good for you. I had a friend like that too. I never knew before arriving at school if she was going to be mad at me for something. Most people liked her so if she was mad at me, that meant her other friends would be mad too. I finally decided she wasn’t worth it and found a really sweet girl to be friends with. I learned a valuable lesson. It was better to be on my own than abused. She was mean and rude to me for a while, and then moved on to other victims when she realized I just didn’t care. I think today, she would be described as a narcissist.

[@MusgraveRitual]

Same here. It was so difficult because I moved to a new country where I didn't know anyone and I was soooo happy to have made a friend. Then she would disappear and not return my calls. I constantly thought I did or said something wrong or culturally unacceptable and that's what made her mad. Three weeks would pass, and she would surface like nothing happened and we were always bestest friends and all of this was a normal way to treat people. It was so hurtful. But like you said, it did help me identify these behaviors, even though it took away my trusting nature. I guess that's part of being alive and growing up. People are the worst.

[@TheNicolevertone]

It's a pity that Kimberly didn't put all of that energy and planning into actually being a good mom.

[@macnchessplz]

Kimberly strikes me as the type to get pregnant by a man in hopes it’ll cause him to stick around OR just to have a permanent connection to Father of the child. I also find it curious that her Mother left her Father when Kimberly was 12. I wonder if there is a connection to the parental divorce that contributed to her personality disorder?

[@Stichting_NoFap]

it was because of her disorders, so she didn't have the decision to replace everything with good behavior.

[@aarondavis8943]

These church people seem to copulate like rabbits. Some churches are no more than swinger hook-up communities. It offends my modesty as an atheist.

[@Golden_Girl7123]

That's beneath her. Requires work

[@netta96]

That fear of abandonment is extremely powerful and subconsciously driven. But she's still responsible for her behavior

[@TaDarling1]

I remember seeing the story of Kimberly Cargill on two different reality crime shows. During the penalty phase of her trial one of her younger sons testified that "there was never a day when he wasn't afraid." It was heartbreaking. That woman was a monster.

[@criticRN]

Oh how awful for those children - imagine living with that kind of fear and insecurity! She’s a very dangerous character.

[@margolucas3793]

Why do people like this have children?!

[@TaDarling1]

@@margolucas3793 To use them. She had multiple sons by different fathers and on the crime show Snapped, they said from the time she was a teen, she had this pattern of getting pregnant to get each of the fathers to marry her but none of her marriages lasted and she started using the kids to hurt each of her ex-husbands. It was just all about her.

[@Strype13]

The fact that people can look into incredibly obvious cases like this and come out thinking, "nah, I'm still pretty sure she's innocent and telling the truth" is downright mind-boggling. It is beyond evident that this woman spent her entire life lying and manipulating people, but then when she finally snaps and murders someone, these people somehow decide to overlook all of the facts and assume she just happens to be telling the truth this time around? I don't get it.

[@johntaranto29]

I agree with you. In the legal sense though, you try to keep the crime in focus, and not go too far into past history.

[@pebblepod30]

It is bc a lot of society sees women as innocent & as victims, not as perpetrators or as responsible for their actions. Unfortunately. It is a view that appears to be promoted by most feminists, even if they deny it. Now Trans Activists are using the same manipulative techniques with success & to gain advantage & suppress any questioning of their agenda. None if this is one bit necessary for any issues that more effect any group.

[@johntaranto29]

@@pebblepod30 when grande said the son tried to call the police and they just believed her "Wild child" story it reminded me of my mother, who is a control freak with Narcissistic traits, she's called the cops on me and would lie and exagerate. I have substance abuse disorder, and she would basically try to get me sent away all the time. Its terrifying having armed men bust in and just believe her claims with no evidence because shes good looking.

[@johntaranto29]

@@pebblepod30 I swear its like socially acceptable to let women abuse their children

[@hanfred]

@@pebblepod30 What agenda exactly? Having the same rights as non trans people? That's a pretty reasonable agenda.

[@WelfareChrist]

It’s horrible what happened to Cherry but her bravery in standing up for those kids might have honestly saved their lives. Good on her.

[@TiffWaffles]

Cherry is definitely a hero and she was murdered because of it. There was a news article I found where the prosecutor was speaking about this case where they said that 'Cherry left a legacy of protection for her killer's children'... and I think that speaks volumes about who Cherry was as a person. She probably stood her ground and Kimberly couldn't stand that.

[@Ricksmomie]

I've worked with a mother like this in my field of work. Very black and white thinking. She could be the nicest most loving person but once her partner or child threatened to pull their love away from her, it got ugly. Quick. She couldn't control herself. Very sad.

[@kathyclark8274]

B&W thinking is pretty typical for borderlines. Relationships are usually tumultuous, all or none, love/hate. First they place the object of adoration on a pedestal, then devalue them as lower than pond scum.

[@kathyclark8274]

Nate Stanish: If I had that client, I would be very, very uneasy.

[@thefxmua4269]

That’s part of having borderline personality disorder - black and white thinking and splitting. It’s real hard for those suffering and those on the receiving end of the behaviours 💔

[@annedenman3312]

Truly, I don't know what makes some people tick. It is hard for me to comprehend going out of my way to harm someone. Even having ill feelings towards someone makes me feel dreadful about myself.

[@chaucernerd1690]

This woman is scary. Knowing what her children endured, as well as anyone else in her life, is horrifying.

[@tulinbeyduz920]

My mum was BPD , I was removed and put into care for ten years . She left me in nz to start a new life in Australia with my brother ..

[@carolnahigian9518]

I had a ( unknown to me!) borderLine female Aquaintence- very son she Taped Notes to my House! car! 15 text per Day! Finally i told her ' this isnot Okay!- good - Bye Lynne Dudack you were Over- the- TOP!!!

[@ursodermatt8809]

the word "borderline" in the title is misleading. she is absolutely not borderline.

[@patwats8860]

Living with her would be like living in a hurricane. The damage to the children must have been incredible. A friend was diagnosed as BPD and it WAS mercurial! I distanced.

[@chaucernerd1690]

@@tulinbeyduz920 that’s rough. I’m so sorry. I worked for CPS in Texas for about a year and had one client with diagnosed BPD and I had to remove her child. I hope you’re well and happy now.

[@rayross997]

"Poor decision maker of the year", that hit home with me Dr. Grande. Life is a learning process and I was a slow learner.

[@16voyeur]

Nah--don't be so hard on yourself. Life is difficult.

[@LouisGiliberto]

Some of us, including myself in this, have to learn the hard way. That's not bad, just is. The important thing is we learn. Some people never learn. Stay safe, brother.

[@MsShandy111]

Yes, I'm still learning.

[@judethaddeus9856]

No, you’re not a « slow learner », you simply learn at a different pace and in a different way than others you know 💕

[@neledemeulemeester754]

You'd be surprised just how many of us 'slow learners' are out there...

[@sawychuck9797]

"in order to win poor decision maker of the year, he decided to move in with kimberly" thank you for that killer one liner, dr grande

[@lizsharma8867]

💀 ⚰️ 😂

[@rhondasisco-cleveland2665]

Terrifying that she was a mother and nurse.

[@chikacherrycola9189]

I have ‘BPD’ & I WISH I had been Diagnosed sooner!! I went through several erratic Relationships but, I have been in Counseling for about 15 years now~I can ALWAYS see the EPIC mistakes in my rear view mirror….Luckily❤️ My Psych-Nurse Practitioner (She’s Wonderful:) gave me the BEST advise!! She told me “I am NOT defined by my past.” ‘THIS’😘 Therapy, Exercise, Antidepressants & being Mindful has made such a difference!! I still have ‘BPD Depression & PTSD’ (VIOLENT Childhood) but?? I can have AWESOME Days, A Good Life and MAKE The Right Choices!! Today I was Sad but please know? Your Videos are Fantastic, Your Voice is Calming, Your Sarcasm is Epic & Your Podcasts bring a much needed light to the complexity of The Mind & The Soul🌿

[@duvessa2003]

I feel for you. You are doing all of the right things. Best 🍀

[@trgiun]

I have it too and I feel the same hearing these stories. I so easily am haunted by those things and feel the urge to recreate it with my wonderful, understanding bf. We can be better 🥲 we’re already better than our disorder by being aware of it and trying to avoid its harm ❤

[@thebigt3706]

My maternal grandmother was borderline and always beat up my grandfather. I know it doesn't make it right, but they loved each other. They were married for forty eight years until her death. She was deeply flawed, but loved children and volunteered so much in her community to help kids. There was good in her, and there was real love between her and my grandfather. I miss them both so much.

[@quantumfineartsandfossils2152]

damn

[@quantumfineartsandfossils2152]

I could not tolerate that but as you probably thought maybe she was tortured & he put up with it because most of the time she was o k many abused people become even worse than their abusers this is so hard for ppl like us who have 0 mental illness with criminals coming at us from all sides because of them

[@THE-id1by]

Great that you can be so open and empathetic. I would caution against emulating the behavior or tolerating abuse in your life. It can be very dangerous.

[@donsmith9194]

I have to ask, was your grandfather deeply sad at her passing?

[@trgiun]

As someone with bpd that has abused a past boyfriend, I did love him more than i had anyone before. Borderlines don’t show their love the right way, and it’s SO disconnected we sometimes abuse when we don’t understand our disorder. Your grandma came from a time where there wasn’t much awareness or help compared to now. I’m in a relationship with the love of my life now who I DONT abuse and want to take care of despite the disconnections in my brain. Sounds like your grandma just didn’t have the tools. And I’m sure your grandpa loved her very very much, I’ve had a couple men in my life love me unconditionally despite the disorder and it takes a special man

[@betterbee1304]

Thank you for having such a soothing voice Dr Grande. I can still listen to your videos while having a migraine. ❤️ Sounds like a tumultuous case.

[@guardiansanimalrescuestate7289]

I fall asleep many times some nights.

[@ashleysmith7903]

Then you're probably not having a migraine.

[@scott8919]

Every time I have a migraine nothing helps me more than listening to a man describe in detail various murders.

[@lizp637]

me too, always go to sleep to him talking. so soothing

[@cinqueterre4060]

Agree 100%

[@roguechevelle]

My ex-husband was diagnosed borderline personality after years of being told he was just bipolar (most psychiatrists thought because he was male he didn't have it, they never even considered it until our couples counseling) he had 8 of the 9 borderline traits and ranked high on the narcissist spectrum. After years of gaslighting and manipulation I finally got out of there but I realized as much as I went through that nobody knew went on behind closed doors I'm lucky I'm still here. These individuals on the more extreme side of the spectrum can be very dangerous. The time when the divorce was about to be finalized was the time I feared the most for revenge against me for whatever imagined slight he held or because he didn't want me to get away unscathed. And he was the one who initially asked for a divorce but weeks later after I moved out acted like I was the one who was doing this to him. I still sometimes will get a strange feeling and worry I will look over my shoulder to see him there but I don't constantly have to walk on eggshells anymore scared to do or say something or do nothing at all and set him off. So I can't even imagen what it was like for these poor kids with Kimberly and what they had to endure. And the poor woman she murdered.

[@emmagatewood3898]

My bpd ex husband also was the one to file for divorce, and even changed the locks on our home. Several weeks afterwards he started acting like I was the one abandoning him, asking how DARE I give up on our marriage and why was I leaving him after all we'd been through, telling me he loved me, blah blah blah. I'd remind him that he was the one who initiated this, and I'd get a blank stare. Then he'd start in with the "how could you do this to me" stuff. He was hardcore stalking me as well ... These people are just so next level mental. I'm glad you made it out safe.

[@b.boston8529]

My ex tantrumed a lot, but a lot of it is acting to get their way. I believe there is a very high level of narcissism and sociopathy, or malignant narcissism, for them to be this manipulative, deceptive, dangerous and abusive.

[@helpyourcattodrive]

I like Grande’s videos about chaotic families bc I come from one. I bailed out of my crazy family and away from my destructive mother 40 years ago. Phew! These videos are great reminders for me of how well I’ve done despite those chaotic beginnings. What a horrible story this is. Horrible.

[@bthomson]

Hope the kitty is comforting?

[@tinawindham6958]

Yes…my mother was traumatizing isolating everyone from each other but her. She would accuse me of being the reason her sister wasn’t speaking to her. I’ve thought she was paranoid schizo narcissistic for about 20 years. She started telling me how much she hated me when I was 5 but she doesn’t like women in general. It’s exhausting . She has no boundaries but keeps her secrets locked up tight, she thinks👍🏻

[@NatashaCreatesThings]

Way to go, getting away; i did that too about five years ago, it’s so hard but for me I had to, my mom is a toxic borderline (probably not scary but definitely toxic)

[@helpyourcattodrive]

Yup, just walk away. My mom and bros never made an iota of effort to think about, never mind correcting, their behavior. No accountability from them. She and my bros said, “You think you’re better than us.” I’m like, “why? Bc I’m clean, educated, not drunk and stoned and practice yoga a lot and eat health food and try to have nice friends?” Also, luckily, my mom wasn’t violent. She was just a checked-out weirdo. My bros bc violent, though. So, I left. My story could be good Grande case study of how great a person can do if they adhere to decency and truth and other good habits.

[@bthomson]

Good for you!🎖🏆🏅

[@sstteev]

"The relationship was characterized by violence" followed immediately by "they had a son" is so tragic.

[@margolucas3793]

Yes! Why?

[@oliverquach9614]

I really hate it when parents weaponize their children to hurt their ex-partners, it’s selfish, irresponsible and immature.

[@daniellavaladez7820]

And absolutely sickening

[@eadweard.]

Everyone hates it. You might as well say you hate murder.

[@DEPARTMENTOFREDUNDANCYDEPT]

"Romance has a way of clouding judgement!" This statement qualifies for entry into the "Understatement of the Year" Awards.

[@kathyberney5093]

My mother had a violent form of BPS. My brother was the victim of the worst of her outrage, but my sister and I were obviously victimized as well. Borderlines are exceptionally good at convincing outsiders of their rationality and justifications. But behind closed doors, all decent behavior is off the table. Thank you for your concise profile of a violent and deceitful borderline mother. The catharsis is truly helpful.

[@margyeoman3564]

So true. And so destructive and ruinous.

[@Nylak-Otter]

Spot on with my mother who also had violent BPD. I met my then future-fiancee when I was 9, and since then I had told her a little bit of all the nonsense that went on in my house, and her mother never believed a thing I said (and my friend had serious doubts). My mother was always kind, socially outgoing, and very upbeat, and would bemoan to anyone who asked about the subject of my occasional comments how much of a problem child I was, despite being spoiled rotten. When my fiancée actually was present for the first time at one of her episodes and saw me react casually with a firearm and my professional working dog as if old Western standoffs were a day-to-day occurrence in my life for the last two decades, she finally believed me.

[@kathyberney5093]

I’ve never owned firearms, which is fortunate because my mother came after us with knives. Who knows what would have happened? My husband still does not believe me regarding my mother after 22 years of marriage. My mother has recently passed of natural causes, but one thing she had in spades was superficial charm. My adolescent friends thought my mom was an innocuous hoot. At that age, I didn’t share the truth.

[@svenskanorsk]

This was my mother as well

[@kathyberney5093]

It is amazing how these mothers can fool outsiders. I hope you are doing well. It’s not easy.

[@estrellacollective]

can we just talk about how adorable it is to watch dr. grande cook dinner?! the little bunny salt and pepper shakers are killin me! 😂🥰

[@aking4766]

it was literally the FIRST YT meal prep ad that I not only fully watched, but throughly enjoyed!

[@estrellacollective]

@@aking4766 SAME! i loved it so much i had to leave a comment. (and honestly, the food didn't look so impressive, it was dr grande and his bunnies that were the real mvp's.

[@peggypasson8794]

I am very familiar with the borderline personality . They can ruin an entire family . No medication for a personality disorder ! Ugh they can be so nice but they will an do use everything you say against you . They twist your words . So unpredictable it's very sad

[@bdml77]

They're only "nice" when they're manipulating you to get back in your favor so they can go on to mistreat and abuse you more

[@mamapetillo8675]

Love this channel. No frills. Just calm reason. And cacti.

[@tmajcan94]

I never found listening to someone talk about Hello Fresh to be so relaxing until now. Another great video as always Dr. Grande.

[@diannt9583]

I never saw anyone cut asparagus stalks so deliberately! But I enjoyed this Hello Fresh ad more than most of those.

[@girlygal098]

🤓👍 IKR?

[@bthomson]

Did everyone notice the adorable bunny salt and peppers?

[@kimberlycarr4254]

@@bthomson LOL! Me!!

[@AntoDesormeaux]

@@bthomson I was hoping that somebody had commented about this, so cute

[@annal7364]

I think of an unpredictable person like a popping fire. At times, it’s safe to be close and at other times a hot coal jumps out and burns you, but it’s hard to walk away because at least the fire is keeping you warm. You hang in there hoping the popping will stop, but there’s always another one right when you start to relax. How long should you sit there hoping/worrying? The answer seems to be different for everyone.

[@karenking5357]

THAT'S why many women (especially) stay in volitile relationship....it's that warm and cozy feeling that HOPE enters the woman...then "he" gets angry all of a sudden and out comes those firey explosive coals.....been there 😭 very difficult when you're in the midst

[@cottontails9003]

Anna, great analogy.

[@yeahB]

@@karenking5357.... or why men stay....

[@LDiamondz]

You describe this type of person perfectly. You're right, it's different for every one. Some people waste their entire lives on people like this. Nobody deserves that. ❤

[@LDiamondz]

@@cht2162 hmmm..you look familiar. We're you commenting on Will Smith hitting Kevin Hart at the Oscars, before? That would make a good topic for Dr.Grand..

[@ava198]

Very sad. Cherry didn't deserve that. I feel bad for those boys too. I wonder what kind of childhood Kimberly had that she was repeating with her kids. No one wishes to grow up with mental illness nor be abused. I hope her sons are healing and happy now.

[@co9971]

there's an interview with Cherry's parents somewhere on youtube. they seemed like really nice, old people. they said Cherry loved that kid.

[@Mountlougallops]

It took me 3 X’s playing this case in order to keep track of all of the characters. I’m so sorry that anyone has fallen into this woman’s web.

[@maureeningleston1501]

Is it just me who gets chills up my spine that people like this exist in society!! :((

[@bthomson]

No.

[@alexkester]

@@wallybingbang4350 I suffer from BPD and I'm not like this woman. Stop trying to make all people with a specific mental illness look like monsters.

[@alexkester]

@@wallybingbang4350 in your original statement you posted "if you meet a borderline run like hell". That's you stigmatizing a group. Don't swap the blame to therapists. This is a statement you made. Just be more considerate.

[@alexkester]

@@wallybingbang4350 they are not all the same. Your anecdotal evidence isn't everyone.

[@alexkester]

@@wallybingbang4350 and I want a life where people don't assume the worst out of someone based on their diagnosis.

[@kathymclain2632]

I live in the same town as she did and often pass the area of road where she killed that poor lady. So terrible.

[@user-cs1un6sp1wRennata]

"Romance has a way of clouding judgment" .. Excellent analysis Dr. Grande! Thank you! 🖤

[@garydomaz1849]

OMG HE DID IT! I asked on a pervious video if he’d cover this case and he did! OMG I’m in total shock! THANK YOU SO MUCH DR. GRANDE! JOINING YOUR PATREON RIGHT NOW!

[@rebirthoftragedy]

You'll be glad you did. Patreon is awesome.

[@patriciabuuck5277]

Now Dr Grande please cover the two Edie Beales!!! I've been asking for quite some time.

[@cass964]

Nice, two Dr. Grande videos in one day. That's what I'm talking about.

[@kaylawolf7689]

❤️❤️❤️

[@auntielaura5]

In my opinion just hiring Cherry as your babysitter should be proof of neglect. (She was subject to seizures and needed a caregiver herself!). That Cherry was soooo much better than his actual mother is horrifying and heartbreaking.

[@punky19761]

Fails at becoming a nurse (the first time anyway) and still manages to kill a disabled person. I guess somewhere along the way someone decided oh yeah she’s totally fine to be a nurse. As a disabled person, I feel that’s typical, but it also pisses me off. 🤬

[@Good_Vibes...]

Pure evil is a way to describe Kimberly. I find learning about the human brain (limbic system) interesting along with psychology highly interesting in understanding human behavior. Thank you Dr. Grande for explaining the details of her personality.

[@wrmlm37]

How odd to be "inside" of this woman's thought processes. The "bottom" must have always been falling out for this woman. Deadly personality profile.

[@shayb413]

I will never be able to understand how a Mother or Parent's thinking and actions can become so twisted like this or other cases. Thanks for another quality video and cautionary tale Dr. G, you are incredible as always! 🤓🌵❤️

[@lnc-to4ku]

What an absolute walking nightmare she is! Just spent her life leaving a path of destruction! It's beyond heartbreaking what her children had to suffer from their own mother, not to mention poor, innocent Cherry! Incredible video Dr. Grande, your work is always incredibly captivating! ♡ (Always love your Hello Fresh videos too) :)

[@margyeoman3564]

Seen her type, and add the self- pity party to draw in people to use.

[@13elad49]

Wow! My past relationship with a woman was clearly BPD. Flying into a rage over imagined slights, with violence then begging for forgiveness, phew! Not in favor of capital punishment, Kimberly is right where she belongs.

[@toniemorrison4263]

"Romance has a way of clouding judgement." Dr. Grande, you've spoken words to live by as usual. Will you cover the death of Taylor Hawkins? I love the Foos and Nirvana. Of course, I didn't know Taylor personally, but my heart is heavy nevertheless. Maybe you can shed some light on addiction, and why some of us over identify with celebrities. As always, I'd appreciate your perspective. 👍

[@jasmincampbell8105]

It's amazing how many people are willing to give just about ANYBODY the benefit of a doubt

[@netta96]

Many times it's out of ego. They thunk they can somehow change the person.

[@charmee4045]

Just spent 5 years with a Borderline, single for the rest of my life...........still reeling 2 years out. I cannot imagine living with this disorder, hell on earth and certainly for anyone in your orbit. If someone seems too good to be true, run like your hair is on fire. Trust your gut. You will never be the same otherwise.

[@ercellsomerville6271]

Borderline Personality Disorder is so destructive for the individual as well as those around him/her. It’s very sad. DBT can help if person really wants to change-but the person should be around otherwise “healthy” people.😔

[@janelleyharris5042]

I get a feeling of a pit in my stomach when I start Dr. Grande's videos and I already get a visceral response to the outrageous crap people do to each other. Especially when it involves children!

[@existenceispainforameeseeks]

I used to be close friends with someone who has borderline personality disorder until she chased me around the basement with a butter knife.

[@kellyanni5092]

OK so she picked the two worst jobs she could for herself mother and nurse? That is frightening. Thanks Dr. G Have a great week😉

[@azulgaia7782]

I just have to pause the video so say your Hello Fresh ad is so sweet. Just knowing there's a professional man taking care to methodically prepare his dinner makes me feel grounded.

[@wendywhite4929]

Wow what a story. I like how you tell it with mostly “just the facts ma’am “ as I was instructed to in DBT.

[@oldhick9047]

"A situation like this" Why yes, just last week my wife tried to kill me with the family automobile

[@aliasno.4andover644]

Get a Lawyer.

[@bthomson]

Although seemingly hard to believe, there are so many of these devastating stories! Violence seems very close to the surface with some people!

[@angelawatson1594]

Take it seriously

[@ZYX84]

Dr. Grande, I thoroughly enjoy your analytical humorous sensitive precise analysis… Never once have you failed me! Thank you so much for your hard work and dedication.

[@queenreg7]

Watching these videos makes me so much more tolerant of my own shortcomings.

[@ravenID429]

Ikr, like at least my bad habits don’t affect anyone but me😅

[@BeholdenProductions]

Wouldn’t be surprised if Cherry’s disabilities factored into the murder. With BPD/NPD many can see people with disabilities as less than or even disposable. Truly despicable what happened to Cherry, especially given Kimberly had such a long history of violence it’s shocking she got away with so many aggressions for so long. An innocent person lost their life because this woman was devolving unchecked for so long…

[@lindsay8583]

BPD and NPD are not the same. Maybe take a psychology class before you spew stigmatizing BS on the internet.

[@BeholdenProductions]

@@lindsay8583 No, of course they are not the same. But as cluster B personality disorders they do share some similarities. We’re talking a pretty extreme case here, most people (living with a disorder or not) do not commit murder, so these are traits to an extreme in her case. I didn’t share anything about my credentials, so that’s quite an assumption to make about my background 😉 I certainly don’t assume anything about yours, though I figure you must also be fairly engaged in the space if you’re watching Dr Grande videos so I welcome the dialogue 😌

[@CEO_of_Autism_]

Please stop generalizing, as if all people with BPD are the same. That is an incredibly ignorant assumption. I don't know anyone else with BPD who views people with disabilities as disposable, and I have no clue where you got that idea (which you've presented as a fact). It is people like you who further stigmatize these disorders, which leads to the prevention of the patients seeking help, due to said stigma and ignorance.

[@BeholdenProductions]

@@CEO_of_Autism_ I address this in my reply to H above, the context of her case is an extreme presentation. Most people do not commit murder, regardless of whether they have any conditions or disorders. I work in this field and have people I love with these diagnoses who have to process varying degrees of challenges. I am by no means saying this is fact for all but it can often happen in extreme cases. This is an extreme case (it involves murder). I hope that helps clarify my intention in my comment. The context of this video and its subject matter is important. Thanks for weighing in, I appreciate the dialogue 😌

[@ravenID429]

@@lindsay8583BPD *SLASH* NPD, as in, either or. I’m so sick of this “stigmatizing” nonsense🙄

[@davel7014]

Kimberly was very able to convince people that she was fine and they kept giving the kids back to her. Surprised she didn't end up killing any of those kids during her many violent attacks.

[@chloeblack2615]

This case is heart breaking. I’m diagnosed borderline, and prior to treatment I was volatile and hard to manage for anyone in my life. But I never physically hurt anyone, only emotionally. I would lash out from an extreme fear of abandonment. Post treatment I had amazing recovery from symptoms, no mood swings, no out burst, able to start and run my business the last 3 years. Married now, we talk all our disagreements out. Two fights in two years. I have a son with my husband, and I never raise my voice or hand to him. I adore him like the treasure of my life and hope to raise him in a way that he doesn’t suffer with a diagnosis. But cases like this, it’s hard to think I share a diagnosis with this person. I don’t let anyone in my life know of my diagnosis outside of my direct family. Just because I don’t want them to google it and find this..

[@Whol3NothaL3v3l]

It would be very interesting to get a count of how many times people have been killed or injured because the police have returned them back to horrifically dangerous environments. I have hear this theme in a few stories. Especially with children. I forget the child's name, but one little boy ended up being killed by his mother and her boyfriend after the child services and the police refused to save him. The police officers told him he was a bad kid. So this 2nd grader dies because of all the adults who failed him.

[@karenking5357]

Sooooo sad

[@kuroneko7022]

That was little Gabriel Fernandez! That child begged for help and was ignored. They have his death on the books in California as the most horrific case of child abuse in the State. Everyone failed that poor baby!😢

[@TheVirgo91]

Do the Will and Chris situation please

[@bluevioletandlilac]

It should REALLY be harder to become a nurse. My mother was in the ICU after major surgery and there was literally only one nurse that seemed sane out of all of them. There needs to be some kind of psychological screening.

[@margolucas3793]

“Romance has a way of clouding judgment,” is the understatement of the year!

[@giovannicarosa8819]

My ex-wife was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder about five years after we were married! It messed me up and the relationship was absolute hell. She did really good at hiding it until after we were married.

[@2anthro]

That's what they do. I won't even go into my mother's behavior. Everyone was relieved when she died.

[@giovannicarosa8819]

@@2anthro Wow….that’s sad….but I can emphasize with you!

[@bthomson]

I always sit forward and concentrate on these videos. Feel as though I learn so much.

[@cottontails9003]

They are good too watch. Have a happy day /evening.

[@bthomson]

CT - 😍😻👍💙💚💛💐

[@alistairbalistair9596]

my "mother" has borderline personality disorder. I feel sorry for any child that has a mother with it.

[@fxceghost]

I just want to quickly point out that not everyone with BPD is a horrible person and a lot do get treatment and hold themselves accountable for their actions. This is a very stigmatizing statement to make and generalizes all of us with the disorder (which no one chooses to have). Regardless of that though, I am genuinely very sorry that said woman didn’t treat you the way every child deserves (with love, care, acceptance, etc.). There are absolutely awful people out there who have BPD (just as there are awful people & parents who don’t). I really hope this doesn’t come off as an attack towards you! I only wanted to point that out that it can be harmful to make generalizing statements about not only BPD, but all mental disorders. That’s my sole intention as a mental health advocate.

[@alistairbalistair9596]

@@fxceghost youre right, sorry. I think my hate for my mother clouds my thinking when i am writing about it.

[@fxceghost]

@@alistairbalistair9596 omg no that’s okay. you don’t have to apologize! I totally understand why you and others would feel the way you do. I only want to educate where I can. No one deserves to be on the receiving end of the manipulation and abuse that a person with BPD can exhibit. I’m lucky enough that I realized my problems earlier in my life and have had time to accept the things I’ve done wrong and change my ways. I hope one day your mother admits to & accepts her issues so she can receive the treatment she needs to be a better mother/person. And if she doesn’t, you’re better off without her! My heart goes out to you ❤️

[@alistairbalistair9596]

@@fxceghost you sound like youre on the right path :) I'm happy for you, really am.

[@fxceghost]

@@alistairbalistair9596 thank you so much 🥺 it’s taken a lot of time, hard work, and introspection, but it’s worth it to me if it means not hurting the people I love. I only wish more people with the disorder could have the same attitude towards getting better, but it’s easier to just ignore it and keep telling themselves they’re doing nothing wrong because they have a mental illness. I really appreciate you for hearing me out!

[@sarahspencer1010]

Wow!!! How could she keep finding boyfriends???

[@SouthernOregonOrgani]

This is actually one of my worst fears. You usually never know who people really are after it’s too late. Had a close call with some one super unstable, but luckily it never went any further than being sent incredibly manipulative texts

[@yogadork_namaste]

How about don't beat and strangle your kids if you don't want to lose them? I don't understand how people can be this awful. That's why I am always watching these videos.

[@zosoart]

Just to let you guys know, not everyone with Borderline Personality Disorder is like this! Edit: before telling me that I have been misdiagnosed, take a moment to think how damaging and hurtful that could be. BPD is something I know a lot about, so please do not belittle me or others like me for trying to speak up and stop misinformation from being spread.

[@joan-lisa-smith]

Then they don't actually have BPD and have been misdiagnosed, these traits are what BPD is, if you don't have the traits you don't have the disorder.

[@zosoart]

@@joan-lisa-smith I have BPD. BPD is a spectrum of symptoms. You are misinformed and fundamentally incorrect.

[@katyr2382]

@@zosoart Yes, from my memory it has 9 qualifying traits and you need 5 (or more) to be diagnosed so you could skip this type of characteristic

[@zosoart]

@@katyr2382 exactly! Also, the severity of each symptom can differ from one person to the next. It's like saying everyone with anxiety has debilitating panic attacks. It's simply not true. Every mental health disorder is a spectrum. It's so dangerous to spread misinformation that can lead to prejudice, like Jo Pearson is doing.

[@larissapasieta80]

I'm thinking it's highly possible whomever isn't like this with BPD have undergone severe dialectical therapy or just been misdiagnosed. Most part this is how we are. Except I never put my hands on my child. Completely against child abuse.

[@novaguy509]

I spent 4 years with a women diagnosed with BPD. It was the most stressful period of my life.

[@susie1370]

What her son , Jamie, said about Kim in another documentary, was quite compelling! He doesn't call her his mom or call her Mom, he hates her!

[@jonnawyatt]

"Divorce support group at the local church" 😄 How appropriate

[@wendybond2848]

I feel so sorry for her children. Traumatised for life by the person who should be their protector.

[@zenawarrior7442]

I remember this case but your analysis & insights always bring new light to them. Happy Sunday. Thanks Dr G😊🤎🤎

[@cottontails9003]

Hello, my friend, less than two months too go before we meet our baby.

[@zenawarrior7442]

@@cottontails9003 Hello yes almost here😊💚💛💚💛

[@tx189]

Stay single guys I hear and see stories like this over and over again.

[@emilyhollis4231]

I just might get hello fresh now! I love watching you cook, Dr Grande. omg is that weird? Did I just make it weird? 🤦🏻‍♀️. 😊

[@celesteshenas2155]

Why does this man have to cook for himself?

[@shayb413]

It is NOT WEIRD, unless I'm weird too. Maybe we're weird? Lol I think it's always fun to get a little peak into any other aspect esp as little as Dr. G ever talks about himself or his life, natural curiosity is all I think! As long as you aren't trying to look into his WINDOW to see him cooking, I think it's fine to appreciate watching! Lol 😂

[@ZYX84]

@@shayb413 howdy there, click on her picture… She’s an oddball I believe… I suppose all of us are but what the F…?

[@lizsharma8867]

😂

[@Missliz441]

Wow! Great timing, I was in the middle of watching another video of yours when this one popped up!

[@yogadork_namaste]

I am so glad to have this soothing voice when I get off work.

[@rodneydaub3812]

2:37 Wow the kid looks really happy here

[@karenking5357]

Very sad, huh?! I noticed that too😭

[@helpyourcattodrive]

I just came here from another channel. I’ll drop any great KZbin video for a Grande video … it’s Grande time. Let’s do this.

[@SisterFromAnotherPlanet]

Who else would watch "Cooking With Dr. Grande"

[@2degucitas]

What a selfish, vile woman. At least CPS and courts took custody away from her on several occasions.

[@Nola504Nola]

Dr. Grande's ending analysis sounds like an exact description of my Mom's behaviors. And no one dares confront her or says anything to her about it.

[@SeaBlue1976]

Many times no matter time of the day he uploads just wanna get cozy and hear terrific cases,so i suppose i am a weirdo my self💙

[@Swansong321]

She became a nurse?!

[@SinginginD]

We’re doing an analysis of the Will Smith Chris Rock situation right??? I’m so interested in your take. Were they likely showing signs of an old feud that we never saw? Showing true colors? Was it ego? Show boating? Was Will Smith truly fine until Jada looked at him? Did he feel panicked into doing something? So many layers.

[@staciw454]

Chris Rock has a history of going after Jada, to the point where she requested at one time that he not host events. So Will has probably had an issue with him for a while.

[@audreycasassa1683]

Analysis: self entitled fraud!!!

[@megalopolis2015]

That's sad that the four brothers probably won't know each other. If I were Kimberly's former employer, I would absolutely thoroughly check out each and every one of her patients that were worse off than when they went in for treatment. What a dangerous human being.

[@coreykuefler-terweeme7268]

This is why if I find out someone has BPD I’m running the other way! And I have an abusive ex who had it who traumatized me and now I have PTSD. Yea wow this disorder is F ed up. Honestly he ruined everything for me and ruined my trust.

[@alexkester]

I suffer from BPD. We are not all the same. Plus, this woman suffered from multiple things and not just BPD.

[@coreykuefler-terweeme7268]

@@shea2111 yea exactly I’m not saying all of them are but there’s a higher risk of abuse with borderline personality disorder or other cluster B disorders.

[@l.k.420]

Hello Dr Grande, would you please make a video on Will Smith and the psychological background that lead to him snapping and slapping Chris Rock at the Oscars?

[@anniekierstead5419]

I've heard of so many horrific cases like this. It's heartbreaking to think of the children made victims and not believed when they try to get help. People like this are like time-bombs throughout society; not easy to detect at times, until something tragic like this happens.

[@truecrimechick]

Happy Sunday Dr. G! 🤍🇨🇦🌵

[@jojothemnky]

I'm living with BPD aaaaand this is why ill stay single forever. I'm not going to hurt my family because of my emotional regulation inabilities. Kudos to those who can maintain deep connections. I value my self-reliance and fierce independence, however. also folks with BPD seem to have high intelligence??? maybe not though?

[@emmagatewood3898]

My bpd ex probably has near genius level intellect. Salutatorian of his high school class, full ride scholarship to an elite college, makes 6 figures at a white collar job. Intellectually he is a rock star. Emotionally he is NOT. I sincerely feared for my life towards the end of our marriage. He honestly does have a good heart and generally means well but is overall just not a safe person for me to be around... I'm glad you know yourself well enough to stay away from romantic relationships. I'm doing the same. Cptsd + low self-esteem + severe ADHD = staying single so I don't end up on a Dr. Grande video lol

[@jojothemnky]

@@emmagatewood3898 Ru Paul Is one of my idols, and she says “if you can’t live yourself, how in the hell are you going to love somebody else?” I’ve just got to keep working on myself, and maybe down the line a romantic relationship could be attainable. I’ve come a long way, but I still have a long road ahead.

[@carolbenson6524]

DR. GRANDE...Did you see what happened at the Oscar's....we need your analysis!!!

[@stacyjaye6350]

My mom had a million great sayings. One of which, never make yourself worth more dead than alive. Two of which, if you give me "either, or", I'll take the "or" every last time. No one gives me ultimatums in my personal life. Thanks, Mom.

[@samanthataylor3372]

Your sense of humor is great! As always, this was very interesting. Thank you.

[@maureeningleston1501]

Are you doing 2 videos a day now Dr Grande? your work so hard..do you ever sleep??????? Thank you for all your hard work and great content.

[@Flower4229]

Can’t wait to see your take on Will Smith Chris Rock slap

[@bhanson4917]

As the son of a mother with BPD, this sounds all too familiar. "I'm not crazy- the entire world is crazy and I'm the only one who sees it!!!!" -My Mom

[@brianpratt3224]

You should do a video speculating on the people that watch your videos.

[@karenking5357]

OH NO PLEASE .. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@DaisyLee1963]

Who picks So I Married an Axe Murderer as a movie on your first date???? Weird right off the bat. I feel so sad for Cherry!! And can you subpoena a person with an IQ of 54? It would be like treating a nine year old as an adult. I'm not aware of how the law works in Texas or anywhere else, but it seems to me that a person with the functional skills of a 9 year old needs a whole lot of protection; more than Cherry received. She had no business being anywhere near Kimberly. It would seem no one around Cherry knew just how dangerous Kimberly was.

[@davidwhitney1171]

I picked "Jaws" as a first date move back in high school in 1975. However I had no intention of ever feeding my date, who would become a long term relationship, to a shark or other dangerous sea creature....

[@jenovella70]

So I Married an Axe Murderer is a Mike Myers COMEDY. He was very popular at the time and a comedy film is a fine choice for a first date. I’m not excusing or explaining any of the other aspects or actions in this case, I just wanted to clear that part up.

[@maxalberts2003]

What great presentations EVERY TIME. Thank you very much. You're a fantastic story-teller.

[@jensmith9812]

Since this video is going to feed into the negative stereotypes can you make a video educating people that most Borderline people don't act this way?

[@geewilakers5229]

He has in the past.

[@naamashang5107]

Thank you for saying this, as a person with BPD I know that I would never act in that way. It is true that I have Quiet borderline personality disorder, so I never have fits of rage, but even so, it sounds to me as if she had many other problems and that BPD was not necessarily the driving force. These stigmas are so dangerous because they do nothing to explain the situation and the suffering the person with the disorder is in. It is clear that she was guilty, and even though I am completely against the death penalty, and thus sorry she was convicted in this case,I don’t doubt her guilt even for a second. I think her driving forces had to do with other parts of her personality though.

[@MegaSilverbirch]

It’s like any of these disorders… there are different degrees of severity.

[@freedomfries6618]

They may not all be killers, but they are extremely difficult people to deal with.

[@naamashang5107]

@@freedomfries6618 that’s a very big assumption, I don’t believe it to be true. It is a disability just like any other.

[@elainespall5677]

Dr Grande - please do an analysis on the Will Smith/Chris Rock incident. PLEASE!!!