Living in a Dream | Laura Weinstein | TEDxYouth@NBPS

Depersonalization, a dissociative symptom often looked over by the mental health community and profession, will be experienced by 50% of the population once in their lifetime, while only 2% of the population will suffer from depersonalization disorder chronically. Laura brings light to this mental disorder by sharing her 11 year battle with depersonalization disorder. Laura Weinstein is a student journalist, as well as a vegan, LGBTQ+, and feminist activist from Coral Springs, Florida. She is the opinion editor of North Broward’s online newspaper Brainwash, where she publishes everything from movie reviews to controversial articles on questioning the foundation of personal ethics. Laura is an officer for the Gay Straight Alliance of NBPS, and runs social media for the club as well. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

[@jfevans11]

When i first got this i almost went insane i thought that my life was all a lie and i thought that i was just in a dream and that maybe if i died i would wake up.

[@tochodita6335]

same

[@Vicdog408]

Ratzy G try not to think this brother! You’re not alone

[@IFFYx3]

I feel like I'm losing my damn mind!

[@ricoco7891]

Haha I sometimes get these thoughts as well. Everything is so bizarre, that I sometimes feel like life really IS some sort of hallucination/dream and that death would finally wake me up.

[@IFFYx3]

Yes or like you're dead already. Ever feel ljke life is pointless??

[@marychaplin2279]

I’ve had this for 4 years now and it won’t go away no matter what I do. People don’t understand how truly terrifying this is.

[@madsgaltung9512]

Mary Chaplin Try thinking hard that you Are not captured by a calendar, no schedule, no plans whatsoever. Just feel the noises and movements of today, now. Close your eyes sometimes and go a couple meters. You will feel more alive, I can tell you that!

[@shrrade]

My advice: stop researching it, stop thinking about it as much as you can (hard I know) and stop talking about it unless you really need to. That’s how I got over it

[@funwithaiman]

I feel you. It feels as if you’re shielded by a void, and you feel dreamlike. Everything seems scripted and that you’re unable to feel yourself and your mind is constantly cloudy, and memory recall is a nightmare itself. Don’t worry.

[@hairystyles4212]

@@shrrade Same here. It took a couple years, but I am so much better now. Hardly happens unless I smoke weed or am sleep deprived.

[@shrrade]

hairystyles42 I had it for a few months, doesn’t really happen anymore unless I’m in really deep thought and snap out of it, sudden change of environment (for example stepping outside) sleep deprived as you said or flooding with endorphins, it only lasts a few seconds though. I think that it was already there when I did those things but I had nothing to relate it to, maybe that derealization was always there in a way.

[@hunter.strawberry]

struggle with DPDR every day, but making gradual progress. Watching others talk openly about this helps ground me. Thank you

[@leonaswift3834]

Hope you’re ok🖤

[@ohlouda954]

Hunter Brownfield hey i’m the girl in the video! if you ever need to talk dm me on instagram @lauraaaaashley

[@hunter.strawberry]

awesome, requested :)@@ohlouda954

[@gustaf5466]

oh louda Can I speak to you too?

[@ohlouda954]

@@hunter.strawberry i'm so sorry, i probably rejected your follow request. make sure to request again!

[@alexisyoung9729]

I remember how relived I was after I finally told a friend about how I felt and he reassured me I was real and it calmed me down a bit. Mirrors scare me . I feel like I’m watching myself in the third person , floating above myself . I’m scared I’m living in a coma or a dream and I can’t wake up. It feels like I could die any minute and there’s nothing anybody can do to help . like there is a barrier between me and everything else in the world . Like it’s all a program and everyone is a robot. I can’t wait till it stops . Having friends know and tell you you are real everyday helps

[@jacksmith2715]

You are not alone

[@nikkunshu]

We're all going through it together. Don't worry. As she said, as bad as it seems, but it has also made us who we are. And we do love us. Right? We want to live. We are the hopefuls. Let the hope stay within if not anything else.

[@lukav3255]

@@driftaddictbr Go to a trauma specialised therapist if you can, also have you been better? I know my dpdr has gotten way better although the progress isn't exactly linear it's still progress, it was caused by a bad marijuana experience.

[@iloveaaronwarnerr]

you’re definitely not alone. It’s terrifying. I feel like i’ve lost myself and i feel like i don’t even have thoughts anymore. I don’t feel real at all, I just feel like my life is happening without me. Whenever i’m with other people i look at them and wish i was like them and felt real.

[@rng_nr22angel33]

i feel exactly the same

[@aleetee2003]

My last depersonalization episode was five years ago. At that time, I would lock myself in my bathroom and spend the entire day there (literally). I wasn't able to go outside because It would cause me to question my existence. I almost felt like I died and I was living in my afterlife. 5 years later (today). I'm fully healed. It took a long time to realize it was all in my head. I don't know what else (if anything) contributed to my healing, but I'm happy again.

[@waangun]

Can you tell me how you got through it ?

[@ABeautifulEarthForOurChildren]

​@@waangun it is probably because you don't feel safe in your own body. So your attention detaches from your body and you feel like you're just watching yourselr

[@mahmoudelsaraf1094]

How recover from dp please

[@johnd.2803]

how did you recover if I may ask?

[@waangun]

@@johnd.2803 Tbh it doesn't go completely away , you have to take it as something that you shouldn't be afraid of , tell yourself every time that it is going to go away and its not something I should afraid of and also you need to calm yourself that you aren't going to get crazy

[@crxjxe3075]

Looking at the mirror. Looking at my body. My body. My body? Why do feel like it's not mine? Whose mass of things are these? move these hands Fidget toes down there feel pain where pinch It's attached to me somehow Is this my face?

[@megibatsa925]

Jose cruz How are you?

[@imnoandroid4501]

If it is not mine, then whose body is it? This damn question.

[@dakshs9528]

I've been suffering dpdr since 3.5 years. I've been numb all these years. Sometimes when my anxiety kicks in , dpdr makes me numb and i can talk to people. But i feel completely numb. Feels like i am talking to people automatically. Really weird but I'm used to it. Lol now I've started to think that's how my life's gonna be. Btw , it's intense. I've never ever felt real in years. Mental numbness all the time.

[@Rejjhani]

Stop please

[@flakzplancarte2351]

Jose cruz is this depersonalization? This is exactly how I would describe my experiences and I could never describe till now 😫thank you

[@JChill-ot9lc]

Just so y’all know, you CAN beat this!!!! :)))) I went through this after quitting drugs and it gave me severe depression but I BEAT IT. I WON. I FEEL NORMAL AGAIN. This went on for 3 years. But it WILL STOP EVENTUALLY just stop thinking about it try to ignore it and breathe and be patient it eventually stops. I promise :) I’m so happy again!!!

[@Bjooooom]

I've got it for 1 month now after having a bad trip from smoking too much weed for the first time. I hope it does go away because I can't enjoy life the same way I did before.

[@sonrichard4940]

Bomi yo add my snap Richarddehari I got dpdr to

[@UFO_808]

What drugs you used?

[@tannerbrandon5211]

Anyway to contact you

[@sanboi1905]

i love this comment so much. gives hope

[@luce69]

i'm crying. For years I thought I was crazy but when I learned about depersonalisation, I felt understood

[@kyzourz346]

i relate

[@allidixon8076]

me too bru thi shi is crazy

[@skull7598]

@@allidixon8076 on god

[@ryanlewis8734]

Please talk to god he can help you and heal you and will take this away from you

[@StacyFrancis94]

It is a mental disorder so you are still crazy but you can get help.

[@MrInfoRevolution]

As somebody who went through this for almost two years, and still has episodes. It can be something you can tame, it's the fear that feeds depersonalisation, once you're able to tame that fear and face it in the face, while not being scared, but viewing it as a temporary feeling, you can conquer it. I know it sounds cliche, because I heard 'recovery' stories when I was going through the horrors of the feeling, but trust me. It's nothing to be afraid of in the end.

[@lukav3255]

thx

[@christiansilva1110]

I'm 10 years old, it's chronic

[@tr14sn]

thankyou for sharing this🥺

[@ekitorfreire]

This is so interesting. How do you tame it? Do you tell yourself something to help you resist it? Did you start to realize something other than terror in detaching yourself from personhood? Sorry I'm curious

[@TheyHateFendii]

@@ekitorfreire talk to your mom about it or parents when it’s bad that calms u down and try and go outside more if you play basketball play basketball the more you go on with ur regular life the better it gets and try and remember how it feels when it’s starting to kick in it’s makes it wayy easier for you to control which leads to you forgetting about it since you know it’s controllable and that eventually leads to it going away lol

[@XOAmani32]

I just found out yesterday I have been dealing with this for 16 years, and I'm only 24! One day in the 3rd grade I woke up and I felt tired (not sleepy, but tired) and generally disinterested in life. I tried to explain it to my mom but she never understood. I was so happy to find out that it had a name and there were other people that felt like me!

[@MissesGJ]

Omg exactly the same for me! I also woke up one day (8 years ago, I'm 19 now) and since that day it has never been gone... It's a pure nightmare

[@shmates]

reading things like this reallay is comforting I'm 19 and just found out this feelings is called DRDP and I've had it since 2nd grade when I went to a natural history museum. My therapist said I must be getting PTSD from when it started

[@themellowbutterfly_2446]

Omg sameee, life and memories are a haze, I can't remember most of my childhood I'm 17 now and I only recently found the term depersonolisation/derealisation and it was a huge relief to know I'm not alone.... Panic attacks are frequent for me, but I can't imagine life without it. My dream-like reality is my brains way of keeping me from experiencing deeper trauma, detatching from reality makes it hard to formulate memory. This is a downside of course bc fomo right, I can't experience the fullness of reality of life like those without DR/DP but at the same time no-one else can experience and fully understand my life if they don't have DRDP. I've decided to coexist with it, allow it to shape me into the person people ,separate from my trauma, know and love

[@enearu599]

When I am in public place I feel disconnected from the surrounding. It doesn't happen everytime I am around people or in public. I went for shopping yesterday and I felt like I couldn't function properly, I couldn't cross the road properly. I was also unable to understand what the shopkeeper was saying and wasn't able to focus on what I was asking. I have experienced like this a lot of times but was never bothered to search why I feel like this. Can this be derealization?

[@shikharsrivastava1533]

@@enearu599 the symptoms that you are stating are clear indications of derealization disorder . i'm going thru it as of now since 14 days :) hope you're well and fine and also hoping that this feeling shall pass someday !

[@icecoldpolaroid]

That got so deep I have a breakdown in the middle of the video. I just want my body back, I just want to be normal. I want it to stop. And how do I know I am commenting on the right video? How do I know I just watched the video I just saw? I hate my head! I want it to stop! Why won't it stop?!

[@graciedemarco2277]

WGW i felt you on this. 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

[@presleycole5572]

It’ll be okay - I go through the same thing and it’s very scary ♥️

[@ycnan3911]

how you doing now?

[@hairystyles4212]

it took a couple years for me, but I am so much better now. It hardly ever happens unless I'm extremely stressed out. It was pretty severe for almost a year for me. I truly wish you start to come out of that hole soon.

[@nikkunshu]

I'd suggest you watch the last couple of minutes again. that'll breed some hope in you. Hang in there.❤️

[@stylianospapadopoulos6139]

She is only 16! Omg, what a profound and comforting speech. Thank you from a fellow sufferrer.

[@nickreyes3088]

Living in a purgatory between life and death. That is exactly how this feels

[@elisem1912]

yes

[@jjk5693]

It feels like Im living in a dream or a simulation constantly for me

[@lex.cordis]

I went through it for over two years chronically, but have been "cured" for a few years now. It was triggered largely by my own personally understanding of the implications of quantum mechanics and constant obsessive existential ruminations. It was horrifying Wishing you peace and blessings. You can get through it.

[@ABeautifulEarthForOurChildren]

I don't want to scare you but that's what you are: awareness. If you stop fighting it and stop fighting your own body, thoughts and mind it will get better. Do everything you can to feel safe in your own body again

[@nickreyes3088]

@@ABeautifulEarthForOurChildren appreciate that. Ive come to realize that as of late

[@lindsayreese2976]

You are not alone. There is always hope. The key is acceptance.

[@STXRBOY999]

Lindsay Reese 😌

[@hair4022]

It's not that easy it's so hard to say "hey this is real!" But you quickly go back to the disorder and you give up

[@hair4022]

@@andrewjamesm do you think it's that easy? "Oh I got depression but let's just throw that out the window" no its not like that your not in charge of the disorder

[@ashtondavis479]

@@hair4022 how are you today?? Are you okay?

[@hair4022]

@@ashtondavis479 hey what’s up. I still have the disorder and it still takes a toll on my life. I’m searching for treatment. Also FYI the cure isn’t “acceptance” it’s mental help

[@alyssa4976]

this brought me to tears i hate this feeling

[@tylerreynolds9991]

stay strong. things get brighter

[@mfalcotore2815]

Yeah I know the feeling..

[@M-_-M-_-Mtv]

I relate as well

[@keeleymarie6172]

You ok x

[@dakshs9528]

Hah , i can't even cry. I've been suffering both dp and dr since years and i feel like this is the new normal but still , there're 2 things i can still feel, Anxiety and depression.

[@jine7123]

Let's look to our past, and re-connect with ourselves... Grieve and change our current situation... Growth from this Dp/Dr is 100%!

[@alkevinzmedia]

I have struggled with this since 2004. It's been terrible having this for so long that it's eaten a large chunk of my happiness. And I have found a solution so far that's works for me. 1.) I go outside breathe and look at moving objects around me (cars, traffic and people ) . 2.) I look at both of my hands and move them around in fluid circular motion. 3.) I force my eyes to track and focus on my hands while they move for a couple of seconds. 4.) Then I stop , look down on the ground and then look straight ahead slowly looking up. I remind myself to keep looking at traffic, people, cars , and moving objects in a fluid motion. I pay attention to the last frame of what I saw. So in a way I remove the movie feel or 24frames per second feeling. This is happening in the Optic Nerves along with your sinuses senses. So you need to force your eyes to focus strong and you might get a slight headache after but keep doing it until you train yourself to see the world in fluid motion and come back to your normal self! Also if you want to train your ears at the same time, buy an Audio recorder with live audio feed and listen to your environment clearer with earbuds while doing this exercise. Cheers everyone! ☺️

[@Vicdog408]

Allan Zepeda gonna try and remember to do this.. thanks brother!

[@tr14sn]

THANKSSS ALLAN

[@lynda_lou]

What a beautiful person you are, and so very brave standing up there on stage doing this talk, what a contributing speech you have done for this world :)

[@deniseklainguti8998]

As someone diagnosed with CPTSD I've been suffering from this extremely annoying feeling for almost 1.5 years. Constantly. It's soothing to hear I'm not alone with it, and that for the case it won't go away, it's possible to be happy again. :)

[@facelessfacer5482]

I had an episode that lasted only about 10 minutes, my reflection in my t.v. calmed me, only because it assured me that I was still real and very much alive with complete control over my body. My dog also helped keep me calm through it.

[@sarac.3568]

I'm happy that brought you back. I looked at myself in the mirror and didn't know who that was. It was the most devastating experience I've ever had.

[@charliegall9985]

@sarac.3568 if I'm getting it bad I almost can't look in mirrors because I feel like I don't know who is looking back at me

[@MrCmon113]

Control is a shallow illusion that can easily be broken. You just have to pay attention for a split second when a decision is made.

[@Gavroche_]

I have to say that I disagree with most people who say that the best thing to do is to try not to think about it and wait for it to go away on its own. I did that because that was what everyone was saying and I was struggling for months. Then I finally decided to see a psychiatrist about it and start a therapy. It was the best decision of my life and I recommend anyone who is currently going through this awful experience to do the same. This is treatable and there are medicines that will most likely help you. After a couple of weeks of treatment I started feeling a bit better. It hasn't gone away completely just yet, but I think Im on the right track. Stay strong everyone and don't be afraid to ask for help!

[@jkerman5113]

Could you tell me more about what kind of therapy and medicines you used? Also, how is your dissociation now?

[@Gavroche_]

​@@jkerman5113 Sure! In my case it was SSRI and pregabalin + psychotherapy, but I recommend seeing a doctor because every case is different. I've also moved back to my home country and completely changed my surroundings and people around me. I gave up smoking and drinking. I've been feeling better for a while now, I do not experience dissociation anymore. My mental condition is still not as good as it used to be, but compared to the worst period I've had it's night and day. Curing this thing is a process, but I really believe it's possible to speed things up. :)

[@mariellabush9459]

I’ve had this for over seven years but people who have recovered say it doesn’t go until you accept it and stop being scared of it. Feelings of hopelessness is a symptom of derealisation so that makes sense. Good luck everyone who has it and don’t fear it it’s just your mind’s way of protecting you from anxiety❤️

[@bigt9726]

if you are going thru this right now, just know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I had this my whole life and since i hit 24 (one year ago) i have been out of it. just know it will get better i promise

[@channelname1982]

i hope ur right

[@jjk5693]

@@channelname1982 Im 16 and it feels like Im constantly dreaming and that everyone and everything acts artificial and weird somehow. Also words and sounds are meaningless. They feel fake. It feels like Im not really there....

[@jjk5693]

@@channelname1982 I also feel like Im on autopilot and that sometimes I question what I say and it feels like I dont have full control on what Im saying. Even my own thoughts and words feel fake. The whole concept feels fake. The word "word" doesn't make sense

[@sandralgiles7598]

@@jjk5693oh my gosh, I thought it was just me..I get the same feelings..as I’m talking I feel like it’s not me and I stop talking. Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone

[@3tch3r]

I've had it for 24 years 24/7. Don't give people false hope. Some people will have it for life.

[@cjames7958]

All DPDR is, is a sensation created by anxiety. It's not harmful, it's acting as a way to protect you by dissociating yourself from a highly stressful situation. Unfortunately, anxiety makes your mind believe you're always in a highly stressful situation, so this sensation is there alot of the time for many anxiety sufferers. However, rest assured, once you reduce and remove the anxiety completely, the sensation fades away completely and forever.

[@justinjoe2749]

This is all anybody needs to hear. I've had this twice severely, ur 1000% correct. The reason I say this is all anybody needs ti hear is because if you get too fixated on it, it gets so much worse. Also sunglasses help for some reason lol

[@ElmoSS_]

I have it for 5 years now. I am used of it now.

[@sindhu905]

2 months back I listened an audio on KZbin after that i am getting depersonalization attacks.when I researched about the channel i got to know that she is 21year old psychologist and she uses hypnosis in her videos to get desired results like model face, blue eyes,etc Please help me what i should do

[@TheTrveMothlord]

@@justinjoe2749 I find that sunglasses reduce sensory input and feel like a comfort shield from "seeing" how dissociated I feel from my environment

[@justinjoe2749]

@@TheTrveMothlord ya I got a lil too used to it at one point lol. Was afraid to take ‘em off even indoors and even slept with em😂

[@zitaani2581]

WARNING! DPDR trigger. The video itself is a trigger!

[@sidefx9092]

Zita Ani yes it is

[@will724.]

facts

[@hair4022]

No its not only abuse,tragic death etc but not videos

[@lukedhoffman12]

@@hair4022 nah fam, just thinking about dpdr for me can cause episodes.

[@pixelated3269]

uno whats crazy, is that this comment is true, for some reason watching these DPDR videos make me feel all those terrible symptoms in it. . you'd think having a general conversation about DRPR would be fine but god that feeling, that dreadful- is this real- feeling that i get..

[@kurtolson6065]

I had the same experience acutely after smoking marijuana. The after effects lasted for years and years. It seemed to create panic as a symptom, of the DP. At the time nobody believed that the MJ caused it. I have never had that experience in life except on MJ. Doctors thought it may have been laced, but it was tested and it wasn't. DP is such a horrible thing. It's NOT a Joe Rogan "finding truth or expanding perception" prospect. It is also NOT something that soft or weak people only experience. People who "smoke" regularly laugh often say, "you had a bad trip, we ALL have". This is more than a bad trip, and is real and something is amiss in the brain chemistry of those who suffer. Thanks for your presentation Laura, I wish I had heard this is 1987. Peace and love.

[@peytonmckinney5277]

Hey Kurt. Have you recovered fully now? Ive been dealing with this for 3 years now. Some days are better than others but I still feel like a complete different person than I did before. My biggest concern is my memory and future mental health. My memory is also what triggers me now and causes me to panic. For example if I am questioned about something that happened in the past and I don’t remember it, Ill start freaking out that Im losing my mind. I just need some reassurance of hope. If you could get back to me that would be great. Thank you!

[@RoyGBiv-lc8tv]

I’ve even experienced it with alcohol. Anything that causes mind altering effects, causes my DPDR to kick in.

[@erindowling8540]

@@peytonmckinney5277 Many people get over it with deep meditation. Also something called NPL hypnosis meditation.

[@peytonmckinney5277]

@@erindowling8540 Thank you!

[@whoselijah1]

@@peytonmckinney5277 wow dude. I got the goosebumps reading your comment. I feel the exact same way. My memory is shot and it terrifies me. I still smoke daily, all day. Today I made the decision to hopefully change for the good. Good luck dude. ❤️

[@alexisretzepis8502]

SO happy this is getting noticed. DPDR is real!

[@whoknows1528]

Definitely it is real.

[@excuseme1911]

Ironic comment

[@rebekahb5275]

Very frustrating when doctors and psychiatrist don’t know what dpdr is.

[@skull7598]

@@excuseme1911 lmao

[@sopfer13]

i feel that i am real but everything else feels really foggy if that makes any sense and at this point i can't tell the difference between my dreams and my real life but it's chill

[@humbledtruth9022]

sophie ferguson that happened to me too it felt like I was on drugs all the time but it was scary for me and I felt like I was dying and no one understood what I was trying to explain and so I’ve given up on explaining it to people because no one truly will understand unless they have it

[@paytonjeffery6772]

I feel like this too bruh. Every time I wake up after dreaming I really have to think about what was exclusive to the dream and what is still real.

[@bubbaenthusiast6246]

Its a real pain in the ass,i cant even do simple things at this point

[@derekfromschool2165]

Ive been dealing with this for a year but you kind of get used to it

[@user-qf3fk6df1r]

sophie ferguson sophie ferguson it’s called derealization, sometimes mix and matched with depersonalization but it’s definitely different when you break it down and look at it

[@wrightcarl1181]

11 years for me.. This is my life now, no-one truly understands unless they have it. You just have to accept it and not fight it

[@Knowhowskanda]

😢

[@erufenn9933]

I’ve come to the same conclusion myself, after years of seclusion trying to fight it silently in my head I’ve learned that I just need to accept it

[@epicdata_3D]

My life ruined because of this weired symptom, im suppering from last 15yrs and i want to die, but im still alive for my mom and dad

[@Brokenlance]

Saying that DPDR can be it's own disorder can be quite a dangerous thing to say, since many who have dealt with it for years and have recovered can tell you it is literally just a symptom of an over active stress and anxiety response. There is hope and recovery for all who suffer from DPDR, such as myself, but you have to address the real problem: anxiety and anxious thought habits. Edit: In the years since developing and recovering from DPDR, I came back to correct something. I when I say DPDR is not a disorder, what I meant was that the sensations of depersonalization and derealization are a symptom of an overstimulated stress response, and so to end the sensations of DPDR, you need to address cause of anxiety and stress, not the sensations themselves. I understand that there is such a thing as DPDR disorder in the DSM-V, but that doesn’t mean those sensations are triggered independently from a stress response. The point of this comment was that when I first watched this, I almost was convinced it never gets better. Fast forward to 2022, and I haven’t felt prolonged DPDR in almost 2 years. I only feel it as a symptom of a panic attack, and now that I know how to handle it, the feeling dissipates after a short time. All this is to say that if you have a greater underlying issue such as C-PTSD that is causing the DPDR, of course it isn’t going to just go away, but the symptoms can be lessened as you recover from your overstimulated stress response firing at all times. I hope everyone here finds healing and some sort of recovery or relief.

[@ohlouda954]

DPDR is a disorder that is recognized in the DSM-5

[@ohlouda954]

also I noted that only 2% of those who experience DP/DR actually have it as its own separate disorder, not ignoring the fact that the onset of this can be by many different traumatic experiences such as childhood abuse, drug use, and PTSD.

[@Brokenlance]

@@ohlouda954 I am aware of the DSM V placing it under the category of disorder for those who have it on a chronic level. I may have incorrectly worded my point. Typically when something is a disorder, to treat it means that the main problem is DPDR. But to treat it you do not try to fix the DPDR, but rather you address the anxiety that perpetuates it. Now if that is the main symptom of a deeper issue, then the treatment can be far more involved since the issue is more than just DPDR like a far more serious dissociative disorder. I guess by accepting it as just a disorder of it's own with anxiety only being a symptom creates quite an issue for those trying to recover. Now everyone is different so your journey is definitely different from mine but my approach to recovery was to address it as a symptom of the main issue being anxiety and I went from chronic DPDR to only having mild sensations and residual anxieties that have improved as time went on.

[@Brokenlance]

@markmatthews As vague as this sounds, it doesn't feel like anything remarkable. It feels like normal. You just understand you are real and tangible. You stop self monitoring and ruminating. You're so distracted by normal life that you forget to worry if that means anything. DP/DR is just an over active stress response that, once dealt with correctly, will eventually reverse itself. Did you get yours from a panic attack?

[@juli77778]

@@Brokenlance Hi there, I've been in a derealized state for the past two months after a really bad panic attack. Naturally its slowly gotten better and I thought it was just going to magically go away but my progress has plateaued. Im working on calming my anxiety and thinking positivley but its hard when I dont really feel anything but nothingness. Do you have any information on the best route to take to make it go away? Or any tips at all thank you its appreciated

[@deanrandall3]

My first episode was in the summer of 2015, and I was at the movie theater with my camp group. I was sitting normally when all of the sudden I began to have these existential thoughts flood my mind. I felt my heart beating out of my chest and everything around me began to spin. After a few minutes, I was able to calm myself down and continue life as usual. Over the next few weeks, I had occasional episodes but it was manageable. In the following years, I never stopped thinking about why I was having these feelings. Although I didn’t have any episodes for a while after that summer, I would still have these intrusive thoughts from time to time. Nearly 8 years later, I have become consumed by this feeling and nothing has helped me make it go away. Over the past few months, I have had looming feelings of anxiety and dpdr, but I told myself that it was nothing and that it would go away on its own. However, the past few weeks have been unbearable and these feelings have completely engulfed my mind. Every day I feel like I’m living in some kind of dream, and it’s nearly impossible to distinguish between reality and fantasy. What was occasional episodes has become a constant feeling that I can’t escape. Every day is becoming harder and I keep convincing myself that I’m going crazy and that I’ll never be the same. This crippling illness has taken every last bit of happiness that once existed within me. I don’t know how much longer I can contain myself before these thoughts get the best of me. Over the past few weeks, I have done so much research and I’ve learned so much about this disorder. I’ve also learned that so many other people are experiencing the same thing. For so long, I believed that I was the only one experiencing this and that I was completely alone in this struggle. For anyone who is going through this, just know that you are not alone and that these feelings will pass even if it feels hopeless.

[@denisejasmine9178]

I’ve been experiencing this daily for about 4 1/2years. It changed my life. Since I was 14 I had panic attacks that I knew were different than how other people described their panic attacks. I know now that they were intense episodes of derealization and panic. I experience more derealization than depersonalization (or at least that’s the one I dwell on the most). 4 1/2years ago I had a one of these episodes only it didn’t really go away. The next morning everything was still so weird and looked like an illusion. My adrenaline was still super high. It was hellish. My life never went back to a place or normalcy. Since then I don’t really leave my house at night. I struggle to go anywhere and can’t work full time. I’ve had to give up so many things. It’s so difficult to find a therapist, psychiatrist, etc who is knowledgeable about it (they know of it but they aren’t specialized in it). It has crippled my life. And it’s even harder when the people around you don’t understand. I’m sorry this comment just turned into venting. It truly has been such a struggle and every day feels like something I have to endure.

[@tncrizzy4048]

I’ve been like this for. About 5 months now , working full time . But I also don’t go out or night or even during the day , I just live with it and accept that one day I will be normal again

[@sindhu905]

2 months back I listened an audio on KZbin after that i am getting depersonalization attacks.when I researched about the channel i got to know that she is 21year old psychologist and she uses hypnosis in her videos. Please help me what i should do

[@laylalove8641]

thank you, from the bottom of my heart. you are not alone

[@rhysmentalhealth2521]

I’ve had dpdr 24/7 for 3 years now. I’m 22 now and I was 19 when it began. I experienced it periodically when I was younger although I didn’t know what it was at the time. Ironically this disorder has made my anxiety, panic attacks and depression so much worse. I still feel all the horrible emotions but am numb to EVERY positive emotion. I honestly don’t see how I could possibly get out of this other than in a coffin. I’m going to keep pushing regardless. It’s safe to say I’m losing hope.

[@DanielMarius.]

I'm also 22, been dealing with this for 3 years now, since having some concentrated weed oil stuff. It feels really hopeless and idk how I've managed so far. The doctor just tells me it's caused by anxiety but it feels like it's the depersonalization that's causing the anxiety. I've somehow learned to cope but I've had my moments where I freaked out. I must say though, over the years it's become easier to kind of ignore and I believe that one day I will feel normal again.

[@ElmoSS_]

I also have it. I have it now for 5 years. Now I am used to it. I don't remember how it was before.

[@rhysmentalhealth2521]

@@DanielMarius. I was a mess the first year or so but you’re right it does get easier to cope with and ignore. Nowadays I’m a more controlled mess aha. I hope one day both of our brains allow us to feel again :)

[@rhysmentalhealth2521]

@@ElmoSS_ I can still vaguely remember how I used to feel. When I try to remember what life used to be it’s like when you forget something and it’s on the tip of your tongue. That’s how I’d describe how my brain feels about life before dpdr.

[@gadikalman5059]

Please don’t give up hope. There are so many people like you and you are not alone. Please don’t be afraid to get help from the suicide hotline. You are needed!

[@jeffrey322]

At one time I could not even think about my disorder because that alone would induce an episode. I was a prisoner of the disorder. At the age of nine, I was diagnosed with Anxiety after I was unable to stay on the baseball field without having an episode. I'm now sixty-one years of age and still have a mild form of Derealization. Friends simply cannot relate and try to fit it into their non-DR, rational reasoning, telling me things such as, "You're not really lost for long. Just keep driving and you'll realize where you are" or "Your phobia makes no sense at all" or "There are drugs for that." I relate to your descriptions throughout this video. Imagine having this before the internet or before any books recognized this--so thank you for this talk.

[@allidixon8076]

wow

[@venusinfurs]

it’s such a strange feeling, it gets better though I started experiencing it end of August 2021 and was horrified of life and the thought of being alive, slowly but surely the fear goes away

[@AndyRStPaul]

Has anyone ever just felt really exhausted like even when you open yours? You slept all night but when you wake up you’re still tired!?

[@overlyover5253]

Yes, like I slept majority of the day and have only been up for a few hours and feel tired.

[@adriel2596]

Yup, or that feeling when you sleep really late and although I don’t I still wake up feeling weird and tired

[@xgmzq8349]

Ive been in and out of dpdr for a while now , the thing that helped me the most was being present majority of the time . The second thing is allowing it to be there , its a defense mechanism which is a blessing and a curse at the same time , when ever you focus on it you give it more attention thus making it grow more just accept it and let it be there and trust me it goes away . If you make it your life then it will be your life , this simple shift in ur head will help you tremendously you’ll find yourself forgetting about it when you’re present and doing things you like whether or not you’re experiencing it and with time you’ll unteach yourself the habit of focusing on it and slowly pulling the roots out from your brain as it is there when you notice it only , INSHALLAH you all get through this .

[@Levnerad]

Omg this is such an accurate depiction of the condition. I used to think I was just more philosophically inclined than other people but ever since smoking weed heightened existential thinking such thoughts became more intrusive and detrimental towards my well being. Feels good to know someone else feels so similarly

[@nathanferguson906]

I completely understand you mate. I spent a summer smoking weed, camping and deep in thought. At first I thought it could only be a good thing - you develop an appreciation for nature and you begin to think of life on a level that you would never be able to achieve in a sober state. But it can turn on you and it did for me. People aren't mean't to expose themselves to that level of existential thinking too often otherwise you will lose hope and feel like there is no meaning when in reality there is. I'm trying to regain my control on reality through various means and one of those means is by distracting myself from those existential thoughts by trying to find things that I love doing that will ground me in the MOMENT.

[@Levnerad]

Nathan Ferguson Yeah. I never would have thought I would so badly wan’t to trade in some of my intelligence just to become a simpleton and not have metaphysical thoughts

[@arsenmalaj8757]

@@nathanferguson906 hey guys how has it been for you 1 year later? Did you recover? I'm in the same boat. 2 months now struggling with constant dp and existential thoughts and altered perception. It has gotten so bad that I can't watch the sky at night because I'm afraid and it feels so weird. I would appreciate a conversation and some exchange of ideas though. No one from my family or friends understand me 😔

[@nathanferguson906]

​@@arsenmalaj8757 Hi Arsen, first off, I'm so sorry, I know exactly what you're going through and I also know what it's like for no one to understand. Having no one who understood my condition made the experience far more difficult to get through. But, I have good news for you; I did eventually recover. It was a slow process that took many months so it's important to be patient with yourself, it's not an easy thing to get out of. I personally had to take a lot of time to re-analyze my life and find the source of the anxiety that was triggering my DP; once I found the source, I was able to come to terms with it. I don't know what is triggering your DP, so I can't give specific advice on how you can fix it, but I wanted you to know that it is possible to move past it. DP is nothing more than a protective mechanism, your body is trying to distance itself from the issues within your life, and that can be extremely disorientating and scary, but, if you correct the underlying cause, then your body will have no reason to protect itself. Give yourself time, find a distraction and be kind to yourself when the episodes occur, find the source of your DP and find a way to deal with it or learn to accept it. A year on and I'm still very much the same existential person, who ponders the intricacies of life on a daily basis, but my perspective has shifted in a far more positive direction so that my body no longer feels the need to detach itself from reality in order to feel safe. If you have any more questions then please feel free to ask. All the best mate.

[@angelalomeli8620]

Bruh fr !!

[@mingramh]

Thank you for speaking out and God bless.

[@brandoncoffey2976]

It really hit home for me when she spoke about no Dr, Psychologist and other medical professionals not understanding. I have been to countless Dr's, counselors, psychs and tried a few different medications. Came pretty close to benzo addiction, I was just lucky that I wasn't in too deep. For years I have been avoiding the word depersonalization because I was so fixated on it when it all first started happening and as part of my 'recovery', I had to completely abandon DPDR and use the word 'anxiety'. Its complete bulls**t! I may have anxiety too (I think almost everyone does really in this day and age) but it is so much more deeper than that and no one cares :( I dont blame them though, before I ever had such a condition theres no way I could comprehend what something like this is like and figure someone telling me that they 'dont feel real' are just being weird. I hope everyone else who is suffering from this is able to find strength and fight through it to the best of their ability and live a happy fulfilling life

[@Notjustgoodvibes]

I am in this condition since 2005. I am an observer of my life. All people now talk about corona and how terrible it is. I can't take this anymore. I have no words for this pain...

[@nejjtak7048]

I have had this for 3 mounths i am sick off IT

[@LilyStultz]

@@nejjtak7048 how are you doing now?

[@nejjtak7048]

@@LilyStultz still have it

[@LilyStultz]

@@nejjtak7048 what caused it?

[@nejjtak7048]

@@LilyStultz lsd

[@juliacapuzzi2729]

Just found this word. Been dealing with this my whole life. I’m 20 now and accepted my dreamlike reality. Thought everyone dealt with this until I started describing the feelings I felt.

[@merds475]

I experienced the same for around 9 months when I was 10. I am now fully recovered (this was 7 years ago) so please don't give up hope. I know how the feeling consumes your thoughts but I PROMISE that there is a way out as long as you make sure you have regular contact with other people/ activities to keep you busy.

[@MaestroStefanoPetrini]

have you ever taken benzodiazepines? They can cause long-term depersonalization. And have you ever tried to go to sleep no later than 9:30 pm? Respecting biorhythms the problem goes away

[@Argelius1]

It's always reassuring hearing anyone describe something that is so, so difficult to describe.

[@TheRealKyle]

I suffer with suicidal ideation (active), and have experienced loads of episodes where i loose myself, control on what is happening, and has lead me to attempts ive not wanted to do but saw myself do them. I am finally coming to grasps with my condition and have plenty of safety measures in place as i live by myself and have no one around. Only recently just over 2 years of daily episodes, this dissociative derealization/depersonalization disorder is whats been happening and to begin to understand the condition further through videos like this is extremely helpful, so much makes so much more sense and hopefully i can keep hold of my actual reality. thank you for this video

[@yoan4152]

I found my de-realization feeling was an inner dis-enlightenment. A lac of light and electrical FLOW inside my brain and blood. Breathing continuously, longer & deeper (as Wim Hof breathing) brings back that FLOW, enlightening my sens of presence again.

[@kingnola..952]

Let's fight for a cure for this disorder that makes no sense to last such a long time 🙏✊

[@hippieatheart2667]

Wow. I am 65 and just learned this is basically me. I have not actually felt my whole body ever but is coming. I just feel it

[@MoisesMartinezJr]

The crazy part is that here I am (or am I?) reading these comments that recognize what I’m feeling, at the same time questioning if it is real in the first place to begin with. I feel better by not feeling alone anymore, but even that feeling doesn’t feel real, though I know that logically it is. This very thought, thought written by me feels like someone else’s character.

[@cananary]

that’s why this sucks so bad because we are aware and can use logic and understand our surrounding but nothing feels real

[@cherianelsy1771]

I too have this from the very childhood age. I never knew that there are people experiencing like me. What a relief when l came to know from KZbin that l am not alone.❤ But l lived each day and kept occupied myself and avoided being alone. l feel happy that if l can live these many years without losing control of my life l can live some more years. God has kept me alive🙏do this and you all be well my dears

[@tylerreynolds9991]

if you have DPDR.. (DONT PUT A VR HEADSET ON) it is a HUGE trigger

[@prodjedkiowa162]

ItzMystic omg ik it’s terrible

[@Matt-gk4jy]

Also, don't smoke weed. Huge trigger as well

[@argjilakrasniqi3888]

i’ve done that and i literally starting too break down

[@rosalindhoffman6175]

ItzMystic did it once, eyes didn’t feel real for a week. Wasn’t standing at least, but oof if I wasn’t with people who distracted me it woulda been bad...

[@DarkClouds-v8]

Wow. I’ve been going through this for years and last month the VR made it worse. I knew that it.

[@scoon2117]

It is the most terrifying, humbling and euphoric experience i have ever had.

[@jkerman5113]

Could you explain what makes it euphoric? Also if you have gotten rid of it, how you did it?

[@scoon2117]

@@jkerman5113 I'm not entirely sure, but it's like a reverted back to a child like state. It was weird that in the moment, I knew I was having a dissociative episode even though I'd only hardly read about it years before. It's like every brain cell was on fire. It was triggered by some extreme stress and some heavy drinking the night before.

[@toolazyforagoodname3105]

Idk if i have this but whenever i feel depressed when Im alone i feel as if anything doesn't matter and i feel as if i am in a dream and reality is fake and i have this fear as if my emotions are fake and i keep overthinking things

[@janice1469]

too lazy for a good name that is exactly how i feel. glad i’m not alone. at first i thought i was going crazy

[@limitlesszay4847]

Same here

[@hydehj17]

derealisation and depersonalization are symptoms of depression or anxiety

[@Vicdog408]

Y’all are not alone, you’re with me and many other people... just remember that whenever you’re having these thoughts.. it’s something that helps me get through/ rid of them

[@savannahj6660]

Wow. This video brought me so much comfort.

[@ohlouda954]

I am so glad you found solace in my talk!!! you are not alone.

[@william6734]

I have felt like this for over a year now, but finally i can pin it down. Sometimes i can’t see if i ever have felt truly well in the last couple of weeks, but i know that it always gets better. At the start it was constant, but now its just in spurts, short or long. Hopefully now that i know what i truly have, and know i am not going insane i hope i can put it to rest.

[@LilyStultz]

How are you doing now?

[@johncrowley2746]

Ive been dealing with this for 9 years and just recently found out what it was. I feel so releived. First time in 9 years i havnt been able to hold back tears

[@sanboi1905]

what was it?

[@johncrowley2746]

@@sanboi1905 depersonalization

[@0verIOrd]

Wow that sucks

[@taohiker1]

Meditation and chakra healing. This brought me out of having it for over 11 years. These two things will bring down your anxieties/fears and help you find the answers that are within you.

[@Nikita3909]

How does it help? Meditation only helps you get even more aware of it. Chakra Healing will make it surface even more!

[@minmon5512]

The derealization makes it hard to focus on meditating and from my experience only triggers deeper episodes. I'm glad it helped you but this isn't the answer for everyone.

[@ogcconstrictors6713]

Meditation helps in being aware what and why it’s triggered and therefore not triggering it

[@carolineno2581]

Beautiful speaker and beautiful person

[@sherisetodd7004]

I am glad she discussed this to help bring depersonalization to light.

[@divydwivedi19]

you are strong , brave and independent . I am sure you gonna get through this shortly . I had a massive panic attack an year back . From the very next day of experiencing that , i got depersonalised and derealised . Since then my thoughts , behaviour and movement is not under control . I am not me anymore . Imma changed man . One who is out of his body . Despite all these , their is one thing that always stayed with me are my hopes of getting back to normal which kinda drags me to a state where i feel safe and merry.

[@Vicdog408]

Divy Dwivedi never give up hope!

[@anshikachaudhary7886]

How are you now?

[@divydwivedi19]

@@anshikachaudhary7886 i am doing much better..anxieties on and off but i am good..keeping myself busy as much as possible

[@divydwivedi19]

@@Vicdog408 yeah man

[@anshikachaudhary7886]

@@divydwivedi19....how to deal with all these things.... literally today I felt like I am going to be insane...or am I really present inside my body....even after looking into tha mirror feels like is this me??......maybe I got stucked inside a cave or in a dream.... it's just scary 😭😭😭....can you please guide me please..

[@bluestardiamond84]

after 12 years its become the new me. i dont really remember what the old me felt like. the new me is not as social and is very sensitive and needs a lot of alone time but ive come to like it. i like how different i am. i dont feel like its a disorder. its a gift. albeit a difficult one to master and get used to. i wouldnt want to be anyone else. and i have used it to grow more deeply spiritually and to break free of all the old paradigms of reality that i once thought were true. i wouldnt have done that otherwise. having this gift has actually awakened me to REALITY. the old reality and identity i thought was real was in fact the illusion.

[@limitlesszay4847]

bluestardiamond84 youve been like this 12 years :/ its been 3 months for me i can’t do this anymore :/

[@jd49631]

12 years for me too, since April 2007, caused by chronic OCD.

[@bluestardiamond84]

@@limitlesszay4847 you can and you will do it :) push through it, you are the light, not the muck

[@LilyStultz]

@@limitlesszay4847 how are you doing now?

[@LilyStultz]

@@bluestardiamond84 how are you doing now? Any improvement?

[@kf785]

I have experienced this for 12 years. I have been to neurologists, regular doctors and they have been no help. I have learned to live with it but it takes experiences from you. You don't feel as much as you should and that sucks. I would just like to feel myself again.

[@angiegarcia5338]

Every since quarantine started I’ve felt iffy. I had an episode maybe 3 weeks ago and felt disconnected from myself for 2 weeks then had ONE week where everything felt somewhat normal. But then it came again this past week has been really hard i don’t know what’s real anymore. I feel more disconnected from the world than myself this time. It’s not the same feeling as the first time. I have no idea what’s going on.

[@Malakmalak-vt9md]

Metoo same 🥺 but we need a solution

[@angiegarcia5338]

Malak malak I recommend checking out Jordan hardgrave’s channel his videos really help 🤍

[@stridery]

How are you now Angie, one year later? I hope a bit better! My last episode was about year ago, I'm making progress :)

[@B4CKFL1PC1TY]

about 10 months ago, exact same thing happened to me. 2 weeks of this weird unexplainable feeling, then 1 week of normalcy, then boom, dpdr hits me like a train. antidepressants, vitamin D, magnesium, and jordan hardgrave videos have really helped. I now function as a D1 cheerleader for my university, however life is still really hard to manage with dpdr. I hope you're doing better at this time compared to a year ago.

[@AnimeRaindrop]

I got this feeling through smoking weed

[@mohamedal-bushra2003]

How are you now ?

[@AnimeRaindrop]

@@mohamedal-bushra2003 i still have it and accept that it doesn’t go away

[@cozmics1191]

@@AnimeRaindrop it actually can go away if you stay sober and stay physically healthy through exercise and mentally healthy through hobbies mind exercising etc

[@AnimeRaindrop]

@@cozmics1191 i don’t even care about having it anymore its whatever to me tbh

[@TinyBooBaddAf]

man i thought i was the only person. i used to be able to smoke frequently throughout the day but i truly think that weed along with trauma. did it for me. now if i smoke it gets bad i have thoughts that i never thought about last year. now weed scares me. if i do smoke my thoughts get clouded and i really start to believe i’m in a movie and something tragic is going to happen

[@MrSzoSs]

great positive outlook, by having the awareness that depersonalization has created new personality traits has created less significant and more managable depersonalization :)

[@lidestroyil1835]

I suffer from minor depersonalization and a lot of derealization, and a Generalized anxiety disorder. Been going through it since December 2021. It sucks and I wish none of us have to go through this.

[@ahmedcherif1350]

It's the worst feeling I feel like am dead or just a soul somtimes am inside a dream or an illusion.

[@lidestroyil1835]

@@ahmedcherif1350 I used to get anxious cause I would get the feeling of nothing being real and even thoughts about it would freak me out. It’s a slow recovery process for me. I’ve been doing therapy once a week, seeing a psychiatrist every few months, and have a counselor that comes about 3 times a week. I also get a variety of intrusive thoughts. Also, I get anxious over little things most of the time mainly thoughts though.

[@ahmedcherif1350]

@@lidestroyil1835 me too,I hope we all cet better

[@ahmedcherif1350]

@@lidestroyil1835 is therapy helping

[@lidestroyil1835]

@@ahmedcherif1350 yeah, it’s helping over time I learn how to communicate with the part of my brain that derealization and depersonalization happens

[@bluesageful]

I've had this for 47 yrs now. I'm 60. And after going through therapy, neurologist, and research at the local university, I can say that they STILL don't know what really causes this. And they can't understand it, unless they've felt it. The best therapy is staying productive. At least for me.

[@manelmanel-lh4nd]

can i ask you how you feel ? and can we recovered from this disorder

[@bluesageful]

@@manelmanel-lh4nd Yes, I over came it for about 20 years. During that time I learned to garden, crochet, paint..... creating seemed to be the best for me.... however, it came back when my daughter passed away. Now it's back to being uncontrollable.

[@bluesageful]

@@manelmanel-lh4nd This best advice I can give you is, if you feel it coming on, direct your thoughts into something else. DON'T dwell on the feelings.

[@elianalarocque9900]

too powerful!!! so incredibly well said. you are going to go places ms laura ashley

[@ThatgirlLondon.]

I’ve had dp and dr 24/7 for 13 yrs! along with ptsd, general anxiety disorder, depression, and bipolar

[@vreevroow]

Constant, intense derealization since age 9. No depersonalization. I am 27 now. It's like I'm on god damned opioids. When I dissociate hard, I will nod. It's debilitating.

[@pixel2.085]

I remember telling my friend a few week’s ago whare I feel unreal they don’t know what I meant so I left it alone today I figured out it’s a real thing and it feels good to know I’m not alone because I thought I was for as long as I can remember I though everyone felt the same but none could relate and sometimes I though and feel like what if I’m in a coma or I am the only thing that is real and that’s why I feel like I’m not if that makes sense ! THANK YOU!

[@davidleonard4534]

Thank you

[@Corsaan]

Writing this because I had a very strong episode today which I haven’t dealt with to this degree in years I’ve had this since a bad weed trip at 12 or 13 years old and experienced a lot of hardships at a young age I started smoking daily and freaked out one night, I thought I turned into a ghost and was living on earth or that reality had shifted or that I had woken up inside this life that was all a dream but whatever it was I was watching myself from inside on autopilot . I got stuck in the strongest depersonalization episode for months on end I would hope to god every night I’d wake up normal again but slowly over time for about a year or so until I got to high school I would go a few hours a day feeling normal but on edge waiting for it to come back and it would I struggled with it through high school in my own head all the way to now being 24 I will have episodes sparingly but live a completely normal life through high school to now and feel extremely successful where I’m at in life while also dealing with this you can get through it it makes me question how I even survived through this without ever getting therapy or care and not possibly taking my own life but I’m here now and can fight it better than ever you just have to harness it and calm yourself and ground yourself no one will ever understand what we go through so just know how strong we are to be able to handle this ❤️

[@loveormoney786]

I am going through this now. It really hurts like the feeling is unique for myself and indescribable as ti is for many others. Many would posit if you feel like you are not you why not think back on the memories and make it right? The thing is your memories feel counterfeited as well like you have not lived them and are disconnected from the memories as well. The biggest issue for me is the connection between feelings/words its almost as if words are hollow sure I understand them but not on a emotional level. I hang on always for my mom and my sister. At times the pain is unbearable and l feel as though I am already dead. Being 28 now this episode also hit me when I was around 20 as well. You'd think you could draw on the memories from the first recovery but this one feels even worse even the circumstances back then were much worse. One thing is that I am still there still reasoned and that is why this hurts all the worse because I feel as though I am going insane, yet which is worse going insane or being sane and feeling that you are losing yourself?

[@ohlouda954]

hey i'm the girl in the video! i am so sorry that you are suffering right now. i can relate to the feeling of memories and people fading during episodes. like the relationships i have are non-existent and such. you are SO not alone and once the quarantine is over i believe dpd/dpdr sufferers will ultimately be relieved in some sense. not completely but everything helps. if it is affordable for you i highly suggest seeking treatment it has been a life saver for me personally.

[@loveormoney786]

oh louda Thanks for responding. What you and other content creators do is gods work. The solidarity and understanding that this is not normal is helpful. Have sought out a therapist in my area and going next week. Best of luck to you and your family.

[@loveormoney786]

Alright can I offer a story of success the wheel has been broken in my case. This is how. Depersonalization is always reality based and although your reality remains altered you have to find a trigger from your childhood when the disassociation happened. Meaning you have to find the previous version of yourself and be strong prior to the anxiety being triggered. In my case it happened when I was 8 and I can draw on that through EMDR. Surprisingly I have been feeling emotionally really stable and connecting closer than ever with my family. In order to get out of this you have to have panic attacks and find the root of those attacks.

[@thesovietvorona1007]

I got this back when I was 14-15 from a mix of forcefully being drugged along with trauma. I’m almost 25, it’s still 24/7 for me. Nothing helps anymore.

[@WolfJulia2001]

Wow I never heard about this.. very very interesting! Thankful for being shared this experience

[@audunjemtland8287]

I got this 24/7 after strong antibiotic and heavy metal toxicity. And the main cause is Gut dysbiosis. Trying to re-colonize the gut to fix it. The psychological aspect is merely a stress response to the gut imbalance as the nutrient, proper nerve signals, mineral and hormone balance isn't met. Digestive issues are a big part of this.

[@jaja-zc1qz]

Ways I recovered from this was wrapping a belt around my left shoulder to my right chest with light tightening and go for runs everyday of 20-30 minutes; pressure finally started to wear off

[@Bjooooom]

how did wrapping a belt help you?

[@ZivTimmy1]

Thank you for diagnosing me!!!

[@izzybluebell8399]

The thing that triggered my DPDR is this ride in this carnival in which it's a virtual reality. It caused all of this and... yeah...

[@Vicdog408]

Izzy Blue Bell I would try and sue

[@izzybluebell8399]

Vicdog408 thank you...? XD

[@LilyStultz]

How are you doing now?

[@wazihanokshi2414]

I really like me.... that's the thing- I want to forget my traumas but at the back of my mind I do want to remember these feelings so that I may able to make a change soo drastic that no person ever has to walk through the same tough path I've been through.... I'm 21 now, Still dreaming- studying MBBS and hopefully one day I'll be a psychiatrist and work on the traumas that I and others face.......

[@tylergatewood1652]

FEAR FEEDS DP/DR!!! I’ve made it out a couple times. It’s the fear that drives it. It’s incredibly hard tame I know, but you can do it. Your mind is stronger than you think. My name is Tyler Gatewood, I’m releasing an EP in 2020 and I have a song about DP/DR. If you’re ever wanting something to relate to, give it a listen. It will he called perception

[@IzzyTheGamingNerd]

Have u released it?

[@tylergatewood1652]

izzy I have! It’s called “perception”. You can find it on Spotify and Apple Music by searching my name, Tyler Gatewood :) you’re not alone!! I promise you can make it out

[@IzzyTheGamingNerd]

Tyler Gatewood thank u so much

[@Sanaamahmood114]

I wish you well for the future, thank you for sharing ❤

[@brianrodriguez1030]

Mindful meditation is the best thing anyone can do for DPDR. Along with tha is analyzing your psychi.

[@netoonanimation15-2-23]

Don't give up. Nothing is permanent in life. One day you will start feeling normal like me.

[@eterrna]

Thank you buddy

[@STXRBOY999]

I suffer from Tinnitus, Visual Snow and both cause depersonalization and social anxiety.

[@dex466]

I am the exact same. They thought it was epilepsy and now have no clue

[@STXRBOY999]

Dex yeah same here, it sucks. try putting a piece of garlic in both of your ears for about 30 minutes a day - twice a week &’ your tinnitus will get better.

[@eijeurwass2076]

I have the exact same thing. Stay strong. This has ruined my life honesty

[@bellaj6931]

same here, the tinnitus gave me a sleeping disorder... so terrifying

[@STXRBOY999]

Bella J insomnia? &’ I wish you the best of luck w/ your tinnitus. try your best to ignore it and it’ll slowly get better. Use the tip that I gave someone. ^

[@danishmurtaza6739]

Having episodes for more than a decade, but you'll live with it.

[@augustviolin]

It feels like I just never truly "get" what life's about. Embodiment is strange to me. Depersonalization is the word for what I've felt since at least six or seven years old. I remember the first time I saw myself in the third person. I was probably five.

[@bishal645]

I am feeling crying hearing this and maybe I am suffering from this for last 4 years and I often get panic attacks !!! 😭😭😭😭😭 But I never have gone to psychiatrist !!! But I need to !!! For last 6 days I am suffering from intense panic attacks !!!

[@friedorange2853]

I LOVE LAURAAA FNDKS... literally the best

[@pauherrera8687]

Someone of you suffering DP/DR for years have studied a degree or is competing in some sport? That's my case, 10 years of suffering this, 3 years ago I started to improve but haven't dissapear completely yet. On the other hand, I have studied a degree and a master and playing football in competition, it has been very difficult but I have done it. We have to keep fighting, don't give up!

[@robertpinto9217]

I have had DP/DR on and off for thr past three months. Lately it is showing up again because of some stressful life events. The symptoms are strange to say the least. For some reason, looking at photos triggers it the most. I look at a photo for 1 second and it feels the effect from looking at that photo for 1 second feels like forever. I also noticed my hearing level improved greatly after I had the symptoms. The senses are under a feeling of extremely heightened awareness. It certainly feels like that. I keep telling myself that evrythingnis the same as it always has been. That is my coping mechanism.

[@xinyuee1860]

Only solution to be aware and not to fight the feeling

[@reduxverse2446]

Iv only had this experience 1 time last month and its absolutely terrifying thinking of if it'll happen again I'm so scared when doing things because I don't know if there are certain things that will set it off.

[@329beats5]

this is exactly how i feel and have felt for the past 2 ,2 1/2 years with random episodes of depersonalization i remember going to therapist after therapist different physiatrists tryna to find an answer but no one was able to identify it the only way i could describe it was feeling like my life was a lie but i didn’t know how i didn’t know what was real what was not on a day to day basis i described the panic episodes as a feeling of being unfamiliar with myself and all my surroundings then just feeling this rush of anxiety like something was after me.(i described this as if anyone has ever believed in ghosts at any time in there life it is almost a sense that you know something is there and you start feeling like your unsafe in a way you feel attacked from all sides but nothings there) then i just start screaming because i feel like i’m in a dream and thinking maybe if i scream it will wake me up, pinching my wrist bitting my tongue anything i can do to help myself “wake up” but it never worked. the feeling that you feel when this is all happening and even just talking about it feels so surreal and uncanny. then you feel these tingles in the back of your head right after the first couple times of experiencing the episodes when you talk about it sometimes leading into another episode. the thing that i hated the most was that during these episodes when i would try to pinch myself or do something to feel pain so ik i’m awake i was hyperventilating and wasn’t getting enough oxygen into my body and freaking out so much that my nervous system wasn’t acting the same that i didn’t feel the pain it just added to the feeling. over time it has definitely gotten better but i still do not believe it will ever fully go away there’s always going to be that question in the back of my head asking if this is real. but i’m hopeful over time it will continue getting better for myself and everyone else going through the same feelings and emotions!

[@toul100]

I have continuous depersonalization it’s 100% all the time.

[@fernandoparrassanchez7123]

I read a book about it and it helped me a lot

[@AverageMitch1987]

What book please?

[@mahmoudelsaraf1094]

How are you feeling now how recover from DP give me advice

[@darkkid4707]

I remember my first experience with this nightmare when I was on a picnic with my family and I felt like my soul is stuck inside my body I even told my sister to slap me because I could physically feel everything but it still felt like a dream ..I wish this never happens to anybody 💔

[@xzibit8teen799]

This is the loneliest feeling ever

[@zlobert9877]

A beautiful soul.

[@kx65andyx85rider]

I have HPPD and from my anxiety I have dr/dp. I felt this heavy.

[@Prevarant]

How you doing now? I'm on the same position to be honest.

[@sanboi1905]

how are you now