Male Rape Victims (Part 2) | Unpacked with Relebogile Mabotja - Episode 13 | Season 1

[@mmathapelomokwena4824]

As much as we protect our daughters, we also need to protect our sons. Thank you for giving male's a platform where they can tell their stories. 💔💔

[@pusheletsommatladi4686]

unpack is just so addictive rn, the host is absolutely amazing

[@thandy1173]

I'm stuck here too. Yhoo this show

[@kwandakwamantungwa_vocalpo4956]

May Okuhle find his feet, the world needs to hear his story.

[@preciousmahoko1668]

How I wish he was allowed to take part with a language he knows best he had more to tell us as well but language was a barrier to him

[@hilyam.i3226]

Yes please 😩

[@siphomhlangavula]

I emphathize more with Okuhle bcos 1can see he is still trying to digest the ordeal. He still has those feelings to deal with. And the bf or rather ex that just shut hom down when he needed support. Okuhle will need a lot of love to heal. My hearr goes out to him. Wish him all the best. Thanx to the rest of the panel for sharing their deep stories.

[@emmahmaepa7071]

i agree with you

[@modisedaeswatiniprincess6944]

I can see he is trying so hard not to cry

[@damariszuckschwert9489]

So true..,so sad.

[@originaltargaryen]

I hope we'll see you on the international stage one day, Relebogilo. You're amazing

[@relebogilemabotja215]

Thank you André 🙏🏾

[@margholtz]

I agree. Relebogile you have an amazing ability to talk about very sensitive subjects so openly and constructively.

[@tshepangmokwena8738]

So insightful 😭. We have a long way to go as communities, families and us as individuals.

[@relebogilemabotja215]

Really! There’s so much for us to still do. But what’s important is that we are proactively doing ✊🏾

[@FelixNyumbuSiyunda]

"No means no. It doesn't mean try harder." ~ Toki Profound and so true

[@stellamooibedi9027]

Okuhle sitting the like a lost child breaks my heart, he is deeply hurt tlhe💔

[@xolaniapologyngema7750]

Okuhle he is still in pain ... God have mercy to dis young man 🙌🙌🙌

[@zee4458]

Great Job Relebogile, I am obsessed with your show. I have watched all the episodes...you were born for this, your voice and interviewing skills are on another level. And you are beautiful. You are a professional, hope someday you will be big as Oprah Winfrey ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@euphoria5572]

This show is so informative. I have learned a lot. Relebogile you are such a brilliant girl. I really hope all this men here gets healing.

[@dumilendlela1212]

Relebogile am watching from Algeria 🇩🇿 and this has been really eye opening and sometimes parents need to be vigilant especially when their kid is very uncomfortable around a certain relative. Men must be heard too!! LovefromAlgeria.

[@lifepillars4u]

Watching from Kenya 🇰🇪 Thank you for opening up a space for these men to share their inner lives. It is one step closer to their total healing. 🙏

[@relebogilemabotja215]

Welcome to the Unpacked channel. Thank you for watching!

[@ms_nyakerario.]

🇰🇪 🇰🇪

[@cyliamotsoenengzengele]

I just know that I will be your guest one day, I am not sure my English would have been as good to hold a fluent conversation like these but I definitely am sure I will be sitting next to you one day.

[@Liz-up2ti]

Speak your home language and they will add subtitles... Don't let English be a barrier to all of our healing process... We need these stories to know that we are not alone

[@cyliamotsoenengzengele]

Our very own Oprah Winfrey 😍😍😍😍😍

[@katleho_Klaas]

Indeed she is

[@najeehaamid5194]

I know right, i think she's fantastic because she doesn't focus on celebrity sensation stories.

[@blairuiccoed]

Much much much love to Okuhle.

[@stellamooibedi9027]

So perpetrators are protected everywhere, churches, courts etc. Where do victims go for help???

[@taunotravels931]

I absolutely love these conversations, Relebogile! Very insightful and educational. Thank you so much for this and please keep it up 👍🏾

[@palesamasilo2135]

I wish I can give Okuhle a big hug...my heart goes out to all of you. Love and light.

[@sphamandlasakhilemdluli8971]

🙏🙏 thank you to all gentlemen for opening up with their ordeals ...I sure did learn alot🙏🙏

[@92Kandee]

WOW WOW WOW!! This entire conversation was so interesting and worthwhile; I definitely learnt something from all the guests. These men are brave to speak up about their experiences and I truly commend them for this. This conversation came at the right time, esp with the woman who was accused of raping the DJ and getting pregnant from that incident. I hope more of such conversations can be held on both public and private platforms. Toki was great and has so much to share! I wish them all healing and blessings. Thank you for this.

[@pontsomudau414]

May good God gives okuhle strength to heal😩🕯️🕯️🕯️

[@nonhlanhlahlatshwayo3342]

That guy is really hurt, and I notice he has anxiety😢😢😢😢😢

[@georgewabwire824]

Love the intelligence and depth being discussed here on this topic. The presenter is definitely a gem. The panelists were great. I really enjoyed watching. Thanks 🙏 for the show.

[@luthandotetani6657]

Big love and warm hug to Okuhle Sithole, May everyone who has experience such heal and have people to support. Society have a lot to learn about and to engaged in these issues. Thank u Relebogile Mabotya.

[@ntebophahlanef.n3233]

I wish ukuhle a speedy recovery

[@ruthsibanda2155]

Okuhles eyes show his pain

[@durbansaladyinaccra2173]

I also believe many will be helped by these 2 episodes. Please share the titles of Toki's books as well and where they can be found.

[@sepekomohololephalo2591]

Yoooh Okuhle o nroba pelo shame. What an ordeal, the braveness of these men. May they find healing!!

[@rdjalloh]

Relebogile... Wow you are amazing... Came across your videos yesterday and now i am hooked

[@lebogangmauco8150]

Wow! I have had an opportunity to be invited to attend the Standard Bank Top Women's awards in 2019 and one of the important subjects that were touched were raising both the boy and the girl child with equal recognition and attention because really boys children are also kids and need the same attention as a girl child, to help groom them (boys) not to be abusers due to bottling things up and knowing that men fight and do not cry because by so doing we indirectly moulding a broken society. I pray for healing for these gentlemen and I hope more and more victims would be encouraged to go out there to seek help.

[@PrueBurke1976]

Am so glad I came across this show, she is such a great presenter

[@noluviwentandane4892]

Yhoooo Relebogile, I've been binge watching your work from the upside of failer to unpacked since last year December 2023. And I must say this on behalf of anyone who's consuming your work, we are very lucky to have you and your team. I am blown away in each and every topic or content you embark on. Well done sisi to you and your team, this is amazing. Your guests on this one described a lot of what men are going through out there. I hope everybody finds clarity and the correct educational tools to heal and learn from this interview especially men. Because at the end of the tunnel there is light. 🙏🙏🙏🙏👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@gugunompumelelo1023]

Daily learning a lot from every episode... Always relevant open minded conversations...

[@lawrencedhlovu2021]

Thanks guys for share this painful story

[@stellamooibedi9027]

I think Okuhle needs therapy,he's still hurting and hasn't found a way of dealing with his ordeal 😭😭

[@mfundomagubane6565]

GBV is a serious issue,this program need to be funding

[@zeenclairntulii3919]

My goodness🥺🥺💔 Okuhle's story is too much.. I really do hope he gets therapy or just someone to talk to who'll be kind and gentle enough🥺🥺💔 Much love and light to him❤️

[@promisemunenyiwa5479]

thank you for this conversation

[@neomokwana6926]

My heart sank our men are going through the most 🥺 I hope Okuhle got the help he needed, this was sad to watch....

[@enelekeitumetse8490]

Thank you for this, I will it all boils down to how we raise our kids, let's change the narrative and raise them the same way as girls and teach them to open up and not bottle up.. 🇧🇼

[@mamellomaripa3946]

Spiritual bypassing 😭😭😭😭 The phrase I hate.."why not you" or "if not you then who"😭😭😭

[@madichakgamalahlela5084]

I feel like just giving Okuhle a big long hug through my laptop screen. Am breaking into small pieces inside . May you find healing, courage and strength to fight to get the justice you deserve. Those scumbags deserve to rot in jail period.

[@prettyngcobo8359]

Okuhle, I am sending you healing. 3 years is ago is very recent. I hope you may move on and live your life to the fullest after this.

[@reanetsemonokoane1121]

"I see South African humour as masking trauma" 💯💯💯

[@thepriestess5969]

Great work Rele, may I please suggest that Okuhle's story be re-unpacked as it is clear that there's too many layers in it left unpacked due to language barrier. On re- unpacking episode, he be allowed to narrate his story in his own vanecular please🙏🙏🙏🙏 Excellent work Queen Relebogile...

[@anammaqula6929]

Ohh uOkuhle my heart goes out to him He looks like a lost child, I hope he completely heal and be happy God be with you mntase

[@fundilephaqa1094]

This show is keeping me up at night.

[@stellamooibedi9027]

So when it's done by women it's not rape,abuse etc...helang basadi ba sotlana le bona in the same way men do,I wish and pray for more men,boys etc to come forward with their stories of any forms of abuse .

[@boipelomaseko2439]

Rele, I see a South African Oprah Winfrey😍

[@JudithNcapayi]

I hope the girl who was used by that 25 year old to sleep with Toki is getting help. Okuhle is really in need of help. I hope his partner will support him and give him space to deal with this trauma.

[@denelhorn4992]

'Most men are emotionally illiterate', such powerful words.

[@kidsadvancementmovementsa9744]

Kelebogile you are so intelligent. You ask all the right questions.❤

[@lukona_melento]

I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation.

[@stellamooibedi9027]

Awo bathong Okuhle 😭

[@bonniem5963]

The prison rape issue is incredibly insidious and weird, people seem to believe prisoners are subhuman and they seem to forget once these people are released they go back to being society's problem. How will we ever heal the nation if there are sectors of society and certain humans we are discarding?

[@kgaugeloledwaba391]

I feel like we didn't get Okuhles full story due to the language barrier

[@nontobekonkosi155]

I agree.. Ufuna ukukhuluma isizulu

[@thepriestess5969]

Hw should be invited once again, be assured that it's okay to engage in his own vanecular.

[@stellamooibedi9027]

"You felt violated " it's so dismal of one's emotions of violation and for me the perpetrator is not sorry!!

[@doremi131]

I am sorry for all that the victims of rape went through. It is always the MOST TRUSTED and the closest person to the family who does the UNTHINKABLE. There was a traumatic TV coverage about this in the Republic of Ireland not long ago. Most men in their 50's, broken and suffering silently for years, the series say it happened over a period of 73yrs, IMAGINE Right inside the Roman Catholic Church. From the Magdeline home for women to the confessions of a nun(s) - to this. We came here 2001 and the schools were boys only or girls only. I remember saying to the then Principal Mr Cagney, I have 2 boys in the house, their friends are 2boys, x 2 and 3boys x2, how and when are they meant to learn how to relate to girls as adults. Later on the school started opening the primary school to girls from the lowest class.

[@sharonmaia2044]

Starting watching relebogile's show i think 2 weeks ago on 1 of da topics of a male who was an A+student n i sat n thot how cud 1 person as beautiful as lebo be so brave n courageous n so understanding of all these situations in my tym growing up i used 2 watch felicia mabuza n her shows were js an intense n intriguing its a gr8 pleasure watching u lebo mch luv n respect 4 u n thank u 2 da individuals dat cum n share their stories thanks 4 being so open n brave in wat u do i appriciate u!

[@marygorettichepseba3326]

Woow can't stop listening,,learning alot about male rape victims

[@tshepangmokwena8738]

It would be really interesting and insightful to get the perspective of a perpetrator 🤔. Like they said 'don't help them out the river, find out why they are falling into the river'.

[@relebogilemabotja215]

I agree with this

[@ZiyandaSureZee]

Totally agree, maybe find someone who’s served their time to come out and talk about the reason behind their doings..

[@stacyannjohnson4219]

The young man in the red cap, everytime he open his mouth even my heart cry, I wish there is some way I could take away his pain. I pray my boys will never be in this position

[@xolelandamase5976]

Okuhle 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗❤️

[@lionessnala2000]

Okuhle's story is too painful. I can't cope with this...

[@rellieeustance8339]

I wish them all the healing

[@africanma_mii6984]

Okuhle I'm worried about you 😭😭😭

[@keitumetsemohlala5112]

Me too his in so much pain hle

[@nosihlekhumalo9200]

I feel like he is on the edge one trigger and he might take his life ☹️☹️☹️ he is in so much pain

[@stellamooibedi9027]

So in a nutshell what a grown up says no matter how absurd it is,you must run with it!!!so much unlearning to do for the society

[@Ndunawe53]

Yoh great show .

[@palesabahetane2183]

Yoohh...Okuhle looks so drained yoohh

[@nthomengmajara8575]

I hate how whenever we discuss church in sexual assault everyone jumps to the Roman Catholic Church as though it is the only church guilty of such when every other day Evangelical, Methodist, Baptist, Anglican and every other religious denominations are in the news for that. Aretha Franklin was violated in a Baptist church headed by her own father. Many people from the Nation of Islam have come out in numbers. Churches are no safe spaces for many.

[@thepriestess5969]

True

[@lethukweyama4352]

Okuhle needs therapy🥺

[@leratomoraka2332]

Kelebogile can see that Okuhle he is not English speaker but she insist on interviewing him in English

[@thanduxolontshangase8385]

I feel sorry for Okuhle. He need therapy

[@sharonmaia2044]

We nid 2 protect our children period💪💪💪😢😢😢

[@stellamooibedi9027]

Thank you Relebogile for doing this 🙏🙏

[@mphomajoro5509]

Yes we may believe you that's fine but how do we deal with falsely accused perpetrators? I mean there are people in jail right now who have been falsely accused, how do we deal with people who use the system for their own gain. Thank you

[@brandenmotsa7239]

The reality is we fail at addressing the issue because we fight an identity instead of the act using statistics. Now what I mean by that is for example if alot of Black people murder and kill more than any other race we look for a label for such and in most cases they are demeaning for instance we come up with Black People Are Trash rather the reality is Perpetrators are trash, Rapists are trash, Murders are trash and in saying this its quite clear to everyone that of you commit such a heinous act you are a horrible person. Being a man is not trash being a black person is not trash because that is your identity. This creates a division because how do you expect me as a man to stand with you when you are saying my identity is disposable if we are saying Women's Lives Matter we can all agree because its an agreeable statement you don't have to be a women to agree, if we are saying #MeToo we are opening arms to any victim which is a unified approach to a unified issue. I've seen alot of "men get raped to but more women...." or "why are you talking about men when we are talking about women". Violence is violence and these labels and narratives that we put on them have segregate us instead of unite us. Men have no place or hashtags that cater to their sexual assault experiences. Society sees us as perpetrators as though not human enough to experience such a traumatic thing. I myself went through such at the age of 15 by an older woman in her late 20s or early 30s who was our helper and that's just me pinning the middle of it all.

[@lindiwemnguni8826]

humanity 1st as much as woman are important and fragile so does man so we need to adapt our old ways to new ways of living man can be abused and be raped and this is so wrong and they must also get justice just like woman humanity and equality should be prioritised full stop.

[@marygorettichepseba3326]

Ave been a judicial officer but never handled such a case,,blame entire society for masculine toxicity

[@petermaluleke7011]

Wait did that man say it's okay to have peodophilic thoughts? okay maybe let's rephrase that

[@Nunu-xm3ux]

Definitely used the wrong terms

[@ShantyKganyagoVlogs]

Ya

[@petermaluleke7011]

@@minniekay240 interesting, my initial reservation was the fact that thoughts get acted upon eventually

[@durbansaladyinaccra2173]

The principle behind what he said is that thoughts pop into our minds without our control similarly to the way the Bible talks about temptation, but it only becomes wrong when u dont reject them and now go and put them into action. When u find that rejecting these thoughts has become a serious struggle then it is time to get help from someone who is qualified to help you and not just ignore them until you give in and act on them.

[@petermaluleke7011]

I think I understood the principal and that's exactly why I think he could've phrased it better

[@kaleahcollins4567]

Let's not just point fingers at the Catholic Church because in all religions you have officials. Be holy men and women who do these things and Islam you had many Muslim boys and girls who was molested and the schools by their imams and you have a Buddhist children who are groomed and Tibet under the religious guys you got Hindus you got all types of people who have all types of religions who have these kind of perpetrators it's not just the Catholic church because in the Baptist Churches there's perpetrators anywhere you have people who have some kind of authority and the ability abused their power you will find perpetrators remember the saying absolute power corrupts absolutely when these religious figures of all kinds are given absolute power or any figurehead like you said we are taught to respect our elders were taught to respect authority so they have absolute power they know they have the absolute power so it's going to corrupt it's easy to corrupt