Malignant Narcissism & Our Undoing as a Species | FRANK YEOMANS

[@3beanmachine126]

The Old Storyteller - "And a Man sat alone, drenched deep in sadness. And all the animals drew near to him and said, "We do not like to see you so sad. Ask us for whatever you wish and you shall have it." The Man said, "I want to have good sight." The vulture replied, "You shall have mine." The Man said, "I want to be strong." The jaguar said, "You shall be strong like me." Then the Man said, "I long to know the secrets of the earth." The serpent replied, "I will show them to you." And so it went with all the animals. And when the Man had all the gifts that they could give, he left. Then the owl said to the other animals, "Now the Man knows much, he'll be able to do many things. Suddenly I am afraid." The deer said, "The Man has all that he needs. Now his sadness will stop." But the owl replied, "No. I saw a hole in the Man, deep like a hunger he will never fill. It is what makes him sad and what makes him want. He will go on taking and taking, until one day the World will say, 'I am no more and I have nothing left to give.'" ~Apocalypto

[@skronked]

Mel Gibson's dad

[@fredwinslow744]

Thanks for that. It is excellent

[@jaimhaas5170]

@@fredwinslow744 I liked it too. Not sure if it means we are never happy...or never stop wanting...maybe both.

[@jaimhaas5170]

@@numbercruncher6242 so the more we question the less we know? Sometimes it gets to be too much. I've always enoyed a good thunderstorm but as I started learning about all the science and math involved I started to enjoy it less. If ingnorance is truly "bliss" then perhaps we can understand women better.

[@LIVdaBrand]

Brilliant.

[@angecynthia347]

Truly!!!! When you have a relationship with a malignant narcissist.... You get a never again moment...you can never look back because it is horror

[@RebelUrNarc]

I THOUGHT the nightmare of my childhood could never actually happen again. I am 53 & now homeless in hiding, after losing my 23yr business, finances, friends, family, peace of mind, etc because I was manipulated by a dying woman, who'd been married to my dad's best friend 45yrs, into helping her misunderstood man-child with a TBI & needing assistance to get on Disability. Now my life &freedom threatened for 7 months & police won't help cuz my dad got to them 1st & said I was dangerous& wanted to kill him. Insane! I'm not the one with a homicidal rage problem.

[@LouAlvis]

i hear this story too often the maalefactor, gets there first,, @@RebelUrNarc

[@kaystephens2672]

I believe there’s a direct connection to mothers going to work and the needs of the child not mattering. I’m all for independence. But this lack of a rock to depend on, definitely has had some effect on our species. You don’t make a baby tough by ignoring its cries. You make a very scared, insecure, frightened child by being tough on an infant. I knew a man once whose mother told me they’d let him cry it out all the time. He turned into one of the most pathetic, mean and nasty creatures I’ve ever known. It’s more than a lack of love. This show of selfishness in our species, to me, is the consequence of our confusing culture. And it’s a domino effect that affects all of us by creating mental disorders. I had an adopted sibling with special needs. Empty promises I’ve seen many times. We need each other, and a tv and a computer just aren’t the same as real connection with reality. I see the rise in the dirty laundry coming out whereas before, it was taboo. Hence, the rise in coaches and therapists scrambling to cash in on our loneliness and aftershock of our comparing childhoods. We’re all good enough. It just depends on who you listen to and believe. I had an acquaintance who once told me”Put your faith in God, not in man”. Well, he sure had a lot of faith in me when it came to me paying his bills and giving him a life where he could play. It’s these kinds of people, emotionally immature people, who are the problem. These spoiled brats whose mothers felt guilty for being sorry mothers and told them the lie that they were so special. And they believed them. Life’s too easy and convenient. And that’s not natural in the real world. Strange times we live in, for sure. We all deserve a turn to live, to experience the joy of life. Especially our children who only need their parents to spend time with them and let them just be. These generational curses are real. There was a bad apple somewhere that needed to be controlled. Not be in control. I’ve seen this many times. Someone who didn’t have a conscious running the show but made all the rules. We need to address these mental health issues in our country. And I believe the Reagan administration was to seriously consider for this rash of irresponsibility to our species. Sane people have rights too. And that’s what I see from my own experience. Equal rights need to be earned. Not just given freely due to unrealistic expectations that life is fair. A good movie to watch is “Seize the Day” with Robin Williams and Stiller. The epitome of this topic ahead of its time.

[@yellowdayz1800]

I married one.. He did reactionary abuse on me. After I was free after 12.5 years.. I started to have panic attacks etc how about you?

[@danielscheff7384]

The depressing thing about learning about narcissism is when you realize that no matter how well you come to understand it, nor how well you come to understand your loved ones who have it, there's no fixing it. It helps to know that, to an extent, so you stop bashing your head against the wall, and can learn to protect yourself, but at the same moment, you have to mourn the loss of loved ones, be they parents, siblings, children, friends, co-workers or whomever. Mourning the loss of someone that's still alive, and maybe still in your life, is a dark place to be.

[@jl4091]

Mourning the loss of a something that was never real.Mourning the loss of a fantasy inside my head.It's always darkest right before dawn.The sun finally came out for me,and I hope it comes out for you as well.

[@juicyparsons]

Well said

[@hammbannana1038]

Yes. It is a process of mourning for sure. The first peace I ever had in my life, and it was so sad.

[@alainvosselman9960]

I have the same thoughts. There are many of them around me. Not all narcissists but also anti socials. It's the most dystopian experience. I became aware about 5yrs ago. Deep into recovery now, getting better day by day. Stay strong and thanks for sharing your thought !!

[@htpm325]

Agreed. It's a dark place when you realise you have been surrounded by narcissists your entire life and as you shed all of them there isn't anyone left and you are alone with your knowledge. And even when there are one or two friends left they never fully grasp your situation. That can actually be a blessing in a way because it forces you to engage in other topics. There is much more to life than forever ruminating about narcissists. At a minimum as we move forward any future narcissists we meet have no chance of gaining entry. Peace!

[@joserrapere5928]

I have been a psychologist for over 30 years. I, too used to think educating people would make changes in how we see our world. Education has been so important in developing my own values. But I agree, raw emotion and the need to feel good about oneself and "right" is far more powerful in so many people today. There is a reason treating people with personality disorders takes years and dedication from those clinicians who have them as clients. But unfortunately those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder almost never get help, because they believe they are fine and everyone else is broken and misinformed. And personality disorders are going up in frequency I think for a myriad of reasons. And we elected a version of this as our country's leader at the moment and continue to deny science in ways that still floor me. I can only hope this horror will wake us up... be our next "never again" moment. I believe evolution is a continual back and forth with miniscule forward movement. Because we do not live very long, and the next generation is influenced by temptations (the falsehood being sold to us in modern materialism and the insatiable desire to fill ourselves) before the wisdom of the ones before have a say. I am hopeful that we are learning ways to change ourselves and communicate better so that the next generations will respect us and not write off everything we say. A lot of us, the elders, are not setting good examples. So many people are not able to communicate with those who think very differently without getting triggered into rage. I am hopeful with so many of the Millennials increasing in emotional intelligence. But there is still that disordered underbelly of very poor self awareness. I do what I can for myself and others, and it is scary.

[@grayshus6706]

I think that the social, cultural and economic forces driving and rewarding narcissistic behaviour overwhelm any impact that education might have.

[@gabrieldamasceno3971]

It is so so so scary. I’m so blessed to have a few good people around me or else I’d want to die. My faith in the universe (god) helps me tremendously

[@wantandlike]

i'm a trained biologist, though my specialty is not in evolution. If i may, I share your fear about our race. Extinction of species has been the reality on Earth. With the destruction of both the environment and collective good will, we are left with malignant individualism. All empires have failed as yet, and there is no reason to assume a global one will be the exception, unfortunately.

[@9000ck]

I'm a psychiatric trainee and I agree with you. The only hope, I believe, is to act as a sane person in this increasingly insane world. And to do that not only requires empathy and care, but it also requires healthy boundaries. This is possible to do. It is the ideal of the maternal. The maternal is a force that has been so denigrated and marginalised by our economic, social, political and educational system. The maternal is the counterveiling force of the narcissistic; the maternal is the projection of empathy and care into the other with consistency and skill. The maternal is not martyrdom. The maternal does not seek it's own aggrandisement or it's own destruction, but it seeks authentic fulfillment, it seeks to grow and nurture the other and to do that requires the self to be nurtured, maintained and grown. Like tending to the soil as well as tending to the crop.

[@Misses-Hippy]

@@gabrieldamasceno3971 When I think of the universe, I think of a bunch of flying rocks, gasses, and other stuff. How does that help?

[@downhilltwofour0082]

I think it was Mark Twain who once said, "Show me a person who says civilization is advancing, and I'll show you an egoist."

[@EbonySeraphim]

That’s very interesting. While I would say we are generally advancing as humans, I don’t necessarily see a moral advance. Aside from a bit of people versus people oppression and war that is reduced in the world, I don’t unequivocally believe human life experience is made better by our advancements. No don’t rewind the clock necessarily, that would cause discomfort, but if the world was knocked backwards a few hundred years in terms of tech advancement, people’s lives would be more local and possible more fulfilling on average. Death would happen, but under different circumstances.

[@Nancy-yw1rr]

This is so bleak, but for anyone who has had an " intimate" relationship with a malignant narcissist, this rings 100% true. Their immediate emotional needs always drive their behaviors, and they just can't recognize that- even if you see it and try to talk with them about it. They would rather destroy their own families than accept any information that they do not want to hear. I never could have imagined such insanity until I lived it with my ex spouse.

[@akschmidt2085]

We've all had a relationship with Trump, so...

[@fredwinslow744]

@@akschmidt2085 then you don’t know what TDS is or narcissism in fact you may have features of vulnerable narcissism perhaps

[@landenhanneman5901]

Im guessing he was black? Quite severe in that sub culture

[@pedrocoentro2009]

Same here. It takes time to heal, now we can see the signs before at least. Good luck for life!

[@shanabell8603]

@@fredwinslow744 the fk?? Trump is the BIGGEST narcissist ever!!

[@soul2deep578]

This man is smart and has a heart. We need more people like this on this planet.

[@sarahs5340]

I dated a malignant narcissist on-off for five years. He was the most charming, intelligent and entertaining person I’ve ever met, and also the most intrinsically evil person I’ve ever met. As time went by I began to noticed his attempts to destroy me or destroy my life; almost like it was a natural impulse. He never seemed to be fazed by the harm he inflicted while manipulating and using others. Witnessing the malignant narcissist up close is shocking to the point of preferring the state of denial - if not for the persistent churning in my gut.

[@kaystephens2672]

Absolutely. Mine told me that I was his "investment". They are so smug and sure of themselves that you almost believe they posses an ounce of anything good. Your life is just a game to them. Where your feelings are an inconvenience for them. I believe this comes from a state of denial we had to live in as a child who had to flatter a fake adult. A fraud. But they they're very, very sneaky. I had an adopted set of parents who lived in denial of their sons mental disability. And they almost fooled me that it just wasn't that big of a deal. I'm the scapegoat and was cast out of their tribe. But I'm glad I was because I'm not a retrobates mind like I see in the hive of them. Shame on them. I give it all back to them. That child destroyed my mother's mental health. And I now say, if you can't take the heat, just get out of the kitchen. Some things are just impossible to tolerate and it's ok to say, "I'm not as mentally string as I thought I was. It's ok to ask for help and to humble oneself. And that some people are just better to love from a distance. They just don't let you love them. Because it's just too painful to take that risk. Sad. We need to heal as a soceity from all of this pain. It's not invisible and it's finally being hung out to be healed. It's ok to be human. We're not robots or Gods ourselves. We're just mere mortals.

[@wolfgang7812]

"Sometimes I think narcissism will be our undoing as a species.." The gentlemen is not far off with this quote.

[@nikiyoussef55]

Antisocial personality disorder is far worse than narcissisme actually the type of narcissist he is talking about is mixed with antisocial personality disorder

[@bellakrinkle9381]

Indeed. We are truly seeing "it" in action, as we speak. Please observe where our species is, only one year later from the above comment.

[@tdang9528]

​@@nikiyoussef55 Narcissism is an addage to APD. It is impossible to find a person with anti-soc PD without narcissism.

[@sunnyadams5842]

I KNOW IT IS the downfall of society. It is happening all around and inside us.

[@sunnyadams5842]

​@@bellakrinkle9381Scary, hu??!😮 'It' is happening so quickly, people can't or WON'T SEE IT. GO SOLAR AND PLANT FOOD!!

[@rosemarieramsingh8749]

"Like lemmings over a cliff" great quote!

[@ThunderAppeal]

Yes. Are the people who believe this buffoon.

[@danielepp3113]

Falsehood created by Disney. Interesting irony.

[@theartzscientist8012]

I can’t believe this wonderful man just made sense out of my relationship with my Dad.

[@enricomiceli8704]

Yep mine as well

[@sunnyadams5842]

You are not alone!!

[@lisabowden402]

My mother

[@cassandrabrookover3085]

This guy's voice is so comforting. The diction, the timbre, the speed, etc. are all so soothing

[@rachelsimbhu4383]

I love this Dr. that I feel like I'm in love with him ! He's extremely soothing reassuring to my soul !

[@gfbjo]

But his explanation seems like he is absolving us of the need or way of action to fix the problem. And this we must recognize and not accept. There is a way out of this mess. The size of corporations is so huge that they have almost complete control and they keep buying more control and install garbage souls like ex-pres 45 as their puppets. There is a better way (see my full reply).

[@akschmidt2085]

@@gfbjo Hes not absolving us from trying hes just lost hope it's gonna work. And he's right. We don't learn and we will self destruct. Soon probably. Maybe a bit later. But have kids at THEIR own risk.

[@akschmidt2085]

But the content of what hes saying is gloomy

[@blodknut5595]

Yet the content of what he is delivering is less than comforting when one considers how hopeless he views societal change in the face of annihilation.

[@wordswordswords8203]

I have a couple of comments. 1. I have narcissists in my family. Um, long story short, just stay the hell away from them. They are full on nuts and if you try to figure them out or get along with them in any way it's like walking into a fire. 2. As far as humanity as a whole, most people are just incredibly dumb. They do not think things through, learn from past mistakes, etc. Yea, sure, there are some smart, thoughtful people out there but unfortunately they can't offset the destruction all the idiots. Ok, just my observations from living for over 5 decades. Good videos. Thanks.

[@opopopop6286]

I have the SAME amount of time. I have VERY different opinions though, although with some similarity. There IS A TRUTH underlying the surface level you have scratched. Think of it this way perhaps. ONLY THINGS WITH PROPER BALANCE can have any sustaining power in this place (reality). So therefore IF what you see is 100% true, then we can see how things are going to work out in short order according to EXACTLY what this OP video is stating. Just like what you are. HOWEVER even a cursory glance at the material in this video unveils the speaker AS AN EXPERT IN HIS FIELD< yet one that is typically engrossed IN ALL THE HALF TRUTHS / PROGRAMMING bandied about by the mass/alt media (and therefore of BigBiz that runs it 100%) this works out to me as IRONIC in ways...of coarse another important recognition is that NEGATIVITY generally happens to be MORE ENERGY sucking powerful than someone using positivity. So what you get are videos like this one, MIRRORING most of what you have in the media as being slanted towards such in order to siphon more of that "loosh:" so to say!

[@garysandiego]

Over six decades here. It gets worse.

[@fredwinslow744]

@@garysandiego read the comment above and take two Tylenol

[@fredwinslow744]

I hope In walking away you have found sustaining and consistent trusting and reciprocal relationships ….. if you have not. Go back to a professional and see what you might have not learned or missed about yourself and humanity which as a whole is “dumb”. Hint -unless you were speaking about all of us as a whole and not literally , then consider that thinking your family is full of narcissists and the world of people is dumb sounds a little like some thing doesn’t it ??

[@opopopop6286]

@@fredwinslow744 hhaha, typical NPC type comment, yes :) ignore everything which you have zero capacity to understand due to your limited programming...you do seem slightly befuddled when it comes to understand some of the super basic concepts I was hinting at easily enough. It is ok though, you can look at all these comments as simply rhetorical. You being an NPC which is part and parcel with big business/big pharma and the mass/alt media you will have ZERO ability to answer me in any cognizant fashion anyways. I would be foolish to expect anything else from someone who from all examinations is far more akin to a biological robot than anything else at this point, in addition to one who mostly seems to have had GIGO (garbage in garbage out) programming for far too long, maybe shut that boob tube off for a bit and learn something TRUE instead, like from experience.

[@jiminy_cricket777]

Thank you for posting this, any clips you post of Frank Yeomans are always a must-watch for me.

[@purplesue66]

Agree. Pretty good description.

[@zoecat2000]

He’s akin to a rockstar or a famous philosopher in my book. If we could replicate him and his consciousness, his keen insights and subtle wit, it would be a boon for civilization. He’s an enigma in that he appears kind and gentle, but he’s actually a very strong and tenacious individual. Anyone who can weather the transference of these empty vessels that he works with every day with fresh hope and optimism and peer reviewed studies is super human in many ways. He’s my hero. Healing the world one psychopath at a time, the same way one eats an elephant, one bite at a time.

[@rypoelk997]

I feel like I could have a 12 hour conversation with Frank Yeomans. Very insightful individual and I appreciate his nuance on these questions around narcissism, which often seem to come from a place of compassion for these individuals.

[@nightowl6260]

Envy of others who have a meaningful life...and how is envy acted out?- it destroys the envied object/person.

[@lizstromsnesdolz629]

That's why Trump hates Obama, or JohnMcCain, anyone who is loved

[@siyaindagulag.]

Let them knock themselves out. Retain for yourself a modicum of consciousness. True to one's self that is .One of such malignance, values only that which they can steal, ( or barring that ; deatroy)and will remain a thief and a murderer of the human spirit.

[@toadinthehole8085]

Envied , new word to me cheers.

[@cyndigooch1162]

​​@@lizstromsnesdolz629 I've heard people, including self-aware highly narcissistic individuals, state that Barack Obama is one of their kind though, which makes sense and it's on a spectrum anyway! He did seem to show some empathy, unless he was acting, like they often do, yet it does explain why Michelle Obama hated her husband for about ten years. 😊

[@sunnyadams5842]

​@@toadinthehole8085Check out the diff between ENVY and Jealousy...not many use either correctly, but once you know the diff, it's clear as a bell! Have Fun!!!❤

[@Pongant]

Would it be possible to prevend malignant narcissists from running for office/leading positions? Something like mandatory psychological screenings as part of all applications for higher positions

[@lindatallon4036]

The narcissists will be the ones giving out the tests!

[@juliaf7068]

@@lindatallon4036 ☺

[@breatheliveandthrive7404]

Yes. If you own a business and searching for ceo to run your company, mandate any candidate to obtain personality profile test and have it assessed by a mental health professional and at the same time, investigate their previous employment history in search for trail of destruction.

[@soul2deep578]

That would be amazing

[@soul2deep578]

@@breatheliveandthrive7404 most corp people hire narcissist because they usually can bring in the money and won’t get distracted by caring for people.

[@spac3craf]

god i love this man. he says what people need to hear.

[@tahwsisiht]

That is why you NEED to make sure that you NEVER settle with one teacher, one view. If you listen to only one view, especially only one person, you WILL become unable to see things from outside of your box. Even when you have a good teacher, EVERYBODY has a blind side, a shadow, a place that is not fully developed. With one teacher, you WILL lose your ability to think for yourself or to think critically. The only thing you are doing is reciting your teacher, without ever using your own mind. You willingly gave up thinking and reasoning.

[@Alsatiagent]

This is why they want to destroy public education. So much harder to manipulate students.

[@rubberbiscuit99]

Yes, and it happens in a slow, bit-by-bit fashion, so the loss happens under the level of consciousness.

[@brucecaldwell6701]

@@rubberbiscuit99 I agree. I'd like to see a big study on how social media affects this change in people & to what degree. I think it's responsible for driving a lot of people mad.

[@ironempath7261]

👍🏿 ♥

[@melissahoffman9433]

🙏🏼❤️🧠💪🏼

[@cbrashsorensen]

Like most people, I struggle with facing the "truth" spoken here but deep inside I SEE it though I want to run and hide. I am so grateful when honesty wins out over trying to make me feel "better" as if PRETENDING (denial) is better than KNOWING. Some days I am so sorry for myself that I have to be here to watch the human species unravel before my very eyes but it is undeniable.

[@beverlyjones4645]

Your so good at exposing this to others. My understanding comes only from finding my self embedded in a narcissistic family , my husbands. So naive and trusting, I was eventually blindsided and the pain I experienced was / is difficult if not impossible to explain to others. So I stopped trying. I survived and people like you helped me…… thank you so much……

[@themoontoonshines923]

I so identify with your words! But I’m leaving my narc husband for good… I actually see the light at the end of the tunnel and I see the light in me that got dimmed or totally died from the combination of the narc abuse and my attempts to avoid absurd, uncalled and unexplainable fights that came out of nowhere!

[@cyndigooch1162]

​​@@themoontoonshines923 I really hope you managed to get away safely and totally "get" what you meant about the bizarre fights out of nowhere, hence why it's no wonder many people who've been through it tend to "walk on eggshells" with nearly everyone! ❤

[@MicheleLHarvey]

A very timely & important message to understand. Since life is the ALL of it (good & bad), we as thinking humans must accept this fact in order to work within that understanding. Those that can't see outside themselves, or imagine a larger picture spell doom for the rest of us. Historically, the narcissist's Trojan Horse move is their charm + entertaining quality. The distracted audience doesn't notice their pockets being picked. Rome's Coliseum was a monument of diversion for the masses. Our ignorance of narcissism is at our peril.

[@barrylyndongurley]

Just as we keep an eye out for rattlesnakes in the forest, we have to be observant and vigilant against allowing narcissists into our lives. As the world's worst recidivist in this respect, It's taken most of my life to finally figure this out, but now well worth the wait.

[@kmcq692]

Most of us were raised to avoid expressing weakness, grief, or anger, or any real connection to mortality and loss. The more you repress or fight against a thing, the more powerful it gets. Or so they say. Maybe this rise of gross death wishes is because we have shut down genuine expressions of respect for mortality?

[@trafficjon400]

yes and no one wants to retake it back so we are on the road to a war. one would guess.

[@opopopop6286]

@@trafficjon400 according to human history (which is as error prone as ANYTHING on the boob tube or big biz itself in case you were wondering) there have been like wars ever couple years/decades. So you would think that with LESSONS like that, it would balance things out. Thing is most people are MORE LIKE (or exactly) programmed NPC's so therefore have ZERO choice in any of this. There are others who are different though rare such as myself who have ONE or more choices in each situation, so of coarse they get to steer their destiny so to speak...this is DRAWN from matrix theory for the most part. Yet this theory as it stands in the mass/alt media is only a half truth (at best), so A SENTIENT SOUL should be careful where they place their knowledge as true!

[@trafficjon400]

@@opopopop6286 I don't really admirer opinions but all our half tone comments nuanced are such. no one answered unfortunately any exceptions taken but thats the way the bouncing ball directs us. lol😁😉

[@trafficjon400]

@@opopopop6286 not saying any ones knowledge is half true.

[@cynthiacole6140]

Especially men. And it seems there are many more males with this disorder.

[@33vortex]

I've been talking about this since 2017, it's very encouraging to see the growing awareness. It's imperative that we come to terms with human nature and learn how to deal with it. For the first time in human history we can scientifically understand and correctly diagnose these individuals, and they have no place in public offices but our social tradition means that's where they more often than not end up. Career politics and lobbyism combined attracts people who wants to be corrupted. It is the biggest question of our time, I would argue; What are we going to do with this new understanding of ourselves, and how?

[@bushzzz]

idealogue

[@grb1969]

Indeed, awareness has been growing. Existential concern for the crisis of Civil Dislocation is normal. Either we figure out how to govern ourselves equitably or we will meet a swift and sadistic end. Even if there may be only a few generations left before self-annihilation, what matters is how we treat each other along the way. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and perspective.

[@steviecrow914]

Have seen how this persona works. A few “benefit” by their proximity to the malignant narcissist. They will excuse, justify and look past repugnant actions just to retain their money, power, status as it’s attached to the narcissist.

[@realmofoz]

Our ENTIRE government is built on this, and society is it not? We are screwed as a species if we don't find a way to change it, but I fear the only way these people will wake up is when it's only affecting them, and by then it will be too late.

[@angaeltartarrose6484]

Very insightful remark.

[@mmxw2294]

My father has a lot of money and I chose myself over money

[@theguaable]

In a family system, including an extended family system, this can happen as well even when material or power motives aren't obvious. I guess it's just a fear of upsetting the narcissistic boat, and of the family unit disintegrating. All very strange really. Narcs are kind of like terrorists. By the way this can happen in groups of "friends" also.

[@antoniolima1068]

@@mmxw2294 money cant buy integrity and that is directly connected to Self Esteem, the source of happinesse and freedom, money fuels ego and delusions, a crafty managment of perception but with time you can see the emptiness through cracks, existence is way more than what we perceive.

[@joeywall4657]

Narcissism is a label thrown around so freely these days. I'm glad I watched this video for clarification. And to exclude myself.

[@BBFCCO733]

That means you are probably a narcissist.

[@hfortenberry]

He was mainly talking about the worst form of narcissism, malignant narcissism, like you had with Hitler and large cult leaders (David Karesh, Jim Jones, Trump, etc.). Most narcissists are the grandiose and vulnerable type. While they are not the kind to try to affect whole large populations of people, they will still destroy the lives of everyone around them. And these types outnumber the malignant type by a lot. I’m so worried about the human race and our planet.

[@Cherrysmith2809]

This man is brilliant.

[@tylercriss6435]

I know through my own experience that these societal ills are present, for they are present in me. I hope that we can find a way to improve, both as individuals and on the societal level.

[@clemchirpich4907]

Thank you for sharing your understanding of this world of ours.

[@trillianmcmillian2660]

Thank you so much for your insights. I work on the floor with severe psych patients and your youtube helps center and guide me.

[@gamatron17]

Victims of this type of abuse are commonly left with no resources they can use to escape the situation; the abuser has stolen their finances, their identity and has turned the victim's own family and friends against them, due to the malicious web of lies and deceit that have been woven. The victim is trapped with no way out...or at least that is what they are made to believe.Although victims go through what can only be described as being dragged through hell backwards, narcissistic and sociopathic abuse via heightened communication is so difficult to pick up on the human radar of perception that the victim is usually left scratching their head asking, "Is it me?"

[@tulinbeyduz920]

My dad was schizophrenic, my mum was sociopathic and borderline personality . Me and my twin sister were taken off my mother . She is 71 now , she still doesn’t acknowledge the abuse or how I lived in ten foster homes. She’s created a new world 🌍 she thinks I’ve made most things up . My mother wasn’t envious but she was two different people . Her rages and lack of care for me were scary . I’ve had my own daughter and turned my life around . I still suffer anxiety and panic attacks but I’ve created a kind and good life with my animals . I haven’t been able to develop personal relationship with men however ..

[@hippopotamus6765]

they are uniquely able to conjure any "facts" that fit there ever changing narrative to fit their worldview. Your story is touching, all the best for your future.

[@AntoDesormeaux]

I celebrate your achievements

[@tulinbeyduz920]

@@hippopotamus6765 thank u ☺️

[@tulinbeyduz920]

@@AntoDesormeaux thank u 🙏

[@9879SigmundS]

Obana: "We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek,"

[@MishaGreer]

Thanks!

[@deboraho6779]

All so very interesting! And concerning, “narcissism could become the undoing of the human race”. It causes me to wonder, why are we not teaching children about empathy as a part of our social educating. The lack of empathy or rather this overgrowth of apathy and a constant need of self gratification, seems to be snowballing this overwhelming growth in narcissists. Add the pathology of people’s needs to always have a group or categorized groups of people who are judged and deemed as beneath them, also perpetuates this vicious cycle. Philosophically/Theoretically I wonder, would we as a whole, have a better outcome if we started younger and taught our children how to be empathetic with their peers, &/or with others outside of their own sociological economical realms?

[@bradsanders6954]

I dont think empathy can be trained into someone. If you have no empathy your born that way.

[@p.bamygdala2139]

Brad, I hope that's not the case. Hope.

[@Jen.K]

It's useless to teach people about empathy, if they don't already possess it, you will be teaching them how to better fake it, and thus making them more skilled at manipulation. Cluster B type personality disorders are developed in children through abuse and trauma experienced during their formative years, usually at the hands of their own disordered parents. This is a legacy getting passed down from generation to generation, only now, it's more visible, because of our current information systems. Broken people creating more broken people. We all need to look into ourselves and see where we are part of the problem, and stop. If we each took responsibility for recognizing our own brokenness, and healing ourselves first, the world would change for the better. But right now, everyone points their finger 'out there', as the other person being the problem, as the other person needing to change. It's that person who is bad, or that group which is wrong. We are just helpless victims and they need to change. But the reality is, the only thing we have power over is ourselves, we have the ability to change our response to the narcissism which seeks to devour us. As adults we are able to say no, and walk away.

[@notwhatiwasraised2b]

@@bradsanders6954 of course you can teach someone to notice and consider others feelings

[@welshreaver]

@@bradsanders6954 Unfortunately what you say is true. I think it could be ingrained but it would take a humongous effort to almost brainwash people into a state of empathy. That being said its interesting to note that the urge for self indulgence is generally present across humankind currently. Could we cross the divide and make it to the other bank of empathy? I hope so.

[@ebrennie]

“This is not gonna be a bestseller; this is too grim.” This guy is so deadpan.

[@jakedee4117]

Generally speaking I agree with this. One key to spotting these people is to note if they have a deep understanding of nature, not just humans. People can be emotionally manipulated but not reality.

[@nightowl6260]

Our species prioritizes immediate comfort. /gains. But more so, we prioritizes discomfort avoidance, especially emotional pain. For example the avoidance of self-accountability and responsibility--it seems we are experts at rationalization and blaming others so we do not experience internal pain (shame, loss, fear, uncertainty) and the work it requires.

[@fndngnvrlnd]

Agree!!!!

[@siyaindagulag.]

Bang on!

[@gymather3097]

Yep that is exactly right

[@duewhit310]

I heard of a study which rats were isolated and given a choice of 2 water sources one of which is laced w heroin. And yes they drank to death. But in a different experiment someone made a huge playground where they were not isolated and the layout of course stimulated them as did the sense of community. And they did not drink the heroin water. From a tedx talk about changing the way we think about addiction (in general).

[@lesilluminations1]

You need to post a link for so bold a claim.

[@krismodrow3993]

I agree with this and have been so anxious and depressed about it. I have said for a long time that greed would be our undoing, but that is too simplistic. After learning more about narcissism, this makes sense. It feels hopeless.

[@alainvosselman9960]

Even though this is very bad news, it comes as a relief to see there are individuals out there who see, feel, experience the same thing. There's a lot to be said about narcissism but the thing that is kept completely in the dark is how this illness will probably end the world as we know it, it will be horror and it's very nearby. I fear narcissism just as much as an atomic war so to speak. Hope more people will wake up. Also, not all people who suffer a cluster b disorder have bad intentions.. this thought is important i think to prevent ourselves not getting caught in what narcissists would do, generalize and destroy.

[@crina193]

Wow! Hat off to you, dr Yeomans! You address things very clearly and on point, yet in a very gentle and compassionate manner. People need more therapists like you. I m not a therapist, but i see things exactly the same, yet, i must admit, my lack of patience diminishes that compassion you exude. 🙏🙏🙏

[@AnnaMishel]

There is a % increase in narcissism/psychopathy resulting from our technological advances (i.e., easy travel). A narcissist, can leave a town where he is know to be “bad” and move to another country overnight, where he is not know, and he can charm, pretend, dominate, lie without being found out, have children with a few women, (some of which will also be narcissists). And that’s how it grows . . Rinse and repeat!

[@cyndigooch1162]

A Mishel That's exactly right and the last highly narcissistic man I got caught up with used to go from place to place, then back after time had passed and even said that he moves to another town, or state, where no one knows him! It was extremely easy for him to find new targets of all ages as well, because he attended AA and NA meetings and church etc where they're generally accepting of troubled, or downright dangerous, individuals. He's also charismatic and friendly, along with being domineering, hence why I used to think that he could've been a cult leader, especially due to fact that many people take others at face value. 🙁

[@bellakrinkle9381]

Yes, and so can traveling nurses and doctors - I find them in all hospitals and health organizations. And it's not country to country - more like state to state.

[@regaininglife9084]

Social media as well.

[@isabellesender]

Very true. One is not held accountable as one would be in a small village with nowhere to go.

[@CF-wn2ce]

Probably the most truthful 10 minutes on KZbin. And yet heads are stuck in sand with our asses roasting.

[@TimeWarm]

😢 Trump may be like this. I'm not going to support him this time around

[@stevendame4404]

This is not only thoughtful but also accurate for this period in history

[@allthewayfrom]

9:50 part of the reason is business "leaders" are incentivized by our current economic system to maximize short-term profits over virtually anything else. Shareholder Value, 401Ks...comfort basically, like he said. Thank you for coordinating, filming, posting all of these wonderful interviews!

[@tboned1]

I've lived thru this narc aggression...it is terrifying

[@chosenone7634]

Yes sir in the work place in the public sector, management with this malignancy is a serious treat to humanity and life. Experience some serious stuff. Even a smile from me can trigger real real rage from a G.M.

[@Prometheuspredator]

I as well have experienced the repercussions of a malignant narcissist boss/director. I called him out and filed a grievance against him, and hired one of the best attorneys in the city. He retaliated in various ways as in one incident he brought a rifle to the office in the hopes it would promote fear for my life and quit my job. It didn't work as he hoped as I stayed in my position for almost two years until I found a new job. I worked in state government for almost 20 years. He targeted me from day one. He was ruthless and brutal in his position as our personalities and work ethics were different and sinse so he hated my guts.

[@MultiSenhor]

"Illumination" of the masses has to go through these steps: Basic resources (access to housing, food, security, sanitation) -> Social order/comfort/community/family (institutions, support networks, good transportation, jobs, places to go, traditions, good habits as part of culture, things people can rely on) -> Education (focused on children rather than adults; knowledge, understanding of logic, understanding of logical fallacies, understanding correlation vs. cause vs. short term and long term consequences) -> Emotional/psychological healing. Some countries are ahead than others in some of these departments for at least a parcel of the population, but this often doesn't work if there's too much inequality and some people get access to thing and others don't, whether they "deserve" it or not.

[@user-ed7si9no7i]

This is so true. Having experienced multiple malignant narcissists as well as watching world leaders I'm continualy disappointed in humans. History lays it out and in this day in age there's no excuse for ignorance. Critical thinking is needed but is woefuly lacking. Are we all susceptible to this, yes we all have times in our lives were more vulnerable but really.....?.... I've watched family members want to be "taken care of" not wanting to make decisions. It's beyond me.

[@RalphDratman]

"How much damage needs to be done before people come to see the risk in these things." My guess is that quite a bit of damage has to take place. Our societies can cope with some kinds of damage, but not all. I fear that in today's urban or suburban world, if something is going to go seriously bad, it will either be averted and thus not be so bad after all, or it will not be averted and will become catastrophically bad.

[@bobdillaber1195]

I agree with everything you said. An objective, accurate statement about/describing the only two roads which lie ahead for us - and we soon must choose only one. Those roads are: Accountability Anarchy Only one will be chosen.

[@elizabethr4107]

I've been a climate research scientist for decades. I knew everything had to be done since 1987 when I was a child. I went into the industry early and effecting positive changes on an engineering level became my passion. Nothing cld have surprised me more than the general publics cold indifference and cooperations' need to make a profit at all cost, despite the near and long term ramifications. It's sick.

[@robinriebsomer4607]

"Our Achilles heel is our need for comfort" and I would add convenience. What are we willing to give up to save the earth? Will we forgo air conditioning? Will we lower our thermometers in winter and bundle up? Will we stop using refrigerators at home and instead shop for food more often or grow our own? Will stores stop providing shopping bags? Will we agree to mass transit? I hope narcissism will not lead to the destruction of the earth. I think our extremely individualist society cultivates selfishness. I wish like Buddhists we all really wished for all sentient beings to be happy.

[@BrianButterworth-s4z]

Gill Bates and Al Gore surely will not.

[@burneyvisser]

There is not much that gives me more pleasure than listening and trying to understand individuals who are much smarter than I. Hypnotic

[@JamesMandolare]

Narcissism: The Other Pandemic.

[@marcharsveld2914]

That cannot be beaten too.

[@kaylaschroeder1]

Narcissism: The *Real* Pandemic

[@nukethenarrative5873]

@@kaylaschroeder1 yes. Narcissism is the only pandemic.

[@kaylaschroeder1]

@@nukethenarrative5873 I'm not sure if it's the *only* pandemic, but it's definitely one of the most serious.

[@bellakrinkle9381]

The question is: which will arrive for the taking, first?

[@annjohnson4723]

Unknowingly, I suffered through 55 years of narcissistic abuse via my father (in name only). He was never a Dad to my disabled brother and I. He abused my dear brother in the most cruel ways all his life, simply because he was intellectually disabled from birth. Our father treated him as sub-human, a disgrace and embarrassment to the family. During our childhood, there were beatings on a weekly basis, often resulting in blood noses and split lips. The verbal abuse and screaming at us were a daily occurrence. My dear brother and I grew up as nervous wrecks, with zero self-confidence, and scared of our own shadows. The lasting effects of narcissistic abuse continued throughout our lives. My father also abused my dear Mum psychologically, physically and otherwise. It was only when researching on the internet 12 years ago, that I discovered the actual definition of narcissism (if only the internet was around 50 years ago). The stories of the sufferers of this abuse, was like watching a movie of my life. In my senior years now, I'm very gradually gaining self-confidence. It was sadly too late for my dear brother and Mum, who both died way too young. My father's narcissism had a major bearing on their tragic, early demise.

[@ktb183]

The only antidote I can think of is responsibility. The fuel of the narcissist is blaming others, i.e. not taking responsibility for your own condition. People who come out of abusive relationships have to re-learn to stop blaming others, as it seems to stick to you. When you understand that you are responsible for your own actions, you actually also gain (your own) power to change your own and hopefully others' situation as well. It requires a certain training, but can be done.

[@hjillumi880]

i could listen to this guy all day

[@motogp001]

An interesting side note about Lemmings. They actually do not commit mass suicide by jumping off of cliffs. The image that we have off Lemmings throwing themselves in mass off of a cliff comes from a production called “White Wilderness” that aired on “The Wonderful World of Disney” in the early 60s. This production was filmed in Madagascar. It has been substantiated that for theatrical effect, cameras were strategically set up on and around a cliff and a mass of caged Lemmings were released and herded over a cliff. Along with that came a commentary about the poor dimwitted Lemmings committing suicide. It was indeed very dramatic and also very painful to watch. This is how the Legend of Lemmings following each other to their certain demise started. It was a produced story. It was a lie. It was fabricated. Lemmings do not act in this manner. Sadly you can ask just about anyone these days and they believe that Lemmings blindly follow each other over a cliff to their death.

[@SarahHorne1]

That’s really horrendous and sad - but thank you for spreading some awareness about lemmings!

[@tartgreenapple]

I saw a video on this, but the lemming story is so repeated that even genius people repeat it.

[@warthog473]

If you repeat a lie often enough, well, you know the rest.

[@mancubthescrub]

Thank you so much for this video. I'm getting closer to the answers that were never given to me, how my mother was gaslit into killing herself by someone with NPD.

[@doomedtolinger2213]

This sounds so familiar and so sad; the emptiness inside would seem intolerable.

[@PK-re3lu]

When they commit acts of terrible cruelty on 'loved ones' believe me it helps.

[@pikiwiki]

Finally. Someone who doesn't paint over the details with a label of "evil" or "demonic" but can parse out the parts that make up this sort of behavior.

[@monicajones6531]

This man is extraordinary. He knows what is going on, he knows society's real issues. I won't go into detail, but i've been through what he is saying when he talks about "groups" of people. I feel it and see it being more socially acceptable, and it is such a wicked way of being :(

[@lyndraski4152]

I love this guy! He's like your favorite college professor.

[@lilmoth227]

I think it's important to take into account with the climate crisis that most working class people don't really have a lot of options when it comes to being more eco friendly. A lot of the eco friendly options are too expensive, take far too much time and effort, and aren't as available as the cheap and easy alternatives. Most working class people aren't privileged enough to have the money, the time, or the resources to even CHOOSE the more eco friendly options. I think it's important to hold industries and large companies to higher standards instead of putting ALL of the responsibility on the individual. Yes people can make small accommodations here and there no problem but a lot of the other good options aren't as readily available to the working class. Capitalism inhibits positive growth because capitalism prolifically breeds narcissism. But yeah I definitely agree with the rest.

[@BorderlinerNotes]

Really good point about the cost and time to be eco-friendly and how onus should be squarely on the companies producing the detritus - albeit we can all take some responsibility. But the media does place much of the onus on the individual where we, as individuals need the big companies to make major midcourse correction for our efforts to be more impactful.

[@photoniccannon2117]

Exactly. Folks like myself can’t afford to buy Teslas and nice electric cars, for example. Until these are affordable, there aren’t many options for us. And we can’t just stop driving to work either. They keep raising gas prices hoping we will drive less. I already drive as little as possible. Raising the prices won’t get me off the road any more. It just means my grocery budget sinks to make room for higher gas prices.

[@RawOlympia]

The super rich are filling oceans with mega yachts and jumbo jets ~ thinking of Prince Harry flying around the world to tell us not to use toilet paper, from a castle! Or John Kerry, et al. It's great to be minimal re: stuff. But each class has its faults, it appears ~~

[@grmpEqweer]

@@photoniccannon2117 OPEC actually has a sort of "sweet spot" they aim for in allowed production quotas. They want the maximum profit they can reach without motivating a mass exodus from petroleum and to alternatives. Just noting.

[@nonconformist9991]

When one half of the people envy the other half for their ability to consume the resources of this planet everything will be destroyed and then and only then will they realize that you can't eat or drink money and possessions.

[@corpesdiem100]

I have always seen a link in social context & individual narcissistic disorders. Thank you for explaining so well.

[@mmanda515]

Agreed. The unfortunate example set over & over in every industry & all the way to the top... has become NOT following through or being consistent. NOT enforcing rules, boundaries, laws... NOT calling out & holding people accountable unless/until they have proven otherwise over time... NOT issuing tangible consequences for, that then... people feel remorse, have to make amends to whatever degree... earn... deserve, etc. As is, there's little hesitation to even consider any risks or loss... what's at stake. No longer is there, "omg.. how could I? why would I? ... but, what IF I?!" w/ the integrity, compassion, empathy & insight... to consider yourself, those around you, those who might be impacted by & everyone, as a whole. Instead & by the examples set... it's prob. just looking around thinking, "Pfft.... well, why WOULDN'T I??" Esp when, time & time again... more just say/do in any given moment, whatever they think will work... to get their OWN wants/needs met, period. Lie, stretch, manipulate, shift blame, gaslight, etc.... facts, truth don't matter. Worse, imho... is the example has become to do that & whatever it takes... bad behavior, wrong choices... aren't stopped UNTIL it gets to such a point, it might impact someone else a lot bigger & their $$$$$ or reputation. Bad behavior, choices, wrong-doing... constantly has been quickly forgotten about..... being enabled.... supported..... given attention, praise, benefit of doubt, chance after chance... encouraged & even usually... handomely REWARDED too. THAT, has been made the example of 'success'. From people, to parents, teachers/schools.... influencers, brands, media platforms, news, jobs, authority, courts/judges, lawyers, government, leaders, ETC. People seem to be lacking integrity or a moral compass, compassion & insight.... instead, doing whatever they selfishly want to, no matter the impact to anyone else. Not just getting away with it..... but again, being rewarded for, which only encourages & sets the example others then follow. Idk how, but only with setting a better example & holding people accountable across the board.... being considerate of others & promoting/supporting those who do right. Being able to count on.... & someone's word actually meaning something. People being a lot more genuine & integral. Imho, it's cold, careless, manipulative, self-serving & super narcissistic instead... Only getting worse by the day, too. Critical thinking, cognitive reasoning & any sense of logic seem to have gone out the window as well imho. Seems like living in crazy-town or.... the Twilight Zone... ? Esp these past few years. ..... it's as if the masses have been brainwashed or... ? Maybe hearing the same misinformation over & over on 10's of thousands of different media outlets...? Things I purposely avoided, but... hearing some people who I'd never guess could even have such thought processes.... idk.

[@wil7803]

I love the way, while watching/listening to this brilliant, simple explanation of the main cause of all Man-made suffering in the world for centuries, the Ads interrupting the 10 min. talk are about a product/service to, "wait-for-it", help one to "Feel better about themselves"..... "Emotions" & "Feeling GOOD about oneself" are the main pursuits of the new Gen X/Y/Z as they happily cruise the "Metaverse" New Reality !!!! Any REALITY that impedes their quest for emotional personal happiness at all times WILL BE CANCELLED!!!!! The "Malignant Narcissists" are taking-over Western Society!!!!!

[@acertree1980]

I immediately thought of Jim Jones after you mentioned "malignant Narcasisist and cult leader". He was the epitome of sadistic grandiosity

[@marcharsveld2914]

Mao, Pol Pot, Stalin, Hitler.................Jim Jones

[@user-kr911]

This is the first I am hearing about the death drive. But man I’ve been getting that feeling as I’ve learned about the malignant narcissist. They seem very primal in a modern way? As if instead of growth they want regression at all costs. It almost feels spiritual in a way.

[@ericvosselmans5657]

Both my mother and my current 'Housemate' (that's as far as I am calling it now) are narcissistic. Constant emotional needs, only able to ever talk about themselves and noone else. Every single thing needs to be turned around into something that they experienced. Everything is about them and about them alone.

[@MrEnglar]

We are lucky this deep knowledge is shared with us. Thank you!

[@jillnelson8746]

Isn’t self esteem the antidote? I’m amazed at “Christian” people who are blind to narcissistic disorder in leaders

[@tabathaterry2998]

Ohkay girl you said it thank you!

[@Alsatiagent]

Self-esteem almost always has to be formed in ones early years. Traits of narcissism are passed unknowingly from parent to child. Fred Trump had a father just like Donald Trump had a father. They are victims of this disorder as well as perpetrators.

[@themachine5647]

@@Alsatiagent Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not necessarily passed on nor inherited, and is often displayed in people from perfectly healthy households, BUT if someone has a *predisposition* to developing NPD at an early age, then a toxic family life may indeed bring it out. It's also worth remembering that some of our very best people have come from some of the absolute worst conditions in their life. We all have free-will, and even though there may be outside influences, in the end, it all comes down to the choices we make about who we are. Unless you have a physiological reason to not be able to process these thoughts, as many do, you will have the choice to think about the way you think at some point in your life, and almost all of us have this choice. And almost everyone is appalled by the knowledge that we have this power and will do anything to absolve themselves and hide from that accountability.

[@Rain9Quinn]

There is a some significant research about narcissistic leadership in the church. Where this is an organization, narcs will find their way to positions of power! (Not just christian churches, mind you -I’ve only read a massive Canadian study of a christian church system & seen reference to other studies in the UK and someplace like Norway?. But have witnessed it in large Buddhist organizations too)

[@Rain9Quinn]

I think empathy and less self-absorption is at least as important as self esteem...

[@joefox9765]

We don't need many psychologist. All we need is to listen to Frank Yeoman. This is not an understatement but a fact. If only my parents or the rest of the world could have taken in this knowledge

[@briancase6180]

This needs to be viewed and understood by every living human being. As for the human impulse to pursue anihilation, it stems from the bare, base need to survive. It drives us to each consume every possible resource in as big a quantity as possible AND to exclude others. What does a mother do if not deprive others so her offspring can survive? It's only with intelligence and education, knowledge, that this base drive can be moderated. That's my take on it. And: of course; of course narcissism will be our undoing. It already is. Who wants to be CEO? Who wants to be CEO of a tabacco company? Who wants to be president? Who wants to be CEO of a coal company? Who wants to be CEO of a drug company that jacks up the price of an orphan, life-saving drug? Who wants to be the biggest hollywood actor/actress? It's a self-selecting group. Who wants to be the on-screen expert in a movie about narcissists? Oh, wait.... Sorry to be so blunt.

[@jillnelson8746]

Wow nailed this!

[@maton100]

Ernest Becker's "Escape From Evil" further vindicates Yeoman's analysis.

[@HotelierNYC]

Apparently the denial of death is (ahem) just the nature of things.

[@jacquelinecoudret5497]

My dad was a textbook malignant narcissist and he was a walking conflict. I forgave him...old age made his mask fall off and his agression became more of a grumpy cry for help. The promises of a malignant narcissist dad never come true and the punishments are cruel but they dissociate you by being so much fun and mine was intelligent and charming as well. He has passed 3 years ago

[@annjones9635]

The man is spot on, the human race is like a runaway train, it keeps breeding, consuming, destroying at a fast pace and we don't seem to be able to stop ourselves.

[@mad_cat_1st]

We are a virus, and the Earth is our host. Eventually, the Earth's anti-bodies/immune system will kick in and expel us.

[@annjones9635]

@@mad_cat_1st Hopefully we have more self-awareness than a virus, but it's possible that we don't.... pity.

[@tartgreenapple]

Makes me very curious about the future 100 years from now.

[@annjones9635]

@@tartgreenapple If we keep on this path, it won't be good.

[@paulryan2128]

I'm afraid, Mabel, that what you describe is in our nature ... it's in the nature of the beast to breed.

[@keithstewart7514]

My now 86 yo MCNarc mother had DEMONIC joy from telling me I could never compare to my brother. Two years ago & I'm now 60!

[@luisgallegozaragoza]

Hi, my parents have BPD and they say that I am crazy only for the sake of protecting themselves, I'm 27 and I done myself in the past all kinds of test to prove that they are wrong but they refuses to receive therapy what can I do? They tell everyone in my family that I'm crazy and I mistreat themselves

[@luisgallegozaragoza]

When I was 18 my mother treat me telling that she will receive therapy if I tell one psychiatrist that I have a lot of problems like drug intake violence etc which they are false, I though in that moment that that psychiatrist would have a kind of test on me but that's not the case and she lied again (all of this after being caught by me cheating my father... AGAIN) and she started making up the idea in everyone that I'm crazy what can I do?

[@K-A5]

Im sorry youre going through that with your parents. Look up Kris Godinez video on "the Identified patient/scapegoat" for insight on why your parents try to put all the blame on you. Also look up "grey rocking" and use it. Also look up the term "projection" because thats what theyre doing..theyre projecting onto you by calling you crazy when they know deep down they are the ones who are not well. Dr Ramani has a video on the word projection that explains more. Learn about J.A.D.E - Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain ..and dont do this when talking to your family because they dont want to sincerely communicate to solve any problems or have a good relationship with you or anyone else. They are mentally ill and they just attack..like if an animal had its leg trapped and you tried to help it, it might bite you because its in so much pain its scared and angry and doesnt trust anyone. Thats your parents and people like them. Its not your fault, and you unfortunately cant help them see the real you. My parents dont see the real me either. It hurts so much, but the best thing I can do is keep my distance from them and stay no contact or low contact until they get themselves some therapy one day, or at least apologize for how theyve hurt me and start wanting a genuine relationship with honest and respectful conversations. Theres also a book called Adult Children of Immature Parents by Lindsey Gibson that is very helpful. And a book called Stop Walking On Eggshells by Paul Mason. Another good book is The Emotionally Absent Mother by Jasmine Cori. And Lisa Romano's channel is very helpful too. So is Allan Robarge. The best thing you can do is stop arguing with your parents, try to minimize your discussions with them and really try to work on yourself. Learn how and what good boundaries are, and stsrt practicing them. And also practicing loving yourself - including realizing that you dont have to defend yourself to anyone, including your parents accusing you. If they wanted to help you, theres better kinder ways to help you than just accusing you. I hope things get better for you. Check out the CPTSD subreddit on reddit too for a support group of people raised by dysfunctional and emotionally abusive parents.

[@zardoz7900]

I glued myself to the floor. Frank would be proud of me. I'm raising awareness.

[@mich1074]

The Maronite Catholic Church of Sydney, Australia has a particular one of these who leads a mass of disaffected middle-aged single men, who otherwise would be classed as 'losers' (I may have been one of them to be dragged into the group in the 1st place). I tried to fight back after hearing my name being dragged through the mud and left it at a stalemate after he reacted to my ridicule by approaching authorities saying I had threatened to kill him... inside the church. The police advised me to take out an AVO as protection but I refused. I think the lunatic is still dragging people around until today and although I felt some responsibility to reveal the truth to the community, it seemed futile as the people are attracted to power and not truth..even if its just a perceived impression of power. I used to wonder why God would allow these people to roam around in society as well as the church, and the only conclusion I could make is that God allows people to be fooled and so uses narcissists to expose (at least in a spiritual sense) those who are more inclined towards evil. The narcissist has no power without the flying monkeys and herein lies a large part of the problem. The fact is flying monkeys love narcissism because it equals power.. they almost represent cowardly narcissists who just could not make the leap to becoming malignant. The narcissist represents the flying monkey's own ideal, and if people were not so insecure and needing approval, the narcissist could not exist.

[@binathere2574]

This is how I learned not to be a part of an organised church or an organised anything for that matter

[@hfortenberry]

As a wildlife biologist and environmentalist, this question has plagued me for years. I am continually trying to figure out how we can get through to people with regard to global warming and other environmental concerns. I was always of the view that people just need to be educated and then they will act accordingly. But after watching how our country reacted to Trump, I’m even more discouraged. But I just keep trying and being hopeful. Giving up is certainly not an option. At least not for me.

[@angaeltartarrose6484]

I think it might help to be really supportive of the early family of origin, to make sure these are healthy relationships, healthy places to raise children, easier to be able to get out of & be financially supported as single parents, & that the rich, controlling, narcissistic &/or abusive person does not get granted custody. We need to be watchful that early sexual abuse does not take place, as it seems to be a crucial point for creating a disassociated self. It is not the only cause of narcissism, yet it is often present, so it is significant.

[@matthewfurnari-omara2079]

Thanks so much for your courageous work.

[@lilis182]

I love frank yeomans and all the borderliner notes videos. I also think that simply focusing individual psychopathology in the current mess we are in bypasses the fact that the system is sick . capitalist realism is the death cult. radical systemic change is needed. take away the malignant narcissists and you still have acceleration of capitalism that eats and appropriates dissent. . a figure like trump is part of a corrupt system. I love the work of mark Fischer and David smail on the intersection of mental illness and social injustice.

[@jillnelson8746]

Simply said: the “me” generation who has not practiced delayed gratification.

[@Shogun708]

@Ange there have been narcissists from the beginning of time, well before capitalism was developed. You are putting the cart before the horse.

[@Shogun708]

@Ange to paraphrase / butcher a Churchillian quote ‘capitalism is the worst of systems except for all the other systems which have been tried from time to time.. ‘ To claim capitalism is based on narcissism is to know nothing of economics and civilisation. Where is your evidence for your contention

[@criticalthinking8665]

Here's the problem. Capitalism although not perfect does bring the bottom up more so than say a forced socialism because you still have mentally sick people in power under a forced socialist regime. The cure is personal development and a socialist system that is A. Not forced and B. Not under the guise of take care of me because I deserve to be taken care of. Everyone wants socialism until its asked of YOU to give the majority of what you have to someone who has less so that you can both be equal.

[@luciaaa233]

you nailed it. I understood it too, but was too lazy to make a statement. In fact, Capitalism is just multiplied version of an individual narcissism. It's like Fractals. Individual narcissism; then system built on narcissistic principles. Mentally healthy species lived/would live in communal societies (like Native Americans, f.i.). But "western capitalism" is plain MN multiplied

[@tartgreenapple]

I love this guy, so insightful!

[@Eric-ot7en]

Can't imagine who this might apply to.

[@marcharsveld2914]

To all of us.It's a warning for mankind.

[@gauritiwari4802]

Very insightful. He has a way of explaining concepts with clarity and simplicity. I Always watch his videos.

[@ignominius3111]

What should be learned from the lessons of history is that human emotional nature can’t be changed by reason.

[@ayatflashfish]

Thank you for sharing this ! . Powerful message ☀️✨

[@MsNooneinparticular]

The antidote is giving people dignity & meeting their basic needs like healthcare, education & job advancement opportunities. Fascism prospers where poverty & ignorance flourish. The rats only tapped the drug water when their environment was deprived of activity. Look up the "rat park study". When their lives were enriched with community, activity & meaning they no longer chose the drugs.

[@Yetipfote]

I think showing people how joyful just sitting and doing nothing is, is not a bad thing. All the outer materialistic pleasures are great. But so is feasting, relaxing, resting, pausing, contemplating, doing "nothing" (we can't ever do nothing actually but you get the idea)....

[@heathercruz8282]

True we need to communication never again... its seems hard to except that we shouldn't allow people to get away with asshole behavior

[@karlataylor1172]

I say this all the time!! We have the knowledge and are not using it. That though has terrifying prospects and is BEYOND depressing.

[@NeonCicada]

"A child not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth"

[@siyaindagulag.]

Many , many thanks. The more light on those the better.

[@privateprivate8366]

I feel sad to say that, if narcissism undoes the human race - let it. Because we foster it in every way possible.

[@charleshuguley9903]

We may have to accept the fact that we have failed, as a species, to successfully overcome the challenges to our continued existence and that our time has come. Whether it's our failure to address climate change or to reign in the terrible weapons of mass destruction we've created or to overcome a final pandemic, it seems likely that something will eradicate us.

[@privateprivate8366]

@@charleshuguley9903 agreed. I have become painfully aware of some of our deficits and I don’t think an upward trajectory is entirely clear, at this point and I’m not fooled my advances in technology.

[@runawaylady1833]

Wow!! This is so inspiring...., subscribed and will be binged. Thanks.