XFM The Ricky Gervais Show Series 3 Episode 1 - Every boy's fantasy

The Ricky Gervais Show Broadcast 1st November 2003.
Thanks for all your support, it's a privilege to be able to document these shows for other like-minded people to enjoy.
Series 1 is here... • All Of Series 1 The Ri...
Series 2 is here... • All Of Series 2 The Ri...
Series 3 is here... • All Of Series 3 The Ri...
Series 4 is here... • All Of Series 4 The Ri...
Rarities, Specials & Compilations are here... • Rarities, Specials & C...

[@julienguieu5636]

"Talk, then, someone should talk!" has to be the best first words ever spoken at the start of a radio show ever.

[@AutomaticDuck300]

Self aware humour is the best humour

[@TheManorBeast]

'Already a shambles' 'What you doin' 'What...(silence) Well the record was ending no one was saying anythi...well I might shoot off'

[@aaronflair]

Face the

[@sf1762]

Jv

[@joelynch1172]

0000

[@peebs7753]

Who else is still listening to these? :D Oct 2019

[@mscloud9x369]

Fairly new me, since Dec 2015 :0

[@themanwnoname3454]

Peebs7 2019 “Respect and dignity.” Furthermore: (“Respect and dignity!”)

[@djpsso3228]

what kind of a cunt isnt

[@Martin-zm8tg]

I´ve been having them as background sound (when working) since 2008. :D

[@d4don]

Yep.

[@theholmyg]

I love the way almost without fail that someone says that each episode is their favourite. Shows the high level of quality of each episode.

[@gustavkrogsbygaard3254]

no one has the hamburger one as their favorite

[@blankpool]

​@@gustavkrogsbygaard3254 lol is that verified?

[@adamweishaupt2846]

@@gustavkrogsbygaard3254 Or any with Sturgess (except the part where they blackmail Karl into calling in)

[@MR_BIANCONERO]

Like a packet of good quality cookies

[@adamspain9324]

@@adamweishaupt2846Naaat true babbbeeeeh. Just made it uppp!

[@alandodd3184]

I wish I could experience that feeling again of listening to these for the first time....the anticipation, the laughter and the brilliance.

[@Scallion_D]

I'm going through this now. 😍 Amazing show.

[@sneezydeezymcdeluxe7015]

I agree with you but I honestly feel like they get better with each listen too.

[@TheClassicWorld]

Grippage, croppage, foodage, webbage, blokage, sluggage; frightenedness, Egypt bloke, Baba, binable, Boswell, brain case, clippable mat, diskartis, glunge, kusabi, Papa people, problem ball, gene, hole, worry hole, replemishing, squoze, willy-nillily, and uppered. These are just some words Karl likes to use, an' tha'.

[@WollongongWacko]

Cheers mate

[@Lamedvavnik]

Retro Workshop wroted and limsy

[@HaydnG266]

Tubberware.

[@thirtythree680]

Man Moth

[@McKayonaise]

'Come on Karl, you know this.' '...Aphroditee?'

[@Asidders]

Whoever owns XFM don't know what revenue they're missing with releasing this content properly. Every episode has several hundred thousand hits.

[@reaverbowerstone4596]

XFM was shut down. Now Radio X

[@supremebuffalo6322]

The point still stands, the rights will have transferred.

[@rhysharper8779]

shhhhhh lol

[@toriallnutt]

Too real...Glad i'm not the only one!

[@dukeofpreston3228]

Every night......me too! 😵

[@Dickie2shoes]

I love how Karl's happiness scale fluctuates throughout the show.

[@GooglyEyedJoe]

Ricky doesn't exactly help matters by banging on about Monday's every 5 minutes constantly.

[@ManForToday]

@@GooglyEyedJoe Rightly so though. Who did Karl thing he was? Blatantly manipulating them all selfishly. Ricky was right. Work hard, give back, don't just take.

[@DovahFett]

@@ManForToday Take take take... destroyed a man.

[@ManForToday]

@@DovahFett conning the management babehhh

[@josephiscancelled2732]

@@ManForToday Sending this station spiraling down, for his greed and SELFISHNESS

[@TheManorBeast]

35:56 Got the Monday aaahhf, Connnning the management baybeh, sending this radio station spiralling down into the depths with his greeeeed and SELFISHNESSSSSSS 😂😂😂😂

[@Scallion_D]

Love when Karl mutters under his breath when he's annoyed at Ricky. 😂

[@martytheno1bauer]

Still listening...since 2008! Always come back for a rerun every once in a while. Good for the soul, and the mini-community is just incredible. I wonder if they know it exists?

[@jameslynch2599]

I'd imagine Steve does anyway - everything he's ever posted online has people commenting 'eyes bulging with imagined riches' underneath.

[@HumanJarv]

Conning the management, babeh.

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

"Little whingey, baldy, Manc twat. If it's too hard I don't wanna do it. Ohhh, can I have a day off and still get paid for it?!" x

[@Michele1ELL]

"Karl pilkington...take take take....destroyed a man..."

[@Nickknackks]

+Michele Neri that's my favourite bit too haha

[@Asidders]

Oover to you, Steeve

[@TheClassicWorld]

Karl, whether it's a nut or a potato it's a foodage, Pilkington.

[@Livikyu]

The legendary Suzanne's haircut episode!

[@indecentproposal9473]

she's sittin at home with a wooly hat on

[@BoManton]

🙌

[@33hegemon]

9:05 you have to love the wordless scrunching up of the newspaper as Ricky nearly explodes

[@turnipgirl11]

I can just see him writhing around in his chair dying of laughter 😂😂

[@jbri1]

Crinchling?

[@anyoldactress4078]

Ricky joked that there were maybe 450 people listening. I’ve done some rudimentary (and conservative) calculations and I believe there are on average around 500-600 people listening to one of their XFM shows at any given moment … 20 YEARS LATER!!!! I hope they are aware of the ongoing impact of these shows. It’s incredible.

[@oremstale8558]

i think there were much more listening live, thousands

[@stevenlannister184]

So Ricky was right, he was just talking to us? The first time travelling radio show.

[@user-zm4yk1et6g]

i wonder when listening if any of them know how popular these still are. Also weird because this show was pretty much the first podcast as far as I’m aware

[@anyoldactress4078]

@@user-zm4yk1et6g I’d love to hear them interviewed about this. I’m terms of what Ricky’s most lasting legacy will be, it’ll probably be The Office but I could make a good argument for the XFM shows’ enduring appeal.

[@MitchellfcNa32]

XFM had a weekly listenership of over 600,000 at the time of this series, so I’d say they’d be bringing in at least 10,000 live listeners

[@adamfelts5355]

Ricky: where are you on the happiness scale now? Karl: ...I'm at about a 3. Ricky: laughs maniacally.

[@mrdex8527]

love that part 😂

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

I'm 'appy when I'm not fed up. x

[@Lamedvavnik]

Manically

[@bigfatpieface]

@@Lamedvavnik definitely maniacally

[@SundayCovers666]

"I DON'T LIKE INJUSTICE.. I TRY TO STAMP IT OUT WHENEVER I CAN" *crying*

[@themanwnoname3454]

Kimberley-Tybee Golding-Tomter 2019 “Respect and dignity.” Furthermore: (“Respect and dignity!”) • “Respect and dignity, 2019?”

[@8evvied]

In the mist of Coronavirus this is keeping me sane

[@romeowhiskey2759]

Me too. These three always make me laugh, without fail. It's midst, not mist. Just a friendly correction. Stay safe brother!

[@danquinton1345]

Agreed..just didn't think I'd be doing exactly the same 10 months later! 😅

[@8evvied]

@@danquinton1345 So true

[@jpg1061]

Mate same

[@alexenglush7027]

It’s been a year now. Still sane?

[@JamesMorganMcGill1960]

the squozen one

[@Dozzyx]

18:46 - Karl "The User" Pilkington. Takes takes takes, destroyed a man. Over to you Steveeee.

[@Ranger1812]

*Steeeve

[@DonRoyalX]

“Destroyed a man” kills me every time hahaha

[@TomFry]

That woman. She's bought some blinds.

[@alandodd7195]

Man moth. You are a hero. Is this the one where they rip Karl for two hours for having Monday's off? Three months to prepare....what's happened in the last three months? Updated rock busters. Genius.

[@Crimson34533]

21:29 steve's advice for people who work in club toilets is brilliant

[@indecentproposal9473]

holy hell. finally googled Dave Hill of Slade... poor Susan

[@jackwredwood]

Years on, and still watching these videos. Man Moth you are a legend!

[@rthomas201011]

Just want to thank you for cutting nickleback out. Its much appreciated.

[@tomrodwell9911]

Like a kid dressed up like a lion

[@BaldMancTwat]

Nickelback is good.

[@jameshoffa7085]

All the songs are cut out you dumbass

[@brunes23]

"You're a little bald manc with your mouth open.." - genius

[@yukiomishima33]

I unpaused this and the first thing I heard steve say to karl was, 'Weasel. You're a weasel' lol

[@simonmaxwellstewart]

I always thought that Karl's theory about Asians not aging well came about because they DO age so well: the people he thinks are young Asians are often actually in their thirties, and the ones he thinks are super-old...are super-old. If he actually went and asked their ages, his theory would turn right around.

[@d4don]

I’ve always thought the same thing 👍

[@Asidders]

You're totally right and that's what I believe as well. I've watched so many K-dramas where they portray 18-20-year-olds and they turn out to be 30 🤯

[@AA-hg5fk]

Agree, I know a Chinese fella who turned 50 this year, I was surprised as I thought he looked about 40.

[@Wagoo]

Absolutely right, I teach quantum physics to a 7 year old Japanese girl, but she only looks about 3

[@stfnkblm6738]

"Life is a bit of a chore for Karl" I feel the same way.

[@Positronicman]

Welcome to the fun comments

[@AA-hg5fk]

That was the point of his show 'Sick of it'! I also agree with you and Karl, my life consists of going to work full time to pay rent, bills and council tax. I don't earn enough to save more than £100 a month. So effectively I work full-time for £100 a month.

[@MinaF99]

I'm 'appy when im not fed up, miss

[@gibsondanny]

Well done, Good boy!!!

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

Mina F ‘Psychology of the Mind’ by Karl Pilkington. x

[@user-dh1yq5cz9v]

30:55

[@dickyanders8138]

Steve sounds so mean at 31:55 haha

[@nefariousnilbog]

I thought that too, he sounds like he's dripping with hate lol

[@JSCwrd]

Who's sending you letters no one!

[@MrNottyNotty]

Shed Seven re-united, thank God

[@StillSoapy]

YOU ARE JOKING.

[@Stevo985]

+StillSoapy lovely comedy :D

[@MrMongoose221]

Honestly sometimes I don't know if I feel sorry for Karl but also can't stop laughing. This was definitely one of those episodes with a bit more of a tense atmosphere.

[@undercoverbrother67]

"Hello to Aiden who's phoned in to let us know he's actually listening in Northern Ireland. So we've gone international". Ricky 'The Rebel' Gervais 😂😂😂 Tiocfaidh ar la!

[@Ligerpride]

This one is outstanding.

[@Billy-fr5oo]

This is my favourite XFM episode, it has everything.

[@lesleyb13]

I'd a weird dream that I bumped into Ricky outside after one of his comedy gigs and had a long conversation about these episodes on KZbin and how they were a lifesaver to so many of us 😂😂😂😂

[@MLGAZZORIOUS]

so used to being subscribed to toby I didn't realize I hadn't yet subbed to you thanks for the upload my days would be awful without you

[@ManMoth]

MLGAZZORIOUS You're welcome!

[@marksutton1654]

Ccmbc

[@josephblackhall]

Who's Toby?

[@anonymuscaesar8511]

I just realized Karl and Ricky had their own features both called "That film sounds good". I don't think they ever addressed that :p

[@Scallion_D]

"Talk then, someone should talk. Already a shambles." Lol.

[@kieranflaherty3316]

Don't mind me I'm just saving my favourite moments from each episode for my next round trip 👍 😂 😂 This time it's smerch at his best, early doors 00:00

[@atheistgamer9968]

Thank you Mr Moth, still listening.

[@capnhawkins]

41:06 Karl mumbles "shut up"

[@blairmettam7642]

I go to sleep every night listening to you boys! Luv ya, Ricky

[@jimmystooge]

53:55 "you don't see me, whingeing" says Steve, after about five minutes of whingeing.

[@seanbrown8533]

Every bloody day i listen to these 3!😂 So addictive even after the millionth time of hearing them. The dynamic between them is perfect. SMerch so underrated, he's the glue. Funny stuff.

[@grandnotbrand]

Business was never the same after the Pilkingtons moved away. Sales of bread and potatoes went through the floor.

[@turnipgirl11]

I think this might be close to my favourite episode...The silent laughter and crumpling of the newspaper.....Haven't laughed that hard in so long

[@louisasmiles]

I forget the name but that guessing the film or song comp with those horrifying sounds was nightmarish and I'm glad it never lasted.

[@finksinatra1575]

It’s the greatest podcast ever. Especially new stuff.

[@Adelehalsall]

I think these episodes need an appendix where documents/links relating to the show can be viewed. Prime example: the picture of the 48 year old woman because I’m curious to see 😂😂

[@frankieaglow]

I love it when Smerch goes mental at 31:56

[@GooglyEyedJoe]

It's like his spite just bursts to the surface for a few seconds then he manages to control it again xD

[@jenanahulu]

Yep, I was like whoaaaaa steve, gear down big shifter

[@TheManorBeast]

‘You’ve openly declared you dont want friends’😂

[@AlexRasengan1337]

I like it because it shows Stephen's hypocrisy

[@DovahFett]

@@AlexRasengan1337 I don't think so. I think it shows that even Steve can only put up with Karl's BS and quite frankly, bullying, for so long before genuinely getting pissed. Like the time he punched Karl in the arm live on air after he made another out of the blue joke about his looks. I sometimes see people complaining about the way Ricky treated Karl, but few discuss how Karl treated Steve. He went after Steve all the time with insults, and unlike the ones that Ricky might say to him, Karl's were absolutely mean spirited. Things like "when you're older are you worried that you *will* be on your own?". If anyone was a bully on this show, it was Karl, and Steve put up with it for far too long.

[@JustinKlineTheComedian]

I've been listening for a good seven years on repeat, and as of maybe the last couple go-throughs, I'm finding series 3- one I never cared for- to be my new favorite. Series 1 is so amazing, series 2 has all the hits, but in season 3, there are moments in each episode I look for. The entire season I can't wait to hear this episode's beginning of Suzanne's haircut, knowing that fat arse is coming up next, then him getting in trouble, leading to When Harry Met Barry. "I'm happy when I'm not fed up" is a great one from this episode. Camfield later on. The saga of Karl getting Mondays off, and never not getting shit for it. More of a through-line here, and amazing throwaway moments I love.

[@esinsaribudak1125]

These are my favorite. Thank you for uploading these and organizing them into playlists. I also love the brief descriptive phrases you've added to the titles -- makes it so much easier to find my favorite bits!

[@Matt-hg9be]

Thank you Man Moth. I had gone through all of the episodes of the animated version on HBO whilst this treasure trove was already on here. Cheers m8te !

[@jpg1061]

And 5 years later I’m still binging this shit

[@isascower7247]

Crazy how many hundred of thousands of people listen to these podcasts to help them sleep 🙃

[@ratman1]

The music they played was a really good mix. ‘Further’ by Longview is always a nice one.

[@VerifiedFiveIron]

I concur, girl-name.

[@DrWonkenstein]

Thank you so much for uploading these

[@mckill85]

Thanks for uploading all of these. listen to them walking to work....puts a huge smile on my face :)

[@williamgustafson9109]

Thank you so much for this! Love you!

[@hansrockhard]

Thanks for the upload, friend! These guys are too perfect.

[@ManMoth]

You're very welcome!

[@alekaidon1364]

It’s a shame that you can hear Karl getting unhappier each series and Ricky getting harsher

[@rahuldahoob4513]

And now they never talk!!

[@tomneil3334]

They went on to make about 50 podcasts and 4 tv shows together following this 😅 think they were fine…

[@DovahFett]

@@tomneil3334 And Karl's on record as saying that he enjoyed doing the podcasts. He did not enjoy doing the radio show as much because Ricky and Steve could have done something stupid and gotten him fire, whereas that was not a worry while making the podcast.

[@BogWomble]

Tbf, Ricky's harshness is often warranted.

[@danielbetancourt1483]

​@@BogWomble More often not

[@iparkthebus2902]

This is the best xfm episode

[@jameskenge]

Getting me through lockdown 😂😂😂 so glad they came back

[@TomMaddox888]

YOU ARE JOKING?!

[@tomrodwell9911]

Shed seven have split up

[@a_b897]

Good balance of tension and good natured chat in this one!

[@louiefelipemurphy]

probably my favorite first 5 minutes of any episode in series 3.

[@alandodd3184]

I love the ones that are all full of tension too. I know that deep down though that the respect and love they have for each other is real and so the tension is mostly for the show.

[@kitpalmer1583]

the noise Steve makes when he hears Shed 7 split up is incredible

[@samedz3966]

18:39 - Karl "the user" Pilkington

[@julianblower6330]

"I'm 'appy when I'm not fed up" "Is this in your new book, Psychology of the Mind?" 😂😂

[@nayf7682]

I love the way Ricky says about Karls "greed and selfishness!" that delivery cracks me up every time.

[@Wearenotwell]

Love the way Ricky ends this lol

[@gillymac9363]

"I don't like injustice in the world - I fight it where I can." 😄

[@jackspence3178]

She looks like the drummer of Iron Maiden! She looks like Lemmy! Hahahahaha

[@a_b897]

Third time around and I still can never guess/remember "Gladiator", how did people get that??

[@KubbsWickedSoul]

I was just thinking the same thing! Way more difficult than Rockbusters, and that's saying something. That one was mental.

[@a_b897]

5/6th time around (lost proper track) and once again I forgot and had no idea what the answer was

[@jameslynch2599]

I can never understand why Ricky is genuinely so resentful of Karl getting Monday off. Why does he care about it so much? Especially as Ricky himself boasts about never having had a real 'job' and how he gets up whenever he wants etc.

[@ImMouldyJim]

This is my least favourite episode, Ricky is so annoying. It's their first show back and he's not remotely bothered about trying to entertain the listeners, he just comes across as a bratty kid

[@arstulex]

Ricky brings up multiple times throughout the XFM shows about how he has X amount of jobs and Karl only has one, or how he's always working and never takes time off. He doesn't understand that there's a world of difference between 'working' as a self employed celebrity who has enough money that they are only really working by choice, and working for a company for a wage because you _need_ to in order to pay bills and survive. The latter is always going to be more draining and exhausting than the former, even if the actual time spent working is less. Ricky portrays himself as somebody with an amazing work ethic when the reality of it is he basically got lucky and rode that gravy train to success. He's never experienced what actual work is like. It's not so much that he's 'out of touch' as much as it is that he was never truly 'in touch' to begin with.

[@rahuldahoob4513]

@@arstulex all correct apart from your last sentence

[@DovahFett]

@@arstulex Ricky did "real" work for almost 40 years before he and Steve made The Office. He's said many times that his experiences of working in an office for almost a decade are what informed his writing of the show. What in God's name are you talking about? Could you not be bothered even learning about the man before writing his life off?

[@shrisiva4016]

​​​​@@DovahFettRicky was also on the dole for years what are you on about? How are you having a go for others for not knowing about Ricky when you didn't know this well known fact. At least Karl was working for all of his adult life

[@ashleyscoble9023]

i need some sort of head injury where i forget all the shows so i can watch them again for the first time

[@darylchristie3809]

Still stick this on on the regular 😂

[@studkickass513]

COVID-19 re-listen!

[@JohnH-ld6mt]

best episode

[@MonkeyMelissa3]

The "every boys fantasy" woman has Twitter @lanaallenx

[@YourOwnDa]

Jesus Christ that's a great find

[@markwilliams7054]

good god! She still looks like the drummer from Iron Maiden

[@Sheriff_GrimLaw]

Hahahaha! Christ, she's rough. x

[@kevinflemming5928]

Jesus titty-fucking Christ. I'm going to have nightmares tonight lol.

[@supremebuffalo6322]

Her tweets are hilarious too. For all the wrong reasons obviously.

[@phil8528]

“Looks like the drummer of Iron Maiden” 😂

[@bobbyaxelrod5959]

It’s mad how Karl cannot fathom people being out still at 1am.

[@enthrallingusername]

I'm appy when I'm not fed up.

[@hankochai]

I just looked up the picture of Lana Allen. Exceeded expectations.

[@S4RGE007]

listening to this is a solid 10

[@Kate-go9tp]

Starting season 3 for the second time!

[@blackfoot332]

All 3 of his audio collage clues have been terrifying

[@jongil6379]

Ricky at 29.10 😂😂😂 "Look at his face Play a record You're an idiot"

[@andrewhadden133]

I extra like this one lol

[@cailynpeddle]

POTATOES! Boil ‘em, mash ‘em, stick ‘em in a stew!

[@enthrallingusername]

48:30 "Little weed. We should have both turned on them". Cracks me up.

[@ChipWhitingtonIII]

"Destroyed a man!"

[@HEEM_SLEEPY]

The knob News this episode starting at 37:40 is hilarious 😂 Ricky was really winding him up this episode

[@grease_monkey6078]

everytime I return , when they start to play a song I have to search and play it before I continue. Weird innit

[@Wagoo]

Man alive! That must be a nightmare during Hip Hop "Hooray"

[@CallumLfc]

'Hope e didn't do it on a Tuesday tho' coz that's cutttinnn'innn to preciouss timee'

[@mafianoodles]

hi folks - i used to listen to this decades ago. my mrs stole my savings and sold my car. kind of funny but it's not. i've come back to this for therapy. wishing everyone well.

[@adamweishaupt2846]

ohhhh she's done ya!

[@josephconnolly6276]

42:35 that laugh from Steve my God