Mark Manson - The Self-Help Industry Is Lying

[@rohanbsharma]

Hey, I know you might be getting some hate right now, but I personally think you’re on the right track. I’ve loved Mark Manson’s brutal honesty for years, and it’s easy for some people to feel it’s a little TOO brutal in the beginning. Props to you- you’re taking action on a problem you see. Keep it up. That courage alone is more motivating than any 15-minute video could be. :)

[@Motivationgrid]

Glad you appreciate it!

[@damnmayneunfiltered]

MotivationGrid You're waking up. I recently woke up and did a mass filtering of "positive thinkers" and replaced them with "knuckle draggers".

[@factsverse9957]

Well this video is probably about the teaser for "The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck" by Mark Manson.

[@javierbonadeo4569]

same here. First time I read his second book I hated it, cause it was the opposite of all I have read before. Then I realized he was right cause there are a lot of painful but helpful truths

[@LukaDonesnitch]

I think he's getting hate because some of the people see the message, you just have to learn to love the struggle and are like, okay? That's it. What if I can't love the struggle then what? It's like the advice is not really useful to these people. Might as well call it a motivation video. Those videos suck, and they go on and on to say nothing of substance, just get you hyped up or appeal to your hopes for a little longer, just so they can keep cranking out this useless content and make ad revenue.

[@ChessMasteryOfficial]

*Happiness is not the absence of problems; it's the ability to deal with them...*

[@Ray-qt1oy]

I Like this that you said,it's a Powerful statement 🙏👍

[@brazenserpent7]

You wrote this same comment on one of The School of Life's videos. Interesting!

[@Jaidzeka36]

I've been looking for a quote to go by for years...this just might be it.

[@JaysonT1]

@@Jaidzeka36 "expression, not impression". That's a good one too.

[@Jaidzeka36]

Personally, I disagree. I believe life is like the tango. But that's just me

[@manavsingh7378]

Self help industry is like a treadmill... It gives you a lot of exercise and illusion of moving forward; but doesn't really take you anywhere.

[@mjennifer142]

That’s true. So true.

[@johnrobert2572]

*but you get stronger on a treadmill

[@TheLifeFormulaa]

Totally agree that is an issue. Sometimes as a consumer, you get so caught up in learning the information that you dont even apply it

[@ezekiel4481]

This is so damn true yo

[@ForwardEarth]

The ignorance behind the claim that you can't change yourself would be laughable if the statement weren't so harmful. As another commenter pointed out, neuroplasticity enables us to make dramatic changes in our brains. A couple of years ago, I was suicidally depressed. I was afraid of everything, full of anger, and I believed myself to be helpless and incapable of improving my own life. But I did have a breakthrough, one that taught me that I have the power to control how I feel, who I am and how I handle challenges and hardships. Now I'm happy by default and nothing intimidates me. All it took was learning a handful of concepts and experiencing the truth behind them. I haven't been magically transformed into a huge success, but I have certainly become someone who is capable of becoming one by putting in the effort and never doubting my potential. I have absolutely changed myself. The filth you're peddling is designed to cater to those who have struggled to take control of their lives and want to feel better about failing, because they haven't found the answers, and giving up is so much easier than searching. And that's exactly whom you're attracting. You can tell by the vicious way that some of them are attacking those who disagree. People who are content don't lash out at others just for seeing things differently. Happiness demands to be shared. It takes misery to be cruel.

[@ForwardEarth]

Matthew Neill You have no idea what you’re parroting. I absolutely orchestrated my own breakthrough. There is no can’t, and philosophy is irrelevant to psychology. Yes, you have to get out of your own way, meaning to stop letting your subconscious have free reign over your emotions and intentions and take charge of those things consciously. That’s the breakthrough.

[@opheosmedia7809]

Well, those who made the pearl were probably incapable of self improvements, and they decided to take a revenge. Some of us can change their minds and lives, others can't. Genetics defines it all. The video actually encouraged me to watch a couple of self-help videos.

[@hypnotechno]

a lot of what you say makes sense, and you should be saluted. But this bit: "Now I'm happy by default and nothing intimidates me." you are not suggesting you are happy all the time are you?

[@voornaamachternaam8755]

I agree...what the fuck does this fucker know about someone else?and at the end he's saying the same as selfhelp books....and whats with the horrible music anyway....dramatic shit ...he is as bad as any selfhelp person he tries to put down...yes there are a lot of selfhelp liars and bullshit but there is also good self help material out there...even science speaks of neuro networks and how they can be altered by the way you think....he talks about problems and self help people talk about challenges....the only difference here is that problems are negative and challenges are positive...but they still.are the samw thing....fuck him he is just a negative twat

[@theden1400]

@@ForwardEarth how old are you ? Life can throw you curves anytime and you can have to restart you life again and again... When he said you cannot change, what I did understand is how those gurus are selling you easy breakthrough out of nothing, effortless, etc. It doesn't means it never happen to anyone to change, but it is not the free deal for everybody and especially not with a One Size Fit All system.

[@polinaa5896]

It's not the fault of self help authors or the industry itself, why do we always shfit blame? Everything you do is your choice. If you believe only watching videos all day and meditating can somehow make your dreams come true, well it is your decision. When you don't see results... Blame yourself. I didn't see any prolific author who didn't talk about the working part, the implementation part. So don't shfit blame, take full responsibility and deal with it.

[@0rocker1]

The way he presented the video is nothing short of a sales pitch, he just wanted to get that shock factor in and succedeed in my opinion

[@pavelmartinez4617]

Yup @@0rocker1

[@pavelmartinez4617]

If you focused in this, you 100% missed the real purpose of the video.

[@NoName-dd5vq]

It's pathetic how blind you are. You act as if everyone is blameless except who you are addressing to. It's predatory behavior and contributes to the excessive depression. Blaming yourself for everything helps no one, Narcissist.

[@cautarepvp2079]

@@NoName-dd5vq yes but you have to take advantage of it and improve its not about blaming, is about moving forward and try to be a better version of yourself. I mostly agree with the first comment here,

[@theDavidChannel1]

The last 4:20 says it all. We need to learn to embrace and fall in love with the struggle and the grind instead of focusing only on the prize and the glory.

[@cntrygal2007]

@David Duarte Psst! Know what? The videos that used to be on this channel said the exact same thing!!

[@Motivationgrid]

@@cntrygal2007 It used to say that you should risk everything to follow your dream, and now the message is quite different.

[@paesanellis5720]

Even that message is as deceiving as the self help industry that he criticizes. Falling in love with the struggle? What does that even mean? Does it mean we just accept that we must struggle in life without demanding better pay and working conditions so that we don’t have to be struggling all the time?

[@theDavidChannel1]

@@paesanellis5720 sounds like you're describing a regular job. I'm talking about chasing a dream. All of us have dreams, but most of don't like the work it takes to achieve those dreams. One must accept the struggle it takes to get that dream if they truly want it. A regular job is a whole other conversation.

[@damnmayneunfiltered]

5:12 "Struggles that invigorate you". If you have never been there, you wont get it. Its purposely taking the longest and hardest path to something because you know it activates a certain flow about you. It causes improvement on a micro level. You stay up 28-30 hours straight working on a problem and fail to solve it. The next day, you realize, "Hey, I can go longer now without giving up." And if you do succeed, youre not enjoying it and basking in it. Youre back to the drawing board to find the next struggle.

[@glx4909]

1 minor objection: this _is_ a self-improvement video. uh..

[@rosej5029]

What self help book says it will be easy and without struggle to achieve one's dreams? And who is encouraged by family and friends to go after their dreams? There are so many stories of innovators and goal achievers being discouraged, and made fun of by the people in their lives for chasing their dreams.

[@Hasnain1F]

I don't agree with everything. I read about 230 books and watched and read thousands of articles, videos and what not. It helped me in following ways. 1) Overcame my clinical depression, suicidal tendencies, social anxiety. 2) Despite being 20 and never have gone to college, I work as a web developer now. 3) Made me such a better and mature person. So again, don't blame all the industry. What they preach, works. Yes, some of them are just crooks and you have to be aware of them. The problem is the "self help junkie" himself, not the industry or any kind! BTW, The Subtle Art Not Giving A Fu*k one of the best I read! ❤

[@waynedonoghue4071]

Firstly, thanks for the video I'm a fan of your channel. But personally, I found it hard to see what the purpose of this video was? The key message seems to be "Success does not come from dreaming, it comes from hard work". What i saw was a video just repeatedly contradict itself throughout. Every other "Motivational, self-help video" I'v seen says pretty much the exact same thing as this video. WORK......

[@bboyfocus12]

your inability to pull the lesson.out of this might be your iq or just your lack of ethic.. but the point is to focus on the work.. not just mindlessly do the hard part.. but to become fully integrated and enjoy it.. once you enjoy the struggle you won... but until you can enjoy the struggle the ladder grows longer.. japanese and koreans are masters at this.. wen u focus on detail u become super focused on.the moment nd do ur work.greatly nd efficiently

[@dexdalador]

Yeah man, the exact same thought I had... It is just click bait "you've been lied to by the self help industry, yadi yadi yada..." the thing he mentions what self help like is not even realistic, I haven't heard anybody talking about or writing books about you just dream and one day you won't have problems (apart from the abomination called 'the secret' but we don't talk about that)

[@waynedonoghue4071]

@@bboyfocus12 the start of your comment was completely uneccesary! What an expression of pure negativity towards a fellow human being. Assuming I have a lack of ethic when you have never met me or know who I am! Poor expression of character! And I'm sorry for whatever negativity is in your mind.. because one must possess negativity of some sort in order to express it!

[@waynedonoghue4071]

@@dexdalador exactly man. This video basically starts off with "don't listen to self help videos" and then goes on to say the exact same things as every other self help video 😂😂

[@bboyfocus12]

@@waynedonoghue4071 again you missed my message,, your feelings got in the way, you and success will be distant cousins it seems

[@traceuser12]

I’m all for being open to all perspectives so I gave this video a shot. But I disagree with your point of view. Self help and motivation is not garbage, they are tools that help one discover the courage and belief in themselves to step out there comfort zone and take action. Motivation is useless only if action is not taken. But if action is taken than motivation and self help is a tremendous strategy to use to help someone. Just my opinion at least whether you agree or not. But I do respect your courage to change your channel to the complete opposite than what you use to believe

[@Motivationgrid]

I am not saying it's garbage, the way it's promoted is garbage.

[@leox3783]

@@Motivationgrid Exactly!

[@raymeester7883]

This video was kind of rubbish. You gave it a shot. That's all you can do.

[@polinaa5896]

This video was recommended to me, I'm not a subscriber. But I don't believe in blaming Any indistry. "Self help is lying", and all that... If someone thinks they can watch videos all day and meditate and then wonder why nothing happens, well... They need to blame themselves. Not one motivational speaker didn't emphasise hard work and implementation. It's the person's fault and he or she needs to take responsibility and blame themselves if nothing happens.

[@RunawayTV]

This video is itself a self help vid

[@lindseye4300]

I agree with this. As someone who’s spent the last year reading every self-help book under the sun, and watching motivational videos, and has barely moved an inch from where I was a year ago.. at the end of the day it’s about finding a love for the struggle and workload. Most of the self-help industry is geared towards motivating and inspiring which is fine, but if you continue to depend on outside motivation and inspiration instead of finding it within yourself, once that outside motivation wears off ... you’re at a standstill

[@i-am-that-what-i-am]

A whole one year? LOL

[@thirtywam]

On point

[@smallstudiodesign]

I getchya -.I liked how you said every self help book/video - at some point when do we stop all the inhalation & mind numbing overload of consumption + actually rise up and get out and do something of our own?

[@walidab207]

because you spent the whole time litening or watching or reading but at no moment you acted,,,,and that s why you still at one place ,,,what were you expecting???

[@abdallajbara6242]

when a man uses his acid trip as a metaphor in his book and says 0 fucks given, that's when you know you can trust his insights on anything he wants to talk about, and that is for 2 reasons, 1 being the obvious; he speaks his mind straight up, and 2 the man is awake. So, yes I'm setting a reminder for this I'd like to hear what he has to say, even though I have an idea about the subject but for sure I'm down to make them clearer. Preach!!

[@Motivationgrid]

Abdalla - I think that he is one of few people in the self-help industry that doesn't sell you bullshit. I actually respect him a lot, even though I have followed him for a while, I couldn't understand his message because after all I was one of the biggest self-help believers.

[@georgiatechur]

For years I've said that everyone is so hard chasing the BIG happy that they don't pay attention to all the little happys that make the BIG happy.

[@cathartic1102]

You put it so well🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@PracticalInspiration]

*Self help is like exercise. If you watch and fail to take action, you never lose the gut and will never improve yourself. Likewise, if you only pursue results and not enjoy the journey, it's hard to get pleasure in life. Embrace the struggle, and take pleasure in overcoming it*

[@Motivationgrid]

I 100% believe that it's better to spend an hour working on whatever you want to get better, than it is to read a self-help book.

[@CJ0101]

Obviously you don't overcome it; otherwise you wouldn't have to embrace it.

[@CJ0101]

@@Motivationgrid Even if you want to get better at reading self-help books?

[@meowbhai209]

Of course, you can change yourself. You didn't sleep at 5 am and wake up at 12 pm when you were a child. You did that to yourself. Thing is becoming lazy is easy but getting back on track us hard.

[@atlantabaruah]

I was stuck in the pits of the Feedback Loop from Hell as described by Manson and I couldn't even identify it until I read his book. My point is, he gave me a reality slap when I most needed it and yeah, subscribed.

[@RunawayTV]

A motivational video talking about why other motivational videos suck ! Im in a loophole 👌

I don't think all motivational videos tell us to chase unrealistic dreams.they tell us to go after what we truly desire, and to not give up when confronted by failures. You have said the same thing. And the thing about not being able to change oneself is bull because we learn and grow as a person everyday.

[@zeea6507]

People getting touchy because it’s the truth get out of your feelings and let’s take some massive action this 2019.

[@CARNA6E]

Great! Now forward to the next motivations/success/self-development video

[@GroundbreakGames]

This is over generalized and stereotyped beyond belief. I've never listened to a single self help person who made people feel entitled or they deserve it without work. Then you go on to say that everyone who gets self help is a addict of self help.. according to who? According to what data? So 1. You make a huge generalization about what self help is, then base an assumption about the people who utilize self help, based on your generalization. This video was 100% worthless. I use self help speakers like Gary Vee to push me while I've been working 15 hours straight on my side hustle making my dreams come true. He promotes struggle, hard work, the things you claim we need, yet hes a self help speaker, so... are you wrong or just overgeneralizing to make it seem like you are smarter than anyone who uses self help...

[@ZephyrusBlue]

Groundbreak Games for real, for me it’s been a lot of CharsimaOnCommand and various Jordan Peterson videos and NEITHER of these make it seem like it’s going to be easy, not even for a second. Idk wtf is going on with this video because (luckily for me) the things I’ve watched/stumbled upon haven’t given me some bullshit fluff; they flat out make it apparent that you MUST PUT IN THE WORK to see any sort of results. You must take what you learn and put it into action in order to really see any change and start actually improving. The overgeneralizing here is definitely real.

[@marksoberay2318]

Agree this video is terrible

[@LeydiMorales]

I actually did get addicted to personal development (specifically Law of Attraction stuff) and I honestly believe it led to my depression. I used self help as a coping mechanism to avoid feeling shitty about my life, myself and my problems and I believed that this one person who was talking about THEIR OWN experience was going to lead me through my breakthough and I would finally be able to achieve my dreams. At the end of the day, I actually had all the answers and realized there is no one size fits all. What worked for them may or may not (a lot of times did not) work for me and that is fine. Once I started actually focusing on my skills and mastering them and trusting myself was when i actually started making progress. I also think a lot of what he is talking or referring to is the Law of Attraction niche which I can talk all day about how "thinking positive and visualzing that your million-dollar check is coming in your mailbox if you just feel and believe it is" is overrated and B.S...I do believe in the LOA, but not how the mainstream "teaches" it.

[@seantan552]

This video message makes no sense, either what he’s saying is stupid or this channel edited good advice poorly and made it stupid

[@cntrygal2007]

@Sean Tan @Sean Tan THANK YOU!! I thought I was the only one who feels this twit and video is ludicrous! What he's saying makes no sense, PERIOD! If you still have a functioning brain, you'd realize what this twit is saying is what the other videos on this same channel were saying!! Only *MUCH* more positive!! As I've stated above: Must be lots of $$$ involved for this channel to change gears like this and become so dark and negative. MotivationGrid. Yeah. Right. Not anymore. This channel says self-help is bullhockey. Yet they push someone who is listed as a self-help guru. Makes one scratch their head and say: "HUH?!?!"

[@Motivationgrid]

​@@cntrygal2007 I will just ask you one question? Why do you think negativity is a bad emotion?

[@cntrygal2007]

@@Motivationgrid Hey. If you love wallowing in negativity and don't see anything wrong with it, you be you, boo. By the way, you say $$$ isn't involved or you would've continued the old videos. You do realize how asinine that sounds, right? Think about it.

[@321Ramjet]

@@Motivationgrid best reply ever. Missed it he did. Great question. The troll failed to actually understand the question entirely and missed out. You got me to subscribe, thanks 😁

[@raymeester7883]

Sean Tan You are not wrong.

[@meanwhileinespoo1265]

I have been stuck on IT for 25 years.. only realised 2 days ago that I NEEDED to stop.... I feel relieved and free now... they really get you caught up in it and keep you dreaming... come down to earth, feel your feet on the ground again.... get out of your head and into your body.... be human, NOT spiritual..

[@makenithappen]

The danger with being in love with the struggle is that you're always looking for pain and struggle. You have to have balance. Don't be afraid to struggle but don't be so attached that you create it.

[@LD_Paradox]

Not here to changed myself but grow as who I am

[@thehumanitudeperfectingthe1777]

It's a great tragedy individually and collectively to die without an understanding that is clear and defined of what you just lived "!!

[@theteknologist9574]

Sometimes the person speaking is selling products, others might be sharing wisdom. Some actually do both. I think the point is we all want good feelings, and to be motivated. We cannot let an addiction to needing to feel motivated substitute for the long, often times tedious drudgery that it takes to make real change.

[@Zippyconvon]

Hm, I'm sitting on the fence about this one. On one hand, hearing the phrase you can't change yourself so don't even try reminds me a lot about what I said to myself when I suffered from clinical depression and anxiety. I firmly believe you can change, but in things like social skills etc. Nothing massive, but small things that help you through life a little bit. But I also believe that you shouldn't put all your eggs into one basket, don't dump your money into something risky. I think people should improve on what truly makes them happy. Writing a book is hard work but I enjoy that work. It makes me happy. But I'm not gonna put all my bets on being successful on my first book. I appreciate honesty. I appreciate staying humble about your potential and dreams. But I think the most important thing to remember is to not find too much enjoyment in the brutality. For me personally, self help videos give me a push to keep going, it didn't get me there, it probably won't get me there, but they stop me from beating myself further downwards. So yeah lol, I like the honesty, not too much a fan of the brutality but maybe that's because of bad experiences with it. I'll stay tuned though and see what develops.

[@lush429]

Yup... yer right... I work in mental health and addictions... Thank you...

[@deepfriedpunkaceratops6037]

Thanks for the video my dude. Very interesting insights. My mind exploded on "self help ultimately being self-defeating." I've been chasing the dragon of the next stage in personal development for years and hardly let myself smell the roses along the way. Time to pump the brakes a little bit and let the good times roll. Peace.

[@mjennifer142]

It’s god who you really need. A lot of people lose there way when they get into the self help. They forget God so.. yeah that’s what happened to me.

[@missynie83]

Self help IS hard work and dealing with pain and struggles!! If not then you are still in the browsing fase. Which is also valid by the way.

[@amandabrisbane8716]

There is an element of narcissism in the craving for self_help. I hv been trying to alter my attitude for 40 yrs and I found myself BACK inside the same emotional hole I was in then. The one thing I hv found though is this - ENJOY every moment- cos that’s all there is. Struggles build us. Enjoy the struggles. Yes. I hv been thinking this a lot of late.

[@ImpactMotivation]

Great Job MotivationGrid, love Mark Manson he's awesome and his books are great, Thanks!

[@luizmelo8611]

Thanks, this video gave me a reason to unsubscribe. :)

[@Motivationgrid]

Glad that this video made you take some action! Good luck brother!

[@vision3691]

I have read a book about confidence. I was not confident before I read it. It showed me how to be confident. I am 19 and when I'm around people, everyone ask me about my age. The reason they always ask becasue I look young but talk like a 30 years old guy. So I tell them to guess my age. The usual answer is 24. Eventually I tell them I'm 19 with a big surprise on their face. I ask them why are you surprised? They usually answer "you have all this confidence and very smart guy"... well, I'm proud to hear that. The thing is, I never saw that big surprise on their faces before I read that book and done the things it told me to do. Slef-help books are great. It helped me a lot of coming out from dark places like being lazy and not taking actions. So what's the point of this video again?

[@rosej5029]

Many self help books do say that it takes work and devote chapters to the different steps needed to achieve the goal. Jim Rohn, Respected Personal Development Speaker, and author of many self help books is quoted as saying (to paraphrase him) don't get caught up in the smoke mirrors of someone who says you can have the reward without putting in the work.

[@mndbd]

i thought this was a self help channel

[@ajeetalbert91]

This is the real help anyone can get... Face it!

[@Motivationgrid]

Actually, it won't be anymore. From now on it will be a not self-help channel. I will still keep the old videos because I really used to believe in them, but I will try my best to create videos based on science and not mumbo jumbo from now on. It's time to change this rotting industry. The fact is that the majority of self-help information out there is either a placebo at best or complete bunk at worst. I know that most people won't enjoy this change, but I want to do work that I believe in and I don't believe in the self-help industry anymore. I've been in it for 5 years, and most of the people in it, just want to sell you their "life-changing" product. And that's complete bullocks. So no more bullshit like - the law of attraction, the secret, the power of positive thinking and things like that.

[@Ian-hn8ty]

​@@Motivationgrid what really? the point of self help books or videos helps me because i have a negative mindset. i dont have anyone around me to teach me that so these really helps me. Once you got the positive mindset more permanently, anything becomes possible. Its your problem if you feel people are doing incorrectly with their positive mindset? Obviously if you feel that, means you are not learning anything....mindset is everything man..thats why many have mental problem. Once you have the mindset, even you dont have success, you can live very peacefully in your mind. Its like benefiting from it already and then start complaining about it cause it doesnt work? Its better for people to FOMO than drift through their life man. Whats wrong with that?

[@Motivationgrid]

@@Ian-hn8ty Actually you're completely wrong. It's completely fine to be negative, and mindset is not everything. That's what the self-help industry is telling you. Being negative is part of being human. The thing is self-help is not scientifically validated and "gurus" just want to sell you their life-changing product. It's not a beautiful industry. So, no, the mindset is not everything.

[@cntrygal2007]

@@Motivationgrid Funny how you say: " most of the people in it, just want to sell you their "life-changing" product. And that's complete bullocks. " Yet here you are, pushing this twit's 'life changing' product (his book). If this channel is no longer what it was, then I will unsubscribe from your channel and tell others to do the same: unsubscribe or don't do it to begin with. This channel was *AMAZING* and truly helped me with my negative mindset. After reading over your comments and responses, this channel has changed....and not for the better. Must be lots of money involved to suddenly switch gears like this out of nowhere. Need to change the name of your channel then. Instead of MotivatioGrid it should be called PushingTheDarkSideInsteadOfMotivatingPeople. This guy you're pushing surely has the right last name!

[@octane2344]

Yes. Embrace the struggle. Celebrate the challenge. Yes, your core desire/need isn't going to change. Yes, there's an addictive element to self-help products. However, he didn't acknowledge the idea that your heart-inspired purpose or mission is connected to the community's needs and desires. Your mission is directly connected to inspire others when everything clicks together.

[@riyashigwan9892]

Thank you Mark. Really. I am going to be grateful.

[@vmm5163]

Uncertainties, struggle and chasing dreams only occur in youth, by middle age you suddenly understand someone out there has been dictating a false dichotomy merely as a means to fill *their* own coffers. In old age all the answers are clearly laid bare, but the young have no interest in older people or their experiences, so the meaning of life and the future struggles will go on and on with no resolve. Until they themselves reach middle age and then it's, "Ah. I see now. Why have I put myself through so much, and looking for the answers in the wrong places."

[@shivangi3030]

Thanks I really needed to hear this

[@charleshurstreinvention3959]

The problem with the self help industry is that too many people believe that simple participation will fix their lives. IE "I read a Tony Robbins book and all will improve." Robbins gives excellent advice at times. And I'm sure that if one had thousands of dollars to throw away his seminars would be a positive experience. But the root of self help as I tell my own subscribers is this. Self. Most intuitively know that they have to have a positive mindset, have to have good strategy to advance and have to use massive effort. The self help gurus may be helpful in some aspects of turning your life around. Some strategical methods. But if you are spending all of your time reading book after book and chasing these gurus all the time on YT or around the country (including me) then you will never be focused on the actual advancement part. I'm only small time but this is my constant advice--take what works and discard what doesn't. You shouldn't be spending thousands of dollars when the real origin of change is in the mirror. Hope that helps someone out there--Charles.

[@dorinioanaalexandra]

Finally a video that had to be made. That’s refreshing.

[@BrickFilmerPowerlolifk]

Great video. Thing is, there are some gurus who embrace problems, facing your fears and your greatest struggles.

[@theAvaNJames]

Ultimately we have overall responsibility for our success and growth!

[@NeilMacedo]

Thank you, I think that I needed to hear this 😊

[@Mai-on6dc]

He was basically saying, "You can't change yourself if you try. So don't try. Stop trying. And instead of trying just BE." You know. So the "don't try" means, do it or don't do it. Stop hoping for yourself to change, stop thinking you can change yourself, just change yourself. I've read his books. They're offensive, but in a way that I think most of us need, contained with a lot of things we don't want to hear but we actually need.

[@dannykeiss7955]

As you can see in the comment section below, not everyone is ready to hear this specific advice, most may not even need it, ever, but for some it will help them see.

[@Ajay-ph1ei]

I do not read self-help books but I read literature. I observe people, listen to their conversation. I changed myself by self-discipline.

[@EricSmith-bx5lv]

Play 3 notes on a piano and pump out jargon. KZbin gold.

[@PutchewInnaspin]

Eric Smith shhhhhhh

[@katherinekelly6432]

It would depend on what you are trying to change Self help inspires through either the charisma of the speaker and or the infection of the group as to how an individual responds while in the presence of others. Both are powerful elixirs but there effect is temporary. Your money is spent but the returns on the money dissipate with time. A more effective form of motivation is through permanent immersionmuch like how you would learn a language. Place yourself into the environment that you want to become and this environment will create you into what it is. The environment is the potter acting on the individual as clay but the clay shapes itself into the vessel it wishes to become by choosing the potter.

[@raunakmudgal2108]

I enjoy pain, struggle, practice than so called success & failures usually

[@christianlamb]

Super inspired sir!! Lovely work!! I'm planning to put out some truth like this in the future. Keep inspiring!! Thx!!

[@RobertAfoa]

I think the message flew over my head because I didn't learn anything new

[@gregnixon1296]

My self-help was helping myself to recognize that I didn't actually want more, better, faster, etc.

[@ChotaDoctor1122]

Thank you,,I really appreciate it. Self help gives me hope to live. Life is too short do and then learn.knowledge can shorten that process of pain.

[@mikaelkristian]

Great editing!

[@Motivationgrid]

Thanks brother!

[@莊貽婷-l7g]

I was really struggling with my self-confidence. The way I changed this is through trying to convince myself that I can do everything and making small things on my personal progress. Every little change you achieve will boost your confidence. Kind of a virtuous circle! The one thing that really helped me to do so was Forwago and I am so thankful because I found about it.

[@vacaspen5038]

You will feel that you progress when you have for what what they are feeling is the anticipation of such a thing

[@abhishekaggarwal7215]

Good work

[@adsertif123]

The comment about changing yourself is actually very nuanced. It’s designed to tell you that you aren’t your habits or actions, so focusing on changing those, rather than your identity will be more productive.

[@mefisth8678]

I think what what he means by "You can't change yourself" is more like you can't change what your consciousness is, of couse you can learn new things, become stronger and etc, but your consciousness will always be the same. Beside that, the most important message is for you enjoy the process and the stuggle, like many people have the dream to finish college and when they finish they're not more happy, that's because we have two selfs, the experience Self that lives in the now and the remembering Self, who dream about future and have nostalgia about the past, but is never in the now.

[@elliewill5097]

Mefisth the way he said it was so depressing tho. He was literally bashing other people for trying to be a better version of themselves as if he knows “every single person who does self help” this video is so toxic. I could barley last 3 minutes.

[@pablogalvz]

Great line, “it’s actually very hard for us to know exactly what we want.” I believe this is one of the key aspects of self improvement as we know that goals help motivate us to action so we dream up some utopian life/situation but how do we really know this is what we want if we’ve never had it? For example, I know a couple people who have a nice yacht... sounds great but they spend more time maintaining, staffing, and paying for it than enjoying it. The question is do we release the notion of the “end game plan” - that utopian dream life - and focus on smaller, measurable improvements while enjoying the daily “struggle” and continually improving as a human over time? Enjoy the journey rather than focusing on the destination so-to-speak? Or is it still important for us to have that “big-a__-hairy-goal” in life?

[@Motivationgrid]

That's a nice question. I love it :)

[@BearKlaw]

I love that episode on Bull Shit with Penn and Teller where they debunk the self help industry.

[@Rongkim12]

Always believe that good things will happen. Live Now

[@zamansizezgiler]

If you just watch and do nothing, what do you expect to happen? Mental inertia is death.

[@MuhammadAmeen-wn9nh]

I thinks lot of people did not get the real meaning of what Mark is telling. Read his book 'subtle art of not giving a fck' and you will understand what he wants to tell you

[@insaini87]

Family, friends, career. These three are a must for some sort of happiness. Need a life purpose too.

[@heathcliffbeareroflight3161]

You hit the nail on the head!

[@CFredRN1]

Ram Dass "Be Here Now"

[@nk3034-u6u]

I think , the main thing isn't try to change , but dream , see the person who u wanna be then work harder and harder cause yes classically , there will be struggles , you will fall but if u learn how to " fall in love with struggles " that's the key , so three things to change and become whom you are : dream , face struggles wisely and then fulfill your goals

[@bbuildingmarch7060]

I thought everything I was doing was helping me get closer to my goal. But it turns out, everything I was doing only brought me further away from reaching my goals. I was running away from my pains and fears.

[@Motivationgrid]

That's what I've been doing my whole life, the thing is nothing happens overnight and it takes action and then it takes time.

[@bbuildingmarch7060]

@@Motivationgrid Time..... I always thought action and thought NOW. But I never thought time...

[@bbuildingmarch7060]

@S M I was going to the gym 6 days a week; literally everytime something in my daily life gave me frustration, I would go to the gym but that only distracted me from my problems. I would read books when I got mad about something not working out in life. All that ever did was distract me from my problems. That's what I was doing. Getting temporary relief. I need to be honest with myself and actually face my problems to solve them.

[@bbuildingmarch7060]

@S M Well the thing about health boosting activities as escape mechanisms for me was simply the fact that when i was frustrated about not having things my qay in life, i assumed i wasnt good enough. so i did things like weight lifting and cardio in the gym to get a better body and reading books to become more knowledgeable so that i could "be good enough". Never worked though. Same old results

[@Motivationgrid]

@@bbuildingmarch7060 That's the big issue with the self-help industry. I will just say this, 98 % of the self-help books/videos are just money making schemes. It's very easy to sell dreams to people. Stay tuned for my next video, it will explain a lot.

[@onelife9441]

Mark Manson! What an AMAZING guy! *Who you are is defined by what you're willing to struggle for.* *-MARK MANSON*

[@smallstudiodesign]

I think it's time to seek balance between learning from others (which has its necessary place) vs just going off on one's own joourney of self discobery without outside influence ... figuring out our own paths

[@ZamaniSahudi]

Never thought of it this way. Probably i fantasize too much without action. But fantasy and imagination is part of life and should not be ignored. I think it is beyond what our current science understand. We are all connected. Our instinct are most likely correct. This video will led for people to believe that imagination is not part of it.. but i dont think it is true.. imagination play a big part of your success. Without imagination there is no further plan.. the rest is where your willpower to succeed at what you want. Just my 2 cent.. correct me if im wrong

[@mathieupoulin7041]

Just WOW !! Thank you 🙏

[@ad9297]

I think this guy is depressed

[@eugenemarkendico7173]

Many people are like this. Self improvement don't work to anyone and people watches and consume self hellp but get addicted and make them insecure because they don't achieve something

[@aleschromec2286]

I’m not big youtube commenter but now I feel I should write something as I think that this is amazing direction you’re going. I’ve come across your channel several times but I don’t usually care about motivation channels but after this video I’ve subscribed and looking forward to see your content. I’ve come from nothing to pretty good life in last 7 years. Tried everything, did everything but Mark Manson, Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson helped me the most. Please remember! Even if you get less subscribers, your impact will be much more meaningful.

[@Motivationgrid]

Thanks for the comment, it's always nice to see some support. And yeah, I might lose a big chunk of my audience and not be able to pay the bills, but at least I'm doing what I think is right.

[@clydenolet736]

Any self help/motivational guru worth their salt will point out - the ONLY help. Is SELF help. They can sell you the blue prints but there is no finished product without hard work.

[@TheAero]

Self help always talks about hard work and taking action.What is this guy talking about.Even his book is a self help that contradicts itself and talks about self help only of positive thinking which is a very small percentage.

[@ms2t07kentinyus9]

when you realize you are watching this anti social media video in a social media

[@Siberius-]

Mark has a youtube channel. I highly recommend people watch some of his videos in full context. A lot of people here are very mistaken. Actually just one way to wipe out a LOT of self-help shit, is to find out that Libertarian Free Will does not exist, and this concept of a "Self" does not exist. That is where you should start, really.

[@iamsodope5373]

You don't get what you dream of, you get what you work hard for.

[@BeDangerousGroup]

"If you'd like more information on how the self help industry is bull shit, buy my self help book!" I loved Marc's book, but don't shit on someone else's system while promoting your own.

[@YoungNOfficial]

This is an eye opener!

[@Motivationgrid]

Glad you liked it. Better things are coming, no more bullshit.

[@YoungNOfficial]

@@Motivationgrid haha great to hear

[@JaysonT1]

@@Motivationgrid I see you have read the subtle art...lol. 👍

[@prince5724]

The harder the battle the sweeter the victory

[@jacktrika]

And you will see alot of what you said in older people.. notice how slow/patience they are.. walking is a struggle that caters to the art of patience/gratitude..

[@jacktrika]

What you speak is truth..glory to god for he is the eternal authority that casteth authority also through our lord jesus christ..

[@shadowflare7230]

Weird that's basically the message I got from most self-help book and video I watched before.

[@zenvic1150]

Know your passion and follow your passion. That's success.

[@ad_aiii]

This taught me nothing..

[@fadexrucks1598]

Great video! Nothing wrong with self help videos though because they all emphasize the resilience and work aspects. Of course you’ve got to work on yourself and step into action. It was phase for me.

[@Kamsa-x2w]

Anti self help genius

[@jeremytaylorfrancisgleaves3854]

Mark manson really started me on loving books. Glad to see him on this

[@xaviusamericus9561]

*And how was this video helpful at at all? Sounds pretty much like all the discouraging things people’s parents told them why they weren’t going to be successful, special people. This video is a major downer.*

[@KayFlowidity]

Watch self help videos and actually work hard to apply it. See your own personal results and view this vid as a reminder to keep grinding...which is Self Help in itself. They're speaking of "Extreme cases" of those folks who don't walk the talk similar to religious folk who are lifelong church goers but aint shit spiritual about'em. They're just happy to be a part of something they view as bigger than them. Otherwise, they have no purpose. People NEED something to BELIEVE in. It's not about the start or the finishline. Its the person you've grown and improved to be during the journey rather than the destination. That's when your REAL success shows up anyway. We plan and God laughs. Control your effort and that determines your outcome which grows your competence and builds your confidence. By then you're in love with the "Process" or scrap it and do something else you "Enjoy". Again, Self Help! That doesn't make the industry "ALL" bad. That exposes you as a lazy fuck when you KNOW you're not doing shit with what you're learning. Most of us are taught this in grade school and sports during our childhood. I agree with alot in this vid only after Ive taken the meat and thrown away the bones of cynical contrarian talk which is to some in itself...Self Help. Think for yourself folks. Facts don't give a shit about opinions ✌✌✌

[@sandrajovic9304]

Yeeeeeeeess thank you ❣

[@restinpizzas8760]

If you want to learn more for this just buy the book. Its a great book and helped me a lot. The name of the book is (The subtle art of not giving a f*uck)