I Decided To Revoke My Wife's Access To My Car And Our Life Spirals Out Of Control r/Relationships

[@Tyanna01]

Story 1: OP needs to check that his car doesn't have any tickets on it. This woman had 47 unpaid tickets totalling over $1500 in on her car. I'm willing to bet money there are tickets on his car she didn't tell him about.

[@tallyp.7643]

I gotta wonder where they live and how the hell you can manage to get HALF as many tickets--unpaid or otherwise--without it dinging some bureaucratic bell a lot sooner. Probably parking tickets mostly where license and registration wouldn't have been handed over for the cop to analyze and put in the computer unless the wife walked up while they were being written. Of course, multiple jurisdictions don't talk to each other. Still--what the hell did she expect? I suspect she's an ostrich and gotten really good at burying her head in the sand over the course of her life, hoping the bad stuff goes away or pretending it's not there, hoping no one finds anything objectionable. This woman's a lazy wreck more than anything, ADHD or not.

[@ingloriousbetch4302]

And that one commenter trying to blame ADHD was infuriating. Even IF she had ADHD, that worked t have come close to excusing it.

[@RiverWoods111]

@@ingloriousbetch4302 She probably does have undiagnosed ADHD. It doesn't excuse it, but I think that she also has piles of mail she doesn't open either, and that is why she didn't pay them. The problem is that women with ADHD go undiagnosed because we present differently than stereotypical men/boys. Men who present with the "feminine presentation also go undiagnosed. Hyper-creativity, chaotic life, cars are always a mess, and so on and so forth. He described her so spot on to what we ADHDers do. Nobody can ever ride in my passenger seat because, for some reason, all of my antifreeze and fluid for my old car are on the floor of my front passenger seat? My trunk is empty! Oh, and my car is almost 20 years old. The thing is we have to set up ways to work around this. For instance set a reminder for myself a month before my car has to be registered, and then that reminder goes off every day till I do it. I like to sign in and make sure I don't have any tickets on the state website because I don't like to open mail. I also don't live where you can get parking tickets. I can say my ADHD daughter used to get so many and they would get sent to me, and then after she wrecked my car, she had to give me her car and pay it off for me. She got the insurance money for her new car. When we went to transfer the title, she had a $600.00 outstanding ticket on the car I had been driving for several years. OMG! It doesn't excuse the fact, that she got her car impounded because she F*d up. That is on her, but taking her hubby's clean car for the weekend and then leaving him with a dirty car for a weekend with all of that... She shouldn't have access to his car.

[@helixxia9320]

@ingloriousbetch4302 they werent excusing it. they were saying it could be important for her to get checked out, because she could get many resources and help to better manage life and procastination and routines etc. with medication and courses. it could be a life changer

[@lynnw7155]

Is OP really going to stay with her? Someone that irresponsible won't change. He's going to have to not trust her and check on everything she does. She knows he will leave if she does it again, and she's already shown she will lie.

[@julianne089]

I’m a disorganized creative person and I’m halfway through story one. His wife is just an AH. Being disorganized doesn’t give you permission to take other people’s crap and make their life harder...

[@ivorynk752]

i have ADHD but I don't take my friends stuff without asking

[@fytrndm]

That's the thing that bugs me. People blame it on ADHD or other "reasons" not realising that some people are making deliberate choices to be an arse to those around them. That's not cool, it's just enabling crappy behaviour.

[@Cruz2917]

I have ADHD and I never done any of that crazy stuff debts have to be paid you don't take things without permission. it may distract me and make me forget stuff but not a mountain of debt she just chose to ignore it. unfortunately my wife is just as good with finances as OPs wife and I had to pay off her credit card debt which wiped out most of my savings and now I'm just waiting for the divorce to finalize ...... She still won't tell me what she spent all that money on 😡🤷🏽‍♂️

[@tallyp.7643]

You can bet she took OP's car because she knew her car looked like shit and she would've been embarrassed to have her friends see her car looking like that. She's lazy and figured she'd impress with a better looking vehicle she wouldn't have to take the time to clean first. I admit, I'm suspected ADHD (taking steps to get a diagnosis) and am generally lazy about cleaning my car myself (I tend to forget til I get home and by then it's dark, and I'm working on better behaviors... just takes time to make the changes and routine stick), and because I'd be afraid of making a mess in someone else's vehicle, I would never dream of borrowing theirs.

[@Midnight0Mistress]

My dynamic is similar to OP and his wife but I would NEVER do or think of doing this to my bf. OMg, that is horrid! And I have ADHD. I can't go over 1k without feeling upset.

[@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets]

Took OPs car, cost him his trip, cost him over $7000 to get HER car back from HER problems, cost him even more to help with her debts, AND she lied about a major dealbreaker from before they were engaged? Divorce time.

[@khughes9574]

But IF they divorced, wouldn't the OP be on the hook for half the $52k? (I've never been married and I'm not a lawyer so I don't know, but from what I understand, all debts incurred during marriage are the responsibility of both parties.)

[@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets]

@@khughes9574 probably, but if he continues, she will continue to accrue debt. It's either bite the bullet now, or do it later when it's a much bigger bullet. A deal-breaker for him was financial stability: she isn't just a net zero contributor, she's negative on that, and she also completely lied about that the entire time

[@shells500tutubo]

@@khughes9574 She said she had all that debt before they were married, just paying the minimums monthly. I'd wait for her to pay it off, then divorce her, because this is going to happen again and again. She needs a psychiatrist as well as a therapist, and while ADHD is probable, this type of behavior is also common in people in the manic phase of bipolar disorder.

[@doggolovescheese1310]

​@K Hughes trust broken, ev3n if he is on the hook for debt she will only keep more secrets, I hope he ran

[@warlordnipple]

​@@khughes9574am lawyer and depends on the state of it would even be an issue. For most states it would be no. Debt and assets gained before marriage aren't shared unless marital assets are commingled with them. For community property states it would be a presumption that he is on the hook but if the debt was not disclosed before the marriage then he might be able to get out of having any portion of it included in the communal marriage property.

[@jamestown8398]

“I didn’t tell the truth because I knew you’d leave me if I did.” That makes it worse! It basically means she lied to OP specifically to steal away his agency.

[@tallyp.7643]

Yup-- no different than baby-trapping, cheating, or drug problems. If you can't be honest with your partner and freaking TALK at minimum, you've got no business being married or dating.

[@WobblesandBean]

Yuuuuuup. OP is an idio† for staying with her! What is WRONG with him?!

[@WobblesandBean]

@@tallyp.7643 I am an utter mess, but I am up front with all of my prospective relationships and if they decide they don't wanna deal with my issues, that's fair. That's why I bring it up early before either of us catches feelings. Yes, it made it very difficult to find partners, but I finally found someone who is fine with me the way I am and we just celebrated our first anniversary today!

[@berylwheaten9385]

@@WobblesandBean Congratulations on your anniversary ❣💗❣💝❣💗❣

[@SpaceMonolith1.4.9]

Because purpousefully lying to your partner through you'r entire relationship to get them to stay with you is a really good idea that cant go wrong whatsowever/s

[@LayfonDragnia]

Mark, you’re not being harsh at all. Op made their deal breakers clear and the wife decided to lie. Lying about SIX credit cards and all those citations is a deal breaker to me. If I were op, I think a temporary separation at best, divorce at worst.

[@Loaves_of_Cat]

Plus something like that will drag op into the debt with her due to being her legal spouse

[@teacheschem]

I think she has multiple things she is struggling with and that person with the ADHD comment might be correct. I hope she can get this in order. Can’t blame OP for being livid.

[@rubymeaddle]

​@@teacheschem ADHD and maybe some manic episodes, I have a low limit CC because I have episodes of irrational spending.

[@nnicsu]

All that AND she used the excuse of “but you didn’t ask about my financial situation” so she thinks she didn’t lie because she wasn’t asked. That makes her sound super manipulative, disrespectful and selfish, if not straight up a red flag for abusive behavior. Run OP.

[@DrownedInExile]

I agree, OP should separate from her for at least 6+ months, and insist that she pay him back the $7 grand he spent to clean up her mess. And consult a lawyer for a post-nup, to protect himself. I don't think he's wise to stay with her. But if he's serious, he has to show her consequences for her actions.

[@craigbarnave7857]

I’ve been married 20 years. If you think for a second, she did not know her tags were expired and she had enormous amount of parking tickets. You’re a dummy. She took your car so she wouldn’t get pulled over and left you hanging. This is one super selfish woman. Run.

[@jeaniebee3657]

story 2...is everyone missing the part that everyone in the family knew the gender of her baby before she did because of the MIL blabbering?

[@lynnw7155]

Yeah, that wasn't a :mistake", it was totally poor judgement.

[@BNezzy]

The below comment is for you but you will have to sub out mistake for poor judgement to apply. the whole "it wasn't a mistake, it was a choice" is such a load of crap and the people who say that are arrogant as heck. Everything someone does is a choice. Some choices turn out to be a mistake and are regretful, others aren't. So yes, mistakes are choices and choices can be mistakes. Did not know this needed to be explained to the human race in 2024. yikes.@@lynnw7155

[@rockfan243]

Her claiming op never asked about her financial situation when they were dating.............what did she think him CLEARLY STATING financial responsibility and being debt free was a que to do?TELL HIM THE EFFING TRUTH. she essentially trick him into marriage.

[@nightcorelucario2218]

If I'm understanding story 2 straight, OP was the last to find out the gender of her unborn baby? This is not a mistake anyone should just "get over", this is something MIL needs to be apologizing over profusely. How the heck do you not just keep your bloody mouth shut

[@AndyyWithAY]

I'm furious with the wife. Someone tells you financial security and a debt free life are important to you and you keep 50k in debt a secret because they don't specifically ask about your financial situation. If this isn't a lie by omission I don't know what is? The wife sounds like a child who needs a handler. I couldn't continue with her.

[@MaryTheresa1986]

OP should file for divorce and sue her for fraud.

[@nationalsocialism3504]

Almost all women do need to be treated like other intelligent domesticated animals (human children, dogs, horses, etc)... women aren't designed to be "independent" and they lack the neurological wiring for it, they can't handle the stress load without just shutting down as the main means of coping. Hence why she had spent years making the mandatory minimums while disregarding everything else & taking no actions to solve the problem. It's a man's responsibility to deal with the stress load & their subjects to follow instructions... when a man doesn't have authority over a woman then they will misbehave/act out like like children act out with poor parents, dogs with poor owners, & horses with poor riders. They aren't decision makers but order followers... OP just needs to man up & acknowledge his failure as a man to be a man, take all financial responsibility away from her & give her an allowance so he can fix the problem of her failure of father from not being a man letting her get herself into this problem.

[@veravanriet2761]

@@nationalsocialism3504 Wow. Tell me you've never met a woman without telling me you've never met a woman. That's condescending as fuck

[@nationalsocialism3504]

@@veravanriet2761 I've known plenty of women and women's misbehavior is almost always the result of poor male ownership... just as with misbehaving dogs & horses. Your bullshit religious belief in Transhuman Liberalism doesn't change biological reality... evolution happened regardless of how much you delusionally want to deny it. Hominids didn't evolve to be distinct independent creatures and even more so than other pack animals the disparity between the sexes is far more since our child rearing is so much longer. Women that could and were independent would be at a severe evolutionary disadvantage to women who were dependent making them cleave to a male for resource procurement... any neurologically independence in women was weeded out through hundreds of thousands of years of evolutionary pressure. 50 years of Social Engineering centered on biological denialism has no bearing upon millions of years of Hominid evolutionary engineering... all your religious faith is doing is making shit so much worse as evidenced by how Womens happiness gets worse every year for more than the past half century & more than half of women are currently on some form of psychotropic drugs to help their brains cope with the unnatural distressing unhappiness that your religion causes them.

[@damien678]

@@nationalsocialism3504 What does it say about men if women are supposedly like children? Jfc dude. This isn't just wildly sexist but also has creepy af implications

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Story 1: I love how the story starts out with, “I love my wife, she’s awesome!” But the title says that their life spirals. So I’m just waiting for the pin to drop. Edit: Omg. That’s so much debt. 😮

[@immapotato1]

she makes so much more than OP does too so it's wild.

[@Kimberly_Sparkles]

@@immapotato1 It may not be that much. If she makes 25K more, then a man in that position probably earns even more. Her employer may expect her day-to-day appearance to reflect the highest income of the role. My income went up 10K and my new bosses expect me to spend most of that money on clothes and accessories and hair/makeup that they think are appropriate for my role. Unfortunately being a woman necessitates lot more spending on your appearance. If she's aging, she could be doing facials and other "luxury" treatments to maintain her appearance. Those things eat up cash. If she was already terrible at budgeting, things like that can just push you over the edge.

[@niyablake]

waiting for the pin drop, instead we got a bomb

[@Loaves_of_Cat]

@@Kimberly_Sparkles that sounds like ur boss is crossing a boundary, expecting u to buy sh*t based on ur increased pay. So long as u look professional and put together, how I dress ur self and what u spend ur money on is none of their business

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@Kimberly_Sparkles The men and women at one of the companies that I directly own and manage make the same amount IF they are doing the same EXACT job. If not, their wages vary. I also pay SOME of the women more money to purchase a certain type of clothing I want them to wear when doing a certain job. It is some pretty risque-looking clothing that most of them wouldn't be caught dead wearing at any other time or in any other circumstances despite the fact they REALLY look great. That's why I don't make them use their own money to purchase this clothing. IF they want to keep some of it, then they can use their own money but most of them keep the clothing just for the job although a few of their husbands/boyfriends have expressed an interest in them buying the clothing for "special occasions" (I don't ask lol). The clothing is kept in the dressing room in our office complex where they get prepared before going out on the job. I know the guys that work at the law firm across the hall sure appreciate when the ladies are heading out on the job or if they need to walk across the hall to coordinate with one of the attorneys lol. Some of these women are handpicked by me for their obvious good looks and very fit bodies and then are "trained" by me personally and some of them have a varying degree of experience doing what I need them to. Some are even part-timers as they are Theater majors from the local University.

[@winsterphilipp347]

I legit learned a lesson from this story, when you're in a relationship look at their bedroom or car. That's a good indicator to the upkeep of their life. I gotta go clean my room.

[@Depressionmillennial]

this made me feel seen

[@fytrndm]

My mum gave me an advice. Look at how they treat their possessions/living space, if _any_ of it are treated with such disrespect, run for the hills. Of course, a bit of clutter is fine but the level of mess OP described was...yeah, that should've been a no. I get not everyone's gonna have immaculate car/living space but throw away the garbage, that's the bare minimum.

[@Loaves_of_Cat]

@@fytrndm it made the wife sound like a hoarder

[@tallyp.7643]

I hear ya. I've been in a depressive funk the past couple of months and my house would probably be IMPROVED if a tornado hit it at this point. Getting my groove back with beautiful weather, open windows, and actually listening to Mark while throwing boxes out (stupid burn ban still not lifted, but can't stand having them in plain sight anymore) and scouring my kitchen. Takes time to build good habits, but you gotta be honest with yourself about how you let things get so bad, too. I don't think OP's wife's done much of that in her life.

[@teacheschem]

Uhoh!!! I have a stable job, doing okay but my bedroom is a mess. 🤣

[@Bluedragon094]

So OP's wife lies by omission to get with him, continues to lie by omission throughout the entire relationship, and then when her lies catch up with her she has the audacity to justify herself. The only thing crazier is that OP decides to stay to "try and work it out." How OP could ever look at her or trust her again is beyond me. You know damn well when things get difficult again she's going to slip right back into lying again. That's who she is as a person.

[@tallyp.7643]

I shudder to think of them having kids now--how much debt would she put them in (and hide) in the hopes of creating the "most perfect environment" for their firstborn? OP better check their birth control while this counseling thing is going on--if she thinks she's losing him, I wouldn't put her past intentional/fake pregnancy to keep him (with more and more lies to cushion the fall).

[@FredRated1967]

At this point, it's best to kick her to the curb.

[@WobblesandBean]

@@tallyp.7643 THIS. She's irresponsible and dishonest, how can OP trust her with their future children? She's making it up now, but I guarantee she'll go back to her old ways soon enough. She's going to make it so OP will never be able to retire.

[@kumarules118]

some people could overlook and forgive when they are already in love, I truly understand. That was too much to take though, I imagine OP is the one managing everything after that cause the irresponsibility

[@kimsvisualdiary]

I have a friend that’s in a similar situation. He knows what he needs to do but he “loves his wife” and won’t leave her. Meanwhile, she’s constantly getting them in financial holes and looking for any excuse she can to quit her job whilst still sitting on $50K in student loans.

[@Undomaranel]

Organized is NOT the same thing as being responsible. OP seems to have the two ingrained as synonymous when they are not.

[@HadrianGuardiola]

True, I am unorganized but still responsible.

[@annabordelon6663]

Op is correct in this.

[@Swnsasy]

I'm a mother of 3 and I just cannot imagine not knowing the sex of my children until AFTER everyone else.. I feel like she's grieving her parents and that is why she's being so harsh, it's understandable... I feel so horrible for her...

[@jjbud3124]

I can't help but feel she is being a bit too "touchy." This kind of thing would not have bothered me at all. I would have gone on with the whole reveal and made a joke out of it. It's not good to take offense at most things and just realize people are people. If you don't want anyone to know something - simple - do not tell even one person. For me, this would not be cause for any conflict or hard feelings and certainly not a cause to alienate otherwise good people.

[@Swnsasy]

@@jjbud3124 As I am also with you on this, I would be upset and would have just turned it into baby shower 2.0, I also understand her hurt and pain being an only child, losing both of her parents within weeks of each other and not being able to go through with what her and her mother planned for when she got pregnant.. I wouldn't be as harsh to my in laws either but again, I do understand. I also agree with her husband. I think her grief of loss is driving her emotions...

[@Joce-bl7qi]

@࿐ꨄSwnsasyꨄ࿐& J JBud Don’t forget this isn’t just about her finding out the sex of her baby last, it’s also about character issues… The SIL not coming to her right away with the mistake but letting it snowball and the MIL intentionally spreading information that she knew was sensitive and precious to her DIL (even if MIL didn’t deem it that important she knew how important it was to her DIL and could’ve acted accordingly out of love & respect). Those points deal with integrity and foundational aspects of how a person handles themselves. OP said she became very close to MIL and SIL so understandably she’s even more upset finding out they’re not the people she thought she knew.

[@MargaritaOnTheRox]

@@Joce-bl7qi This same thing happened with me, except with my actual sister and mother. This was before gender reveals, but I wanted the sex to be a surprise. My sister came for the ultrasound. She really wanted to know the gender, so I gave permission to tell her and I looked away. At my baby shower, I got tons of boy stuff. Hmm. My sister justified it by saying she ONLY told my mom...who apparently told everyone else. The night I went in to labor, I still told my son's dad to call my sister to be with me in the delivery room. Their character is not in question. They help me anytime I need it, no questions asked. They're both still amazing people, and I owe them so much.

[@meiwa2020]

@@jjbud3124 grief is hard. Pregnant and grieving is hell. I got pregnant right around when my brother died of covid and let me tell you, the pregnancy hormones mixed with deep grief are horrible.... yeah no I get that it can seem like "just a gender reveal" but especially if in her mind it was a way to work through the grief by honoring her mom... yeah I can see that feeling unforgivable at least for bit, even if those not in grief and pregnant might not understand. Smoother life to be able to think/ feel like you do, but grieving while pregnant is a special kind of hell that I hope few others have to experience.

[@mgen278]

The words I hate the most: “Now what do you guys make of this one?” and “I’m going to turn this one over to you guys”….because those words mean there’s no update 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Love your channel, Mark❤

[@KCCAT5]

When the hell did giving birth become a spectator sport? Who are these people that think they're entitled to be in the delivery room while you push out a baby?

[@AndyyWithAY]

I don't understand why people feel the need to reveal some else's baby news. Why do people care this much about what's in someone else's uterus. I just don't get it. I would never do this. It's not your news. Why would you do this? They deserve consequences, especially knowing how important this was to OP

[@dodgyyoutuber9560]

Because what’s in that person’s uterus is going to be a part of your life. It’s also your DNA, and it is a natural instinct to be involved in those of your family.

[@AuskaDezjArdamaath]

Daaaaaamn! It’s a good thing the OP kept separate finances 🤨

[@groofromtheup5719]

still didn't save him from a ruined trip and a $7k bill. He still got stuck with her bills from before the marriage regardless.

[@shells500tutubo]

It's a myth that separate finances offer some type of protection. They are legally married, so their debt os one, no matter how separate he thinks it is. Creditors just want their money. They don't care who incurred the debt and they don't play nice.

[@jackiehyde5893]

I found out that my boyfriend drunk texted his girl-bestfriend... i was shocked! he wanted to... kzbin.info/www/bejne/e3vEd6auiM2Xqqc

[@rogerrabbit80]

@@shells500tutubo "Debt accumulated in marriage is considered marital debt, while debt that was amassed in one’s name before the date of marriage is considered separate debt." OP is not responsible for debt she accumulated before they married. It's like student loans. Your student loans are yours. If you get married after you get the loans and divorced before they're paid off, they don't magically become loans for the two of you. They're still your loans, and you still owe the money.

[@srwater1]

​@@shells500tutubodepends on the state. My state the only thing they go after you for is medical debt or debt that has both your names on it.

[@poohbear4515]

If she wasn’t so incredibly selfish and took his car without asking, or anything, she still probably kept everything a secret. So in other way, it’s kind of a good thing she was incredibly selfish. I think this marriage isn’t a good one if one person lies about her finances, charges, and just being either absent-minded, or again, incredibly selfish.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

Ooh, I think we passed "absent-minded" some time ago. She is straight up irresponsible. OP has had to shoulder a lot of burden to try and fix this. At least she appears to be making amends on it, but OP will have to keep on it consistently. Though will he be OK doing that for the rest of his relationship?

[@jbgra2566]

Story 1: One thing is being disorganized and "chaotic" and another thing is being plain irresponsible, specially when accumulating thousands of dollars in debt. So much for "great communication". Story 2: I'm not really a fan of gender reveals myself, but I do understand where OP is coming from. At the same time, she has to really evaluate her relationship with her husband. Instead of being understanding with someone who lost both her parents, he's not taking into account his wife's feelings. He's being so uncaring right now. Instead of trying to see her point of view, he's making things worse

[@BNezzy]

Summary of your Story 2 assessment: husband is: not taking wife's feeling into account, uncaring, making things worse. Interesting summary. It's funny how you described the husband to be every TV sitcom husband in the 90's and 00's. Ever wonder that it could be that men just aren't in tune with their emotions and feelings as much as women and don't clue into this stuff? That women could maybe instead of being passive aggressive, just be open and honest to their husbands about how they are feeling? But no, re-evaluating the relationship while talking to strangers on the internet as you suggest is waaaaaaay better.

[@rylashadow18]

S1) I'd encourage the OP to do a post-nup. Just outlining that if she does anything like this again the marriage is over and any as well as all debt under her name is solely her's alone. She knew the boundaries and lied about this for years. It's bound to happen again. S2) Tell hubby that what they did was ruin the connection you were looking forward to in the way that it felt you could connect to your mom with him knowing that she's gone. That you not wanting people who've taken something special and ruin it is completely acceptable. That you need him to honor his vows to you that said you're his new family, his first priority and his partner. If he can't do that he can go back home to his mom and not come back until he's been through counceling as well as parenting classes. Stick to your guns by saying you have every right to feel comfortable in one of the most vunerable moments in your life and people who have taken advantage of the last time you were are highly unwelcomed to see you or your child until they make it right.

[@indiashante1560]

Story 1: I wouldn't take my husband's car even if I could without permission.(I can't drive a stick shift) He keeps his vehicle WAY cleaning than I do but mine still isn't that bad. I have ADHD and I'm not where near that bad thank God. Edit: 47 tickets, 6 maxed out credit cards, insurance lapsed ect... I'd be pissed! 🤬 She has student loan level type debt! I wonder if she can file for bankruptcy? I honestly think this is breakup worthy.

[@megadude967]

Story 1 : Honestly I'd divorce over that. Put aside the actual debt itself, the fact that she's been hiding that much debt for pretty much the entire relationship?! That would shatter my trust to an unfixable degree. Story 2 : OP's entirely in the ri9ght. Honestly Sister telling MIL is something that can be a mistake. But MIL telling EVERYONE is a choice she made

[@ineedhoez]

50k is not a lot of debt. Honestly. If he is a PM, he is probably making 100k. She is making 25k more than him. She can pay it off relatively easily.

[@BNezzy]

the whole "it wasn't a mistake, it was a choice" is such a load of crap and the people who say that are arrogant as heck. Everything someone does is a choice. Some choices turn out to be a mistake and are regretful, others aren't. So yes, mistakes are choices and choices can be mistakes. Did not know this needed to be explained to the human race in 2024. yikes.

[@flyboymike111357]

Expired plates means that she hasn't been paying what you guys call the car/road tax which means that the plate doesn't have the sticker saying taxes have been paid and the registration and inspections are up to date. Making the car restricted from public roads.

[@indianspartan76]

Story 2: People gotta realize that they are all different individuals. MIL is the AH here. SIL sounds like she genuinely made a mistake

[@groofromtheup5719]

they both blabbed because they wanted to blab. SIL not only blabbed, but she didn't bother to tell OP that she blabbed.

[@StephFish1004]

Story 1: She had the debt presumably when they started dating (from what OP said) meaning she hid it for upwards of 7 years and still had no intention of telling him, it's just that she got caught....OP why are you trying to make it work with this person? This isn't being disorganized this is a pathological liar who actively chose to ignore your boundaries and deceive you to get what she wanted (you not to leave her). And she apparently managed to pay off that much debt in six months after getting caught but "just couldn't" in those seven years? This is not someone worthy of your forgiveness

[@MarkTrueblood]

I also work in advertising and I assure you we aren’t all like OP’s wife. Good grief. 😅

[@deborahpinkey1264]

You are SO right. there's a difference between being the "creative type" and just being a slob. OP's wife was a slob not just in the upkeep and maintenance of her car, but also in her finances. Is it ADHD or some deeper psychological disorder? Who keeps the apartment clean and tidy? How did OP miss that aspect of her personality? Her financial mess can be cleaned up and it sounds like they are well on their way, but she is going to have to continue with counseling to find out how and why she got herself into the mess and maybe determine how to stay out of it once it is cleaned up. Transparency going forward is an absolute must. "For better; for worse; for richer, for poorer" and all that.

[@MarkTrueblood]

@@deborahpinkey1264 It’s great that she’s getting help but I would not be handling this as benevolently as OP, as this represents major breaches of trust. ADHD may be part of it but I just think she’s extremely impulsive and addicted to chaos.

[@renattaburke3500]

Financial irresponsibility was a deal breaker for him. His wife defrauded him, she was a liar from day one.

[@coreymartin6486]

47 tickets/citations in 2 years? Geeez. 14 would have been a lot, but 47???? She definitely needs some kind of help.

[@DivisibleByWaffle]

This story reminded me to pay off my monthly credit card bill. God damn! Don't spend money you don't have!!

[@shadowbear123]

Story 1: I'm glad someone pointed out the ADHD in the comments because before the updates, that's EXACTLY what it sounded like to me. The financials could possibly also be explained with that mental illness, but that's an explanation - not an excuse. The wife is still the AH in that situation, she could have been more open about her situation and asked for help with it earlier - perhaps that could have stopped things from spiraling, but that's hindsight for you.

[@TheWhiteGoblin]

ehhh see I know exactly how this happens (re: the symptoms of adhd). First comes impulsivity and disorganisation, so impulse buying and overspending. Also a tendency to not look through the small text of offers. Now you could say its her job as an adult to do this but adhd, specifically untreated adhd in this case, can make that near impossible and these offers are actually designed to take advantage of people with these sorts of issues. The disorganisation and forgetfulness really hits here, being late on payments, forgetting about bills etc etc. So the debt starts piling up. This is where executive dysfunction comes in. For someone with adhd doing the research and paperwork needed too deal with debt effectively is really really difficult. Even if you need to do it and you know you need to do it, it doesn't make it any easier to actually do. This is where shame, rejection dysphoria and guilt sets in, even people without any mental issues often feel deep guilt and shame over debt. Your long term bf says that finances are important and you agree with him! but you cant seem to get your debt sorted and you are afraid. So you lie, telling yourself you will sort it out and everything will be fine. Of course that doesn't happen. Its the exact same thing with the car, but on a smaller scale. I can genuinely believe she didnt know how many citations she had, or that she was so far out of date for her registration. Untreated adhd is a beast to deal with, but as you can see as soon as the wife was given help the money issues sorted pretty quickly. I simply hope she continues to get that help because it is very easy to become overwhelmed again without it.

[@shells500tutubo]

@@TheWhiteGoblin The money issues sorted pretty quickly because OP PAID HIS WIFE'S DEBT!! He needs to divorce her. In the event of death or divorce the creditors do not care WHO incurred the dbt. It is THEIR debt if they are married.

[@TheWhiteGoblin]

@@shells500tutubo did you not listen to the update? she had over 50k in credit card debt, which she paid down to 14k in 8 months. Add in the 7ish thousand the op spent and she would have paid it all off in a yearish. That is a sign that there was something more than just negligence going on imo. Now of course the op can decide he doesnt want to deal with all of that. Any one can leave any relationship for any reason after all, but i think it is pretty clear something is/was going on with the wife that was more than being irresponsible.

[@wessexdruid7598]

So - an ADHDAH.

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Adhd isn't a mental illness. It's neurological.

[@dragonlord3376]

The lack of financial responsibility and the enormous levels of deception are insane; if I were OP, I'd peace out of this relationship in the blink of an eye;, this woman just can't be trusted by any measure at this point; but if for some reason I decided to stay in this relationship, I'd be 100% sure she can't touch my finances and screw me over too. This relation ship sounds like it's had a hole in it for years and it's finally sinking

[@tallyp.7643]

He needs to drop her (and her filthy car) off at her parents' place and tell them to finish raising their lazy princess and manage her own life before she tries to latch onto anyone else (or be allowed to return to him). No husband should be forced to deal with this magnitude of lies and bullshit from someone who is supposed to be their partner in life.

[@ineedhoez]

The hole was that they never actually combined their lives in the first place. Don't get married, if you are just going to live like roommates.

[@ondank]

Halfway through the first part of the story and I was already furious. Then he got pulled and I couldn't believe it.

[@rhylla_864]

Story 2 "I have a right to be there!" Op had a right to not hear her baby's sex second hand but here we are dude

[@oldgreggsmadmemes4431]

Hopeful?!?!?! That trust is dead and she clearly has a problem with money

[@juanhaines7295]

Story 1 I wonder if she'll pay op back for all that money.

[@Artemis_-yy1nt]

NOBODY "has a right" to be in the delivery room. It's all about the comfort of the person giving birth. And if somebody (even the father) is too panicky, so stressed out or in this case a assholish mamas boy, he shouldn't be in the room. Only people that are helpful, supportive or calming should be there.

[@DeathclawJedi]

Expired plates Mark. You weren't sure about how that works. Well in the states we have a sticker on the plate that needs to be changed every year showing we've paid the tax for whatever the frig they use the money for(sure as hell isn't road repair round my parts) And sometimes you even have to get a whole new plate if they change style or color of numbers and what not. But I am guessing that Wife had expired plates is meaning the sticker for the tax was from more than a year ago and expired.

[@DarkJediPrincess]

It’s every 2 years in Maryland. The interval varies from state to state, but renewal is still required in all of them.

[@DeathclawJedi]

@@DarkJediPrincess First off.... Dig the Name!!😉👍 I could see how 2 would be a great way to do it. The 4 states I've lived in all were a 1 year deal so learned something new!

[@bellasmom2597]

As an adult if you know you forget things you need to develop ways to remind yourself. It sounds more like she just doesn't hold herself accountable for her own finances.

[@tenorlove]

I have a cousin and his wife who are like the couple in the first story, only he's the spendthrift and she is frugal. What finally saved them was that SHE took over ALL the finances. She took care of the bills, and gave him a cash allowance for his spending money. He told me that had she not done this, they would have been bankrupt and homeless. Now, they are enjoying their retirement as snowbirds.

[@judyjohnson9610]

I had to do that as well with my ex. The power company called up one day and said we were getting cut off if the bill didn't get paid that day. He grumbled about it but got over it. His dad was talking to my ex's older brother one day going on about how his wife shouldn't be handling the money. "Dad, she's way better at it than me. End of discussion" And they are doing well in their retirement

[@livewellwitheds6885]

OPs wife ✅took his car without asking ✅didn't tell him about the unpaid citations ✅either has no registration or its so cluttered nobody can find it ✅likely made her SO miss his ski trip due to the car being impounded who would want to let her continue to drive your car after that? if she wants his car so bad she should start by keeping it clean and legal, which may be a reason she uses his over hers

[@Nerdbookworm]

If he stays with her, he deserves everything coming to him. Zero sympathy.

[@missmoxie9188]

Well okay, There’s disorganized and then there’s completely careless. His wife is acting like a child NOT keeping her vehicle registration current. That’s just part of being an adult

[@sgtjarhead99]

Well, she's broken all the other rules so far. You sure she's not cheating as well, OP?

[@fytrndm]

I don't think I will ever get gender reveal, however, I get why it was important to OP. Both the SIL and MIL betrayed OP's trust. Yes, it's a "minor" thing in the grand scheme of things but didn't mean she wasn't hurt. What's worse is that her husband thought taking his mother's and sister's side was far more important than the hurt they inflicted on her. This woman who lost *both* her parents, who she definitely wished are still around to experience being grandparents. The level of callousness of the entire family towards her astounds me.

[@shells500tutubo]

But it is NOT a minor thing, no matter what MIL and SIL and hubby think. It reveals a lack of respect and dismissiveness of OP and this will not improve. She cannot trust these people. I learned early on that I could not trust my own mother or sister to keep confidences. As a teen I cannot tell you how horrible it is to hear your mother gossiping away on the phone about your private business that she encouraged me to share because she was my mother. Started gray rocking her before there was even a name for it and before I even understood what I was doing. Now OP's SIL and MIL are going to always complain about how "distant" OP is from them. I know these people well.

[@fytrndm]

@@shells500tutubo There's a reason why there were quotation marks around the word "minor" in my comment.

[@avidion6274]

honestly the fact she lied for that long and tried to make herself into the victim would be it for me

[@shadowspond3488]

Theres no way I would put my husband in that situation. She was so rude! She should just say sorry and only drive her own car. Shes playing the, Im the girl and I deserve the best card🤬🤬🤬

[@diarradunlap9337]

There are a lot of women who play exactly that card, until it comes up "overdrawn," or, better yet, "EXPIRED! NO RENEWALS."

[@luizalouyoga]

Cowardice has made me fall out of love a couple of times. The admiration goes away. Your girlfriend was a real coward not to tell you the truth and it’d be completely understandable if you lost admiration for her. People can be clumsy, disorganised, disoriented, slow, lazy, but…. Being a coward when it comes to telling the truth is just… sad and pathetic.

[@melindaflick631]

In the US, you pay annual car registration, with a sticker that shows the year and month the car registration expires. I've let it expire by accident, when plates and dates got shuffled around. I got a fix-it ticket, and made everything good. I could not handle a car filled with trash, expired plates, and no gas. That's a nasty thing to do to her husband! I'm not at all sure I could reconcile after all that.

[@maxinemyers9215]

Need an update on the second story! 💐

[@Its_like_the_T-Rex]

First story. Op needs to walk away. A woman this disorganized would be horrible to have kids with. I imagine she'd forget her infant in her car's back seat for hours on a hot day.

[@KarmikCykle]

Well, probably not _her_ car's back seat, but _someone's_ car for sure.

[@safespacebear]

I made the mistake that the OP in the first story did. I assumed the wife had everything handled until one day my landlord caught me in the parking lot to ask me why I didn't pay rent in months. Later I looked thru her desk drawers and found out we owed 7k to the power company. I'm still paying off debt and getting a divorce. I couldn't forgive her endangering our son's welfare by possibly making us homeless.

[@elizahamilton5599]

Story 1 NTA! The wife sounds extremely lazy! She didn’t pay her tickets or realize her plates were expired🤦‍♀️

[@LoveandBonestm]

First story was RIDICULOUS!! That’s HIS CAR!! Use you’re own freakin car!!

[@amphoteric]

story 1: oh i would most definitely be speaking with a lawyer to go thru with a divorce. the wife is the worst!

[@kennethbarkley1491]

OP should check out the girls weekend, there is So Many stories of how those girls weekends are a lot more than just girls hanging out.

[@pelgervampireduck]

story 1: she's not "desorganized", she's a jerk taking advantage of the guy. I would divorce.

[@smitasharma6072]

My question to the wife would be ……….” What Exactly Are U Spending Your Money On “.!!! I mean she makes good money, so where does all that money go ! I assume she’s putting in her share of the home expenses and possibly on her own upkeep ! But she has 6 Credit Cards maxed out……..she has even managed to max out her line of Equity !! What in the world is she up to ! She even has borrowed tons of money from her family and friends ! Is she a shopaholic or doing drugs ? The husband is a saint for not kicking her out !

[@kevinroberts8441]

She was able pay off 30,000 in debt in 6 months but wasn't able to pay for years before. She was more scared to live beneath her means that living without op till she was caught dude should of left

[@HeiwaTori]

when my mum was pregnant she has her friends asking to be in the delivery room, it was really stressful for her (& there were complications with me) & the nurse just said nobody except these 2, which was my dad & his mum, my mum did want her there as her mum was in a different country & not able, so luckily she just had her husband/father of the child & mother in law(who was good support), so thankful for that nurse stepping in & saying fuck off best part? she doesnt talk to those friends anymore, like I didnt even know them growing up, but the friends she had before who knew reasonable boundaries she's still friends with (1 is my godmother)

[@susanlosey9511]

Wow! $50,000 + debt. They need serious counseling, couple and wife needs debt counseling. I agree trust issue is in dangerous ground.

[@ashleyKennedy5]

Woman acts like a child, doesn't pay her own bills like a child, throws tantrum like a child. She's kid that hasn't grown up.

[@simac8396]

story one: ok this is not just being messy and unorganized, she had expired license plates, no registration papers, and unpaid fines.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Her 10k credit card was maxed?? 🤯😵 WTF!! OP said she had a good job, how on earth do you max a card with that limit?? How is she living and why is she living like that??

[@untiedshoelaces2588]

Story 1: YIKES! RAMEN ON PUMPERNICKEL! What an absolute disaster of a human being! This is a straight-up example of why it is the best idea to have separate finances! Imagine, had they combined their finances, OP might have ended up penniless and not had known until it was too late. IMO, any relationship that has a foundation upon a lie, is doomed to eventually fail. The wife deliberately chose to lie to OP in order to get married. What else would she do in order to get her way? Story 2: The mil has issued the first salvo to show her dominant place in the child's life. OP did well to set future boundries, though I hope she is also planning an exit strategy for her and her child, because this is going to escalate into the husband's family against her.

[@zacharydrewke3344]

You are an amazing narrator

[@MarkNarrations]

Thank you so much Zachary, that means the world

[@AndyyWithAY]

Did some cleaning this morning. Out on my daily walk now. I've waked 30-45 minutes every day in October. It's a delicious overcast gloomy day and after my walk I'll be relaxing in bed. Lovely lazy Sunday 🥰🥰

[@MarkNarrations]

Amazing, keep up that good work my friend!

[@carolroberts4614]

We haven't really done ours over the weekend, I did a little yesterday.Lots of home things to do. We have some hours to spare after a hospital visit, so might go and walk along the seafront!

[@jamestown8398]

Sounds wonderful.

[@vampire9545]

47 tickets over 2 years is 2 tickets a month. 🤔🤔🤔 There's add then there's ignoring reality

[@imajinallthepurple]

Wow, this one hit hard. 😣 Financial irresponsibility was a major factor in ending my second marriage. Except we did share finances. He just hid the debt from me until he couldn't keep up. I'm still paying every month and will have to for a few years to come... (Btw, you kinda messed up your numbers there, Mark. She'd reduced the debt BY 14K, not TO 14K. Quite a significant difference in this case. 😅)

[@Bleg94]

1. Story: so it is true to her character to not care about OPs discomfort ... ? Update: her not telling OP wasn't "a mistake", it was a deliberate choice to deceive him it is not that "she couldn't" it is that she didn't want to, she makes 25k more than OP and she even was able to make the debt down to 14k AFTER SHE STARTED TRYING! their relationship seems to be based on her lies and deception she only cares to fix things now that OP saw them, I wouldn't be able to trust her anymore

[@rebeccataylor2049]

you just need to get out of that relationship because that sounds like the most terrible thing ever!

[@blessedcutie8983]

Wow. Op's wife deceived and trapped him.

[@nessa4042]

Story 1 so NTA, I'm a somewhat disorganized person, I know this, and while I try to keep things organized everything seems to fall back into chaos whenever I get distracted, which is often, but I acknowledge this and that means when I'm using something of someone else's or I'm in their space I always am super conscious of what mess I'm making and always make sure to clean up after myself right away or I won't remember to do it, and someone shouldn't have to be following me around cleaning up my messes, so I make sure to do it immediately. And there is a difference between just being disorganized/messy and being just gross, like while I may have a million pieces of paper around my room, and towers of books/notebooks/art supplies around, I would never have any sort of food/drinks lying around and let things get dirty cause that just invites bugs and leads to hygiene issues, which I won't tolerate. Also being forgetful is no excuse, if you know you're forgetful you should be doing something to remind yourself, like for bills/appointments/events etc I always put a reminder in my phone so it can remind me before hand when things are due, I'll also write it on my calendar that I keep in my bedroom so I'll see everything that's going on that month to help remind me, there are tons of ways for people to help themselves.

[@GinHindew110]

Moral of the story: Its easy to be awesome with borrowed money

[@cjstar01jones17]

Oh I am so glad someone else mentioned adhd. Bc that is exactly what I was thinking while I was listening. I myself has adhd and everything he was explaining was me when I’m off my meds. I’m so glad he’s not actually mad at her, and that he loves her. This is definitely something they can move past. But yea, she does need help. Or assistant. But don’t go out and tell her “get babe you have a problem” bc that’s just going to make her defensive. Most likely she knows something is wrong, these hiccups would be visible in other aspects of her life.

[@groofromtheup5719]

How can he move past being incapable of ever trusting her? She has proven she can't be trusted with money. she has proven she can't be trusted to manage even little things. she has proven she won't tell him the truth when it is easier to lie.

[@WhtAbtBob10]

Story 2: NTA but OP needs to deal with her feelings about her mother not being there.

[@Julienna]

Which she will for the rest of her life. There are many events we want to share with our parents, so it is not like "get over it, it is now old news". You cannot solve the pain of losing a loved one within a few therapeutic sessions or few months. She lost PARENTS. BOTH! She has NO siblings. The closest person now is only her unsupportive inconsiderate selfish mama-boy husband... This is a very unpleasant situation to be in.

[@FlamesofRebirth3836]

As someone with ADHD I absolutely loathed OPs wife for most of the story. My room and brain are a mess and I’m working really hard to put them both in order. For her to ditch her citation riddled trash heap of a car and take OPs is disgusting and pathetic. She didn’t even try to get organized! If you don’t want to fix your life, fine but be up front and don’t drag other people into your shit. Edit: glad she is taking control of her life now but I feel like it’s too little too late for the relationship. Secretly saddling your spouse with massive debt is a huge betrayal. She could have owned up BEFORE getting married and taken all these classes and shown op she was working on it. Financial irresponsibility can be fixed but there’s no indication that she even tried before getting married.

[@maurer3d]

Story 1 (before update): NTA, sounds like your wife intentionally took your car because she knew her car wasn't legal to have on the road. Story 1 (Markees comments): In the USA you need to register your car every year in the state you reside, most states also require a mechanic to inspect the car and confirm it is safe the be on the road as well.

[@UzumakiDonnoHinata]

Oh hi, Mark! Hope you and Poppy are well! I'm trying to put in costume contacts before work. Pray for me. XD Much love!

[@MarkNarrations]

Praying Gwen! :)

[@johnathangreay987]

The exclusive rights to be in the birth place should only go to the father and mother. That's it.

[@princesssunshine874]

It does not sound like OP's wife is getting actually therapy. The financial counseling and the whittling down of the debt is a huge deal. However, if she has a bipolar or ADD and it's not being treated, it's only a matter of time before she starts getting caught up in debt again.

[@Riunlarose]

First story She paid down 14k not the debt is 14k she still owes over 40k still

[@lisaedwards2542]

Op2 so sorry you have married into a family of selfish emotional bullies. NTA It's a breach of trust your husband is an emotional bully. RED FLAG.

[@dawnwagoner8307]

This 😢reminds me when I met a guy at a party. You couldn’t sit anywhere in the car because of, speeding tickets all over the place

[@scheneli000]

“I don’t get how she’s not thinking about it like OP” It’s called being inconsiderate af. So many people in my life are like this. Once in a while, sure okay, it slipped the mind. All the time? No real excuse, you just don’t care about the other person’s feelings or boundaries That’s at least how I see it Thanks for helping me through my move Mark! Much love!

[@Detector1977]

S1: Why is that men ALWAYS start of most stories with something along the lines of "I have a great relationship with my wife as I KNOW we both love eachother" and then it turns out he hasn't got a CLUE??

[@jeaniebee3657]

first story...she so has thought about it..or thought about her wants not his..she sounds like a narcissist. she knew she has tickets, she knew her tags were expired, she knew you needed the ski rack and she knew she had no gas . she just didnt freaking care all the ADHD crap is just trying to give her an excuse

[@katrinschirmer8018]

and she knew being in debt was a big deal for him, and deliberately hid her debt from him so he'd stay.

[@lovelysakurapetalsyt]

Yeah, ADHD *can* be debilitating but the way she's using it is to not own up to anything she's doing!

[@jeaniebee3657]

@@lovelysakurapetalsyt she wasn’t using it but it was a commenter suggesting it. My point is not everything is adha related. For years that’s has been thrown around for irresponsible and irrational behaviors instead of someone just taking responsibility for being buttholes.

[@nai5949]

@@jeaniebee3657 Do you have adhd. Do you know how hard it is?

[@cali115]

Since he decided to stay with her, I will not give any sympathy when this blows up in his face.

[@JstMee2]

NTA!! My husband is like this drives me nuts!!! We only have one car.. 🚗

[@fytrndm]

You can't always blame mental health for when things goes to crap. She accumulated 52k debt. And she already knew that financial irresponsibility is a deal breaker for him yet she lied. Sorry but I'm jumping on the divorce bandwagon on this one. Trust is such a fundamental thing in a relationship and she crushed that when she lied to OP. I don't even know if therapy eventually helped them. Personally, I would've walked away solely on the fact she lied about core values that he thought they shared.

[@tallyp.7643]

She never came clean til the car's impounding blew her lies out of the water. If they had a chance in hell, it would've been LONG before that. She should've come clean herself or just let him go. I mean, how do you justify that to yourself? Maybe it's just because I'm a sucky liar, but sheesh--how can you justify lying to keep someone in your life? It's only gonna make it worse when it blows up--you can't rugsweep tens of thousands in debt forever, especially when the hole seems to be getting deeper and deeper each month instead of shallower.

[@Bleg94]

also it only took a few months to bring that 52k debt down to 14k, so it is not that she "wasn't able to" but that she didn't even try and didn't care

[@jenniferg2771]

Expired plates: you need to pay the fee once per year and you get a sticker to put on the plate. Has to do with taxes to pay for roads.

[@damealeta3541]

I like the commenter's remarks that basically said I'm sad about my parents, you took something special from me, give me time and stop hassling me. I would have been furious too. NTA

[@candiebarr6745]

I had to relisten to the one... everyone else knew the gender before the actual mother? Yea, not. Not a mistake or anything. MIL chose to tell everyone before the actual mother found out. That's a major asshole move.

[@heatherdickau5335]

Story one- The wife knew exactly what would happen with her car. And it was just a waiting game for it to get pulled over again and then impounded. Mostly the last few tickets the officers told her. This is why she took her husband's car on the trip. She had stuck her headnin the sand and was avoiding the issue.

[@birdley9577]

Congratulations to the father on being just a pay check.

[@JasperCatProductions]

Story one she has a car that she is to lazy to clean so she steals your clean car. That is so disrespectful and I would never let her use my car again. Don’t put up with crap anymore, she is an awful person. In what universe is your wife correct, the nerve to get mad at you about her asshatery!

[@9999plato]

No, She should have zero access to your vehicle. My wide is almost as bad, its registered and insured but the trunk is jammed full of crap and half of the back seat. She does not ask for my vehicle often though. It just freaks me out how she wanted the shiny black coupe and she never washes it and the inside is full of crap. Black is a great color if you keep on top of it but the worst for showing filth. I wanted the white coupe with the tan interior but we got all black that gets so hot in the summer.

[@jerriewyatt905]

Story 1… I’m a woman and I absolutely wouldn’t want her to have use of my car…I wouldn’t let her have use of the car either.. maybe this will give her a wake-up call.. it’s too bad she wasn’t the one driving the car when it was stopped and impounded.. Holy Cow! After the update I have to say OP’s wife is totally nuts! How she was able to hide all this is shocking, not only that , but, OP’s ignorance of what was going on is just as unbelievable .. I really don’t see how they can make the marriage work if something major doesn’t happen ..thankfully they don’t have kids… Last story…OP’s NTA… the MIL & SIL ruined the moment for OP.. her .. husband is forcing Op to make the decision to kick him out too by his actions and not being more understanding of OP’s feelings..

[@Ani_Watermelon]

"She's not thinking about IT"....Sure, Jan. 😑 She is DEFINITELY thinking about IT. Otherwise, why and how in the world she always prefer your nice car over her filthy one.

[@cpaul9269]

S2 - Seriously - WTF is up with everyone's entire family and neighbors and shit wanting to be in the delivery room for a birth?! I'll never understand - i would absolutely be there if a partner asked, of course - but to WANT to be in there? People be craycray.